Abrams Tank Richard Hammond's Crash Course

This should be fun.

I've driven just about every high-powered vehicle there is,

but that was just for fun.

The world's biggest, baddest vehicles are made to work.

So now I've decided to travel across the United States to see

if I can conquer the monsters of the work site.

I'll have just three days to learn how to handle these complex

and dangerous machines that normally take years of training to master.

And in the end, we'll find out if I'm good enough to get the job done.

This is the Abrams M1A2 tank.

The most feared tank on any battlefield.

Its nickname is Whispering Death,

on account of its surprisingly quiet 1,500 horsepower turbine engine

and its awesome fighting power.

These are the tanks that spearheaded the capture of Baghdad.

Not surprisingly, running one of these things is not a one-man job.

I've got three days to learn not just how to drive it

but how to act as gunner and as tank commander.

And at the end, my final exam,

we do the same test as that faced by real army tankers.

Fortunately, I have the 1st Armoured Division's top tank crew

as my teachers.

Excuse me. I'm Richard Hammond.

Richard Hammond, nice to meet you. Sergeant First Class Dilling.

-This is your crew?

-It is.

-I'm Sergeant Shaffer.

-Nice to see you.

-PFC Wyman.

-PFC Wyman, hello.

PFC Vasquez.

Vasquez. Nice to see you.

So, can I meet the tank?

Follow me and I'll show it to you.

-Follow you to the tank.

-Yeah.

Lovely to meet you. I'm just going to go and say hello to your tank.

-So, this is it, obviously.

-It is.

Here is the beast.

Now, dumb question, I'm guessing, this is the front?

-It is the front.

-And the driver sits there?

Yes. That's your driver's station.

Where is the rest of the crew in there?

Inside of the turret. There's three more inside.

-So they turn with the turret.

-Yes.

And the shape of the thing, it's quite clean-looking.

It's got a clean shape.

The way it was designed was for maximum deflection.

So this isn't streamlining, having this nice, supercar, sloped nose,

this is to deflect rounds off it in the same with that plane there.

Same as the turret up on top here, yes.

But, obviously, the critical bit,

we're all ignoring the elephant in the room here, is that bit, there.

I mean, it's pretty obvious, that is one big gun.

That is a 120mm smoothbore main gun.

Also, the gunner has access to a 240 machinegun.

The loader mounted on top has a 240 machinegun also,

and the tank commander has a .50 calibre machinegun.

Let's continue walking around.

-Now, the engine.

-Yes.

Lives somewhere in there, yeah?

Yes. Underneath back deck is the engine.

-And that's a 1,500 horsepower turbine.

-It sure is.

What's it like in there?

It feels like you're on top of the world.

I don't want to say invincible but it's amazing. After 13 years, I still get excited to be around them.

-So you still feel that I've got the coolest vehicle in the parking lot?

-Of course. No doubt about it.

So if I had a Lamborghini?

I've got the tank. What does a Lamborghini got on a tank?

Nothing really. So, can I have a go?

Driving it?

Yeah.

Absolutely...not.

Oh. Well, can I at least have a ride in it?

We can give you ride.

Yeah, yeah. That's what I'll do. Right, OK, where's the door?

Oh!

Oh-oh-oh!

I'm slightly scared now.

'Nice and easy, keep going.'

'Slow, slow, slow, steady, steady, on right there.'

Oh, bang! That's a really...

Yeah. You probably want to keep your left arm. OK, are you ready?

-Lower the gun.

-Oh, God.

Oh, I don't want to be here when that happens.

INAUDIBLE CHATTER

-Fire and adjust.

-All right.

Target, ceasefire. Target, ceasefire. Target, ceasefire.

'I can see now how essential it is for all four members

'of the tank crew to work as a single unit.

'If one man is out of sync, the results could be catastrophic.'

'If I'm to qualify to call myself a tanker, I'm going to have to

'become a seamless part of Sergeant Dilling's team.'

Guys, can I just say that it is unbelievable in there.

When that gun comes back, oh, you can really feel it, it's just chaos.

Thanks for that first taste of it. I've got a lot to learn.

-Once you sit in each position, it'll all come together.

-Yep.

I hope it does. Because that just felt like chaos.

I can still hear it.

When you're learning to drive any vehicle from scratch,

inevitably there comes that moment when you have to get in

and drive it for the first time.

The thing is, when that vehicle is a tank...

Well, you're in a tank.

They needed something to bridge the gap and that's what happens in here.

These boxes aren't used for storing fruit, or something.

Inside of each of these is a tank.

It's a virtual tank, but a tank nonetheless, so I start in here.

Just got to remember where I parked.

Uh, Vazquez?

Yes.

Hi. You look like you got stuck in a fridge.

Yeah, it looks like it.

-This is it?

-So, this is the driver's hole.

-It's snug isn't it?

-Yes.

I don't have to get in there with you to show me the controls, do I?

I really hope not.

OK, so if you start the tank, first of all you begin push to start once.

Right here, on the right side, you do have the throttle.

It's like a motorcycle, you have the handle here

and then you have another handle on this side.

It's an enormous bike.

-It would be an enormous bike, yes.

-Wow!

-That is amongst the coolest things I've ever seen.

-Yes.

You'll have a lot of fun in here.

It's absolutely mega.

-No, that's not allowed.

-It's against the law.

-OK.

Any questions?

Yes, you have a go. OK.

Put this on first, I'm guessing.

Yes, yes.

-Put both feet...

-I can't get both feet, I'm standing on one of them!

Go ahead and put that one there.

Put the other one there as well and just slide in.

Oh, yeah. Here I go.

Oh, that's cosy, isn't it cosy?

Go ahead, on the throttle, bring it to the right.

OK, now you have to drive, OK?

I'll drive the tank. So coming off the service brake.

And...oh, it's already on idle, it's moving a little bit.

So I'm going to steer around that bush, though I suspect that's not a big problem.

Yeah, they're just bushes, you could run them over.

It won't hurt you.

Yeah. I'm in a tank. You're in a tank. Don't worry about that.

Go ahead and coast it, let go on the throttle.

It comes to a stop, hit your parking brake.

Oh, this foot down on here?

Yeah, all the way in.

Parking brake. It just sounds so mundane, doesn't it? It's a tank!

"Parking brake".

-OK, you're all set?

-Yes.

Good luck. I'm going to close the door on you

and you'll be here by yourself, OK?

Shut the big fridge. OK. This is weird.

This is out of a space movie.

If I looked on to this screen and saw X-wing fighters coming at me,

I wouldn't be entirely surprised.

This is wild.

OK, Richard.

Hello?

At this time, we're going to start the simulator.

Have fun and good luck. And listen to your tank commander.

Right.

'For this part of my training, I'm in the driver simulator.

'And next door Sgt Shaffer and Private Wyman will be in

'a separate simulator acting as tank commander and gunner.'

'Meanwhile, Sgt Dilling will be monitoring

'all of my progress from down the hall in mission control.'

'No pressure then.'

Hamster, can you hear me?

I can. Hamster, that's my handle. Yeah, I can.

Yeah, Hamster's good.

We're going to go over some basic movement drills, here.

So, go ahead and drive straight, see what we got.

Right. So parking brake coming off.

Oh, ooh, right.

Can't get the parking brake off.

Release... I didn't have to release this before.

Be there in a second, sir.

Did you pull the release all the way out?

It's come all the way out. Oh, it's off, it's off. It's off now.

So going into drive, I'm in drive.

All right.

See those targets there?

We've got contact, light in the armour. We're engaging at this time.

-GUNSHOTS

-Oh. What was that?

GUNSHOTS

Was that leaving the tank or hitting the tank?

-Fire.

-All the way.

-Get 'em?

-Target.

One thing I should have said,

any sort of simulator, I believe entirely.

That's the way my brain works, the moment I get in it, it's real.

So I'm scared.

Go, go, go. Driver, hard right.

OK, Richard, at this time, we are going to index your mission.

Go ahead and come out of the simulator

and we'll meet you outside to give you the verdict on your driving.

Oh!

So I finally passed muster on the simulator test

which means it's now my turn to have a go on the big one.

My guess is it's going to be loud.

Hello.

Hello, Richard.

-Is this it?

-It is.

-These are my driving gloves.

-Yeah?

And once they're on, I can't take them off until I've driven.

OK. We'll put you in there. You can drive, this time.

-Thank you. Where's the steps? There must be steps.

-Straight up.

That didn't go well.

-Hello, guys.

-How's it going Richard?

You'll be fine with me. Don't worry.

Right. Getting in. Oh.

This is even less comfortable than the simulator.

OK. This is your office.

Yes, welcome to it.

All the way down through that. There you go.

-Oh, yeah.

-Go ahead and put that on.

Push to start.

Push to start.

Push it.

ENGINE WHIRRS

That's the turbine firing up. This is suddenly not a simulator any more.

This is an actual tank.

-Good luck.

-Thank you.

Closing. Closing. Closing. There, I'm in the tank.

I can't see a damn thing.

Are you good down there?

I will be in a second. I'm just adjusting the mirrors so that I can see.

Oh. I can see the barrel. Wow.

OK. What I want you to do now is go ahead and put it in drive by yourself.

I'm going into drive.

I'm in drive.

ENGINE WAILS

OK. He's saying come on so coming off the brake.

Oh! Oh, God!

Nice and easy. There you go.

That feels fast.

No, this ain't fast at all yet.

There you go.

Nice and easy, nice and easy turn.

Giving it some gas.

Oh, wow.

It's just a surge as the gear changed there.

Talk about relentless. Wow. I've driven a lot of stuff.

This is like nothing else.

What if something's coming the other way?

Everybody'll get out of the way.

They do that when you're in a tank, do they?

Ha-ha!

Wow! Yes.

I've had my first drive. It was a lot of work to get to this point.

But it was worth it.

That's an incredible-feeling machine.

-Richard.

-Yeah.

We are here at the beginning of your driver's course.

This course has been designed specifically for you.

It will test your driving abilities

and to ensure that you listen and pay attention

to your tank commander at all times.

I'll listen and pay attention at all times.

If anything goes wrong, is it my fault?

Yes. I will blame you.

OK. Just wanted to clear that up.

-Are you ready?

-Yeah.

Let's put this thing in drive.

All right, give her some gas.

We got some hills here as you come to your left.

Oh. This thing is mighty, mighty.

All right. I want you take a hard left, right now. Come on. Give it gas. Give it gas.

Whoa. There's a car in the way. There's a car in the way.

All right. Stop.

There's a car in the way. We've gone wrong.

We're going to run it over.

That's a Porsche 928.

I don't care. It's your job to listen to me.

We're going to run it over.

Well, I had one of those. That looks like a '79, I had that exact car.

That's OK. There's more of 'em like it out there.

What if I don't do it?

We'll kick you out of the driver's hole and you can walk back.

Oh, OK.

I will obey my tank commander and run over the Porsche 928.

Let's do it. I want you to aim straight for the driver's door.

OK.

All right. Let off the brakes.

I'm doing this because you told me to.

Left, left, left, left.

Give it gas, right now, give it gas, give it gas.

More gas, more gas, more gas.

That's what I'm talkin' about!

What have I done?

You listen to me and we're going to be OK.

That's a piece of German exotica! It was supposed to replace the 911.

Not any more.

We're going to back over it now.

Oh, God!

We are. OK.

On your orders.

Straight back, straight back.

There you go.

-Oh-oh!

-How do you like that?

Stop rubbing my nose in it, boss. Come on!

All right. I want you to pull forward and go left.

Drive, going left?

Yeah. All right, give her some gas.

To the right, right now. Hard right, hard right.

Oh, no.

-That's OK.

-That's a classic Chevelle.

Come to the right.

All right. Come left, come left, come left.

Straight on. Give it gas, give it gas. Right now.

Oh!

Oh.

It's gone. Where's it gone?

Stop, back up.

Oh, it's still there, look. It's coming with us.

No, back up.

This hurts!

This is causing me pain.

We're showing how to graciously let them go.

That's all we're doing.

You can't be a tank commander and a poet. Stop it, Sergeant Dilling.

-I'm trying, I'm trying. OK.

-Graciously letting 'em go. Come on!

-Are we ready?

-Yeah.

All right. Back straight up.

All right, stop.

OK, drive's engaged.

All right, go. Hard left, hard left, hard left. More left. Give it gas.

Ha-ha-ha!

I shouldn't be enjoying this, I really should not.

Straight, straight, straight.

Hard right, hard right, hard right, hard right.

-Straight, straight, straight, straight.

-Oh, no!

Hard right. All right. Stop, stop, stop, stop.

That's a Mustang. That's about a '68. I still have one of...

I know. That's why we have one here for you.

It's a pretty little Mustang, sir.

-We are going to kick you off this tank.

-Oh, OK. Sorry, sorry.

Oh, man, there's bit's off that I could use on mine at home.

I'm restoring it.

There might be a little bit left.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

I want you to back up.

Please forgive me, car guys everywhere, for what I'm about to do.

OK. Let's do it. Straight on, straight on, straight on.

Right, right, right, right, right, right.

What have I done? I can't look, I can't even look.

All right. Let's stop.

Oh, I feel filthy and wrong.

I've destroyed one of your country's finest cars.

Mustang, a pony car, killed.

All right. Let's go ahead and hop out.

That was both unbelievably good and unspeakably bad.

So, what do you think?

I think that something in your head is a bit mean.

The test was to make sure that you would listen

-to the tank commander as a driver.

-I did.

That's what the test was.

You don't know what that cost me inside. Deep down here.

There'll be nights I'll be waking up and seeing that Mustang going under the tracks.

Did I pass my driving bit? I followed orders.

I think you passed.

I think you did.

So, I've got to be honest and tell you the truth.

What?

All the cars, they came from a junk yard.

-They weren't runners?

-No, they were junk already.

-Well, you know how to test a guy don't you?

-Sure do.

Well, now I feel a lot happier. Thanks for that.

Well, it's day two for me here at Fort Bliss, Texas,

where I've tasked myself with learning to drive and operate

the Abrams M1A2 tank.

Well, the day begins with, well, no tank.

This physical training.

It's oh-my-goodness o'clock,

and they told me I have to do this.

Right.

You'll be OK. You drank a lot of water last night, right?

-No.

-No?

-Not really.

You might be in trouble, then.

'When they said physical training, I was expecting, oh,

'I don't know, a couple of push-ups, maybe a squat-thrust or two.'

'But as it turns out, to be a tanker,

'I have to complete 39 different exercise stations.'

I think this would be a good moment to go to a TV montage.

Oh, that hurts a lot.

Is that it?

-Good job.

-Thanks for killing me, guys.

Well, now PT's done, we all go and get a shower and then back to work.

I have a headache.

I do.

I'm blending.

Is that eggy bread? Yes. Oh.

Can I have some of that?

We call it eggy bread at home,

and I just called it eggy bread with these guys.

They don't know what I mean.

Eggy bread doesn't sound very tough. French toast. Thank you.

Oh, this is just like school all over again

and I don't know where my friends are.

Your military-grade forks aren't as tough as I'd expected.

I've just bent it.

-You know where that's from. From PT this morning, you got stronger.

-Already. Bang.

So, what's your mood when you're here?

Better than being deployed.

Yeah. Because, well...

You'd go home every night, drink beer.

Yeah. And, you know, you're not actually in a theatre of war.

But it doesn't not hang over you?

That's just one of those thoughts. It can happen.

So you just enjoy the time that you have, you know, not deployed.

Sorry, I don't want to be sombre over your breakfast.

This is a .50 cal. It's a machine gun.

It fires at up to 100 rounds a minute, effective up to 1,800 metres,

and it's been around pretty much unchanged

since the Second World War,

but it remains a very familiar and very effective weapon.

And I'd love to, you know, give it the old "dukka-dukka-dukka".

But they won't let me. This is the Army.

For some reason, not very trusting. I can see why.

So there's training to be done

and then I get to do the "dukka-dukka-dukka" thing.

It's coming. It's going to happen.

This is the M2 heavy barrel flex machine gun.

It's chambered for the .50 calibre ammunition.

The tank commander's weapon.

It's an intimidating-looking weapon to look at.

It's terrifying to look at.

-That is the scariest looking thing I've ever seen.

-It sounds mean on the battlefield, too.

It's frightening.

I'm going to walk you through clearing and then have you do it.

If I can get an assistant here. Just before I charge,

I'm going to lift up the cover, raise this piece,

it's called the extractor, remove source of ammunition.

Now, I'm inspecting the chamber. Push this button.

That releases the bolt. It goes forward.

I close the cover, and this butterfly trigger right here

is what fires the weapon. I'm going to fire it.

CLICK

-You hear it fire?

-He flinched.

-Any questions on clearing?

-Er, no. So, here we go. Safe.

Open, lift extractor, clear source of ammunition,

replace extractor, uh, right, so that's...and there.

It doesn't work.

Let me give it a try, real quick.

CLICK

'OK. For the sake of everyone's time,

'let's just say I will eventually master the .50 calibre.'

All right, good job. Now, you're ready to fire this .50 cal.

-Fire it for real?

-For real.

-I've earned it?

-You have.

My next step towards my final exam is I get to practice

with the .50 cal for real.

Out here on the range, I have to locate and engage

with the enemy using live rounds in the .50 cal.

And the target - well, it's my enemy.

I mean, look at it, it's just asking for it.

When they give us the go-ahead, we're going to be firing at the van.

Yeah.

-All right, you ready?

-Yeah, yes, I am.

Scouts report you have an enemy personnel carrier in your sector.

Defend your position and report. Out.

Calibre .50.

Here we go! Bring it up! Keep going! Bring it up! There you go!

-Whoa!

-Keep going, keep going.

Calibre .50.

That's it.

-Go ahead and lock and load another can of .50 cal.

-Yeah!

That's White Four, roger.

OK.

All the way back, then let it go right forward.

Come on.

Put some man strength into it.

I am. This is all I have.

LAUGHTER

Sorry, Cap. Made a bit of a hash of that.

Identified PC, calibre .50.

There you go. Bring your right, bring your right.

Calibre .50.

There you go.

I think I got it a couple of times there, didn't I?

Target seeking complete.

There you go.

I can't look. I just can't bear, it's too upsetting. No, wait.

Hang on, I can. I can look. Oh!

Look at it. Look what you did.

Got some holes, yeah, look. This is... It's got some holes in it.

I put that in it there. That was me.

You want to see the back of it.

I can't bear, I can't bear to see it. Oh. Oh, oh, dear.

It definitely does more damage on the way out than on the way in.

Doesn't it just? Now that won't buff out will it?

Just tears it apart.

Oh, we had a camera in here, so we could film.

There was?

Yeah, there was. Yeah. We hit it.

It's all that's left.

There you go. That's...

Another one gone.

'It's day three here at Fort Bliss, Texas, where I've tasked myself

'with mastering the mighty Abrams M1A2 Tank.'

'Now, to pass my final exam and to be able to call myself a tanker,

'I'm going to have to prove that I can act as tank driver,

'tank commander, and gunner.'

Well, today is the day when I was told I get to fire the big gun.

But for some reason they're a bit nervous about me

just jumping in with a box of giant bullets and having a go.

I know, I've got to do some training.

What could go wrong?

Me, this... Anyway, it's their tank.

Oh. They're big.

So, what am I looking at?

This a 120mm ammunition.

This the M829 Alpha2.

Now, you don't have to tell me all that. It's a mouthful.

As it's announced in the fire command, it's sabot.

And it's primary use is for tank and tank-like targets.

So that's a big heavy solid slug that penetrates

and then kind of inputs its weight out back.

Right. The penetrator itself is what you see here.

It's runs down to about this point in the round itself.

This is just what guides it down the tube,

and these petals will actually separate once it exits the gun tube.

So it goes out as a big spike?

It's just a long dart.

This represents the M830 high explosive anti-tank round,

-or HEAT. You've heard of a shape charge before?

-Yes.

Essentially, that what's inside this guy right here.

You've got a copper cone inside here.

You've got a shaper right here at the spike.

When it hits the target, copper cone becomes a slug,

and that slug is what penetrates the armour.

Now this is used for light skin vehicles, bunkers,

fortifications, that type of thing.

This is the M830 ALPHA1 multi-purpose anti-tank round,

MPAT.

This functions very similar to the HEAT round.

However, this has the capability to go to air mode.

You have a ground switch here and an air switch.

If I'm in ground mode,

I'm using it the same way I would use the HEAT round.

Light skin vehicles, bunkers, field fortifications, that sort of thing.

If I switch to air mode, now I can take out choppers.

It's got a Doppler radar inside there.

When it gets in proximity of a target, it's going to explode.

Without actually hitting the target? When it gets near...

Doesn't need to hit it.

So that's a sophisticated item in it's own right.

It's a fantastic round.

Finally, over here, we have the M1028 canister round.

This is basically a shotgun shell.

This is used for troops. It can also be used to remove light

obstacles like razor wire, concertina wire, things like that.

Inside here you got approximately 1,097 3/8th inch,

tungsten steel balls.

So when you fire this guy, you're doing a lot of damage.

If these were live rounds, they would have a sponge covering

over the tip because they're a very, very sharp tip.

You have to be careful, you don't poke your finger.

It's not the biggest danger, almost poking your finger.

Yeah.

Enormous anti-tank round.

-Right, you don't want to hurt your finger.

-Ow!

All right, Richard.

This is the AGTS, the Advanced Gunnery Training System.

When we take you in here, basically this is where the gunner and the

TC hone their skills to get on the range and fire bullets for real.

Right. From out here, it's just a big white box. Lead on.

-Come on in.

-I have no idea what's in here.

Watch your step, there's a lot of headaches in here,

so watch what you're doing.

This is actually where the crew compartment is.

This is where the tank commander sits.

And that's where the gunner's going to sit.

Before I get you in there and start touching stuff,

-I want to show you some stuff real quick.

-OK.

Basically, this is where the instructor operator runs the system.

-When you're looking through your sight, I'll see everything you see.

-OK.

-So, If you want to go in here, I'll show you the gunner station.

-OK.

Gunner station.

'This will be the most intensive part of my training.'

'In this simulator I'll learn to fire the 120mm cannon

'from the gunner's position, and to act as tank commander.'

'Sgt Dilling will be assisting in my training by alternating

'with me at the commander and gunner positions.'

Reach up here and grab that handle and just slide yourself in there.

Oh, it's cosy.

All right. I'll give you a brief once-around-the-world for the switchology here.

Over here, this is going to be your ammo select.

Over here is your gun select switch. This is your blasting machine.

We use this to actually fire the weapon.

And then, basically, all these other controls

are pretty self-explanatory.

OK. That is a crash course.

Yeah.

All right, I'm going to get Sergeant Dilling.

All right, if you guys are set,

you're going to have a squad of troops coming up.

Gauge and report, out.

So you're looking, I'm waiting.

Uh, you can look, too.

-Oh.

-Troops?

-Identified.

CANNON FIRES

-I fired instead!

-No firing yet!

That's why we do this before we go to the range.

You've got to wait until I say fire and adjust.

Yeah, what I wanted to do was say "identify" and give you a range.

Yeah, just the range.

All right, we're rolling. You've got a squad of troops coming up.

All right, you can go ahead and scan, Richard.

I'm scanning.

Ah. Identified, 2.30.

Fire and adjust.

-You've got to say on the way.

-On the way.

All right, scouts report you have an RPG.

-Identified them?

-Ah...

This is horrible!

Come and swing it back right.

The key is to identify them quick. Designate troops.

Identified.

CANNON FIRES

You've got to get quicker.

Yeah.

You've got a squad of troops coming up.

Got them?

-Identified.

-Gunner, troops. Driver, move out.

-As soon as we identify them, you've got to get on them.

-Troops identified, 2.30.

Fire and adjust.

On the way.

All right, target, ceasefire. Back up.

All right. Good job.

-All right. This is your roll-up, here.

-Yeah.

You qualified three out of ten engagements.

-That's not a brilliant score there, is it?

-Nothing to be proud of yet.

I'll get there.

Yeah, we'll get you there. We'll get you there.

OK.

All right. Ready to start over again?

Yeah. Back in the box.

-Good to go?

-Designate target.

CANNON FIRES

Those were bushes.

Yeah. But they were nasty bushes. Identified.

CANNON FIRES

No, it's a tree, it's a tree. Sorry. Can we do that again?

Ouch.

After you, gunner.

It's about time.

I don't know why I'm surprised at how intense

and how difficult that is, but that's central to what you do, isn't it?

Yes, it is. But you did really well.

I also see why you practice it in here.

My mistake at the very beginning of that.

Hey, if we've done that on the range, they'd have pulled us.

I might have got fired.

-Identified.

-CANNON FIRES

Gunner, wait until I say fire and adjust.

Yeah. That was really hard.

That's why we spend hours in here.

Let's do it.

Thanks for your patience.

OK. Great. Slide down in there.

Yeah. Can I hang on there?

Yeah. Just kind of slide right in there.

This is the real deal right now.

-Guys.

-Yeah?

-What if I need to go?

What if you need to go?

Pee.

-You got a water bottle.

-Don't worry.

All right. Let's go.

'Now it's my turn to fire the main gun.

'For this exercise, I'll be using two types of rounds.

'A non-explosive sabot round

'and a canister round, which is basically a massive shotgun shell.'

'Now, I just need to find the enemy.

'Woop! Got 'em.'

That was a convenient target to find lying around here.

Nice and easy. We're going all the way up this dune.

-All right, Richard.

-Yes.

-Are you ready?

So we are firing for real this time?

Yep. This is for real.

Oh, God.

All right.

Don't worry. We'll take care of you.

Arm your laser.

Laser armed.

Now, give me a crew report.

-Sabot autoloader ready.

-Gunner ready.

All right. TC is ready.

Destroyer Mike Golf, this is White Four. We are recon one.

Scouts report enemy PC in your sector, defend and report. Out.

All right. Go ahead and grab the control handles and start scanning.

-Let me know if you see anything.

-All right. PC.

-Range?

-700.

Main gun is armed.

-Fire and adjust.

-On the way.

Target. Target. Cease fire. Driver, back up.

That sounds good.

Waiting for that all day!

-You see the hole you put in the side of it?

-Yeah.

That was good. You hit it centre mass.

How do you describe that feeling?

But if you were to imagine what it's like hitting the button

on a massive tank to fire a huge round, that's what it's like.

Make your way to battle position two, this time. Over.

OK, this next one, we're going to pick up the pace a little bit, OK?

OK.

Take us down the course road.

Scouts report you have an enemy PC with dismount in your sector.

Identified.

PC. Fire and adjust.

On the way. I'm not live.

-Go to main.

-I'm live.

-Fire and adjust.

-On the way.

Target. Target. Cease fire. Whoo! This is White Four.

Engaged and destroyed one PC.

Driver, back up.

You're liking it?

Destroyer Mike Golf, this is White Four,

engaged and destroyed one PC.

Oh. How do you like it Richard?

It's kind of real, isn't it?

How can you do that to that van and say kind of real?

Well, there's nobody shooting back.

Oh, that is a lot of holes.

-Definitely don't want to be on the receiving end.

-No.

Covered the entire length of the minivan.

There's over a thousand of these isn't it? So a lot of these.

But even so, this far out from where the tank was,

gives you an image of how many there are that it's still this dense.

Look, they're just peppered all across the hood there.

It'll do some damage.

Yeah. Sorry, minivan. But it was worth it.

And it serves you right for being a minivan.

That's one less. Come on.

Be proud of the service we provided there.

You're not going to encounter that ugly monstrosity on the road,

are you?

I'm back at the Fort Bliss gunnery range,

only this time it's for my final exam.

So, here's how it's going to work.

I will be put into a simulated battle scenario out there

with four targets to hit.

But I've got to go through that scenario three times

in each of the three key positions.

I'll be acting as gunner, as driver and as tank commander.

So that's 12 potential targets to hit overall,

and here's the thing.

To pass, I've got to hit no less than 11 of them.

I'm allowed one miss. I've got to score at least 11 out of 12.

Out there.

Confident...ish.

Well, this is it. I'm about to do my final exam.

I'm starting off in the driving position, appropriately enough.

I was fairly confident in this position.

Unfortunately, a lot of stuff's happened since,

and I've got to remember.

-OK. You ready to go?

-Yeah.

OK. Destroyer Mike Golf, this is White Four, we are recon one.

Roger. This time set at the beginning of Firebox one.

I'm putting it back in. Service brake.

All right. Let's go. Back straight up. Hold on.

Driver, stop.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

-Sorry, I was putting it in drive.

-What you doing down there?

I didn't have my feet on...

You trying to knock some teeth out?

-I'm sorry.

-You good now?

-Holy cow.

Nice and easy.

Keep going, on right there.

Destroyer Mike Golf, this is White Four. We're set.

White Four, Mike Golf, scouts report enemy PCs in your sector.

Notionally bound to BP two, defend and report.

White Four, roger.

Put it in drive, move out.

I'm driving, I'm driving.

PC, stationary PC.

Fire and adjust.

Whoa!

Target. Identified moving PC.

At your range.

Fire and adjust.

All right.

Target, target. Cease fire and driver stop.

White Four, Mike Golf.

Scouts report enemy truck with dismount in your sector,

bound for checkpoint two.

Engage, report out.

All right, start to move out.

Identified PC.

-PC!

-Fire and adjust.

Target, cease fire. Designate two. Fire and adjust.

Target, target. Cease fire, driver, stop.

Destroyer Mike Golf, this is White Four.

Engaged and destroyed one truck and one set of troops.

White Four, Destroyer Mike Golf.

At this time, clear and elevate all weapon systems, go ahead and make your crew change

and back back up to the beginning of your fire box once you're cleared.

Right, get settled in.

This time, I am the gunner. This is the critical one.

Remember, I'm only allowed a maximum of one miss.

And it's all my responsibility this time. I can't afford to miss.

-You're good to go, Richard?

-Yes, I am.

Destroyer Mike Golf, this is White Four, we are recon one.

White Four, Destroyer Mike Golf.

Scouts report enemy PCs in your sector. Defend and report. Out.

All right. Go ahead and scan.

I got a stationary PC. Designate stationary PC.

PC.

Driver move out.

PC identified. 11.20.

-Fire and adjust.

-On the way.

Target.

-Where is, where is...

-Designate moving PC.

Moving PC identified.

Centre mass, centre mass.

-There you go.

-4.70.

Relay 6.40.

Fire and adjust.

On the way.

Still up.

-What happened? Did I miss?

-Yeah, we missed.

-Cease fire, cease fire.

-Oh.

Well, that's used my one life. I can't afford to miss another.

White Four, roger.

500 metres?

Give me crew report.

-Driver ready.

-Loader ready.

-Gunner ready.

Destroyer Mike Golf, this is White Four. We are recon one.

White Four, Destroyer Mike Golf,

scouts report you have an enemy truck, dismounts reported in sector.

Defend and report. Out.

Go ahead and scan, Richard.

-There you go.

-Looking.

-I got the PC and the troops, I'm going to designate you the PC, OK?

-OK.

PC, designate PC. Driver, move up.

You got 'em?

PC, 9.20.

Up!

-Fire and adjust.

-On the way.

Target, cease fire.

Ha-ha, that's how it's done.

Fire and adjust.

SCATTERED GUNFIRE

Engaged and destroyed one truck and one set of troops.

Richard Hammond signing out of gunner position.

Destroyer Mike Golf, go ahead and make your crew change.

OK.

Last run of the battle scenario,

tank commander.

Everything you need to know about that is in the title,

Tank commander.

I'm in charge. I can't afford any misses.

I've got to hit every one of four targets.

Destroyer Mike Golf, now we are at recon one.

Hamster, Destroyer Mike Golf has got a first engagement.

Scouts report you have enemy light armour moving into your sector.

Defend and report. Out.

What have we got?

Nothing, nothing.

Identified PC.

PC, driver move up.

Wait.

PC, fire and adjust.

On the way.

Identified moving PC.

-Range.

-11.20.

Up.

Fire and adjust.

On the way.

Target, cease fire.

-There you go.

-Driver move back.

-Crew report.

-Loader ready.

-Gunner ready.

-Driver ready.

Mike Golf, this is Hamster, we're recon one.

Hamster, Destroyer Mike Golf, scouts report you have an enemy truck

with dismount support in sector.

Defend and report out.

Identified troops, identified PC.

PC, driver move up.

Right side, 20.

-PC, fire and adjust.

-On the way.

-Ceasefire.

-Identified troops.

Range?

5.90.

All right.

Identified PC, calibre .50.

Bring it up.

Oh, calibre .50.

There you go.

It's OK. I'll pass.

Destroyer Mike Golf, third target PC and troops engaged and destroyed.

Well, that's it. I think that was 11 out of 12. I think I did it.

Let's find out.

Oh!

Uh.

What do you think?

Thank you, all right, lads. Thank you.

LIGHT APPLAUSE

-I've got to tell you, though.

-Yeah?

-You might have got 11 out of 12.

-Yeah.

But the one that you missed...

-Yeah.

-You were off by 600 meters...short.

-That's more than half a kilometre.

-Yeah.

-It's terrible.

-I did not miss by more than half a kilometre.

-You did.

How much did I miss by? Does anyone know for real?

No way. That is more than half a kilometre.

That's a distance your car would measure.

Oh, mind you, in the tank, everything is big, isn't it?

The noise is big, vehicles are big...

Well, it misses by that much.

-It doesn't matter.

-You don't want to miss by that much.

You miss by a big old chunk of distance, and I did.

Well, Richard, or should I say, Hamster.

Yeah, that sort of stuck, didn't it?

You passed your gunner's test, got you in the tank, you shot,

you hit, your fire commands were good.

As far as I'm concerned, you're an honorary tanker,

so, congratulations.

Oh, man, thank you. Thank you, sir. Thank you, sir. It was a big miss.

It was a big miss.

Now, of course, we can't let you go home empty-handed,

so we've got a couple things we want to give you.

Here's your half-cap for your canister round that you shot.

Thank you.

You can shine that up, put it on your desk,

-put it on your garage, wherever you want to put it.

-Thank you.

The other thing I got for you, this is our unit crest,

and it's a stained glass.

As we say here, "Once a regular, always a regular."

Oh, wow, thank you. Thank you. I am touched with that.

Thank you very much indeed.

And I'd like to say thank you to you, Lieutenant Colonel,

for letting us come along and thanks to all the guys.

Normally, at the end of these shows, I'll say,

"Can I take the vehicle with me?"

Do you know what, for the first time,

this comes with too much responsibility. I don't want it!

-Keep it, take it to work and do what you're doing with it.

-Sure?

Yeah, I'm really, really sure.

Really sure. I've tried it. It's an awesome thing,

but you've got to be a special kind of guy to work it.

So I'd like to say on behalf of me, the crew and everybody watching,

thanks to you guys for everything that you do

and carry on doing for all of us, so thank you.