Charlotte Church: In Her Own Voice

This programme contains very strong language.

I've totally changed musical direction and, um...I've just tried

to be a bit more under the radar because essentially, fame sucks.

So I have...

I don't know, I just wanted to sort of do things on my own terms

and be a creative entity without having to be sort of paraded around

and put my face on and wear some pretty shoes and all of that BS.

# Panis angelicus...#

At 12, she found fame as the Voice of an Angel.

Candles everywhere! Hundreds and hundreds of candles!

In her teens, she became the wild child, hounded by press.

Get your fucking hands off my camera!

I really, really can't stand him.

And tried her hand at pop.

# I love it when you call my name...#

Aw, I was so little! Didn't have a clue!

Now aged 28, Charlotte Church is on a new journey.

Creating her own music and doing it her way.

I want to do some things on my own terms,

from my own weird, creative brain,

which has developed rather weirdly due to my crazy life!

This is the story of two extraordinary weeks

in the life Charlotte Church...

I literally spent the entirety of Sunday just having a cry.

..As she puts on two big concerts to showcase her new music.

People are going to be watching this at home in Wales, like,

"Oh, well, I don't know. I was a bit confused.

"She looked rather strange most of the time."

I'm sorry, people of Wales.

I got a bit weird.

February, 2014.

Charlotte and her band gather in Cardiff

for two weeks of intensive rehearsal.

I'm releasing a new EP, EP Four,

and we have basically got a ridiculously small amount of time

in which to put on a huge show

which has got this crazy concert

which is sort of performance-arty and this, that and the other.

It's going to be pretty manic.

# And then a voice said

# Can you hear me now? #

We're not like a band who sort of just turns up

and does a rock'n'roll thing. We rehearse a lot.

Which is really sad.

# O-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h. #

But the music is quite complicated

and there's loads of interlocking parts

and loads of stuff going on,

so we've got to, otherwise it would be total carnage.

CHARLOTTE HARMONISES

That was sort of interesting. What were you doing?

# I can dream

# I can dream. #

I sort of got disillusioned with music and stuff and the whole shebang

and I was thinking about moving away

to a hut in, er...Nepal.

And so... And then I sort of thought, "No, I have to do music.

"I have to sing." I just have to. It's not really a choice.

Um...it's a compulsion.

After a break from the music industry and the limelight,

Charlotte has come back with a completely new sound.

MUSIC: "Nerve" by Charlotte Church

It's jam-packed full of rhythms

and, um...funk and loads of riffs

and lots of hooks.

# Are you just a waste of my time?

# Have I let it slip? #

It's really intense music

and it's an assault on the senses a lot of the time.

And you have to think about it. It's not really, like,

chuck it on in the background, a bit of easy listening.

# Yeah.#

But without the might a major record label behind her,

Charlotte faces the daunting task

of winning over the music industry with her new image and sound.

She started by revealing her new band

at an undercover gig in Cardiff.

This is the stage upstairs in Clwb Ifor Bach

where we first put Charlotte Church on.

We didn't call her Charlotte Church, we called her Banded Puma.

Bit worried that people wouldn't come

if it was Charlotte Church,

so we thought we'd come up with an anagram of a made-up band.

And then realised an anagram of made-up band was Banded Puma.

So in the programme for the festival,

we put Banded Puma on between a couple of other acts.

There were 200 people here.

People suddenly realised, "Oh, is that Charlotte Church?"

I think they were expecting to hate it.

I was listening a lot and people were, like,

"That was quite good, wasn't it?

"That was all right, wasn't it?" People tweeting about it.

So it's really exciting to be part of it. Um...

Yeah, really special moment to be the first person

to put her on with this new project.

I think it must be very difficult for her to overcome

some prejudices against her because people go,

"It's Charlotte Church, Voice of an Angel, pop star,

"Issues and Tissues."

And she's a million miles from that.

So to overcome those obstacles

and people's thoughts of her must be quite hard.

# She'll wait

# She'll wait

# She'll w-a-a-a-a-ait

# And I rise. #

It's 16 years since I've sort of being doing this singing lark

and people have known me for it. Um...

Yeah, and it's been a crazy ride.

A really strange, unique,

weirdly-psychological at times,

totally exhilarating way of living, really.

"To tell us more about Caroline, we have her niece, Charlotte Church."

APPLAUSE

It all started back in 1997

when Charlotte gave an impromptu performance

on The Big Big Talent Show with Jonathan Ross.

So Caroline's your auntie. She sings, I know, beautifully.

Um...I know you have a great voice, as well.

Will you give us a little burst?

-Can I get a C off the orchestra?

-C off the orchestra?

You can try. They haven't been hitting them this evening.

-ORCHESTRA PLAYS NOTE

-There you go, C.

# Pie Jesu

# Pie Jesu

# Qui Tollis peccata mundi

# Dona eis requiem...#

Charlotte signed a five-album deal with Sony Music.

Within months, her face was everywhere

and the Voice of an Angel had sold over a million.

Life for the 12-year-old from Cardiff would never be the same again.

I went from just going to school

and just doing all of the normal stuff,

my mother worked in the council,

going to my nana's for tea afterwards

and then my mother would pick me up from my nana's

and whatever routines we had as a family

into this crazy life of travelling the world

and singing all over the shop

and staying in these really incredible hotels.

Yeah, I'm a Canton girl, so it was all a bit like, "What is going on?"

You're going to meet lots of different types of journalists.

Some of them are going to be nice, some are going to be a bit nasty

and some of them are going to seem nice, but be nasty.

When you're a child, you just tend to just go with it.

You just go with the flow and nothing really fazed me.

-Let me introduce you first to Leah Sydney here.

-Hello!

Hello. Nice to meet you.

I think for the whole time, I sort of had a good perspective about things.

I don't know how, I don't know why.

But I've always understood that all of that stuff wasn't very important.

It wasn't the be-all and end-all.

What was the be-all and end-all was the fact that I had my family

and friends and everybody was healthy and everything was fine.

And that's all... I've sort of kept that. Everybody's fine!

Everything is OK.

And all of the rest of it is just, um...is work.

# Amazing Grace... #

From an unknown 11-year-old to a star,

singing before the President in under three years.

I feel like I sang for the world and his wife when I was younger.

Um...the Pope, two presidents, President Clinton and George Bush.

All the royals numerous times!

Er...yeah.

And I met loads of incredible people, as well.

I met Tom Cruise, I met Muhammad Ali,

I've met David Bowie, I've met loads of incredible people.

But I stay away from it all. I haven't got any celebrity friends.

I already had so much paparazzi attention, the last thing

I wanted to do was increase it by hanging out with other famous people.

So I just came home to Chippy Lane, really.

LAUGHTER

I'll just go down Caroline Street, it'll be fine. I don't need London.

Yeah.

The most remarkable thing about Charlotte Church,

considering the things she's done in her life,

which I don't think any of us

will come close to half or a quarter of what she's achieved,

she's reached the highest levels of performance

in terms of artistic endeavour in so many aspects of her carer.

And she's still sort of Charlotte Church from Cardiff.

I think if I'd have done any of those things,

I'd be living in a mansion in LA by now.

Sometimes people really prod me to sort of try and, er...make me break.

"Oh, but it must have hurt at some point in your life.

"You must have missed out." I don't really...

Because I don't have any other experience

of what I was missing out on or whatever, I just don't...

But also, my life is so full and so rich,

um...that I feel like I've definitely had a good side of the deal.

I'm very happy to present you finally

with your double platinum award.

APPLAUSE

Charlotte went on to sell over 10 million albums worldwide.

I've been getting investigated by the taxman year on year

because the papers keep printing I'm worth £9 million, £11 million,

£22 million, £25 million.

So the taxman's looking in my account going,

"Where are you hiding all this money, then?"

I'm like, "There isn't that. It's a lie." Yeah.

So it's always been massively exaggerated

because it makes a better story. But I will have to work.

I will have to work for the rest of my life. I can't just sit back and...

Not only because I'd be totally tonto,

but because, er...because I have to.

There are less than two weeks to go until Charlotte's reveals

her new work to the press at two big concerts in London and Cardiff.

And she is project-managing the shows herself.

I've been running about all day.

Didn't realise I was going to be filmed.

I would've put some face on otherwise. Um...but there we are.

I haven't actually even brushed my hair.

Sorry! Genuinely, I'm a bit like this.

I just sort of walk around the Canton, Cardiff area

just looking like a bag lady.

Really. Um...

But I'm not eccentric, honest.

I've got massively into science and physics recently.

I say massively, I read the New Scientist.

And I have dreams of going to university to do a degree in physics.

Um...and anyway, there's a lot of songs on EP Four,

which is the EP I'm about to release,

which is what the show's basically based around, um...

which are sort of...

some of them are sort of a little bit scientific in nature.

For example, there's a song called Entanglement,

which is about entanglement theory,

which is a quantum, mechanics quantum physics sort of thing.

Um...

Which is a really complicated physics theory

which I don't want to describe to you now

because I will probably get it horribly wrong

and sound like a silly lady.

Charlotte arrives at the studios of sculptor, Rowley Clay,

to plan the centrepiece for her science-inspired stage show.

Hello!

-Hi, Charlotte.

-How's it going?

What the show is, the first half is a slightly different thing.

The first half will mostly be all of our up-tempo material,

it should be loads of fun, all bathed in, like, UV black light stuff.

Giving the audience tubes of neon

so hopefully they can paint their faces

and be totally involved with it, as well.

Rowley is making a metal cage-like skirt

that Charlotte will wear during the show.

I was getting the image that actually, you've got more...

-You know, like the skirt's more of a thing.

-Yeah!

-You know?

Everybody's going to go out for the intermission

-and when they come back in, the skirt will be set in place.

-OK, yeah.

So that even when they walk in and it's just like,

"What on earth is that?" It just looks odd.

-Like a sculpture, like a light sculpture.

-Yeah, yeah.

It's weird to think, really, that she is doing it all herself.

People who say they're doing it all themselves often have

people higher up with lots of money to help them with.

And, you know, with very influential music business friends.

But she really is doing it all on her own

and she seems to be loving it and savouring every moment.

So they'll have the lights, but hopefully they'll be sequenced

so they cascade with different coloured lights going down.

There's more of these lights and they sort of start snaking out.

It needs to flow straight from the lines of light off of the skirt.

And it will just look like this weird tentacle fish thing.

She seems to be taking on the role of an ambassador

for people who want to do it themselves, as well.

It's almost as if it's a new world, which is fascinating, really.

I think a lot of people who go to the gigs will be, like, "Why? Why?

"You know, we're just here to watch some music.

"Can you stop making it so complicated?"

Although she's planning the show alone,

it's not a one-man band when it comes to the music.

In 2010, Charlotte met her partner, musician Jonathan Powell.

And the pair started writing together.

# Flood my lungs

# Won't you pull me out...#

It's not, "Pull!"

# Pull me out. #

My mother has known his mother for a long time

and my mother had been banging on about him for ages.

"He's got an incredible voice. He's such a great songwriter."

Then I eventually met up with him and heard some of his stuff

and then we started writing together

and I really found my feet as a writer and he really supported me

and gave me loads of confidence.

Because I'd never really thought of myself as a writer either.

And he was, like, "Yeah, you are. Yeah, you just can be.

"You can do whatever you want."

-Can we stick on one problem at a time, please?

-Yeah.

-Um...

-Ending.

The ending of that section.

Creatively, we...we're on a similarish sort of wavelength,

but I can get a bit Veruca Salt about stuff, as well.

I scream and scream until I'm sick! I don't, actually. That's not true.

I'm totally reasonable.

I don't want you to make it anything else! If you want it elongated, do...

# De-neh-neh-neh-neh-neh-neh-neh. #

So it just feels like it's on a loop.

Oh! I've got to go out and have a fag.

Over the past two years,

the pair have been creating a series of EPs

all recorded at Charlotte's home studio.

This is the live room.

So this is generally where, like, generally,

Johnny will be playing the guitar by there, he'll have his amp in the toilet

because that's the best isolation of sound we can do.

We had the choir in the house because they wouldn't really all fit in here.

There was about 18 of them.

# Mountain water. #

So that was interesting.

The dogs were, like, "What's going on? What the hell is this?"

Waa-aa-ter.

# Mountain water. #

I've never, ever considered myself really a very creative entity before.

I bloody well do now!

LAUGHTER

But, um...that's only because I've really pushed myself, I feel.

Um...yeah.

And it's been an incredible thing to do.

Charlotte's creative journey doesn't end with the music or the gigs.

It's really fucking cold!

Whether it means freezing in a river...

While I'm singing, I'm trying to push my bottom lip,

but it's starting to...

..or covering her face with glitter...

# I've got glitter in my wounds...#

..there are music videos to produce.

# Since I was glitterbombed by you... #

And with the release of the new EP just few weeks away,

Charlotte needs to take valuable time out

from planning her shows to shoot her latest video.

