Glamour Models, Mum and Me

My name's Georgia Howes, I'm 14.

When I grow up I want to be an architect, actress

and maybe a glamour model, but I'm not sure yet.

My mum wants me to be a glamour model.

That's it. That's the one.

Adolescence is awkward enough for most teenagers,

but what would it be like if your mum was kiss-and-tell queen,

topless model and plastic surgery addict Alicia Douvall?

-I need it.

-You don't need plastic surgery.

It's not a need.

Georgia and Alicia have an extraordinary relationship.

I am, a lot of the time, the mother and she's the daughter sometimes. We swap around.

She's more like a sister to me.

Georgia's supposed to be this gorgeous next top model and all she does is study biology

and Macbeth. She came from my womb! How can she be that different?

This film follows them on an unforgettable trip to America...

The bandages are coming off!

-Wasn't quite the holiday we thought it would be, is it?

-No.

-You're having a go at me!

-No, I'm not.

-You are!

There's certain things in the relationship you want to change.

..as Alicia's past collides with Georgia's future.

I'm still trying to decide what to do with my life.

When she was 12, Georgia announced she wanted a boob job like her mum.

Two years on, she's developed opinions of her own.

You're a bad influence. You want me to do topless modelling.

-It's not a bad influence.

-It is.

-Welcome to the real world.

I'm not going to just ruin my career...

It didn't do Jordan any harm. Or me.

-It just cuts out the competition. If you're prepared to do topless, a lot of girls aren't...

-Exactly!

That's for a reason.

It's easier, you get more money, you get guaranteed work

and you'll become famous within... days for taking your top off. How easy is that?

'Being a woman is powerful.

'That's what I try to teach her.'

That's the most important lesson you can teach a girl. Know what? This...is going to get you far.

Britney Spears had a boob job at 16. You've got two years left.

Well, I don't want a boob job, so I don't have two years left.

-She'll change her mind.

-I will not!

I will not.

'Before, I was more...'

I wanted surgery because I thought, "Well, she's had it. It's normal. It's just something that you do."

But I think I've been put off of it because I've seen her have so many operations go wrong.

-Do I know best?

-Yes, you know best.

Thank you. Really, you slag me off and stuff,

-but at the end of the day, you know I'm right. That's why you follow my lead, isn't it?

-Yeah.

One, two, three!

Mwah!

You've got to do this.

Like that. One, two, three!

Mwah!

-I don't know what you did there.

-I just go...

-OK.

-If you're going to be a model, you've got to do it.

-Just tell me what you want me to do!

-Like that.

That's it!

With the eyebrow. I can't do that. My face is paralysed. I can't do the eyebrow.

OK, now do it to camera nicely. Go with the eyebrow like that.

-Like...

-To the camera. Yes! That's the one.

Good girl.

It's Saturday morning. Alicia's preparing for a photo shoot,

leaving Georgia to a full morning of homework.

Georgia goes to an exclusive boarding school in Kent.

She spends weekends and holidays in London with her mum.

-Will you do your piano practice today, Georgia?

-Mm-hm.

-And can you walk the dog for me?

-Yep.

-Chemistry.

-Chemistry.

I have to do page 53, question 5.

-Boring(!)

-Yeah.

-And what else have you got to do?

That's it. The Chemistry will take me about an hour.

-That's an hour wasted.

-But I have to do the Chemistry, otherwise you get a minus.

All it takes is another little cross across it and you've got a plus!

Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Put pressure on for your piano because that's a talent.

-Singing and acting.

-Mm-hm.

-Cos they're actual talents.

Chemistry.

-You don't need that. That comes naturally.

-Does it?

It does, honestly. Naturally.

So you know what sodium sulphate plus magnesium... magnesium oxide is?

And?

I could become a chemistry-ologist or...you know.

I could cure cancer because of that textbook.

-Do it, then.

-Yeah.

You can text me and tell me how it goes.

-You text me. Keep in touch.

-I will.

-See you later!

-Bye!

-Bye! Love you lots!

-Love you, too.

"Experiment to investigate the rate of decomposition on a hydrogen peroxide solution

"in the presence of magnesium oxide." Yeah. Sounds interesting.

SHE PLAYS

No.

I enjoy acting and music and things.

I like that when you're acting you can just do what you want, really,

be another character.

When I'm acting, it makes me feel more alive, I suppose, and there's not as many troubles

and you can pretend to be someone else, learn about them, and all their emotions and feelings.

Although Georgia's never met her real father, her godfather Paul has been a family friend for years.

When Georgia was a baby, Alicia was abandoned, homeless and sleeping in a hostel.

-Hello!

-He helped Alicia out of a tough situation

and has always taken a keen interest in Georgia's education.

These are all home-made, by the way.

-Mmm!

-Aaah!

-Georgia!

There you go. Someone's happy.

-That's yours. Look at that - yum!

-She won't eat a whole one.

Do your best. There you go.

Alicia wants Georgia to skip sixth form in favour of stage school. Paul has other ideas.

If you've got your A Levels and a degree,

not in Medieval Literature, but if you've got a degree in drama and arts,

apart from anything else, you've had three years of drinking lager, wearing funny clothes,

having no responsibility, wandering around Europe on your weeks off. That's not too bad, is it?

But if she goes to drama school, it's what she wants to do.

I think she's such a good actress that she will make it anyway. She doesn't need a back-up plan.

-Keira Knightley made it.

-And then you can't get a proper job ever cos you're stuck.

That's that. You'll wander around the world, never have any money...

-Like Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt...

-Living hand to mouth.

What Alicia, to me, needs to do

'is to let go of her own frustrated ambitions.

'And say, look,'

Georgia's going to make her own choices in life, in due course.

Give her all the different opportunities that she can have so she has the biggest range of choice.

Despite his different views, Paul does understand Alicia's mindset.

Georgia's now unfurling her wings and she's getting ready to leave the nest and Alicia's scared.

And Alicia's trying to kind of keep her in the church of glamour

because that's what Alicia knows and feels safe with.

"If Georgia becomes a chartered accountant or a vet, I've lost her."

'This morning, Georgia and Alicia are off to a cosmetics clinic.'

-Is your routine in the morning as complicated as your mum's routine?

-Em...

I don't know if it's as complicated, maybe. I just wash my face, brush my teeth.

-You don't like wearing that much makeup?

-No, I don't really.

I think it's bad for your skin, really, and your eyelashes and things.

-So you like to look natural?

-Yeah.

'Alicia's going to get her lipstick and eyebrows tattooed on, while Georgia is just in for a manicure.'

My mum does look pretty when she wears all her makeup and her dress and everything.

-Do you think she's beautiful?

-Yeah, I do think she's beautiful.

I'm not sure if she thinks she's beautiful.

We had a discussion before and she said,

"I'm not perfect." I said, "No one is perfect." And she said, "I'm far off perfect, though."

Georgie, are you ready, darling?

Because my mum is quite obsessed with her appearance, I think it makes me not so obsessed.

Basically, I'd like to get rid of... I've got this. I'm not sure if it's my own fat.

I had filler put in years ago and it's not permanent filler but it's never come out.

I like to look nice. It's nice when people say, "Oh, you look nice."

I don't think I try that hard. It's an all-girls school. It doesn't really matter.

I think a lot of people judge you at the moment because in magazines

there's people who look really pretty.

A lot of people in my school are pressured by that.

So this is the opposite to filler. I'm having filler taken out.

I made mistakes before.

This man's going to sort them out, sort all my mistakes in life out.

Now it sometimes feels like an electric shock, sometimes warm

and if you leave it, it gets hot.

OK, a tiny scratch coming up.

Well done. Very good. Now...

Let me know if you feel anything.

Ahh! Yeah.

As well as her firm views on body image, having a celebrity mum has also given Georgia

an interesting perspective on fame.

Most girls in my class probably want to be famous and do singing and acting.

A lot of people want fame like Britney

or an actress, the red carpet and everything.

And what about you? Do you really want to be famous?

I wouldn't... I wouldn't want to be famous, but I want to be an actress

and I want to be successful at it and to enjoy what I'm doing.

I like acting, so I'd enjoy it. I wouldn't do it just for fame.

-Georgia, when you're older, are you wanting to have all this done...?

-No.

-You'd stay more natural?

-Yeah, I'm fine with my own eyebrows,

just having them, you know.

Thank you!

Your eyelashes and your eyebrows look really good.

You look lovely.

-So do you.

-Are you pleased with it?

# Don't wanna be second best

# Don't wanna stand in line Don't wanna fall behind... #

Although Alicia is keen to see her daughter rise to stardom,

she still worries about the damaging effects her notoriety could have on Georgia.

It's Sunday morning. A secret affair between Alicia and England's football captain John Terry

has hit the papers. It's dragged Alicia into one of the biggest tabloid scandals of the year.

Georgia's doing her Duke of Edinburgh camping and stuff

so she's all right.

I'm pleased she's not around anyway today,

because of the paper.

-Because of what?

-You know. (The paper.)

It's nice to protect her from that, you know.

Does it worry you, her seeing the papers sometimes?

I wouldn't like to think my mum's a slag, would you?

Not many 14-year-olds have got their mother in the newspaper...

..being linked to footballers.

A few days later, Alicia's decided to tell Georgia to stop her hearing it from someone else first.

-Georgie turns a blind eye to my antics.

-Yeah.

I don't know. It's just... I'm not going to have a go at you or something, am I?

Basically, I was in the papers with this whole John Terry thing. Just vaguely I was part of it.

And obviously it's not very nice and it's not true. Well, it is true, but it's exaggerated in the papers

to make me look like a slapper.

Did anyone talk to you about it, Georgia? Did anyone you know see it?

-No, no one told me about it.

-That's good, that's good.

-I don't think many of my 14-year-old friends read...

-The papers.

-Yeah.

-So it's fine.

So no harm done there, then.

Just ignore it, you know.

-I do anyway.

-And you know I'm not like that. Mummy doesn't climb in the back of cars, does she?

-No.

-So it doesn't really bother you, then, Georgia?

-No, it doesn't affect me, really.

-What counts is that I'm a good mother.

-Yeah.

I'm proud that she's kind of amazing. She's done something with her life and everything.

But every time she's in a magazine, there's always a positive part,

but I'd say 60% of the magazine is always a negative part.

So I never want to read them, really, cos it's not what I want to hear about her.

I know more cos I live with her and I talk to her.

-It's not a best friend!

-We hang out together, do everything together!

-You're not a best friend, though.

-Oh, thanks(!)

-You're related to me! You're like a best friend in a different way! You're my mum!

You can't be more than one thing.

-Hard as nails, this girl. Hard as nails.

-I love you, too. You're the best friend I ever had(!)

-I was only joking!

-Oh, I forgot to laugh, it was so funny(!)

Right. Water.

-I am your friend really, though, aren't I?

-Mm-hm.

-Thank you.

Although Georgia seems relatively unfazed by tabloid gossip,

one thing in her mum's life does concern her - Alicia's addiction to plastic surgery.

Despite being diagnosed with body dysmorphia, she's now planning her 16th boob job.

-Everyone says she has big boobs.

-I haven't got big boobs.

-You have!

-OK?

-I've got big as in normal big, but I haven't got big, big.

-But no one wants big, big.

-I want big, big.

-You don't.

-I do.

-Well, you go do that.

-That's what I'm trying to do.

-You'll regret it and get smaller again!

-I'm just saying you'll regret it. There's no-one to stop you.

-I need it.

-You don't need plastic surgery. It's not a need.

-I do need it. You don't understand.

It's like me needing...I don't know. A bag. I've already got one.

I haven't... Georgia, you said yourself my face needs doing.

-No, you don't.

-You said it yourself.

If you want to do something to your face, you can, but you don't need to touch anything else, OK?

-How can I get my face done if I don't get my boobs done?

-That has nothing to do with your face!

It's only a little bit, a size bigger. Might as well at the same time...

You're making me lose this game, I'm afraid. You don't need anything done to your boobs.

-I just need...

-You don't!

If you get your boobs bigger, you'll just look like an ugly blow-up doll.

-What do you know about body dysmorphia?

-It's when you're obsessed with your appearance

and you, em...

..you just want to change it all the time when you see someone else. You think you're ugly.

-Do you think it has affected you?

-No, not really.

Maybe.

-I don't know.

-I haven't got body dysmorphia, though, so this is pointless.

No, you haven't got body dysmorphia. You're just in denial.

-She doesn't care.

-I do care, but you've led me to the point of not caring

because you don't give me a choice. You said yourself, you can do what you want.

I can't tell you what to do, so...

You know?

If you enjoy...having surgery, then whatever makes you happy.

Everything's back to front in this house!

Even the dog's back to front.

Alicia's been told by therapists that her problems stem from abuse she suffered during her childhood.

'I think'

it does sometimes get me down, maybe.

-What does? What gets you down?

-Her having surgery, I suppose.

I think she's wasting her time, money and pain

on just having surgery that she doesn't need done.

It's like a therapy that she feels she has to have.

It's like who wants to go and see someone in their family go and have an operation

for something? And the fact that she's self-inflicting it. No point.

It's half-term and Alicia's taking Georgia on one of their regular trips to Los Angeles.

She's planned for Georgia to meet a model agency there who are interested in signing her up.

# Go west Paradise is there

# You'll have all that you can eat

# Of milk and honey over there

# You'll be the brightest star the world has ever seen

# Sun-baked slender heroine

# Of film and magazine... #

Unfortunately, the holiday hasn't got off to the best start.

Can I just say, Cindy, I'm deformed right now? I feel awful.

I am absolutely devastated. I've looked in the mirror and my breast is completely deformed.

OK, but can I just explain to you? It's very hard for me to do a picture and it's clear what's happened.

The implant I can see, because I'm skinny, has flipped upside down.

It's literally happened overnight.

I got here last night so it might have been the plane journey. I don't know how.

But I woke up, got in the shower and my breast is deformed.

It's bulky at the top and nothing at the bottom.

Yeah, but I am seriously needing to sort this out right now. I am deformed.

I don't want to spend a minute looking like this.

I don't...

This morning, when I got up with my mum,

her breast implant has turned.

So at the moment she's just trying to get someone to help her with it and sort it out.

I don't know what to do.

-There's nothing you can do.

-I have to be proactive!

-You have to wait for them to do it.

-I can't just sit here and wait for a phone call!

I have to do something.

Today we're supposed to be going to a model agency,

but we have to sort this out first.

You look nice.

-Thank you. You do, too.

-No, I don't, Georgie.

-You do. I was thinking that.

-I don't look good! I don't.

-You look lovely.

-Thank you.

-So I'll take you to your modelling agency, yeah?

-Yeah.

-You want to go?

-Yep.

All right.

You look pretty. It would be a shame not to go.

# There's a drumming noise inside my head that starts when you're around

# I swear that you could hear it... #

If the agency decide to sign Georgia up, today could mark the start of a Stateside modelling career,

following in the footsteps of her mum.

The main thing for me is just to get this done. I'm a model. I've had to cancel two shoots already

because I can't work with my breast implant upside down.

You've got to go in there with loads of confidence. Shoulders back.

You've got to fake it until you make it, yeah?

-Hi.

-Hi.

-How are you?

-What's your name?

-I'm Alicia. This is Georgia.

-Nice to see you guys.

-And you are...5ft 2?

-Yeah, I think so.

-Let me have you walk for me. Let's do 12-14. She looks really youthful.

-Yeah.

Very good.

She's got a really cute look. What we need to do is be able to get together

and talk about the issues with her moving here, with her signing with the agency.

-Good news! Happy?

-Yeah.

-(It's embarrassing.)

-Why?

-Walking.

-Why is it embarrassing?

-You've got to be more comfortable. It's all in your head.

-Mm-hm.

-Are you happy?

-Yeah. Can you stop doing that, please?

-She's never happy.

-I am! I said I was happy!

-You're not happy, are you?

-I am!

-You can't tell me what I'm feeling. You're annoying me. You keep...

-I'd be like, "Wicked! Woo!"

Yeah, I'm happy! I am. I don't have to be over-exaggerating, like, "Woo!"

I'm fine.

Over the next few days, Alicia focuses all her efforts on finding the right surgeon

for the repair job on her breast.

Teardrop shapes are more expensive. "Big implants cause drooping over time."

I wondered if he was around today or tomorrow so I could just pop in and see if he could flip it.

Oh, I had them done like... a year and a half ago.

No, no, they're not new. Could it have been the aeroplane that's done this?

Obviously I can't do some things that I'd like to do, like go to the beach.

She doesn't want to wear a bikini or go swimming.

MUFFLED How would you like it if you had a tit like that and a tit like that?

We waited here the last time, when she was having her appointment, for the whole morning.

Now we're waiting again.

-Is this the first time you've been affected by your mum's plastic surgery?

-No.

It's not the first time. A lot of the time if we go to America,

that's where all the plastic surgeons are and she usually gets something done.

Unable to ignore the potential profits in her plastic surgery disasters,

Alicia's invited a British tabloid to cover the story.

Literally massive like that. Red and veins popping out.

Basically, the implant had burst, so I've had that problem before,

but this time it has moved and caused internal bleeding.

You can't see it, can you?

It's there now.

This morning when I spoke to you, ten minutes ago it was at the side.

You can see when you have your arms back like this, you can see on the side that it's moved.

-Can you?

-Yeah.

-Ever so slightly.

Because of the complications Alicia's had in the past,

most surgeons are reluctant to work on her, but a detached implant is dangerous and needs to be fixed.

She'll see if she can get me in. She said they've got nothing, so I might have to stay longer.

We might be stuck here longer than we thought, due to Mummy's tits.

-You'll get worried about missing two weeks of school.

-Yeah.

We're going into GCSEs and I have got quite a lot of lessons in those two weeks.

It's important for me to go to them. When I go back and I have to catch up on so much,

it'll seem like overload.

But it's two weeks off school.

-You'll miss two weeks.

-That's quite a lot.

I have six lessons a day and they're fully packed with stuff.

Two weeks. And then the week that I get back,

it'll be schoolwork plus homework, plus the last two weeks,

-plus the last two weeks' catching up work.

-What I'm saying is take home tutoring in nice, sunny LA,

I recover with my boobs and we stay here for, like, it could be up to a month.

A month?

We're here for a week, another week for the operation and one to recover.

-It could be three weeks.

-OK.

-But obviously you only need two weeks of home tutoring.

Yeah.

-I'll buy you new clothes.

-I don't care if you buy me new clothes.

-Or you can get on a plane by yourself?

-No, I'll stay.

Hopefully people will feel sorry for you because of who your mum is.

-People think it must be awful living with a mum like that.

-If they say that, "You don't live with her,

-"so maybe you can't judge."

-Yeah. Thank you.

Every single day, my reputation affects Georgia.

People judge Georgia on my reputation. Of course they do.

They think Georgie is going to be like what my perceived... um, persona is.

And people are shocked because she is the complete opposite to me.

She'll probably find it a struggle all through her life because she'll be tarnished with her mother's name.

Being my daughter, she's tarnished.

And the rest of your life, you'll have to work harder and prove yourself more

-just because you're my daughter.

-Mm-hm.

-That's what'll happen.

-I'm phoning for my tits now.

-OK.

As the day goes on, discussions about Georgia's future continue.

You've got to go out and prove what a lovely person you are and a talented actress and prove everyone wrong.

Everyone's pointing the finger at me. If anyone says it, just deny it. Say, "That's not my mum."

-Why would I do that?

-I'm giving you permission.

-I'll just say, "That's your own opinion."

-I'm giving you permission.

-They won't affect me. I don't care.

-But just deny it.

-Why? I'm not going to be ashamed of who you are.

Awww.

Cos you're funny, you're kind,

but you're...

What's the word?

-Beautiful?

-Yeah...

Determined and caring.

-A sandwich short of a picnic?

-Yep.

Em...

Like, you do what's best for me. You...

-Do you wish you had another mum?

-No!

One that didn't have to do boob jobs when they turn upside down?

No, I mean, it would be nice if you didn't,

-but I wouldn't want to swap you.

-Would you not?

-No.

As well as visiting surgeons, Alicia's made an appointment with her LA therapist.

She receives ongoing counselling for problems from her childhood trauma.

Today she's taking Georgia with her.

She doesn't get excited.

-Even if something good happens, she doesn't get excited.

-My excitement is different to yours.

-Exactly. Say that again.

-My excitement is different to yours.

You might feel like jumping up and down, screaming. I'm just happy in myself.

-I don't know.

-You two are very different.

You're wanting her maybe to be like you.

And you're wanting to be yourself and maybe not like your mom.

But you're passionate and your daughter is more reticent.

-Then why does she want to be an actress?

-Ask her that.

-Why?

-Cos I enjoy it.

-Why do you enjoy it if you're the opposite to me?

I don't have to feel the same to enjoy the same things.

What do you want for your daughter? Let's talk about the physical.

I'd like her obviously to let me know when she's not happy.

I brought her up like my sister, so I don't have boundaries about what not to say in front of her

-or you know... Sometimes I'd like her to say, "No, don't do that."

-I do say that.

-No, you don't.

-I do.

There's certain things in the relationship that you want to look at and change.

You do want to be the mom. And she's not your sister.

-So you want to look at...

-But she's my sister sometimes. And we're friends sometimes.

-It's easier that way.

-For whom?

We get on all the time. When you're a mum, you're in battle with them, but we get on like Siamese twins.

-I know and that's lovely. Whether you get along as Siamese twins...

-It's unique.

But you are still the mom whether you are friends, twins...

Look at the ways you can take care of her. What do you need from her?

Just... Maybe to listen more.

-To be honest, I did try. I got her into...

-Hold on.

What happens is she says something and you go into your own thing. It's like you didn't hear her.

You have to slow down and get in touch with her.

She's very in touch with you. Your daughter is so attuned to you.

Exquisitely attuned to you and making sure everything is OK in your world. That's what she does.

And you can try that with her, too.

Hmm.

I think you two have a really wonderful relationship.

You're going to speak up more. You know, you can say to your mom, "Mom, be quiet and listen."

Do you think you can do that? You can do that.

She'll still love you.

And you want to meet her where she is and not try to change her into who you want her to be.

Four days into their supposed half-term holiday, the stress is starting to take its toll.

-I can do that at home!

-You tell me what a good thing to do is!

-I don't know.

We can't do anything because we have to go to your thing soon.

-You tell me what a good thing to do is.

-I don't know. I don't know.

-What's a good thing to do?

I don't know.

-Why don't you want to go on a boat?

-It's boring.

-How is it boring going on a boat?!

-It's not interesting.

-Why?

-It isn't interesting to me.

-You're in a bad mood today.

-I'm not.

-Your hormones are all over the place.

-You're having a go at me!

-I'm not.

-You are!

-I'm telling you...

-You're shouting!

-You have to do productive things.

-I'm coming and sitting in a waiting room watching your whatever.

Yeah, but in-between that you can do productive things. Get your hair dyed.

-That's not productive!

-It is. It's towards your modelling and acting.

-You can get your hair dyed blonde.

-It's up to you, isn't it?

After a week of searching, the only surgeon prepared to attempt repairing Alicia's breast

is 2,000 miles away in Nashville, Tennessee.

SOUTHERN DRAWL: I'm going to Nashville to have me some new boobs.

I'm a-gonna get me some new boobs

and maybe get me a new face cos everybody keeps calling me a mess and I don't like it.

And as my boobs exploded... Oh, I'm Australian now.

'The bad thing is that I will miss school.'

I'll have to catch up on a lot of work and things there.

That's going to be hard to do.

We've been to the pharmacy

and we got drugs... Mama got some drugs!

Mama got some antibiotics.

And Mama got some Scrabble, so we're all fine.

-Tomorrow I'm going to have my tits stitched up again.

-OK.

What are you going to do after the operation?

Well, I won't be in any sane state because I'll be on painkillers.

I'll just read a book.

-You'll be asleep.

-I won't be asleep, will I?

-You usually are.

Usually! Like you're an expert. "Usually are.

"This is how it usually goes..."

Hopefully, this will be the last one. You won't have to endure any more.

# Help

# I have done it again

# I have been here many times befo-o-ore

# Hurt myself again today... #

With no access to home tutors in this part of the country, Georgia tries to do her schoolwork alone.

I'm doing trigonometry that my teacher sent me by email,

but I've never done it before so I can't do any of it because I don't know what it is

because we haven't done it in class.

So I can't really learn something if you just give me a piece of paper and say, "Do this question."

You haven't taught it to me.

-Is it a bit frustrating?

-It's annoying because I don't have my books or anything,

but it's just pointless, really. I'm not going to learn anything if I don't know how to do it.

Luckily, the surgery is quick and Alicia is in and out in just three hours.

'They want me to stay in Nashville longer'

because if I fly with my drains, it might cause more problems.

What's happened is when I was on the aeroplane, it expanded the pocket

which made the implant turn, which has caused the problem.

If I fly, it might cause the same problem.

-How did your homework go?

-She sent it to me, but I don't know what to do because I don't know...

-You don't know what to do?

-No. It didn't tell me how to do any of it.

Well, we have hit a problem, haven't we? She can't do her Maths.

-You can concentrate on History and all that.

-I don't do History at school.

-You don't do History?

-No!

-You don't do Geography?

-No, I told you before the subjects that I do.

-What do you do, then?

-I do Music, Drama, Art, three Sciences,

English, Maths and Religious Studies.

So Drama... OK, then?

I want you to write a play that me and you perform.

Georgie, don't start moaning. At the end of the day, you're supposed to be at school.

No, I prefer school if I have to do that kind of work.

-I don't have any paper.

-Maths will have to be put on hold until we work out Trickolokogy.

-Trigonometry.

-Yeah, that.

The surgeon has left Alicia with DIY nursing instructions

and she's asked Georgia to help.

Can you undo one of those, Nurse Georgia?

-Yeah, it's about 25.

-25?

Jesus. I'm draining a lot of blood.

The bandages are coming off! The bandage has just come off!

Oh, no! I don't need this.

Don't...fiddle with it.

Darling, I have to fiddle with it to try to mend it myself. Is there bandages in that thing?

In your bag? No.

-Can you help me get my jumper off, please? I need to investigate so I can mend this

-BLEEP.

-It's all

-BLEEP

-... Aaaah. I can't lift my arm up.

Do it this side, please.

OK, you need to take it off, yeah?

Now, shh. There now.

It's not in the middle.

-It will be. You've just got to wait for it to...

-It's not though, is it, Georgie?

I'm worried it's gone wrong in the middle. The implants are like that.

And there's no bandages to separate them. I've done it with my scarf.

The implants are too close together!

-What do you think, Georgia?

-I think she's overreacting.

-I'm not overreacting!

-OK, well, just calm down.

-How would you like it if someone gave you one boob?

-I wouldn't, but I wouldn't start moaning.

Seven letters.

Georgie, can you pass me my handbag?

Do plastic surgeons never see tits?

-Do you think that's what it is?

-No!

Every time I have a boob job, one's over there, one's up there.

Or they're meeting in the middle,

like Eiffel Towers across like that. These look like missile launchers!

They look ridiculous!

Mm.

-OK, do you want to start?

-OK.

It's much more painful, much more painful.

The bandages are all coming off.

-That's a lot of blood.

-But that's because it was the whole night.

I'm like a patchwork quilt. Stitched up everywhere.

That's where the drain's coming out.

I'm like an old woman, sitting here with my bandages and my knitting.

-You all right, Georgia?

-Yeah.

-It wasn't quite the holiday we thought it would be, is it?

-No.

You expected to be eating out in Nobu, but you're watching your mum get bandaged up

-and playing Suko in bed.

-It's OK.

-You said you don't want a boob job now. It's putting you off.

-Yeah.

-But Georgie probably will have a boob job one day.

-I don't think so.

-Why?

-Cos I don't... I don't want one.

-Why?

Because of all the blood and all the pain you go through and all the stitching and everything.

But what if you didn't have all that? That's reconstruction.

You still have to get cut open either way.

-You don't want to get cut open?

-No. It's not attractive, is it? It's not nice.

-Not attractive?

It's not worth it.

As soon as we get back to LA, I'll get you a home tutor, acting classes, get home tutoring going.

Mm-hm.

After five days in Nashville, Alicia and Georgia have flown back to the West Coast,

where Alicia can continue her recovery and Georgia can finally get some schooling.

"..not without ambition, but without the illness should attend it."

She's saying it because she wants what he doesn't want.

-Mm-hm.

-She's more ambitious than he.

You know when she would rather be dead and killed like Duncan was

than to be what she is now, a killer, because she goes crazy of the blood and everything.

The therapist's advice and the experiences of the last few weeks

have made Alicia more aware than ever of their differences.

Georgia's supposed to be this gorgeous next top model...

and all she wants to do is go in there and study Biology and Macbeth.

She's the squarest person I know.

She's not my daughter. Someone's replaced her.

She came from my womb! How can she be that different?

She speaks like another language to me. She speaks about atoms

and measurements and stuff.

She doesn't want to leave the table when it comes to Biology,

but when it comes to doing a photo shoot, I have to drag her.

Does it make you feel alienated from her?

It's not alienated, but she's not the little girl that I knew.

My little girl likes bikinis and photo shoots and...

..you know, wants to be onstage singing and acting and wants to be the next Britney Spears.

# How far we've gone

# How far we're going... #

'I've just done a lot of thinking and it's really sad because I look back at all my friends'

that are glamour models - one's lap-dancing in a seedy club,

one's going to prison...

'..some of them are now escorting or they're drinking.

'And it's just made me realise...'

..signing up to be a glamour model seems to be, nine times out of ten,

a really bad idea.

It's been six weeks since they came back from America

and Georgia is home from school for the weekend.

I'll make one of Mum's special smoothies for you.

My special recipe.

Alicia wants to have a chat about how her new thinking has affected her ambitions for Georgia.

Come on then, Versace. Come and have a picnic.

I think you'd be selling yourself short if you did topless modelling.

-You're much better than that. You don't have to sell out.

-Mm-hm.

You don't need to dye your hair or have silicone put in because you're perfect as you are.

Everything's good as it is.

'It is difficult letting her grow up'

but your role as a parent, I think,

is to let them grow up

and let them... move forward and go on.

In my future, I want to finish my education to university level, become a serious actress.

'I don't want to be a glamour model.'

If you want to go to university, I'd be happy for you to go.

From where I've come from, where I started...

..I've got you where you need to be, I hope.

'I've learnt that my mum'

has had a difficult life, but she's tried not to pass her mistakes on to me

and that's what makes her a perfect mum, for me.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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