Episode 6 Watermen: A Dirty Business

Getting clean water can be a dirty business...

What not to flush, eh!

Mmm.

..for the people who run one of Britain's biggest water companies.

Oh, look, she's going over there! Aah!

They cover over 5,000 square miles...

..and three million homes.

I'll just open t'gate for you.

We follow them through one of the hottest summers on record...

'I've calmed down and I've counted to ten.'

Although the sun's shining, unfortunately,

we've still got shit flooding everywhere.

Are we pulling it this way, or are we going that way with it?

But keeping the networks flowing depends on teamwork.

Want your helmet, sweet-cheeks?

Cheers, love. Yeah, that's it. You work the magic, son.

Yeah, we just saw each other and just fell in love!

You don't have to do paper, scissors and stones - he's straight in there.

Come on in. It's lovely.

No smell's too strong...

It's the smell, innit?

I can't smell it, me.

..or job too dirty...

Someone's shat a helmet!

Probably been in every dirty hole that you can think of.

He's living the dream.

..for the water men.

Looks like we're going to get wet.

-See you in t'morning, Wes.

-Yeah, see you in t'morning, mate.

Just another day in the office!

Lennox Gate Pumping Station in Blackpool.

Watch yourself.

For over 100 years, it's been carrying waste from low-level

housing to the main sewers.

This station takes, like, a lot of Blackpool sewage.

If this goes wrong, say any assets end up failing,

it will end up flooding further back and flooding properties

and land, so we need to be on it.

Beautiful. Like a new one.

In charge of maintenance, Chris and Mark.

This is just a part-time job, what we do.

In our real life, we're actually fighter pilots.

Shite-r pilots. That's us.

Today, they need to fit a new pump essential to keeping

the works flowing.

Look at that, that's beautiful, isn't it?

You think, "I don't really want to put it in the sewage," you know,

because it's nice and shiny.

-Do you want to go forward a bit?

-Yeah.

-That'll do. Keep it there.

The old one has been destroyed by sewage debris.

Go on. Keep going.

That's just, that's just on the chains, wrapped round the rags.

A certain amount of rags - the pumps can't handle them.

You ready, mate?

Obviously, it causes the pumps to block.

Blows a fuse in the pump and, eh, can cause some big problems really.

I tell you, it's just people flushing all sorts - towels.

-There's been towels, hasn't there? Towels.

-Towels, jackets.

Every day you get a prize, don't you, something different.

Pair of underpants. Armanis.

Skidded in them at the weekend and that and thought,

"I tell you what, give these lads a job.

"We'll flush 'em down 'toilet."

Give us a hand, mate.

Well done, mate. Pass it all down.

Pull it out of way, mate.

You need two men most of 'time,

so I say the preference is someone else,

but Mark was the only one here.

We came across the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

They do exist.

So we're here with him.

So we could change that wearing, couldn't we?

Let's just get it in.

It's quite an unpleasant job sometimes, innit?

You know, you get a bit mucky and dirty,

so you've got to have a bit of a laugh at work.

Chris and I have been together, like teamed up, for about a year now.

He's saying, "Chris", "Chris and I". He never usually calls me Chris.

Usually "Knobhead" or summat like that, you know what I mean?

-That's it.

-Didn't know you were on about me, mate.

Just trying to be nice, that's all. Just being polite for once.

Beautiful. Beautiful.

You have to trust the people you work with, like,

you know what I mean? So ... knows why I do it with him!

So we're going to have to look after this fat now.

-Ah, we're going to have to. It's a problem, int' it, but...

-Yeah.

At Davyhulme Wastewater Works in Manchester, process controllers

Scott and Wayne have a serious fat problem to deal with.

If you can think of an iceberg, that's what it is.

-And it's the length of this channel.

-A fatberg!

-Yeah, a fatberg.

That's down to industries - like chippies, your chip pans,

your waste - just throwing it down the sewer.

This channel runs down between the screening houses

and the primary treatment tanks.

It's constricting the flow into this part of the works.

We need to get that cleaned out ASAP.

We're going to have to have a think now about how we can get

the fat out and at the same time deal with the odour that will

come with the fat, so it's a bit of a balancing act, if I'm honest.

Nice(!)

That's what the problem is, there.

They've called on a team of DISAB operators to see

if they can remove the fat without removing the covers.

Oh-ho-ho! It might be deeper than we thought.

In this channel here, we've got what we expect to

-be about 100 tonne of fat. It's in...

-Yeah?!

-Yeah!

It's in different depths, so I'm just wondering how you

think the best way to take this fat from this channel is.

You going through these holes 'ere?

Yeah, we've got to try these hatches rather than take the covers off.

If we can start them off from there, start sucking from there,

-we'll get some high water pressure on it, yeah?

-Yeah.

-And see what happens. Take it away.

-Brilliant.

Because she'll take it, like, she'll take it.

-Do you know what I mean?

-Yeah.

This is basically a massive vacuum cleaner,

and it'll just suck the fat off the top of the tank.

We don't actually know how well this'll work.

We've not had a go at it before.

It's never been done on this level, this amount of fat.

A high-pressured jet helps break the fat down.

Obviously no-one can smell the smell we're smelling now,

but it's quite strong, isn't it?

Yeah, you've got the fat, what's broke on there,

what's been sat there.

Once we've started breaking it up, extracting it,

that's when it started giving off the fumes, the gases,

basically, and that's what you can smell at the moment.

-This is the set-up you'd like to see.

-Yeah.

Like this young man over here. This man's expecting trouble, I think.

He knows something we don't know.

It does look a lot deeper than we thought it would be,

to be honest, but we'll have to just keep chipping away,

chipping away, chipping away.

Here's a shot of prehistoric man fishing for food.

Scott and Wayne have a history that goes back 20 years.

I started off as an operator, same as Scott.

-Went to college at the same time, didn't we?

-Yeah.

It was quite funny, cos everyone was like at different companies,

saying, "I'm doing an NVQ in Maths," or something like that.

And we were doing a B.Tech in wastewater!

How much tonne will that hold? 20 tonne?

Ten?

The DISAB's full. Now they need to empty it.

The cost involved with taking the fat out of the tank is £10,000,

but it would then cost an extra £90,000 to remove the fat off-site

and have the fat disposed of by the correct means you're supposed to.

But Mike Scott runs an energy company that will take it

away for free.

We've developed this process to convert fat,

oils and grease from effluent treatment facilities into biodiesel.

I think we're probably the first in the business to take this

type of material and turn it into a high value fuel.

Well, we're suspecting that it's 70% fat on the back of that DISAB,

and about 30% water.

We would need a volume of water, otherwise the fat would just

solidify in there, we wouldn't move it.

And we're actually blowing it from our DISAB to the energy

country's vac tank unit.

Once we're happy that it's been decanted, yeah, what we need to

do is, obviously, you need to be in contact with us immediately.

Then we'll come and arrange to get it collected.

If I loaded that tanker in a day, yeah, let it settle overnight,

decant in the morning, job should be good, shouldn't it?

Yeah. That's right, because the fat off-loads straightaway.

Yeah. Happy with that, yeah.

Well, it is exciting because instead of taking the material

and putting it into landfill, then you've got a real valued use

for it at the end of it that could be used to run their own fleet.

Tea-time!

Hello, Mrs Lee, this is Rachel at United Utilities' wastewater team.

We're running slightly behind schedule.

We haven't forgotten about you,

and we will be with you as soon as possible. Is that all right?

I've just seen that you've just finished on that job.

Have you given Rach your tracker details at all?

-'No, no.'

-No, right.

Gem, I've got another job for Barry Taylor.

No, I understand completely.

I mean, how bad is the severity of the leak coming out there?

Are the problems internal then?

Have they had problems with their toilets and things?

'The drains are smelling.

'So it turns out that it's four manholes that are full of water.'

Right, OK.

It's only if we can get to it,

because there's quite a lot of jobs in the area, you see, so...

Thank you, bye-bye.

At the moment, we're busy with wastewater,

so it's really... Everything is all go.

Although the sun's shining, unfortunately,

we've still got shit flooding everywhere.

Not very good, is it?

-Yeah, fuelled-up. Ready to rock'n'roll, Turry?

-"Turry".

Reacting to calls are wastewater teams like Andy and Terry.

# Everything... # Mate, could you do that job?

No. That'd be so boring. On t'motorway all day.

They've been working together for two years.

# No, I can't have you

-BOTH:

-# I don't want nobody, baby.

-# Well, I can't have you BOTH:

-# Oh-oh-oh!

# Yeah. #

Yeah, we just saw each other and we just fell in love, didn't we?

THEY LAUGH

-Want your helmet, sweet-cheeks?

-Cheers, love.

He's like one of my good mates,

so always a bonus when you work with one of your good mates, isn't it?

C'mon, let's go.

Today, they've been called to a collapsed pipe in Blackpool.

See what Terry likes to do?

He likes to trap himself inside the tiniest gaps,

so you can't even get into it.

Let's have a look down here. I think it might be blocked, bruv.

Oh, you can smell that a la de urine...

I think we work together well.

-Work it, baby.

-Yeah. That's it. You work your magic, son.

We keep the same rate, we're the same pace.

He knows where everything is on the wagon,

-I know where everything is and....

-We just click, once we're on site.

-Yeah, that's it.

-Boom-shak - in one!

I think we found a dead dog!

Do you think they use baby wipes(?)

There's got to be half a tonne of baby wipes there. Watch out!

The best bit is coming into work or waiting for a Thursday

and the new rota comes out.

And then you see it, like, you realise,

"Oh, yeah, I've got Terry all week."

One second, I'll close this and make it safe.

And that's the best bit about it because you know you're

with each other and you're, like, you're prepping yourself.

Yes! Get the CDs ready, get the van ready,

-because I'm with Terry.

-Because he's my baby-cakes.

Don't be like that, mate. People will see this on telly.

This is for personal.

Vertically challenged.

Now, after two years as a waterman,

Andy's decided it's time for a change.

Right, shall we just tidy some of this hose up?

Yeah. I'd rather he stayed, so I could work with him, but...

It is what it is. It's like a piece of pie.

If you like it, try and keep hold of it and get that same pie,

but when t'pie changes, you don't want to get rid of it.

It's a crap flavour.

HE LAUGHS

Skip!

Asset manager Joe Jazmik

has worked at the company for over 42 years

and has been involved in many of its most ambitious projects.

Most recently, my highlight's been the Haweswater Aqueduct outage,

which was in the planning for many, many years.

I remember starting it off probably 12 or 13 years ago,

and it's been a challenge and, to be honest, a successful one.

He's responsible for maintaining pipe work carrying water

to 80% of the company's customers.

This is one of my jobs. We're at Rivington Aqueduct,

and we're doing a cleaning programme from Monterey down into Prescot.

We've got over 46,000 kilometres of pipes in the company,

so what happens? Materials build up over time

and that discharges into our customers' taps.

And what we're trying to do is reduce that event frequency.

So when's pig going in?

Well, they're here now.

As soon as they come back to give us the go-ahead

because they've got to put some sensor in front of it.

We're cleaning it using the piggy method, which is

inserting a big swab, in other words, into the main

and using the force of the water to push it through the pipe

and it discharges the discoloured water over at Prescot.

