Young, Trans and Looking for Love

This programme contains some strong language.

Arin Andrews and Katie Hill are one of America's most famous teen couples.

Millions follow their romance online

because their love story is one in a million.

She is the perfect woman for me.

Arin and Katie are the first openly transgender teen couple in America.

# Imagine all the girls Ah-ah-ah, ah, ah-ah-ah-ah

# And the boys... #

Once a girl named Emerald, Arin is now a 16-year-old boy.

Luke became Katie, now an 18-year-old woman.

It's become so normal for me to be a woman.

You know, to be a normal woman, in everyday life.

I've always loved women and liked women, even as a female,

because I've always deep down known that I was a straight male.

Arin and Katie's online video blogs

are inspiring other young transgender people

to talk openly about love.

Claire is searching for Mr Right.

I would just like someone to spend time with, and to cuddle,

and just do little things, like...

the little things mean the most to me.

Devon is the new kid in town and he wants a girlfriend.

It's a little bit difficult in the dating scene

because I don't really know anybody and nobody really knows me.

Arin and Katie, Claire, Devon are part of a new generation

telling the world what it's like to be...

It's not easy dating when you're transgender.

It's so embarrassing to admit,

but I do, I get stood up all the time and it's so annoying!

You're changing completely.

My sex drive has gone up a lot.

Like, a lot.

Sharing these experiences online helps others to understand.

And giving them hope that they're not alone.

I have met a lot of douchebags and jerks,

and I would really, really want to meet a gentleman.

Arin Andrews and Katie Hill

are pioneers in the transgender blogosphere,

first appearing online as a couple in 2012.

They met at a transgender support group in Oklahoma.

I went up to her, kind of with my iPhone,

I was like, "Hey, can I have your number?" kind of thing

and she was like, "Yeah, sure, I'll give you my number"

and I was like, "Oh, I bet she doesn't really...you know, like me."

But she did like him and their unique love soon blossomed.

We were watching, just, TV, and we were laying down

and I was pretty much like this to him, cuddled close,

and finally, for the first time ever, he put his arm around me.

I said, "This is nonsense,

"I'm going to do it if he's not going to do it."

-And so...

-Aw, man.

..I had to go in for the first kiss.

I was sitting here, like, thinking,

"I'm kissing the most beautiful girl in the world...

"The most amazing woman I know."

Over the years, Arin and Katie's posts online

have had a major impact on the lives of other young trans adults,

who felt isolated, confused, and had nowhere to turn.

There was kind of a moment of like...

"OK, this is what I am."

Cos, like, when I found other trans people...

..and, like, when they would tell their stories and how they felt,

I was like, "Oh, my gosh, this is what I am."

Claire is 20 now.

Just nine months ago, she came out online as transgender.

I have finally made the decision to fully transition.

When I look back at old pictures and videos,

it's like looking at a completely different person.

Not even physical-wise,

I feel like my inside changed too, like, the way I felt about things.

Yeah, I was very depressed back then.

Just a lot of things I was unhappy with.

Social media not only gave Claire an outlet for her depression,

it helped her find friends who supported her.

I've had a lot of issues with dating and with men.

I personally want to date a straight man,

I don't want a man who wants me for the person that I was,

I want a man who wants me for the woman that I am.

My friend Oliviah,

she taught me a lot, actually, about, like, things I needed to do.

-I had to, like, basically make you into, like, a new person!

-BOTH LAUGH

-It's been about a year now. That's crazy.

-I know...

One of the first lessons Oliviah taught Claire

was one of the most important - how to disguise that telltale bulge.

I mean, basically, you just...

..pull everything back!

You tuck some of that...

Yeah, I mean, your testicle... Male testicles have a, um, socket.

You put them back in there and you pull everything, like, way back

and then it's flat!

And then, you put underwear on.

And, yeah, you just put on a pair of tight underwear.

-Yeah...

-Yeah. All right. You ready?

-Yeah, I'm ready.

-D'you wanna go? OK.

The girls head into town, ready for a big night out.

# This is the part when I break free

# Cos I can't resist it no more-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh... #

And Claire's hoping to rev up her love life.

Yeah, we're going to, like... go out, enjoy ourselves,

dance with some guys, get you a guy...

it's going to be awesome.

They meet up with another trans friend, Zoey, and hit a local club.

# You were better... #

Plenty of men on the dance floor, will the girls get lucky?

# I was under your spell

# Like a deadly

# Fever, yeah, babe

# On the highway to hell, yeah... #

They came, they saw...

but they left by themselves.

That was so fun.

Many trans women run into a common problem with men.

I feel, like, guys just tend to sexualise us.

They don't see, like, what we have to offer past the bedroom.

You know, if we weren't transgender,

we would get those second and third dates no...no problem.

I have been with a few guys, like, physically, and...

I feel like once...

..they got down there, I kind of just shut off.

I've been sexual with my boyfriend, obviously, but...

he's fine with it and he's accepted it.

Um, he's completely straight and everything like that,

but he's accepted it, and he's like me, he wants to please people,

so it doesn't bother him.

Gotcha.

Most guys I've met, I meet them one time, literally.

And then, after that, nothing.

There's someone out there for you, like, it's going to happen.

I've never had, like, an actual relationship and it's...

kind of odd to me, like, how?

Like, I don't know why, like, what is the issue?

Is it me?

Claire has just joined the conversation online.

Others began posting videos when they were younger.

Hi, my name is Brittney and I am 16 years old,

and I'm transgender.

Arin's posts date back to before his relationship with Katie,

from the very beginning of his transgender journey.

This is the beginning, this is the very start of my transition.

As you can see, I finally got my hair cut. Yes!

Haircuts are good.

From 14 and up, Arin told his story on social media.

I have changed as a person emotionally, physically,

spiritually, everything.

Everything about me has changed and I love it.

And his vlogs had a major impact on teens coming out as trans,

including Devon.

Now 18, Devon followed Arin's lead by sharing his own transition.

I was so goofy back then, though.

So goofy, my voice is so high-pitched and I...

I remember, like,

talking about silly things.

Um, so I'm using this site, it's called Laura's Playground.

I saw my best friend's underwear today.

Yep, pretty sexy.

I'm a man! Like, physically, no.

But look at this, what d'you see?

MAN.

I'm more man than Justin Bieber.

But growing up trans is not just frustrating, it can be painful too.

And in high school, Devon became a target.

I was shoved into lockers, shoved into walls

and this kid came up to me and he was really upset,

and put me in a chokehold and he said he was going to...

He said, "I'm going to fucking kill you, faggot."

Um, and that was kind of the turning point in my life

and in my mom's life.

A turning point that changed Devon and his mum's life forever

and forced them to move away from their old home in Iowa.

I love photos, but it just... It's so emotional.

-Yeah.

-You know.

Yeah, I feel you.

Here's aged three.

That's when... when everything changed.

I mean, I just cut your hair off,

you wouldn't let me do anything with it, so I'm like,

"OK, we'll just cut it off, then we don't have to fight about it."

-Hm.

-This was really tough for me, right here.

When you hit, like, 12 and 13

and that's when it got really bad for me, I fought it.

I didn't want you to...

You know, your life to be any harder than it had to be.

I remember the endless conversations of you saying,

"Devon you have to start wearing girl clothes

"and then you can be such a beautiful girl."

-Mm-hm.

-And I remember forcing myself to say,

"Yeah, you're right, I could be."

-I didn't understand what was going on with you.

-Mm.

-Sometimes I thought you were just being obstinate.

-Mm-hm.

People are looking at you and then they're asking me questions,

I mean, right in your face - "Is that a boy or a girl?" -

it's like...

You just... I just sometimes wanted it just to be easier.

But don't you think that's kind of how I feel?

Don't you think I feel like, "God, couldn't this just be easier?"

I love you, baby.

'I don't think at all'

that being transgender is a choice cos thinking on it, why would you...

Why would somebody want this kind of life?

Why would somebody want to, um, put themselves through all this pain?

Devon's hoping that a change of scenery

will help kick-start his social life and find him a girlfriend.

Moving to a whole entire new state and not really knowing anybody,

that's kind of scary...

Trying to find a new group of friends where you...

you know, feel like home when you hang out with them.

He's hooking up with some skater buddies

who already know that he's trans.

So what's it like moving here from Iowa?

Do you like it better or...?

I don't know, it's beautiful here. There's, like, a lot of trees.

-In Iowa, all we have is, like, cornfields and stuff!

-LAUGHTER

How d'you like the chick scene around here compared to Iowa?

They're pretty hot, you know.

You've talked about your ex-girlfriend a couple of times,

but you never go into too much detail on it.

Um, there's this girl named Rebecca...

She kind of dropped the "I'm in love with you" card.

-Ooh!

-I kind of handled it wrong.

Cos I just, like, kind of stopped talking to her for a little bit.

-Been there.

-Yeah.

Leaving Iowa, I did leave a big broken heart

with this girl named Rebecca,

but I felt really overwhelmed and I wasn't ready for what was there.

So, are you looking for a girl around here, or, like,

anything serious like that?

I think what I'm looking for is

somebody who's fun and exciting, who can, like,

be as energetic as I can, you know?

Someone to go out and do things with?

-Yeah, exactly. To chill, you know?

-Yeah.

As Devon is the new kid in town,

his buddies have invited a couple of girls they want him to meet.

Kels!

-How are you?

-Good, how are you doing?

-Hey.

-Just skating.

-Yeah, what are you guys doing here?

-Taking a break.

-Have you guys met Devon before?

-Aw, no!

-Hey, I'm Devon.

-Hi, Devon.

-I'm Syd.

Nice to meet you.

-I'm Kelsie.

-Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you too.

-Where are you from?

-I'm from Iowa.

What kind of music are you guys into?

Alternative punk, I guess... Uh, a little bit of everything.

-Like hardcore.

-Some hardcore and pop punk music.

We're both really into, I guess, the local scene.

I mean, if you're not doing anything on Saturday,

I mean, there's a really cool show, so, you should stop by.

Yeah, that actually sounds pretty fun, I might do that.

I think I've definitely got a lot in common with Kelsie,

I think we kind of connected a little bit

and I'd like to see kind of where that goes with her.

It's the first time Devon has felt a connection

since splitting up with his ex.

But it's too soon for Devon to tell Kelsie

that he was once a girl named Addison.

-OLIVIAH:

-When you are transgender, you are...

Young trans Americans are not only sharing posts about their feelings,

they're also sharing updates

about the medical challenges of becoming trans.

I have testosterone, which makes you go through the roof.

And the first step to change your gender

is to take hormones.

Arin started taking testosterone, or T, when he was 15,

sharing the momentous occasion on social media.

And there's my first shot.

Today is my first day on T.

Um, I feel like a new man.

Basically, I was pretty much born today.

Ouch.

-This is the part that hurts, yeah.

-Does it sting?

He also shared how T was affecting him,

updating his vlog to show each change as it happened.

I've got like...

..a moustache, if you can see it.

Here's my arms... They're getting there.

I got a lot of hair right here.

Quite a bit of a happy trail going all the way up.

Sideburns... I don't know if you can see the hair on that.

My Adam's apple, I don't know if you guys can see it,

but it's frickin' huge, like...

T even affects the shape of female genitals.

Downstairs... is, like, two and a half inches.

And for you trans guys out there that know what that's like,

it's kind of crazy.

Nothing looks like normal biological female any more.

As these changes made Arin more of a man,

he turned his back on Emerald, the reluctant pageant queen.

These are all my beauty pageant trophies

that I won a long time ago, before I started transitioning.

That's my past.

Until aged 12, when he, then still a she, had had enough.

What male wants to be in beauty pageants?

I was a guy in a dress.

So I just wanted to, you know, get rid of them,

so I just took them out of my room and threw them in here,

cos they don't mean much to me.

Just a bunch of crap, basically.

Whilst Arin's mum was supportive,

she struggled to let go of the daughter she used to have.

I always get so emotional, I, I...

This was the Emerald I knew. I mean, this is what I've always known.

This was, like, a huge part of her life and...

all of her...her dance costumes, I've saved them every year.

I haven't gotten rid of them.

He looked so cute in this one, oh!

It's adorable.

I still want to say "she" because I hang on to that.

The girl I had. It's kind of like when someone dies...

you still want to, I guess, honour that.

I don't know, it's just really hard.

Um, but "she" just sounds better

when you're talking about her dance costumes...

So...sorry!

Hey, Mom, can you come help me, real quick?

Sure.

OK.

Devon's mum injects him with T once a week.

Using it means that he will NEVER be able to have children.

I had periods up until I was 16 when I started testosterone.

And it took about...

..maybe two to three months for them to stop.

But one side effect took Devon by surprise.

Being on testosterone definitely raises your sex drive.

'I heard that!'

-Yeah, I know!

-LAUGHTER

-No, Mom, it doesn't make me horny!

-'Uh-huh.'

Whilst Arin and Devon need testosterone injected

to maintain their transition,

Claire's body still produces the male hormone naturally.

I am taking...four pills a day...

Spironolactone, which is...

Basically, it blocks the testosterone,

so I won't get any manlier, praise Jesus.

And then I'm on oestrogens.

When I first started taking the oestrogen, my...

and hormones, my emotions were kind of like at a high as a female.

Cos I wanted to cry before, as a guy.

I actually was frustrated that I could never cry.

Before she started taking hormones,

Claire used to be an all-American boy named Dylan,

growing up in a small town in Virginia.

My neighbour's probably looking at me, like,

"When did they get a daughter?"

Despite Claire's small town upbringing,

her family have tried their best to support her.

It's just hard cos everybody has been calling you "Dylan" and "he,"

like, their whole life and then,

like, this past year everything's changed,

so it's kind of different.

The hardest thing for me is getting used to saying "she".

Like, when people mess up, like... pronouns and stuff,

it kind of just, like... really upsets me.

It kind of, like, wants to make me cry.

Claire's mum has been on her side from the start.

I've-I've seen your tears, I've been there...

through this whole process.

I know what you've been going through.

Well, let me ask you this - what kind of guy do you see me with?

I think you just have to see.

You just have to... I mean, this is still, you know,

you're still learning.

It's just a learning process.

You're going to make mistakes, you just learn from your mistakes.

And see what's good for you.

Whitney, what kind of guy should I date?

WHITNEY BABBLES, LAUGHTER

When I came out as transgender,

my mom's side of the family accepted it.

Then there was my dad's side that, like, completely didn't accept it.

They think it's, like, a super-big sin.

And, like, I'm an abomination.

Like, that's what my dad told me I was.

He called me once I came out as trans.

Told me that everyone thought I was an abomination.

It's Saturday night...

and Devon has been waiting all week

to see the girl he met at the skate park, Kelsie.

-How are you doing?

-Good, good. How are you?

Thanks for inviting me to the show.

-Yeah.

-It looks pretty cool. It's outside, that's dope.

I know, yeah, it's been pretty cool so far.

-Awesome, did I miss much?

-Kind of.

-You ready to watch?

-Yes.

Cool.

LOUD MUSIC PLAYS Devon wants to wait to tell Kelsie he's trans.

She seems into him, but he has been rejected in the past.

Recently, this girl and me went on a date and everything was fine.

Um, and then I felt the need to kind of tell her that I was transgender.

I remember her...her saying, "Nah, dude, I like guys."

And I was like..."OK."

That kind of hit hard, I was like, "But I am a guy."

And she's like, "Yeah, but you're not."

ROCK MUSIC PLAYS

-BAND MEMBER:

-'Yeah!'

-CHEERING

'I love you guys!'

The last band actually was really, really good, honestly.

I definitely could have, like, danced and grooved to them, you know what I'm saying?

Yeah, no, they're really good, I like them.

Since you kind of showed me, like, what you're into, I write a lot,

um, so I was wondering if you kind of want to go to this poetry slam with me?

-Yeah.

-Yeah?

-Yeah, that'd be super cool.

-Cool, awesome.

-That'd be super cool, I've never been to one.

-Sweet.

But telling Kelsie he's trans is not the only thing on Devon's mind.

His ex-girlfriend, Rebecca, has been in contact

to say that she still has feelings for him.

Devon's moved on, though.

He doesn't want a long-distance relationship

and feels he must go back to Iowa to tell her in person.

Rebecca understands, you know, like that I'm here

and the distance is hard.

I definitely think it'd be good to...

To see her and talk to her

and kind of talk in person cos over phone and text message

you can't kind of get that reaction

of the other person's face instantly, you know?

After nine months on hormones,

Claire is about to take a major step on her trans journey.

It's a big day today because it's the first time I...

..have ever been to the beach as Claire and it's like...

I don't know how to feel about it.

Like, I'm really excited, but at the same time I think...

not nervous, but I don't know what to expect.

-Hi!

-GIRLS:

-Hey!

Claire and her friends

want to see if they can meet some hot guys at the beach.

I'm excited!

I mean, there's probably a lot of cute guys out today.

-I feel like just scope out the area.

-Yeah, looking is always fun.

It's the first time Claire has worn a bikini in public.

# If you gave me a chance I would take it

# It's a shot in the dark but I'll make it... #

And the guys seem to be paying attention.

# ..You can't shake me... #

Good, how are you?

-Zoey.

-Zoey? I'm Casey.

-I'm Mike, nice to meet you.

-I'm Claire.

-GUYS:

-Nice to meet you.

What kind of guys are you ladies into?

Do you like the blond surfer kind of guy? Skater dude?

Like, is it personality that gets you or is it like...?

-Yeah, definitely.

-Definitely personality?

Yeah, if a guy is, like, really funny and makes me laugh

and I can, like, be comfortable around him, it's a plus.

So not to be like forward or anything but, like...

do you think we're cute?

-Most definitely.

-Really?

Gorgeous. I think you ladies are gorgeous.

-MIKE: We should hook up sometime, hang out, you know?

-Really?

-Yeah.

-Heck, yeah.

-We'll always be here.

-You need to, like, get our numbers.

Sure thing.

So, do I just put you in here as "Beautiful"?

LAUGHTER

-Of course, yeah.

-OK.

Bye.

But when the guys found out the girls were trans, things changed.

That's it, silence. Like nothing from them again.

In a lot of ways, I don't like telling a guy

because once I tell him, it's, like, all respect goes out the window.

Straight guys just can't get over you having the male parts.

Once I had or get the surgery, I think it will change a lot for me

because right now, you know, if I meet a straight guy

and he doesn't know, like, you know, we can't get physical.

If I don't tell him, like, and then if he finds out, like...

Just things get so complicated that you don't even begin to...

I can't even, yeah, begin to explain.

Claire is considering getting surgery

so that guys will accept her fully as a woman.

-Hi, Claire, how are you?

-Hi...

What I'd like to do is just get a sense of what you feel

would be the amount that you would want.

Claire wants three procedures - first, a boob job.

See now that, that's getting up into a full C cup

and I think that might be a little bit more difficult to fit.

You may not have enough skin to fit an implant that's too large.

Then she wants her Adam's apple shaved.

What we would do is basically just shave off a little piece

on either side here...

But the third surgery is risky and highly invasive

and the hardest for Claire to decide on.

We can make, for example, a vagina for you.

Uh, we use the skin from the inside of your thighs...

-Oh.

-..and we create, like, a tunnel.

Uh, sometimes we can just use them up in your groin area, here,

so you don't quite see it all the way down on your,

-on your thighs area.

-Scars?

Scars are higher up.

-Plus, you'd have to have your penis resected.

-Mm.

And, um, what we try to do sometimes is save some of the...

the sensation, the nerve sensations.

-Yeah, yeah...

-But, um, you know, again,

that would never quite be as sensitive as...

-Before.

-..before.

-I don't want the feeling to go away...

-Yeah, yeah.

..and never have feeling down there again.

Right. If you ever wanted to have, you know, somebody penetrate...

-Uh-huh.

-..then you would have to have something inside,

kind of keeping that skin from contracting,

until it had a chance to fully heal.

It's a big step, there's no doubt about that.

-It's a big step.

-And I have to be prepared fully for it.

-Yes, yes.

-Mentally and, like, physically.

-Absolutely.

As Claire considers this drastic next step,

she turns to Arin and Katie's vlogs for help.

Ah! I'm only three days away with the surgery and I'm so excited!

This is a big, big, big... big deal!

For all of y'all who are transgender or in the community,

you know that having surgery is a very life-changing event.

Three years ago,

Arin and Katie shared the mental and physical highs and lows

of their own surgical transition, with millions online.

Katie was the first to have surgery.

I'm on my way to the waiting room to get my surgery.

It's in two hours and 14 minutes and counting.

I'm sitting here kind of... a little worried

because the surgery's about four hours long...

Katie's bottom surgery

meant that her penis was fashioned into a vagina and clitoris

and her testicles were cut off.

It hurts... It hurts so badly and...

I miss you...

Despite the immense pain, Katie felt freer.

Inside I'm crying, I'm just so happy.

SHE SNIFFLES

It's very key for your personality.

You have to, you know, be a strong person

and if you're not, then you... transitioning is not for you.

Claire feels stronger knowing that Katie has done

what SHE someday hopes to do.

If Katie Hill can get gender reassignment surgery,

then so can I and so can you.

In the vlogosphere,

Devon still has his ex, Rebecca, on his mind.

I guess to start out, I had dated this girl, um, for a while,

but she...really made me kind of comfortable in my own skin

cos she really appreciated, like, my body and, like,

didn't see anything wrong with it,

which was kind of like a first that I'd ever experienced.

Rebecca's been in contact with Devon to say that she loves him.

For Devon, the relationship is over,

so he's driving to his old town in Iowa for a heart-to-heart.

I think if she asks about Kelsie, I'll...

I'll definitely, I won't lie to her or anything.

But I don't think that's something

that I would just choose to talk about

because I know that if I did, that would hurt her.

Rebecca is part of a group of close friends Devon left behind in Iowa,

so visiting gives him the perfect chance to catch up with the gang.

LAUGHTER

SHE LAUGHS

Aah!

But he needs to clarify his feelings with Rebecca.

Obviously, I liked you.

Just cos you used to do some things

that, like, frickin' movie people do.

What are these movie things that I did?

Like...on my way back from youth group.

That was the first time you pulled a move on me.

-LAUGHING:

-In the back of my grandma's car!

What was the move?

You leaned in to kiss me, and then we started kissing...

One thing led to another...

Kind of explored each other's bodies a bit!

SHE LAUGHS

It's just...really easy to...

fall in love with you, so...

I don't want that, it's not what I want.

You're a cool person...

Like, I don't know. I don't like you in that way.

Having this conversation today and it not going as well as planned,

I think it makes it a little bit clearer that Iowa

and Rebecca is in the past

and the future in Minnesota holds Kelsie and...seeing where that goes.

BELL JINGLES

After being rejected at the beach, Claire has called in BFF Oliviah

to spruce up her online dating profile.

So, what dating apps are you using?

Well, I've been using OkCupid...

What should I say, I'm trans?

Is that something you're comfortable with saying?

-Yeah.

-OK.

-Transgender...

-Just kind of add it in there...

Do you consider yourself straight or bisexual?

-I'm straight.

-Straight. OK.

So your self-summary says,

"If you want to know more about me, message me," really?

-Well, yeah!

-Who are you? Who is Claire?

Claire is a kind person.

Kind and genuine.

Claire has found an online profile of someone she fancies.

His name is Jason.

-Oh, yeah? Is this him?

-Yeah.

Ooh!

In his profile, Jason has listed he's open to dating anyone,

no matter what sexuality or gender.

-He's just, like, perfect.

-He's perfect?

-Yeah.

-Well, have you ever, like, tried talking to him?

Not really. Um, I'm just kind of scared, you know what I mean?

-Like, of like...

-Why are you scared? What pushes you back?

Rejection.

Why don't you message him?

Just say, "I'd like the chance to get to know you," and then just...

-Send it.

-Send it, yeah.

-Did it.

-All done! Yay!

Being single and confused about your gender can be traumatic.

When you're transgender, it is very easy to feel unlovable and like,

you will not be able to find someone who will be accepting of you...

Before he found love with Katie, Arin's vlogs tell a different story,

one that was almost too hard to share.

A year ago, I actually tried to commit suicide.

You know, you get to that point when you're just like, "I give up".

Arin felt so much shame about being trans

that he couldn't even show his face whilst sharing his feelings.

And he's not alone.

Nearly half of all transgender teens

attempt suicide.

Using his experiences, Arin wanted to share a message of hope.

You know, it's just like one of those moments in life

that is insane and...

and then I look back and I'm like, "Well, look at me.

"I'm on testosterone, my hair is short,

"I have the most amazing and beautiful girlfriend

"that I could ever ask for and my life's just incredible."

Never give up, guys. I promise you it gets better.

Devon almost ended it all too.

Until he found Arin's YouTube videos.

When I was younger I saw a few of Arin's videos.

Watching his videos definitely made me feel like

I wasn't all alone, that I wasn't all by myself.

It was... "This is OK, me being transgender,

"and there's other folks out there

"who feel exactly the same way that I feel."

'I'm determined to be, you know, that man I always saw myself as.'

Arin's ambition to get surgery inspired Devon in particular.

'These changes that I've been telling you guys

'are one of the most important things and factors

'in my life right now, especially my chest...'

With his vlog, Arin wanted to inspire and reassure

other trans teens going through the same thing.

I'm super, super excited, you know. Top surgery's tomorrow!

Like, I thought I'd never be able to say that.

Next time you see me,

I will never have these wonderful thingies any more.

Nope, they're going to be gone.

Yeah, I'll see you when I'm boobless.

After Katie's surgery, it's now Arin's turn to go under the knife.

Uh, blade...

Surgeons performed a double mastectomy

to remove his breast tissue.

He needed time to recover, but as soon as he did, he was back online.

I'm starting to feel it now. I got my drain tubes and stuff.

It's pretty much all I can see, but I'm so happy to be flat-chested.

And he couldn't wait to send a video to Katie too.

Hey, baby.

I just wanted to send you a video and tell you that I love you.

I love you.

Back in Oklahoma, Katie was eager to see the new Arin.

More than anything, I just missed him when he was gone.

I understand Arin probably better than anybody else.

I think that bond that we have, it is...it's unbreakable.

He felt like he was ready, just like how I was ready for my surgery.

CAR ALARM SETTING BLEEPS

-Hey!

-Hey, baby!

-BOTH:

-Hey!

-How're you feeling?

-I'm a little sore, but...it's all good.

-Oh, wow!

-I've still got some scar tissue round my nipple

and here, but... it's starting to go away

and this side is my better side.

You look good. He did a really good job.

It's kind of empowering, you know?

Seeing him without a shirt on

and seeing that he really doesn't have any scars

is really cool and kind of gives me hope.

Arin has inspired Devon to take the plunge

and to book an appointment to talk about surgery.

I think after having top surgery

I'll definitely feel a lot more comfortable around girls

and, um, kind of getting into the intimate part of being with girls.

I've only been comfortable sharing my body completely,

like, fully naked, with one girl, um, ever before in my life.

Claire's new online profile has got a response.

She calls up best friend, Oliviah, to dish.

Hey!

'Hey, how's it going?'

Good... Oh, my gosh, guess who just messaged me?

'Who?'

Jason.

'Really?'

Well, he said that he wants to go on a date.

'Good!'

Hopefully I get a kiss!

-Hi, Claire!

-Hi!

-You ready for your appointment?

-Yes.

-We'll be with you in a minute.

-OK, thank you.

But before any kissing,

Claire wants to make sure her skin is stubble-free.

Like, less than a year ago, I had a full-on beard.

Like, full-on. Like, thick.

Had to shave, like...

twice a day.

I would never wish...

for a woman to go through this.

AIR GUSHES FROM INSTRUMENT, MACHINE BLEEPS

-How're you doing?

-Good, I'm fine.

Great.

Claire undergoes laser treatments, monthly,

to kill the hair follicles in her face.

OK, we're going to do a little bit on your upper lip...

That's, like, the worst.

-That's the worst part, I know.

-Yeah...

Beautiful.

All right, Claire... We made it!

It's looking great.

-Good?

-Yep, we're good.

-Hey, Claire, it looks really good.

-Thank you.

I'm so excited...

I can't believe it's only been less than a year since we started.

It's very important for my skin to be smooth,

just cos, like, I'm going on a date and I don't want any stubble!

-Abso...

-That would be...not good.

-Yeah.

-Just in case, like, he kisses me or something...

-There's women that would die for your skin, so...

-Thank you.

Yeah, absolutely. So, yeah, just keep doing what you're doing.

I think we're well on our way to being done with this part

of your journey.

Hair was just a big thing... Like, I hated it.

Having to, like, shave!

Imagine being a woman, growing a beard.

That's how it felt.

Inspired by Arin,

Devon follows up with a doctor, who specialises in transgender medicine.

What's it feel like, I mean... to have the breasts?

It'd be lovely to get them off so I can do some stuff, like swimming,

and hang out with the guys and have no questions asked about it.

You want to have your plan in place by October to have surgery when?

-As soon as we can.

-OK!

-BOTH LAUGH

-A soon as the money's there and we have a date, you know?

-OK.

Top surgery costs at least £6,000.

But Devon wants to go one step further than Arin

and have bottom surgery, building a penis from a graft of his skin.

This can cost almost ten times as much.

So for YOU, what you would want would be a functional penis.

-Yeah.

-I mean, that you can pee through...

-Yeah.

-..that would get an erection when you get excited...

-Yeah.

-..and be able to, uh, perform sexually.

-Yeah.

-And that's kind of what you want.

Mm-hm.

Cool.

Until he can have the surgery he wants, Devon has to improvise.

"Packing" is the transgender term for...

you know, I would basically say just putting anything in your pants

to kind of give you that shape and that oomph of having a penis.

DEVON MUTTERS TO HIMSELF

It makes me feel more myself, more of what I want in my body.

If medicine was advanced,

I would definitely hop on board of the train of getting, um, a penis.

I don't want to die a female.

The best advice I could give somebody, um, is that...

be confident in who you are and if somebody doesn't agree with that...

..then, you know, you don't deserve that.

Thanks to the internet,

many in the transgender community have new-found confidence.

Do you see this shirt?

It says, "Transgender Woman".

This movement is real, yo...

Arin vlogs about the physical effects of surgery and how he feels.

These are my nipples, they're, um...

I got some scar tissue right here, but it's nothing horribly bad.

And this is my other nipple. This is my better side.

I mean, I can't even tell you how happy I am with my results

and just finally being able to go to the lake now and be shirtless.

He and Katie were ready to spend their summer at the lake...

confident that their post-surgery bodies had finally got them

to where they'd always wanted to be.

I don't think anyone, unless they know our story,

actually would come to the conclusion

-that we're trans-man, trans-woman dating.

-Yeah.

They would just see us as a boy and a girl dating.

The news media picked up on their story.

It was a whole new level of exposure.

-REPORTER:

-'Now a month after surgery,

'Arin is ready to reveal his new manly chest.

'Off comes his shirt. Katie couldn't be more impressed.'

Fantastic.

I can stick my chest out

and just be happy with who I am and confident about it.

I feel amazing.

As their fame grew, so did their following.

The golden couple were having the time of their lives.

Alone together...

..with nine million people watching them online.

For Claire, it's the moment she's been prepping for...

a date with her online crush, Jason.

Jason has read Claire's online dating profile

and already knows she's transgender.

I'm feeling really, really excited.

We've been talking online for a little while and...

yeah, like, he just seems like a really, really good guy.

-Hi! I'm here to meet Jason.

-Right!

Right this way, please.

-Hi!

-Hey, how are you?

Good to see you.

-Nice to meet you.

-Nice to meet you too.

You're so handsome.

-LAUGHING:

-Well, thanks, you look very nice yourself.

D'you find it OK?

It was a little hard to find, to be honest,

cos it's, like, literally in an alley.

That's why it's called The Alley Light.

-JASON LAUGHS

-Whatever.

-Here are your cocktail menus...

-Thank you, thank you.

-I'll be back in just two minutes.

-Oh, is this the goat cheese?

-This is the green beans with the frozen foie gras.

-Oh!

-Thank you!

-You're welcome.

-Thank you so much.

I just really need to know, like...

What kinda... What type do you like?

If you look at pictures of the people that I've dated,

it would be really hard to find, like, a pattern or a type.

I really like kind eyes and a genuine smile,

but aside from that,

I don't look at anything physical when it comes to anybody.

Your type is really just, like, a genuine person?

Yeah. Like I said, open to anybody.

Have you ever, and answer this question honestly...

-Uh-huh.

-Have you ever, and would you ever...

..be with a trans person?

No, and sure.

-No, and sure...

-Yeah.

-..what does that mean?

-No - I haven't ever been with a trans person.

-Oh, OK.

I have never been, like, out dating, you know, a trans person.

And, sure, why not?

-When it comes to physical contact...

-Yep.

..when do you get intimate and stuff like that, like, how soon?

Uh, when the time is right.

I don't think there's a timetable for it, I really don't.

-You don't really rush it?

-No, definitely not.

-It's not, like, the first thing on your mind?

-No.

Typically, I do hold off for quite a while

before I have any sort of physical contact with somebody.

-That is, like, baffling to me.

-Why is that baffling to you?

Because there's so many guys that...

-..that's all that's on their mind.

-Mm-hm.

-Like, literally.

-Mm-hm.

Jason has ticked all the boxes.

But will Claire get the kiss her cheeks are ready for?

-It's been a nice night.

-Well, I'm heading out.

-I'm an old man, need to go to bed. Mm!

-Text me, call me.

-Will see you later, OK?

-Bye.

Bye.

I really, really think Jason is...

..boyfriend material?

But that's too early to say!

But I really, really like him a lot.

Devon is preparing for his date...

but Kelsie still doesn't know that he's trans.

So, tonight, he needs his mum's advice on a poem with a purpose.

-Kelsie, that cute girl that I saw at the skate park...

-Mm-hm.

I saw her at the show and we kind of made a little connection

and I invited her to this poetry slam,

which is the reason why I'm kind of writing this to...

kind of tell her that I'm trans.

-What d'you think about that?

-I just don't think this is a good idea.

-It's kind of like dropping a bomb on someone.

-Yeah.

I'm kind of putting myself in her shoes

and even if I was very supportive and an ally, I'd be like,

-"Whoa, dude, did you really?!"

-Yeah.

She could take it wrong and not know what to do, you know?

She'll, like, bail, or, like, you know, just chill there.

I mean, she could take it really well.

I think if at all possible, Devon,

-if you can have a little time with her before this...

-Mm-hm...

..and just let her know then.

D'you know what I'm saying?

Yeah, I know what you're saying. I feel you.

The next day, Devon thinks about WHEN he should tell Kelsie the truth.

There's a lot of anxiety of telling people that I'm transgender

and especially new people, telling them, it's...

Cos, I mean, you can have, like, a really nice person

who completely loves you for who you are,

but then they can completely turn their back around you

when you bring this up.

Cos it is such a complex thing to think about.

That evening, Devon has finally made up his mind

to tell Kelsie that he's transgender.

But he's decided to tell her in private.

The following afternoon,

Devon waits to see if Kelsie is going to turn up to meet him.

I'm not too open about, you know, being trans with new faces,

new people.

A lot of nerves kind of running through my body right now.

But Kelsie does come and Devon has a chance to talk things through.

-Hey!

-Hey!

-How are you?

-Good.

-Could we take a seat and talk for a sec?

-Yeah. Of course.

-Yeah, are you nervous?

-Yeah, extremely nervous.

So, I felt like before anything kind of got a little serious between us

that I should tell you that.

-Does that surprise you in any way?

-I mean, honestly, yeah.

Like I-I guess I wouldn't have known if you didn't tell me.

Um... But like I said, like - there's nothing wrong, so I mean...

Yeah, but I... I honestly wouldn't have guessed, but...

The reason kind of why I told you that

and why I'm kind of nervous about this whole thing

is cos of the poem...

-The poem that I wrote is trans-related and it kind of...

-Oh.

It ties in with all of that and I just, you know,

wanted to tell you beforehand, before I, like,

sideswiped you with a...

-Yeah, yeah, no, that... Thank you for telling me before.

-..The poem.

-You ready to go in?

-Yeah, I am.

Cool.

-WOMAN:

-'Welcome to the ReVerb Open Mic, how's everybody doing tonight?'

-ALL:

-'Good!'

'It's good to see you.'

-Please make some noise for Devon.

-AUDIENCE:

-Whoo!

Hey, guys, my name's Devon. Um, I'm transgender.

I'm kind of new to Minnesota -

I just moved from Iowa about four months ago.

This is my first time actually sharing my piece with somebody.

Oh, man.

Please don't ask me why I'm way too into girls.

Please don't ask me why I hold back.

Please don't ask me why I always make my voice deeper

when I meet somebody new.

Please don't ask me why I'm constantly adjusting my clothes.

But ask me why I wear my heart on my sleeve.

Please don't ask me

why I always have to use the stall in the bathroom.

Ask me why I'm so accepting.

Please don't ask me why I have two names.

Ask me why I'm so strong-willed.

-AUDIENCE MEMBER:

-Whoo!

I think your... Your piece was so good. I really liked it.

-HE LAUGHS

-Thank you.

There's definitely some changes I could definitely do, and also,

to be honest with you, having you there made me a little bit nervous.

Why were you nervous cos I was there?

Cos I didn't know how you would react to...

To, you know, little Dev going up there with a big voice and like,

you know, uh, being passionate and really loud about things.

-But also, like, you're cute so...

-DEVON LAUGHS

You know, that's going to make anybody really nervous,

having a cute girl out in the crowd.

Do you think, maybe possibly, we could, like, go on a formal date?

-Yeah! I would really like that.

-Awesome.

Yeah.

I feel like I could tell Kelsie a little bit sooner

than I typically would tell somebody who's...

because knowing her only for a short amount of time,

she's really found interest in me

and a connection has definitely been made.

But I do feel kind of iffy about...

about how she feels and, um,

I feel like she definitely still has a lot of questions.

Claire has the first second date of her life.

But on her way out the door... a top-up.

It's good to take oestrogen right before a date cos...

..I think it does give me a confidence boost,

it makes me feel more feminine.

It's time for Claire to find out if Jason

is truly boyfriend material.

My mission is to...get Jason.

That's my mission.

And she's pulling out all the stops.

The last date we had, he smelt really good.

So I wanna, like, outdo him a little bit.

-How are you?

-Good, how are you?

-Good to see you.

-How are you?

Good! Come on in!

-I LOVE to eat.

-This is so good!

BOTH LAUGH

All right, you can pop open the oven

cos I'm covered in chicken juice.

OVEN BLEEPS

What about you, do you think people are attracted to?

Or what attracts people to you?

-There's more to me than just...

-Mm-hm.

..the outward appearance, you know?

And I've, like, endured a lot in my life.

Just, like, figuring out who I am.

I think if there was one thing

that I would want people to know about me,

it's...my journey.

Well, for a long time I just...

-..put myself down...

-Right.

..and now I'm accepting myself and who I am

and it's OK to be transgender.

Claire takes a moment to powder her nose and settle her nerves.

One - I don't want to put pressure on anything.

But two - I do want to see where I kind of stand with this.

He's a glass of...

..a very expensive wine, or whatever you want to call it,

but I've been drinking...

..Dr Pepper.

-Jason?

-SHE LAUGHS

I don't know how to ask you this question!

Um, you just ask me right out.

