Episode 11 Angry Boys

This programme contains very strong language and adult humour.

We've got Nathe's farewell party this weekend. Is that straight?

The legends will be here in a week.

The stereo in the lounge room, get that and rig it up with some mics and shit.

This here's the main chill-out area. We've got all the chairs and shit.

This is where S.mouse is going to be performing.

He can do all this shit up here. Yeah, yeah. It'll be awesome.

Look how good it looks from here.

We've got the skatey setup for Tim Okazaki.

He's so good.

He could flip out there, grind along that fence, or some shit.

This is the surf stadium that me and the boys have set up.

This is where Blake Oakfield is going to be doing his surf demo.

Me and Nathan worked out this method where you can make waves.

Oi, Nathan! Make waves!

See? A bit of a swell there.

Nathe, are you getting excited about the party?

Your farewell party? Yeah?

He's not understanding me so much these days.

We reckon his hearing's really fucked. About 100% deaf.

That's why he's got to go to deaf school.

-SHOUTS:

-Nathan!

Is your hearing fully fucked?

There you go.

You don't get much out of him these days. Poor kid.

Yo! This is yo' boy, S.mouse.

Tonight is my big night. It's my album night, my showcase.

We got my new CD cover here. Yeah, this is The Real Me.

This is my shit, my album, my music.

Yeah, we got the music industry business suits coming in.

We got the media. We got the DJs.

We got anyone who's gonna make this ship blow up huge.

Cos the king of motherfucking hip-hop is back.

Yeah. I'm back tonight, yeah. I'm a little nervous but I'm excited.

How's that look? That look good?

I got my trademark dance move that I'm gonna be premiering.

I'm gonna show you that move so you know when I do that. It's this.

Starts at the front and you go...

That's that shit there.

That is gonna be bigger than Michael Jackson doing the moonwalk.

HIP-HOP BACKING TRACK

This is the resurrection.

Be uprising for the return of S.mouse exclamation mark!

Yeah!

Yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. You all look amazing from up here.

Yeah, yeah. You wanna all see the real me?

You wanna meet the real me? Play that shit, please.

Yeah.

ELECTRONIC SOUNDTRACK

-RAPS:

-You thought you knew me You didn't know me

You thought I was for your kids Well, fuck your kids...

'Tonight, I'm gonna be launching some of my new iconic fashion styles.'

I got a lot of changes throughout the show. You gotta mix it up.

Yeah, yeah, dick on my shoulder Get your dick on my shoulder

She said go to bed And get your dick on my shoulder

Tim, come and talk to me.

'It's been a terrible week since Tim started seeing his girlfriend.

'He barely talk to me.

'He spend all his time with her,'

leaving a shit-hot mess for me to clean up.

If you go to her house again, I'll throw your laptop off the roof.

'The news that Tim is not gay is all over the media.

'It's gone worldwide.'

My hair is falling out from the stress.

That's never happened to me before. That's how fucking stressed I am.

-Jen...

-I do not want to speak to them. Deal with it yourself.

'The six-million-dollar Oshikara campaign, cancelled.'

Shut the fuck up.

'No-one wants to be associated with Tim because he is a liar.'

-Don't look at me.

-But...

Shut up.

'Gay Style merchandise is in crisis.

'We're gonna lose a lot of money over this.

'All because of Tim and this girl.'

-CAR HORN HONKS

-Hey, stupid slag!

Tim, don't touch her.

Come here.

SPITS

That's for you, slag!

-Slag!

-SPITS

-That's for you.

-SPITS

What the hell, Mom? Go home! You're insane!

..You held my balls like you was holding a dove

Cos you was in love You got black balls

I got big black, big black balls

You know it's true, motherfuckers. Yeah.

You know what? I'm sensing the energy levels are a little bit low in the room, yeah?

I'm gonna get everyone on this side to say, "Yeah." Say, "Yeah!"

Yeah. I can't hear you.

-MAN: Slap your elbows, asshole!

-Say what?

-Slap your elbows, asshole!

-I'm sensing some hate in the room.

-Play that new song there. Play it.

-TRACK STARTS

Who wants a three-legged dog? Yeah, yeah, d'you want it?

Yeah. Three-legged dog I want a three-legged dog

I want a three-legged dog I really, really, really, really...

'When you perform, you've gotta give it everything.'

That shit was off the hook, yeah. Woo!

'You can't hold back, you know.'

You gotta shine. You gotta sell yo' shit, you know what I'm saying?

Some of them niggas was rocking out tonight, no shit!

Genius is a little scary at first, you know what I'm saying?

Frightens people at first, right?

I guess, huh.

I don't know about the ski boot though, man.

Yeah, yeah.

Woo! I am pooped! Yeah.

It's the first show.

You can put in 150% effort.

You can love your job, go above and beyond,

but there comes a time when your best efforts are not good enough.

You just gotta pull up your socks, wipe your tears and move on,

let someone else have a go.

Nothing lasts for ever.

Well, I guess this should come as no surprise. I have to let you go.

I thought that's where we were headed.

-I had to put the welfare of the boys first. You understand.

-I understand.

-I wanted you to know that I knew about the Alzheimer's.

-Right.

It wasn't just that Penny told me. I could see the signs.

Penny shouldn't have told you that. She shouldn't have told you.

Come on. She loves you. It's just not fair this has happened.

Oh, it IS fair.

Gotta let some young blood in.

I guess that's true.

So I'll be asked to move out of the house, then?

I'm afraid so.

I thought that might be the case.

Ah, well.

-Don't cry. It'll be OK.

-SHE SOBS

'So I'm going. 25 years, not a bad innings.

'Not bad at all for an old bitch like me.'

-It's not fair.

-It is.

We all have to move on.

Nathan, this means "thank you". Can you do that?

< Well done!

Do your ones.

He's doing "lesbian".

Mum, I'm a lesbian.

He's saying "dick". Look. Be sensible, guys.

There's a deaf man in the house!

< Daniel, don't tease him. He looks lovely in his uniform.

-We can do "lesbian".

-Is this sign language?

-And "dick".

-What's "dick"? Is that "dick"?

-Don't be silly, guys.

-Can you do, um..."fuckface"?

It's not even a real word. I can do "dickhead".

-"Dick", "head"!

-That's awesome!

I've got one. "How are you?"

Good one, Steve(!)

Went into town. Got some presents for the legends at the party.

Five buck limit, so we got this for S.mouse.

Ruler. Pen.

That's for Blake Oakfield, chick surfing movie.

And Tim Okazaki.

Two-minute noodles, oriental style and some chopsticks.

He might not want the food we eat.

Daniel, do you seriously think they're gonna come to this party?

-Gran said they are.

-They're definitely coming.

We got two RSVPs.

-S.mouse, we sent him a message about the squashed abbo kid...

-What?

Don't worry. Just a message.

Don't get your hopes up. It'll be a great party with just us.

Why would Gran say they're coming if they're not coming?

-Gran says some pretty strange things sometimes.

-Mate, they're not coming.

If three Hollywood celebrities come this Saturday night, I will buy you a car, Daniel.

You'll be buying me a car cos they will be coming.

Get your chequebook out, Stevie.

Believe what you believe, Steve.

-I believe they're coming. You don't.

-Dream away, mate.

-Dream away.

-I'm not dreaming. I know the reality.

Gran said they're coming so they're coming.

That's the end of the story. Nathe, get out of your uniform.

-STEVE CHUCKLES

-Help us set up for the party.

I don't know, man.

Maybe my new shit is not that good and I just don't know it.

Look, as your best friend, my nigga, I'm telling you right now.

-Your shit is good.

-Maybe you kiss my ass too much, nigga.

Maybe The Real Me isn't the real, REAL me, you know what I'm saying?

I'm not writing from the heart. I'm writing from the head.

-I'm thinking too much about shit.

-Change it up, then, dog.

I don't know how to do that so easy.

-Junior.

-I feel like I gotta get in touch with my emotions.

Your momma wants to know when you're going back to your own house.

Chill, motherfucker. I'm having a crisis.

-I'm your son. I can stay as long as I like.

-OK.

I'll pass that on to your momma.

Where's that message with the little aboriginal kid

that got squashed by the truck?

That's the last time I really felt moved by some shit.

-There's that kid that died.

-Motherfucker.

That's a waste, man. That kid getting squashed is a fucking waste.

That's my... That's how I feel, you know what I'm saying?

I feel squashed. I feel squashed by the music industry, by the haters.

This is shit that's making me feel stuff.

I could write that shit into a song. See where I'm goin' with that?

-Hell, yeah, dog.

-Junior.

Your momma said to take your ass home by the end of the week.

Shut the fuck up, please.

Boy, we got a sex life that you're ruining by being here.

Can you shut up, please? Motherfuck!

-Look, you been here for three months, boy.

-Yeah, I know.

-Your momma's getting horny. She won't fuck with you in the house.

-Shut up, please.

Where's my dyslexia glasses? Gonna get this shit down!

Tim, this might say where she is. She left this note in the office.

"Fuck you, Tim. Fuck you, all. I'm off to kill myself and the dog.

"Unless you dump your girlfriend and tell the world you are gay,

"the dog and me are dead. Mum."

-Where do you think she went?

-I have a few ideas.

I always run away when I get upset about something.

This is not the first time I done it.

I find it's quite a good method to get your point across.

Everyone starts to freak out when they don't know where you are.

I just sent my text message to Tim.

"Two hours till the dog gets it."

So we'll see what happens.

Thank you. Sit still, please.

Do you see her?

Come on, Mom. Let's go home.

-How did you find me?

-It is where you came last time you ran away.

I'm not coming home.

-Don't be stupid.

-You're the stupid one.

-Come on. Let's go home, Mom.

-No.

-I have something to tell you.

The only thing I want you to tell me is that you're gay

and you're not straight.

Until you say that I'm not coming home.

-Come on, Mom.

-No.

-I have to tell you something.

-Get off me.

-Come on, Jen.

-Let's go home.

-That's good.

-You'd better have something good to tell me.

-It will be.

Take the dog. It's yours, anyway.

Now, I've got Penny keeping an eye on you,

to make sure you're behaving yourself, so I'll get a full report.

Is that for me, is it?

Thank you, Taylor. What have we got here?

Oh! That's lovely, isn't it?

A key ring, is it? Did you make that in craft?

Thank you, sweetheart. Very thoughtful.

Now,

I want you to try harder with your talking.

I know you've got it in you.

I've got a grandson your age

who wishes he could talk but he can't cos he's deaf.

I'm no psychiatrist, but I want you to promise me

that you'll give talking a go cos I think it'll help.

All right?

-Yes?

-OK.

-Can't hear you.

-OK.

Is that all I get, is it?

Where's my, "See you later, Gran. Thanks for everything"?

How about, "Piss off, bitch"?

-Piss off, bitch!

-Cheeky little bastard.

I'm gonna miss you, you little dickhead.

All right. I'll take that.

And I'll see you later.

All right?

What the fuck is he doing?

He's had an epiphany.

-A what?

-He's writing about real emotion.

Some nigga got squashed in Australia.

Whatever.

Nigga.

-What rhymes with "nigga"?

-Bigger.

Get out the way. I wanna try some shit here. It's the chorus.

It's the hook. We go...

-SINGS:

-# Squashed nigga Squashed nigga #

Then we go... # I feel like a squashed nigga. #

-You like that shit?

-You know that ain't rapping, right?

-Don't tell me you gonna sing this shit?

-I'm gonna sing this shit.

-Don't you laugh, motherfucker.

-I ain't laughing.

I'm saying I'm gonna sing this shit.

-You said singing was for homosexuals.

-Shut the fuck up.

I gotta work out the verses here.

Take the dog.

Right... Get off me! Get it off me! Take!

Oh, birth control!

What? Go.

-Talk.

-I want to get back to skateboarding.

I want to re-establish myself back in America.

-And I want to do it on my own.

-Fat chance. You're a child. Don't be stupid.

I got some legal advice for you.

They said that I can cut you off whenever I want.

All that money is mine cos I'm the reason you've made so much. My image.

My skating.

So, yeah. I'm gonna start doing this on my own from now on.

SOBS

I just tried to be a good mother.

-SOBBING:

-I'm so sorry, Tim.

I want to do the best for you. I love you, Tim.

I'm a Japanese lady, and sometimes I have to stand up for myself.

I just try to be strong for you.

Please don't dump me, Tim.

Without you, I have nothing.

Mom, I appreciate everything you did for me.

I'm not a child any more. You can still be my mom.

I just want to look after the business by myself.

No fucking way.

No fucking way. It's in the contract. I'm your manager.

You know that. You haven't got a leg to stand on.

-Jen...

-The company is mine. Gay Style is in my name, not yours.

What you gonna do about that?

Jen, nobody is buying Gay Style product any more.

-And Tim is not gay.

-Who cares what you think, dipshit?

Start listening to Bruce cos he's gonna be my new manager.

As of tomorrow, I'm...firing you.

Well, fuck you hard, then, Tim.

Fuck you hard! You know what, Tim?

I'm going to start an internet rumour that you fucked me! That's how non-gay you are.

-You had sex with your mother up the ass!

-Calm down.

Shut up, faggot! Sit down!

I didn't drive you to the skate park every fucking morning of my life

to be dumped by you.

You're going to hear from my lawyers if you do this shit. You're gonna pay for that.

-I'm not changing my mind.

-You're gonna burn, fuckface!

-Jen.

-You're going down.

-Mom!

-Jen, this is your son.

Turn that shit off!

I did not ask to be in a documentary anyway. This not going on TV.

-Hey, Gran. You off?

-Yes, I'm off.

-Catch up later.

-See ya, mate.

It's nice, isn't it? I'm glad there's been no big fuss.

I wouldn't have wanted a big hoo-ha.

Surprise!

Oh, wow-wee!

Did you do this?

-ALL CHANT: Gran! Gran! Gran!

-Oh, my God!

I can't believe it.

All right, boys. Settle down.

-We got you this.

-Oh, my God!

What a lovely guinea pig. Wow!

Did you organise this? I love it!

-I love it!

-BOY SHOUTS: Speech!

I'll get you to take that for me. This is really quite embarrassing.

I didn't realise you were going to so much trouble.

It's certainly been a fantastic place to work for 25 years.

I've very much enjoyed it.

Putting up with you rat-bags has been interesting.

I hope you've learnt a thing or two.

You've certainly taught me a thing or two - a few rude words.

-LAUGHTER

-I, er...

I guess my main message is to you young fellas.

I know a lot of you young blokes, you've written yourselves off.

You've lost hope.

People in your lives have told you you're worthless.

You're certainly not worthless.

And, er...I know all of you guys have it in you

to grow up to be wonderful young men.

When you're out there on the outside, don't be fuckwits.

Don't hurt others or you'll end up in the big house.

-And that'll be such a waste, OK?

-BOY: Love you, Gran.

-Thanks, Gran.

-Love you, Gran.

When you blokes see me out in the big wide world, I hope you say g'day or I'll be bloody pissed off!

Thanks to everyone who's organised this. I'll remember it for ever.

-Hip, hip.

-Hooray!

-Hip, hip.

-Hooray!

-Hip, hip.

-Hooray!

ALL CHANT: Gran! Gran! Gran!

-TUNEFUL:

-# Little nigga, it's true Oh

# You got squashed in your room... #

'Singing has always been there.'

It's always been in my stomach, you know?

# ..When the truck smashed through his door, brother... #

'This song is a departure for me, musically,

'but, you know, I feel like'

this is the real, real, REAL me.

'I'm a motherfucking singer. What you gonna do about that?'

# ..I feel crushed all the time Jesus, give me a sign... #

-Thought you said singing was for homosexuals.

-I say a lot of shit, motherfucker.

-That's damn good, man. It ain't too bad.

-I wrote a good song!

-I wrote a good song.

-You wrote a motherfucking good song!

Give me a fucking hug! I wrote a good song! Yeah!

I wrote a fucking good song!

-Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that enough length?

-Daniel?

Just been on the phone with Gran.

She wants you to give her a call on skype.

-Why?

-She's gonna come and stay with us for a while. She's a bit unwell.

-Is she gonna be here for the party?

-Yeah.

-Boys! My gran's gonna be here for the party!

'You staying for a while?'

Yeah. I'm gonna move down. Mum tell you I've left the prison?

No. Why did you leave?

Oh, I got a bit sick.

What kind of sick?

-I got Alzheimer's. Do you know what that is?

-Yeah.

It's like when you forget shit.

-Yes.

-That's pretty shit.

So is that the bad news?

Well, yeah.

Oh. Sorry to hear it.

Um, you seem normal. Do you remember MY name?

Yes, Daniel. I do.

Now, listen, mate.

You know how you wanted me to invite those celebrity guests to Nathan's party?

Yeah. The legends.

And I know it meant a lot to you.

But, to be honest, I don't think I...

I may have forgotten to invite them.

I... Penny's checked my e-mails and...

it doesn't look like I did invite them.

I forgot.

-But you told me they were coming.

-Did I say that, did I?

I'm sorry, mate.

-So they're not coming?

-No.

I don't think they are, darling.

It's... I just...

have been saying things lately

that don't make a lot of sense.

It's the disease. It's the Alzheimer's.

I'm so sorry, sweetheart.

It's cool.

Are you OK about it?

Oh, yeah. I'll be all right.

I'm OK, mate.

Cool.

I had my artificial balls operation. Looks pretty realistic.

I've restarted Fat Boy Surf School.

I've got a ratio of two mad boys to each fat boy.

Tim has bought us a family home. Let me tell you, this house is shit.

The floor is not for sitting on. Tim fucked me up big time.

The cock cushions. Cock box here.

Being a household mum is shit.

He's out in the big old world again.

Let's see if they recognise me.

Being adored by fans, I don't miss that.

I respect you when you back your car out of my driveway.

Nathan, get out here!

I think the family thought I was going to be much more of an invalid.

We're going into town for final farewells.

-See ya, Nathan.

-What the fuck did you do that for?

Going to do all the stuff Nathe loves.

Did you see him surfing?

Show the camera.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd