Should I Stay or Should I Go? Young Soldiers

It's a dangerous time to be a soldier in the British Army...

..as almost 380 British troops have been killed in Afghanistan

and nearly 1,700 seriously injured...

-Show me your war face!

-HE YELLS

Stop being weak!

..and yet thousands of young men from all across the UK

want to join the army and get their chance to fight for their country.

When you go in, you will go.

This series tells the story of four young men on their journey

from civvies to soldiers...

Got 30 bastard odd pence in.

..beginning on their first day as new recruits...

Left turn!

You got it wrong!

..through to front-line combat in Helmand.

SOLDIER SHOUTS ORDERS

Jesus Christ!

Stand to! Stand to!

You will serve a minimum of four years.

Before joining the army,

Ashley Cavanagh was a shelf-stacker at Asda.

It's just nerves at the moment, I think.

You're scared to smile!

Get on your belt buckle! Not crawl!

Andrew Forti was struggling as a tiler,

trying to support his three-year-old son.

Did you miss Daddy? Yeah?

You have your bad days and good days. You've got to pull through it.

Don't fucking stop! You wouldn't stop on a battlefield!

Darren Meads was living with his mum and signing on the dole.

Where's your hair?

It's the adrenalin that every soldier likes.

And Lee Howard was training to be a hairdresser.

Anyone can get hurt. That's the name of the job, isn't it?

Quick march!

They're about to enter the second phase of basic training...

..and things are about to get even tougher.

Can they survive the rest of the course...

There's one here!

..and pass out as infantry soldiers?

What do you see?

I mean I'm definitely sticking out six months.

No way I'm going home!

After enjoying their first weekend off in five weeks,

the recruits are preparing to return to Catterick in North Yorkshire

to complete the rest of their basic training.

Living in Eastbourne, 19-year-old Lee has got a long journey back.

Behave yourself.

Do as you're told.

I haven't had a massive income.

I haven't got a career on the go, so I haven't had any, er...

future images of what I could do.

I've always been worrying whether I would be able to move out

whether I'm going to be able to get a car,

whether I'm going to be... all the little stuff, really,

but which is massive stuff in the long run.

If Lee completes his training

and graduates as a professional soldier, he'll be committed to serve

in the army for a minimum of four years,

earning a basic salary of 17 grand a year.

He'll be following in the footsteps of his older brother, Chris,

who's in rehab after being blown up

by an explosive device in Afghanistan.

Chris has been offering Lee some constructive advice.

I just let him know he wasn't in the army yet.

Put him in his place.

He's like, "Yeah,

"I will be in 20 weeks," or something.

I said, "You're not in the army till you have your first contact.

"That's when you're in the army."

Chances are Lee will probably go next May or September,

to Afghan.

So that...that really concerns me now.

Like I've said before, "They don't all die

"and they don't all come back maimed,"

and I think that Lee will make a very good soldier.

Yeah, it'll be good. But I will be absolutely shitting myself

once he gets out there.

The first five weeks of training

was about introducing the recruits to army life,

but now if they're to survive the next 19 weeks,

they're going to need the skills of real combat soldiers.

Hey, Boner! Come here, man.

-You all right, man?

-Yeah, are you all right?

Nice to see you.

The recruits are now allowed more personal privileges...

..and 20-year-old Ashley is making the most of his home comforts.

-What have you got?

-Ben 10.

I've got SpongeBob, mate!

Ah, that's looks more comfy as well!

You're lucky, bro!

I was going to get that.

After enjoying the freedom of a weekend off,

it's straight back to the discipline of army life.

Start getting into your beds now.

See you in the morning, then, 05.

-Good night, fellas.

-Good night.

The recruits still have the right to quit the army

for the next six weeks.

But it's not just them who have a decision to make.

The army also needs to be sure

that these young soldiers have got what it takes

both physically and mentally,

so they can perform on the battlefield and be ready for war.

Right, hold it there!

Welcome to bayonet lesson one.

From your time in the infantry,

it may occur when you're out in Afghanistan,

you may need to close and engage with the enemy with bayonets fitted.

It's psychological. If the enemy see you running with a bayonet,

they know you'll thrust that into their sternum,

they'll be shitting themselves, won't they?

-Yes, Corporal!

-OK?

Ensure you kill him instead of him killing you.

Does everyone understand that?

-Yes, Corporal!

-OK, then. Look here for a complete demonstration.

-HE YELLS

-You motherfucker!

Come on! You fucker!

Fix bayonets!

Remove scabbards!

-Adopt the high port position!

-High port!

The bayonet lesson is all about teaching the recruits

about controlled aggression,

to prepare them for closing in and killing the enemy.