And we'll do that up to six times, and hopefully by the end

of that time we'll have nice clean water coming out at the other end.

It's smaller than the pipe, isn't it, just?

So, it's like a proving pig.

Well, here are the pigs, as we call them.

They're actually a polyurethane coating.

As you can see, quite a tough coating.

And this gets flushed down and pushed into the pipe

and the pressure then takes the pig along,

pulls all the material off the sides and then,

as it flushes out with the water, it comes out at the other end.

They said when it comes out at other end,

it don't come out with extreme pressure, it'll just...

-Plop out.

-Plop.

-Yeah.

-And then a rush of air.

My background is engineering,

and I've always liked getting my hands dirty.

I enjoy big pipes.

You know, when you get to see a pipe like that one in there,

I don't know, it gets those juices flowing, doesn't it?

It gets that interest going as well.

Take it up a little bit.

Which is great. You know, it's the best job ever.

But this is one job Joe won't see through to the end.

I won't see any of the cleaning physically finish

because I'll be retiring in a few months' time.

It's a big step.

It's something that I will, I will miss,

but a lot of the projects, the meaty projects, are coming to an end,

so I thought, well, it's a good time to go.

At Heaton Park Reservoir, water business analyst Andy

is overseeing his first big job.

It's like a nice little Christmas present, this, because it was

ordered, we actually placed the order for it just before Christmas.

It's a bit late.

You know, when you get Christmas presents, you normally

want them on Christmas Day, but I'll make do with getting it now.

He's here to see the installation of a new reservoir mixer.

It's been shipped from Australia to solve an algae problem.

Do you know what? It is actually quite exciting to see it.

I'm actually... That's why I've got this big smile on my face.

And I can't wipe the smile off.

Riddled with algae, the reservoir

and nearby treatment works have been out of action for two years.

One of the problems with algae is that it gives off taste

and odour compounds and it smells.

And there was so much algae in this reservoir, it stunk.

I mean, really reeked. Ugh!

I had to walk away at one point because it smelt so bad.

Algae sits at the top of the water, needing oxygen and light to survive.

-Am I allowed to go up and touch it?

-Yeah, sure.

I know it sounds a bit weird, but it's one of those things.

When you get something new, you just want to go and have a little touch.

The reservoir mixer works by moving the oxygen-rich water

at the surface down towards the bottom...

..meaning that conditions for algae are not suitable.

Good.

The mixer itself, basically, the way I describe it to someone

is it literally is a way of just putting your hand

in the reservoir and just stirring it up.

And it is only very slow moving, it's not a fast moving thing.

It's not going to whizz it up. It's not a blender.

Costing half a million pounds, it's the first time a reservoir

mixer has ever been used in the UK to treat algae.

Personally, for me, this project is great because I've only been

in my role now about three years and before that I worked in finance,

I worked behind a desk in accounts, you know, crunching the numbers.

And now, here I am out on site,

having one of my first major capital projects that I've

kind of seen right from the start being delivered.

Think I get a bit over-excited about this cos it's like my first

and it's only a little one but it's like, it's like my baby.

A helicopter will lift the mixer into the reservoir.

We'll position it down here. The lorry will then back away.

And then the helicopter will come and land in that space over there.

I need to see if I can get a lift in the helicopter.

That's what I was trying to say -

-"Is it going to come back and land again?"

-Certainly not.

If you need somebody to go up, I'll take one for the team, you know?

The helicopter's now come in and landed.

They're going to hook up the resmix to it.

Once it's hooked up, it will then lift it over this embankment

to around the middle of the reservoir here.

It will be anchored into place.

This is the exciting bit now.

I think he might've forgotten the unit. Ha-ha! Over here!

Oh, he's coming back. Oh, he's coming back round.

That's brilliant to see. At least he's remembered it this time.

I got a sudden panic then that he'd forgotten it, or they'd had

to cancel and call it off - "Oh, no, we'll do it another day."

With the mixer in place, divers hook it up ready to be switched on.

He is coming back! I could have had a go in it.

Andy will be back in four weeks to see if it's working.

Could have lost a bit of weight, couldn't he? To be honest.

Letting the side down, really. LAUGHTER

His, his bum does look slightly big in it.

At the pumping station...

Frogs holding on for dear life. Frogs!

..one of the screens protecting the pumps needs cleaning.

Main comes in, sewer comes in

and, erm, these screens catch quite a lot of the rags

but, obviously, stuff still comes through.

If we don't clean it off, it just ends up backing up this side

and the station'll think there's nothing in

but it'll be full this side, if you know what I mean.

Chris, do you want to get in, mate?

-Right, are we ready?

-Yeah.

-Right.

-Watch yourself.

Chris will have to go right down into the sewage tank

to clean it by hand.

Beautiful, beautiful.

When I first started, it got a smell and you thought, "What am I doing?"

The next thing, your guts are up the wall for about a week.

Then, you're right. Now, you don't even think it's shit.

We don't have to do paper, scissors and stones.

-He's straight in there.

-Come on in, it's lovely(!)

Like I said, he's like a pig in shit, is Chris.

-Do you want to lower a bucket down?

-Right, hold on.

Thanks, mate.

Chris's got what they call turtle-skin gloves on.

What not to flush, eh?

You're blind, basically.

You don't know what you're going to put your hands into.

Could be all sorts.

It's stuff like this.

If there's any needles or anything, it doesn't go through.

He's living the dream. Someone's got to do it...

Someone's shat a helmet.

You have your tetanus, all your jabs and that, you know, for this job.

Will you take that up, mate?

You're bound to build up a good immune system

because we are coming into contact with a lot of waste.

This is, like, what we're up against day to day - sanitary towels,

baby wipes. They're not disposable, you know.

And this is what's causing us huge problems.

I can't remember this at the recruitment centre. Ha-ha!

I'll get him up now, I think he's had enough.

Yeah, spot on. Spot on.

As spot on as it can be, like. You know what I mean?

It's like trout fishing.

Brown trout, obviously, but, eh, yeah.

You have t'be crackers, don't you? You know what I mean?

To do this.

It does look a bit like one of those James Bond torpedoes

from maybe Thunderball or something like that, you know, I'm kind

of expecting some sort of gun to come out or anything like that, no?

No guns? No, OK. Never mind.

It's been four weeks, and Andy's back with an EcoMapper to see

if the reservoir mixer is working.

Hopefully it will swim round and it will be telling us

the live data coming from the reservoir about the various

different water quality parameters that we're looking for.

In particular, we obviously want to know where the algae is

because the algae's been the issue.

Hopefully, it will tell us where the pockets are

and that it's dying off.

-Do you want to take a look at this, Andy?

-Yeah.

This is the remote desktop into the actual EcoMapper.

It has a compass heading here to show you which direction you're in.

-Right.

-And this is how you actually drive it.

So you don't get like a PS3 controller or an Xbox

-controller that you can...

-Unfortunately, no! Ha-ha. I wish!

..push a button on it?

Hopefully, if you go forwards and backwards,

-you'll see down there that the motor is actually moving.

-Oh, yeah.

Yeah, remote-controlled cars when you're young is one thing

but getting to have a go at remotely-controlling a torpedo

is something I've never had the opportunity to have and probably

won't get a chance to do again, so jump at it while I can, really.

Eco-survey operators Lisa and Neil

will send the EcoMapper on a programmed course.

It'll gather a continuous stream of data from its ten water

quality sensors.

What I'm quite pleased about already is that the reservoir

is already looking clearer.

When I was last here it still had a little bit of a greenish tint

to it, so I'm really pleased, actually, now.

It's a good sign so far.

If you just click on that circle, you can move it forwards,

backwards, left and right.

-You can see...

-Oh, it's moving!

-The EcoMapper starts to move off.

It's quite quick, actually.

-When I hit go, like, put the speed up, it took off!

-Yeah, yeah.

And then I realised it was heading towards the embankment

and I was like, "Stop!" THEY LAUGH

I don't want to break a £200,000 unit,

so I'm going to give it back to you now. I've had a quick go.

It's found its first point, which is just here.

And then it should head across in front of us and back up that way.

It's just dived now, yeah. I can see it going down.

If we did a standard sampling on the reservoir,

you'd get a spot location - what the water's like at that point.

What we want to know is what's the water's like throughout

the whole of the reservoir

because, putting the resmix in, the aim of the project was to

ensure consistent water quality throughout the whole of the res.

Hopefully, this will give us that, the overall image.

When the water was analysed,

the algae had decreased by almost 99%.

Since starting at the company,

there is one person's advice that Andy has always sought.

-I'll really miss you.

-For at least 20 minutes!

I've actually learnt so much from just sitting here and asking him

constant questions every time something comes up on my e-mail.

It's literally like having...

I call him the Google of Asset Management, so just ask Joe.

But now Joe's last day at the company is almost here.

I'm going to miss him. I'll definitely be on the phone to you.

-I know that now.

-That's all right. I'll answer it.

I can't, you know, I can't help it sometimes.

You need that quick question, sorry,

that quick answer that you just seem to have off the top of your head.

It's going to take me time to get that kind of knowledge.

And all of us, it'll take time to get that kind of knowledge.

That knowledge is here. The trouble is just getting to it.

And people take a short cut by asking me.

It won't be the same not having you there, though.

We'll definitely miss you.

You've been here ever since I've come to this team

-and you've been the most helpful, friendly...

-I've been here for ever.

But you're definitely, definitely irreplaceable.

Thank you, Andrew.

Nobody's indispensible. Nobody is, you know. Drop dead tomorrow.

What would happen? This is... Water'd still come out the taps.

You'll keep yourself busy, I'm sure.

Mark's just buying a house up in Edgerton, so I'm going to end

up doing a lot of work on that, decorating and stuff like that.

-You going to be a DIY man?

-I enjoy my DIY.

Yeah. Joe the Handyman.

Andy's not the only one who'll miss Joe.

It's going to be a big wrench, I think,

for us all at the end of the day. I mean, Joe's been, you know,

a wingman through my current role every minute of the day,

you know, he's so reliable.

I can pick the phone up. He's no trouble.

I know things are being sorted, so that's going to be a big change

for me but I think the biggest change will be for Joe himself.

I've resigned myself to the fact that I'm definitely going, you know.

I've got to, really. Job application closes tomorrow

for my replacement, so, eh, yeah,

I don't think there's any turning back after that, I think!

But, I wouldn't anyway.

No, I'm, I'm beginning to look forward to it, in a funny

sort of way, to be honest, but eh, erm, I'll have other things to do.

Won't take long now.

Yeah. Won't take long now!

Only got another eight hours of daylight.

HE CHUCKLES

It's been a week since Wayne

and Scott first began tackling the fatberg.

Fatbergs that are in here now are like bigger than

we could have envisaged.

Unfortunately, now we've gone as far as we can go with the hatches.

What we're hoping to do is take two covers off.

Are we pulling it this way, or are we going that way with it?

-I'd pull it that way.

-That's it.

I can't believe it. How far does it go? Yeah, that's it.

All right there.

It's wall-to-wall, and it's as far as the eye can see.

I could imagine you could actually walk across there,

cos it's that thick and that deep, that fat.

It's just congealed as one massive big mass across.

And if it looks like this here, and it's not moving anywhere,

this fat must be all the way to the end of this channel, which is

50 to 80m long.

You can't even see a flow down here now.

That's how bad this is.

Now, the real scale of the problem is hitting home.

At the moment, we're looking at chunks of about two foot deep,

like, you know, so... Once we broke the key out of it and we get

it moving, we should be able to get it going down one end and get at it.

It gets worse than this.

I mean, I've been down some of the dirtiest holes you could ever

think, from Penrith down to Stoke, you know what I mean?

Probably been down every dirty hole you can think of,

that you can throw at us, like, you know?

-With this?

-Yeah.

Get it dancing, get it moving, like.

It's like a nice, steady, easy job, to be honest with you.

But I love me job. By rights, I shouldn't.

There's no natural reason why I should like playing in crap

all day, but I do, I love it.

Break that key up.

Put it this way - if we didn't have our partners now, I think

it would be hard work getting girlfriends doing this job.

So, were you already working here when you met your Mrs, Scott?

-Yeah, yeah.

-Did you tell her straight off you were working here?

Well, I told her I was an engineer, cos of a fashion I am!

Or a technician!

She didn't realise it was a turd technician though.

He's full.

The stuff we do to earn a living.

Disconnection team Caroline and Ian

are on their way to cut the water supply at a fried chicken shop.

The last time they paid any money was May 2008,

so there's been phone calls in the past, erm, the standard bills,

reminders, erm, letters to advise that we're going to disconnect.

They've not responded to anything. They owe just over £5,300,

which is quite a bit of money for a small premises.

Hello?

-Hiya.

-Is your manager about, please?

-The manager or the owner?

No.

Right. We're here to cut the supply of water off.

-He's coming now.

-He's coming now, is he?

OK, thank you.

We always hope there won't be any trouble

and that they'll work with us, um, but you never, you never know.

-Sorry, what's his name?

-Al.

Hello, is that Al? We're here to disconnect the water supply.

How long have you been at the property for?

OK, so you're a new leaseholder.

What's the reason you've not let United Utilities know that

you've taken over the water?

So, where we're at at the moment, sir,

is we're going to have to start disconnecting the property.

Anything that you've got that's legal documentation to show

that you've taken it over in the past few weeks,

if you can get those documents to me then we can stop or undo

the disconnection, but I need those documents.

That's fine. Right, yeah.

Thank you. Bye.

Because the water's off, yeah, you're not allowed to trade.

We'll have to let Environmental Health know.

Yeah, if you can just shut the shop and then we'll start disconnecting.

As the team disconnect the water supply,

the camera crew are asked to leave the premises.

One of the guys has made us aware that once this disconnection's done,

just to let you know we're going to open again.

The concern is there that they are handling chicken, and it's

exceptionally dangerous, so as ever we'll let Environmental Health know,

and let them know that they've opened up and started trading again.

-So...

-To be honest, that's probably in keeping

-because there's no hygiene sticker on the wall.

-No.

We've not got enforcement authority to shut them down per se.

That would be Environmental Health, so it'll be over to them

to just update them on what's happened and what we've advised

and what we've observed. There's people in there now ordering food.

It's disgusting.

Eventually, the leaseholder paid a recalculated bill

based on his time at the property.

It was £627.

Hello? Hello? Hello, can you hear me?

-'The main blockage...'

-Yeah.

-'I've got a rat infestation.'

Right, OK. Oh, dear.

'And what it is, we had no water yesterday.'

-Yeah, yeah.

-What's your name, please?

'Shush, I'm on the phone, kids.'

I've got one in Stockport and then I've got a few in Manchester,

so we'll try and keep you round the same area, all right?

Rachel's been distributing jobs to the teams

out in the field for over eight years.

All right, cheers, babe, bye.

But today she's going out on a job.

Today, I'm going to go out with the boys.

I'm going to go over in a bit to meet Adam and Mick Barton,

and I'm going to go do a day in the life of them.

Yeah, she's lucky to be with two very fine men like me

and Adam today.

It's development really, for ourselves.

I think it's important you go out

and see what they do in the field, so you know what you're on about.

I've spoken to Rachael for years on the phone.

When I've gone, "Rachael, I've got this - I'm going to be ages."

-HE MIMICS:

-"No problem, love." Love it.

Right, see you all later. I want nice jobs, Ton, nice jobs.

Nice jobs.

-No matter what time you call her, she's always in a good mood.

-She's always friendly.

Yeah, she's always helpful.

No, I'm all right. I'm quite excited, to be honest with you.

I've even put on me mascara, which I don't think I should've done,

because if, if I'm 'eughing', I'm going to be all panda eyes.

That isn't going to look very good, is it?

Jesus. I'll be all right. I'll be all right.

I'm all for it.

I can't wait to be sandwiched with the boys.

SHE LAUGHS

-You all right?

-Hiya. You all right?

Yeah, not too bad. Am I going in the middle?

-Eh, erm...

-Or on the end?

I think you'll go on the end. There you go.

Oh, this is cosy, innit?

Oh, what you doing? Stay in your lane.

-C'mon. No, no, no.

-Oh, she's going over there!

Oh! Oh, my God!

And she nearly had a crash.

The team are called to a job in Manchester's Newton Heath.

So, we're at the job. We've got a blockage.

We've got some flooding in the rear garden.

Mick's just doing a risk assessment,

just to make sure it's safe - obviously.

Adam's just gone to have a little look to see whether it is

flooding and then we'll go and have a little look, I presume.

We're going to go out to play.

This is going to be messy. Ho ho!

Oh, God!

Is it bad? Oh...

I wish they'd never called for me now, to be honest with you.

Ha! Now I'm here.

It's not the - ugh...

Ugh, it's the smell, innit?

It's the smell! It's the smell.

Don't know - like dried fat, off fat, I don't know.

It's not good though.

There's a manhole next door but, unfortunately,

as the customer's not in next door and we've haven't got permission

to access the property, there's not much we can do other than try

and clear it from here, which would make a lot more mess, if we can't.

So we'll do as best as we can by them to try and get it sorted.

You expect something dead easy and obviously, erm,

we can't do what we need to be doing because we can't gain access.

So we're going to play it by ear.

I think it's going to be a bit of a tricky job, to be honest with you.

That smell is not good.

I think it's going to get worse, you know, as they're jetting it.

Really bad.

Important day.

We're looking for an assessment of the candidates that are going

to replace Joe, which is an absolutely impossible task.

-It's...

-Oh, I wouldn't say that at all.

There are many, many good candidates.

We're, we're quite a small little team of anoraks really that

love our pipes.

Now, so, I want to see a bit of passion out of somebody,

that that's what they want.

And it's our job to tease out

whether they're actually pretending or it's actually in the blood.

So the first thing we do is do a blood test to see

if they've got aqueduct water in their veins.

HE LAUGHS

-If they haven't...

-Is it true blue?

-Yeah.

I can't think of very many people that've actually

interviewed for their own position.

Erm, but, yeah, it is quite odd in a way.

It's going to be a big ask

and big shoes to fill for whoever is successful in it.

-Daniel?

-Yeah.

Good to see you. C'mon. We're through here.

-Cheers.

-OK. Come on in.

How you doing?

Hiya, Joe. You OK?

Five internal candidates are being interviewed for the role.

Good to see you again.

One of them is Andy Bent.

Definitely feeling quite nervous.

The Asset Manager is a role, a job I really want.

It's something that I really want to do.

It's not the first time I've gone for the role.

I've been pipped at the post a couple of times.

I formally welcome you to the interview process.

Do come on through.

Eh, the thing is, all the candidates are great candidates, so it's

very difficult when you're going up against friends and colleagues.

I don't know what kind of character they are looking for to

fit into the team, so it could be any of us.

Just fingers crossed it's me.

Just one more to go, John.

-OK. Last one?

-Last one.

Right. I've got me notes? Yep.

I think John knows what he wants from that person.

I know what I would like from that person

and it's that commitment to the position.

You've got to have that love, that passion for that particular type

of job because it's... It ends up all-consuming, to be honest.

So, Andrew Bent. I'll go and get Andy and bring him in then, yeah?

Do I look good, do I?

-You OK? We all set?

-Yeah. All set.

OK, let's go.

Andrew.

You all right? Nice to see you.

-Andrew, right. Come on through.

-Cheers.

Second door on the right.

On the right?

-Hiya. Nice to see you.

-To see you.

That's the hot seat, Andrew, so if you want to sit in there.

Yeah, brilliant. Cheers.

And we'll, eh, conduct the interview.

Do you want me to hold your hose, Mick?

HE LAUGHS

-Rachael?

-Yeah, baby?

-Could you do me a favour?

-Yeah.

Could you stand on the corner there in a minute

and then you can shout to Ruddy on-off, up-down.

Right. That's off.

Yeah.

Obviously, that's pressure up.

-Yeah. Off, up.

-Yeah, yeah. That's it.

Higher - lower. I got it. I'm on it.

-That's good.

-And this is we've cleared it, Rachael...

Woo-hoo!

SHE LAUGHS

I can do that!

-Right, turn water on, Rach.

-Check.

Turn the water on!

You smell that?

So what happened then this morning? What was your problem?

Erm, it was yesterday. It flooded up yesterday.

And this morning, when we woke up,

it had come through all the drains and up the toilet and everything.

And just near enough flooded the full bathroom.

Yeah. God. You got a little 'un as well?

-Yeah. Well, it's her little 'un. I'm just a baby-sitter.

-Oh, God bless you!

So what is it? Is it everybody...?

Is it just more than one house that is causing this then?

-Yeah. It's a build-up.

-Oh.

Unfortunately, it's all been sat in a manhole and because you're...

Right, so what I want this time, yeah, is at the end o' street we need a Portaloo.

Everybody can go and use that.

So I don't have to wake up smelling this.

-Argh.

-Oh!

SHE LAUGHS

-Is it going?

-Yeah, it's gone. We just need to clear it further down.

It's just with the thickness, it's blocked up further downstream.

We're going to be here for ages yet.

I thought that. Eugh.

SHE COUGHS

Is it...? Is that really getting to you, Rach, yeah?

I can't smell it, me.

It's a tough job, eh?

A real tough job.

I'm normally tucked in me office just having a joke with them down the phone but...

-You can see how hard she's worked, lads?

-Eh?

She's worked hard, hasn't she?

Yeah - grafting.

LAUGHTER

It's your turn to clean mess up.

-I know!

-You're having sweeping brush.

I'm going to have to have the brush. I said that.

After four hours out on the job,

it's time for Rachael to return to the office.

Well, it has been a blast, young men, but I do have to go.

-No, that's all right.

-No problem.

-Go back to my normal place now.

I'm not even going to shake hands with either of you,

not in me leather gloves.

THEY LAUGH

-I'll speak to you on the phone soon, Rachael.

-All right, darling. Thanks very much for my day.

-Yeah, thanks for coming out with us.

-Thank you for gracing us with your presence.

-You'd better believe it.

-It's been a pleasure.

-God love you.

Right, I'm going then. I'll see you soon.

-All right. See you later.

-Tara, lads.

It's been a long day, a cold day.

Yeah, but I've enjoyed it. I've... We've had a good day.

This job was hard.

They say it was easy, but I think it was hard, really hard.

The smell.

I take my hat off to them... Ta-da!

No, it was, em, yeah, good. I've enjoyed it.

I've really enjoyed it.

And I'll come out again soon if they'll have me.

All right. Cheers, thanks a lot. Cheers. See you later.

-Cheers, bye.

-Bye.

Yeah, it went OK. It was a bit... It's always one of those things,

I was nervous at the start and you're conscious that you may

be rambling a little bit, but then, eh, it went well.

I think that was very interesting.

It was a very good - very good spread of candidates in my view.

I didn't want to let myself down and I don't think I have.

I think I've done my best and that's all we can do in anything,

in any situation, is just do our best.

You can see on these scores there's two distinct groups.

-Yeah.

-But those that got it.

And it's pretty obvious those that didn't get it.

-Not quite get it, yes.

-My gut feeling is we've got an individual here...

-I think so too.

-..who is going to be right for the job, who performed in the interview.

I totally agree.

The wait always is the hardest bit and it's always excruciating

because you just want to know.

Let's just see if it stands the test of an overnight sleep.

Fingers crossed, this time next week I'll maybe know something.

Hopefully, fingers crossed.

Keep walking. You're going to get into the...

-That's all right that, innit?

-Yeah.

Four weeks and six truckloads later,

finally the channel at Davyhulme is fat free.

We've actually taken out of this channel 87 tonnes of fat.

The carbon implications are that a tonne of biodiesel keeps

a car off the road for a year.

So we've effectively, by actually doing this process,

took 32 cars off the road for the emissions and everything

else that is dangerous to the environment for a entire year.

It's quite impressive and it's only on one small part of the works, you know.

We've saved, just on this one project alone,

over £100,000 for United Utilities.

This time, we've give the fat away for nothing.

Next time, it might be an actual product we sell.

# ..And I'm feeling good. #

Mate, I can't wait for this shift to be over.

Why?

Another day, another dollar.

Last day, last shift - can't be that bad.

Yeah, this is the end of the dream team, so they say.

What do you think, Tez? Are you happy I'm leaving or what, mate?

Yeah, can't wait. Get someone decent 'work with.

That's it.

LAUGHS

It's been emotional. The world is our oyster today.

I'll not be questioned on my last shift.

Turn your light off there, mate. Let's rock.

-You're not going to miss working wi' me?

-No, mate.

Cheers, pal.

I'm not going to miss thinking about shit all day.

The first job is a blocked manhole in Blackpool.

Although it is the last time you will ever use this wagon

with me in it, do not dirty it.

She's empty, mate.

It's not, it's full. Bet you a fiver.

Oh, yes!

Full.

Can you smell the aroma?

It'll be the last time I'm smelling you, baby.

THEY LAUGH

I feel quite overwhelmed I'm leaving actually. I'm quite excited.

Look at him - he has to mix it up.

Yeah, you have to see what they've been eating, don't we?

Can I do it?

Excuse me. You're not trained enough for this.

It's a bit hard fo' leave Terry

because we've both been friends for a while now

but I'm happy to leave me job and go to a new start, new beginnings.

See where my life leads.

Used to be a bromance. Now it's see you later, pal.

Oh, yeah, it's just a bit of - bit of tissue there.

Gone, it's gone.

I'll miss the lads because they've been...

Well, you're with them more than your girlfriend, you know.

All the time in them wagons with them lads.

HE SNIFFS

Friendship!

C'mon! And I think he is upset.

He don't want me to go anyway.

That's why he keeps saying, "Can we go for a drink tonight?

"Can we go go-karting? Can we do something?"

Can we do this? Can we do that?

Love you, mate.

It'll be all right.

Last number, is it? In the back street up there, innit?

With the manhole cleared, it's onto a blocked pipe just down the road.

Sure! My God!

Watch out fo' fudge!

Watch out fo' dog fudge! There's millions of fudge!

Where we...was this it?

I don't know which one's which. Must be this one. In 'ere.

Hold that.

Mate, I'll just open gate for you.

You all right? Sorry to bother you.

The council reported a little dip in the highway, in the back street there.

-Yeah?

-Is there any chance we could put a camera through the sewer?

-Yeah.

-There's a trap that used to be there.

No, it's in this corner.

Watch what you're doing, mate.

I'm sure it's in this corner. There it is.

Yes.

-Where is it? Is it in there, really?

-Yes.

Once they find the trap, they put a camera down to locate the blockage.

Whooh! This bin smells like your bed sheets.

THEY LAUGH

Cheers, mate.

So, it's like here? On the wall.

So, what we're doing now is just because we've camera-ed that trap,

there's a slight open joint, which is the pipe pushed away,

so the water's running to ground, so we're going to put a dig

onto that there just to get that pipe replaced and changed up.

Where it is, that's...

It's like in the corner but like a foot back from fence, Tez.

Terry likes to locate it. Then I try and have a go as well.

When we've both been testing,

we're both nigh-on bang on within a few inches of each other.

I'm always better than Terry.

Go from there, that hole.

I'm good, I'm good. Are you happy, mate?

I'm happy, happy as Larry.

# If I'm happy, you happy. #

After more than 42 years at the company,

it's Joe's final day in the office.

I think it's going to be harder work, once I retire.

I've got a lot of DIY to get through.

Still apprehensive, to be honest, still apprehensive about finishing

but I know I'm going to go.

Been part of your life for such a long time really.

A decision's been made on who will take over his role.

-Hello.

-Come in, Andy. Have a seat.

-Nice to see you, Andy.

