Bob Larbey - A Tribute

The comedy writer Bob Larbey died recently at the age of 79.

He and his writing partner John Esmonde

wrote some of the funniest and best-loved comedies

of the 20th century.

Please Sir!, Brush Strokes,

Ever Decreasing Circles - all thanks to them.

And of course, the comedy

that launched my own television career -

The Good Life.

They were sharp observers of suburban life,

and their cleverly-crafted words

gave us all a glimpse behind the net curtains

of some of the best-loved comedy characters ever written.

Your tea and biscuits, Miss Farnaby.

You didn't knock.

Sorry.

Mr Hedges!

Two hours on the square to bring the roses back to your little cheeks,

and then... How very nice of you to come!

-Just the one, Mrs Wembley?

-Just the one, Sam.

Oh, damn and blast.

What now?

I need a pee.

You pig!!

Veronica - I lo... I lo...

Huh?

I'll, er, get a taxi cos we'll be able to drink tonight.

Why have you taken to changing in the bathroom?

Vanity, I suppose.

Bits of me that used to ripple tend to wobble these days.

Jerry, home.

Born in 1934, Bob Larbey was the youngest son of a carpenter,

and grew up in Lambeth, South London.

He was educated at the Henry Thornton School in Clapham,

which is where he met John Esmonde.

They became lifelong friends,

and eventually, writing partners.

After completing National Service,

they both found themselves in humdrum jobs

that did little to stimulate them.

To escape the tedium,

Bob and John began writing comedy material together.

They submitted a few sketches to BBC Radio,

and eventually, they were writing for shows like

I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again.

'Making only their 83rd appearance on BBC Radio,

'it's the new, improved I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again!'

Then, their first television situation comedy came in 1966,

with Room At The Bottom.

But their big break came on ITV in 1968,

when they captured the funny side of their South London school days

and Please Sir! was born.

BELL RINGS

Is that your car...in my playground?

-Yes, it is.

-Oh, mobile, are we?

It gets me away quicker from you lot, Duffy.

Well, Mr Potter, it's taxed and insured.

It is parked directly over my manhole cover.

Now, what would have happened?

I say, what would have happened if I'd been down there?

Ah... Well now, look -

if I'd have thought there was any possibility of that, Mr Potter,

I'd have brought a steam roller to school

and left it there over the weekend.

Please Sir! had been turned down by the BBC,

so its success must have smarted.

But the BBC weren't so slow on the uptake

once the next script landed on their doorstep.

-Oh, you shouldn't have bothered!

-All our love!

-You can't afford it!

-No!

I should have a look at them first, mate.

At the time, Esmonde and Larbey were both approaching 40.

So, they again drew on their own experience

of reaching that landmark age,

and wondering what life was all about.

Richard Briers was approaching 40 as well.

"Mozart and Mendelssohn were dead by 40 -

"why aren't you?"

How thoughtful.

They had originally considered setting the show

on a yacht, and having the Goods sail out of the rat race that way.

Instead, they brilliantly captured the spirit of the times

and made the Goods dig up their Surbiton garden instead.

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

Now, that IS a miracle!

If one of you so much as sniggers, I'm going straight back indoors.

Margot Leadbetter is one of those characters

who come along once in a blue moon.

Ghastly and vulnerable, lovable and maddening,

she was a delight to play.

I have itemised the components of my rates bill scrupulously.

As every citizen should, Mrs Leadbetter.

I am not a citizen, I am a resident.

I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come round here like this.

Oh, heavens above, dear, we're old friends - what does it matter?

Lift up a moment, would you?

Yes. Oh, just a moment. All right, Jenny, I'm coming!

That was Jenny... calling from her sick bed.

-Margot!

-Good evening, Tom.

Good evening. What are you doing?

Evening, Barbara. I'm so sorry.

You said eight, which I took to mean eight for 8.30,

which naturally implies that we should arrive at 8.15, doesn't it?

It's still only 8.14.

The Good Life mixture of sharp observation and big heart

assured Esmonde and Larbey's place in the comedy pantheon.

Ah!

Yes! An unpretentious little peapod Burgundy,

but I think you'll like its impudent charm. Mm-hmm...!

Does it travel?

Travel? All of ten feet.

There we are - Chateau Good, '75.

Whoops!

Now, look, love - we've got to expect setbacks.

We've just had one - let's put it behind us and battle on.

-To the future.

-To the future.

SHE GASPS

If that's the future, I'm going to kill myself!

Hoh!