-En garde!

-En garde!

-High port!

-High port!

-That's a shit one!

Mr Cavanagh, I can see some pussies in this platoon.

-Front rank, en garde!

-En garde!

Show me some fucking aggression, front rank!

-Fucking switch on, Howard! Are you fucking stupid?

-Yes, Corporal!

-You fucking are, aren't you?

-Yes, Corporal!

-Take your fucking bayonet!

-Taking bayonet, Corporal!

-Go round the left!

-Yes, Corporal!

-En garde!

-En garde!

I want to see it in your eyes that you want to kill these fuckers!

Imagine these dummies are the Taliban

that has just fucking killed some of your mates!

You want to fucking kill them! Show me your war face!

THEY YELL

Need some fucking more aggression, show me your war face.

Show me your war face!

What do we want to do to the enemy?

Kill!

THEY YELL

Kill! Kill! Kill!

Kill! Kill!

OK, hold it there.

Fit scabbards.

Before joining the army, Ashley lived with his mum and dad in Leeds.

Adrenalin takes over and you just...

turn into a totally different person.

And then a second later you can click back into yourself,

and then he'll say "en garde"

and you click back into that other person.

But for 22-year-old Darren Meads,

the prospect of hand-to-hand combat doesn't faze him.

Yeah, I'd use it straightaway.

Wouldn't think twice about it. Too right.

Do you think it would, do you think it's...

would be easy, then, to just... make that decision?

Kill somebody? Yeah.

Definitely. If he's coming at you, he's probably got the same weapon,

he's coming at you, you get to him before he gets to you.

That's what it's all about.

I really do enjoy it, yeah, I love being,

like, in training for the army,

but you have to think about the sacrifices that you make to be here.

And whether it is actually worth it like, I know they've, um,

put the money up in Afghanistan for £29 a day, is it?

How much would you consider taking to risk your life for six months?

That's what you need to think about, isn't it?

It's not just the money, it's your life!

I'd rather walk away with my life than any amount of money,

to be quite honest.

Two British soldiers have died after they were fatally wounded...

100 British soldiers have now been killed in Afghanistan this...

A British solider has been killed in Afghanistan.

His family has been informed.

Both families have been informed.

Almost 380 British soldiers have been killed

in combat in Afghanistan.

And 80% of those casualties have been from the infantry.

Six more servicemen killed in Afghanistan in less than a week.

The loss of life is intense.

All the recruits are given pastoral care

to help ready them for the realities

of joining the British Army at such a dangerous time.

We've got to be honest about what we do.

There is a chance that you or I could be killed

on operations in Afghanistan.

If you didn't realise that by now, it's time to realise. OK?

It's kind of, you know, it's a serious game, isn't it?

We could look at the fact that we send lots of people out there,

and in a sense very few of them come back dead,

but we need to realise that sadly somebody will, OK?

Who's got a will?

Anybody not got a will?

OK. Just think about wills. Wills are a good thing.

If you haven't sorted anything like that, have a think about it.

Death letters. Anybody know about death letters?

A death letter is a letter that you write

that gets sent in the case of your death. All right?

Any of you written letters like that?

These are very dangerous things. OK?

You've got to be careful where it ends up and who knows about it.

Does that make sense? MURMURING

Yeah, good, um, and then, er, leave no loose ends.

And before you go on tour, just have a quick look at your life.

If you've got five girlfriends, maybe drop four of them.

Just think about your life before you disappear off on tour.

Does that make sense? Yeah?

Great! Thanks very much.

Thank you, Padre.

'These lessons that we do with them'

in training are about, um...

preparing the ground, really, so we can assist them, in all this stuff.

I don't think they really understand

how it's going to be until they get there.

Even though the army try to prepare the recruits

for the realities of war,

for many, the thought of fighting on the front line

seemed distant and far-removed.

However, having had his brother blown up just 12 months ago,

Lee and his family have seen, first-hand, the ravages of war.

But don't forget, you see, we saw Chris get brought back

and the state he was in and everything.

I don't know whether Lee's really come to terms with that himself.

And, um, because the army say to them, "Oh, at least one of you are

"going to die out of the group you're in and one's going to get maimed,"

obviously that shook Lee up completely.

And he actually texted me the other night,

and said, "Mum can you pray for me?"

What's your last two of your army number, Howard?

64, Corporal.

Six weeks into training,

the prospect of deploying to Afghanistan has proved too much.

Well, I just decided to leave this week because,

just so many things are going on in my head.

The thought of going to Afghan next year isn't very good.