-I don't need to introduce you again to Joe, do I?

No, I've met him before.

Right, we're here to talk about the results of the interview

process that we went through last week.

We spent the week deliberating about the choice

we were going to make and it's not been an easy choice for us at all

but, to cut to the chase, erm,

you've been unsuccessful on this occasion.

Don't want you to be worried that you didn't do it justice.

-You absolutely did.

-Yeah.

You know, and it was very, very close in the end, erm,

particularly with yourself there.

Yeah. Can I ask who it was who got it?

-Yeah, Neil.

-Neil? Yeah, I thought it was.

Obviously disappointed because

it's the third time I've gone for it now and I keep thinking...

-You just start thinking am I doing something wrong or something?

-No.

But then each time you keep getting pipped to the post by someone,

-you know, and that's fair enough. That's how it is.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-All right.

-Cheers. No worries, thanks a lot. Cheers.

-Cheers.

-Cheers, Andy.

Yes, I'm a bit disappointed, erm, but it's just one of those things.

You just have to carry on.

Each time I always do take it on the chin and keep going.

I don't, you know, sulk about it or anything.

As much as inside I may be disappointed.

You know, but, hopefully, I just have to wait for the right opportunity.

Last job, mate. Hopefully, it's an easy one, eh?

Oh, mate, you can tell when it's been here for a bit

because it's even got dead slugs in top.

See that? Oh, yes.

That's a good smelling one, ain't it?

It's nice that, mate. Bit of a stubborn one, any road.

-Water up.

-It were a bit tight there a minute ago.

-It's gone now.

-Do you reckon someone lost a plonger?

I reckon so.

The thing I'll miss most, like, is the satisfaction of people being

able to flush their toilets again.

You know once we've gone and... They start worrying a bit, you see,

when it starts bubbling in the toilets.

Come on. Let's rock it out.

Home time. End of drainage.

May I just make this clear - this manhole lid that I'm about to put

down will be the very last lid I ever lift up in my life.

Can't even put it down right. Ha-ha. Thank you.

Pack the wagon away. Drainage is finished for me now.

-I'll take truck home. You can walk.

-You can take truck home!

It's a sweet drive home now and, eh, that's the shift complete.

Another day in the office - done.

And finished.

Cheers, mate. It's been a pleasure.

It has.

It has. See you later, pal. You start walking.

Train station this way?

Train station. I'm off, mate.

I take you back cos I like you.

C'mon.

Job's a good 'un!

Mate, how many hours you do think we've spent in this cab together?

A fair few.

About 20 million.

MUSIC: "I'll Be Missing You" by Puff Daddy/Faith Evans/112

Eh, this is like end of an era right now.

-Eh?

-It's like end of an era.

We're here and I'll never be here again.

Yeah.

# When you went away... #

This is our last song.

Just to say Brom will never be in the office again.

Woo-hoo!

Thank God.

No more days in the office.

THEY RAP: But you're not around

Know you're in heaven just smiling down

Watching us while we pray for you...

I'm hoping that he'll keep in contact with me, outside work.

We just won't get to work with each other again.

I'm happy. I've really enjoyed the job but that's it.

Time to move on now. Job done.

All the best, pal.

-It's been a good 'un.

-Good 'un.

-Let's keep in touch, yeah?

-Will do.

Remember, if you're seeing any more girls, wear condoms and that.

HE LAUGHS

-Just go, go.

-All right, mate. Just take care. Just text us and that.

-I'll see you at weekend.

-See you in a bit. Yeah.

-You take care, mate.

-Love you.

Just say tara to everyone that I've not seen and that,

-know what I mean?

-All right. Love you.

Love you, mate!

GENERAL BACKGROUND CHATTER

If I can...if I can have everybody's attention just for a minute.

Joe was hoping that he'd just slink out of the door

and nobody would notice but, after 42 years' service,

which Joe has in, that was never going to happen.

Great.

I think I can sort of sense how well respected you've

been by how many people have just turned up impromptu.

So, it's just for me on behalf of everybody to really

thank you for the service.

From my point of view, it's been an absolutely fantastic journey.

I just added up this morning, how much in terms of capital

investment has been championed by Joe.

It was just shy of half a billion pound.

So, that's how significant it's been

and that's just in the last eight years.

-They won't be sacking 'im. >

-Yeah, exactly!

So, massive contribution. Andrew.

Yeah, OK.

-So, eh...

-That's the something old.

Right. Again.

-And that's the something new.

-With it being 42 years,

we decided that we needed to recognise that spread of service.

So, as Andy's just said, we've got

something old for you that we'd like to present to you.

Thank you.

JOE LAUGHS

It's a pair of North West Water cuff links.

-Cuff links!

-LAUGHTER

I'll get the use of them, won't I?

-Of course, we're not North West Water any more.

-Brilliant.

We've got something branded with United Utilities, so...

-Brilliant, thank you very much.

-Just a couple of small tokens.

Oh, that's lovely. Thank you very much all.

Erm... I'd like to thank you all.

To be honest, I've had 42 good years.

Erm, yeah, I don't really want to say much more about that

but, eh, thank you very much for turning up.

Thank you very much. And I'll see you.

And I formally thank you, Joe, and wish you well in your retirement.

I've always said I would go when I was ready and I think I'm ready.

It's the people I'll miss, to be honest. You know, the daily

interactions. It's the little things that come up and, yeah,

it's going to be different.

I think that's everything. 42 years in a box.

I am happy to go.

I know all good things have got to come to an end sometime.

See you next month.

I'm just sorry to leave all these people behind.

-Thanks, Andy.

-It's all right.

-Well, thanks very much for all your help, Andy.

-All the best.