Not in 3D Great Movie Mistakes


Not in 3D

Robert Webb has more silver screen slip-ups from recent hit movies, exposing shocking gaffes from the Hollywood blockbusters, Oscar-nominated masterpieces and biggest flops.


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The name's Webb, Robert Webb and I've got a license to kill...

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the next two hours of your life,

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with all the mistakes from the latest movie releases.

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It's the return of the show that leaves the movie industry

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shaken and stirred by pointing out

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when it's made a right Thunderballs...up.

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Our team of movie nerds have been on Her Majesty's secret service

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to spot this year's brand new batch of movie clunkers.

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They're for your eyes only and, believe me, Dr No...one will...

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Sorry, I'm not going to do this for the whole show.

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When I said I want a James Bond style opening, I thought you'd

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give me fast cars, exotic locations and beautiful women,

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not a dodgy tux and bad puns.

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What, The Man With The Golden Pun? Yeah, very strong.

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Yeah, great. That's it, forget it. That's the last straw.

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Get Keith Lemon!

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That's better. There'll be no more of that nonsense.

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Instead, we're going to review clip after clip

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of the greatest movie mistakes from this year's films

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and my word is my bond.

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Hang on!

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Don't sequels just do your heads in?

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It seems that, nowadays, people can't just let a good thing happen

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without exploiting it over and over again.

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Repeating the same tired formula until there's nothing original left.

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At least that's what we think here at Movie Mistakes...Three.

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Statistically, sequels gross more at the box office

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than the first film in a series, so do prequels.

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So I've come up with a plan, make the second film first,

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then do the first film second, but because you've made the second film

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first, the second film, which is in fact the first film,

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will technically be a prequel. Ker-ching!

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The best thing about sequels is that they get to have subtitles.

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Terminator 2, Judgement Day, Babe 2 - Pig In The City,

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Garfield 2 - who allowed this to get made.

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The foreboding and climactic Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows.

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Here, the charmingly named Mundungus knocks over a stack of newspapers.

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Listen, I panicked...

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Daily Prophets everywhere.

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But, perhaps a special cleaning spell is used as, later on,

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we see the papers are neatly stacked again.

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Abracadabra? Abraca-bad-ra.

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Harry Potter critics say it became a little repetitive towards the end.

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-I think that's a bit unfair.

-They're after you, mate.

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Oh, hang on, that waitress covers the same piece of ground twice.

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What about all the people the wedding?

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There she goes...

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and there she goes again.

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Maybe they had a point after all.

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Helena Bonham Carter straddling Emma Watson is a sight to get any

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Harry Potter fan-boy hot and bothered, but not like that.

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I'm talking about this massive movie clunker.

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SHE SCREAMS

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She goes to carve into her right arm,

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then, suddenly, she's attacking her left.

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It's awful. There's not even any mud for them to fight in.

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Ah, pirates - making alcoholism fun!

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It's the boisterous Pirates Of The Caribbean 4.

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And, as Geoffrey Rush tilts his hollow leg high to get a drink,

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Jack Sparrow wants a taste.

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I want one of those.

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Sadly, his hands are tied and could never tilt the leg high enough.

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Here's to revenge - sweet and clear.

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Revenge.

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How'd he do that?

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Come, Hector.

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It's the flaccid Little Fockers

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and here's Jessica Alba dropping off Ben Stiller in a lovely

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car with black seats.

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-Are you sure you're going to be OK?

-Yeah.

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Well, it's not him you should worry about, it's your car

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because over night...the seats have turned white.

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You OK?

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Following the example of Dustin Hoffman's hair.

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Oh, it's the atmospheric Paranormal Activity 2.

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BANG

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And there's some spooky goings on in this household.

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Oh, keep an eye on the pots and pans hanging from the rack.

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That's enough.

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Oooh, they keep changing colour and shape.

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A poltergeist or cock-up?

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You decide.

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You know, it takes so much time and money

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to CGI those robots in Transformers,

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I'd just not bother putting them in every shot.

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I mean, who's going to notice?

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Unfortunately, we are!

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Keep an eye on this character, Brains, who transforms into

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thin air!

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Shame this film can't transform into a good one.

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That's what you love about me.

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You've got some BLEEP.

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It's annoying when there's loads of action going on.

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There's never time to shave, is there, Shia Labeouf?

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Especially when you're getting attacked by a flying robot.

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No!

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But, wait a second, he hasn't, has he?

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From Shia Labeouf to sheered Labeouf.

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You think you're a hero...

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It's near the end of transformers and time is tight.

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Who's the messenger?

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But look at this clock, it's got a mind of it's own.

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Starting at 2:20.

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It jumps back to 12:15...

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..and then back further to 11 o'clock.

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It's like Back To The Future, but with robots

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and without Michael J Fox.

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Actually, forget it, it's nothing like Back To The Future.

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Last clip from Transformers and lucky old sheered Labeouf is getting

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a snog from his latest supermodel girlfriend.

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But take a look at her mucky paws.

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I'm going to hold you to that.

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They keep changing from clean and over his shoulders,

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to dirty and on his face.

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The most popular genre of the moment seems to be the superheroes.

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Spiderman, Superman, Natalie Port-man, X-men, that's another one.

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I've always found their name confusing.

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X-men, they're ex-men. So they're women.

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If that's the case, I suppose that explains

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why I fancy Wolverine so very much.

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Everyone is quick to talk about superheroes, but no-one

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in interested in the real life heroes.

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For me, my hero in life has always been my old English teacher.

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He was caring and passionate, a real inspiration to all he taught

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and by night, he donned a mask and cape

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and went out and fought criminals.

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I'll never forget you, Mr Batman.

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Now it's time for breakneck action hit X-Men First Class.

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But that isn't a history class,

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as while they may be flashing back to 1944...

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that photo of Einstein was taken in 1947.

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Class dismissed.

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Here's James McAvoy as superhero, Professor Xavier.

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But every superhero has his weakness and for Xavier, it's windows.

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See that?

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I read the teleporter's mind.

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Ouch! He bangs his head against the glass.

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Curse you, window, I'll get you next time!

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I read the teleporter's mind.

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Now, James is rightly thinking twice

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about shooting his mate in the head.

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But look at the distance the gun is from his head,

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it changes with every shot.

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That's every shot of the camera, not of the gun, thankfully.

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No, I can't.

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Now have the animators made an error here? Look at Emma Frost -

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she's the one that's a woman.

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When she changes from diamonds back to human

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her hair style changes.

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Here it's loose.

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Now tied back.

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We don't harm our own kind.

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With her hair in that state, she must have been made from uncut diamonds.

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On to the let down that was Green Lantern

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and this guy is ecstatic because all day, he's been trying to keep

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his slippery headphones on his head and now he's finally made them...

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Oh. Oh well. Back to the drawing board.

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Take a look at Ryan Reynolds brown eyes.

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You know, you can't be a pilot if you're colour blind.

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Maybe they should have the same rule for casting directors because,

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according to this film, when he was younger, he had blue eyes.

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It's Ken Branagh's smart take on Thor.

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But where's the cock-up?

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As Dylan says, the answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind.

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Look at that stiff breeze blowing their hair across their faces...

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that suddenly disappears... and it returns.

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Misquoting Dylan again, let's hope, at that height, they're not sitting on the eves of destruction.

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I try, I fail.

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I'm going to get everything back.

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In this scene, it's tipping it down with rain

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and everyone's getting soaking wet.

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Apart from the guy from The Hurt Locker,

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who keeps a dry face at all times.

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With that condition, he must get through a hell of a lot of Nivea.

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Thor, again, and an exciting moment where a coffee spills over.

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But there's no use crying over it because,

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in just a matter of seconds, it goes from being knocked over

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to upright again.

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Better latte than never.

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In my opinion, a good movie always leaves you asking questions.

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Who was Keyser Soze?

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How did Nice Guy Eddie get shot? And, dude, where is my car?

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but this selection of clunkers is so terrible, it will leave you

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asking only one question. What were they thinking?

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Very geeky comedy with the film Paul, now,

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and the invisible alien looks at Nick Frost's passport.

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But it should say British citizen and not British subject.

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Could be worse, it could be French subject.

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That was always my least favourite subject.

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He's from another world.

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Take a look at the green oven mitt on the wall.

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It's about to disappear.

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If it makes you feel any better, my existence...

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There it goes.

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That's the thing about sci-fi films, I mean, the rule book is thrown

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out of the window.

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# Amazing grace... #

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In fact, I bet they did it on purpose.

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I bet it represents something like, you know, us,

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like, are we really hear or are we just...

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Oh, yeah.

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Oh, never mind, it's back.

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Turns out it just represents a mistake they made.

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And now fireworks. Remember the code...

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That'll put us behind the tree...

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..light them at an arms length...

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Hey! Watch the fuse!

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..stand well back...

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That's not funny.

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..and take your head torch off twice.

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Arrh. Boom!

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But watch Pegg's head torch. He just lets it vanish.

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He's no responsible adult.

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Pretentious arty action in Hanna.

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Here, Cate Blanchett runs up a flight of stairs in comfy shoes,

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dropping her monkey head along the way.

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No time to worry about simian head gear, there's a child to chase.

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But, apparently, plenty of time to change shoes.

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Let's see that again.

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Before you can say, "Here come the girls," she's in boots!

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Here's Hanna herself and I know what you're thinking,

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Hanna was brought up as a trained assassin in isolation

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near the arctic circle, so how come she's got pierced ears?

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This movie has more holes than Hanna's lobes.

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Hanna's having a face-to-face chat with her friend Sophie,

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lying on her left hand side.

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And here's Sophie who, for some reason,

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appears to be also lying on her left side.

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So, how are they face-to-face?

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I like you.

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Look me in the eye and answer me!

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I'd like to have a friend.

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In the soppy Just Wright,

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Scott walks Leslie over to a covered object shaped very much like a car.

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She asks what it is and he reveals, to her great surprise...

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that it's a car.

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No, you didn't!

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But keep your eye on the antenna.

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It's visible even though the car's covered

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and doesn't move with the fabric.

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Just WRIGHT?! Just WRONG more, like!

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ROBERT WEBB CHUCKLES

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Here's the moribund Something Borrowed.

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Keep an eye on the girl on the far left fast asleep.

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Now she's wide awake and catching up on the latest gossip in Grazia.

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Can't have been a very interesting article because, look,

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sleeping on the job again. A bit like the continuity editor.

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On to the tongue-in-cheek Red now and here's lovely Helen Mirren

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looking glamorous,

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but then she could make a cheap plastic watch look glamorous.

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Which must be exactly what she's done

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as while the necklace sets off the metal detector,

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the watch doesn't.

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Still with Red and here,

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Bruce Willis gets a little help with his handcuffs.

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He's handed a key, but wait a second,

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the handcuffs aren't even locked.

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How much help do you need, Bruce?

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Do you want him to tie your shoelaces while he's at it?

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You can't beat watching a film in 3D.

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Not only do things jump out the screen at you,

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but when you get to any rude bits, you can do this. Ho-ho!

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3D films are making huge waves at the moment,

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but what will be the next step? 4D? 5D?

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Here at Movie Mistakes 3, we can reveal the latest

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technological advancement that's about to take Hollywood by storm -

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8D.

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I'm about to watch the latest Saw movie. OK!

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HE SCREAMS

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Turn it off! Turn it off!

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I think I'm going to stick to 2D.

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Dreary TRON: Legacy now and look at the dangerous driving.

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Surely he can't get away with this.

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He won't because the police have clocked him with a speed gun.

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But the police seem to have failed to spot the fact that everyone

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is driving the wrong way down that road.

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It's impossible to catch a cab in New York,

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so why not let a cab catch you?

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Watch out, here come the police.

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Here they are.

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You pay!

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And here they are again.

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Oh, he looks hard(!)

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As this poor lady's about to find out.

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You don't want to fight him.

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Look at the neon strip on her right leg.

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He's so tough, he can kick someone's trousers back to front.

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See, the strip is on the opposite side...

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and her side parting too.

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What a guy.

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A CGI Jeff Bridges speaks to his army of baddie motorcycle couriers.

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There's clearly no-one standing directly in front of him. Look.

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But the reflection in his visor suggests he's dead opposite him.

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He must have pushed his way to the front.

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What a crawler!

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Jackass 3D now and those hardcore lunatics

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take on one of my biggest fears - self-assembled furniture.

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Watch the corner of the room where the plant is,

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because in no time at all, they're going to put up...

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a bookcase!

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Jackass 3D is amazing.

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It really feels like they're bursting through your telly.

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See!

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Piranha 3D full of action, gore and mistakes.

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Here sheriff Elizabeth Shue falls in a big lake.

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Deputy fellow manages to get her out

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but moments later, she's bone dry. What a mistake.

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They should shoot the sheriff and the deputy for that one.

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Now, what's this idiot up to?

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You can't put a walkie-talkie in water.

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Oi, mate! They're not called swimmie-talkies, are they?

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It'll short-circuit.

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But in Piranha 3D anything can happen, even if it shouldn't.

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OK, I'm in.

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And the walkie-talkie works perfectly.

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'Do you copy?'

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The dim-witted Resident Evil: Afterlife

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and Milla Jovovich is taking down some baddies.

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As most ladies will tell you,

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although you may turn up at work in killer heels,

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keep a comfy pair of shoes in your bag, just in case you have to...

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you know, run up a wall.

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But like any good hero, she wants to be buried in her boots

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and her heels are back on.

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Back to killing baddies again

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and these zombies are almost on top of our heroes.

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But while everyone escapes, Milla stays to face certain doom.

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Oh, what a shame, Milla.

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All those things you wanted to do before you died

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and now there's no time.

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Oh, hold on, they're suddenly miles away.

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Hooray! Now you've got time to do that lifelong ambition -

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a bungee jump.

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Whoopee!

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That's pretty smart thinking.

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Now, this chap has a gun trained on Milla.

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Stop right there.

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And this other bloke looks nasty.

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There's no way out of this one.

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If only the gunman was as close enough to kick as those knives.

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Oh, now he is!

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Well, it was either that or grow telescopic legs.

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They say you should never meet your heroes,

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which I guess is why no-one ever comes up to me in the street

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and tells me how much they love my work.

0:20:320:20:34

Thanks, guys. That means a lot(!)

0:20:340:20:36

Everytime someone crosses the street to avoid meeting me,

0:20:360:20:39

I think to myself, "There goes a true fan."

0:20:390:20:42

The hard-boiled and vicious Mechanic goes a bit Weekend At Bernie's

0:20:480:20:52

as Jason Statham covers up his killing by making the corpse

0:20:520:20:56

swim a few more lengths.

0:20:560:20:57

But look at his grip on the dead man's wrists.

0:21:010:21:04

It should clearly be visible from above,

0:21:040:21:07

but it's not.

0:21:070:21:08

What would Bernie say?

0:21:080:21:11

Well, nothing. He's dead.

0:21:110:21:13

Angelina Jolie in the disjointed film Salt,

0:21:150:21:19

here climbs down a lift shaft.

0:21:190:21:21

Just a wait few minutes for the lift, you impatient madam.

0:21:230:21:26

Thankfully, she emerges from what must be

0:21:280:21:30

a filthy and greasy lift shaft

0:21:300:21:32

with a pristine white shirt and clean, spotless skin.

0:21:320:21:35

How does she do it?

0:21:350:21:37

It's the crackpot action movie Red

0:21:410:21:43

and Bruce Willis has kidnapped a lady and taped up her mouth.

0:21:430:21:47

But the more she gesticulates, the more we can see that

0:21:470:21:50

she has enough movement in her arms to take the tape off.

0:21:500:21:54

Maybe if she stopped complaining and thought a second she'd work it out.

0:21:540:21:58

I'm a little hungry too.

0:21:580:21:59

Moody revenge film Faster now and The Rock hears an eagle call.

0:22:010:22:06

# Who's that riding? #

0:22:080:22:10

Trouble is, the bird he's seeing is actually a seagull.

0:22:100:22:13

Maybe the seagull thinks it'll sound more impressive as an eagle.

0:22:150:22:20

A bit like calling yourself "The Rock,"

0:22:200:22:23

when your real name is Dwayne.

0:22:230:22:25

It's the best actor of his generation, 50 Cent,

0:22:280:22:32

in the very flat Blood Out

0:22:320:22:33

doing some incredible sunglasses acting.

0:22:330:22:36

Look good on you, man.

0:22:360:22:38

They do look good on him, don't they?

0:22:380:22:40

He should never take them off.

0:22:400:22:42

Oh, wait a minute, they've disappeared.

0:22:450:22:47

That's awful continuity if you want my 50 cents on the matter.

0:22:470:22:51

And now, major movie storyline faults

0:22:530:22:56

are reviewed and exposed in Great Pothole Mistakes.

0:22:560:23:01

In the spooky and surprising Sixth Sense,

0:23:010:23:03

Bruce Willis plays Dr Malcolm Crowe,

0:23:030:23:05

a child psychologist who gets shot by a former patient

0:23:050:23:08

and, ten months later, befriends a troubled young boy

0:23:080:23:11

who can see dead people.

0:23:110:23:13

One of whom, it turns out, is Dr Crowe, raising the question

0:23:130:23:16

how good a doctor is he that it took him ten months

0:23:160:23:19

to diagnose his own death?

0:23:190:23:20

Surely there were clues.

0:23:200:23:22

Like his wife crying into her dinner for one.

0:23:240:23:27

Or when she went to a funeral he wasn't invited to.

0:23:270:23:29

Or when she took up starfishing in bed.

0:23:290:23:33

And then there must have been his sudden lack of bar presence,

0:23:330:23:36

and having is phone cut off and not needing the toilet.

0:23:360:23:40

And being able to go to the flicks without paying.

0:23:430:23:45

And even if his unrequited sexual advances towards his wife

0:23:470:23:51

were nothing new, surely when she made the bed with him still in it

0:23:510:23:55

he must have wondered what the blazes was afoot.

0:23:550:23:59

"Sorry, I'm still here."

0:23:590:24:01

You stole the distinctive autumnal tones of my seminal movie.

0:24:010:24:05

Be gone!

0:24:050:24:06

Awards - what are they good for?

0:24:090:24:12

Plumping up the already inflated egos of pampered performers.

0:24:120:24:15

Rewarding someone for doing a job they've already been paid

0:24:150:24:18

far too much money to do in the first place.

0:24:180:24:20

As if all performers have a pathetic obsession with recognition.

0:24:200:24:24

Awards are a complete sham, a massive waste of time

0:24:240:24:27

and, as I stated very loudly at this year's Annual Clip Show Awards,

0:24:270:24:30

I'm not interested in stupid awards and, yes, we have been passed over

0:24:300:24:34

yet again and, yes, I may have been removed by security

0:24:340:24:37

for causing a scene, but there is no way that

0:24:370:24:39

Animal Foul Ups deserved to win again.

0:24:390:24:42

Speaking of awards, here are some Oscar-nominated clips.

0:24:420:24:46

Inception - where strange things happen almost without explanation.

0:24:500:24:53

That's not the way I deal with things.

0:24:530:24:56

Maybe that's how you justify the rain on the window behind Saito.

0:24:560:25:00

But there's no rain on DiCaprio.

0:25:000:25:02

And the continuity editor is thrown off the building

0:25:030:25:07

-for one too many errors.

-What will you do with him?

-Nothing.

0:25:070:25:10

You'd have thought working on Inception would be a dream job.

0:25:100:25:13

Now a maths lesson from revealing biopic The Social Network.

0:25:180:25:21

Facebook's run by some of the greatest business minds in the world.

0:25:210:25:25

So these numbers will be meticulously crunched.

0:25:250:25:28

Let's listen to how their business is divided up.

0:25:280:25:31

That represents a 34.4% ownership share.

0:25:310:25:34

So Eduardo owns 34.4%.

0:25:340:25:38

-You should know that Mark has already taken his percentage from 60 down to 51.

-Oh.

0:25:380:25:43

Zuckerberg owns 51%.

0:25:430:25:45

Who else is in?

0:25:450:25:47

Dustin Moskovitz owns 6.81%,

0:25:470:25:49

Sean Parker 6.47% and Peter Thiel 7%.

0:25:490:25:55

Total 105%!

0:25:550:25:57

Would you like to use my pen?

0:25:570:26:00

Would you like to use my calculator?

0:26:000:26:03

Ooh, the brutal and uncompromising Black Swan now

0:26:070:26:10

and check out Natalie Portman's scarf.

0:26:100:26:13

Did she kill a white swan to make it?

0:26:130:26:15

Anyway, she's about to step through a magical door.

0:26:150:26:18

Why is it a magical door?

0:26:180:26:20

Because as she steps through it, her scarf's no longer round her neck.

0:26:200:26:25

It's like a very low rent Mr Benn.

0:26:260:26:29

The Fighter is so full of clangers, it makes me want to hurt someone.

0:26:330:26:38

Not Marky Mark obviously, he's a bit tough.

0:26:380:26:41

And not Bale, the lunatic!

0:26:410:26:43

But Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots would help vent my frustrations.

0:26:450:26:49

It's good, Dick. I'm just trying to figure out what's best for me.

0:26:490:26:53

Where have they gone? I wasn't going to break them.

0:26:540:26:58

I'm sorry, I don't know who you are or why you're taking.

0:26:580:27:02

Oh, back now. Well, if you're going to be like that I don't want them.

0:27:020:27:06

We're together. Do we need to do this again? Hi, I'm Charlene.

0:27:060:27:09

In the emotional King's Speech,

0:27:110:27:14

the Monarch struggles with a speech impediment.

0:27:140:27:17

However, his missus Queen Bonham Carter has her own struggles.

0:27:170:27:22

Her veil keeps moving on its own accord.

0:27:220:27:24

First it's down...

0:27:240:27:27

Indentured servitude?

0:27:270:27:28

..then it's up...

0:27:280:27:31

Well, we need to have your hubby pop by.

0:27:310:27:34

-Tuesday would be good.

-..then it's down.

0:27:340:27:37

They should make a film of that - The Queen's Manic Depressive Veil.

0:27:370:27:41

Greetings, bold traveller. Far have you journeyed in the search

0:27:430:27:46

of mistakes from the realm of fantasy films and weary must ye be,

0:27:460:27:50

but finally ye shall be rewarded with what ye seek.

0:27:500:27:53

First I will need drop of monk's wood from the vial of crisal wood

0:27:530:27:57

to unlock the spell... Oh, stop this. Just play the clips.

0:27:570:28:00

Here are the fantasy film mistakes. Yeah. No, over there.

0:28:000:28:05

Over to Narnia and the exciting and epic Voyage Of The Dawn Treader.

0:28:080:28:12

Look behind our brave explorers That door is firmly closed. How can they get in?

0:28:120:28:18

Oh, it's already open and now we HEAR it opening.

0:28:200:28:23

DOOR GRUNDLES OPEN

0:28:230:28:25

Narnia's a confusing place. What next, a talking lion?

0:28:250:28:30

What's your least favourite season? Autumn? Winter?

0:28:330:28:37

Mine is The Season Of The Witch.

0:28:370:28:40

That felt longer than both autumn and winter put together.

0:28:400:28:42

Now, look at the boy's sword.

0:28:420:28:45

Did you spot it? Let's see that again.

0:28:460:28:50

Perhaps you can be of service.

0:28:500:28:52

The sword swaps hands. Witchcraft, or maybe glitch craft?

0:28:550:29:00

The actors in this half-hearted and messy take on Red Riding Hood

0:29:030:29:07

must be a bit chilly.

0:29:070:29:10

It's clearly the middle of winter,

0:29:100:29:12

but everyone's wearing short-sleeved garments.

0:29:120:29:14

Rumours that this film was shot on a Saturday night out in Newcastle have yet to be confirmed.

0:29:160:29:20

Clint Eastwood's flawed fantasy Hereafter now, and in this scene,

0:29:240:29:29

an expert is telling us about the great Charles Dickens.

0:29:290:29:32

Over here on this wall we have several illustrations for The Mystery of Edward Drood...

0:29:320:29:38

Oh dear. I hate to be a know-it-all,

0:29:380:29:40

but I think you'll find it was The Mystery of Edwin Drood, not Edward Drood.

0:29:400:29:44

To think I had such great expectations for this film.

0:29:440:29:48

This is the film Your Highness,

0:29:510:29:54

and this poor, helpless maiden is tied down so tightly she can barely move.

0:29:540:30:00

But at the end of the scene, she's able to sit up quite easily whilst still being tied down.

0:30:020:30:08

Your Highness, the film that hits an all-time lowness.

0:30:080:30:14

I always say the key to a successful double act is having two people...

0:30:160:30:21

From my experience, if you want to create a successful double act,

0:30:210:30:24

and you're not very cool,

0:30:240:30:25

find someone who is much less cool than you,

0:30:250:30:28

and then you'll be known as the cool one.

0:30:280:30:30

Some Hollywood double acts work so well together, it's hard to imagine one without the other.

0:30:300:30:35

Tom Hank and Meg Ryan, Brad and Angelina,

0:30:350:30:37

Lindsay Lohan and her parole officer.

0:30:370:30:40

But my favourite double act has got to be Superman and Clark Kent.

0:30:400:30:45

What?

0:30:450:30:46

How can they be the same person? They don't look anything alike.

0:30:470:30:50

He just wears glasses?!

0:30:500:30:53

That is so... So clever.

0:30:530:30:55

OK, then it's got to be Spiderman and Peter Parker.

0:30:550:30:59

The surprisingly dark Love And Other Drugs now,

0:31:010:31:05

and watch Anne Hathaway's arm.

0:31:050:31:07

It's under the pillow behind Jake Gyllenhaal's arm,

0:31:070:31:09

then it pops up before tucking itself back behind the pillow

0:31:090:31:14

like his arm's made of nothing.

0:31:140:31:16

Also, she's not pointing and laughing,

0:31:160:31:18

which in my experience is what women normally do after sex. Right?

0:31:180:31:22

Here's a scene from the goofy Dinner for Schmucks, and just keep an eye on her ears.

0:31:240:31:29

He wants me to curate it.

0:31:290:31:30

Oh, my God!

0:31:300:31:32

She's lost her earrings!

0:31:320:31:34

You call a guy a douche and you get your first museum show out of it.

0:31:340:31:37

Now they're back.

0:31:370:31:38

I love you so much. You're stunning, smart and awful with pronunciation.

0:31:380:31:43

Now they've gone again!

0:31:430:31:45

Apparently she's wearing a new type of jewellery.

0:31:450:31:48

Disappear-rings!

0:31:480:31:51

I love you.

0:31:510:31:52

Oh, my God.

0:31:560:31:58

Here, Steve Carrel wrestles Paul Rudd away from a lift.

0:31:580:32:02

I think we need to cool off...

0:32:020:32:03

Gosh, I hate when that happens.

0:32:030:32:05

Look, he's grabbing him by the arm.

0:32:050:32:08

He's got his arm.

0:32:080:32:09

And then suddenly... it's his right leg!

0:32:090:32:14

What a joke.

0:32:140:32:16

Paul Rudd's not the only one having his leg pulled around here.

0:32:160:32:19

THEY GRUNT AND MOAN

0:32:190:32:22

You are welcome.

0:32:220:32:23

In this bit, Steve Carrel changes his specs

0:32:280:32:31

so he can dress a mouse for its impending marriage.

0:32:310:32:35

Nice cameo by Stuart Little.

0:32:400:32:44

But when he removes the magnifying glasses...

0:32:450:32:48

Oops, his normal glasses are still on.

0:32:480:32:52

What a mouse-stake to make.

0:32:520:32:53

At the schmucks' dinner itself,

0:32:570:33:00

watch out for the lady in the purple dress, who's in two places at once.

0:33:000:33:05

Here she is.

0:33:080:33:10

And now she's over here too.

0:33:100:33:12

Incredible! At least she can pass herself the salt.

0:33:120:33:16

Here, Steve plays such a schmuck that he walks straight into a pond and gets his trousers wet.

0:33:240:33:30

But hang on.

0:33:300:33:31

They're already wet before he goes in from a previous take.

0:33:310:33:36

When they said this comedy was pant-wetting,

0:33:360:33:38

I thought they meant it was funny!

0:33:380:33:41

Oh, the usual scene.

0:33:430:33:45

A man asleep in the bath with his hand down the toilet.

0:33:450:33:49

This is the predictable Just Go With It,

0:33:490:33:53

which was the editor probably said when he saw that the toilet seat was down instead of up on the next shot.

0:33:530:33:59

Just go with it. No-one will notice.

0:34:010:34:03

I mean, that kid's not noticed, and he's sat on a man's hand.

0:34:050:34:09

Jennifer Aniston and Adam Sandler play plastic surgeons,

0:34:110:34:16

but maybe it's their movie that needs corrective surgery.

0:34:160:34:19

I think that's enough. Do you feel that?

0:34:190:34:22

No.

0:34:220:34:23

One moment Sandler is wearing rubber gloves, and then suddenly...

0:34:230:34:26

..they've gone!

0:34:260:34:28

That bra is the perfect size, Sandler,

0:34:280:34:31

Cos you've just made one massive boob.

0:34:310:34:33

Film animals are intensively-trained creatures

0:34:370:34:40

who behave exactly the way the director wants them to.

0:34:400:34:43

-But sometimes corners are cut.

-The pig is tasting my body!

0:34:430:34:46

No, he's not.

0:34:460:34:48

He should be saying, "The pig is eating the food that I've smeared all over my back to attract it."

0:34:480:34:54

The pig's the one who's least at fault.

0:34:540:34:56

The pig is tasting my body!

0:34:560:34:58

Action films now. None of your namby-pamby romance or any of that girly stuff.

0:35:000:35:06

Films for blokes, full of explosions and fights and guns.

0:35:060:35:09

Films for real men. Real men like me!

0:35:090:35:12

Are you talking to me?! Are you talking to me?!

0:35:120:35:15

Oh, you are talking to me.

0:35:150:35:17

What... We can't have the gun. Health and safety. Oh, OK.

0:35:170:35:21

GUN BLASTS

0:35:210:35:22

And talking of being sorry,

0:35:230:35:25

I got kicked out of my local cinema the other week

0:35:250:35:27

after I went up to the lady at the ticket kiosk and told her I was looking for a bit of action.

0:35:270:35:31

I only wanted a ticket to see the new Jason Statham film.

0:35:310:35:35

Well, that's what I told the police anyway.

0:35:350:35:37

Nice vest.

0:35:390:35:41

It's the ridiculous The Expendables,

0:35:410:35:44

where the most expendable thing is that vest.

0:35:440:35:47

Sly got on board wearing it...

0:35:490:35:51

Now it's off.

0:35:510:35:53

He hangs up his guns...

0:35:540:35:56

And it's on again.

0:35:590:36:00

And then it isn't.

0:36:010:36:03

I haven't seen this much vest removal since Take That at Wembley in 1995.

0:36:030:36:08

Cockney legend Statham starting some aggro with some sweaty crims.

0:36:120:36:17

Here he is pokin' along on his bike in his levver jacket and 'elmet.

0:36:170:36:21

That'll take a while to take off.

0:36:210:36:24

But in an instant his trouble and strife is strolling away wiv his gear.

0:36:250:36:30

Would you Adam and Eve it?

0:36:300:36:32

A horrible scene of torture from The Expendables,

0:36:370:36:40

but not as horrible as this goof.

0:36:400:36:43

SHE SCREAMS

0:36:440:36:46

MAN SPEAKS IN SPANISH

0:36:460:36:47

She gives a defiant kick to her captors...

0:36:470:36:50

THEY SPEAK IN SPANISH

0:36:530:36:55

However, when she falls, you can see that her legs are tied together.

0:36:550:36:59

Maybe the director was too tied up to notice this. Thanks again. Thanks.

0:36:590:37:03

Cameron Diaz, in the straightforward and predictable Knight And Day,

0:37:050:37:09

is being harassed by this villain in his neat beard.

0:37:090:37:14

Wow, that beard could make any self-respecting man jealous.

0:37:140:37:19

But not as much as his ability to grow a full beard later that day.

0:37:190:37:25

Blimey. I can't even do Movember.

0:37:250:37:28

Here's Angelina Jolie as Salt in the far-fetched Salt.

0:37:300:37:35

Now, too much salt is bad for you, so let's keep this short.

0:37:360:37:39

Here she's brought along an ashtray and a packet of fags.

0:37:390:37:43

What about your insides, Salt?

0:37:430:37:45

-I need to get to the phone.

-No, no, no.

0:37:450:37:47

Someone should really hide them. Oh, they have!

0:37:470:37:51

But you can't fool Salt. She finds them again.

0:37:510:37:54

Her IQ is as high as her blood pressure.

0:37:540:37:56

Looks like Salt's about to get on a bouncy castle.

0:37:580:38:02

She knows the rules. No shoes.

0:38:020:38:05

That's right. Put them neatly behind you.

0:38:050:38:09

But in the CCTV shot, they're scattered all over the place.

0:38:090:38:12

No party bag for you!

0:38:120:38:15

In this climactic scene, Salt... Spoiler alert!

0:38:190:38:23

..kills the Russian president.

0:38:230:38:25

And speaking of spoiling things, take a look at the dead pres.

0:38:250:38:29

We need a medical crew down in the crypt.

0:38:290:38:31

No need to look for a pulse. His eyes can tell you he's totally fine.

0:38:310:38:35

They say dead men don't talk, but apparently they do blink.

0:38:380:38:42

Now, this is the melodramatic Sanctum,

0:38:450:38:48

and you'll need to watch very carefully.

0:38:480:38:51

Something the director failed to do when they picked a stuntman.

0:38:520:38:56

Look, a watch in this shot and no watch during the stunt.

0:38:560:39:01

I wouldn't give this movie the time of day.

0:39:040:39:07

I always thought that box office number ones

0:39:110:39:13

were what the staff at the multiplex did when they had too many fizzy drinks.

0:39:130:39:17

It turns out I was just wrong about that.

0:39:170:39:21

Anyway, the mistakes you're about to see are all from movies which raked in the most money

0:39:210:39:25

and were Top of the Pops in the week of their release.

0:39:250:39:27

Rumours that Fast Five only got there through charging £250 a ticket are unsubstantiated.

0:39:270:39:34

It's the mawkish Due Date, and Robert Downey Jr's looking cool.

0:39:370:39:42

Peter... OK, listen.

0:39:420:39:46

He's even got those light-sensitive sunglasses.

0:39:460:39:48

Though this scene must have been filmed on a very changeable day,

0:39:480:39:51

as his glasses go from very dark to...

0:39:510:39:54

-I just didn't want to go...

-..completely gone.

0:39:550:39:57

Proof that the director also needed specs.

0:39:570:40:00

We say a deathly hallow to Harry Potter and chums

0:40:020:40:06

in this lively scene where they're transported from a fiery tent...

0:40:060:40:10

to the safety of...

0:40:100:40:11

oncoming traffic.

0:40:110:40:14

But look again.

0:40:140:40:15

Harry's is on Hermione's left and Ron on her right.

0:40:150:40:20

But when they reappear, it's the other way round.

0:40:210:40:25

In this gory scene from the disappointing Little Fockers,

0:40:270:40:30

Ben Stiller slices straight through his finger,

0:40:300:40:34

making Bobby De Niro Bloody De Niro.

0:40:340:40:37

THEY ALL SCREAM

0:40:370:40:39

But there's blood on the right side of his face when earlier it was all over his left.

0:40:400:40:45

That's not just blood on your face, Bobby. There's egg on it too.

0:40:470:40:50

The Expendables, and Sly Stallone's got a gun ready to use

0:40:540:40:57

in an exciting escape from some bad men.

0:40:570:41:02

BRAKES SCREECH

0:41:020:41:03

I worry that these days Sly's mind is not what it used to be.

0:41:050:41:11

Look, he's forgotten that he should be holding the gun,

0:41:110:41:14

not having it in his belt.

0:41:140:41:15

But once Statham shouts the magic words, the gun's back...

0:41:150:41:20

for Sly to throw away.

0:41:200:41:21

A clever scene from Transformers

0:41:240:41:26

with real footage of President Nixon on the TV.

0:41:260:41:29

And they've carefully recreated the set to match it.

0:41:290:41:33

However, was it too much of a push to get a lamp?

0:41:330:41:37

It's here but not here.

0:41:370:41:40

No, that would've been a giant leap too far.

0:41:400:41:43

Fast paced sci-fi thrills in Limitless,

0:41:450:41:48

and for a man with no limits,

0:41:480:41:50

Bradley Cooper really struggles with the little things.

0:41:500:41:53

Like sitting down on a chair properly.

0:41:530:41:56

Oh, come on, don't cry. Look, the chair's back up again!

0:41:590:42:02

You can have another go!

0:42:020:42:04

My mother always used to say,

0:42:080:42:10

"Never fly-kick a man with a massive hammer in the face."

0:42:100:42:13

Sadly, Milla's mum didn't, which is bad news,

0:42:130:42:16

because this man is going to hit Milla with the massive hammer.

0:42:160:42:21

However, it's not all bad, because at least he hit her into a nice, soft bouncy wall.

0:42:210:42:27

See? Every hammer has a silver lining.

0:42:290:42:31

Now this girl's in pursuit.

0:42:350:42:38

She slides underneath, shooting him as she goes.

0:42:380:42:41

But wait.

0:42:410:42:43

Look, that hammer's going to land on her!

0:42:430:42:45

Phew. Saved by a continuity error.

0:42:450:42:49

MC Hammer snuffs it and she's not even there.

0:42:490:42:53

Adrenalin-pumping Fast Five now, and when robbing a bank,

0:42:580:43:02

attention to detail really counts.

0:43:020:43:05

Here the safe's unlocked with a right-hand print.

0:43:050:43:08

Young Mia then goes to extreme measures,

0:43:130:43:16

grabbing his print on her bikini.

0:43:160:43:18

But it's the left hand.

0:43:200:43:22

That shouldn't work, then. Caught you red-handed AND red-faced!

0:43:220:43:27

-So did he just slap that

-BLEEP

-or did he grab and hold onto it?

0:43:270:43:32

The only thing that keeps me on the edge of my seat more than

0:43:340:43:36

watching a good thriller is a really, really small seat.

0:43:360:43:40

I love a good thriller - it's my favourite genre of film.

0:43:400:43:43

It's also a Michael Jackson album title.

0:43:430:43:46

I also like films that are bad, dangerous or simply off the wall!

0:43:460:43:50

HE LAUGHS

0:43:500:43:53

Now the fraught and claustrophobic Buried.

0:43:560:44:00

Here, Ryan Reynolds unties his hands and removes the gag around his neck.

0:44:000:44:05

But then out of nowhere...

0:44:050:44:07

..the gag's back around his neck!

0:44:110:44:13

For a film full of gags, it's just not funny.

0:44:130:44:17

Now Ryan grabs a pen and writes with his left hand.

0:44:210:44:24

But when the shot changes, it's suddenly his right.

0:44:250:44:28

So as well as being a big Hollywood star, he's also ambidextrous!

0:44:280:44:32

Talk about buried talent!

0:44:330:44:36

It's the gripping and gritty film The Town.

0:44:400:44:43

The thing about towns nowadays is that businesses can change

0:44:430:44:47

so quickly, can't they?

0:44:470:44:49

Look at the bar across the road from this flower shop.

0:44:490:44:53

-It's called Fitzgerald's, right?

-I'm in.

0:44:550:44:57

I have this.

0:44:570:44:59

Well, not any more, because we see the bar is now called The Junction.

0:44:590:45:03

Sounds like a naff gastropub to me.

0:45:030:45:06

Matthew McConaughey in the solidly crafted Lincoln Lawyer.

0:45:080:45:13

-Get the hell out of my house.

-Take that, M Dog!

0:45:130:45:15

I told you my son didn't kill...

0:45:150:45:17

Lucky it was his left arm so he can shoot right back at her.

0:45:170:45:19

Oh, hang on, that's his right arm in the sling.

0:45:270:45:31

Sue the doctors for malpractice, Matthew,

0:45:310:45:34

and then get a better lawyer than yourself to represent you.

0:45:340:45:37

I thought I told you to be careful.

0:45:370:45:39

Onto the intriguing Adjustment Bureau

0:45:440:45:47

and Matt Damon has a phone in his coffee.

0:45:470:45:49

Personally I prefer milk and sugar.

0:45:490:45:51

-'You won't believe who I just ran into?'

-Who?

-'The girl from...'

0:45:510:45:54

But what's this? Moments later, he's talking on a different phone.

0:45:540:45:58

The one you kissed?

0:45:580:45:59

-However, keep watching as during the same conversation...

-Whatever, dude.

0:45:590:46:02

-It won't work again.

-..he's back on the BlackBerry.

0:46:020:46:06

And you didn't write it?

0:46:060:46:08

Now Matt's looking at an article so good they've printed it twice.

0:46:110:46:16

See, it's the same chunk of text here and here.

0:46:160:46:21

How lazy to just repeat the same thing over again.

0:46:210:46:24

How lazy to just repeat the same thing over again.

0:46:240:46:27

It's torturous suspense flick The Resident.

0:46:290:46:32

And weirdo Max has snuck into Juliet's bedroom to get some

0:46:320:46:35

kind of creepy thrill from not quite touching her.

0:46:350:46:38

However, the really odd bit is Juliet lying on her side...

0:46:400:46:44

then instantly she's on her back.

0:46:440:46:47

You've been out-weirded, Max!

0:46:470:46:49

Go back home and count your toenail clippings collection.

0:46:490:46:52

ALARM BEEPS

0:46:540:46:55

Oh, no! It's 8:27am and Juliet's overslept.

0:46:550:46:59

Hurry up, Juliet, get your trousers on. It's awful when you oversleep.

0:47:010:47:06

You just can't get your brain into gear.

0:47:060:47:08

And Juliet's not got her brain into gear as she's making a call

0:47:100:47:13

when her phone is clearly still locked.

0:47:130:47:16

I seriously overslept.

0:47:170:47:19

Now, an abysmal film,

0:47:230:47:25

The Roommate, where the roommates in question take a photo of themselves.

0:47:250:47:29

That shot will look great on the shared house wall.

0:47:290:47:32

Shame they get a different picture from the wrong angle then.

0:47:320:47:36

And if they can't agree on that, it'll be murder

0:47:360:47:39

when they do the cleaning rota.

0:47:390:47:41

It's the contrived mystery movie Unknown.

0:47:440:47:47

And here's an quick science lesson - what happens when you use something

0:47:470:47:52

that gives out an electric shock on something that's soaking wet?

0:47:520:47:55

A nasty electric shock for everyone concerned.

0:47:580:48:01

However, concern is not something these ambulance men seem to have.

0:48:010:48:06

In Unknown, Diane Kruger gets knocked unconscious with chloroform.

0:48:090:48:15

But when one of her eyes is opened to check she's out, the other one opens as well.

0:48:150:48:19

Blink and you'd miss it.

0:48:190:48:21

Wink and you'd be better for the part than Diane.

0:48:210:48:24

And now another movie storyline's faults are reviewed

0:48:270:48:30

and exposed in Great Plothole Mistakes.

0:48:300:48:33

In the exhausting action-packed thrill-fest

0:48:330:48:37

that is Raiders of the Lost Ark,

0:48:370:48:39

it's 1936 and celebrated archaeologist Dr Indiana Jones

0:48:390:48:43

is approached by army intelligence.

0:48:430:48:44

They tell him that Hitler's obsession with the occult has led him to seek the Ark of the Covenant,

0:48:440:48:49

a sacred relic containing the wrath of God.

0:48:490:48:52

In our version, Indy says, "Listen, guys, I just got back from Peru.

0:48:520:48:57

"I've been chased by a massive ball. I'm shattered.

0:48:570:49:00

"I've got lots of post to open, the garden's been neglected

0:49:000:49:03

"and this hat needs dry cleaning. I might give this one a miss."

0:49:030:49:06

"But the Ark of the Covenant, Dr Jones!" "Yeah, you know what?

0:49:060:49:09

"It won't make much difference whether I go or not."

0:49:090:49:13

So while Indy stays at home and gets his stuff sorted,

0:49:130:49:15

the Nazis get the Ark undisturbed,

0:49:150:49:19

transport it from Egypt all the way back to Berlin where

0:49:190:49:22

a triumphant Fuhrer pops the lid in front of his evil acolytes.

0:49:220:49:26

"Oh, goody!" And it melts his stupid face off, averting World War II.

0:49:260:49:31

Comedy now. People have a lot of theories about comedy.

0:49:350:49:39

They say tragedy plus time equals comedy.

0:49:390:49:42

But Bambi came out years ago and every time I watch it,

0:49:420:49:45

I bawl my eyes out. But then my mother was a dear.

0:49:450:49:48

They also say it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile.

0:49:480:49:52

No wonder I felt so exhausted watching Cheaper By The Dozen 2.

0:49:520:49:57

But most importantly, they say the secret of comedy is timing.

0:49:570:50:01

Knowing the exact moment to say something hilarious.

0:50:030:50:07

Actually, thinking about it, timing isn't quite as important as having something funny to say.

0:50:090:50:13

Sorry.

0:50:130:50:15

Junior Suite...

0:50:170:50:19

It's quirky and unusual Cedar Rapids where Tim is staying 112.

0:50:190:50:25

It's strange then that when Dean arrives, he says...

0:50:250:50:27

Double stock my minibar, please, 1019. Thank you.

0:50:270:50:32

Because, look, he's also staying in 112 with Tim and also Ronald.

0:50:320:50:36

Someone in 1019 is going to get a nice surprise.

0:50:360:50:40

Now notice all the climbers on the wall with Tim are securely

0:50:430:50:47

tied on with ropes and harnesses to avoid falling off.

0:50:470:50:52

Or suddenly inexplicably vanishing.

0:50:520:50:55

Low brow and proud of it, it's Hall Pass

0:50:580:51:01

and I do wish that that guy would stop flashing his chest about.

0:51:010:51:05

His shirt agrees and has taken it upon itself to button up.

0:51:050:51:09

It's one of those self-fastening shirts.

0:51:100:51:13

The trouble with those is that they've got a habit of...

0:51:130:51:17

-Yeah, it's unbuttoned again.

-I gotta get going.

0:51:170:51:20

We have a team meeting in 20 minutes.

0:51:200:51:22

Best do it up yourself, yeah, fella.

0:51:220:51:24

Sam Jackson and The Rock are wearing no ordinary medals

0:51:260:51:31

in this frantic comedy, The Other Guys, they're mood medals.

0:51:310:51:35

And we'd do it again and again.

0:51:350:51:37

They disappear when they get angry.

0:51:370:51:39

-If we want to hear you talk, I will shove my arm up your

-BLEEP

0:51:390:51:42

and work your mouth like a puppet! You hear me?! You hear me?

0:51:420:51:45

And reappear when they're happy again. See?

0:51:450:51:48

Either that or someone's been "medalling" - thanks - with the props.

0:51:480:51:52

A police officer must always know where his gun is.

0:51:560:52:00

However, Will Ferrell has forgotten his golden rule -

0:52:000:52:03

he's rolling around on top of it.

0:52:030:52:05

Only for it to return to his holster moments later.

0:52:070:52:11

Here, Will Ferrell is in a violent rage with Alan Partridge.

0:52:150:52:21

They say you can't reproduce truly great art,

0:52:210:52:23

but when Will takes this mediocre squiggle off the wall,

0:52:230:52:26

an exact reproduction immediately takes its place.

0:52:260:52:29

The very raw comedy Horrible Bosses.

0:52:320:52:35

Jamie Foxx is given a suitcase full of money.

0:52:360:52:40

Well, a bit of money.

0:52:400:52:41

Anyway, he'd best latch the suitcase all the same. Good man.

0:52:410:52:45

But spool forward a bit...

0:52:470:52:49

and the latches are undone again.

0:52:490:52:52

With all that cash, you'd think he'd be able to buy a better suitcase.

0:52:520:52:56

One of my favourites, Big Momma 3, with an angry woman

0:52:580:53:02

covered in white foam making a mess of the door.

0:53:020:53:05

-Never mind. Here's Big Momma's peerless acting skills.

-Me?!

0:53:070:53:10

-Well, thank you, sure.

-But who's cleaned up that door?

0:53:100:53:15

What a shame. This silly blunder ruins an otherwise perfect film(!)

0:53:150:53:20

Historical movies are a personal favourite of mine.

0:53:220:53:25

I often picture myself cast in a lavish version of a classic Jane Austen movie -

0:53:250:53:30

Mr Darcy in a drenched shirt, open to the waist,

0:53:300:53:32

climbing out of the water, whilst watching, in anticipation,

0:53:320:53:35

dressed in a gorgeous bodice, holding a parasol, there I am.

0:53:350:53:39

"Oh, Mr Darcy!" That's how I'd do it.

0:53:390:53:43

Oscar fodder with the classy remake of True Grit.

0:53:460:53:51

And times sure were tough in 19th-century Texas.

0:53:510:53:54

Unless, that is, you're the heroine Mattie Ross

0:53:540:53:57

and you have the amazing ability to go from soaking wet...

0:53:570:54:00

..to bone dry in ten seconds flat.

0:54:080:54:10

Consumer issues now and here,

0:54:140:54:16

Jeff Bridges shows his disgust with the corn bread

0:54:160:54:18

in his bargain bucket

0:54:180:54:20

by spilling them out of the bag and shooting them.

0:54:200:54:23

Luckily, it's Colonel Sanders' disappearing corn -

0:54:230:54:26

it's nowhere to be seen.

0:54:260:54:27

Well, he won't have to waste any more precious bullets.

0:54:310:54:33

A ropey gaff now. See that chap hanging around in the branches?

0:54:370:54:41

One minute he's top of the tree, next he's swinging a lot lower.

0:54:410:54:46

How Jeff Bridges doesn't twig, I'll never know.

0:54:460:54:49

Frivolous grave robbing jokery with Burke and Hare,

0:54:530:54:56

and here's Simon Pegg chatting up her off of Home & Away.

0:54:560:54:59

-When will I be able to see you again, Jenny?

-At the Lyceum Theatre.

0:54:590:55:04

-Really? When?

-When we put...

0:55:040:55:06

Maybe in 55 years' time, when the Lyceum Theatre is actually built.

0:55:060:55:10

-Goodnight, William.

-That's certainly one way to ditch a guy.

0:55:100:55:13

Burke and Hare are chopping down a tree to stop a coach.

0:55:190:55:22

And who's inside? Urgh!

0:55:240:55:27

If I saw a coach with Michael Winner inside, I wouldn't want to stop it.

0:55:270:55:31

But they've only made a tiny dent at chest height.

0:55:310:55:34

Come on, put your back into it!

0:55:340:55:36

However, this being the crazy world of true life drama, the entire tree comes tumbling down.

0:55:360:55:42

Uh-oh. The winner takes a fall.

0:55:420:55:45

-Hmm, that table looks a little bare.

-Lovely.

0:55:540:55:57

I know what's missing - she forgot the flowers.

0:55:580:56:02

Oh, there they are.

0:56:020:56:03

-Thank you.

-Bit of an odd side dish, though.

0:56:030:56:06

Here's BAFTA-winning actor Tom Wilkinson

0:56:110:56:13

unveiling my nominees for the best actor in the movie Burke and Hare.

0:56:130:56:17

But which corpse wins? None of them!

0:56:190:56:22

The award goes to the incredible moving blanket.

0:56:220:56:26

First the corpses are uncovered -

0:56:260:56:29

quick round of applause -

0:56:290:56:32

then one of them is covered up again.

0:56:320:56:34

A bravura performance!

0:56:350:56:38

Solving a crime, sir.

0:56:440:56:45

The cream of British talent drops some home-grown blunders here.

0:56:450:56:49

What on earth are you talking about?

0:56:490:56:52

There's Ronnie Corbett - not a mistake, he actually is that small.

0:56:520:56:55

I don't know what this little man is trying to prove.

0:56:550:56:59

-Stephen Merchant plays goldfish bowl holder 4.

-I want him removed.

0:56:590:57:03

-It is you, sir!

-And now Tim Curry, co-starring with his teeth.

0:57:030:57:07

But ignore them and watch his background. He steps forward.

0:57:100:57:13

But look, the background remains the same,

0:57:150:57:19

suggesting he didn't step forward at all.

0:57:190:57:22

We shall all have to pay the price.

0:57:220:57:24

And now Merchant's bowl has disappeared.

0:57:240:57:28

And to think he was chief bowl holder at the RSC. What an insult!

0:57:280:57:34

Rip-roaring Roman caper The Eagle now and this looks like such

0:57:370:57:41

an arduous journey it would give anyone a shock.

0:57:410:57:43

It certainly did to Jamie Bell's horse who overnight changes

0:57:450:57:49

colour from brown to white with no explanation.

0:57:490:57:53

The dark and brutal Killer Inside Me

0:57:550:57:57

starring Casey Affleck as a deputy sheriff-cum-homicidal maniac.

0:57:570:58:02

Ho-hum, you might think.

0:58:020:58:04

But I feel anguish and I'm sorry.

0:58:040:58:07

But look all of a sudden, he's clutching a thick wooden plank!

0:58:070:58:11

Superb uncredited cameo from his brother Ben.

0:58:110:58:15

When a film is described as "cultural,"

0:58:170:58:19

that probably means it hasn't got a good enough story to be popular,

0:58:190:58:23

so it's being passed off as art.

0:58:230:58:25

"Mm, yes, it's supposed to be boring! That's the point!"

0:58:250:58:28

You can explain away all kinds of things using the art house excuse.

0:58:280:58:32

Shaky cameras - it's art.

0:58:320:58:33

Gaping plot holes - it's art.

0:58:330:58:35

Pretentious acting - that's just Natalie Portman,

0:58:350:58:37

there's nothing we can do about that now.

0:58:370:58:40

Some films are pure entertainment.

0:58:400:58:42

Others go a little deeper and ask questions like, "Why are we here,

0:58:420:58:45

"in the cinema watching another M Night Shyamalan film?"

0:58:450:58:49

Natalie Portman's in need of a champagne top-up, I think,

0:58:510:58:54

in creepy ballet melodrama Black Swan.

0:58:540:58:57

..appreciated presence on our stage.

0:58:570:58:59

But being so freaked out by Winona Ryder giving her evils, none of us notice that,

0:58:590:59:04

by the end of the scene, the flute is full to the brim again.

0:59:040:59:07

To beauty.

0:59:070:59:09

Next up, here's It's Kind Of A Funny Story,

0:59:110:59:16

a One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest for Justin Bieber fans.

0:59:160:59:19

And suicidal Craig has to give up all potentially harmful items.

0:59:190:59:24

Your belt and shoelaces.

0:59:240:59:25

-So his belt and shoelaces are gone.

-We can't take chances.

0:59:250:59:30

But later on, Craig and another patient Bobby are shooting hoops

0:59:310:59:35

with draw-stringed trackie bottoms

0:59:350:59:37

and very laced-up shoes. That basket ball's probably

0:59:370:59:41

-a cyanide gobstopper.

-Don't play dumb with me.

0:59:410:59:45

Now, slow-moving alien thriller Monsters and our couple's being

0:59:470:59:51

fleeced by a man who'd get Anne Robinson frothing at the mouth.

0:59:510:59:55

Um, how much?

0:59:550:59:56

That will be 5,000 colones.

0:59:560:59:59

-5,000?

-Yeah, 5,000.

-So that's 5,000 Costa Rican colones.

0:59:591:00:03

That will be 5,000 colonies.

1:00:031:00:05

-5,000?

-Yeah, yeah, 5,000.

1:00:051:00:08

-5,000 is a lot of money.

-Yes, I know, but...

1:00:081:00:11

Oh, it's now 5,000? Big mistake.

1:00:111:00:14

At the current exchange rate, 5,000 is...

1:00:141:00:17

No wonder this film had no cash for the special effects.

1:00:211:00:25

Monsters again and this completely deserted town

1:00:281:00:32

isn't quite as deserted as it seems.

1:00:321:00:35

Now, before you cower behind the sofa, take another look.

1:00:351:00:38

It seems the ali-ons prefer pick-up trucks to spaceships

1:00:411:00:43

when they pop to the shop for a pint of milk and a family-sized Galaxy.

1:00:431:00:49

Here's feisty teen Ree in gritty drama Winter's Bone.

1:00:511:00:56

This confrontation looks like

1:00:561:00:58

it'll get pretty tense as the gloves are well and truly off.

1:00:581:01:01

No, hang on, they're back on again.

1:01:021:01:05

Phew, looks like all will be fine after all.

1:01:081:01:12

No, wait, they're off again! Oh, make your mind up, love.

1:01:131:01:16

So often with films, the stars get the awards,

1:01:181:01:21

but what about those people behind the scenes? How do they get noticed?

1:01:211:01:25

They could become the best in their field or work their way up to become a famous director.

1:01:251:01:29

Or they could just stand in the back of shot.

1:01:291:01:31

Well, that's exactly what we're awarding now -

1:01:311:01:34

those people who went that extra distance

1:01:341:01:36

from out-of-shot to into shot.

1:01:361:01:38

What?

1:01:401:01:42

It's the Great Movie Mistakes Award for Best Supporting Actor,

1:01:441:01:47

and here are the nominations.

1:01:471:01:50

Lightweight action from Knight And Day and some great scene stealing.

1:01:501:01:54

Look at the security guards behind Cameron Diaz.

1:01:541:01:57

They suddenly change into normal civilians

1:02:001:02:03

and then back into security guards at the top of the escalator.

1:02:031:02:08

Maybe they were just working undercover for a bit.

1:02:091:02:12

If you've got a problem, maybe you can hire The A-Team,

1:02:171:02:21

to clean your windows, because...

1:02:211:02:23

Let's go back.

1:02:231:02:26

Mr T has got that window so clean,

1:02:261:02:28

you can see the cameraman's own reflection in it.

1:02:281:02:31

A blatant and unwelcome cameo. A bit like the movie.

1:02:331:02:37

In seen-it-all-before thriller The Resident,

1:02:401:02:44

Jack returns to his flat and senses all is not right.

1:02:441:02:48

If it the presence of a ghostly character?

1:02:481:02:51

Or just the reflection of the clumsy cameraman in his kitchen window?

1:02:511:02:56

Time to move out, if you ask me, Jack.

1:02:561:02:59

Who are you texting?

1:03:011:03:03

It's crazy horror comedy Vampires Suck

1:03:031:03:06

and Alice gets a mobile phone right in the face.

1:03:061:03:09

Now, either Edward is a very good shot or someone just off camera

1:03:091:03:15

is throwing a mobile phone right in her face.

1:03:151:03:17

There, thrown from point-blank range.

1:03:191:03:22

That's a bit "phoney"!

1:03:221:03:24

But the winner is Man In Shorts.

1:03:281:03:31

It's the climax of the testosterone-dripping Expendables

1:03:311:03:36

and all hell is breaking loose.

1:03:361:03:38

Everyone's running for their lives,

1:03:381:03:40

but hold on, who's this fellow in Bermuda shorts with the camcorder?

1:03:401:03:44

A very unfortunate tourist?

1:03:441:03:48

Next year, I'd stick to Rhyl. There's fewer explosions.

1:03:481:03:51

Science fiction. So much more popular

1:03:531:03:56

than its boring older brother, science fact.

1:03:561:03:58

My favourite type of sci-fi used to be films set in dystopian futures,

1:03:581:04:02

which portrayed a world dominated by technology, totalitarian governments

1:04:021:04:06

and the collapse of society as we know it. But nowadays,

1:04:061:04:09

I can get exactly the same thing just by watching the news.

1:04:091:04:13

The baffling Inception now.

1:04:151:04:17

I think this film's about the new sport extreme sleeping,

1:04:171:04:20

where people have to sleep through anything.

1:04:201:04:23

Here, they listen to boring music to drift away.

1:04:231:04:27

Ah, yes, the falling off the bridge event - very tricky -

1:04:291:04:33

especially if your headphones have come off.

1:04:331:04:36

What's he going to do now?

1:04:361:04:38

Without Coldplay's greatest hits playing, he'll surely wake up.

1:04:381:04:41

Oh, phew, they're back on. And he's ready to be plunged into the river.

1:04:411:04:46

In this clip, we see Cillian Murphy get shot once in the chest.

1:04:481:04:53

But when they come to help him, there are two bullet wounds.

1:04:561:05:01

Well, as the saying goes, shoot me once, shame on you.

1:05:011:05:04

Shoot me twice, shame on the continuity guy.

1:05:041:05:08

Next up, Battle: Los Angeles. A film that focuses too much on the action

1:05:101:05:15

and not enough on the dialogue.

1:05:151:05:17

Here, the soldiers prefer to bark rather than talk.

1:05:171:05:20

-HE SLURS: Right, we're up.

-What's that,

1:05:201:05:23

Lassie(?) In this scene, the aliens are on the run and Aaron Eckhart is

1:05:251:05:29

trying to choose which gun goes best with his outfit.

1:05:291:05:32

Pistol? Yeah, pistol.

1:05:351:05:37

Or machine gun? No, pistol, gotta be pistol.

1:05:391:05:43

Taut, exciting thrills from Source Code now.

1:05:471:05:50

And this is Jake Can't-Pronounce-His-Last-Name

1:05:501:05:53

swiping a wallet to check out a driver's licence.

1:05:531:05:57

-You have the bomber's name?

-Derek Frost.

1:05:591:06:02

Yes, that's the only thing he has,

1:06:021:06:04

because all the other details are completely different.

1:06:041:06:07

Look - address, date of birth, height. All of it!

1:06:071:06:12

Next up, the vile chiller Splice, and we see Adrian Brody doing...

1:06:151:06:21

-BELT RATTLES

-Well, yeah, never mind that.

1:06:211:06:24

Watch Sarah Polley. Look, she's left the door open.

1:06:241:06:28

But then she opens the already-open door.

1:06:291:06:32

Nearly as strange as what Brody was up to.

1:06:321:06:35

Take a look at the Splice girl's dress.

1:06:381:06:42

Because, hanging upside down, you would imagine

1:06:441:06:47

it would fall down around her shoulders.

1:06:471:06:50

Sporty AND Scary Splice!

1:06:531:06:56

Films about true life next.

1:07:001:07:03

Films like 127 Hours, a true story of a man stuck in a canyon for days.

1:07:031:07:08

I got stuck on the M25 for what felt like 127 hours once.

1:07:081:07:12

I didn't chop off my own arm, did I? No, I did not!

1:07:121:07:15

I did, however, wee in a Coke bottle,

1:07:151:07:18

eat a family bag of Wotsits and openly cry,

1:07:181:07:21

but apparently, that story's not Hollywood material!

1:07:211:07:24

Tch!

1:07:241:07:26

It's super nerd Mark Zuckerberg, although he can't be that nerdy.

1:07:281:07:33

He's mates with Justin Timberlake.

1:07:331:07:35

Oh, good catch, Justin.

1:07:351:07:37

Sharon?

1:07:381:07:39

SMASH!

1:07:391:07:40

-Oh, no!

-I'm so sorry!

-Mark!

1:07:401:07:43

-Girls can't catch!

-Here you go.

-No, wait!

1:07:431:07:46

Luckily, it was one of those completely empty beer bottles

1:07:471:07:50

kept for situations like this.

1:07:501:07:53

-I'm so sorry.

-Look, no stain on the wall.

1:07:541:07:57

Or maybe Zuckerberg's so rich,

1:07:571:07:59

he can afford beer that tidies up after itself.

1:07:591:08:02

Here's sweaty Christian Bale in the honest and hard-edged The Fighter.

1:08:051:08:09

Look at his T-shirt. Drenched!

1:08:111:08:13

But after a long walk in the sun, the sweat seems to have disappeared.

1:08:171:08:20

What's his antiperspirant?

1:08:221:08:24

Not one with 24-hour protection, as he's drenched again.

1:08:271:08:30

Look at Mark Wahlberg's fit bod as Micky Ward in The Fighter.

1:08:331:08:37

Not a tattoo in sight.

1:08:371:08:39

But cut to him in bed and what's this?

1:08:391:08:43

It's Mark's tat of Bob Marley, which Micky never had in real life.

1:08:431:08:48

Eddy Grant on the inner thigh, though? That's a possibility.

1:08:481:08:52

A young John Lennon with his nasal singing voice

1:08:541:08:57

in the unsentimental Nose-where Boy.

1:08:571:09:00

-Sorry, Nowhere Boy.

-# You're my little girl! #

1:09:001:09:04

But when he stops singing, we see the tape is at the start of the reel

1:09:041:09:07

and the song couldn't have been recorded.

1:09:071:09:10

Which is lucky, as it sounded horrific.

1:09:111:09:14

We had great success...

1:09:161:09:18

A scene from the so-called documentary I'm Still Here

1:09:181:09:22

and look at the glasses hanging off the shirt of Joaquin Phoenix

1:09:221:09:26

or whatever he's called.

1:09:261:09:28

-Look, they've vanished.

-I have a little studio, d'you know?

1:09:281:09:32

Puffy Combs, or whatever he's called, doesn't notice.

1:09:321:09:35

I'm excited to hear this stuff. I want to hear if you...

1:09:351:09:38

And now they're back. Mo sunglasses, mo problems.

1:09:381:09:43

More than seven square miles...

1:09:451:09:47

Harsh realities from Made In Dagenham now,

1:09:471:09:50

a British film harping back to the glorious era

1:09:501:09:53

where 55,000 men worked in a car factory with only 187 women.

1:09:531:09:58

That's because the men knew they were talking about back then.

1:09:581:10:01

-Are you threatening me?

-Let's listen.

1:10:011:10:04

I'm trying to stop 40,000 people from losing their jobs, Mrs Castle.

1:10:041:10:07

That's how many people work as Ford employees in this country, not to mention...

1:10:071:10:11

I thought it was 55,000, you berk? Let the women take over, I say.

1:10:111:10:16

It's raining in Dagenham.

1:10:191:10:21

Look at that poor old guy outside with his brolly.

1:10:211:10:24

He can't wait to get inside in the dry.

1:10:241:10:26

I'm lucky you weren't getting the lads to hold out for a full house.

1:10:261:10:29

Get yourself home, man!

1:10:291:10:31

All over the country...

1:10:311:10:33

Later on and now he must be somewhere nice and warm.

1:10:331:10:36

Oh, no, no. There he is again. Maybe he likes the rain.

1:10:361:10:40

You'll always be fighting over the scraps on the top table...

1:10:401:10:43

And again.

1:10:431:10:45

Get equal pay, yeah.

1:10:451:10:46

And again.

1:10:481:10:50

He just can't get enough of it. Get inside, man, you'll catch your death!

1:10:501:10:53

What I don't get is why it's so important to you.

1:10:531:10:57

Compelling drama from Conviction and Kenny's been freed from jail,

1:11:001:11:04

but maybe he should be banged straight up again for crimes against continuity.

1:11:041:11:08

-His offences are many. No hat, your honour.

-Will you thank your sister?

1:11:081:11:12

And now, a hat.

1:11:121:11:14

-Holding his scarf, your honour.

-Is this for us?

-Yes, it's for you.

1:11:161:11:20

And now suddenly wearing it again. The prosecution rests.

1:11:201:11:25

Next up, we're looking at teen movies,

1:11:271:11:30

which, for a man only recently out of his teens - that's right - is exactly my thing.

1:11:301:11:34

-MOBILE PHONE RINGS

-They're cool, wicked and totally radical. Oh, excuse me.

1:11:341:11:39

Oh, hey, Dazza! Yeah? What's up, dude?

1:11:391:11:42

Yeah, I would love to come down the Rec and skateboard with you.

1:11:421:11:46

Hang on. Mum, I'm going down the Rec with Dazza.

1:11:461:11:49

-HIGH-PITCHED VOICE:

-Not until you've finished hosting the show.

1:11:491:11:52

But, Mum!

1:11:521:11:54

-No buts.

-I can't come out. See you tomoz.

1:11:541:11:58

Here are some classic goofs from teen films.

1:12:001:12:03

-Say it nicely!

-Here are some classic goofs from teen films.

1:12:031:12:07

I saw that!

1:12:091:12:11

Next, in the light-hearted Easy A, Olive shows this boy what's what

1:12:141:12:18

by crushing an ice-cream cone in front of his face.

1:12:181:12:22

But the cone instantly reappears. Here today, cone tomorrow.

1:12:221:12:27

Now, watch Olive trying to take off her left boot

1:12:311:12:33

Is that lavender? It's pretty.

1:12:331:12:36

Which becomes her right boot, then she takes off her right boot again,

1:12:361:12:40

but somehow she's removed both her boots!

1:12:401:12:43

A clear example of two rights making a wrong.

1:12:431:12:47

In energetic Step Up 3D, it's the dance battle.

1:12:501:12:53

And as any B-boy knows, things get hot on the dance floor,

1:12:531:12:58

which is why the guy who's with those men pretending to be dogs

1:12:581:13:01

keeps taking his coat off.

1:13:011:13:03

Now you see it...

1:13:051:13:06

Now you don't.

1:13:061:13:08

Reminds me of my Nan's 80th. That was a lively affair.

1:13:081:13:12

Another one from Step Up, and take a look at Moose's bag,

1:13:151:13:19

because it's only on in the shots from behind.

1:13:191:13:22

Yeah, I mean I...

1:13:221:13:24

I'm a double major

1:13:241:13:25

Now, I know it's a backpack,

1:13:251:13:27

but you'd still see the strap on the front, right?

1:13:271:13:29

Yes?

1:13:291:13:30

What do you mean, you can't believe it?

1:13:301:13:33

It's Submarine, a reflective film about a son

1:13:351:13:38

trying to smooth out the creases in his parents' relationship.

1:13:381:13:42

And by the looks of things,

1:13:441:13:45

he's also smoothing out the creases in this drawing.

1:13:451:13:49

See? The fold's gone.

1:13:491:13:51

No need to set it on fire, though!

1:13:511:13:54

Oh! Kids!

1:13:541:13:56

Finally, a flashback scene in the worthless Twilight sequel, Eclipse.

1:13:591:14:03

Now, clothes in those days were made to last.

1:14:031:14:08

Look at that!

1:14:081:14:10

She stabs right through her dress and it doesn't even rip.

1:14:101:14:13

You don't get that kind of quality at Primark, do you?

1:14:131:14:16

And now another film's storyline flaws are reviewed and exposed

1:14:181:14:22

in Great Plot Hole Mistakes.

1:14:221:14:24

M Night Shyamalamadingdong's outlandish and far-fetched

1:14:241:14:27

2002 film Signs stars Mel Gibson

1:14:271:14:30

as a man who finds crop circles in his field which, it turns out,

1:14:301:14:34

is the work of ali-ons.

1:14:341:14:36

They've chosen to invade Earth for reasons that are mainly explained in crop circles,

1:14:361:14:40

which we can't understand.

1:14:401:14:41

Fortunately, the one substance able to destroy the ali-ons is water,

1:14:411:14:46

so they're fairly easily defeated. The End.

1:14:461:14:48

So what made the water-fearing ali-ons choose planet Earth, you might wonder?

1:14:481:14:53

-Just a minute, Lionel, did you say Planet Earth?

-That's right.

1:14:531:14:57

But 71% of the earth's surface is water, which is lethal to us ali-ons.

1:14:571:15:02

Yes.

1:15:021:15:03

What about Mars? That's nice and dry.

1:15:031:15:06

There hasn't been water on Mars for ages.

1:15:061:15:08

Yes, but where's the challenge in that? Come on.

1:15:081:15:12

Are you an ali-on or a mouse?

1:15:121:15:14

OK, OK.

1:15:141:15:15

So, we go to one of the dry bits of Earth, like the Atacama Desert?

1:15:151:15:19

No, we go to nice verdant farming country

1:15:191:15:22

and choose specifically the house of a family of water-filled humans

1:15:221:15:25

whose daughter has a strange obsession with water.

1:15:251:15:28

But we'll be wearing protective waterproof clothing, yes?

1:15:281:15:32

No, I thought we'd go naked.

1:15:321:15:33

Naked?! What if they spit at us?

1:15:331:15:36

I don't know about you, but when I'm crowing over puny humans,

1:15:361:15:39

I like to have my guys out, swinging in the breeze.

1:15:391:15:43

I'm worried this might be the worst idea you've ever had, Lionel.

1:15:431:15:47

No, that was instant mashed potato.

1:15:471:15:49

THEY LAUGH

1:15:491:15:52

Why does Hollywood love remakes so much?

1:15:541:15:57

Well, sometimes a film is so close to being brilliant

1:15:571:16:00

but there's just one tiny thing that stops it being perfect,

1:16:001:16:03

like it's foreign, or it was made over ten years ago.

1:16:031:16:06

Things that stop anyone in their right mind wanting to watch it.

1:16:061:16:09

The other reason to remake a movie is if the original didn't quite get it right.

1:16:091:16:13

Who didn't think that Get Carter was improved by the addition of Sylvester Stallone?

1:16:131:16:18

Or that The Italian Job was crying out for a cameo by Marky Mark?

1:16:181:16:21

I, for one, can't wait for next year's summer blockbuster,

1:16:211:16:24

Citizen Kane...

1:16:241:16:25

with Miley Cyrus.

1:16:251:16:27

Mm.

1:16:271:16:28

The needless, over-the-top A-Team movie,

1:16:301:16:34

and maybe they should give up this soldiers-of-fortune malarkey

1:16:341:16:37

and become baggage handlers. Watch the case by the side of BA.

1:16:371:16:41

I want to kill you, man.

1:16:411:16:43

You're not going to kill me! I'm going to kill YOU!

1:16:431:16:45

It's now behind his head...

1:16:451:16:47

I got two guns here.

1:16:471:16:49

..then on the other side.

1:16:501:16:53

It moves around more than Hannibal's wig did in the old series.

1:16:531:16:56

Whoopsie!

1:16:561:16:57

Loyal fans of The A-Team had problems with the remake,

1:16:591:17:03

and this must have got their blood boiling.

1:17:031:17:06

Look, they've mis-spelled Murdock's name!

1:17:061:17:08

It's D-O-C-K, not D-O-C-H.

1:17:081:17:11

I pity the fool who made that mistake.

1:17:111:17:15

Saying that, I also pity the person

1:17:151:17:17

who still cares so much about The A-Team.

1:17:171:17:20

At the end of the instantly forgettable Mechanic remake,

1:17:241:17:27

Ben Foster selects a jazz record to play on the posh turntable.

1:17:271:17:32

Ah! I love a bit of free form experimental jazz.

1:17:321:17:35

CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS

1:17:351:17:40

Hang on! It's ruddy Shubert's Trio Number Two!

1:17:401:17:43

But it definitely says "Jazz" on the cover.

1:17:441:17:49

Right, back to HMV.

1:17:491:17:51

Gulliver's Travels with Jack Black,

1:17:531:17:56

perfect casting, as the book was all about a loveable,

1:17:561:17:59

immature, rock-loving idiot.

1:17:591:18:00

Cos he called it a "mandate", so...

1:18:001:18:02

The kind of character that doesn't know his right hand from his left.

1:18:021:18:05

-..bushy-tailed for the boys.

-The right...

1:18:051:18:07

Now the left.

1:18:071:18:10

Jonathan Swift can rest easy that his work is in safe,

1:18:101:18:13

but confused hands.

1:18:131:18:15

We just got here.

1:18:151:18:16

In the final scene, Gulliver returns from his travels

1:18:181:18:21

and gains this girlfriend.

1:18:211:18:24

When I returned from my travels, all I gained was a case of the trots.

1:18:241:18:28

But what has she got to hide?

1:18:281:18:31

Her ID is the wrong way round,

1:18:311:18:33

Danke schon.

1:18:331:18:34

then it flips...

1:18:341:18:36

Mark. I'm just the new guy in the mailroom...

1:18:361:18:39

Now it's hidden again. Hm...mysterious.

1:18:391:18:43

Some films just don't know when to quit making mistakes.

1:18:451:18:48

In the end credits for Gulliver's Travels,

1:18:481:18:51

check out the date on this newspaper.

1:18:511:18:54

June 20th to June 3rd?

1:18:541:18:56

Someone obviously feels like time was moving backwards

1:18:561:18:59

when they were watching this film. I didn't.

1:18:591:19:02

Off to Jellystone Park for the charmless Yogi Bear movie.

1:19:041:19:09

Booboo has handcuffed Yogi to a tree.

1:19:091:19:12

But keep an eye on which paw the handcuff is on.

1:19:121:19:15

First it's his right paw,

1:19:161:19:19

then it's his left paw,

1:19:191:19:21

then his right paw again.

1:19:211:19:24

Either way, it's very PAW indeed.

1:19:241:19:26

Hello and welcome to Pointless View,

1:19:331:19:35

the programme where you have the chance to blow off about the things that really ruin films for you.

1:19:351:19:40

You know how it is.

1:19:401:19:41

It's impossible to follow a story if a flag's upside down, isn't it?

1:19:411:19:44

I personally had Braveheart ruined for me by an errant tartan

1:19:441:19:48

and Mel Gibson not being a blue 13th-century Scotsman,

1:19:481:19:51

but a brownish 20th-century Australian.

1:19:511:19:54

Here's a letter from Zorro Madeley of Funningham.

1:19:541:19:58

How was I expected to enjoy the wizardry-pokery of Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows

1:19:581:20:02

when it featured a bus bound for Dartford, to the south,

1:20:021:20:05

seen taking the tunnel north,

1:20:051:20:07

even though southbound traffic takes the bridge?

1:20:071:20:10

There hasn't been a southbound tunnel at Dartford since 1991.

1:20:101:20:13

From that point on, I felt it impossible

1:20:131:20:15

to believe in the enchanted chosen one of Hogwarts.

1:20:151:20:18

I'm not an idiot.

1:20:181:20:19

Precious Haystacks of Bumley says this.

1:20:191:20:23

In the so-called King's Speech,

1:20:231:20:25

the eponymous King's eponymous speech is enjoyed live

1:20:251:20:30

by a group of factory workers. It was broadcast at six pm on a Sunday,

1:20:301:20:35

so the only factory operating at such a time in a Christian country like Great Britain

1:20:351:20:39

would have been one run by Satan.

1:20:391:20:42

Am I to believe that our King would broadcast to the minions of hell?

1:20:421:20:47

I'm not an idiot.

1:20:471:20:48

Wing Commander Flava Tebbit is exercised by the shape of melted sand.

1:20:481:20:52

As someone who only watches films for the glassware in them,

1:20:521:20:56

I was enraged by the John Lennon biopic Nowhere Boy,

1:20:561:21:00

in which the Beatle-to-be is seen drinking from a nonic pint glass,

1:21:001:21:04

a type not invented until nearly three years after the scene was set.

1:21:041:21:09

I'm not a man given to tears, but I cried for nearly a fortnight,

1:21:091:21:14

and am now taking medicine.

1:21:141:21:16

I'm not an idiot.

1:21:161:21:18

I'm glad to hear it, Wing Commander.

1:21:181:21:20

A Mr Puff Diddy Hamilton of Underdunderden says...

1:21:201:21:22

I'm known for my sense of humour, and have laughed twice,

1:21:221:21:26

but I failed to see the joke in Drive Angry,

1:21:261:21:28

when a hydrogen truck is shown

1:21:281:21:30

labelled with a hazardous material placard bearing the number 1075.

1:21:301:21:34

1075, as any film buff knows, is the UN number for propane.

1:21:341:21:38

Hydrogen is in the range 1048-1053,

1:21:381:21:40

and I shall be returning the director's pretty young wife

1:21:401:21:44

to him piece by piece until this is corrected.

1:21:441:21:46

I'm not an idiot.

1:21:461:21:48

Blind Lemon Palmer-Tomkinson of Walton-on-Toast is even more forthright.

1:21:481:21:52

In the Kate Hudson film A Little Bit Of Heaven,

1:21:521:21:56

one of the characters calls a radio station to enter a competition.

1:21:561:21:59

My enjoyment was quite ruined by the absence of a squeal of feedback,

1:21:591:22:04

such as would have been heard.

1:22:041:22:05

-Hello?

-'Who is this?'

-Marley Corbett. Did I win?

1:22:051:22:10

I'm sure plenty of people would have liked to hear a howl of interference

1:22:101:22:14

and painful high-pitched whistling in this otherwise rather quiet film.

1:22:141:22:19

I'm not an idiot.

1:22:191:22:20

Pontius Bon Jovi of Gloveswold has a bee in his ointment

1:22:201:22:24

about the Anne Hathaway film Love And Other Drugs.

1:22:241:22:27

Jake Gyllenhaaaal's character is seen to be using an iMac

1:22:271:22:31

attached to an Apple Pro Mouse in what's supposed to be 1996.

1:22:311:22:35

But the Pro wasn't available until 2000.

1:22:351:22:38

To my disappointment, this time-travelling subplot wasn't picked up on anywhere in the film.

1:22:381:22:43

Perhaps the makers were worried that

1:22:431:22:45

if Jake Gyllenhaaaal were able to travel four years into the future,

1:22:451:22:49

it would ruin the will-they, won't-they romance.

1:22:491:22:51

I was sick in my mouth and someone else's and went home.

1:22:511:22:54

I'm not an idiot.

1:22:541:22:55

But it's not all bad news.

1:22:551:22:58

This letter is from Seven Zark Mountbatten of The Isle Of Teeth.

1:22:581:23:01

I usually enjoy the films of Angelina Jolie,

1:23:011:23:04

who is a beautiful and striking woman.

1:23:041:23:06

But in Salt, her character's name was Chenkov, a Russian male surname.

1:23:061:23:10

The female version would, of course, be Chenkova.

1:23:101:23:13

As a result of this error, I have become homosexual,

1:23:131:23:15

a consequence both unexpected and fabulous.

1:23:151:23:18

I'm not an idiot.

1:23:181:23:19

A satisfied customer? Good night.

1:23:191:23:22

For a shoot to be successful, the whole team,

1:23:271:23:30

including those behind the camera, have to be at the top of their game.

1:23:301:23:33

Every member of the crew has a vital part to play, and must never lose concentration.

1:23:331:23:37

For example, if the focus puller loses focus,

1:23:371:23:40

then there will be a loss of focus because the focus puller lost focus.

1:23:401:23:44

That's not a great example, but you know what I mean.

1:23:441:23:46

Everyone has an important job to do, from the soundman to the editor,

1:23:461:23:50

right down to the runner who brings the star his coffee.

1:23:501:23:54

Argh! What the hell?! I asked for a soy latte with an extra shot!

1:23:541:23:59

That didn't have an extra shot! What the hell were you thinking?

1:23:591:24:02

Sorry.

1:24:021:24:03

Here are some absolute clangers that happened purely because

1:24:031:24:06

the crew weren't paying enough attention.

1:24:061:24:09

Standing there crying isn't going to bring me the right coffee, is it?

1:24:091:24:12

Boo hoo hoo!

1:24:121:24:13

Get him out of here.

1:24:131:24:15

Relentless action in The Tourist,

1:24:181:24:20

where Angelina, in France, imaginatively orders a croissant.

1:24:201:24:24

But, zut alors! She's actually been brought a pain au chocolat.

1:24:311:24:35

Look how angry she is! She's set fire to her menu!

1:24:361:24:40

Over in Venice now

1:24:421:24:44

and a handcuffed Johnny Depp is determined to earn his title

1:24:441:24:47

as The Tourist.

1:24:471:24:48

Look, he's going water skiing.

1:24:501:24:53

Rubbish, isn't he?

1:24:531:24:54

Oh, well, he's still handcuffed, so that'll restrict him.

1:24:541:24:58

Ah, apparently not.

1:25:001:25:03

He's pulling himself along quite easily there as if he's not handcuffed at all.

1:25:031:25:08

And if that's not enough, look!

1:25:081:25:11

There's a camera operator in the boat, too.

1:25:131:25:17

Phew, what a holiday this is turning out to be!

1:25:171:25:19

In Venice, they have taxi boats! Look, here's the taxi sign.

1:25:211:25:26

And as if having to get used to a boat that's also a taxi's not enough,

1:25:271:25:31

this taxi boat confuses us even more

1:25:311:25:34

by continuing to lose and then gain its taxi sign.

1:25:341:25:38

Here it's just a boat.

1:25:391:25:41

Now it's a taxi again.

1:25:431:25:45

Taxi for the editor?

1:25:451:25:46

I think so.

1:25:461:25:48

Agent Denise, Clifton Ward.

1:25:481:25:50

-You guys want anything?

-Pretzels, all right?

-Yeah.

1:25:521:25:56

It's the ice hockey!

1:25:561:25:58

But sadly, as this is The Dilemma,

1:25:581:26:01

we have to watch Vince Vaughan confront Winona Ryder about an alleged affair.

1:26:011:26:05

Boring!

1:26:051:26:06

Hey.

1:26:061:26:08

Well, at least the game's on the tellies, there.

1:26:091:26:12

But look closely and you see that the Chicago Blackhawks

1:26:121:26:15

are in different kit to the live game they were just playing.

1:26:151:26:19

What the puck?!

1:26:191:26:20

Vince Vaughan is back home empty handed. See? Nothing in his hands.

1:26:241:26:29

But his friends and family have arranged an intervention.

1:26:291:26:32

I guess we can start.

1:26:321:26:35

Ronnie, why don't you come join us?

1:26:351:26:37

They think he has a drink problem. Maybe they have a point.

1:26:371:26:39

Your family and friends are here because they love you, Ronald,

1:26:391:26:43

and they can't stand to see you destroy yourself any more.

1:26:431:26:46

Look! Next time we see his hands, a brown paper bag has appeared.

1:26:461:26:50

I bet it's full of booze.

1:26:501:26:53

It's violent crime flick Blitz,

1:26:561:26:58

and Jason Statham finds it hilarious

1:26:581:27:00

that the beer in his glass keeps changing levels.

1:27:001:27:03

Stop laughing, Jason, it's not big and it's not clever.

1:27:081:27:12

Though, I'd never say that to his face.

1:27:121:27:15

-Yes.

-Shouldn't we promote one of our own?

1:27:171:27:19

Read all about it! Time travelling tabloid appears in the movie Blitz.

1:27:191:27:23

Superintendent Brown holds up a paper

1:27:231:27:25

where it's announced that a second cop has been shot.

1:27:251:27:28

Only a second cop hasn't been shot yet.

1:27:281:27:32

But when he is, look, the chief is reading the same paper.

1:27:321:27:37

What a scoop!

1:27:371:27:39

I wanted to say really quick that...

1:27:421:27:44

Sure-fire comedy hit Bridesmaids,

1:27:441:27:46

and Annie's tipsy and making a toast. That's never good.

1:27:461:27:49

I'd get confused and speak into the champagne flute

1:27:491:27:52

while taking sips from the microphone.

1:27:521:27:54

..helped shape who I am. I just want to thank you.

1:27:541:27:57

Oh, it seems Annie was having the same thought. They've swapped over.

1:27:571:28:01

-All right, let's see what's next. Another one.

-Yeah.

1:28:031:28:07

I know who this is from.

1:28:071:28:09

Take a look at Megan's right hand.

1:28:091:28:11

The poor little treasure's been injured all film.

1:28:111:28:15

She should never have to work again.

1:28:151:28:17

Very good time in high school.

1:28:171:28:19

Hold on, the support's on her left hand now. She's not injured at all.

1:28:191:28:23

Benefit cheat!

1:28:231:28:25

Burn her!

1:28:251:28:27

Sure, horror movies are scary,

1:28:291:28:31

but are they scarier than things that happen in real life?

1:28:311:28:34

I've yet to see anything in a film that makes me jump more than

1:28:341:28:37

when you wake up and find you've slept through an alarm.

1:28:371:28:40

Sure, bad things happen to people in the Saw films,

1:28:401:28:43

but nothing as bad as accidentally calling your girlfriend by your ex-girlfriend's name.

1:28:431:28:47

Now that is terrifying. I love watching horror films,

1:28:471:28:50

but the atmosphere's got to be just right.

1:28:501:28:52

What I do is I light some candles and place them around the room

1:28:521:28:55

then put on some scary music before it starts, to get in the mood.

1:28:551:28:59

I pull the duvet over my head and then I'm thrown out the cinema.

1:28:591:29:03

It's the flat and pointless remake of I Spit On Your Grave.

1:29:051:29:09

Watch this video tape because it keeps changing position.

1:29:091:29:13

To my what?

1:29:151:29:16

This scene reminds me of my dad trying to work the video.

1:29:161:29:20

-Dad, you've put it the wrong way round.

-What's on the tape?

1:29:201:29:25

-Is this some kind of

-BLEEP

-up joke? I'll smash the damn thing myself.

1:29:251:29:28

Dad, not that way either.

1:29:281:29:30

Any second, I expect this film to be wiped over with the snooker.

1:29:301:29:35

This is a shot he plays well.

1:29:351:29:37

Case 39 creates a self of menace and unease right from the start.

1:29:411:29:46

Don't believe me? Look at Renee Zellweger's car window.

1:29:461:29:50

First it's down.

1:29:501:29:52

Then it's up.

1:29:521:29:54

What malevolent force could be at work here?

1:29:541:29:57

The force of not paying attention, I wager. Hmm?

1:29:571:30:01

Another cock-up from case 39. Watch the knife as she takes it out.

1:30:041:30:09

In a second shot, it's much bigger.

1:30:111:30:14

Watch again.

1:30:161:30:18

Little knife...

1:30:181:30:20

Big knife!

1:30:211:30:23

Maybe when she first took it out it was just a bit cold.

1:30:231:30:27

Final clip from Case 39, and here we see a shape-shifting house.

1:30:291:30:34

Take a look at the corridor to her left.

1:30:341:30:36

Now it's a door.

1:30:421:30:43

And now the door is open.

1:30:451:30:48

I don't know whether to call an exorcist or Colin and Justin.

1:30:501:30:54

Honey, where are you?

1:30:561:30:58

Low-budget and low-rent Insidious now,

1:30:581:31:00

starring a rather casual Patrick Wilson with his shirt open.

1:31:001:31:04

Something's wrong. Quick, Patrick! Quicker!

1:31:051:31:08

BOY SCREAMS

1:31:081:31:11

Oh, you're finally here. Where have you been?

1:31:111:31:14

Oh, busy putting a tie on,

1:31:141:31:16

to look all smart for your distressed hysterical son.

1:31:161:31:19

-How thoughtful.

-Are you OK?

1:31:191:31:21

And now, Patrick's investigating the ghostly noise outside.

1:31:231:31:28

But, the porch lightbulb's just gone. Nightmare!

1:31:281:31:32

Well, maybe the ghost will change it.

1:31:341:31:37

Oh, he did!

1:31:371:31:39

I don't trust ghosts, you can see right through them.

1:31:391:31:43

Things are getting really scary in Insidious now.

1:31:451:31:49

Patrick's approaching the red door.

1:31:491:31:52

Look at all that smoke. Where's it all coming from?

1:31:521:31:55

Oh, the smoke machine in the corner.

1:31:581:32:01

This next section is about anachronisms,

1:32:031:32:05

which is when a thing is historically out of place.

1:32:051:32:07

Like a computer in Robin Hood

1:32:071:32:09

or a mobile phone in The Importance Of Being Earnest,

1:32:091:32:12

or those trainers on a cameraman who lives in the year 2011!

1:32:121:32:17

Don't look like that, Paul, I'm just joking.

1:32:171:32:19

I'm only joking, mate, come on! Don't be like that.

1:32:191:32:22

Look at the good times we've had.

1:32:221:32:24

Look at this block of flats in the powerful true-life flick

1:32:261:32:30

Made In Dagenham.

1:32:301:32:31

It's 1968, but someone's so far ahead of their time,

1:32:311:32:36

they've already got a satellite dish

1:32:361:32:38

and can watch reruns of programmes that haven't yet been made.

1:32:381:32:42

Here's a Ronnie Barker look-alike, denying that his factory workers

1:32:441:32:48

are members of a troublesome political group.

1:32:481:32:51

Do you know what we're dealing with?

1:32:511:32:53

Socialist Workers' Party, Workers' Revolutionary Party,

1:32:531:32:56

-Revolutionary Communist

-BLEEP

-Party.

1:32:561:32:59

-Who's she with?

-We don't actually think she's with anyone, sir.

1:32:591:33:02

We actually don't think she's a Communist.

1:33:021:33:05

But of course she isn't. None of these groups existed in the '60s.

1:33:051:33:09

I need a good trainer...

1:33:121:33:14

Secretariat is a plodding film,

1:33:141:33:16

but this old chap's getting down with the kids by showing off

1:33:161:33:20

his knowledge of 1972 hit movie Super Fly.

1:33:201:33:23

He's a French Canadian, dresses like Super Fly.

1:33:231:33:28

A shame that this film's set in 1969. Not so hip, Daddy-o.

1:33:281:33:33

It's inspirational '80s movie The Fighter,

1:33:361:33:38

where Marky Mark's funky bunch is swapped for some squabbling ladies.

1:33:381:33:43

But ignore them and look at the 2011 vehicle inspection sticker

1:33:431:33:47

in his buddy's car windscreen.

1:33:471:33:50

Trying to reverse away isn't going to help.

1:33:501:33:52

In '60s heart-warmer That's What I Am,

1:33:561:33:59

young Andy plays a drum kit with Sabian cymbals.

1:33:591:34:02

But Sabian didn't begin manufacturing cymbals until 1981.

1:34:021:34:07

That was certainly interesting.

1:34:071:34:10

Well, no, it certainly wasn't.

1:34:101:34:12

The bleak and frightening The Killer Inside Me,

1:34:161:34:19

and Casey Affleck's rummaging about in a lady's drawers.

1:34:191:34:23

Sheriff's office, ma'am, what are you doing with it?

1:34:231:34:26

I have a permit.

1:34:261:34:28

Apparently looking for a gun permit.

1:34:281:34:31

Something that's not needed to own a gun in Texas.

1:34:311:34:34

Satisfied, copper?

1:34:341:34:36

Hmm, a likely story. I think he just wants to fondle her pants.

1:34:361:34:41

I reckon it's all right.

1:34:411:34:42

-Now Casey's giving us his life story.

-I was born here 29 years ago.

1:34:481:34:52

Central City was small enough...

1:34:521:34:55

But look, here's a modern USPS truck reflected in the window.

1:34:551:35:00

Born ruddy yesterday, more like.

1:35:001:35:02

These days, the world of animation can produce miraculous characters

1:35:041:35:07

that are out of this world. But don't just believe me.

1:35:071:35:10

Why don't we ask my animated sidekick? It's Squigaloo Squirrel.

1:35:101:35:14

Hello there, Squigaloo!

1:35:151:35:17

Oh, Squigaloo, you do say the silliest things.

1:35:181:35:22

HE LAUGHS

1:35:221:35:24

No, you are, Squigaloo.

1:35:241:35:26

Now, introduce the next set of clips for the ladies and gentlemen,

1:35:261:35:30

featuring bloopers in animated movies.

1:35:301:35:32

Great. So we're going to put the squirrel on after, yeah?

1:35:361:35:39

Otherwise, that's just me talking to a brick.

1:35:391:35:42

I might look a ninny.

1:35:421:35:43

OK.

1:35:441:35:46

Well, I'll trust you this time.

1:35:461:35:48

Wild West fun now.

1:35:541:35:55

When Rango drops his bullets, we see him reloading them

1:35:571:36:00

on the right side of his gun.

1:36:001:36:04

-However, the chamber is hanging on the left side.

-Just a second.

1:36:041:36:09

Later on in the same scene, chameleons may be good at changing,

1:36:121:36:16

but some things shouldn't change.

1:36:161:36:18

Like here...

1:36:181:36:20

where the hawk is completely flattened to the ground...

1:36:201:36:23

..And now his feet poke up when they shouldn't be there.

1:36:271:36:30

More Rango, and this car crash has a traumatic effect

1:36:321:36:36

on the doll he shares a tank with.

1:36:361:36:38

Here she has a right arm.

1:36:381:36:40

But after this crash, it's now a left arm.

1:36:471:36:49

At the end of the day, I suppose it's just an "armless" bit of fun.

1:36:511:36:55

Some pig ignorance from the animators of Shrek.

1:36:591:37:02

Yes, he's back and he seems to be over the moon to be scaring everyone again.

1:37:021:37:07

Look how he scares those pigs.

1:37:081:37:11

He must have really scared them because as we zoom out,

1:37:111:37:14

they're nowhere to be seen.

1:37:141:37:16

Another Shrek mistake.

1:37:211:37:23

Yes, indeed, keep your eye on the letter F on the hanky

1:37:231:37:27

that Shrek picks up.

1:37:271:37:28

One minute it's there...

1:37:331:37:35

..then it's over there on completely the other side.

1:37:371:37:41

Get it right, for F's sake.

1:37:411:37:43

Disney's back on form now, even if the film-makers

1:37:451:37:48

get just as tangled as their characters in Tangled.

1:37:481:37:52

Flynn Ryder struggles onto his side as he's tied to the chair.

1:37:521:37:55

No can do.

1:37:551:37:56

However, next time he's pulled into shot, he's on his back again.

1:37:591:38:03

-Hairy stuff, I think you'll agree.

-A horse?

1:38:031:38:06

Zoology now, and here's the colourful Rio,

1:38:081:38:11

a film all about a macaw called Blu.

1:38:111:38:13

The perfect marshmallow-to-cocoa ratio.

1:38:151:38:17

But to macaws, cocoa is toxic.

1:38:171:38:21

Lucky this is an animation

1:38:211:38:22

or we really would've seen death by chocolate.

1:38:221:38:26

-Did it, boys.

-We did it!

1:38:291:38:31

It takes one animator an entire week to do just four seconds of footage.

1:38:311:38:35

But when they animate the flaps on this plane going down,

1:38:351:38:39

rather than up, which would've sent the plane careering to the ground,

1:38:391:38:42

you wonder whether that particular week was well spent.

1:38:421:38:46

Classy sequel Toy Story 3, where Barbie removes two screws

1:38:501:38:54

that hold Buzz Lightyear's back compartment.

1:38:541:38:57

..show you no mercy.

1:38:571:38:58

Why's it not working?

1:39:001:39:01

However, at no point do they re-screw the compartment closed.

1:39:011:39:05

It just stays shut for the rest of the movie.

1:39:051:39:07

IN SPANISH:

1:39:071:39:08

No wonder he's acting like he's got a screw loose.

1:39:081:39:11

Toy Story 3 begins with Mr Potato Head having only one eye

1:39:191:39:22

so that Andy can pretend he's wearing an eye patch.

1:39:221:39:26

But keep your eyes peeled on Mr Potato's eyes,

1:39:281:39:31

because when Andy's "mom" films him, he's suddenly regained it.

1:39:311:39:36

Peeled, you get it? Like peeling a potato?

1:39:361:39:38

Right, please yourselves.

1:39:381:39:40

More films are made about cars than any other mode of transport.

1:39:421:39:46

I used to love cars so much that I'd ever only watch

1:39:461:39:49

the final third of Planes, Trains And Automobiles.

1:39:491:39:51

But these days, I'm much more environmentally minded

1:39:511:39:54

and I think Hollywood should follow suit.

1:39:541:39:56

In The Italian Job, instead of Mini Coopers,

1:39:561:39:59

they should have foldaway bikes.

1:39:591:40:00

And I want to see The Fast And The Furious on Segways.

1:40:001:40:03

That said, would Ryan Gosling have looked as cool if,

1:40:031:40:06

instead of Drive, the film had been called Walk?

1:40:061:40:10

Insightful teen fun in Easy A, and Todd is driving Olive home.

1:40:141:40:19

But when we catch a glimpse of the speedometer,

1:40:191:40:21

we see that they're travelling at 0mph.

1:40:211:40:25

Something must be wrong with your car, mate.

1:40:251:40:28

Easy A? Better call the Easy AA, hmm?! Huh?!

1:40:281:40:31

In the straightforward Just Go With It, Jennifer Aniston

1:40:331:40:37

perfectly parks, silencing any chauvinists.

1:40:371:40:40

D'oh. Wait a minute.

1:40:401:40:42

What is that?

1:40:421:40:43

Turns out she's gone all over the lines. Birds, eh?

1:40:431:40:47

What?

1:40:471:40:48

The slow but thoughtful Rabbit Hole now,

1:40:501:40:53

and Nicole's not wearing a seatbelt.

1:40:531:40:55

-I don't want to move.

-I don't want another baby.

1:40:551:40:58

CAR HORN BLARES

1:40:581:41:00

Luckily, a seatbelt appeared just in the nick of time.

1:41:001:41:04

A clunk-click clunker.

1:41:041:41:06

-What're you doing?

-I just had to check the cake.

1:41:061:41:09

Matthew McConaughey's such a successful lawyer

1:41:121:41:15

in the thrilling drama The Lincoln lawyer,

1:41:151:41:17

that he's got a number plate that says NT GUILTY on it. Classy!

1:41:171:41:23

But in California, a licence plate can only have seven letters on it.

1:41:231:41:27

And NT GUILTY has eight.

1:41:271:41:29

Which makes it an illegal number plate, and very guilty indeed.

1:41:291:41:34

Oh, the irony!

1:41:341:41:36

He also has a chauffeur, which seems a bit poncey.

1:41:381:41:41

Surely he could drive himself?

1:41:411:41:44

Actually, the car can drive itself.

1:41:441:41:46

Yep, it was moving before he'd even started it.

1:41:491:41:52

Maybe his car is a distant cousin of Herbie.

1:41:571:41:59

When I heard that the downbeat drama Winter's Bone was a bit backward,

1:42:011:42:07

I thought that meant it was full of uneducated hillbilly types.

1:42:071:42:11

But no, it actually means it's backward,

1:42:111:42:13

as the reverse shot of this pick-up proves.

1:42:131:42:17

Warning - this vehicle is literally reversing.

1:42:171:42:19

Make sure your daddy knows the gravity of this deal.

1:42:191:42:22

In the unflinching crime movie, The Town,

1:42:261:42:29

the bank robbers are forced to drive around the block

1:42:291:42:31

as they wait for their plan to fall into place.

1:42:311:42:34

But the second time they drive up the same road,

1:42:371:42:40

all of the parked cars are different.

1:42:401:42:43

How long did it take them to drive around the block?

1:42:431:42:46

Mind you, you know how bad traffic can get in Town.

1:42:461:42:49

And now, more movie storyline flaws are reviewed and laid bare in...

1:42:511:42:55

In the hard-edged, pacy sci-fi thriller, District 9,

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crashed ali-ons are stranded in Johannesburg and are forced

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to live as second-class citizens in a ghetto

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policed by a big corporation and Nigerian gangsters who sell them cat food

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What everyone wants is the ali-ons' incredible superguns

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that can fire pigs and that.

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Hang on, incredible superguns?

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Red alert, those with massively superior weaponry

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don't tend to stay second-class citizens

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for much longer than it takes them to get their massively superior weaponry out.

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Tell you what, I'm getting a bit fed up with being oppressed.

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Too right, I mean there's only so much of this us ali-ons can take.

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You know, after 28 years of relentless abuse

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and slum-dwelling,

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I'm almost tempted to get the incredible superguns

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that only us ali-ons can use, and show these humans who's boss.

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On the other hand, cat food...

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Yup, yup, the cat food is nice and even with our ali-on ability

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to build superior weaponry and gigantic spacecraft

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that can hover powerlessly in the sky for decades,

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there's no guarantee that we'd be any good at making cat food.

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Yes, might as well sit tight and wait for the white man

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with the pretty arm to help us.

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Yeah.

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More Whiskas?

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Technology plays an increasingly vital role in the movies.

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Without mobile phones there'd be no Matrix,

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without computers there'd be no Tron

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and without the internet I wouldn't have illegally downloaded either of those.

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That's a joke, I don't approve of law-breaking!

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Phone, fax, Facebook, Google Plus, Twitter, iPhone, Blackberry,

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email, instant messenger -

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it's great to have so many different ways to find out that no-one wants to talk to you.

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Despite there being a whole film about Facebook,

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you don't see a lot of social networking sites in movies.

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Harry is now 'friends' with Sally.

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Mr and Mrs Smith went from 'married' to 'it's complicated'.

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I suppose it's lucky really.

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You don't want all your friends finding out you've been poked by Charlie Sheen.

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A clip from Buried - the taut thriller about a man

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buried alive with nothing but a mobile phone.

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The scariest part is that he doesn't even know how to use his mobile...

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See? It's upside down!

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It's clearly been turning in his grave.

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In sombre movie Hereafter, Marcus watches some YouTube clips.

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But see the information under the person talking?

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When he clicks on the second clip,

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it has the exact same amount of views and information!

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Perhaps it took 259,042 takes to do the scene?

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If you believe in Christ you have nothing to fear.

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Now the misfire that is Gulliver's Travels.

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No signal, but I got 12 messages - Mr Popularity!

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No signal? But you can't check messages without a signal.

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I wonder if Jonathan Swift knew he'd made a massive error

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when he wrote this in 1726?

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Now it's the highly implausible film Unknown.

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MOBILE BEEPS

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In this clip, Liam Neeson gets a text from 2010,

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even though the film is set in 2011.

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I'd change your service provider if I were you, Liam.

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Still on Unknown

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and now Liam's wife is trying to get into a password-protected file.

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She's figured out the password, clever lady,

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but if she'd looked a little harder she'd have seen

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that the password's accepted before she's typed it in!

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I'm personally not going to accept this error...

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Oh, go on then.

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Creaky suspense from Scream 4

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where Neve Campbell is clearly told by Hayden Panettiere

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that the landline's down and someone's smashed the router.

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I tried to call 911 but the landline's dead and someone's smashed the router.

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-I think I got through on my cell.

-OK, where's Jill?

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However, a bit later on,

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when she whips out her phone, we see that the WiFi signal is on.

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Perhaps someone was WiFired for that blunder?

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Tell Sydney heads are going to roll tonight!

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The laws of time are disregarded

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in the high-octane but routine Unstoppable.

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Here, Chris Pine has a picture of his beautiful wife on his phone.

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Debt of gratitude, blah, blah, blah

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But at the press conference at the end of the film,

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we see a shot of his beautiful wife that's exactly the same picture.

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See? Unstoppable? That's unacceptable.

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Films get better with age, like so many things.

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Wine, cheese, a good lover -

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or at least that's what I tell my girlfriend.

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She's 78 and needs a lot of confidence boosting,

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so here are some slightly older clips

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that we may have missed in the first two shows.

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STATIC AND CLATTERING

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Oh! She's had another fall. Excuse me!

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Lovable musical Grease now,

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and Vi demonstrates early voice control technology

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as all it takes is for her to do a low grunt...

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and the light goes out.

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She certainly didn't flick the switch - look...

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..her elbow is a good few inches away.

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How's it done, Vi?

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Enlighten us!

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THEY ALL SING "SUMMER NIGHTS"

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Ah, those crazy school days, when everyone could perform

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a flawless, impromptu song-and-dance number!

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Best years of my life!

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Though Rizzo goes and ruins it by putting on some cool shades...

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that instantly come off.

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But it takes our eye off Travolta readjusting his tight trousers...

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Oh, back on again.

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Good diversion, Rizzo!

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The colourful, camp classic The Wizard of Oz

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and Dorothy's down the Yellow Brick Road in her iconic red shoes.

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But she's a bit peckish...

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The tree doesn't like this.

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-Well, how would you like someone come and pinch something off of you?

-Oh, dear!

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Well- we find out, as someone's had it away with Dorothy's lovely shoes

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and replaced them with dreary old dance shoes.

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Look!

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Hooray! I guess that did it. Help yourself.

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Now as Dorothy chases the Tin Man,

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see how the very important can of oil falls out of her basket.

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Here it is!

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Luckily with oil prices as they are,

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it reappears intact so Tin Man can sort out his arthritic joints.

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That was wonderful.

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Well, OIL be damned!

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The original and best Superman movie now,

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and while you may believe a man can fly, he can also walk through glass.

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Here, he's in a different door partition to Lois,

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but when they come out, they leave from the same partition.

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Also - rewind that...

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Yep, a clear reflection of the camera man.

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Now I'll believe a man can spy.

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Clark Kent is ever the polite gentleman, even when knocked out.

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Did you see that?

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See? He doffs his hat to his mugger as he runs away.

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The final word in romantic comedies is Pretty Woman,

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but I wish Julia Roberts would sort her manners out -

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look she's talking through a mouthful of croissant...

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How far did you go in school?

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Even more impolitely, she then changes it to a pancake!

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Your folks must be proud.

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And then takes a second bite out...

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..which goes back on the pancake afterwards.

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Disgraceful.

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Ah, the epic and magical Sound of Music,

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and look at the lovely scenery.

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On such a beautiful, clear and sunny day

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wouldn't you want to climb up an Alpine hillside,

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take a deep breath of fresh air and just sing your guts out?

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Come on, Julie, give us a burst!

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Oh, it's suddenly gone all dull and cloudy.

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I'd go back in, love. Film's over, everyone!

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Out of all last year's films,

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we think this next film had the moist mistakes.

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Did I say moist?

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Out of all of last year's films,

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we think this next mistake had the most mistakes...

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Out of all of last year's films, we think this nest film...

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Nest?

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Out of all the films,

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we think this next one had the most mistakes, of last year.

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Out of all of last year's mistakes, this was the most.

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Out of all of last year's films,

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we think this next film had the most mistakes YES!

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Sorry, without the yes.

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And the film we found the most mistakes in this year

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was the very underwhelming and disappointing

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The Green Hornet remake.

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Let's count them up!

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Good morning.

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Keep staring at the attractive lady lying in the bed,

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as one minute she's all covered up,

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then the duvet comes down and we see her bra!

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Then it goes up...

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and down

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and up and down for the rest of the scene.

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Of course, I watched this clip several times

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just to be sure of the mistake.

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Two mistakes for the price of one in this car chase.

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The offside headlight gets knocked out by The Hornet's car...

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Oh, no.

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..but as the car flips over, it's all fixed again!

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Then the car careers forwards,

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but slams through the window backwards.

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Proof indeed that two wrongs don't make a right...

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They make a right clanger.

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This is the greatest moment of my life.

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She's completely un-nailable.

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It's a terrible fact, I don't know what to do.

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In this clip, Kato drives very straight

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down a very straight road, but look how erratically he steers!

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This film's proving to have more gaffs than a dodgy council estate...

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And here's three more whoppers.

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Watch this weapon as it disappears quicker than director

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Michel Gondry's credibility.

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Ta-da!

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But now just watch Mr Beach Ball sat proudly on his chair.

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Ooh, now he's off...

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Maybe he's trying to escape from this movie, I wouldn't blame him.

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I mean, he may have a better offer.

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There's probably a volleyball tournament he could be starring in.

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That would be nice.

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Oh, no, now he's back.

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Mr Beach Ball, I'd have a word with your agent.

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You're better than this.

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Get off my property!

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In this scene, look at the tree in the background.

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What are you doing up here? All the guys are waiting.

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Popeye walks far past it... and now he's right next to it.

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Maybe Mr Tree's after more screen time?

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We'll never know.

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Last one.

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The gas mask is clearly on Chudnofsky's forehead

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as he fights Kato.

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..or be it your blood, red will be the last colour...

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Then, suddenly, it's entirely on his face...

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I'd keep it on if I were you.

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With nine solid goofs, this film's a bit of a stinker.

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Well, that's all the time we have left for Great Movie Mistakes Three.

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All that remains is for us to show you

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some of the mistakes that we've spotted in our own show.

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For example:

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Technology plays an increasingly vital role in the movies...

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'Did you notice that in this clip

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'there was a silver warrior robot in shot?'

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I always say the key to a successful double act...

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'This link looks fairly uneventful

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'but let's see that again.'

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I always say, the key to having a successful double act...

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'You can clearly see they've used a stunt Robert for this scene.'

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But the worst mistake of the show has to be

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forgetting to write a proper ending.

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So, um, bye, I guess.

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That's it.

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But stick around, there's probably some show about pregnant teens next.

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Subtitles by Red Bee Media

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Email [email protected]

1:56:491:56:52

Robert Webb is back with a brand new helping of silver screen slip-ups from recent hit movies, exposing shocking gaffes from the Hollywood blockbusters, box office number ones, Oscar-nominated masterpieces and biggest flops. It reveals continuity blunders, terrible anachronisms, physical mishaps, members of crew sneaking into shot, factual errors, visual effects goofs and even moments when an entire film's plot falls apart.

You'll believe a superhero can bash his head! You'll be beguiled by a man making desperate call on an upside down phone! And you'll be confounded by a huge plank of wood appearing for no logical reason!


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