-How do you feel about me?

-How do I feel about you?

Um, I think that we have learned a lot from each other

because I'm still kind of finding myself.

What are you finding out?

I find out something new about myself every day!

Would you, like, ever consider yourself, like, being with me,

on an emotional level

and, like, romance level?

I don't think that the best way for me to support you right now

is as a romantic endeavour, or as a romantic partner,

I think the best way for me to support you right now is just,

is simply to support you.

Um, and I don't know that I feel comfortable

adding the aspect of romanticism.

I was just hoping like it could lead somewhere maybe.

I do appreciate that you told me in a nice way.

Not sort of being like, "Well, I don't like you!"

-Yeah.

-Yeah. Thank you for that.

Have a good night. Do be safe getting home, OK?

-I'll try.

-All right. We'll chat soon.

-OK, bye.

-Bye.

SHE SNIFFLES

Oh, gosh.

I don't know, I don't know what's wrong with me.

Going to be 21 and haven't even had, like...

..a relationship for, like, even a month!

I'm just getting to the point where I don't even want to try...any more.

Even if a guy comes up to me and says, "Oh, I want to be with you,"

I'm going to be, like, "You're kidding."

"Like, this is not going to work out. Cos you're lying."

-REPORTER:

-'It's the most unusual love story we've ever seen.

'America's first transgender teen couple

'openly dating and madly in love...'

One year after talking to the world's press about their surgery,

Arin and Katie are ready to share

the next chapter in their relationship.

They were a transgender couple

who knew exactly what the other had gone through,

but now they've broken up.

Katie has decided to break up with Arin.

I just wasn't happy with the relationship and, um,

I could see it was taking a toll on him, taking a toll on us,

and our friendships and my grades and his grades, and...

I just thought it was best if we split apart.

I broke his heart, I know, but, um, I did it for...our sake.

I've never been in a relationship besides her since I've been a man.

-REPORTER:

-'Transgendered or not,

'Arin was like any teenage boy who got dumped.'

I definitely reacted in the "guy way,"

or, you know, the typical man way.

I was upset and I punched things.

The community Arin and Katie built online was devastated too.

And I feel like in our own community,

we were looking up to Katie and Arin.

You know, a normal couple

who understood what they were going through

and who've stayed with each other for so long...

And it just sucks that they broke up,

you know, I'm really sad about it.

But Claire rallies the troops.

I think it's very important

that we all be here for Katie in her break-up

cos I know I would want someone to be there for me.

Katie felt one aspect in particular was missing from her relationship...

An aspect that was hard to talk about.

We didn't have an intimate life, really.

You know, it was just... And that was OK with me.

We talked about it, you know, we tried stuff.

But all in all, it wouldn't work out,

so eventually we were just like, "All right, who cares?

"That's not important, let's just have a good time,

"enjoy each other's company."

If you're dating me for sex, then I think you're in the wrong place.

-ARIN LAUGHS

-Definitely, you know,

you better go down the road cos you're not going to find that here.

I'm mean, that's... It's an important part of a relationship, but it's not all that.

You know, I... I thought it was kind of funny.

I was, like, "Oh, great!

"As soon as I get a vagina, I get a boyfriend without a penis.

-"Like, what?"

-MIMICS COMIC TONE:

-Womp, womp, womp.

Few people can relate to Arin's situation like Devon.

Following Arin and Katie's ending, and Katie having transitioned fully

and Arin still kind of being held back,

I think, me being the jealous type that I am,

it'd be very hard for me to have somebody else

who's a lot farther in transitioning than I am.

Despite the news about Arin and Katie's break up,

Devon still believes he can find romance.

I'm kind of like a hopeless romantic.

I get my hopes up high for a lot of things that I shouldn't,

and I like to keep them high, kind of hoping,

always hoping for the best.

He's ready to lay his heart on the line with Kelsie.

Hello!

-DEVON LAUGHS

-Hello!

-Those are for you.

-Oh, my gosh. Thank you!

Yeah!

You can pick the spot cos YOU'RE taking ME on the date!

I see, we'll just sit on top of the hill.

So, I was kind of nervous whether or not you would come today.

Um, because having said that I'm transgender,

it could change the way you look at me.

Not at all! Not at all. Nope. I don't know why it would. You know?

I mean, I see you as a guy and that's what you are.

So, Kelsie...

For some reason... you kind of stopped me in my tracks.

-(Stop!)

-DEVON LAUGHS

And I... I definitely think

there's more than just like a... like a friend connection.

Where, where kind of...

Where kind of would you want this to go?

I'm not exactly sure.

I mean, I'd like to see, like, where it goes.

-I mean, we just met, kind of thing.

-Mm-hm.

I think you're a really interesting person.

I'd like to get to know you a lot better.

I think the ultimate goal at the end of my life,

I would definitely want to find somebody that I'm in love with.

BOTH LAUGH

I think it would be lovely to eventually marry a woman

and carry on with our lives as normal people and being in love.

As Devon looks to the future,

Arin is trying not to dwell on the past.

The best way to cope, for me,

is just hanging out with my friends, having a good time,

working out, you know?

Keeping on the positive side of things.

He recognises how far he's come.

It's a very beautiful thing when you can see yourself transform

into something that you've always seen yourself in the mirror.

And despite his heartbreak, he and Katie are still close.

I feel like we're always just going to be friends

and I think we're a lot stronger because of it.

Transitioning with Katie has given me and her a very unique bond.

Katie is now 21 and Arin 19.

He's started uni and is determined to move on

and live his life to the full.

Arin and Katie's romance

continues to impact the growing transgender community...

..who will always see them as the golden couple.

It's just, like, what are the odds that two people that are transgender

and struggling with the same things

kind of find each other and fall in love?

I think it's very... that's reassuring.

I wish I could, you know, find something like that.