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BIRDS CAW | 0:00:28 | 0:00:32 | |
This is the Sisters' cemetery. | 0:00:43 | 0:00:46 | |
This is the graveyard of the monastery. | 0:00:46 | 0:00:48 | |
And when I die, | 0:00:51 | 0:00:53 | |
which I don't think will be all that long, | 0:00:53 | 0:00:56 | |
or at least that's what I hope, | 0:00:56 | 0:00:59 | |
this is where I will lie. | 0:00:59 | 0:01:02 | |
I don't think I'll be in one of those lines, though. | 0:01:04 | 0:01:07 | |
That's community and I'm not a member of the community. | 0:01:07 | 0:01:12 | |
But I'll be with them. | 0:01:12 | 0:01:13 | |
I want to be tucked away somewhere, | 0:01:13 | 0:01:16 | |
perhaps behind the cross or under the bush or behind the tree. | 0:01:16 | 0:01:19 | |
In the chapel, the Sisters live in the main body of the church | 0:01:22 | 0:01:26 | |
and I'm tucked away in the belfry. | 0:01:26 | 0:01:28 | |
Well, that's where I'm going to be for eternity, I hope, | 0:01:30 | 0:01:34 | |
tucked away in the belfry of the graveyard. | 0:01:34 | 0:01:37 | |
Thanking God for allowing me a life of such... | 0:01:39 | 0:01:44 | |
..unimaginable happiness. | 0:01:46 | 0:01:48 | |
Lucky me. | 0:01:50 | 0:01:51 | |
That's it. | 0:01:53 | 0:01:55 | |
Sister Wendy Beckett, now 82, | 0:02:17 | 0:02:20 | |
first performed in front of a camera over 20 years ago | 0:02:20 | 0:02:23 | |
when I met her as a young BBC television researcher. | 0:02:23 | 0:02:26 | |
All teeth and glasses, she instantly became the nation's favourite nun, | 0:02:33 | 0:02:38 | |
television's arts nun. | 0:02:38 | 0:02:40 | |
And here we have the great mythological scene | 0:02:44 | 0:02:46 | |
but I really can't afford to spend time looking at it | 0:02:46 | 0:02:49 | |
because I want to get onto this huge cloth, this wonder of the museum. | 0:02:49 | 0:02:56 | |
Viewers were expected to be entertained by Sister Wendy. | 0:02:58 | 0:03:01 | |
They were. | 0:03:03 | 0:03:04 | |
Later, she mused to me that after a single television series, | 0:03:06 | 0:03:10 | |
she'd become famous for talking about art | 0:03:10 | 0:03:13 | |
but little was known about her life as a nun. | 0:03:13 | 0:03:16 | |
For years, I wanted to make a film about the real Wendy. | 0:03:18 | 0:03:22 | |
She finally agreed, but on her own terms. | 0:03:22 | 0:03:25 | |
She would choose paintings of the gospel stories, the life of Jesus, | 0:03:26 | 0:03:31 | |
and use them to reveal more about the forces that drive her life. | 0:03:31 | 0:03:35 | |
I've tried to choose the events in the Gospels | 0:03:38 | 0:03:43 | |
that were most important in the life of Jesus. | 0:03:43 | 0:03:47 | |
These, to me, are the ones I think of most reverently | 0:03:53 | 0:03:59 | |
and with such longing to understand | 0:03:59 | 0:04:02 | |
what God was showing us | 0:04:02 | 0:04:04 | |
when he experienced this or did that. | 0:04:04 | 0:04:08 | |
They're great paintings because they're not just illustrative. | 0:04:17 | 0:04:21 | |
Here is a great genius looking at something that Jesus did... | 0:04:27 | 0:04:33 | |
..or experienced... | 0:04:34 | 0:04:36 | |
..or suffered... | 0:04:40 | 0:04:41 | |
..and trying to make it visible. | 0:04:43 | 0:04:47 | |
There's great grace there for those who look. | 0:04:47 | 0:04:50 | |
Wendy lives in silence and solitude, | 0:05:18 | 0:05:21 | |
a hermit who prays out of sight in the middle of a spinney. | 0:05:21 | 0:05:25 | |
No music, TV, not even a telephone. | 0:05:27 | 0:05:31 | |
She is alone with her maker. | 0:05:32 | 0:05:35 | |
Her home is a caravan under the protection of the Carmelites, | 0:05:39 | 0:05:43 | |
an enclosed order of contemplative nuns based in Quidenham, Norfolk. | 0:05:43 | 0:05:47 | |
They offered me unprecedented access to film Sister Wendy. | 0:05:52 | 0:05:56 | |
40 years ago, they offered her sanctuary here | 0:06:00 | 0:06:04 | |
after a physical and psychological crisis. | 0:06:04 | 0:06:07 | |
In fact I would say, if you expressed it in the old jargon, | 0:06:09 | 0:06:12 | |
she could read souls. | 0:06:12 | 0:06:14 | |
But all this must have been a terrific strain on her psyche. | 0:06:14 | 0:06:18 | |
That's why she didn't want to be in the chapel outside. | 0:06:18 | 0:06:22 | |
She came in, asked to be away, | 0:06:22 | 0:06:24 | |
because everything pressed on her, pressed on her, pressed on her, | 0:06:24 | 0:06:28 | |
so I think just to cope with ordinary life, for her, | 0:06:28 | 0:06:32 | |
that's why she had to be on her own. | 0:06:32 | 0:06:35 | |
God uses everything in a person | 0:06:36 | 0:06:39 | |
and if they're a bit unbalanced, he can use that. | 0:06:39 | 0:06:43 | |
You know what I mean? And they can be great gifts. | 0:06:43 | 0:06:46 | |
Often great artists and that are not the most balanced people. | 0:06:46 | 0:06:49 | |
# This one thing I know | 0:06:49 | 0:06:54 | |
# For he loves me so | 0:06:54 | 0:06:58 | |
# Jesus' blood never failed me yet... # | 0:06:58 | 0:07:03 | |
'I have seven hours' sleep, so I'm going to bed not long after five | 0:07:03 | 0:07:08 | |
'and then I get up shortly after midnight | 0:07:08 | 0:07:11 | |
'but that's simply because I think that's a good time to pray, | 0:07:11 | 0:07:17 | |
'when all the world is quiet, and many people are suffering at night | 0:07:17 | 0:07:21 | |
'when they drop the mask and just look at themselves.' | 0:07:21 | 0:07:26 | |
# Jesus' blood never failed me yet... # | 0:07:26 | 0:07:30 | |
In the 67 years since she became a nun, | 0:07:30 | 0:07:33 | |
Sister Wendy has never once missed Mass. | 0:07:33 | 0:07:35 | |
For her, it's an act of total commitment, | 0:07:37 | 0:07:41 | |
not an act of docile obedience or conformity. | 0:07:41 | 0:07:44 | |
'We all seem to have a longing to be told what to do | 0:07:50 | 0:07:53 | |
'and I think in Jesus you can see | 0:07:53 | 0:07:55 | |
'that that isn't really how God wants us to act. | 0:07:55 | 0:07:59 | |
'We must do what we think is right. | 0:07:59 | 0:08:02 | |
'That's the whole point of conscience.' | 0:08:02 | 0:08:04 | |
BELL RINGS | 0:08:08 | 0:08:11 | |
You see it in every walk of life, | 0:08:13 | 0:08:15 | |
the desire to have a strong, authoritarian voice | 0:08:15 | 0:08:19 | |
telling you what to do, so you don't have to bother. | 0:08:19 | 0:08:22 | |
Which means, of course, you don't have to bother about God either | 0:08:22 | 0:08:26 | |
because God asks you to look at him and decide, | 0:08:26 | 0:08:28 | |
not look at what somebody else is telling you. | 0:08:28 | 0:08:31 | |
CHOIR SINGS | 0:08:38 | 0:08:43 | |
Sister Wendy always sits in the belfry, alone, | 0:08:47 | 0:08:51 | |
tucked away out of sight, | 0:08:51 | 0:08:55 | |
still a hermit, even during a communal service. | 0:08:55 | 0:09:00 | |
The Lord be with you. | 0:09:00 | 0:09:02 | |
A reading from the Holy Gospel According to Luke. | 0:09:02 | 0:09:06 | |
NUNS: Glory to thee, O Lord. | 0:09:06 | 0:09:08 | |
The tax collectors and the sinners | 0:09:10 | 0:09:13 | |
were all seeking the company of Jesus to hear what he had to say | 0:09:13 | 0:09:18 | |
and the Pharisees and scribes complained. | 0:09:18 | 0:09:21 | |
"This man," they said, "welcomes sinners and eats with them." | 0:09:21 | 0:09:25 | |
So he spoke this parable to them. | 0:09:25 | 0:09:28 | |
"What man among you with 100 sheep, | 0:09:30 | 0:09:33 | |
"losing one, would not leave the 99 in the wilderness | 0:09:33 | 0:09:37 | |
"and go after the missing one until he found it? | 0:09:37 | 0:09:40 | |
"And when he found it, would he not joyfully take it on his shoulders | 0:09:41 | 0:09:46 | |
"and then, when he got home, | 0:09:46 | 0:09:48 | |
"call together his friends and his neighbours? | 0:09:48 | 0:09:52 | |
"'Rejoice with me', he would say. | 0:09:52 | 0:09:54 | |
"'I have found the sheep that was lost.'" | 0:09:54 | 0:09:57 | |
'Well, I've noticed it, of course, in museums.' | 0:09:57 | 0:10:01 | |
People looking at the kind of stories, Christian stories, | 0:10:01 | 0:10:05 | |
that they would have been told in Sunday school in the past. | 0:10:05 | 0:10:09 | |
Now they just don't know. | 0:10:09 | 0:10:11 | |
"Why is that man standing in the river | 0:10:11 | 0:10:14 | |
"with another man pouring water over his head? What's happening?" | 0:10:14 | 0:10:17 | |
In the past, everybody, more or less, knew the stories | 0:10:17 | 0:10:22 | |
but they evidently didn't understand the meaning of the stories. | 0:10:22 | 0:10:25 | |
They weren't living by the stories | 0:10:25 | 0:10:28 | |
so I don't know whether | 0:10:28 | 0:10:30 | |
the spiritual level of the country has changed at all. | 0:10:30 | 0:10:34 | |
What has changed is the cultural level. | 0:10:34 | 0:10:37 | |
Most people did know the outlines of the faith of our fathers | 0:10:38 | 0:10:42 | |
and this country has been built on the Christian faith. | 0:10:42 | 0:10:46 | |
It's our heritage, it belongs to everybody, | 0:10:46 | 0:10:49 | |
whether they believe it or not. They have a right to know what happened. | 0:10:49 | 0:10:54 | |
So that does sadden me, yes. | 0:10:57 | 0:11:00 | |
I think what we have to do is... | 0:11:06 | 0:11:08 | |
Wendy's performances come from the heart. | 0:11:08 | 0:11:11 | |
She falls into a state of deep concentration | 0:11:11 | 0:11:15 | |
before standing up to perform. | 0:11:15 | 0:11:17 | |
There are no notes, no rehearsal | 0:11:17 | 0:11:20 | |
but it comes out word perfect. | 0:11:20 | 0:11:23 | |
Scripture tells us that the Angel Gabriel was sent by God | 0:11:25 | 0:11:31 | |
to a virgin in the town of Nazareth | 0:11:31 | 0:11:34 | |
and the virgin's name was Mary | 0:11:34 | 0:11:36 | |
and it sounds so simple and ordinary | 0:11:36 | 0:11:40 | |
but this was the greatest event that ever happened. | 0:11:40 | 0:11:45 | |
Two great things happened to us. | 0:11:45 | 0:11:47 | |
First, the world was created. | 0:11:47 | 0:11:50 | |
And then, after millennia | 0:11:52 | 0:11:54 | |
of watching the terrible mess we were making of ourselves, | 0:11:54 | 0:11:59 | |
God became man. | 0:11:59 | 0:12:02 | |
And it happened like this. | 0:12:02 | 0:12:05 | |
Heaven and Earth meet. | 0:12:05 | 0:12:09 | |
There is the Angel Gabriel, the heavenly sphere, | 0:12:09 | 0:12:12 | |
and I think Veneziano suggests that | 0:12:12 | 0:12:15 | |
in the way the angel's come ahead of the pillars. | 0:12:15 | 0:12:19 | |
He's out of his sphere, he's in our sphere. | 0:12:19 | 0:12:21 | |
Mary is in our human sphere. | 0:12:22 | 0:12:25 | |
She's been sitting. | 0:12:25 | 0:12:27 | |
She rises up, astonished, | 0:12:27 | 0:12:30 | |
and in honour of the angel, | 0:12:30 | 0:12:32 | |
but the angel sinks to the ground | 0:12:32 | 0:12:37 | |
in honour of Mary | 0:12:37 | 0:12:39 | |
because of the message. | 0:12:39 | 0:12:42 | |
He has to ask her, will she become the mother of God? | 0:12:42 | 0:12:49 | |
And Mary says, "I'm the handmaid of the Lord. I'm his servant. | 0:12:49 | 0:12:54 | |
"Whatever he wants, I'll do." | 0:12:54 | 0:12:56 | |
Mary's made it possible for us all, | 0:12:58 | 0:13:01 | |
when God asks something almost impossible, | 0:13:01 | 0:13:04 | |
to say, "Yes, if God wants it, he'll make it happen." | 0:13:04 | 0:13:08 | |
When I was either three or four, | 0:13:21 | 0:13:25 | |
it was a Sunday and we'd come back from Mass | 0:13:25 | 0:13:29 | |
and I can remember it so vividly. | 0:13:29 | 0:13:31 | |
There was a smell of sausages cooking, | 0:13:31 | 0:13:34 | |
and for some reason, I was sitting under a table | 0:13:34 | 0:13:38 | |
and suddenly, I became overwhelmed | 0:13:38 | 0:13:43 | |
by the reality of God. | 0:13:43 | 0:13:45 | |
The... | 0:13:48 | 0:13:49 | |
The greatness and the power and the love | 0:13:51 | 0:13:54 | |
and my own infinite smallness. | 0:13:54 | 0:13:57 | |
And I knew that I was held in that greatness and protected... | 0:13:59 | 0:14:04 | |
And I would never, ever have to feel anxious. | 0:14:06 | 0:14:10 | |
I think God gave me that insight | 0:14:11 | 0:14:16 | |
because I was such a frail, unstable sort of person | 0:14:16 | 0:14:20 | |
and I think that understanding of God's closeness and his... | 0:14:20 | 0:14:26 | |
..his love | 0:14:28 | 0:14:30 | |
unconsciously influenced everything I did thereafter. | 0:14:30 | 0:14:34 | |
Did you have any other experiences after that of a similar kind? | 0:14:36 | 0:14:40 | |
No, that one was enough for a lifetime. | 0:14:40 | 0:14:43 | |
But there must be times when you feel something extraordinary, or...? | 0:14:43 | 0:14:49 | |
Ah, well, we're moving into areas | 0:14:51 | 0:14:54 | |
-that I don't think should be spoken of. -OK, that's absolutely right. | 0:14:54 | 0:14:59 | |
When I started this film, | 0:15:05 | 0:15:08 | |
I thought it was going to be purely about Jesus | 0:15:08 | 0:15:11 | |
but somehow, I seem to be taking more and more space in the film. | 0:15:11 | 0:15:18 | |
And so I can't see a structure. | 0:15:20 | 0:15:25 | |
You might say it's none of my business to see a structure, | 0:15:25 | 0:15:29 | |
those making the film see the structure. | 0:15:29 | 0:15:31 | |
But once we get away from talking about Jesus... | 0:15:33 | 0:15:37 | |
..I'm in darkness | 0:15:40 | 0:15:42 | |
but trying to do what's asked of me. | 0:15:42 | 0:15:44 | |
When we think of the Nativity, | 0:15:57 | 0:16:00 | |
it's so easy to think of Christmas plays and Christmas cards | 0:16:00 | 0:16:04 | |
and stables and animals and the three kings | 0:16:04 | 0:16:08 | |
and to miss the gravity, the seriousness of what was happening. | 0:16:08 | 0:16:13 | |
Now, one of the reasons why I love this icon is because it's so grave. | 0:16:14 | 0:16:21 | |
It's so weighty with the wonder of God becoming man. | 0:16:21 | 0:16:26 | |
It's one of the very earliest images | 0:16:26 | 0:16:29 | |
in icon form of mother and child | 0:16:29 | 0:16:33 | |
and to me, it's a perfect example | 0:16:33 | 0:16:37 | |
of why we so cherish the birth of Christ. | 0:16:37 | 0:16:40 | |
Notice how Mary withdraws herself. | 0:16:40 | 0:16:45 | |
She's looking away from us, she doesn't want us even to notice her. | 0:16:45 | 0:16:49 | |
She's there to bring forward the wonder of her child. | 0:16:49 | 0:16:54 | |
It's the expression that makes this little Jesus so wonderful. | 0:16:54 | 0:16:58 | |
In fact, I don't know of any portrait of Jesus | 0:16:58 | 0:17:01 | |
that moved me as much as this one. | 0:17:01 | 0:17:03 | |
He's about something great | 0:17:05 | 0:17:08 | |
and he's drawing us into it. | 0:17:08 | 0:17:11 | |
I think those who met Jesus | 0:17:12 | 0:17:14 | |
must have been so conscious of his enormous spiritual energy, | 0:17:14 | 0:17:18 | |
that power of love and searching | 0:17:18 | 0:17:21 | |
that drew him forward and drew all men to him. | 0:17:21 | 0:17:24 | |
Now, this is still a very small child... | 0:17:26 | 0:17:29 | |
..almost awed by being in the world, | 0:17:30 | 0:17:34 | |
not in control, but searching, loving, | 0:17:34 | 0:17:39 | |
seeking us to come with him on the great quest for his father. | 0:17:39 | 0:17:44 | |
You were obviously extremely intellectually precocious | 0:17:55 | 0:17:58 | |
as a child, weren't you? | 0:17:58 | 0:18:00 | |
I just wonder whether that separated you from the other children. | 0:18:00 | 0:18:03 | |
Well, I never expected to be able to talk to anybody | 0:18:03 | 0:18:07 | |
but I took that for granted, that was how people were, | 0:18:07 | 0:18:11 | |
they never found anybody they could talk to. | 0:18:11 | 0:18:14 | |
So as long as I had somebody around | 0:18:15 | 0:18:18 | |
who saved me from the shame of being friendless, | 0:18:18 | 0:18:22 | |
I didn't really care very much. | 0:18:22 | 0:18:24 | |
I'm afraid people have not meant much to me in my life. | 0:18:24 | 0:18:27 | |
I think I've got a cold heart. | 0:18:27 | 0:18:29 | |
My mother never forgot how once | 0:18:29 | 0:18:34 | |
I invited a friend to come and play with me. | 0:18:34 | 0:18:37 | |
My mother heard me welcoming her, and I said, "Hello, Shirley, come in. | 0:18:39 | 0:18:43 | |
"There's your book and that's my book." | 0:18:43 | 0:18:47 | |
She said, "You don't do that when people come!" | 0:18:47 | 0:18:49 | |
"So what do you do?" "You talk to them." | 0:18:49 | 0:18:52 | |
Well, I'm no good if I've got to talk to them! | 0:18:52 | 0:18:55 | |
That was my idea of playing together, we each read our books in company. | 0:18:55 | 0:18:59 | |
-You had an older sister. Do you..? -No, no. I'm a firstborn. | 0:19:01 | 0:19:05 | |
-Sorry, Wendy. You had a sister... -Yes. | 0:19:05 | 0:19:08 | |
-Were you a good sister? -Oh... | 0:19:08 | 0:19:12 | |
My great sin has been my nastiness to my little sister. | 0:19:13 | 0:19:17 | |
Once she said to me, | 0:19:19 | 0:19:20 | |
"Wendy, I don't know why you keep bashing yourself up about it. | 0:19:20 | 0:19:24 | |
"I never expected you to be nice to me." Which makes it even worse! | 0:19:24 | 0:19:27 | |
No, I was cruel and harsh to her. | 0:19:27 | 0:19:30 | |
I never hit her or anything, but I took no notice of her. | 0:19:30 | 0:19:33 | |
I just wasn't interested. | 0:19:33 | 0:19:35 | |
My mother, she was the one who disciplined us, not my father. | 0:19:37 | 0:19:41 | |
And she's told my sister, well, no, she said to me, | 0:19:43 | 0:19:48 | |
"You were always a very difficult child." | 0:19:48 | 0:19:51 | |
So I asked my sister to find out how had I been difficult, | 0:19:52 | 0:19:55 | |
because I thought I'd been a fairly docile child. | 0:19:55 | 0:20:00 | |
"Oh, no", said our mother. | 0:20:00 | 0:20:03 | |
"She was full of self-will." | 0:20:03 | 0:20:05 | |
So my mother saw the faults in me. | 0:20:07 | 0:20:12 | |
I was 16, nearly 17, | 0:20:33 | 0:20:36 | |
and I felt nothing but the utmost joy | 0:20:36 | 0:20:40 | |
and I was astonished that my parents were sad | 0:20:40 | 0:20:43 | |
when I left them to become a nun. | 0:20:43 | 0:20:46 | |
It never occurred to me they'd mind. | 0:20:46 | 0:20:49 | |
I'd wanted to be a nun for so long. | 0:20:49 | 0:20:52 | |
I couldn't wait. I was blissful. | 0:20:52 | 0:20:55 | |
Nasty child, you see, no real human emotions. | 0:20:57 | 0:21:01 | |
Like a young girl eloping, I suppose, | 0:21:01 | 0:21:04 | |
so filled with the thought of what she was going towards, | 0:21:04 | 0:21:07 | |
she had no time to think of what she'd left behind | 0:21:07 | 0:21:10 | |
and I never, never for one moment ever pined. | 0:21:10 | 0:21:13 | |
Jesus had lived all his life, | 0:21:19 | 0:21:22 | |
about 30 years, we think, in the small village of Nazareth | 0:21:22 | 0:21:27 | |
and he must have felt more and more how different he was | 0:21:27 | 0:21:34 | |
because he just lived to do his Father's will | 0:21:34 | 0:21:39 | |
but he still wasn't sure | 0:21:39 | 0:21:42 | |
what he should be doing. | 0:21:42 | 0:21:44 | |
He was waiting with love and trust for the Father to make it clear. | 0:21:44 | 0:21:49 | |
When he heard that his cousin John was there in the desert, | 0:21:53 | 0:21:58 | |
calling people to change their lives, | 0:21:58 | 0:22:01 | |
a baptism of repentance, | 0:22:01 | 0:22:03 | |
it must have struck Jesus. | 0:22:03 | 0:22:05 | |
"Perhaps this is the step I need to take | 0:22:05 | 0:22:10 | |
"to change my life, and things will become clear." | 0:22:10 | 0:22:13 | |
And then a voice from heaven, his Father, says, | 0:22:15 | 0:22:21 | |
"You are my beloved son | 0:22:21 | 0:22:25 | |
"in whom I am well pleased." | 0:22:25 | 0:22:27 | |
And over his head appears the glimmering white of the dove | 0:22:30 | 0:22:34 | |
which signifies the Holy Spirit, | 0:22:34 | 0:22:38 | |
so this is Jesus ready to embark | 0:22:38 | 0:22:42 | |
upon what we call his ministry, his teaching life, | 0:22:42 | 0:22:47 | |
and you'll notice, nobody understands. | 0:22:47 | 0:22:49 | |
Even the angels are really rather disinterested. | 0:22:49 | 0:22:52 | |
Angels to one side, human beings to the other, | 0:22:54 | 0:22:57 | |
Jesus unites both worlds | 0:22:57 | 0:23:00 | |
and neither world understands him. | 0:23:00 | 0:23:02 | |
Sister Wendy was born in South Africa. | 0:23:18 | 0:23:21 | |
When she was 16, she joined the local convent of a teaching order | 0:23:21 | 0:23:26 | |
which sent its British nuns to be trained in Sussex. | 0:23:26 | 0:23:30 | |
After taking her vows, | 0:23:32 | 0:23:33 | |
she was sent to another convent, this time in Oxford, | 0:23:33 | 0:23:37 | |
to read English at the university. | 0:23:37 | 0:23:39 | |
But a strict Mother Superior | 0:23:43 | 0:23:45 | |
instructed her never to talk to the other students | 0:23:45 | 0:23:48 | |
or participate in any aspect of university life, | 0:23:48 | 0:23:52 | |
so she read all day in her room | 0:23:52 | 0:23:55 | |
and graduated with the highest marks ever | 0:23:55 | 0:24:00 | |
to the satisfaction of her university professor. | 0:24:00 | 0:24:03 | |
I remember Tolkien because he was the president of my examining board | 0:24:14 | 0:24:19 | |
and he was extraordinarily kind to me. | 0:24:19 | 0:24:22 | |
He actually turned the marks books round so that I could see my marks | 0:24:22 | 0:24:26 | |
and I still didn't take it in. | 0:24:26 | 0:24:28 | |
So what were the marks? | 0:24:28 | 0:24:30 | |
I got an Alpha for everything except in one paper. | 0:24:30 | 0:24:33 | |
Which made it a certain first. | 0:24:37 | 0:24:41 | |
When I read the life of Harold Wilson, | 0:24:41 | 0:24:46 | |
it said Harold Wilson got the best first ever at Oxford | 0:24:46 | 0:24:49 | |
and it gave his marks, and they were my marks! | 0:24:49 | 0:24:53 | |
So Harold Wilson and I can march proudly together. Oh, dear! | 0:24:53 | 0:24:57 | |
It took me down a peg or two | 0:24:57 | 0:24:59 | |
because one does not think of Mr Wilson as a great intellect. | 0:24:59 | 0:25:04 | |
But like me, he probably had the gift | 0:25:04 | 0:25:07 | |
of putting all his goods in the shop window. | 0:25:07 | 0:25:09 | |
One day, when Jesus was talking, | 0:25:21 | 0:25:24 | |
a lawyer called out to him, | 0:25:24 | 0:25:26 | |
"Master, what shall I do to obtain eternal life?" | 0:25:26 | 0:25:30 | |
Jesus said to him, "What does it say in the Scriptures?" | 0:25:30 | 0:25:35 | |
The man said, "Well, it says you shall love the Lord thy God | 0:25:35 | 0:25:40 | |
"with all thy heart and all thy soul and all thy mind and all thy strength | 0:25:40 | 0:25:45 | |
"and thy neighbour as thyself." | 0:25:45 | 0:25:48 | |
And Jesus said, "You've answered well. Do that and you will live." | 0:25:49 | 0:25:53 | |
Now, the lawyer wanted an argument. | 0:25:53 | 0:25:57 | |
He didn't want his words thrown back on him | 0:25:57 | 0:26:00 | |
so he said, "And who is my neighbour?" | 0:26:00 | 0:26:04 | |
And Jesus again didn't argue. He told him a story. | 0:26:04 | 0:26:08 | |
He said, "There was a man who went down from Jerusalem to Jericho." | 0:26:08 | 0:26:13 | |
They all knew that road, dangerous road. | 0:26:13 | 0:26:16 | |
And he fell among thieves | 0:26:16 | 0:26:18 | |
and they beat him and stripped him and robbed him | 0:26:18 | 0:26:21 | |
and left him half dead by the wayside. | 0:26:21 | 0:26:23 | |
Now, a priest came upon him | 0:26:25 | 0:26:27 | |
and quickly passed by to the other side | 0:26:27 | 0:26:30 | |
and then a Levite, a temple servant, | 0:26:30 | 0:26:33 | |
he too went by on the other side. | 0:26:33 | 0:26:35 | |
And then came a Samaritan | 0:26:36 | 0:26:39 | |
and this man leapt off his horse and bent down to this poor bloodied man | 0:26:39 | 0:26:45 | |
and he washed him and he bound up his wounds, put him on his horse, | 0:26:45 | 0:26:50 | |
took him to the inn, gave the innkeeper money to look after him, | 0:26:50 | 0:26:54 | |
said, "I'll come back with more money if need be." | 0:26:54 | 0:26:57 | |
"Now," said Jesus, "who acted as neighbour?" | 0:26:59 | 0:27:02 | |
And the lawyer said, "Well, I suppose him who showed pity." | 0:27:04 | 0:27:07 | |
"Yes," said Jesus. "Go thou and do likewise." | 0:27:07 | 0:27:11 | |
After I'd been teaching for, must have been over 20 years, | 0:27:26 | 0:27:32 | |
I had a series of very public and nasty epileptic fits | 0:27:32 | 0:27:38 | |
and I was genuinely ill | 0:27:38 | 0:27:41 | |
and the doctors spoke to my superiors about it and it was then they said, | 0:27:41 | 0:27:46 | |
"Look, you've asked for years to be allowed to become a contemplative. | 0:27:46 | 0:27:50 | |
"We're now going to give you the chance." | 0:27:50 | 0:27:53 | |
So my first thought was to become a Carmelite | 0:27:55 | 0:27:58 | |
but that doesn't work, you know, changing from one order to another. | 0:27:58 | 0:28:02 | |
It does for some people. It didn't work for me. | 0:28:02 | 0:28:04 | |
But the Carmel I tried to become a Carmelite in | 0:28:06 | 0:28:10 | |
said, "We think you ought to be a hermit," | 0:28:10 | 0:28:12 | |
and I'd never thought such a wonderful thing was even possible. | 0:28:12 | 0:28:16 | |
She sees the divine under all sorts of forms | 0:28:30 | 0:28:34 | |
and she's very willing to see God at work and communicating himself | 0:28:34 | 0:28:39 | |
and, I have to say, so do I. | 0:28:39 | 0:28:41 | |
I mean, I still think Christ is the absolute revelation of God | 0:28:41 | 0:28:48 | |
but I think he... He's known without being known, you know, | 0:28:48 | 0:28:52 | |
wherever I think there's goodness and grace, I think is Christ. | 0:28:52 | 0:28:56 | |
Jesus had a great need to pray | 0:29:05 | 0:29:07 | |
and he used to go off into the mountains | 0:29:07 | 0:29:10 | |
and spend the whole night in prayer. | 0:29:10 | 0:29:12 | |
Now, this time he took his three closest apostles with him - | 0:29:12 | 0:29:19 | |
Peter, James and John. | 0:29:19 | 0:29:22 | |
They would go up the mountain with Jesus and he would pray | 0:29:22 | 0:29:27 | |
and they would probably start praying and then they'd fall asleep. | 0:29:27 | 0:29:31 | |
But they woke up from sleep | 0:29:32 | 0:29:35 | |
and they got an enormous shock | 0:29:35 | 0:29:37 | |
because Jesus was transformed | 0:29:37 | 0:29:41 | |
and on either side were Moses, the law, the Ten Commandments, | 0:29:41 | 0:29:49 | |
and Elijah, the prophet. | 0:29:49 | 0:29:51 | |
Now, this was the most extraordinary thing for these three men. | 0:29:52 | 0:29:56 | |
There'd never seen Jesus like this. | 0:29:56 | 0:29:58 | |
He'd always looked just ordinary human | 0:29:58 | 0:30:01 | |
and Peter was absolutely overwhelmed. | 0:30:01 | 0:30:03 | |
Now, you might ask, why did this happen? | 0:30:03 | 0:30:06 | |
Why for once did he let them see him in glory? | 0:30:08 | 0:30:12 | |
Well, I think it's because he was strengthening them, | 0:30:14 | 0:30:17 | |
strengthening them against the terrible day | 0:30:17 | 0:30:20 | |
when they'd see him bleeding on the cross | 0:30:20 | 0:30:23 | |
and wouldn't want to accept it. | 0:30:23 | 0:30:25 | |
Now, I think this is the pattern of God. | 0:30:26 | 0:30:29 | |
He prepares us. | 0:30:29 | 0:30:31 | |
We may not know it's a preparation | 0:30:31 | 0:30:34 | |
but we will always be in the best position possible | 0:30:34 | 0:30:39 | |
to accept what comes to us. | 0:30:39 | 0:30:42 | |
We just have to trust him | 0:30:42 | 0:30:44 | |
and here you see trust portrayed. | 0:30:44 | 0:30:47 | |
The Carmelite Sisters bought Wendy this second-hand holiday caravan | 0:30:53 | 0:30:57 | |
when she became a hermit | 0:30:57 | 0:30:59 | |
and pitched it in the middle of a thicket. | 0:30:59 | 0:31:01 | |
After waiting so long to live in solitude, | 0:31:10 | 0:31:12 | |
she'd always regretted allowing her sanctuary to be filmed, | 0:31:12 | 0:31:16 | |
feeling somehow violated, | 0:31:16 | 0:31:19 | |
so when that first caravan eventually fell apart, | 0:31:19 | 0:31:22 | |
she refused to let anyone film its sturdier replacement. | 0:31:22 | 0:31:27 | |
But to give me an idea of how she lives, | 0:31:30 | 0:31:33 | |
the Sisters offered access to a very similar one | 0:31:33 | 0:31:36 | |
which is also used as a place for solitary prayer, | 0:31:36 | 0:31:39 | |
just a short walk away. | 0:31:39 | 0:31:41 | |
I really haven't got a caravan, literally, any more | 0:31:44 | 0:31:48 | |
because the Sisters got me a little prefab house | 0:31:48 | 0:31:52 | |
and it's got a bath in it | 0:31:52 | 0:31:55 | |
and it's got an inside lavatory! | 0:31:55 | 0:31:58 | |
Oh, these are great luxuries. Happy woman! | 0:31:58 | 0:32:02 | |
What was the original caravan like? | 0:32:02 | 0:32:04 | |
It was an old caravan they got for £60 | 0:32:04 | 0:32:08 | |
and it stood on blocks and was uninsulated | 0:32:08 | 0:32:13 | |
and it had a skylight which the rain came through. | 0:32:13 | 0:32:19 | |
But I loved it. | 0:32:19 | 0:32:22 | |
I didn't love not having a bath and not having an inside lavatory... | 0:32:22 | 0:32:27 | |
'..but I thought those were prices I should pay | 0:32:29 | 0:32:33 | |
'for the humbleness of my caravan. | 0:32:33 | 0:32:35 | |
'The Sisters gave me a very nice chair.' | 0:32:37 | 0:32:41 | |
That's my kind of official prayer place. | 0:32:41 | 0:32:44 | |
Are you able to make yourself a cup of tea? | 0:32:46 | 0:32:49 | |
Oh, yes. Coffee. | 0:32:49 | 0:32:51 | |
And that doesn't interrupt anything. | 0:32:52 | 0:32:56 | |
It's just a way of keeping me alert | 0:32:57 | 0:33:01 | |
because you've got to be there for God | 0:33:01 | 0:33:05 | |
in whatever way he's asking you to be there, | 0:33:05 | 0:33:09 | |
so one mustn't drowse off. | 0:33:09 | 0:33:12 | |
People tend to think that prayer is asking for things | 0:33:17 | 0:33:21 | |
and they've asked and asked and nothing's ever happened | 0:33:21 | 0:33:24 | |
so they think really, they just don't know how to do it | 0:33:24 | 0:33:27 | |
or they do know how to do it and God doesn't love them enough. | 0:33:27 | 0:33:31 | |
The solution to that goes deep. | 0:33:33 | 0:33:35 | |
You have to understand that when you pray for something, | 0:33:37 | 0:33:41 | |
God always hears you | 0:33:41 | 0:33:44 | |
but he isn't going to be a magician and shift your life around. | 0:33:44 | 0:33:48 | |
What he will do, always, is come and stand beside you | 0:33:50 | 0:33:55 | |
to help you to make the best of whatever is going to happen. | 0:33:55 | 0:33:59 | |
If it's going to be disaster, he'll be with you, helping you. | 0:33:59 | 0:34:04 | |
If it's going to be joy, | 0:34:04 | 0:34:06 | |
he'll be with you, helping you to say thank you. | 0:34:06 | 0:34:09 | |
All the Sisters here have a duty to support themselves if they can. | 0:34:14 | 0:34:19 | |
To earn money, | 0:34:19 | 0:34:20 | |
Wendy took on the mammoth task of translating several volumes of Latin | 0:34:20 | 0:34:25 | |
but her perfectionist zeal led to further illness. | 0:34:25 | 0:34:28 | |
During convalescence, she discovered art books | 0:34:30 | 0:34:33 | |
and a new way to earn money and realise her literary potential. | 0:34:33 | 0:34:37 | |
She began publishing articles | 0:34:37 | 0:34:39 | |
about paintings she'd only ever seen in reproduction. | 0:34:39 | 0:34:43 | |
Now, she's written over 30 books, | 0:34:43 | 0:34:46 | |
many with the help of the convent's priest. | 0:34:46 | 0:34:48 | |
'She's the brains of the outfit and I'm the brawn. | 0:34:50 | 0:34:53 | |
'I take care of logistics and the suitcases | 0:34:53 | 0:34:56 | |
'and pushing the wheelchair | 0:34:56 | 0:34:58 | |
'and making sure we get to the right place at the right time' | 0:34:58 | 0:35:01 | |
but as far as all creativity goes, | 0:35:01 | 0:35:04 | |
I just sit at her feet | 0:35:04 | 0:35:06 | |
and when she speaks, I type. | 0:35:06 | 0:35:08 | |
Over the last four or five years, | 0:35:12 | 0:35:14 | |
I've had the privilege of typing several of her books. | 0:35:14 | 0:35:18 | |
We find a place that's comfortable | 0:35:21 | 0:35:23 | |
and she will look at her art, for example, | 0:35:23 | 0:35:26 | |
the painting or the photograph of what she needs to comment on, | 0:35:26 | 0:35:30 | |
and she just begins to speak | 0:35:30 | 0:35:33 | |
and rarely has anything changed | 0:35:33 | 0:35:37 | |
but she's on target, she's concise, she's clear, | 0:35:37 | 0:35:41 | |
she's very understandable | 0:35:41 | 0:35:45 | |
and she's very engaging. | 0:35:45 | 0:35:47 | |
I think people relate to her way of describing things | 0:35:47 | 0:35:51 | |
because it's so real and human. | 0:35:51 | 0:35:53 | |
I went with Wendy on her first filming trip to Europe 20 years ago. | 0:35:58 | 0:36:03 | |
She enjoyed seeing paintings familiar from books | 0:36:03 | 0:36:06 | |
for the first time | 0:36:06 | 0:36:07 | |
but still wished she was back in her caravan. | 0:36:07 | 0:36:09 | |
-Now, put on the brake or I'll fall back. -Brake's on. | 0:36:18 | 0:36:21 | |
-Just put these up... -Right. | 0:36:23 | 0:36:25 | |
Thank you. | 0:36:28 | 0:36:30 | |
I wanted to return to this conflict you feel between... | 0:36:43 | 0:36:46 | |
I don't feel this conflict! You're the one who thinks of the conflict. | 0:36:46 | 0:36:50 | |
Well, the conflict, I think, OK, my idea, | 0:36:50 | 0:36:54 | |
you said several times that you much prefer to be back in your real life | 0:36:54 | 0:37:00 | |
and that this is somehow almost a penance. | 0:37:00 | 0:37:03 | |
That's too strong, but yes, it's an aberration. | 0:37:03 | 0:37:07 | |
It's...it's... | 0:37:07 | 0:37:10 | |
I've stepped out of my real life but I haven't stepped out of God's life. | 0:37:10 | 0:37:15 | |
-Yeah. -This is equally prayer, what we're doing, | 0:37:15 | 0:37:19 | |
because prayer really is that intentness on God, | 0:37:19 | 0:37:23 | |
which doesn't stop when you get off your knees. | 0:37:23 | 0:37:26 | |
It goes on, but in another form. | 0:37:26 | 0:37:29 | |
And it keeps your eyes towards God | 0:37:30 | 0:37:33 | |
so you can see him in the most unlikely of circumstances, | 0:37:33 | 0:37:37 | |
even in a television programme. | 0:37:37 | 0:37:38 | |
Wendy is making this journey to Paris | 0:37:49 | 0:37:51 | |
to show us a masterpiece in the Louvre | 0:37:51 | 0:37:54 | |
which tells the story of a vulnerable woman. | 0:37:54 | 0:37:57 | |
Jesus is teaching in the temple | 0:38:01 | 0:38:04 | |
when suddenly, | 0:38:04 | 0:38:05 | |
there bursts in a crowd of angry men, | 0:38:05 | 0:38:10 | |
dragging with them a poor, bewildered, frightened woman. | 0:38:10 | 0:38:16 | |
And they surge up to Jesus and say, | 0:38:18 | 0:38:21 | |
"This woman was caught in the very act of adultery, | 0:38:21 | 0:38:25 | |
"in flagrante delicto, | 0:38:25 | 0:38:28 | |
"and the law says such a woman should be stoned to death. | 0:38:28 | 0:38:34 | |
"What do you say, master?" | 0:38:34 | 0:38:36 | |
Now, of course, they want to show that Jesus does not keep the law. | 0:38:36 | 0:38:41 | |
They also know that nothing would make Jesus stone anybody to death. | 0:38:41 | 0:38:46 | |
Look at their faces - so smug, | 0:38:46 | 0:38:49 | |
so triumphant. They've got him. | 0:38:49 | 0:38:51 | |
And Jesus doesn't answer them. | 0:38:52 | 0:38:55 | |
He won't take the high seat of judgement | 0:38:55 | 0:38:59 | |
and then he says, | 0:38:59 | 0:39:02 | |
"Let the man who has no sin cast the first stone." | 0:39:02 | 0:39:07 | |
And there's a terrible pause | 0:39:09 | 0:39:13 | |
as they all realise what Jesus is saying. | 0:39:13 | 0:39:16 | |
And the Gospel tells us | 0:39:17 | 0:39:20 | |
that they began to go away, each man, | 0:39:20 | 0:39:24 | |
beginning with the oldest, | 0:39:24 | 0:39:26 | |
the ones who were most certain that they had Jesus in their power. | 0:39:26 | 0:39:31 | |
Jesus then says to the woman, | 0:39:33 | 0:39:37 | |
"Does no man condemn you?" | 0:39:37 | 0:39:39 | |
And the poor creature sort of quavers back, "No man, Lord." | 0:39:41 | 0:39:46 | |
And Jesus says, "Neither do I condemn you. | 0:39:46 | 0:39:50 | |
"Go away, and do not sin again." | 0:39:50 | 0:39:54 | |
You were asking me about my childhood... | 0:40:19 | 0:40:22 | |
..and I told you about that transformative experience | 0:40:24 | 0:40:28 | |
when I was four. | 0:40:28 | 0:40:30 | |
Which I think has influenced everything I have done since, | 0:40:30 | 0:40:36 | |
that awareness of God has never left me. | 0:40:36 | 0:40:40 | |
And you asked me | 0:40:41 | 0:40:44 | |
were there any other experiences and I said to you | 0:40:44 | 0:40:47 | |
I didn't want to talk about anything else, | 0:40:47 | 0:40:50 | |
but I thought there was one, | 0:40:50 | 0:40:52 | |
it wasn't an experience, it was an insight, | 0:40:52 | 0:40:55 | |
when I made my first Holy Communion. | 0:40:55 | 0:40:58 | |
Because I had got it into my head, whether Sister said so or not, | 0:41:00 | 0:41:05 | |
that Jesus would speak to us when he came to us in Holy Communion | 0:41:05 | 0:41:11 | |
and I was longing to hear him speak | 0:41:11 | 0:41:17 | |
and what would he say? | 0:41:17 | 0:41:19 | |
And I remember so clearly coming back from Holy Communion | 0:41:20 | 0:41:23 | |
in my white dress with my white veil along with other little | 0:41:23 | 0:41:28 | |
first communicants and waiting... | 0:41:28 | 0:41:30 | |
And there was silence. | 0:41:32 | 0:41:34 | |
And then, it suddenly dawned upon me | 0:41:36 | 0:41:40 | |
that's how he speaks. | 0:41:40 | 0:41:41 | |
God speaks to us in silence. | 0:41:43 | 0:41:45 | |
And that also has been something that has mattered a great deal to me, | 0:41:47 | 0:41:52 | |
to know that when we're silent... | 0:41:52 | 0:41:55 | |
..and looking at God, | 0:41:57 | 0:41:59 | |
he will communicate himself, silently. | 0:41:59 | 0:42:02 | |
It never entered my head at any stage of my childhood, | 0:42:21 | 0:42:25 | |
that I might get married and become...a mother. | 0:42:25 | 0:42:30 | |
The vow of celibacy wasn't a sacrifice for you? | 0:42:31 | 0:42:35 | |
No, it's more than celibacy, it's chastity. | 0:42:35 | 0:42:37 | |
Which means that you take no sexual pleasure. | 0:42:39 | 0:42:43 | |
It's something that you give up, not just marriage, | 0:42:45 | 0:42:48 | |
but any form of sexual pleasure, | 0:42:48 | 0:42:50 | |
you offer it to God for the sake of the world. | 0:42:50 | 0:42:54 | |
But, you know, because it's not cost me anything, I think I have got a... | 0:42:54 | 0:43:00 | |
..a vacancy in me... | 0:43:03 | 0:43:05 | |
that where most human beings have a capacity | 0:43:05 | 0:43:09 | |
for sexual response, I just haven't. | 0:43:09 | 0:43:12 | |
I don't understand it. | 0:43:14 | 0:43:16 | |
I've never felt any inclination... | 0:43:16 | 0:43:20 | |
..and said no, no I can't. | 0:43:21 | 0:43:24 | |
I just don't... It means nothing to me. | 0:43:24 | 0:43:27 | |
Which means I haven't got that... | 0:43:27 | 0:43:29 | |
..gift to give to God. | 0:43:31 | 0:43:33 | |
Instead, Wendy sees her gift to God as dedication to | 0:43:44 | 0:43:48 | |
a life of prayer - six hours of silent contemplation every day. | 0:43:48 | 0:43:54 | |
One of the things prayer will do | 0:43:58 | 0:44:00 | |
is to show you the truth about yourself | 0:44:00 | 0:44:03 | |
and that's something most of us go to a lot of trouble to avoid. | 0:44:03 | 0:44:07 | |
But you see, all deep experience, in some ways, does that. | 0:44:07 | 0:44:12 | |
Great art does that. It challenges you. | 0:44:12 | 0:44:16 | |
It raises you to a new level, but you have to accept | 0:44:16 | 0:44:19 | |
you are on a lower level. | 0:44:19 | 0:44:22 | |
Tintoretto was fascinated | 0:44:29 | 0:44:32 | |
by the mystery of Jesus washing the Apostles' feet. | 0:44:32 | 0:44:36 | |
He painted it several times. | 0:44:36 | 0:44:39 | |
He was fascinated by the interplay of emotions, | 0:44:39 | 0:44:43 | |
the embarrassment of the Apostles, | 0:44:43 | 0:44:46 | |
the certainty of Jesus. | 0:44:46 | 0:44:49 | |
It happened at the Last Supper and remember, | 0:44:49 | 0:44:51 | |
that was the last full day on earth he ever had. | 0:44:51 | 0:44:56 | |
He got up from the table, | 0:44:56 | 0:44:58 | |
took off his garments. | 0:44:58 | 0:45:00 | |
Tintoretto modestly just wanted him to take off one garment, | 0:45:00 | 0:45:05 | |
the beautiful blue one on the chair. | 0:45:05 | 0:45:07 | |
Put a towel round his waist, got a bowl full of water, | 0:45:07 | 0:45:11 | |
knelt down before the nearest apostle and washed his feet. | 0:45:11 | 0:45:17 | |
Tintoretto seizes upon the central moment when Jesus comes to Peter. | 0:45:17 | 0:45:25 | |
And Peter says, "Lord, are you going to wash my feet?" | 0:45:25 | 0:45:30 | |
And Jesus says, "Peter, you don't understand it now. | 0:45:30 | 0:45:34 | |
"One day you will understand." | 0:45:34 | 0:45:38 | |
"No", says Peter. "You will never wash my feet." | 0:45:38 | 0:45:42 | |
And Jesus says, "If I don't wash you, Peter, | 0:45:42 | 0:45:46 | |
"you will have no part in me." | 0:45:46 | 0:45:48 | |
And then, of course, Peter wants his whole self washed, | 0:45:48 | 0:45:53 | |
anything to have a part with Jesus. | 0:45:53 | 0:45:55 | |
And when he'd finished, Jesus dressed again and sat down and said to them, | 0:45:55 | 0:46:00 | |
"Do you understand what I have done?" | 0:46:00 | 0:46:02 | |
"I have acted towards you like a servant | 0:46:03 | 0:46:08 | |
"and that's how you should act towards other people." | 0:46:08 | 0:46:11 | |
SACRED MUSIC | 0:46:11 | 0:46:15 | |
For Wendy, at the heart of both her faith | 0:46:21 | 0:46:24 | |
and daily self-discipline, is a celebration of Mass. | 0:46:24 | 0:46:28 | |
The service is the re-enactment of the climactic scene | 0:46:35 | 0:46:40 | |
of the Last Supper, | 0:46:40 | 0:46:41 | |
a key Gospel story with the specific purpose of remembering Jesus. | 0:46:41 | 0:46:46 | |
-PRIEST: -At the time he was betrayed and entered willingly | 0:46:48 | 0:46:52 | |
into his Passion, he took bread and gave thanks, | 0:46:52 | 0:46:56 | |
broke it and gave it to his disciples saying, | 0:46:56 | 0:47:01 | |
"Take this, all of you and eat it. | 0:47:01 | 0:47:04 | |
"This is my body, which will be given up for you." | 0:47:06 | 0:47:11 | |
BELL TOLLS | 0:47:11 | 0:47:14 | |
-The body of Christ. -Amen. | 0:47:17 | 0:47:19 | |
-The body of Christ. -Amen. | 0:47:21 | 0:47:23 | |
-The body of Christ. -Amen. | 0:47:25 | 0:47:27 | |
Jesus knew that plots were being laid to kill him. | 0:47:27 | 0:47:32 | |
He had very little time left so this last supper | 0:47:32 | 0:47:37 | |
was his one great chance | 0:47:37 | 0:47:40 | |
to make it clear to the Apostles what he was all about. | 0:47:40 | 0:47:44 | |
That his great commandment was love. | 0:47:45 | 0:47:48 | |
And to underline his point about love, | 0:47:48 | 0:47:51 | |
Jesus had saved for this last supper, | 0:47:51 | 0:47:55 | |
the great sign of his love, | 0:47:55 | 0:47:58 | |
apart from his actual death on the cross, | 0:47:58 | 0:48:00 | |
that forerunner of that death, | 0:48:00 | 0:48:02 | |
that he would give them his body and his blood. | 0:48:02 | 0:48:07 | |
Now, separating body and blood means death, | 0:48:09 | 0:48:12 | |
but this was the living Jesus and it's the living body | 0:48:12 | 0:48:16 | |
and blood he is giving them and here Poussin shows that sacred moment. | 0:48:16 | 0:48:21 | |
Jesus had stood up from the table and called them round him. | 0:48:21 | 0:48:27 | |
You can see there two tiers of Apostles - the ones at the back | 0:48:27 | 0:48:31 | |
are absolutely dumbfounded, | 0:48:31 | 0:48:35 | |
they don't understand what he means. | 0:48:35 | 0:48:38 | |
So, while the outer ones are astonished, | 0:48:40 | 0:48:43 | |
the inner rank, his closest friends - | 0:48:43 | 0:48:46 | |
Peter, James and John - they know what's going to happen | 0:48:46 | 0:48:51 | |
and Poussin has left that space in the centre, | 0:48:51 | 0:48:56 | |
there is the chalice, | 0:48:56 | 0:48:58 | |
there's the consecrating hand of Jesus, | 0:48:58 | 0:49:02 | |
the other hand holds the bits of bread that are his body | 0:49:02 | 0:49:08 | |
and beneath the chalice, just a crease in the tablecloth, | 0:49:08 | 0:49:13 | |
is the cross. | 0:49:13 | 0:49:16 | |
And the whole of that makes a still, quiet space, | 0:49:16 | 0:49:21 | |
which we need for prayer. | 0:49:21 | 0:49:25 | |
I once said I thought you could define humanity | 0:49:48 | 0:49:53 | |
as people who prayed | 0:49:53 | 0:49:55 | |
and I was met with rather cynical laughter. | 0:49:55 | 0:49:59 | |
And my friend said, "What about these dreadful louts and yobbos | 0:50:01 | 0:50:08 | |
"and murderers? | 0:50:08 | 0:50:10 | |
"They don't pray" and I said, "How do you know?" | 0:50:10 | 0:50:13 | |
I said, "I'll bet there has never been a person, | 0:50:13 | 0:50:17 | |
"who hasn't perhaps in the night, | 0:50:17 | 0:50:20 | |
"had that sense of longing and incompleteness | 0:50:20 | 0:50:23 | |
"and shame at what they are and that's prayer. | 0:50:23 | 0:50:27 | |
"It's not explicit prayer, but it's real prayer. | 0:50:27 | 0:50:30 | |
"I think we're made to pray because God made us for himself." | 0:50:30 | 0:50:33 | |
This little picture by Antonello just gives us | 0:50:48 | 0:50:52 | |
a glimpse of what it meant to Jesus to die for us. | 0:50:52 | 0:50:56 | |
He's been tied to the pillar while they scourge him. | 0:50:56 | 0:51:01 | |
Thorns have been pressed into his head, | 0:51:01 | 0:51:04 | |
you can just see the drops of blood | 0:51:04 | 0:51:07 | |
and one tear comes from his eyes, | 0:51:07 | 0:51:10 | |
but he endures. | 0:51:10 | 0:51:12 | |
Here is a brave man, | 0:51:12 | 0:51:15 | |
accepting death out of love. | 0:51:15 | 0:51:18 | |
I find it painful to look at a crucifixion. | 0:51:20 | 0:51:23 | |
The only ones I like are those that show in the death, the resurrection. | 0:51:24 | 0:51:29 | |
Because that's what it's all about - | 0:51:29 | 0:51:32 | |
he passed through death and out again. | 0:51:32 | 0:51:35 | |
This is the first age in which there has been very little silence | 0:51:46 | 0:51:51 | |
unless it's sought for. | 0:51:51 | 0:51:53 | |
Nearly everybody can live their whole life being entertained | 0:51:57 | 0:52:00 | |
and that's very dangerous because it means you are never | 0:52:00 | 0:52:04 | |
in contact, except at night, | 0:52:04 | 0:52:07 | |
with what you are. | 0:52:07 | 0:52:09 | |
So although I think the longings and the needs are the same | 0:52:09 | 0:52:15 | |
in all ages | 0:52:15 | 0:52:17 | |
and the greed and the selfishness, | 0:52:17 | 0:52:21 | |
this age has got this great obstacle to prayer - | 0:52:21 | 0:52:26 | |
constant entertainment. | 0:52:26 | 0:52:29 | |
And I think people really have to say, I am going to have a period | 0:52:29 | 0:52:34 | |
in which I can just be silent. | 0:52:34 | 0:52:36 | |
This story begins on Easter Sunday evening, | 0:52:56 | 0:53:00 | |
outside Jerusalem. | 0:53:00 | 0:53:02 | |
The Apostles had been devastated by what had happened to Jesus. | 0:53:02 | 0:53:08 | |
Not only his death, but his execution on the cross. | 0:53:08 | 0:53:12 | |
He'd said he was the life and the resurrection | 0:53:12 | 0:53:15 | |
and they were certain he was right | 0:53:15 | 0:53:18 | |
and now, everything's come to nothing. | 0:53:18 | 0:53:20 | |
So, two of them, Cleophus and another, | 0:53:22 | 0:53:26 | |
decide to leave Jerusalem. | 0:53:26 | 0:53:29 | |
It just reminds them of their terrible disappointment. | 0:53:29 | 0:53:33 | |
So they set out to their little home town of Emmaus, | 0:53:33 | 0:53:37 | |
a few miles away, and as they travelled, | 0:53:37 | 0:53:39 | |
another traveller joined them | 0:53:39 | 0:53:42 | |
and said, "What are you talking about so earnestly?" | 0:53:42 | 0:53:45 | |
And they say, "Haven't you heard? | 0:53:45 | 0:53:47 | |
"Everybody's heard how Jesus of Nazareth, our great prophet, | 0:53:47 | 0:53:51 | |
"has been crucified." | 0:53:51 | 0:53:53 | |
They do not recognise him. | 0:53:53 | 0:53:56 | |
He's just another traveller. | 0:53:56 | 0:53:59 | |
And then, oh, how I'd have loved to have been on that journey to Emmaus, | 0:53:59 | 0:54:02 | |
Jesus begins to explain to them, | 0:54:02 | 0:54:06 | |
"Don't you know that the Christ must suffer | 0:54:06 | 0:54:10 | |
"and so enter into his glory, | 0:54:10 | 0:54:13 | |
"that only the redemption through a suffering servant, | 0:54:13 | 0:54:18 | |
"not a great heroic victor." | 0:54:18 | 0:54:21 | |
They're so engrossed by this, | 0:54:23 | 0:54:26 | |
that when they get to the inn where they're going to stay and Jesus | 0:54:26 | 0:54:30 | |
makes as if he is going to go on, they beg him, come and eat with us. | 0:54:30 | 0:54:34 | |
And they sit down in the little inn | 0:54:35 | 0:54:39 | |
and Jesus takes the bread, | 0:54:39 | 0:54:42 | |
blesses it and breaks it. | 0:54:42 | 0:54:46 | |
And in that moment, they knew who it was, it was Jesus. | 0:54:46 | 0:54:51 | |
He had risen and they've no sooner seen him, | 0:54:51 | 0:54:55 | |
than he disappears. | 0:54:55 | 0:54:57 | |
Now, of course one can see a big lesson for us. | 0:54:57 | 0:55:02 | |
The stranger may be Jesus. | 0:55:02 | 0:55:04 | |
You may not recognise him, | 0:55:07 | 0:55:09 | |
but the person to whom you are speaking is Jesus in another form. | 0:55:09 | 0:55:14 | |
And of course, the way to get close to Jesus | 0:55:14 | 0:55:18 | |
is through Holy Communion when you receive him and know him. | 0:55:18 | 0:55:24 | |
We know him in the breaking of the bread. | 0:55:24 | 0:55:28 | |
I think I am an inadequate woman, | 0:55:51 | 0:55:55 | |
lacking many things that make | 0:55:55 | 0:55:58 | |
a full and beautiful character, but it doesn't matter, | 0:55:58 | 0:56:03 | |
because that's how I am and that's the self I have to give to God | 0:56:03 | 0:56:07 | |
for him to take to himself. | 0:56:07 | 0:56:11 | |
I mean, life is short. | 0:56:14 | 0:56:16 | |
If you can give it to God, it uses it all. | 0:56:16 | 0:56:20 | |
That's why I don't believe in this happiness, unhappiness business, | 0:56:22 | 0:56:27 | |
you know, you take what comes and you give it to God. | 0:56:27 | 0:56:30 | |
And if it hurts, he will use that for the world as healing. | 0:56:32 | 0:56:38 | |
I don't think we're all that important. | 0:56:38 | 0:56:40 | |
We're only important to God, not to ourselves. | 0:56:40 | 0:56:43 | |
I remember whenever we filmed, | 0:56:55 | 0:56:57 | |
there was always this little bit of filming | 0:56:57 | 0:57:00 | |
that you really, really enjoyed. | 0:57:00 | 0:57:02 | |
-Do you remember what it was? -Wrap. It's a wrap! | 0:57:02 | 0:57:04 | |
I know, I know the bit I enjoy! | 0:57:08 | 0:57:10 | |
The one bit of filming I always enjoy, when we're finished | 0:57:10 | 0:57:14 | |
and the sound man says, "Now, can we just have silence?" | 0:57:14 | 0:57:17 | |
And we all just stay there for a minute or two... | 0:57:19 | 0:57:24 | |
..giving ourselves to God | 0:57:26 | 0:57:28 | |
and if that's not in the other people's mind, | 0:57:28 | 0:57:30 | |
well, I am giving them to God. | 0:57:30 | 0:57:33 | |
That's the bit I like. | 0:57:33 | 0:57:35 | |
Shall we have a minute of silence now? | 0:57:35 | 0:57:38 | |
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd | 0:59:03 | 0:59:08 |