Episode 7 Officially Amazing


Episode 7

Ben, Al and Haruka witness record attempts from around the world. Four lads from Korea demonstrate how to dance with pizza dough.


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Transcript


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Welcome to Officially Amazing,

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the show that features some of the craziest,

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fastest and most dangerous record

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attempts the world has to offer.

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Speaking of which, check out the new Shires-mobile,

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it's pretty much the quickest thing...

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Wow! Wow there!

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Road hog!

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Right, whilst I go chase him down,

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why don't you check out what's coming up on today's show?

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Engine turbo-ised.

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ENGINE MAKES FART SOUND

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Why is this guy dancing with dough?

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Plus, table tennis,

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only without tables or anything resembling tennis.

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But first, the speedy return of an old friend.

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We're here at this former United States Air Force base

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because we need its runway for something a little bit special.

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It's a super speedy record attempt,

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involving an old friend of our and this incredible machine!

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Yes, it's Colin Furze - the fearless inventor who broke the world record

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for the fastest pram on the first ever episode of Officially Amazing!

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Now, Colin's back with this fire-burping monster of a

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machine for an extremely dangerous record attempt.

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Well, he looks confident...sort of.

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Colin, it's great to see you again and back with, well, another

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ridiculous contraption.

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Well, it looks great but can it do the thing that it needs to do?

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Normally, I have a rough idea and I feel a bit of confidence and think,

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"Yeah, its going to do that." Not a clue today!

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-Wow! Well, Colin, I'm going to leave you to get her fired up.

-Cool.

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Here are the rules.

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The vehicle must have go-kart sized wheels

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and be powered by a jet engine.

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The speed must be measured by a speed trap

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and to break this new record,

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Colin's contraption must travel faster than 71mph.

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This is a genuinely dangerous record attempt.

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Colin will be in full safety gear and paramedics are on standby.

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Do not try anything like this at home...

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should you have a jet engine in your shed.

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Colin's on the start line.

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Go, go, go-kart!

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Furze's fire breathing fire cracker is scorching down that runway!

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Colin's onboard speedometer shows he's less than ten miles per

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hour short of the target.

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He's tantalisingly close.

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But oh, no, that looked like some kind of engine misfire!

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Yes, he's slowing down and as he's crossing the finish line

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the speed camera clocks him at just 14.31 miles per hour.

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Didn't quite look 71mph to me.

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No, it cut out. I over-gassed it halfway and then the engine cut.

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Well, you are known for your over-gassing.

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So, I think we'll give it

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-another go.

-Yes, that's the spirit.

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Off you go. Let's get a record this time.

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Furze goes forth once more.

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Can his home-grown greased lightning go-kart bring him yet another

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world record?

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Just listen to that power!

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That's an actual jet engine strapped to the cart

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and Colin is protected from that glowing red-hot pipe by a small

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but effective heat shield.

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Passed 60mph now. He's close!

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Here's what it would look like if you were somehow

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perched on Colin's head, pointing backwards.

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Pretty terrifying!

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Wow! That's why they call it a go-kart and not a slow-cart.

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He's over the line but does he have the record?

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For the record you'd need 71mph.

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That was 61.06 miles per hour.

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-So, we need 10mph. Has it got it

-in it?

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Well, I think there's a couple of things we can do to it.

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So, I'm not giving up yet.

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-OK, excellent.

-So, we'll have another go and see if we

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can find that mystery 10mph.

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Will Colin's hopes and dreams catch fire or go up in smoke?

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We'll find out after this.

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Hiya, we are four guys who think pizza dough is magic!

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-Pizza dough.

-Pizza dough.

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We're in China to see a world record attempt...

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Look at these guys! They're like some kind of pizza-based boy band!

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What are they called?

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Actually, Al, they just work in a Korean pizza shop called Mr Pizza.

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Oh...

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But they are bringing rock and roll

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to the world of bread based fast food!

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I guess.

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Let's get the rules.

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The pizza base must be in contact with the body at all times,

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as it's rolled across the shoulders and the record to beat is 37 rolls.

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And that is a delicious looking pizza!

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Two, one...go!

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And we're off!

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He's like a turbo-charged Korean Harry Potter.

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You're a pizza wizard, Harry!

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A stuffed crust sorcerer.

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A calzone conjurer.

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CLAXON SOUNDS

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Time's up. Did he beat 37 rolls?

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No, just 26.

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Bad luck, Harry.

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Back you go to Pizza Hogwarts.

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Here comes his band-mate.

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-Just two of them are attempting the record today.

-Pizza dough!

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Like with most boy bands, half of them are only there to look nice.

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Al, where's that pizza gone?

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I don't know...mmm-mmmm!

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Two, one...go!

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Just watch him throw that dough, Al!

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He's going so fast,

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he's starting to make one of the hosts feel a bit dizzy.

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He's fast!

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CLAXON SOUNDS

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But was he fast enough to beat that target of 37 rolls?

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Oh, no, he's fallen just short!

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All that delicious dough - ruined for nothing!

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-There's only one word for that, Haruka.

-What?

-Doh!

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Back to Ben.

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So far, Colin Furze's fire squirting go-kart has fallen

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short of the 71mph needed for a new world record.

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This will be the third

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and final chance for Britain's brave answer to the Batmobile.

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Come on, Colin!

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Come on!

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Colin's made some technical tweaks

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and thinks they'll be enough to give him the extra power he needs.

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The early signs are good, this could be it!

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But no, he's signalling to call it off, the engine keeps cutting out.

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Sadly, it's back to the lab, well, shed, for Colin's chariot of fire.

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Colin, it still looked great, though, You must be pleased?

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Well, it looks good and it's an awesome machine

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but just a little bit of tinkering, I might be back here again.

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Still a fantastic effort and still, come on, officially amazing!

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Put there, boy, put there!

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And so Colin pootles home, probably dreaming up his next invention.

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How about a jet-propelled ping pong ball?

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With the two failures so far today, the pressure to deliver some record

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breaking glory rests firmly on the shoulders of our three icons.

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They are many people's favourite, Japan's Mr Cherry!

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Many other people's favourite, America's US Ray.

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And his mum's favourite, our own Sizzling Steve.

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This is...

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Shock waves are still reverberating around the bunker the triple

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disqualification in the plastic cup pyramid challenge last time out.

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No completed pyramids meant no points and the scoreboard was

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stuck in limbo...

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until today.

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Speed, stamina, balance, dexterity, all things that I posses

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in abundance and the kind of skills that our heroes are going

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to need to demonstrate today if they want to compete in

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the record for the...

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First, the team talks.

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What?!

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So, Steve, let's look at your ping pong skills. First things first,

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can you play the game?

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-Yes, I'm quite good at it, actually.

-Really?

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-And how important is that in this record attempt.

-Not at all.

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Meanwhile, it seems Cherry's preparations have been

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a little traumatic.

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How has your ping pong training been?

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-TRANSLATION:

-Practice has not gone very well.

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During training, I accidentally hit

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myself in the face with bat.

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I had a cracking nose bleed.

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I looked silly!

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Good luck, Mr Cherry.

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Yes! Ping pong.

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Sorry, Cherry but this is an athlete's record and this

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is an athlete!

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How's your training going?

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Training's going outstanding.

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We know you have the speed.

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Once you balance and you've

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centred it out, smooth sailing.

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Ping pong, it's on!

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-Boom!

-US Ray!

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Thoughtful thoughts. Now, the rules.

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The ping pong ball and bat must be of standard size.

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If the ball falls, the attempt is over.

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Competitors may not touch the ball and the target for a new

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world record is to run 50 metres in 20 seconds.

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Mr Cherry is up first.

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-I happy!

-Shanta, over to you.

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Go!

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And he's off, those trademark hot-pink tights cutting a

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bright swathe through the British countryside.

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He's at top speed.

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It's like he's running on air!

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Oh, but the ball is bouncing around!

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Can he stop it falling off the bat?

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Yes, he's over the line, what a run!

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HE SCREAMS

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Ping pong, yes-das-das-das!

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-Cherry! Team Japan!

-Japan!

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Here goes Ray!

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Oh, the ball's off already.

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Steve's next and, oh, he's fallen foul to a vicious attack of wind.

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So, everyone has been offered a second attempt.

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But, happy with his time, Mr Cherry says thanks, but no thanks.

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Remember, the target to beat is 20 seconds.

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Go!

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-A very careful start from Steve.

-But he's going through the gears.

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And now he's sprinting, he's actually sprinting!

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In four series of Officially Amazing, we have never,

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ever seen Steve run!

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Come on, Steve!

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Yes!

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Stunning scenes! No-one saw that coming.

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That was a good run with a ping pong ball and a bat.

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It's time for Ray to stuff Steve and bury Cherry!

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Go!

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And the pocket rocket has shot off that start line!

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The ball's bouncing, can Ray control it?

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Down the ragged road, the rapid Ray man ran.

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Try saying that three times, too late, he's finished.

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Excellent, excellent! I've been waiting for that the whole time.

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-All right!

-How did it feel?

-It felt good.

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So, all three thoroughbreds galloped across the line

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with ball and bat intact.

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But who was the quickest and did we get a record?

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Well, I can confirm that all three had valid runs...

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and all three broke the minimum.

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THEY CHEER

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Let's just reflect on that for a moment.

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The Sizzler beat the target in an athletic record,

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unprecedented scenes!

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But who is our winner?

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In third place with a time of 10.029 seconds is...

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-Steve.

-THEY GROAN

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Steve, that's still a great run, man, still a great run!

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Now, there were just two tenths of a second between Mr Cherry and Ray.

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The winner, with a time

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of 8.604 seconds is...

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-Ray!

-CHEERING

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Yes, US rapture for US Ray.

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He claims his first record of the series!

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Congratulations, Ray, that's a new world record title.

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CHEERING

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Oh, Mr Cherry, you got it all ping pong wrong.

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Yes, not going for a second attempt cost him dear.

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So, our three warriors are now absolutely evens Sizzling Stevens,

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with two points and one world record each.

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Join us next time for another does of fully authorised amazingness...

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like this!

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# Well, Colin's go-kart really looked the part

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# The mighty beast even breathed fire

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# He tried time and again

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# But in the end he couldn't hit the speed required

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# Our competitors ping and ponged

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# And Cherry got it wrong

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# He could've done a second run

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# But he didn't and so Ray won

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# And our pizza rolling guys just couldn't deliver...#

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Pizza dough!

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# But here come the rubbish bits, the outtakes! #

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-Naughty Ben!

-You're right, Mr Cherry, shame on you, Ben!

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Which camera am I coming to?

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Does it get louder?

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HE SHRIEKS AND SCREAMS

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Four lads from Korea show us how to dance with pizza dough. Cherry, Steve and Ray combine sprinting with ping pong, and Colin Furze returns to the show with his fiery new invention - a jet-propelled go-kart.


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