Three more people died on the weekend,

which sort of makes you start thinking a bit more as well.

I've been thinking about my brother loads,

and how my brother's been at home and that,

cos obviously what happened to him.

The whole thought of dying, or getting hurt like that,

and seeing my family go through that sort of stuff again,

I couldn't do it.

-'Do you think he joined the army for the wrong reasons?

-Yeah.

'Yeah, I do.'

Yeah. I think he... personally I think he joined

to try and get back at the people that attacked Chris.

That's why I reckon he joined.

For the remaining troops back in training, things are hotting up.

GUNFIRE

Next man in!

What do you see?

Once the recruits complete their basic training,

they'll be joining an infantry regiment called the Rifles,

which is made of five different battalions.

Grab a seat, there's paper under the chairs, fellas.

Each of these battalions are based in different locations -

four in the UK and one in Germany.

Crucially, some of the battalions will be deploying to Afghanistan

sooner than others.

Be under no illusions what you're committing yourselves to today.

That went on all day from dusk till dawn.

The recruits are about to make the biggest decision

of their army careers so far,

as they have to decide which battalion they prefer to join.

OK, 1 Rifles, located in Chepstow, right on the border of Wales.

Not quite. Spitting distance.

2 Rifles, located in Ballykilner, Northern Ireland.

Nice little selling point there fellas, £6.11 extra per day.

3 Rifles, located in Edinburgh, which is a European City of Culture.

Also they do ceremonial duties at the castle.

Doesn't sound too inviting,

but I'm hearing it's an attraction to the ladies,

goes down well with the single lads.

4 Rifles, located in Bulford, in Wiltshire.

5 Rifles, located in Paderborn in Germany.

Pick up the paperwork in front of you.

It says, "Preference one, preference two."

Simply put the number of the battalion you will wish to go to,

and next to it there's two spaces there

to put a brief explanation as to why you want to go to them battalions.

The lads are making a decision

that could affect the rest of their army lives.

4th Battalion.

I was in-between 2 and 5, to be honest.

Yeah, put overseas experience.

Yeah, how do you spell that?

It's one word, isn't it, overseas? Yeah?

1 Rifles are the next battalion to deploy to Afghanistan,

so have the greatest need for new troops.

And Darren has narrowed his preferences down to two.

4th Battalion and 3rd Battalion.

4th, I've put, "Good friends in the battalion.

"The tour date's not till 2012, that gives me enough chance to like,

"get to know my section, get to know the lads and stuff."

The third one I've just put, "It's a good lifestyle for a young soldier."

Don't know what else to put.

1 Rifles goes in March.

And then 2 and 5 go... deploy together at the end of,

er, September, I think it was, next year, or something like that.

I don't want to go on tour just yet.

There's plenty of time for that, in't there? To go on tour.

What have you put for your reasons?

I'd rather be, like, close to home, no not close to home,

but I'd rather be, like, London's about a hundred mile from me,

which is ideal, so at weekends I can just drive home and see my son.

Andrew doesn't live with his three-year-old son

but wants to be posted as close to him as possible.

With only a one-in-five chance

of being assigned the battalion of his choice,

he's not holding his breath.

To be honest, I think they've already decided where we're going.

They've made their mind up.

You write this down for no reason. It's already set.

They just send you where they want.

I won't get any of my choices.

I don't want to go to 1, though, that's the problem. Definitely not.

What are you putting, then, Ash?

Don't know, don't really care,

cos I know I'm not going to get what I want.

-What did you put, Ray?

-2 and 5.

-Which is shit.

-Why don't you think you're going to get 4 then, though?

-Fucking everybody's putting it down.

-Who's putting 4?

-Everybody.

Ashley's got an even bigger decision to make.

With only five days to go until he's committed for the next four years,

Ashley needs to decide whether or not he even wants to be in the army.

I wish I knew what I wanted to do.

I just don't know whether it's worth going to Afghan for.

Such a hard choice to make as well.

And it's hard to explain

to people that aren't here.

A long way from the world of soldiering,

Ashley's dad runs a car showroom outside Leeds.

-You couldn't hear any squeaking or anything like that?

-No.

-At least we've reported it to them then.

-Yeah.

-Thanks, mate.

Obviously I'll always have that Afghanistan

in the back of my head, always, I mean...

I've got it on my favourites - every day I look at it.

You just need to know, really, you know, you just always

constantly want to know, but I don't think it's healthy at all.

I think what I've probably got to do is take a step back from it,

and then, you know, depending on where he goes, whether it's

Three Rifles or Four Rifles or wherever,

I'll have to just wait until that time comes and, you know,

just enjoy his achievements while he's in the army, like I say,

not think about that at all, until the time comes, you know,

otherwise it's a bit morbid.

But for his mum, whose father was in the army,

she's got no doubt about what Ashley should do.

Hopefully, fingers crossed, if everything goes well,

he'll have a good life out of this.

I think so, and he loves it, he really does like it,

and he's fought so hard to get in that it would just be such a shame,

you know, to sort of come out on a whim and regret it for a long time,

and it could take him a hell of a long time to get back in again.

I don't think there's anything out there for the kids any more,

I just think the army could,

if you enjoy it, it'll give him a great life, I think he'll love it.

And if you put the Afghan thing aside, trying to think about that

too much, and I think the sky's the limit for him, I really do.

Over in Eastbourne,

it's been four weeks since Lee Howard quit the army.

-How are you doing, all right?

-Hello.

After his brother Chris was blown up in Afghanistan,

Lee decided going to war wasn't for him.

Chris was awarded compensation for the loss of his limbs...

And looking very happy.

..and he's using these proceeds to finance a new business

his family have always dreamt of - a funeral home.

Today is the grand opening,

and Chris's former commanding officer is the guest of honour.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm now going to exercise a huge honour and open

Payne & Sons with Rifleman Chris Howard.

It is now open.

That's good, innit?

Chris, I'd like to salute you for what you've done

A, s a rifleman, but B, as a man.

And I think it's fantastic that this project at Payne & Sons

now comes to fruition, it gives you a chance to do stuff

for people in town of Eastbourne.

But with a great man there's always a great woman,

and if it's not your wife it's your mum.

-That's right.

-Donna has been amazing,

in the same way that Chris has displayed huge courage

and great humanity, Donna has been an amazing mother

over the last twelve months, and has stood by her boy

in the face of incredible adversity,

and has kept him going, and has been a great motivator for him.

Well, I haven't written a speech,

I just want to say thank you to everybody who's come.

This has been my dream for about three years.

We tried desperately to raise money. Sorry.

That's all right.

No, I'm all right.

We tried desperately to raise money.

Three banks didn't want to know.

They refused us.

So the dream started to go.

And Chris, he had his accident.

And with his compensation he said, "We can do this together."

Sorry.

We have to make it work,

and to give Chris

a decent life as well, because he's spent all his money!

It went really well there.

I always cry when I talk about Chris.

You make me bloody cry an' all.

Well, done bruv.

I was hoping I'd come back and see everyone happy,

and my brother's happy, and it's good to see that, to be honest.

There was a time when I thought I'd lose him.

And it makes me happy, sitting here watching him

sort of getting involved with this.

After ten weeks of training, Ashley's finally made a decision.

'As it's got closer and closer,

'I've just been in turmoil whether to actually stay or leave.

'If I serve four years, I could possibly go to Afghan twice.

'And the likelihood of coming back both times with not a scratch on you

'is highly, highly unlikely.'

He doesn't want to seem like, um, you know,

he's chickening out or he's scared or anything,

It's only natural to be

'apprehensive about going somewhere like Afghanistan.'

But I think particularly for Rifleman Cavanagh, I think it

might be playing on him more than others.

At the end of the day I can't make him not.

It's his choice, it's his right.

I don't think it's worth the money

and the effort and stuff, like I said before,

it's not worth it all, it's...

..stupid, really. I've got other things that I'd rather do,

I'm 20, I've not lived my life yet, not properly, anyway.

You know, I've barely gone out, barely done stupid stuff.

So I'd rather go back, find a proper career that I really want to do.

You know, despite the fact that it's an exciting career -

you know, there's all sorts of things to do there...

You know, it was always in the back of my mind, Afghanistan,

and, you know, it didn't sit well at all.

It's still upsetting for Ashley, you know, because

it's kind of one of his dreams has gone by, really, you know.

As much as David felt differently, I always sort of took a back step.

This is purely Ashley's decision,

and I just, even though my life in the army was brilliant

when I was a kid, I knew Ashley could have all that and more

but for the Afghanistan thing, that was the biggest stumbling block.

Left, right, left, right, left, right.

14 weeks into basic training, the remaining recruits are now

committed to serve in the British army for the next four years.

All right, gents, get your suits on.

For those that have stayed the course,

the intensity of their training is about to be ramped up.

You will be exposed to CS.

It's part of the training, you will be called forward as an individual,

and you will take your respirator off

and you will be exposed to CS

by shouting our your regimental service number, your name,

your rank - whether you're a rifleman or a private -

and what regiment you come from.

Happy?

-I'll be in a fucking state when I get out.

-I'm looking forward to this!

Bit nervous. I think I'm going to choke and puke a few times.

Gas! Gas! Gas!

The recruits are about to be exposed to CS, or tear gas,

to try and build their confidence

in the kit and equipment they're issued with.

OK, let's go, come on, go lads.

OK, what's going to happen guys, when you go into the chamber,

what I want you to do

is go around the right-hand side and start walking around.

Let's go! Go, let's go! Let's go, let's go! Get in there.

Soldiers are not routinely exposed in this way

once they've completed their training.

Gents.

Now you're going to take your respirator fully off

and give your regimental service number,

your name, your rank

and your section commander.

Let's go. Take it off.

-Let's go.

-I'm...

-HE COUGHS

-Come on mate!

I am...

Come on.

All right, come on.

301236 Section Commander Hodges, 1st Battalion regiment, um...

-HE COUGHS

-Section Commander?

Section Commander Hodges?

All right, well done. Come on.

Come on then. Well done.

Next!

Next!

Sergeant...

Two Commander, well done.

Towards me. Come on.

Towards me.

You feel like you can't breathe in or out or anything. It's horrible.

Then bogeys and stuff start coming out your mouth,

started dribbling everywhere, and erm...he let me out.

But I'm going on a sickie next time, definitely. Ain't doing that again.

With only eight weeks to go until the recruits graduate,

the army needs to add more realism to the training exercises

and recreate some of the conditions

they might find themselves fighting in on the battlefield.

Erm...we've used condoms, we have,

filled with fake blood that they use on med training.

That should go well.

GUNFIRE Go for it, let's go. Get down.

Go! Go! Under the barbed wire!

And of course a little bit of encouragement never hurts.

Come on! Stop being weak!

You're trying to kill him, you're not tickling him!

If you're like this in Afghan, you will get killed, do you understand?

Good! Good! Good!

Come on, men.

Stop being weak!

Aaargh!

Fucking get down!

-Come on! Get up!

-Aaargh!

-Come on!

-Aargh, aaargh!

Calm down, calm down.

Compose yourself, calm down.

-You all right?

-Sir.

-Your weapon.

It was fucking full-on, straight through.

Very, very, very fucking hard.

My knees are cut to pieces.

I couldn't calm down for a minute.

-There were no soft ground at all, were there?

-No. Not at all.

You get so aggressive when you're doing it, don't you? So angry.

I couldn't calm down for a minute. I feel like crying. It's weird.

The remaining recruits are enjoying a well-earned weekend off

away from the army.

When they return after this short break

they'll find out which battalion they've been assigned to,

and where they'll be based for the next four years.

Andrew is separated from his wife, so his three year-old son Kian

has come to stay with him during his time off.

-Have you missed your daddy?

-Yeah.

Lots and lots? Like jelly tots?

Do you like Daddy being in the army?

-Yeah.

-Yeah? Why?

-Cos I do.

-Do you?

-Yeah.

-Are you proud of him?

-Do you think Daddy's a big boy?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

It's just so nice when they're together.

You know... Erm...it's just that little look on his face.

And Andrew just gets... He's like a little kid himself I suppose,

he gets really excited to see him,

you know, can't wait to see him.

Yeah, it's really lovely.

Really nice to see.

Right, come here then.

-I can play with this bit. I've picked some out before you get it.

-Did you?

Have you got any milk, yeah?

Tomorrow, when Andrew returns to the army,

he'll find out when he's heading to the front line.

So I don't just want to get shipped straight out there.

I might end up getting shot or something, knowing me.

I am looking forward to going, but six months is a long time,

and being away from my son for that long as well,

that's going to be really hard, that'll be the hardest part.

Lift your arms. Put that there, look.

'When he's older it'll be easier, cos he'll understand more.

'But obviously, he's only three, and he ain't going to understand

'where I'm going for six months and how to explain it to him.'

Oh, I don't know.

I'm trying not to think about that, to be honest.

Over in Doncaster, Darren's also thinking about his family.

His mum and dad split up when he was three years old.

There's a picture of me as a baby with my dad.

It was just downstairs in the kitchen, that.

Just lets me know I've got a dad.

When he did a tour of Afghanistan last year with the TA,

he fell out with his dad.

He's more the politics side of life.

So he was just like, "You're going to go out there,

"you're going to get treated like shit, you're going to die..."

type thing.

The politics don't give a fuck about you,

the army doesn't give a fuck about you.

You know, that type of attitude.

I didn't want to hear it.

Why would you want to hear that?

So I just told him to fuck off, that were it.

I didn't talk to him until six months later, when I got back.

If I were a dad, and my son were doing something..

something really good that I'd think...

I don't know, a good job or whatever,

I'd be constantly wanting to talk to him,

just constantly wanting to see him.

And just tell him how proud you are of him

and things like that, but...

I don't hear anything from him.

With six weeks still remaining until they pass out,

the recruits are about to find out

which of the five battalions they'll be joining.

If they get assigned to 1 Rifles,

they could be heading to Afghanistan in less than a year.

This is one of the days they've been looking forward to

for the last couple of weeks - months, probably -

to find out whether they'll be going once they leave here.

So... Much anticipated, relief and joy for some,

and obviously slight disappointment,

or a lot of disappointment for others.

I'm not going to get what I want.

Oh, it's stressing me out.

I really don't want One.

I've put 4 and 2 for my battalions.

But as long as we're together, it won't be as bad if we're together.

All right, we're going. We're going.

It's our lives they're playing around with here.

It's been so emotional these last two days.

In you go guys.

The moment has arrived, the one you've all been waiting for.

This list will not change.

OK? Where you're going you will go, basically,

and that's the end of the story.

Charnley, 2 Rifles.

Forti, 1 Rifles.

Malcolm, 1 Rifles.

Meads, 1 Rifles.

There shouldn't really be any shocks or surprises, OK?

Cos you know 1 Rifles are going on tour first, OK?

so they're the guys who need people.

As a Rifleman you need to stay with a battalion for at least three years

before you are eligible for a transfer.

Unfortunately I can't change it, no-one here can change it.

It's done at a regimental level. The regiment decides where you're going

and as I said, that's it.

The army cannot function without, unfortunately,

being slightly selfish and putting itself first,

and everybody who joins...

in the first week or two,

is always briefed that the ethos that the army works

is that the army comes first, and your life,

and your personal life, and that of your family, comes a close second.

Having been assigned to 1 Rifles, they're both heading to war

in less than six months.

Bit gutted really, but never mind.

I'm not going to complain to the fucking platoon commander about it

and try and get it changed and all that shit.

Fuck that. Pussies do that.

I'll just deal with it.

I'll see what my mum says.

-'Yeah, but when are they going on tour?'

-March.

'So you're going in March.'

And they do three months' deployment training before.

So basically as soon as I pass out of here...

'You're going straight into training.'

Yeah.

'How do you feel about that?'

There's fuck all I can do about it though, is there?

'Is it because, you know, 1 Rifles -

'I've been reading up on it on the internet -

'it's quite an elite battalion, it's...the best, if you like.'

She's doing her fucking history now.

'Is it because they've seen something in you...

'There's only six men out of 1st Rifles

'who've been killed throughout this war.

'that's quite a low number compared to all the rest.'

-I didn't know that!

-'I don't know if they've seen something in you

'and they've thought you've got the heart,

'you've got the balls for it.

'You're not farting around, you're not messing about.

'And I think they've seen that,

'and they're thinking, "You're not going to shit around,

'"let's give you the elite group." Number One, come on.

'You know?'

-You just think I'm a ninja.

-'You are a ninja!

'No, you're a ninja! Come on!

'You are the ninja, you need to be with the ninja group.

'The other option is come out altogether and be a bum.'

Fuck that.

'Exactly. Exactly.'

All right, I'll give you a ring later on anyway.

'All right darling. I love you.'

-Love you too.

-'See you later. Bye.'

-Bye.

When she puts it like that, that I'm a ninja,

you just think, "Well, I'm going to be a ninja."

Yeah, I'm happy with that.

He'll not know how frightened I am.

I won't let him see it. Do you know what I mean?

I'll, I'll do that privately.

He might need to keep his spirits up and his strength up,

so that he can go out there and not be worrying about me,

because I don't want him worrying about me.

I'll worry about him, but he's not worrying about me.

I'll do a lot of praying, and a lot of crying,

and I'll do a lot of "Oh, my God, oh, my God."

I'd rather him be a lorry driver or something,

but I can't... Darren just wouldn't be happy.

They've lost...

I don't know the total count now,

but I know it's over 300 - 300 men -

in, what, ten years?

Have we been there ten years?

Coming up for 11 years, aren't we?

In Dunkirk, where my granddad was,

in Dunkirk, in three months, they lost about 72,000.

72,000 in one tour.

It's a big difference, isn't it?

In three months.

You know what I mean? And my granddad survived!

I just don't want him to be part of those statistics,

but I'm sure every mother of those boys that have died,

those men that have died, have...

Do you know what I mean? Have said the same thing.

And I can't imagine how they must feel.

I can't.

Andrew's also breaking the news to his mum, Diane.

'Right, well, you're not happy about it then?'

Um, I weren't too impressed,

but I'm with Meads and I go on tour in March.

'Where are we going to in March?'

-Afghan.

-'Oh, right.'

-That's where I get sent out on, erm...thing.

'Yeah.'

I'd, rather... I really wanted to go to 2 now, but never mind.

-I've got to go, Mum, cos I've got things to do.

-'All right then.'

-All right, I'll speak to you later.

-'OK.'

-Bye-bye.

-'Bye!'

I have to be strong for him, really.

You know, there's no point in me being upset,

all the time, every time I see him

and worrying about it.

Because at the end of the day, it's going to do him no good.

You know, I don't want him to think that I'm at home crying

and upset all the time,

because I know where he is.

I mean, it will upset me when he does go,

but I'm not going to show him that it upsets me, you know?

I want him to know that I'm as strong as he is.

22 weeks in, the recruits are about to begin

their most important training exercise.

Bringing together everything they've been taught for the last six months,

it's the first time they'll be using live ammunition

in a battlefield scenario.

Come on then. Somebody get around here.

This is a combination of everything you've been taught. All right?

So work your hardest, fucking beast yourself,

and let's make it a good attack. All right, guys?

-Yes, sir.

-OK. Happy days.

Darren's been one of the stand-out recruits on the course

and has been given a special role to play in the attack -

the second in command.

It means I get my own fire team to play about with.

Yeah, do stuff for the section as well,

if they need anything doing, I'll do it.

It's basically like a section commander job when he's not around.

Basically, looking after the boys and stuff like that.

It's a hard job, but I love it, I love doing it.

I smell like a horse now!

Ready?

Taylor, are you there?

-Can you hear me on that?

-Yeah, I can.

As the recruits make their way to attack the enemy,

on the high ground, another section will give them covering fire.

12 o'clock in full line, approximately 100 metres,

you'll see a dark green and black wooden bunker.

When I give you the go-ahead to fire,

that's where the enemy'll be.

Go on!

GUNFIRE

Let's go.

But with live ammo in use,

one wrong move by the recruits could be fatal.

Get down, get down!

Darren needs to get his men into firing range

so they can engage the enemy.

We'll push through in 1 Section.

We'll push past 1 Section and we'll be assaulting now.

Roger, they can get the message? Forti, has he got the message?

Keep down, let's go!

Go on, start doubling!

Weapons up in the air, boys, weapons up in the air. Into the gully.

Get in, push in, push in!

-Get in.

-100 metres in!

Enemy! Rapid!

Fire!

Come on, get some rounds down!

Stop!

Man down!

Get his kit, get his kit!

This casualty is a simulation

to teach them how to evacuate their men from the battlefield.

Think about what you're doing! What's his injuries?

He's got two lower leg injuries! Think about what we're going to do.

Calm down, relax. Somebody reassure him, somebody talk to him.

Tony, can you hear me? All right?

Don't worry, we'll get you out of here. Everything's fine.

MAN SCREAMS Let's go!

In less than six months' time,

the recruits could be facing this for real.

Push it out, push it out. Come on! Nearly there.

-Down! Put him down, put him down. Gently.

-Well done, lads.

Yeah, we've come into it and I think everybody's done...

I think my section's done really well, um...

just going through in it, and rates of fire and things like that,

it's, yeah, it's really good.

I love being 2IC, I think it's probably one of the best,

best jobs in the section, at the minute.

So, I'm enjoying it.

26 weeks ago, 28 recruits began their basic training.

Six gruelling months later,

with almost a third of the recruits quitting,

Darren Meads and Andrew Forti

are preparing for their passing out ceremony and graduation

as professional soldiers.

I just can't believe how quick it's come by.

When we was on week three or four I didn't think it would come.

And now we're passing out.

It's the only thing I've ever done well at.

It's the only thing I've ever succeeded in.

Everything else, I've failed miserably.

One of those to quit was 20-year-old Ashley Cavanagh,

who couldn't stay the course and is now back on Civvy Street.

I don't get up at half past four any more! Which is a bonus.

But the excitement in my day-to-day life is pretty much nil.

So... Yeah, that's a bit pants.

His dad's used his contacts

and got him a job working as a service adviser

in a car showroom.

When you're a civilian, you just have this set life,

you just go to work, you do this, you go home,

maybe you go to the cinema or do that...

You're just doing it constantly, it's just a routine, isn't it?

And it's boring and shite, and you do the same thing every day.

It's not the job I don't like, because the job's good,

but I just hate being home, I just hate being here,

and I'm wishing I'd listened to Corporal Stewart,

because he was so right.

He said to me before the day I leave,

he said, "I'm a good judge of character,

"and I promise you you'll miss it."

He said, "Cavanagh, I promise you you'll miss it." He was so right.

And I've got to be here every day.

Instead of doing something

that I actually wanted to do with my life.

HE COUGHS

Done.

We've been waiting a long time

and it feels like it's been a long time coming,

but it's here. Like, "Yes!"

And to Darren's surprise, his dad's turned up to show his support.

God, I can't wait.

Just get it over and done with. Nervous though.

Hmm.

I've told my mum I'm in the back row, fourth man.

But she'll probably go from the other end,

and get it all wrong.

I can imagine he's well excited down there.

He can't wait to get down here and see everybody

and see his little man. Eh?

-Are you looking forward to seeing your daddy today?

-Yeah.

-Are you going to wave to him?

-Yeah.

-Will you shout, "Wa-ay! Dad!"

-Yeah.

MARCHING BAND PLAY

Halt!

Stand easy!

As is tradition, the recruits' final inspection

will be made by the regiment's top commanding officers,

who will welcome them into the British Army

as professional infantrymen.

Congratulations for passing out.

I'm very much looking forward to having you in the turn out.

I'll see you again.

Well done.

OK, are you married?

I'm separated, Sir.

-OK, children?

-One child, Sir.

And, seeing the child no problem?

-Yeah, he's here now, Sir.

-Is he?

-Yes, Sir.

-OK.

So he'll be proud of his dad.

-Hello, there.

-Sir, I'm Rifleman Meads, joining 1 Rifles, Sir.

-You are, Rifleman Meads, congratulations to you.

-Thank you, Sir.

-Did you volunteer for 1 Rifles?

-It was on the list, Sir.

-On the list.

-Not at the top, Sir.

-Not at the top, that's interesting.

-You'll have to change your mindset on that one.

-Yes, Sir.

-Good.

-And, well, you know our timelines.

-Yes, Sir.

There's a bit of quick movement for Afghan tour for you,

-which will be great.

-Very good to start, Sir.

Well, that's tremendous, we've got a fantastic job out there

and you are joining right at the right time,

-and the thing is buzzing, so you are joining a good unit.

-Yes, Sir.

Congratulations to you. OK.

-Are your parents here today?

-They are, Sir.

-Good.

They should be rightfully proud, congratulations on passing out.

What you've learned over this last 24 weeks

will absolutely give you all of the tools you need

to conduct exemplary service

when you join your battalions shortly.

If I may, but just say thank you to the friends and the families

who provide so much support for these young riflemen and soldiers

who are just about to join their battalions.

Some of you will be joining the 1st Battalion the Rifles,

my battalion, down in Chepstow,

as we spin out for operations in Afghanistan.

And to each and every one of you,

I would like to offer you the very best of luck.

BAND PLAYS

Hello. I was so proud of you!

-Did I look good?

-Oh, you did!

Yeah, apart from that silly little jog at the end.

-You've got a mark round your head.

-Don't put it on your head.

-I don't intend to. Well done.

-Hi. Hiya, Dad.

Hiya. Proud of you son. Brilliant.

-Dad!

-How are you doing? You OK? Yeah.

Daddy's missed you!

Daddy's missed you. Can I have a kiss?

Did you like that?

Oh, I'm really pleased to meet you, actually.

-Yes, and you.

-Yeah.

I am so pleased that they're together now, I really am.

I can't get over how close they've got, and how good friends they are.

He said they didn't really want to go there, the pair of them.

-No.

-And he said, "I don't care," he said,

"as long as I'm with Meads," he goes, "that's it."

"He's my mate, we'll go there, we'll do it all together."

I think when he does go, that will probably the hardest part.

-But I just can't think about it, personally!

-I know!

-I know! It's actually really scary, isn't it?

-It is.

-Well, we must exchange numbers.

-Keep in touch.

Yeah, we'll keep in touch.

-Me and Andrew will be together for the rest of our lives.

-Exactly!

-Let's do this.

-Let's do this.

-Let's do this.

-Let's do this!

-Take care.

-Take care.

-And you.

-See you.

Let's do this, come on!

My mum, my dad and my girlfriend

have been telling me how proud they are and things, but...

they don't realise yet that it's only just started.

EXPLOSION

GUNFIRE

How do you explain things like that to a three-year-old?

-You all be good out there. Come back alive.

-To the lads!

-To the lads!

I know for a fact when I get there, every fucker's going to kill me.

I can't help it, I'm sorry.

Number two. Start getting your kit on, fellas.

Tour starts now.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd