Episode 19 WHOOPS I MISSED THE BUS

WHOOPS I MISSED THE BUS CBC C112R/01 BRD000000

Calling all CBBC fanatics!

This is your last boarding notice for all passengers travelling

to TV Central, stopping off at Lol Lane and Whoops I Missed The Bus.

-Can this be any more awkward?

-Mum, you're blocking the camera.

Ooh! Ooh! Am I?

Oh, look, it's you lot on the telly!

-BOTH:

-We love CBBC!

And OMD, what on earth is that?

..firing boiling-hot toxic fluids from their bottoms.

Limber up your eyes and activate your lounging muscles, cos

our terrifically talented vloggers are primed and ready to take

-over your tellyboxes.

-Here's a top-secret Rhys fact for you.

The inspiration for all my vlogs is "watch CBBC 24/7".

Oh, and "never leave this room." Keep that to yourself, though, yeah?

Now, take out your notebooks and prepare yourself for an

education from our favourite vlogging duo.

It's Myles and his lovely teddy bear!

Copycats is a whole show where you photocopy cats.

-It's not that.

-Meow.

-It's a game show, Copycats.

-Meow.

Ten seconds. Not a long time.

OK, Daniel, your turn.

Rule number one of Copycats, just as a heads up - if you're inviting

a family member onto the show, make sure they know the

difference between a boomerang and an elephant's tusk.

-Daniel?

-An aubergine.

LAUGHTER

It is not an aubergine. What is it supposed to be, Alex?

-It was a boomerang.

-LAUGHTER

Brief your family before the quiz, if you can.

OK, what is this?

Ooh, that one's a banana.

It's a boomerang!

A...yellow boomerang.

OK, what's this one?

- That's a banana. - That's an elephant's tusk.

It's an elephant's tusk?

None of these are bananas.

I'm so sorry.

-Reckon you can draw that?

-Yeah.

This is a tennis racquet. And they're asking for a tennis RACKET.

LOUD MUSIC AND SHOUTING

OK, just stop making all this... Please stop making all this racket.

-MUSIC AND SHOUTING STOPS

-That's good. Thank you.

But actually, you can spell racquet both ways, Myles.

Really? R-A-C-K-E-T.

It's true. There are the results.

The internet never lies. I mean, that is a bit rude.

Come on!

This isn't even a tennis racquet in the first place. That's squash.

Different sport. Similar racquet, so I thought I could get away with it.

I do not have the props.

Thank you, Myles. Talk about making a racket.

Or should that be "racquet"? HE LAUGHS

Now, to follow in Myles's vlog-star footsteps,

it's over to you, my 15 Second Fans.

I really, really love Copycats.

It's when two families compete against each other,

and it makes me have a laugh. I love Copycats!

Get in!

My favourite programme is The Next Step, cos it has loads

of drama and it's really good at dancing, and I love dancing, too.

And I really like Amanda, Emily and Riley.

I also like 4 O'Clock Club, because there's loads of rapping,

and my favourite character's Clem.

Well done!

Today I'm sending you a 15-second vlog to say I really like

The Official CBBC Chart Show, because I really like singing

and I really like Sam Smith as an artist.

-Nice one!

-We love CBBC.

-And we love The Next Step.

-And The Dumping Ground.

-Can't wait for more episodes!

-BOTH:

-We love CBBC!

Now, that was impressive!

Have you got a lot to say about your favourite CBBC show?

Well, if you do, record your very own mini vlog and send it to

us through the Whoops web page.

Now, TV is renowned for being gorgeously glamorous, so I thought

I'd treat you to a compilation of the blingiest moments on CBBC.

But there were none. So I put together this disgusting display.

Warning! If you're eating, stop now.

Seriously, this is going to be a bit gruesome.

Here it is, especially for you,

a revolting reel of only the most repulsive moments from CBBC.

Ooh, pass us the sick bucket, madam.

At number five, kicking off our creepy countdown

and winning the acclaimed title Ha! That's Gross,

it's The Next Step with this laugh-out-loud vom-tastic scene.

Eurgh...

Sorry, I was in there. I was drinking from the fountain,

but the water's really strong.

-There's no faucet in there.

-Yeah, there is.

It's right beside the toilet.

-Did you drink from the bidet, bro?!

-Euw!

Eldon just drank out of the bidet!

-What's a bidet?

-THEY BOTH GAG

People use the bidet after they use the toilet. AFTER!

Sliding in at number four,

prepare yourself for the Eurghhh! Face Scrunch Award,

which goes to this slice of Horrible History.

-You're home early. How was your day at work?

-Oh, not bad, Mummy.

-Mustn't grumble, mustn't grumble.

-Well, it certainly smells like

you collected enough dog poo for the leather tanner.

Yeah, and then the boss told me to stir all the poo in the tub.

Oh, you're moving up in the world, darling.

-Before you know it, he'll be paying you, as well.

-Cor, imagine!

At number three, it's The Palm Shield And Peak Award,

and this little reptile from Deadly 60 is literally seeing red.

When under attack, they mix chemicals in their body,

firing boiling-hot toxic fluids from their bottoms.

By pulsing the jet 500 times a second,

it can keep its rear end just cool enough that it doesn't scald itself.

But any predator is not so lucky.

At number two, our Eyes Shut Tight And Fingers In Your Ears Award,

which goes to Operation Ouch!

We're in the doctors' capable hands.... Or rather, feet.

'First, Nutern has to cut off all the dead, hard skin.'

This bit doesn't hurt at all.

It's slightly ticklish, but it's actually quite pleasant.

So long, verruca.

'Now my foot's going to get frozen.

'This is liquid nitrogen, which helps kill off the virus.'

Worming its way to the top spot, picking up

the Hide Behind Your Pillow And Never Come Out Again Prize, it's a

Wild And Weird creature I guarantee you won't have met at a zoo.

Amazing footage from Thailand shows an unexpected catch from

a fisherman's net.

But it's what happens next that is truly unexpected.

This week's So Awkward is about the best thing ever.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

I hope you're thinking of cake, because that's what it's about!

You were thinking of cake, right? Yeah?

Well, I bet you are now!

I'm going to be running a cake stall at the Healthy Eating Food Festival.

We'll impress all your friends by selling them

wearing home-made banana outfits.

Did she say Healthy Eating Food Festival?

Oh, no, please don't tell me that involves something gross,

like beetroot cakes.

This delight is beetroot, cherry, strawberry, tomato,

and the secret ingredient, a lot more beetroot!

Honestly, I'd never have realised what an amazing cook Lily's mum is.

Oh, no! You know those things can dye your lips?

Whoa! It looks like you're wearing lipstick.

Oh, Martha, it's OK. I learnt the exact same way, too.

Except I was a lot more greedy.

It says here this could take up to two days to come off! Oh, no!

You don't have to worry. I'd never embarrass you at school, OK?

Now, scoot!

I love you, Lily Silky Bum-Bum!

And what is it with parents saying they won't embarrass you -

and they always do? When I'm filming at home

-and trying to pretend I'm really cool...

-Hi, Laura! Hiya!

-Mum, you're blocking the camera.

-Ooh! Am I?

-Yeah.

-Sorry... Bye!

Yeah, bye, Mum. Bye.

I was going to say "interrupt me", but at least you didn't hear

-any nicknames.

-Bye, Lauzie-Loos!

Yeah, that's my actually nickname. I didn't just make that up

-for this blog. But at least it's not as bad as...

-Lily Silky Bum-Bum.

Can a mum nickname make you sound tougher?

You lookin' to me, you lookin' to me?

You are talking to Lauzie-Loos.

No, it doesn't work!

And I love how much fun Jas and Lily's mum are having

when they bake! Can all baking be like this, please?

And I really like Mrs Griggs' idea of recording everything.

Why have I never thought of that?

'Speak to Martha Fitzgerald sternly about her recent behaviour.

'Is carrying the weight of the whole school's expectations,

'ahead of the most important chess match EVER, causing her to rebel?'

Hmm, now I can remember everything.

Laura, remember to make your bed. Remember to brush your hair.

Remember to... I'm actually out of things.

Laura, remember to start thinking of more things to remember.

So, mums are pretty awesome, but they can still be embarrassing,

especially if they are making beetroot cakes like Lily's,

or you are sat in your room filming...

Laura, I've made some beetroot cakes.

Chocolate, vanilla, lemon...

Remember to ask for any other flavour next time.

Fine! More cakes for me, Lauzie-Loos!

And remember to get a new nickname.

Danger Mouse is, without a doubt,

the coolest rodent

on the face of the Earth. Even I wished I was a mouse

when I used to watch it. Even our parents wished they were mice

when they watched it. I mean, just look at this guy!

MUSIC: Danger Mouse theme

The swag on this dude! Who else do you know that could

pull off an eye patch and a turtleneck and, yet,

not look like the villain?

Think about it. Those are classic villain trademarks and, yet,

Danger Mouse rocks them, anyway, just cos he can.

Danger Mouse - breaking stereotypes since 1981.

Other things on the DM's list of cool

-is that he has his own narrator.

-'And so, the world's greatest

'secret agent courageously sneaks into his best friend's room

'and rummages through his stuff.'

I'm looking for clues!

How cool would it be to have someone narrating your life?

CRICKETS CHIRRUP

LOUDLY: 'And, as Rhys sneaks back home, WAY past his bedtime,

'it seems he might have actually gotten away with it!'

-ADULT MALE:

-Rhys, you're grounded!

-Oh!

Is it too much to whisper?

Actually, maybe narrating isn't for everybody.

'Oh, come on, you've barely given it a chance!'

No, go away! Of course Danger Mouse also has his

trusty sidekick, Penfold, to watch his back.

In fact, Penfold seemed to be getting very popular

-in this week's episode.

-Penfold, I think your fans

may have found out where you live.

I just can't get enough of the crazy characters that DM and Penfold

fight every episode. For instance, that giant TV...

Watch out! Remote control!

They've paused us!

-Hey, Rhys, what are you doing?

-I'm just... I'm just working.

-Cool!

I love computers. I love the clicky sound of it,

when you are tapping along on the keyboard.

I always find it very soothing. It's...

Ah, that's better!

I think the coolest thing about Danger Mouse is how calm he stays

under pressure, no matter how tough it gets.

Reminds me of myself.

Let's do this!

Phwoof!

Getting a bit warm in here.

Steady.

Steady.

No-o-o-o-o-o!

OK, so, maybe I have got a long way to go before I am

actually Danger Mouse. But I can start with his wardrobe.

Turtleneck, that I borrowed from Blue Peter's Shelley.

Let's just hope she doesn't notice it's missing.

And an eye patch!

Pretty cool, yeah?!

-'I'm not really feeling it myself.'

-Are you still here?!

Good job, old chap! A fitting performance for the

notorious Danger Mouse, indeed.

Next up, we are going from a super mouse to a chatty catty

and a gossiping guinea pig! It's time for...

Ah, Danger Mouse, my greatest enemy. See how he taunts me with his

flashy car and adorable sidekick, Olivia! Well, I'll show him!

Monty the moggy will not be beaten! Well, I'll go after this episode.

But then! But then, lunch. Well, we'll see, if I'm not too full

after lunch, hmm.

Copycats is the best show on CBBC. Turn around, you're missing it!

No, the best show on CBBC is Wolfblood!

-Aaa-oooow!

-Sssh, I can't hear the TV.

And stop howling! You're not a wolfblood.

Yes, I am, aren't I, Keira?! You're just a grumpy morwool.

Felicity, I have got fantastic news!

I have been offered a job at Dockbridge High. I am joining

the excellent teaching staff on Class Dismissed.

Subject - the historical use of canines to alert their owners

of a guest's arrival, seeing the postman and loitering

in a neighbourhood of cats.

I'm just warming up to dance along with The Next Step. Right...

I'm ready to backflip, or rather, catflip!

All around the room.

Oh, wait, there is a box in my performance space.

I cannot work like this, Saskia!

Would you like you see your fluffiest friend on the telly?

Send us a short clip of your pet watching CBBC

through the Whoops web page and we will make them talk and that!

Hold on to your hats, cos I have arranged an action-packed

treat for your eyes and ears. It's a pocket-sized portion of the

creme de la creme from CBBC this week!

Is there any way I can see what it is like to be partially sighted?

We can try. We have these here. These demonstrate a little bit

-about what it is like for one type of blindness.

-I can see shapes,

but can't really focus on anything.

-Shall I try these on?

-Yeah, sure. This will put an image into the

-central part of your field of view.

-Wow.

So, straight away, I can see a lot more detail.

I can see your face, I can see your glasses.

I can even see you smiling.

Disaster. This is the worst possible start.

I have to put this out of my mind and get on with it.

-OK.

-First up, two sets of 90-degree turns.

Right.

Yes!

Now, left...

Good start!

But now the tricks get hard.

The dreaded 180.

I have to turn and ski backwards twice!

That's one!

And...there's the other!

Yes!

K. Eh, you can find keys in the house.

L. The loo!

Yeah! You can find the loo!

-M!

-You've got M.

-Money.

-Money! You can find a bit of money.

-Maybe in a little dish or...

-Only if you're lucky.

I have got N. N...

N...for...

Eh...N-n-n-n-n...

No, stop! That's it!

Alas, we have reached the end. But do not despair.

There is a whole load of goodies waiting for you over on

the CBBC iPlayer and website. What lucky human beings

you all are. Perfect timing, here comes the bus now! No, it's gone!

Hello? Auntie Maureen, I'm going to be late for bingo again...