It's hurting the back of my eyes.

-Look for the good in all men, hey, Matthew?

-Yes, indeed.

Well, don't waste your time with me because there ain't none!

Right, you lot...!

For their next venture, the pair returned

to their National Service days, in Get Some In!

It told the story of a hapless bunch of RAF recruits in 1955,

and launched the career of Robert Lindsay.

Oh, cor, blimey, look at it!

'Ere, feel that.

Esther Williams could have a swim in that.

-That's pneumonia for the lot of us.

-There are no curtains!

And they reckon the Gorbals is slums.

I'd as soon be stuck in Barlinnie for two years.

I ain't standing for this - I know my rights.

Did I hear you mention rights?

-Yeah.

-Well, you're a National Serviceman -

you haven't got any rights.

I could complain to an officer.

Yes, you can do that - providing you go through the correct channels.

Right - what's the correct channels then?

Me!

Now get this, and get this straight.

My name is Marsh -

B-A-S-T-A-R-D, Marsh!

Larbey and Esmonde continued to write together

throughout the late '70s.

And then in 1982, Bob had his first solo success,

when he teamed real-life husband and wife Judi Dench and Michael Williams

in his first romantic comedy.

About last night, erm...

Yeah, now, now, look, Mike - we're both grown-up,

we don't have to analyse things.

We don't have to give it ratings out of ten!

We... What ABOUT last night?

Well, I was, er,

I was just going to say I'm...

glad that it's out of the way.

-Out of the way?

-Well, no, no - I...

No, I didn't mean it to sound like that.

Wh-What I mean to say is, well, there was a...

-a sort of barrier...

-Oh!

-..between us,

-and now that we're over it...

-Over it...

-..well, it should release some of the...tension, and...

-..tensions.

-Yes.

-And we can be...

We can be more er, re... Er...

-More relaxed.

-..relaxed, yes.

-Oh, yes, yes.

-More...more easy.

-Easy. Oh, yes.

Back again with John Esmonde,

Ever Decreasing Circles hit the screens in 1984.

Richard Briers returned to play the monstrous Martin Bryce,

giving him JUST enough vulnerability to make the audience love him.

It was another huge hit.

Here's a poser.

What's everybody's favourite jam?

ALL: Oh...

Oh, well...

I'd have to go for Hilda's cherry.

I've got a funny one, I have.

Marrow and ginger!

I'm a straight up and down damson.

Strawberry for me.

-Martin?

-Well, now, if you're pushing me into a corner about it,

blackcurrant.

Oh! What about you, Anne?

Raspberry.

Their next stroke of genius came in the shape

of a painter and decorator called Jacko,

with an eye for the ladies and the gift of the gab -

drawing from their brief stint as wall painters.

She intends to kill you.

I mean, do you seriously think the level of your remarks

contains any wit at all?

I've heard them all before - bowling a maiden over,

fine leg, slip...

The only one you missed out was "whoops" when I bend down.

Do men really say that, then?

Probably useless at the game itself.

I'd like to see you looking so smug if you were out in the middle

facing Sheila's bouncers.

Now, you said that, Linda, not me.

In 1992, Bob Larbey went solo again,

and wrote the beautifully-observed As Time Goes By -

another project for Judi Dench.

But this time, her sparring partner was the wonderful Geoffrey Palmer.

Would you like to come?

Why?

Well...

Something to do.

-It would get you out.

-What do you mean, it would get me out?

I don't spend the evenings knitting

with an old shawl round my shoulders!

Get ME out, then.

Well, you're going anyway.

Look, I don't see what all the fuss is about, it's perfectly simple -

I'm asking you to a party, all you have to do is say yes or no.

Oh, all right.

No.

During his quietly brilliant career,

Bob wrote and co-wrote over 450 TV episodes,

each running around 50 pages,

and often written on a typewriter at his kitchen table.

His writing was sublimely funny,

and his characters masterfully constructed

and inherently human.

I would say they were more miniature drama than situation comedy,

touching on the light and shade of real life.

To me, he was a master.

But to those who didn't know him personally,

he opened up the hilarious world of ornamental ponds,

Neighbourhood Watch, mismatched romance,

naughty boys...

and pot-bellied pigs.

And all I'd like to say is,

thank you very much, Bob.

You and John made us laugh -

a lot!

And...one, two, three, one, two, three...

-What's the matter with you?

-Stand on your beds!!

Do sit down!

# ..Last song together

# There's no other way

# We can say goodbye. #