Episode 12 Angry Boys


Episode 12

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Transcript


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This programme contains very strong language.

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Yeah, it's weird. Like, I had this idea of shit that's going to happen,

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and it's going to be, like, all good, an' that,

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and then...

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like, it doesn't happen.

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If you think about it, it's kinda weird that

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I actually thought that they were going to come to Dunt.

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And Mum and Steve kept telling me they weren't going to come.

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I didn't believe them.

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Yeah, it's shit when adults are right and kids are wrong.

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It's fucking heavy!

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-Well, fucking get Nathan.

-We're stuck.

-Oi, Nathan!

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'Nate's going to deaf school tomorrow. He's fully deaf now, so he's got to go.'

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Someone wave their hands in front of Nathan and get him to help us!

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Have you got another lettuce there?

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Cos I think we'll churn through those two.

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Nathan, get out here!

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Nathan? Nathan! Daniel wants you to go and help him out with the bunks.

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Yes.

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'And we're going to be moving my gran

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'into Jamie and Tyson's bedroom.'

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Yeah, good one(!)

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So this'll be a three-boy room, and Gran's going to get her own room,

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cos when you're an old lady you kinda need your own room.

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Two, four, six, eight, ten...

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'It's fun having Gran here, though, just having her round the house,

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'cos I get along with her heaps.

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'I thought she was going to be heaps more sick, right?

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'I thought she'd be...'

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kinda dribbling and, erm...

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shaking and stuff.

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'But she's all right so far.'

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We should keep that covered. The flies are getting in.

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'I've been settling in quite well, yes.'

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The family thought I was going to be

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much more of an invalid than I actually am.

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I'm, er, I'm forgetful, but I'm certainly no invalid.

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'Kerry's been great. She's been fantastic. No tension there.'

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Are those Jamie's cargoes there?

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'And I've got along quite well with Steve, too, her new husband.

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'He's a lovely bloke.'

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Get it round the other side of the ute.

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'So, all in all, so far so good.'

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No, it's nice. I've put photos up.

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'When you are lost,'

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family is where you turn, and this is my family.

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This is all the family I've got.

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And, er...

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it's... I feel like I'm in a safe place.

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So, how are you?

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'Well, Daniel's hooked me up with the computer,

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so I've been keeping in touch with Garingal.'

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He's loving the country.

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Daniel said he'd build a run for him out the back, so that's good.

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'Penny and I are very close.'

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So...

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Not an easy separation, that one.

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So I like to, y'know...

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..chat with her as much as I can.

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Hello! Hello, Penny!

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'I do feel terrible about Daniel's party plans for Nathan

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and forgetting to invite those special guests.'

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Get on the end of that.

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'Daniel's trying not to make me feel guilty.'

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But I do feel quite responsible.

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It's not a good situation there at all.

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That'll blow out.

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'We're still going ahead with Nathan's farewell party.'

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Just doing it this arvo, y'know, with me mates, keeping it low-key.

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'Mum's invited the Lovells, our neighbours, over,

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'just people that know Nath

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'and care about him.

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'Nath's been such a little shit lately, though.'

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He's been naughtier than ever before just cos he knows he's going.

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'He's been a dickhead to me.'

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Just come over here.

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-Stand there.

-Why's he want a fucking photo of me?

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For deaf school. Let me take the photo. Go back further.

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-It's fucking weird.

-There!

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-'He's showing off heaps for Gran.'

-Ready?

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You fucking little faggot!

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I got it on the camera!

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Fucking arsehole! You fucking dirty faggot!

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Piss funny! Piss funny!

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-He's just having fun.

-You try getting pissed on!

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I got it on camera!

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Piss funny!

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'Well, he's out there in the big ol' world again, he's on his own.'

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Go down here.

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'Has Shwayne learned his lesson after being in jail?'

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'I don't think that Shwayne has the ability to learn.'

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I was talking to Clarice,

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and we were talking about the fact that Shwayne may be retarded...

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and we just didn't get the tests.

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Life on the outside, y'know, is cool.

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It's different to how I remember it, though.

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-That's cos you ain't as famous any more, nigga.

-Shut the fuck up.

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D'you know what? We finished my new track, Squashed Nigga.

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We finished all that up. Full production on that.

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-We got that... Where's that CD? You got that CD?

-Uh-huh.

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Rockin' it with my glasses.

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And we got this shit out to the radio stations,

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to the record companies.

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We got, y'know, we got no bites yet, but...

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it's a new sound, it's a new song,

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and I firmly believe it's going to take a while

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for that shit to...

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to get into the brains of the people, y'know what I'm saying?

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# Squashed nigga, squashed nigga... #

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'Am I happy to have said goodbye to S.mouse? Yeah.

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'I'm happy about that.'

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He is over. He is gone. There ain't no more S.mouse.

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Y'know? He is a memory in my head,

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because I'm moving on from that shit.

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'Y'know? I don't miss being him. You want to know why?

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'Because that's not who I am. I'm Shwayne Junior.

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'Being adored by fans, having people, y'know, hysterical

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'and chasing you round the shopping malls,

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'all that shit, I don't miss that. No way!

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'If you don't recognise me'

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cos I'm being me, then that's fine by me. Y'know what I'm saying?

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-Pull over here.

-There?

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'I'm very much willing to put the past in the past

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'and focus on the future.'

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Wind the window down. See if they recognise me.

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Yeah, here they come.

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He knows me. He knows me.

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No, no, no, no.

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What the fuck?

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'Cos I am a creative being, y'know what I'm saying?'

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I got to create shit,

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no matter what goes down, no matter who kicks me in the ass

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and says, "Your shit is shit." Y'know?

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I turn round to them and I say, "I'm going to create shit forever."

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'I got so much going on I don't know where to start.'

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So, what you want to do now, nigga?

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I don't know.

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'I don't think I've ever had a more eventful month in my life.

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'It's been unreal. So much shit's happened.'

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I had my court case over the Packo shooting.

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Lucky for me Packo told the truth,

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said I wasn't there, so I ended up getting off.

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Yeah, Ashleigh's got nailed for that, so he's gone back inside.

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Straight after the court case, I decided to go for my surgery.

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So yeah, I had my artificial-balls operation. Got my balls again!

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It didn't hurt as much as I thought it would.

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And the results are amazing. Looks pretty realistic, don't you reckon?

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-My balls?

-Yeah, they're totally realistic, yeah.

-Yeah!

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'I don't know, I feel like I've got this new confidence.'

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I think I just love having balls again.

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'I've restarted the Fat Boys Surf School.

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'I worked out that if I got the Mucca Mad Boys involved as instructors,

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then it was going to be way easier.'

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How you boys going?

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'Yeah, so I've got a ratio of two Mad Boys'

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to each Fat Boy, so yeah, it's been going unreal so far.

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-Here comes a big one.

-Waiting for that tide to come in.

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'It's good for the town, too -

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'it's keeping the Mad Boys off the streets,

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'keeping them busy, giving them a purpose,

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'stopping them from scaring the tourists off.'

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Yay, guys!

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'But the biggest news is Kareena's back,

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'and she's had a baby!'

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Go slow, you two.

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'We had our ups and down and downs leading up to the birth of Tyrone,

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'y'know, a lot of arguments.'

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I put it down to hormones,

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cos apparently, in the last trimester,

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the chicks go a little bit weird.

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Here he is, little Tyrone!

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Say hi to the cameras, little fella.

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-He's cute, isn't he?

-Little man!

-Yeah, Tyrone.

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We were going to call him Blake, but I thought that might be a bit lovo,

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mini-Blake.

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So we went with Tyrone. It's so good, though. I highly recommend it.

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If you ever get the chance to have a baby, have one.

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-It's awesome.

-It's really changed him. Like, he's been really...

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We had a really good chat

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about Blake pulling back on his gang commitments

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and just focus on being a good dad.

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Like me and Hunter was saying,

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when Tyrone grows up - well, not even when he grows up, NOW -

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he's got instant membership into Mucca Mad Boys.

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-Even if he's a shit surfer, he's in.

-He's in, no matter what.

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Yeah, we'll get him the tattoo when he's about ten or something.

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-What? Only when he's about 18.

-No, ten. Like, it doesn't hurt.

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-Doesn't hurt.

-Are you serious?

-You want a tattoo?

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-You want a tattoo, do you?

-No, Blake.

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All I'm saying is that you'll run out of money eventually.

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-No, I'm not.

-You can't sustain this lifestyle, man.

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You got to get you a real job.

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I don't need no real job.

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You said you liked my new track, anyway. Why you lose faith in me?

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Look, you are not getting it.

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-Your fans have deserted you, man.

-Tch!

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I mean, look, I'm not trying to be harsh or nothing,

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-but nobody likes your ass no more.

-No-one likes YOUR ass, motherfucker!

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You got no friends.

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That's why you're here sitting on my steps,

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-cos you got no friends.

-Shut up, boy.

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-Everyone likes me.

-Listen to me, Son. I've been studying this.

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-Bobby McFerrin - you remember, Don't Worry Be Happy?

-No.

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He's a IT consultant in Seattle right now.

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-Bullshit.

-And the little short girl on Family Ties,

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she's working the streets.

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-That's all I'm saying.

-You're making shit up.

-OK...

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OK, I made that shit up. But this shit is true! This is true, man.

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People who used to be famous, they have to get themselves a real job.

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I ain't going to be one of those people!

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-That's what you don't understand.

-Shwayne, get a real job.

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Get a real job. Let me help you get a real job.

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Get a real friend!

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Get someone your own age to hang out with

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instead of hanging out with me and Danthony, y'know?

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-Go home!

-I'm not hanging out with you.

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-I don't want to hang out with you.

-Why you here, then?

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What's wrong with you? Ain't you got no respect? I took care of your ass.

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I respect you, motherfucker.

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I respect you more when you back your car out of my driveway and go home.

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Tim is much happier these days. We left Japan.

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He bought his very own place back in Santa Barbara.

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And, um, the great thing is that now he's back with all his old friend.

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He really come a long way.

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He's 16, and he's very own man now.

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You go down, and you come back, and you flip it.

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'The great thing is, being his manager

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'has been an amazing experience for me.'

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I'm very happy, and I think Tim is happy too.

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-You want me to organise you a minivan?

-Yeah!

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-OK!

-Thanks, Bruce!

-Yes!

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'Everything's been great since I moved back here in Santa Barbara.

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I've gotten new management. I'm back into skating'

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more competitively now.

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I've actually been skating more than I ever did in Japan, too.

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'Me and Amaya are doing well.

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'We're going to have a long-distance relationship.

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'Her parents are letting her stay with me during school breaks.

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'My mom's back here too.'

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Um, we don't really see each other much.

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She's pretty pissed off about the whole firing thing.

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I bought her a house here, so I think she's doing fine.

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My life has been turned upside down.

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The lawyers got involved, and Tim has really fucked me up big time.

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They claim that Tim is the one who get all the money,

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so until we sort that out, I'm pretty much stuffed.

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'Tim has bought us a family home in Santa Barbara,

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'but let me tell you, this house is shit.'

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Is not big enough to swing a dog's dick.

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It's got four bedroom upstairs. Look at this living room.

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Is not exactly living it up.

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Get off the floor, please. The floor is not for sitting on!

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Take the dog to do a shit.

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'Well, we had a lot of excess Gay Style stock left over,

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'but I've found it quite useful for decorating round the new house.'

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The cock cushions just as scatter cushion, erm, like so.

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We have, erm, just a cock box here where I put my remote.

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Oh, and I have my lychee lickable runners. So, that's what I wear.

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They're comfy for around the house, too!

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'I had to sack my housekeeper, Cho,

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'so now I have to take on full duties of housekeeper and home mum.'

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Sit up straight, please.

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'And I have to tell you,

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'being a household mum is shit.

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'You have to constantly look after your children.'

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Drink for you.

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'Cindy is a very difficult child.

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'She cause a lot of trouble for me. Very naughty.'

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'I give Tim everything. I give him money, success, a future.'

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And what does he give me in return? A shit house in the suburbs.

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Thank you very much, Tim(!)

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'Luckily, my second son, Luke, is doing very well.

0:14:250:14:29

'I still home-schooling him so he can focus on his golf practice.'

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You have to try hard if you want to be Tiger Woods.

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'He wants to go pro one day, so I am doing my best to encourage that,

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'and we see how we go.'

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Look! Look what we got today!

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'The role of a mother is a very, very hard one.

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'I've learned that.

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'You have to do your very best for your children.

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'You have to devote your life to them.'

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Hold the balls.

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'I'm not perfect. No-one's perfect.'

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I'm just a mother trying to do my very best.

0:15:090:15:13

And if you don't like that, then...that's not my fault.

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Jump in.

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'Me and Nath, we're going into town for final farewells.

0:15:250:15:28

'As a special treat, I'm letting Nath drive.

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'We've been training up around the farm. He's getting pretty good.

0:15:310:15:35

'If we do get busted, then I'm going to tell the cops

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that I'm Nath and he's Daniel, cos we look the same,

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so they won't be able to tell. It won't stand up in court.

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You want to do mainies for a while?

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It's the last time you're going to see Dunt, mate.

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Should say goodbye to Chloe.

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HORN TOOTS

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See you, Nathan!

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What the fuck did you do that for?

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Fucking knob.

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She's hot!

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'We're going to do the traditional shit, do all the stuff Nath loves

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'just for one last time...'

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YEAH!

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'..visit the places Nath likes...'

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Hurry up!

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'..just do all the stuff that you can do in Dunt.

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'Probably go to the tree where Dad died.

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'Me and Nath go there a fair bit. It's weird and a little bit gay,

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'but, like, I talk to Dad at the tree sometimes.

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'It's just a secret thing that we do.

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'Sometimes we don't even tell Mum.

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Uh, g'day, Dad. Just, um, wanted to bring Nath over.

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Yeah, he's leaving in the morning, and Steve's driving him,

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so just wanted to bring him over to say see ya an' that.

0:16:440:16:47

Um...

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Oh, we had this farewell party planned for him,

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and we invited all these legends.

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You'd have loved it. We had Blake Oakfield, your favourite surfer.

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We had these other blokes - you wouldn't know them -

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a rapper and a skater.

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They were all going to come, right?

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But Gran, your mum, she forgot to invite them,

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so...they're not coming.

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It's still going to be good, cos the Lovells are coming

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and my mates and...

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Yeah, it'll be good.

0:17:170:17:18

Um, Dad, seeing, like, y'know how...

0:17:200:17:23

I said that me and Nath...

0:17:230:17:25

were going to run the farm, an' that, like...

0:17:250:17:29

when we left school, just get it all successful and shit?

0:17:290:17:32

Now Nath's going to deaf school, it doesn't look like we can do that.

0:17:320:17:36

But I was thinking, like...

0:17:390:17:43

..we're not really, like, men yet, we're sort of still a bit like kids,

0:17:440:17:48

so when Nath comes back in, like, two years,

0:17:480:17:53

we'll be more like men that'll be, like, stronger and just...

0:17:530:17:57

know more shit, an' that,

0:17:570:17:59

so that's when we'll do it.

0:17:590:18:01

We'll definitely do it.

0:18:010:18:03

We'll get it all up and running and successful and...

0:18:030:18:06

and do all the shit we promised, so...you don't have to worry.

0:18:060:18:09

Erm...

0:18:120:18:13

Yeah, that's it. So...

0:18:140:18:17

Nath wants to, um, have a word,

0:18:170:18:19

and he's got a photo that he wants to leave with you

0:18:190:18:22

so you don't forget him while he's gone. So...cool. See ya.

0:18:220:18:25

Oi, Nathan! Not there, dickhead!

0:18:560:19:00

Get in the car.

0:19:000:19:02

Fuck's sake!

0:19:020:19:04

Hey, nigga, after you've finished vacuuming my car,

0:19:110:19:14

I'm going to get you to polish my balls.

0:19:140:19:16

You can shut the fuck up, man.

0:19:160:19:18

I wouldn't let you do that even if you wanted to, nigga.

0:19:180:19:21

How'd you like to be locked in?

0:19:230:19:24

You locked in there?

0:19:260:19:28

What's happened here? Is it some kind of malfunction with the door there?

0:19:280:19:32

-Open the fucking door, man!

-What's going on? Can't get out?

0:19:320:19:35

You know what? I'll let you out of there

0:19:350:19:38

if you rap my biggest-selling...

0:19:380:19:40

my second-biggest-selling single in the United States. Rap that.

0:19:400:19:44

-Then I'll let you out.

-# You at the animal zoo... #

0:19:450:19:48

I can't believe you did that shit, motherfucker.

0:19:500:19:53

You still do that shit, motherfucker?

0:19:530:19:56

-You crying? Are you crying?

-You can do the rest yourself.

0:19:560:19:59

There's no need to cry about that, motherfucker!

0:19:590:20:02

Don't fucking do that shit. Don't fucking hit me with that shit.

0:20:040:20:07

Don't fucking do that. You want to fucking...

0:20:070:20:09

Hey, hold up, hold up, hold up.

0:20:090:20:11

RADIO: '..is actually S.mouse. All right? That's his real name.

0:20:110:20:15

-Nigga!

-'Now he's got this new song.

0:20:150:20:17

'You let me know what you think.

0:20:170:20:19

'Crazy record. I hear new records all the time.'

0:20:190:20:21

-They're talking about the track.

-'Let me know what you think about this.'

0:20:210:20:25

'This is new music from Shwayne Junior.

0:20:250:20:29

Motherfuck!

0:20:290:20:31

# What's really me? Yeah What do I want to be?... #

0:20:310:20:36

I fucking told you! I fucking told you! I told you!

0:20:360:20:41

-Motherfucker, they playing your song!

-Yeah, yeah!

0:20:410:20:44

Yeah! I said that. They got my fucking demo. Motherfuck!

0:20:440:20:49

# Then a truck smashed through his door, brother

0:20:490:20:54

# No, nigga, it's true... #

0:20:540:20:56

I'm going to be rich, Dad! I'm going to be fucking rich!

0:20:560:20:59

A recording motherfucking artist!

0:20:590:21:01

# Squashed nigga, squashed nigga

0:21:010:21:05

# I feel like a squashed nigga

0:21:050:21:09

# Squashed nigga... #

0:21:090:21:11

'The Fat Boys Surf School, it's going off. I'm stoked with the progress.

0:21:110:21:15

'Yeah, we've had way less broken boards,

0:21:150:21:17

'and we're getting a few of the young blokes up and standing.'

0:21:170:21:21

APPLAUSE

0:21:210:21:23

Well done, mate!

0:21:240:21:26

Standing! Did you see him surfing?

0:21:260:21:28

'It's good to do something for the community, to be giving back.'

0:21:280:21:31

Who would've thought?

0:21:310:21:33

I've decided recently to give surfing a go again.

0:21:330:21:36

'I'm going to come out of retirement and, er, make a comeback.

0:21:360:21:40

'I've agreed to do the Billabong Legends of Surfing tour.

0:21:400:21:44

'So yeah, I've been in training for that.'

0:21:440:21:46

There goes my dad!

0:21:460:21:48

I think it's the new balls.

0:21:480:21:50

I think my new balls have given me a sort of confidence.

0:21:500:21:53

Oi, Packo's up there.

0:21:530:21:56

He must have heard.

0:21:560:21:57

What a dickhead.

0:21:580:21:59

'Today's a big day, actually,

0:21:590:22:01

'cos I've decided that I'm going to surf Blakey's.

0:22:010:22:04

'It's probably the first time in about ten years I've done that.'

0:22:040:22:08

All right, boys, let's go!

0:22:080:22:10

Oi, Packo! This'll teach you for shooting my balls off! I'm back!

0:22:100:22:16

'I'm shitting myself a little bit,

0:22:160:22:17

'but it's going to be good to reclaim it.'

0:22:170:22:20

-Mucca-Mucca-Mucca!

-Oi-oi-oi!

-Mucca-Mucca-Mucca!

-Oi-oi-oi!

0:22:200:22:25

-Mucca!

-Oi!

-Mucca!

-Oi!

0:22:250:22:28

-Mucca-Mucca-Mucca!

-Oi-oi-oi!

0:22:280:22:30

Daniel, the Lovells just called.

0:22:400:22:42

They're not going to be able to make it to the party, so it's just us.

0:22:420:22:46

-Did you hear what I said, Daniel?

-Yeah.

0:22:460:22:49

Grub's up, fellas. Chips and sambos.

0:22:490:22:51

Did you want to chuck this on the fire, man?

0:22:510:22:53

Yeah, might as well burn it.

0:22:530:22:55

'Er, Steve and Nathan are leaving first thing in the morning

0:22:550:22:58

'to go to Adelaide, getting up real early, an' that.

0:22:580:23:01

'I don't know if I can be fucked getting up for it.'

0:23:010:23:04

I just hate the big, gay farewell shit, an' that.

0:23:040:23:07

So probably won't get up.

0:23:070:23:09

It's going to be weird not having Nathan round, though.

0:23:100:23:13

Like, I'm not going to miss him, but...it's just going to be weird.

0:23:140:23:18

Oi, Nathan!

0:23:190:23:21

Get over here! We're all here for you, you dickhead.

0:23:210:23:24

-Oh, it'd be nice to get a photo of the boys.

-Yes, like a group shot.

0:23:240:23:28

-Yeah.

-Yes, that's a good idea.

0:23:280:23:31

Oh, it's lovely out here.

0:23:310:23:34

Penny would have loved it.

0:23:340:23:36

-Is that your mate from jail?

-Mm. Yeah, she loved the country.

0:23:360:23:39

Well, perhaps you should ask her to come out and visit.

0:23:390:23:42

That'd be lovely, Kerry, thanks for that.

0:23:420:23:44

'It would have been good if the legends did come, but...

0:23:440:23:48

'It's still good, like,

0:23:480:23:49

'having my mates and friends and family and shit around.

0:23:490:23:52

-Boys, are you going to light that fire or what?

-Yeah. You got the firelighters?

0:23:520:23:57

-I don't know where they are, man.

-They're in the back of Steve's car.

0:23:570:24:00

Oi, Nathan!

0:24:000:24:02

Nath! Go and get the firelighters out of the back of Steve's ute.

0:24:020:24:05

'But having those blokes here - Blake, Tim, S.mouse -

0:24:050:24:10

'that would have been legendary. It would have been an awesome send-off for Nathan.

0:24:100:24:14

'Yeah, Nath would have remembered that forever.'

0:24:140:24:17

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0:27:510:27:53

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0:27:530:27:56

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