Seal Matrix Teacup Travels

Here they come, my two intrepid explorers -

Charlotte and Elliot.

I'm their Great Aunt Lizzie, you see,

and I wonder which one is coming to see me today.

Ah, so it's Elliot's turn.

Here he comes,

racing to hear another tale from an epic adventurer.

CLINK, CLINK, CLINK!

And what wonderful adventures they were,

so long ago and so far away.

I collected a few souvenirs along the way.

But my most precious possession of all

is my extraordinary collection of teacups.

You've still got your coat on, Elliot. Come on.

No time to count the clouds, we've got stories to tell.

Now, let's have a lovely cup of tea.

-But first, we need...

-The teacup!

But which one?

-That one.

-Mmm.

The Seal Matrix.

What a choice, Elliot.

I do really love that story.

This will be just perfect to drink now.

So, are you ready?

Ready!

Then let me tell you the story of Great Aunt Lizzie

And The Adventure Of The Seal Matrix.

HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

Oh, yes, of course!

Let me tell you the story of ELLIOT

And The Adventure Of The Seal Matrix.

It all began long, long ago in ancient Britain,

an island of green forests, majestic mountains, silver rivers

and tiny villages.

Elliot had travelled this magnificent landscape,

past rolling hill and gentle slope

when, finally, he arrived in a village of tiny houses.

The village smelled as fresh as the forest that surrounded it.

As Elliot approached, all was quiet and all was peaceful,

and that was the way it stayed, until...

-You useless great lump.

-Ow!

-I came all the way into town with a man

-who smells like one of his own pigs!

-I told you, I didn't have time.

Then we couldn't find the place.

I've never spoken to the clerk in my life!

-How am I supposed to know where he lives?

-You could've asked someone.

I don't see why we need to sign the letter now, my family have run

-that farm for years without signing a thing.

-Well, you do now,

it's the law. Are you sure you can't read it?

-Nope, I can't read a word.

-Really, Billy? What are we going to do?

Elliot wondered if he could help.

-Excuse me.

-Hold your nose or you'll faint from the smell.

-I can read, if that helps.

-You can?

-But it only says Carmunnock.

Oh, that's the name of the village.

We're looking for the clerk's house.

There's got to be more signs in the village.

And it didn't take Elliot long

before he found what they were looking for.

As the swineherd and his wife went in to see the clerk,

Elliot had an inkling things might not go exactly to plan.

Oh, what is that stench?

Oh, I'm sorry, I'm a swineherd, a pig farmer.

So I gather. THE SWINEHERD CLEARS HIS THROAT

I have a letter I need to sign and give to you.

We have to have it done today, if we're to keep farming. It's the law.

Yes, I'm quite aware of that. Come along, then,

before you have the whole place smelling like a farmyard.

Yes, it all seems acceptable, just sign your name at the bottom

to take responsibility for the farm and then you can be on your way.

-Quickly, man, quickly.

-I can't write.

Well, don't you have a seal matrix?

It's my farm, I shouldn't have to sign a piece of paper!

Well, I'll let you tell that to the king.

No signature, no letter, no farm.

Out, out, I can't stand that smell a moment longer. Good day!

Now look what you've done. Why couldn't you have had a bath?

What difference would that make? I can't sign it, bath or no bath.

They'll stop us farming. They will.

Excuse me, what did he mean about a seal matrix?

-Yes, what was that about?

-It's a little stamp.

-Oh.

-Oh.

My mother has mine.

What?! I didn't know we'd need to bring it

and I don't see why I should have to sign a piece of paper, it's MY farm.

It's not going to be your farm for very long. What are we going to do?

We have to tend the pigs, we can't do that AND go to your mother's.

I could go.

Elliot thought getting a seal matrix from Billy's mother

would be as easy as A, B, C,

but, of course, it was never going to be as easy as that.

She lives in a house in the woods with my little sister.

-Three valleys away, Billy.

-Yes, three valleys away.

What a to-do. The sun was barely up

and already things had got terribly messy.

He'd read out the village sign to the swineherd and his wife...

-Carmunnock.

-..he'd helped them find the clerk,

he'd asked Billy what the clerk meant when he talked about

-a seal matrix...

-It's a little stamp.

-Oh.

-Oh.

..and he had thought getting the seal matrix from Billy's mother

would be a doddle.

He couldn't let the swineherd and his wife lose the farm, could he?

There was nothing else for it but to get cracking,

over the mountain to the little house in the woods.

So, off went Elliot in his old, battered boots.

He scrambled across the ancient Highlands until,

when he was almost out of breath,

the path ran out.

There was only one way to get to the other side.

Elliot took a deep breath.

Safely across, Elliot set off once more.

From between the trees, the valley opened, bathed in the midday sun.

But this was no time to stop and admire the view.

Elliot had to get that seal matrix.

-Hello? Hello?

-What was that?

-Hello?

-Who said that?

Oh, hello.

-I'm looking for the swineherd's mother.

-She's not here.

-I'm his sister.

-Oh, dear. He needs something called a seal matrix.

It's to sign a letter, or else he loses his pig farm.

Forget it, did he?

I knew it, I knew he would need it

but he never came back, troublesome brother.

-It's always one calamity or another.

-Do you know where it is?

Time was ticking by, but all Elliot could do was wait and be patient.

-Luck was on his side - she was back in no time.

-Here it is.

-It's heavy.

-It is, but it's also delicate, so you need to be careful.

-You see that mark on the bottom?

-Mm-hm.

That's to make a signature, for people like me, who can't write.

-So, it'll work for your brother as well?

-Same family, same seal.

It's a handy thing. You just press it into the wax to sign the letter.

-Wax?

-Mm-hm.

-Have you not got any?

-No.

Had you there!

Thank you.

Back came Elliot in his old, battered boots.

Across the ancient Highlands and down the mountainside.

Time had almost run out

when Elliot arrived back outside the clerk's house.

The swineherd and his wife were waiting anxiously.

This time, he was as clean as a whistle.

I got it.

-Oh, thank you, Elliot, thank you.

-Just in the nick of time.

-Billy.

Sorry, thank you.

Well, don't YOU scrub up well?

Still got your letter, but can you sign it?

No, but we've got a seal matrix that Billy's sister gave me.

Very well, just stamp your seal.

And that's exactly what they did.

They pressed the seal matrix deep into the soft wax

and handed the papers back to the clerk.

Congratulations, you can now officially farm pigs.

I think this is the most wonderful thing I have seen in my life.

I don't know how to thank you.

We could start by having some of my famous apple pie.

-Those apples are for the pigs.

-Billy.

-Or we could use them to make apple pie.

-Yes, let's.

And that was that, the whole kit and caboodle.

Elliot And The Adventure Of The Seal Matrix.

-So, William's seal was just like a stamp?

-Exactly.

-And he could sign whatever he liked with it?

-That's right.

-I'll bet he stamped his name all over the place.

-I'll bet he did.

He wouldn't have needed the clerk's help any more.

I'm glad he had a bath in the end, though.

Yes, I think everyone's glad about that.

My goodness, time does fly when you're having fun. Come on.

Your mum'll be here in a minute.

Your coat.

How did that get there?

Home time now, Elliot.

-Thanks, Great Aunt Lizzie.

-Cheery-bye, Elliot.