Jamie: Drag Queen at 16


Jamie: Drag Queen at 16

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Transcript


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This programme contains some strong language.

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I've got a secret. I've had to hide it my whole life.

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It started when I was very young.

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I remember doing it when I was five years old even.

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And hardly anybody knows.

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Even my dad doesn't know.

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I only really do it in the house now.

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It's not really accepted.

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People look upon it as something seedy

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or something disgusting because they don't understand, but I'm sick of hiding.

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In a few weeks' time, I'm planning to tell everybody at my end of school prom.

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Of course, I'm worried. Some people might be really nasty about it.

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But I want everybody to know.

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At 16 years old, I want to be a drag queen.

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Jamie lives in a small, northern, ex-mining town.

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In four months' time, he will take his GCSEs and leave school.

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He is openly gay,

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but no-one at school knows his secret plans for the end of year prom.

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Everyone's got their prom dresses now. There's only a few people that don't.

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He has told everyone he will be going in a flamboyant suit.

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I want lights on the suit. I want to see it with lights and diamantes on. Yes.

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But Jamie is hiding the truth.

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I'm going to prom in a dress.

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That's a wrap. Whoo!

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Sit!

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Dougal, sit...

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Run, Forrest.

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I really can't remember a single day in my life

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that I have not been told that I'm gay or I'm different or I'm a freak.

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In primary school, it was like, "You're a girl," cos no-one knew what "gay" was then.

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They were pushing me in the girls' toilets.

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Then when you get older, it's more, "Oh, God, Jamie, you're so gay. Oh, God!"

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If I'm walking with my friends, they'll be like, "He's just called you gay." I'm like, "Oh, really?"

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It does bottle up inside you.

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Why not wait? Why not go to the prom in a suit

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and then go out the weekend later when nobody knows you and wear what you want to wear then?

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Why let them win? Why let them have drilled me down and put me in a suit?

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I want them to see me and know that they haven't won

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and that I will do what I want anyway.

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All of the pushing and putting down they've done over the years will just be a slap in the face for them.

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# Everything that happens... #

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I can only imagine what the Willies are going to be like when they see me.

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They'll probably just, like, literally die, like...

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"My God, he is actually in a dress. As if he couldn't get any worse!"

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-How did I tell you?

-You went, "Mam..." I said, "What?" "I think I'm bisexual."

-Mam, don't!

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-An only child, Jamie lives with his mum Margaret...

-Bisexual is just greedy.

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..dogs Charlie and Dougal

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and Dita Von Teese, the rabbit.

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-Have you heard anything from your dad lately?

-No, not really, like...

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Jamie's parents broke up when he was seven. His dad lives nearby with his new partner.

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We are almost opposite people, like...

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I like wearing heels. He likes looking at women in heels.

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He hasn't told his dad about his passion for drag.

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His mum Margaret didn't need to be told.

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There's one that we remember, trying my shoes on.

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The first time I think I realised was I'd gone up stairs to put some washing away

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and he sort of ran in his bedroom.

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And when I asked him to come out,

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he was making a lot of racket and then came out quite sheepish.

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He just said he was playing.

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But when I went in his bedroom, he had one of my dresses and he hid it under the bed.

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I saw it sticking out and I thought, "Oh..."

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Lights sort of switched on and things started to make a bit more sense.

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When Mam was downstairs, I'd sneak upstairs.

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She obviously knew I was doing it.

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Then I'd put her dresses on and, of course, they'd be a lot bigger than me,

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so I'd tie them in at the waist with, like, dressing gown cords and stuff, and parade around.

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He never really went out to play as in boys running around and climbing trees.

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If I put make-up on, he wanted to copy

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and a few times, we had to scrub it off his face and hide it in case his dad saw it.

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It's such a slutty wedding dress. It's my type of style.

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-Are you the only person that sees the real Jamie?

-I would say so, yes. Definitely.

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My whole life has been hiding

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and leading up to this one moment which is prom.

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I'm eventually coming out of the closet again,

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but instead of coming out as a gay person, it's coming out as a drag queen.

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At the moment, Jamie's drag queen alter ego

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only dares to venture outside under the cover of darkness.

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# I go out walking

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# After midnight... #

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When I put those heels on, I just totally transform.

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# Like we used to do

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# I'm always walking after midnight

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# Searching for you... #

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I feel sexy and beautiful and fierce.

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# I walk for miles along the highway... #

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It's the sound as well...

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..that you associate with women in heels.

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It's so amazing when it's, like, coming from you.

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# ..after midnight searching for you... #

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Just in the confines of your house, you're free and there's, like, no boundaries.

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You look up at the sky and there's stars and everything.

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I keep losing my balance. You don't smile. You just...

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It's such a thrill and so exhilarating.

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# ..out in the starlight just hoping... #

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I just love it.

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# ..somewhere walking after midnight

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# Searching for me... #

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With three months to go till prom night, Jamie still has a huge amount to do.

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What do you say when you go into a wig shop?

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He has enlisted the help of a trusted few to help him realise his ambition.

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I'm wanting a wig, but...

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His friend Sam.

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I think it makes me look like a man from the '80s or something.

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'I told her because she's a very trustworthy person.

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'So I know my secret's safe.'

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-His grandma May.

-Hallo, ich heisse Jamie.

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CONTINUES IN GERMAN

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-Hello!

-Hiya.

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Close family friend Leigh.

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You're amongst people who are very accepting and loyal. The world isn't like that, pet.

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And his mum Margaret.

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We're just trying to prepare you for what's going to happen.

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-We have to go, Jamie.

-Yeah, I like that.

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-Is it realistic?

-You need to start somewhere.

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I wouldn't take the money off Mam cos she doesn't have it to start off with.

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'With the boobs that I got some time last year, it was like an investment.

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'Like me, Mam, Leigh all chipped in together to get them.'

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-There's someone walking past.

-So what?

-And I've got boobs in my hand.

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Stop playing with them. That's every man's dream!

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Margaret has also agreed to pay for Jamie's wig...

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I'll be back another time with Mam.

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..shoes and make-up.

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-Can you mix pink and orange? I love pink and orange together.

-Oh, no.

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But the next big investment is the dress.

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-I've put some dresses aside if you want to have a look.

-Thank you.

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Three, two, one, oh, God.

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SINGS TO HIMSELF

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I actually do like that one, yeah.

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-Is this the first time you've been in front of strangers in a dress?

-Yeah. How lucky do you feel?

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-You look good.

-Especially with no boobs.

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Do you want to see the boobs in with that dress?

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Aagh!

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Stop screaming.

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-That's more kind of glam, isn't it?

-Yeah.

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We'll have to do something about those nipples!

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-Everyone will be wowed by it if you wear that one.

-Yeah.

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It makes your boobs look really good as well.

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-I think it's very brave.

-That's what I was going to say.

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You've got to do it while you're young and make yourself happy.

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If you can't be true to yourself now, where will you be in ten years' time?

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Aagh! Oh, my God, that was like waxing!

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-Can I feel those?

-Yeah.

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They're realistic, aren't they?

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Do you want a go? LAUGHTER

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There are so many nice dresses.

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-Has anyone ever seen you in drag before?

-No. Mam has...

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Not even a single one of your friends at school will know about it. God!

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-Bye.

-See you later.

-See you later.

-Bye.

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Jamie also needs to work on his make-up technique.

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He has been learning from professional drag queens on the internet.

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He's just so talented. Some people are born to put make-up on and he's obviously one of those people.

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But while they effortlessly achieve that polished look,

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Jamie is far from happy with what he sees in the mirror.

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You cover your eyebrows, so you can draw them on a lot more higher and defined.

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I wouldn't go out to prom with my make-up like this. Oh, no, no, this is wrong.

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I need someone to show me how to do it properly, so it doesn't go like this.

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Yeah, even this side I'm not happy with.

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Mam!

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-I literally want to cry.

-Why? What's wrong with you?

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Look! It looks disgusting. I'm just...

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Look up straight. I can't see.

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-Even the side with my natural brows is horrible.

-That is, but it's too dark.

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-If you don't like it, take it off.

-I am taking it off.

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Get on with it.

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I'll have to be shown how to do this properly. I'm not doing it any more until I know what I'm doing.

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I do not feel ready for prom right now. I don't want to look like a man in drag.

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I want to look like a pretty woman.

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I want the girls to be jealous.

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Do you want to sit forward?

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'So do you want to be a girl?'

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No, I don't want to be a girl, like.

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I want to be a boy when I'm out of drag and look like a gorgeous hot girl when I'm in drag.

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I don't want an operation to be a woman.

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I just want to perform as a girl, like, for a cover, yeah.

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Jamie has come to a drag cabaret show in Newcastle.

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MUSICAL INTRO

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# A kiss on the hand may be quite continental

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# But diamonds are a girl's best friend

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# A kiss may be grand

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# But it won't pay the rental on your humble flat

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# Or help you feed your pussycat

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# Cos that's when those lasses go back to their spouses

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# Diamonds

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# Are a...

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-# Girl's best...

-Diamonds are a girl's best...

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# Friend... #

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CHEERING

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Jamie is going backstage to meet the star of the show,

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Betty Legs Diamond, also known as Simon.

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-Hello, Sam. Nice eyelashes.

-Thank you.

-Take a seat.

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-Did you enjoy the show?

-Fabulous.

-Yeah.

-Absolutely fabulous.

-Oh, super.

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-So how did you start?

-Probably like you, I used to dress up in Mum's clothes.

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I went to theatre school and I ended up in the West End of London.

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I worked with a brilliant make-up artist and he taught me how to pluck your eyebrows out.

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-I can do everything but that.

-With the back of your nail, you apply it to the brow of there

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and draw in the brow, but always incorporate your brow line. Any other questions for me?

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How do you tuck properly?

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I hope they're clean.

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One of these pushes you all in and back. It feels very uncomfortable.

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-Yeah.

-But you can pee backwards!

-LAUGHTER

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So, basically, the plan is in about a month's time or something, high school prom.

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Instead of going in a suit, I'm going in full drag. Is that a bad idea?

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-To your school?

-Yeah.

-There are two sides to this.

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It's either a good thing cos you're saying, "This is who I am," and you've got to be strong,

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but you've got to be able to have a comeback and an escape route cos it could get very ugly.

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-Inside, I want to wear a dress and be fabulous.

-I'm sure you will, but life isn't always a film.

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My dad doesn't know.

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Should I tell him before?

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I never told my dad.

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He always... He probably always knew I was gay. Then I said, "I'm in a show in Blackpool."

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At the end of the show, I said, "There are two people who are very special to me in the audience.

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"It's my mum and dad. Give my mum and my fabulous dad a great round of applause."

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He was as pleased as Punch. Sit him down, tell him man to man, "I love you. This is what I want to do."

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-I've always said honesty is the best policy, Jamie.

-Absolutely. That is a great way to live - honesty.

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Why not put a show on here, get some friends to come and see you?

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That would be so good, like, oh...

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Yeah. Could I, like...?

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-Yeah. You could put a little ten-minute thing together.

-Yeah.

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If you need any help putting it together, I'll help you as much as I can.

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-Thank you.

-All right, look after yourself.

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-Bye.

-Ta-ra. Bye.

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# Man wanted... #

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Within a few weeks, that could be Jamie up there on the stage.

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# Who'll kiss me till I cry... #

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And there is one person more than any other who he would love to see in the audience.

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# About this much across and just about ye high... #

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'It's a massive moment, telling my dad.

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'I think if you ask any drag queen out there, they'll agree.'

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In your dream scenario, what's your dad going to tell you?

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The dream scenario would be if I told him and he was like,

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"Oh, wow, when can I go and see the first show?" That would be the perfect scenario.

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It would just be like such a relief if he was happy and supportive of it.

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Because that's sort of like what I've been wanting my whole life, like,

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to make him well and truly proud.

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There are eight weeks till prom, but only six till Jamie's drag show.

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Rehearsals begin in secret at the village hall.

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Jamie has asked his 19-year-old friend Sam to be his backing dancer.

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Today, she will see him in heels for the first time.

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Yeah, size women's eight. Boo-yah!

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-Can you walk in them absolutely fine?

-Yes.

-Can you dance in them though?

-Yes.

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It just makes it a bit more real.

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Are you shocked as well?

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POP MUSIC INTRO

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# I've been bitten by the bug and I'm coming down... #

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Oh, is it jumping?

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CD STICKS IN MACHINE

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Right, I'm not having it!

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Why is my song jumping?

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It's not my fault.

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# I've been bitten by the bug and I'm coming down

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# With something that can't be cured... #

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Run, run, run.

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This side.

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And then this comes in front of us.

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I'm going to kick you.

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Roll. Then the chorus.

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A bit more sexy this time. Powerball, go on, ow!

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'When he put them on, he sort of like came alive sort of thing.

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'It's quite emotional, really, seeing that.'

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You saw the real Jamie then and it was really good to see. I'm really happy for him.

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Aagh!

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'I'm really close to Jamie. I think of him as like my little brother.'

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-Is there anything you're worried about for him?

-His safety, I think.

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Although a lot of people will think he's really good, a lot of people will totally disagree with it

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and I am worried about what could happen about that,

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but...I've just got to hope everything goes OK for him, really.

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# Baby, when I heard you

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# For the first time I knew

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# We were meant to be as one... #

0:19:490:19:55

Hi!

0:19:570:19:59

Ooh, it's Christmas!

0:19:590:20:02

# Was tired of running out of luck... #

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They look more slutty than I thought they would.

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# Didn't know what to do... #

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Pull the shoe. Do you like it?

0:20:160:20:19

# And everything went from wrong to right... #

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Oh, look at ya!

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# ..really blew my mind It was love at first sight... #

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Wow!

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# Cos, baby, when I heard you... #

0:20:310:20:35

-KNOCK AT DOOR

-Help!

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I'll just go and get this.

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You can hide here as well.

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Good morning, Margaret.

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-Why are you hiding?

-There's a man at the door.

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What would he think? You don't just turn up to someone's house and see a boy in a dress!

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Jamie is back at the theatre to show Simon what he plans to do in his drag performance.

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-Have you been up on one before?

-I've been on a stage, but not mine.

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-Have you tried heels on a stage? Put 'em on.

-Snowman socks.

0:21:110:21:14

-Show me your bevel.

-What?

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That's called a bevel. Drop your foot in, drop your knee over, then give the attitude.

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-Anything else you want to use?

-Your little entrance.

-I never do a little entrance.

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If it gets too high, shout "stop" and we'll bring you back down.

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Just like a roller-coaster.

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How fierce is this?

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I feel like Kylie Minogue.

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Jamie can't rely on a flashy entrance alone. It's what he does next that will really count.

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Hit it.

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MUSIC INTRO PLAYS

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Just lying on a table, casually.

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Then the legs go up in the air and do a little choreographed thing with my legs.

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Then still lying down.

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# I've been bitten by the bug and now I'm coming down

0:22:090:22:12

# With something that can't be cured... #

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Turn over.

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Stand up on the table, then we need something choreographed here, don't we?

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# Don't you feel the fever like I do?

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# Feel the fever... #

0:22:290:22:32

At the moment, it's shit. I wouldn't want to pay to watch that.

0:22:320:22:36

The routine's got to stand up and be good on its own, all right?

0:22:360:22:40

I won't put my name to that.

0:22:400:22:43

Oh, God!

0:22:430:22:45

I'm really scared now.

0:22:450:22:47

If there's nothing to back it up, you're just a pretty boy in a frock.

0:22:470:22:51

Finish your lines off.

0:22:540:22:56

'I feel disappointed of what I've shown him.

0:22:560:22:59

'I think he is thinking, "Why have I agreed to let him on my stage and use my silver loop?"'

0:22:590:23:05

You want to finish it - bang, and then go on.

0:23:050:23:09

Give it a bit of attitude with that shoulder.

0:23:090:23:12

'He tells me the real things and not just what I want to hear

0:23:120:23:16

'which a lot of people like Mam and Sam do.

0:23:160:23:19

'I need someone like that to hit home that I do need to make myself a better act.'

0:23:190:23:24

Whoa, and go! There you are.

0:23:240:23:28

-Are you going to watch me get ready tonight?

-Yeah.

-Ask questions, give you a few tips on make-up?

0:23:280:23:33

-So this is the stuff you use?

-Yeah.

0:23:340:23:38

-How's it all been going?

-It's all right, yeah.

0:23:490:23:53

We went back to watch him getting ready for the show.

0:23:550:23:58

-Rub it in.

-'The whole atmosphere in the changing room...

0:24:000:24:05

-'You know how you imagine with the light bulbs and mirrors? It was so good.

-You felt completely at ease?'

0:24:050:24:11

-Yeah. I could just imagine me being there and getting ready and getting involved in the bitchiness.

-Mm-hm.

0:24:110:24:19

-See you later.

-Bye.

-Bye.

0:24:220:24:24

-Good luck.

-I want to see you rehearsed and polished next time.

-Oh, God!

0:24:240:24:29

Pass me that pen and pad.

0:24:350:24:37

He is visiting his mum's best friend Leigh with whom he shares a close bond.

0:24:370:24:43

She has agreed to help him formulate his drag queen persona, starting with the name.

0:24:430:24:49

What about Shaquille?

0:24:490:24:52

Lil-Lil, as in Lil...Lil?

0:24:520:24:55

Charisse?

0:24:550:24:56

Lady Laura...

0:24:560:24:59

-Linguine.

-Linguine?

0:25:010:25:04

Charlotte...Shallot.

0:25:040:25:07

Charlotte Shallot.

0:25:070:25:09

-Charlotte Shallot?

-Likes it a lot.

0:25:090:25:12

Think about it.

0:25:140:25:16

And now appearing here for the first time tonight,

0:25:160:25:22

it's Lady Charlotte Shallot!

0:25:220:25:26

No.

0:25:260:25:27

Lady Leigh...Feelfree.

0:25:270:25:31

LAUGHTER

0:25:310:25:33

Delphine Del Rio.

0:25:350:25:37

Dappy Delphine.

0:25:370:25:39

She's a bitch,

0:25:390:25:41

like in a corset and her big, massive heels and big hair.

0:25:410:25:45

She's a bit violent at times.

0:25:450:25:48

She's not afraid...not to use her face, to use her claws.

0:25:480:25:52

-Like nails and stuff.

-Her talons.

-Yeah, her talons.

0:25:520:25:55

This is the start.

0:25:550:25:57

But there is a long road ahead.

0:25:570:26:00

The next step on that road will involve telling his dad all about his plans

0:26:060:26:12

for the drag show and prom.

0:26:120:26:14

Jamie is calling to arrange a meeting where he hopes to tell his dad face to face.

0:26:140:26:20

'I do feel like I have let him down

0:26:210:26:24

'because it's sort of like my fault for, like, our relationship not being as good

0:26:240:26:30

'as a proper son and father's relationship would have been.'

0:26:300:26:34

Hi!

0:26:340:26:35

'I just want to be successful and that's so I can make up for not being the son

0:26:350:26:40

'that he wanted or imagined.

0:26:400:26:42

'If I could step out on to a stage'

0:26:430:26:46

and just have Dad there...

0:26:460:26:48

..all happy and clapping and proud of what I've been doing,

0:26:490:26:53

that would just be so amazing.

0:26:530:26:56

Do you want to, like, do something tomorrow,

0:26:570:27:01

like take the dog out or something?

0:27:010:27:05

Would you swap that for an audience full of strangers?

0:27:050:27:08

I think I would, yeah.

0:27:080:27:11

I've just got something I need to talk to you about.

0:27:110:27:15

He doesn't see a lot of his dad or hear from him now

0:27:150:27:18

and I think it might be a case of... He might never see his dad again.

0:27:180:27:22

What am I going to say?

0:27:280:27:31

But the next day, before he has a chance to meet his dad, there is another problem.

0:27:430:27:49

-Mam...

-Uh-huh?

0:27:490:27:51

-I am absolutely, actually furious.

-Why? What's happened?

0:27:510:27:57

His secret plans for prom seem to have leaked out.

0:27:570:28:00

He was called in for a meeting at school with his head of year.

0:28:000:28:04

She was just all normal and then she was like,

0:28:040:28:07

"The reason I've come in... I've got you here

0:28:070:28:10

"is we've had parents on the phone that have heard rumours that you're going to prom in a dress

0:28:100:28:17

"and they think it's disgusting," and stuff like that.

0:28:170:28:21

It's the word "disgusting", ever since she's told me,

0:28:210:28:25

the word "disgusting" has been running in my head and it's making me boil.

0:28:250:28:30

I can... I don't know...

0:28:300:28:32

I think "disgusting" is the worst word you could call somebody.

0:28:320:28:37

Am I saying, "You can't do this because I think it's disgusting?" No, I'm not.

0:28:370:28:42

They're discriminating against me. Why should they be allowed to?

0:28:420:28:47

Hello! Just me!

0:28:480:28:51

-Are you all right?

-Not really.

0:28:510:28:54

How's it OK for people to discriminate against gays and crossdressers?

0:28:540:29:01

What's going on?

0:29:010:29:03

One of the teachers has said some of the parents have heard that he's going to the prom in a dress.

0:29:030:29:09

-And it disgusts them.

-They want reassurance it's not going to happen.

0:29:090:29:15

Oh, for fuck's sake!

0:29:150:29:17

-Honest to god, it boils my piss!

-They don't even understand and they're not getting the chance to.

0:29:180:29:25

What are they actually referring to as disgusting? I mean, what planet do they live on?

0:29:250:29:32

Don't cry, Dappy Delphine.

0:29:330:29:35

-All right, I'm going, then. Bye for now.

-Bye for now.

0:29:370:29:41

If this has come out now, you have to have this conversation with your dad sooner rather than later.

0:29:410:29:48

I really do need to come and speak to you tonight.

0:29:480:29:53

Mm-hm.

0:29:530:29:54

-Hello?

-The school have returned a call from Margaret

0:29:540:29:59

and confirmed they have received an anonymous complaint from someone

0:29:590:30:03

-saying they would be disgusted if the school allowed a boy to go to prom in a dress.

-It's a bad word.

0:30:030:30:10

This has hurt him more than anything and that's why I'd like to come in and have a discussion tomorrow.

0:30:100:30:16

With Jamie present as well. ..Thanks very much. Bye now.

0:30:160:30:21

She said she'd asked you and you had said no.

0:30:230:30:27

-Should I have said that, that it wasn't true?

-Well, no.

0:30:270:30:32

-But it was spur of the moment.

-I was scared.

-I know, I know.

0:30:320:30:36

She'll understand that tomorrow, but I think you need to tell her the truth.

0:30:360:30:42

Give us a love.

0:30:420:30:44

You all right, sweetheart?

0:30:470:30:49

Jamie's dad is on his way to pick him up, giving him just enough time to change.

0:30:510:30:58

I've tried to be all casual and boyish.

0:30:580:31:02

Jamie, you don't have to be boyish, darling. You are who you are.

0:31:020:31:06

Track suit bottoms, creased top and white plimsolls I haven't worn in about two years.

0:31:060:31:12

-Are you happy?

-That's what you wear walking, isn't it?

0:31:120:31:17

I just want his acceptance. That's all I want.

0:31:170:31:21

'This moment's been building for years and years, coming, like.'

0:31:210:31:26

Pretty much as much as I can remember, like, from when I started doing it,

0:31:260:31:32

I knew this day would come eventually and it's going to happen in a matter of minutes.

0:31:330:31:39

Here he is.

0:31:480:31:50

Oh, my God!

0:31:500:31:52

Help!

0:31:520:31:54

Be honest. Tell him everything.

0:31:540:31:57

Deep breath, don't let him walk away. OK?

0:31:570:32:01

Bye!

0:32:010:32:03

Be brave.

0:32:040:32:06

-How do you feel?

-Sick.

0:32:090:32:12

Come on, you two. Let's go for a walk.

0:32:140:32:17

How long's he been gone?

0:32:290:32:32

About 20 minutes.

0:32:330:32:35

Nineteen and a half!

0:32:350:32:38

At least he hasn't turned the car round and brought him immediately back! So that's a bonus.

0:32:380:32:43

-Mam!

-How's it gone?

0:32:480:32:50

It was quite good, actually,

0:32:500:32:53

but can I go to the toilet before I fill you in?

0:32:530:32:57

-I'm desperate.

-Right, hurry up.

0:32:570:33:00

SHE EXHALES NERVOUSLY

0:33:050:33:07

It was more positive than negative. Basically, I got in the car and he was like,

0:33:080:33:14

"What's this about?" Then, basically, after a while I just came out and said, "Yeah,

0:33:140:33:20

"I want to be a drag queen." And he sort of, like, looked a bit taken aback for a bit.

0:33:200:33:26

Then he was like, "To be honest, it would be a lie to say that I didn't see it coming."

0:33:260:33:33

-Did you think he supported you? Did you tell him how he made you feel?

-I told him about the performance.

0:33:330:33:39

I don't think he wants to come.

0:33:390:33:42

SHE SIGHS

0:33:420:33:44

And then...

0:33:440:33:46

I went on to prom and that's where he was like, "I don't think you should do that.

0:33:460:33:53

"That's like slapping people in the face, like." I sort of do understand what he's saying.

0:33:530:33:59

Well, are you going to prom?

0:33:590:34:02

I don't think so.

0:34:020:34:04

I just feel as if you're giving in too easy. You've had this planned for months

0:34:050:34:10

and now you've had 10 minutes of your dad and you're like, "Oh, I don't want to do it."

0:34:100:34:16

I'm not going to be able to get in!

0:34:160:34:19

Well, can't say any more than that, can I?

0:34:190:34:23

You're just always going to find an excuse to say he's in the wrong.

0:34:230:34:28

I just think you should be as honest with him as you are with me.

0:34:290:34:33

The next day, Jamie and his mum have had their meeting with the Head of Year.

0:34:380:34:44

The school said they want to ensure that all students are able to enjoy equal attention at prom

0:34:440:34:50

so they have discouraged Jamie from wearing a dress.

0:34:500:34:54

Hi.

0:34:540:34:56

-What now?

-No...

0:35:010:35:03

The people who I'm listening to now are telling me, like, reasons why I shouldn't do it

0:35:040:35:11

and not many people have really said it's a good idea.

0:35:110:35:15

-I think you need to seriously decide what you want to do now.

-Well, I am. That's what I'm doing.

0:35:150:35:21

-I can't talk to you when you're in this mood.

-Well, you're talking to me like I'm an idiot.

0:35:210:35:27

-Well, stop acting like one.

-I'm not!

0:35:270:35:30

For God's sake.

0:35:320:35:35

You always say things like that and make me sound stupid, then you go off storming like I'm wrong.

0:35:350:35:41

Because, Jamie, it's things you knew. I just don't understand now why...

0:35:410:35:47

-Because I'm not going to get in!

-It's not as if it's the first time it's been mentioned.

0:35:470:35:53

Are you the person running prom? The person that lets people in?

0:35:530:35:57

-No, just there to pick the bits up as usual.

-I'm just being sensible!

0:35:570:36:02

-You should have thought about this...

-Well, I'm sorry! I didn't!

0:36:020:36:06

-And that's my fault.

-Cos I was blinded by what I wanted to do.

0:36:060:36:11

Now I've thought about it, now I know what'll happen, now I know the consequences.

0:36:120:36:18

Now I've thought differently.

0:36:180:36:21

DOOR CLOSES

0:36:310:36:33

What are you thinking at the moment?

0:36:390:36:42

Today, at this moment in time, I'm thinking of not going through with it,

0:36:430:36:48

but I think I really do need to clear my head and think about it cos it is a really big decision.

0:36:480:36:55

Like, I knew there was going to be people against it, but until I was called into that office

0:36:570:37:03

to say they'd had a complaint about it, it hasn't really sunk in until now.

0:37:030:37:08

It's easy saying it's going to be a challenge and it'll be hard and I'll fight it,

0:37:080:37:14

but when it does come it's hard to, like, fight it. It's harder than just saying it.

0:37:140:37:21

How long do you leave it on for?

0:37:210:37:23

It stinks!

0:37:250:37:27

I need a wee.

0:37:280:37:30

Yeah, some's coming off.

0:37:330:37:35

RUNS TAP

0:37:390:37:41

'It doesn't matter if you love him or capital H-I-M...'

0:37:430:37:48

Despite his confusion over prom, Jamie is still committed to going through with his drag show.

0:37:480:37:55

Drop.

0:37:550:37:56

-Quite a lot of it's not working. It's cos I'm nervous. You don't know how nervous I am.

-It's all right.

0:37:570:38:04

-So...

-Take a breath.

0:38:040:38:06

MUSIC PLAYS

0:38:060:38:08

I can't...

0:38:100:38:12

-Running into there's not going to help.

-No.

-They'll laugh at you.

0:38:160:38:20

You've got to own the stage and be bigger than life. As big as Texas.

0:38:200:38:25

None of these, right?

0:38:250:38:27

Now that his drag plans have leaked out at school, he's taking another big step.

0:38:270:38:33

After years of secrecy, he has decided to tell his school friends exactly what he's doing

0:38:330:38:39

-and invite them to the show.

-How did you feel when you pressed "send"?

0:38:390:38:44

Like, it took me a while. It took me about five minutes. I was sat like...

0:38:440:38:49

My God. Oh, my God.

0:38:490:38:51

And then I sent it and went, "Ohh!" Like, it was so...dramatic, obviously, cos it's me,

0:38:510:38:57

but that's basically the first time people finding out.

0:38:570:39:02

Dad rang me. He was like, "So you've put it out in public."

0:39:020:39:06

I was like, "Are you going to come to the show?" He was like, "No."

0:39:060:39:11

So I was like, "OK."

0:39:110:39:13

I'd say about that.

0:39:140:39:16

'I suppose if I give him time maybe he'll come round and come and see it.'

0:39:160:39:22

-Come here.

-Get on Mammy.

0:39:220:39:24

Stop laughing and just do it.

0:39:260:39:29

MUSIC PLAYS

0:39:290:39:31

'Tomorrow, everyone's going to see me wearing a dress for the first time in public.'

0:39:320:39:38

Ow! Chihuahua!

0:39:380:39:41

Back to my song...

0:39:440:39:46

'Her name is Fifi Latrue.

0:39:460:39:50

'Fifi is the little creature

0:39:510:39:54

'that has been trying to get out of me for all these years.

0:39:540:39:58

'And she's going to be born on the stage in Boulevard tomorrow.

0:39:580:40:03

'She's finally, like, coming out the closet, not hiding any more.'

0:40:030:40:07

Boom! Kick ahead! Fall back into my man off the bed who has caught me.

0:40:070:40:12

And then I will kiss him because he's attractive.

0:40:120:40:16

Ah!

0:40:210:40:22

My God. What is that?

0:40:270:40:29

Oh, God. This is so amazing. I sat and watched them last time and now it's me.

0:40:420:40:48

I got a text off Dad.

0:40:490:40:51

"Good luck for today. Remember, relax and enjoy the time onstage." Aww.

0:40:510:40:56

Hello, everybody.

0:40:580:41:00

Hi!

0:41:090:41:10

Are you strapped in?

0:41:110:41:14

-Oh, my God...

-You all right?

0:41:140:41:17

Enjoy it. That's all you've got to do. Enjoy it.

0:41:170:41:21

-Don't. Don't make me cry.

-No. Smile.

0:41:210:41:24

'He really hopes that this day is going to be the beginning of his new life.'

0:41:240:41:30

You're going to be fabulous!

0:41:330:41:36

Come on. 'A mother's love is unconditional. He's my boy.'

0:41:360:41:40

-Don't, Mam...

-'It's what makes him who he is.

0:41:400:41:44

'And I love him.'

0:41:440:41:46

-How many people's there?

-About 50.

0:41:480:41:51

Miss Lori! Come on, make some noise!

0:41:510:41:55

All right, down there in the canary yellow?

0:41:560:42:00

You ever seen a lady that looks like me before?

0:42:000:42:05

It's showtime, guys.

0:42:050:42:07

Welcome to the stage, in a debut performance, the one and only Miss Fifi Latrue!

0:42:070:42:14

Three, two, one, here we go!

0:42:140:42:16

CHEERING

0:42:170:42:19

MUSIC PLAYS

0:42:200:42:22

LIP SYNCHS TO MUSIC # I've been bitten by the bug and I am coming down

0:42:280:42:33

# With something that can't be cured

0:42:330:42:36

# So tell me what do you prescribe for these symptoms

0:42:360:42:39

# A heart beating faster and work is a disaster

0:42:390:42:44

# I'm lovesick when you're not around Check me over

0:42:440:42:48

# Strong hands are healing I'm dancing on the ceiling

0:42:480:42:52

CHEERING

0:42:520:42:54

# Tell me what do you prescribe for these symptoms

0:43:000:43:03

WHOOPS AND CHEERS

0:43:030:43:05

# I'm lovesick when you're not around Check me over

0:43:060:43:11

# Strong hands are healing I'm dancing on the ceiling

0:43:110:43:16

# Fever sure has got me good

0:43:160:43:19

# What do you do when fever takes hold?

0:43:190:43:25

# I can't help but need this drug

0:43:250:43:27

# Don't you feel the fever like I do?

0:43:270:43:32

# Feel the fever! #

0:43:320:43:34

What about that?! Absolutely sensational!

0:43:340:43:39

It's Miss Fifi Latrue! And her dancers - yes!

0:43:390:43:44

-That went so bad, it went so bad...

-It was really amazing.

0:43:460:43:51

And everybody loved it. You could hear them wowing.

0:43:510:43:55

I wish I'd a pair of legs like that!

0:43:550:43:58

Were my nipples out?

0:43:580:44:00

He didn't fall down in them heels!

0:44:000:44:03

Oh, my God! I've done it!

0:44:030:44:06

-He's a good-looking woman.

-I'd go for him.

-"I'd go for him"!

0:44:060:44:10

Then it's showtime. I can't even walk in these heels.

0:44:100:44:14

LOUD CHEERS

0:44:140:44:16

'Every day, as soon as I walk out the door, I'm trying to be somebody who I'm not.

0:44:180:44:25

'My dream is to be in drag and feel totally free.'

0:44:270:44:32

# My mama told me when I was young

0:44:320:44:36

# We are all born superstars... #

0:44:360:44:39

'I don't have to be anybody else. I can just be myself and not have to worry what other people say.'

0:44:390:44:47

# I'm beautiful in my way Cos God makes no mistakes

0:44:470:44:50

# I'm on the right track, baby I was born this way.

0:44:500:44:54

# No matter black, white or beige Chola or orient made

0:44:540:44:58

# I'm on the right track, baby I was born to be brave

0:44:580:45:02

# I'm beautiful in my way Cos God makes no mistakes

0:45:020:45:06

# I'm on the right track, baby I was born this way

0:45:060:45:11

# Don't hide yourself in regret Just love yourself and you're set

0:45:110:45:14

# I'm on the right track, baby I was...

0:45:140:45:17

# Ooh, there ain't no other way Baby, I was born this way

0:45:170:45:22

# Baby, I was born this way

0:45:220:45:25

# Born this way Baby, I was born this way

0:45:250:45:29

# I'm on the right track, baby I was born this way. #

0:45:290:45:34

CHEERING

0:45:340:45:36

There you go!

0:45:370:45:39

The one and only, Miss Fifi Latrue!

0:45:390:45:44

How fabulous was that, everybody? Keep it going, keep it going!

0:45:440:45:49

Hello!

0:45:490:45:50

That was rubbish! LAUGHTER

0:45:500:45:52

Fabulous. Give me a little kiss. Oh, how are you feeling?

0:45:520:45:58

It's so tiring. I'm so nervous as well! Oh, my God!

0:45:580:46:01

I'd like to thank Betty. Where is Betty?

0:46:010:46:05

APPLAUSE

0:46:050:46:07

And I'd like to thank Leigh.

0:46:070:46:10

And then, finally...

0:46:120:46:15

I'd like to thank my mum who's...

0:46:150:46:18

Oh, pull yourself together, woman!

0:46:190:46:23

-I've a bus to catch!

-She's supported me through everything, helping me.

0:46:240:46:28

It costs a lot of money to look this cheap

0:46:280:46:32

and somebody needs to pay for it and she's done that for me.

0:46:320:46:37

CHEERING

0:46:370:46:39

I'll come back out so you can look close at my makeup and pick faults with it.

0:46:400:46:46

So I'll be out with youse in a few minutes.

0:46:470:46:50

The one, the only Miss Fifi Latrue!

0:46:500:46:53

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:46:530:46:56

Oh, my God, Sam!

0:46:560:46:58

That was... Oh, it was amazing.

0:46:580:47:01

That was fantastic.

0:47:010:47:04

It was amazing, son. You were amazing. Everyone thinks you're fabulous.

0:47:040:47:09

I thought it was phenomenal. Just so fluid.

0:47:120:47:15

One of the other performers is so impressed by Jamie that he has a surprise proposal for him.

0:47:150:47:22

-How would you like to perform at Newcastle Pride in the cabaret tent?

-When's that?

-16th July.

0:47:220:47:29

-You have thousands of people there. It's a lot of exposure.

-You never know.

0:47:290:47:35

-So just keep your makeup on.

-Yeah!

-We do that all the time!

0:47:350:47:40

I'm glad you had a nice time.

0:47:400:47:42

You'll knock them dead.

0:47:420:47:45

Now your audience awaits you, darling.

0:47:450:47:49

Hello!

0:47:500:47:52

Whoo!

0:47:520:47:53

-He looked really natural.

-We're very proud.

0:48:030:48:07

-Don't feel anything.

-Jamie, you look beautiful.

0:48:070:48:10

-What is that digging in my back?

-My hand.

0:48:110:48:15

I know if I don't go to prom now I'll look back in even a week's time

0:48:340:48:39

and go, "I wish I'd done that!"

0:48:390:48:41

So I'm gonna do it.

0:48:410:48:44

Two weeks later, the day of the prom has finally arrived.

0:48:510:48:56

Still unsure whether the school will let him through the door,

0:48:560:49:01

Jamie is preparing for the biggest night of his life.

0:49:010:49:05

I've wanted this day for so long. Now I'm doing this for me even before I get to face the critics.

0:49:050:49:12

I'm not gonna let those people think they've changed me.

0:49:120:49:16

You've tried to make me weak and you haven't. You've made me stronger.

0:49:180:49:23

That's what this is about.

0:49:230:49:26

-Jamie, I've got this for you.

-Aww...

-It's not a present. It's just a little letter.

-Thank you.

0:49:260:49:33

-I wanted you to have it before prom.

-Oh, you're so cute.

0:49:350:49:40

'Dear Jamie, writing letters isn't something I do very often, so count yourself lucky.

0:49:400:49:47

'Looking back over the years, I can't believe how much you've developed as a person,

0:49:480:49:54

'but the real change started only a few months ago.' Don't cry! Your makeup!

0:49:540:50:00

I don't know what to say!

0:50:010:50:04

'I can't forget the first time I saw you dancing around in your heels.

0:50:050:50:10

'There are no words to express just how proud I am of you and how much you mean to me.'

0:50:110:50:18

Oh, it's not a good idea any more! Help!

0:50:190:50:22

'You're like my best friend and the brother I never had, all in one.'

0:50:220:50:27

-I'm going to pass out.

-'You're brave, strong and more courageous than any other boy I've ever known.'

0:50:270:50:35

Jamie's meeting friends to have photos taken in the park before going on to prom.

0:50:380:50:44

Jamie!

0:50:450:50:46

-You're gorgeous.

-I am so dying right now!

-Here we are.

0:50:460:50:50

-No, Jamie, you look gorgeous.

-They're lush.

0:50:500:50:55

-Are you ready?

-Yeah.

0:50:550:50:57

It's not Jamie! It's Fifi, everyone!

0:51:000:51:03

No haters, please, no haters.

0:51:030:51:05

-You look gorgeous, Jamie.

-Hi!

-I can't believe I'm doing this.

0:51:140:51:18

Hi, Jamie.

0:51:180:51:21

-Do you think he'll get in?

-Yes.

0:51:220:51:26

I'll give him a dance.

0:51:270:51:30

-At least I'm the only one in black.

-We just all accepted him.

0:51:300:51:34

# Where are we? #

0:51:340:51:37

But these are Jamie's friends.

0:51:370:51:40

# What the hell

0:51:400:51:43

# Is going on? #

0:51:430:51:46

What will his teachers and the rest of the year think?

0:51:460:51:51

# The dust has only just begun to form

0:51:510:51:57

# Crop circles in the carpet... #

0:51:580:52:01

From this point on, the crew do not have permission to film.

0:52:010:52:06

But one of his friends has a small home video camera.

0:52:080:52:12

SHRIEKS AND CHEERING

0:52:120:52:14

Hi, guys!

0:52:150:52:17

Everyone's getting a hug.

0:52:230:52:25

Jamie has told his teachers that he would come in a suit.

0:52:250:52:30

He's turned up and all the kids are dead excited. They've all come to see him.

0:52:300:52:35

One of the teachers spoke to Jamie and said he was told not to come.

0:52:350:52:40

Before the teachers can deliver their verdict, parents and students jump to defend Jamie's actions.

0:52:460:52:52

The kids are saying that if he doesn't go in, they're not going in.

0:53:020:53:06

At last, Jamie has his answer.

0:53:100:53:13

Fifi will go to the ball.

0:53:160:53:19

Oh! Wig!

0:53:200:53:22

All the kids kicked off and they wanted him in.

0:53:220:53:26

She was a bit adamant about it, but she's come back and she said, yes, he can go in.

0:53:260:53:32

-Oh, excellent, excellent.

-So that was it. Great.

0:53:320:53:36

-Oh, good, good. His mam will be dead pleased, then.

-Yeah.

0:53:360:53:40

Hello?

0:53:400:53:42

I've got so much more than I wanted.

0:53:530:53:56

People are more accepting than I thought they were gonna be.

0:53:580:54:03

Everybody, the parents, all of the students outside, stood up for me. "You have to let him in."

0:54:030:54:10

I'm not alone, like.

0:54:100:54:13

I had these people fighting for me and it just felt great that I have got support.

0:54:130:54:18

'Well, this morning I just woke up and I had two messages.'

0:54:350:54:39

One was off Orange and, em, one was off Dad.

0:54:390:54:45

Basically saying that he's not happy at my decision

0:54:450:54:50

to go to prom the way I did

0:54:500:54:53

and, apparently,

0:54:530:54:56

I've ruined everybody's night

0:54:560:54:59

for my own...self gain.

0:54:590:55:02

And, at the end...

0:55:020:55:06

it sounds like he doesn't really want to see me again.

0:55:060:55:11

I told him this big thing about me wanting to be a drag queen,

0:55:160:55:21

face to face with him, and he's done this over text. How childish is that, eh?

0:55:210:55:28

I'm not bothered. I'm not gonna cry in my room that I haven't got his support. I'm not gonna fight for it.

0:55:280:55:35

He'll come round when he's ready.

0:55:350:55:38

MUSIC: "Hey, Big Spender"

0:55:410:55:44

# Wouldn't you like to have fun... #

0:55:480:55:50

'Doing this the whole way through, I thought people would stereotype me as this seedy drag queen.'

0:55:500:55:58

# ..good time

0:55:580:56:00

# Let me show you a... #

0:56:000:56:03

'But it's been me that's been stereotyping people.'

0:56:030:56:07

-# The minute you walked in... #

-'I was the wrong one, thinking the worst of people.'

0:56:070:56:14

-# A real big spender... #

-'I looked at prom as the end.

0:56:140:56:18

'It's not really. It's just the beginning.'

0:56:180:56:21

# ..going on in my mind?

0:56:210:56:23

# So let me get right to the point

0:56:230:56:26

# I don't pop my cork For every guy I see

0:56:260:56:32

# Hey, big spender

0:56:330:56:36

# Hey, big spender

0:56:370:56:40

# Hey, big spender

0:56:410:56:44

# Spend

0:56:450:56:48

# A little time with me! #

0:56:480:56:52

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