23/09/2013 The One Show

Join us tonight to see this historic beach transformed by volunteers to

mark the place where 9,000 fell. Hello and welcome to the show -

we'll be watching that amazing event which took place this weekend with

tonight's guest. He's a home-grown Hollywood star - but he can also do

this very well. # 16 coaches long

# That long black train took my baby back home... It's Hugh Laurie!

Welcome back to the UK. You have been away, working on the fantastic

House. Did you miss most about being away? So many things. The

weather... They don't really have weather over there. No seasons. I

miss beer, I know that is the kind of thing people say, because it is,

and I am saying it. But I really did miss it. I miss it. Budweiser does

not hit the spot. Are you back for good? If you will have me! I feel

there is a probationary period, let's see if you can remember which

there is a probationary period, side of the road we drive on, I will

see why can pass that! But it's wonderful to be back. We will have

you back every Monday! Later on we'll be introducing Hugh to a

virtuoso who can give any tune you like a classical make over. He's

even made a favourite children's TV theme sound like Tchaikovsky.

Intriguing. Now let's join Iwan on the sands of Normandy.

You are lying there, and thinking, what is going to happen? My personal

thoughts were, and my dead? And my sister, my girlfriend, you wonder if

you are ever going to see them again. When you see your mates go

down, and you can't stop them. 9000 losses of life in just a few hours

on the stretch of beach. Today two artists are going to create a visual

Robson station to show us that from scene. -- a visual representation.

On a simple level, we're going to draw out 9000 silhouettes to

represent the people who died, 24 hours of D-day. We are using premade

stencils, there are many figures we have drawn around, people using the

stencils to rake the sand, so we can show in stark contrast with the sun

shining. What we're doing as a piece artwork is an example of what

happens in the absence of peace. It is not a stencil of a figure in the

San, it is about a life that was lost, they will all be washed away

just as they were 70 years ago. How did this idea come about? In 2010, I

came to these beaches with my father, I did a tour of the landing

sites, and I thought, wait a minute, I am walking on sand. I am a sound

artist, and I'm obsessed with the Second World War. How can I produce

a piece of that combines the two? The artwork is being created on this

beach. This Normandy veteran has come along to see its creation. He

was in the second wave of troops to land and has never forgotten the

was in the second wave of troops to terrible scenes he saw that day. War

is war, and you appreciate people will get killed. When you mention

the number that was killed in the will get killed. When you mention

few hours, you can imagine what it was like. We lost quite a few.

Wounded, killed. And you know, that's the emotional part of it.

Every year, there is hundreds of us. It used to be thousands, become

the honour pilgrimage. We visit the graves, we lay crosses, Reeves.

During the day, it is a very solemn occasion but in the evening, we have

a few beers because we know they are with us. Can I stop a minute?

100 volunteers worked nonstop to help create this piece of work. Even

100 volunteers worked nonstop to with it's only half complete, the

images are already starting to have an impact. It's really strange. Out

images are already starting to have of respect, I am tiptoeing, almost

like I am in a graveyard. You don't want to trade, because it is no

longer sounds to me. I am looking at them as people, it is bizarre. The

volunteers have only been working for an hour, and it's just

unbelievable, the amount of bodies for an hour, and it's just

on the ground. Just here, that someone's son, someone's brother, it

could have been me or you. That is someone's life that was taken. Just

remarkable. Why did you feel the need to come and help out today? I

lost my son in Afghanistan last year. I wanted to come and take part

lost my son in Afghanistan last in this. It's so emotional, just

thinking about it. It really is. I came in memory of my dad, he is a

veteran, he died last September. This is where he landed. Well, quite

a scene. You did the 9000. Yes, we achieved what we set out to do. Now,

I don't know, the event has hit me. I'm feeling a little bit drained but

what struck me is it is very quiet. Seems to me, a lot of people are

just looking and thinking, probably Seems to me, a lot of people are

in shock, really. To me, I am looking up there and inking, that is

a lot... A lot for the mind, the eyes and the heart today Kim. -- to

take in. Now I am just going to die just what we have done. -- digests.

That must be one of the most extraordinary aerial shots we have

shown. It sends a chill down the spine. Absolutely amazing.

Incredible, brilliant idea. Thanks to all the volunteers. Last time you

were here, it was quite a while ago. 1971! Yes, you were talking about

your first blues album. You seemed a bit nervous at the time, almost with

an actor with a bit of a sideline, you didn't know how well it would be

received, but it became a really big success, were you shocked? I was

stunned, still am. I didn't think of it as my first album, but I thought

of it as my blues album, that would it as my first album, but I thought

be the end of it. Nice try, Sony, back in your box! The fact that it

went well, people seem to like it and they liked the shows

went well, people seem to like it turned up was so amazing. To be able

to say, my second blues album, is just an amazing thing! Your first

sold over a million, it did incredibly well. Here you are with

the second, your barbecue really focused on this. What are you

focusing on this time around? It's focused on this. What are you

all different! I just wanted to keep going on this journey. I think

all different! I just wanted to keep if people will let me do it, I sort

of see ten of these, stretching out into the future. Someone will surely

of see ten of these, stretching out blow the whistle and say enough! But

these are the songs I have loved since I was very young. We go a bit

later, we start earlier and finish later, so it's a broader

chronology, and we also get a different places. We have an

Argentinian tango, and we have songs from different parts of the country.

It's more of a mixture of sounds and atmospheres. We also have two

wonderful female singers on it as well and I personally think it's

more romantic. I was going to say sexier, I bailed out and said

romantic! Know it is sexy, but I thought it was you singing, this is

you performing the latest single, it is called Junco Partner.

# He had friends all over town # Well now he's broke, broken and

busted # And there ain't no friends to be

found. So you are telling the story

blues throughout history, and there is a reason you wanted to go and

sing live on the Queen Mary Lynagh. There is, it is a bit of a holy

place for me, that was the scene of the rebirth of Professor long-hair.

It is actually Paul McCartney, he had a party there, he was in the

middle of the tour, he said, where had a party there, he was in the

up will we have it? And we headed on the Queen Mary. He arranged to have

Professor long-hair and the Meters, the Queen Mary. He arranged to have

who both made records that night. The professor had really vanished

from the scene, they found him sweeping up in a shop in New

Orleans, no one knew where he had disappeared to. It was largely tanks

to that record, certainly in my life, that he came back into the

public realm and was properly anointed as the king of New Orleans

piano. You might be playing him on Radio 2 now! You have a new series

on that now. Is this your chance to educate the listeners about these

music and bring it into the main team -- mainstream? I would not

presume to educate the listeners of Radio 2, who are very savvy bunch. I

just hope they enjoy the records we play. But one of the things we have

done is take a single song, we do a mystery train, and also with Stagger

Lee, which is a song hundreds of mystery train, and also with Stagger

people have done, and we follow the progress of that song, the way the

story of it has changed as well as the feel of it, and we see the

story of it has changed as well as different treatments. We wonder why

a song like that survives in a way different treatments. We wonder why

that all sorts of other cultural different treatments. We wonder why

things vanish. Space hoppers, for example, we don't see them these

days! Which is a shame! I would love to commute on a space hopper! But a

song like Stagger Lee, no matter what you do, it won't go away. There

was something about it that speaks what you do, it won't go away. There

to us, musicians keep discovering it and going back to it, there is

something about that story that they can't let go full stop it's going to

be a brilliant sequence -- series. So you're making this film with

George Clooney. George Clooney is making a film with me! Disney have

George Clooney. George Clooney is sent us this synopsis, it is top

secret. Can you read it for us, because we couldn't quite work out

what it says? It's the official one! Really? Bound by a shared destiny, a

bright, optimistic teen bursting with scientific curiosity and a

former boy-genius inventor jaded by disillusionment embark on a

danger-filled mission to unearth the secrets of an enigmatic place

somewhere in time and space that exists in their collective memory as

Tomorrowland. Do you recognise that? That was

very cleverly done. They have given you nothing. I went out on the

streets to see whether our left the audience could make a head or tail

of it. Tomorrowland is... Well... It seems good but something you

cannot understand. I think... I will be honest, it makes no sense

battle. There we are. That was brilliantly done! I cannot wait to

see it either. I have not got a clue what it is about. That to the

music. His album has been out since May. -- back.

to stop people from playing music too loud or drinking dodgy cider in

a certain part of town. But an ASBO that bans someone from a whole

country, that's a new one on us. Miranda is here.

With bird numbers in decline, egg collecting was eventually made

illegal in 1954. By 2000, it carried a jail sentence. Despite

the heavy penalties, illegal egg collectors still target the UK's

nesting bird colonies. This Hebridean island is an important

site for nesting seabirds, including the largest colony of

shearwaters. With only 40 people living on the island, one egg beef

hoped his illicit activities would go unnoticed. -- -- thief. I

spotted a man going into the genes. I started to watch him through my

telescope. I could see him with eggs in his hand. He darted off

after around 20 minutes. He went into a black house close to the

ruined bothy. I did not see him at all after that. Ali reported this

ruined bothy. I did not see him at to the police. They received a

second description of a man acting strangely. It immediately raised

the suspicions of a national wildlife crime officer. We caught a

the suspicions of a national ferry and, as we were crossing to

the island, we got a radio transmission to say he was actually

on the jetty waiting to catch the ferry boat we were going to be a

lighting off. We approached him. I identified myself as a police

officer. I asked him his name. He said Matthew gone sure. I recognise

that name. I said, I think we have our boy caused the of he was

already known to the police as a notorious aches thief. -- we have

got our boy. All the artefacts on the table have come out of his bag?

Yes, that is right. The small cakes are willow warbler and pipit eggs.

Police had enough evidence to charge him with illegal possession

of wild bird aches. They wanted proof he had taken them. -- eggs.

Their worst DNA of the Gulf family and Shearwater. -- there was DNA.

Their worst DNA of the Gulf family This was enough to issue a warrant

to raid his East London flat. It included excerpts from some of the

rarest birds. -- eggs. At the hearing the prosecution noted that

a significant number of the eggs had large untidy holes in them,

suggesting they were stolen and blend days before hatching. He

would have killed the developing chick in order to preserve the

shelf. He was sentenced to six months in prison and to a further

six months by the sheriff court in Inverness. They were not his first

convictions. The courts needed a new approach to stop this

compulsive trophy hunter. In addition to his imprisonment and,

in an unprecedented move for a wildlife crime, he was issued with

an antisocial behaviour order by English and Scottish courts. The

ASBO banned him for life for English and Scottish courts. The

entering Scotland during breeding season. It increased penalties for

any future crime he may commit, raising the fine from £5,000 to

£20,000, and the jail term to five years. Two breeding seasons on and

he has not reoffend it. It seems the ASBO may have finally stamped

out this crawl and very destructive hangover of a Victorian pastime. --

this April. What is the incentive for this? There is no money

involved. We're all shaking our heads. It seems the most pointless

thing to do. You cannot show it off as a be cannot boast your friends

or display it in any way. -- show it off. You cannot boast to your

friends. It is a trophy? Absolutely. The RSPB had been building up a

profile of people they have caught stealing eggs. They believe it is

the thrill of the chase - evading the police. Climbing the tree and

scaling down the mountain. People died doing this. It is a crazy

thing. There is Hope at hand. Using things like social media it means

wildlife crime officers and bird lovers can get together a spread

the word about looking after this rare nesting bird. There is at some

positive news as well. In a moment, you are going to treat us to a jam

session, tinkling the ivories. First, Richard Mainwairing shows us

how you can make classical music out of classic children's telly. 40

years ago, a group of quirky characters, determined to

years ago, a group of quirky Wimbledon Common, became a TV

phenomenon. The Wombles also had a musical impact for their

distinctive sound. There is a real snobbery about children's

television programmes. Some dismiss them as trivial but I think they

should be celebrated on musical merit. I have always loved the

theme to the Wombles. Mike Batt has been one of the most successful

songwriters, creating a Winter's Tale and Bright Eyes was that his

Korea First to cough when he was asked to write the theme to the

Wombles. -- his career first took off. The characters had to be

somewhere in the music. That thing where you don't... It had that kind

of jolly quality that eyesore in the Wombles. The team was

originally composed and a keyboard. When it was recorded for the album,

he used the full range of orchestral instruments, from

strings to French horns will start I was passionate about the

orchestra. -- French horns. You have it going to you unconsciously

as part of your upbringing. Did you ever think this was wasted on a

children's television theme? They are young adults. They have very

receptive brains. I have the advantage of being a bit of a kid.

I wanted it to be something that was of interest to them and also of

interest to me. They had eight hit singles and four gold albums.

Inspired by my chat with Mike and the success of the Wombles, I had

an idea. Can I take some of my favourite television tunes and see

an idea. Can I take some of my if they stand up to this treatment?

First, the Banana Splits in the style of Mozart.

I think that really works. How about the Magic Roundabout in the

style of Strauss. Yes, I love that one. But he is the

challenge. I have come to Leeds Town Hall for a special performance.

I have arranged the Wombles theme in the style of Tchaikovsky for the

National Children's Orchestra. Well an audience recognise the tune or

appreciate its musical nuances? You are in for a bit of a treat. A

well-known piece of music arranged especially for tonight's

performance. We hope you really, really enjoy it.

It has gone from being the Wombles to the Nutcracker now.

That was fabulous. Job done! I loved it. What did the audience

think? Did you enjoy it? The Wombles was superb. What did you

think of it? It was fabulous. Up did you know what style and was

trying to copy? Which composer? Tchaikovsky. Next time you listen

to a children's television theme, Tchaikovsky. Next time you listen

listen a bit closer. It might just be a classic.

Richard, in your words, this and closer, it might be a classic.

Richard, in your words, this and believe that was to be see but I am

not quite sure. -- Debussy. That was Rhubarb and Custard. In your

honour, Hugh, Richard has rearranged the theme from House,

which I have to say was pretty special to start with.

It is so great to see you play. You saw the piano and you're right, I

need to sit back and play. That has nothing on you two. Now we just

have enough time for the obligatory Stephen Fry question. There is

always a Stephen Fry question. I have a couple as well. You are

going to be working together on an Oscar Wilde story that stuck we are.

We started recording the voice for an animated film of an Oscar

Wilde's story. The Canterbury ghost. It is a very funny script. We are

barely adequate but the script is terrific and the animation is

terrific and I think it will be really good. It is out in 2015.

Plenty of time to work on that one. Anything before then? We are always

talking about it but we are doing more talking than doing. The

talking is fun. Thank you very much. Thank you for being such a great

sport. You can see footage from that series on the red button in a

few minutes. Tomorrow, we have James