I'm filming a video for Little Movements, which is...

Sorry, and I'm poorly, so I'm feeling really sorry for myself.

Shall we have a little practice, guys?

Really, a prize.

She's decided to film in her home town, starting at a local primary school.

I've lived in Cardiff all my life.

I love Cardiff, but I've never really done anything here

in terms of work and stuff,

so I just thought maybe I should do an awesome video here

and just get all the people of Cardiff to just come and dance.

I love it. It's just home. There is no place like home!

That was super-awesome!

Ghetto blaster in hand, Charlotte hits the streets of Cardiff

to persuade people to dance for her music video.

Hey, guys. We're filming a music video in Cardiff.

Basically, we're just going around to all different places in Cardiff

and asking people to do, like a 20 or 30 second dance.

I'm not dancing. Sorry!

-What have I got to do, Char?

-Dance like nobody's watching.

-How's that?

-Nice!

-Oh, we're rocking now!

I like the people.

I really like the people. I think the people are great. Um...

I love the history.

I don't like the weather all the time, but apart from that,

you know, everything about it, the landscape, I love it.

I love Wales.

MUSIC: "Little Movements" by Charlotte Church

LAUGHTER

Next stop, the betting shop to meet Grandad.

My bampy comes here to have a little flutter on the gee-gees occasionally.

Which I also don't condone. I don't know, I don't know. Whatever!

But, er...Yeah,

so I just thought we'd get him in his natural environment.

-You ready?

-Yeah. What we doing?

-We're going to go straight to it.

He's got a new knee, so that one should be quite groovy.

It should be able to do a bit of the old...twist and whatnot.

Won't last long before the legs start to give up.

LAUGHTER

He's totally awesome. He's loved wherever he goes.

He is Mr Gary Cooper.

-Thank you.

-All right, sweetheart? All right, darling?

I'll see you after.

Word of Charlotte's video shoot has got out to the press.

-Where have all these guys come from?

-Sorry?

And it's not long before the paparazzi show up.

Guys, out of the frame!

I know they're people as well and everybody's got to make a living,

but that's a pretty low living, just to wait around for people.

It's creepy. Sorry. Whichever way you look at it, it's just creepy.

# With all respect

# I have to tell you you're incorrect

# What you won't buy you wouldn't get...#

At the height of her fame, Charlotte was hounded by the paparazzi.

It was horrendous! It was horrendous for years and years.

There would literally just be, like, four or five guys

sat outside my front door from morning to night.

Just following me wherever I went.

I just want to go.

This press intrusion reached its peak

when Charlotte got together

with Welsh rugby star, Gavin Henson, in 2005.

It was tough. It was really tough at the time.

And I am very, very happy

that I don't have to deal with that any more.

Because if somebody was waiting outside my door nowadays

with my kids...I'd just go off.

There was a couple of times... See, that's when it...

There was a couple of times when they turned up at the kids' school, or,

you know, they followed me with the kids and then I was just, like...

"I will kill you. Get out of my face now, before I kill you."

# You just want to see

# See the other side of me

# And you don't know...#

That same year, the Voice of an Angel became the voice of pop

when Charlotte said goodbye to classical

and released her album, Tissues and Issues.

# I love it when you call my name

# I love it when you call my name...#

LAUGHTER

I haven't really got that much to say about that period of my life.

Er... A, just because I feel like, I've said it all.

B, there was all manner of tabloid shit going on at the time,

um...but I just don't think it's very interesting any more.

I'd never really written before, um...so I was just writing

with lots of different people and this, that and the other.

See if you can do that last note, Charlotte, just straight.

Don't go into your viv at all.

# The situation's up to you...#

She was kind of semi-successful at it, I think.

I mean, it wasn't Britney Spears,

but it wasn't embarrassing by any stretch of the imagination.

"And now there is no need to lie, I know the truth, just tell me why.

"Why you were unfaithful."

I listen back to some of the songs and think,

"Aw, I was so little. Didn't have a clue!"

Charlotte reached number two with her single, Crazy Chick.

# You're driving me to insanity

# All the things you do, you make me come unglued

# I just can't help myself

# I need professional help, help

# I need professional help. #

But from the moment she turned 16, the press were on the attack.

All the headlines, they just wrote themselves.

"Angel Falls from Grace," this, that and the other.

Um...though my favourite headline was,

"Charlotte the Scruff has a Puff."

That was the first time they ever caught me smoking!

Generally, headlines are, like, "Oh, come on!

"You could've thought of something a lot wittier than that!"

But, "Charlotte the Scruff has a Puff,"

because I was in joggers with a fag on,

which they said was a huge rollup,

as though trying to insinuate that I was smoking weed of something.

It was a Berkeley Menthol.

Um... But, yeah. I've never been a wild child.

I was probably more responsible then than I am now.

I'm pretty responsible, to be fair. Um... But...

It was a beautiful stereotype for the press to be able to shape and mould.

And I wasn't willing to curb my behaviour

because somebody else thought what I was doing was outrageous. I was...

I always said... And sometimes my nan used to be, like,

"Oh, but, come on, love, maybe just stay in

"or, you know, have a drink in the house with your friends."

I was like, "No. You know, I'm 18, 19,

"I want to go out and dance and, you know,

"socialise with other people, like a normal human."

If I did start curtailing my life and my behaviour and everything

to what other people thought it should be, then I'd be a wreck now.

# Why

# Are we

# Tangled up?

# Interrelated... #

Back at home in Cardiff,

the Entanglement concerts are just a week away.

This is so aggressive, Jonny.

It is.

ROCK MUSIC

No!

Charlotte calls a meeting with her friend and set designer Jo

and lighting designer Argie.

This is Argie.

-Hello. You all right?

-Do you want a cup of tea or coffee?

-Coffee would be lovely.

-Real coffee?

-Yeah, absolutely.

Darling, I don't do instant!

So, within the Entanglement concert, there are two halves -

the first half and the second half - aptly named, I thought.

In the first half...

They've both got quite different feels, so

whilst the whole thing was supposed to be about trying to

break down some barriers

between the audience and performer,

it just doesn't do it for me any more,

just sort of...

Standing on stage and not being

connected to the people that

I'm wanting to be connected to.

Basically, it's a bit like a wormhole.

-OK.

-OK? So all in with the entanglement theory...

You could have two wormholes, one on either side...

Stop!

The first half will, hopefully, feel like a big party -

big crazy, space, physics, entanglement, connected, crazy party.

That's sphere there and that sphere there are two half mirror balls.

That's so cool!

-Yeah.

-Amazing!

The second half has a different feel, so it should feel a bit more...

..Um, a bit more calm, a bit more serene...

Erm, a bit moodier, a bit darker.

This is for the teddies on the tentacle lights.

I cannot believe my stupid mind.

Thanks.

Yeah, so basically out from the

skirt/dress/jellyfish/metal/cage thing...

..which should look like a deep-sea jellyfish.

From those lines of light,

for the last two songs,

whilst there are UV bubbles...

These will be covered in fabric as well so they look a bit more,

like...organic.

Like an organism, rather than a strip of rope lights.

And people will be attached to them.

And then there's a choir in the second half, a 14-piece choir -

London Contemporary Voices.

But we've hardly had any rehearsal with them,

so, fingers crossed.

My brain's just going to start dripping out through my nostrils

and my ear holes in a minute.

I really feel like it is totally melted.

It's going to leave my body in protest.

PHONE BEEPS

Look at this - this is just all questions.

Just questions about this bloody show.

SHE SIGHS

With Jo, Argie and the tentacles on track, Charlotte heads

back to see sculptor Rowley Clay to finalise plans

for her metal skirt centre piece.

What I wanted to do was to measure your waist.

OK.

Oh, Christ, this is embarrassing - on camera as well!

You might have to turn it off!

That could work, but when we do the metal bars,

they just need to come out quickly.

-Yeah.

-Sort of, you know...

To accommodate my arse.

Accommodate your...

SHE LAUGHS

..form.

-Your rounded form.

-Yes, absolutely.

I'll be doing a lot of this, obviously.

Go round, do a bit of this.

-Yeah?

-Bit of this.

Three-foot circumference.

You heard it here. My waist is three foot!

THEY LAUGH

The next morning,

and it's the final rehearsal before the first of the two concerts.

THEY JAM

We're pretty much sorted.

We've still got bits and bobs of tightening up to do.

My throat's a bit sore.

Which sucks.

SOUND EFFECT FROM GUITAR

Just keep it simple. It's not difficult.

Do you want to do it then?

-What?

-If it's not so difficult?

It's not too difficult, keep it simple, is what I'm saying.

As the pressure of the final rehearsal rises, Charlotte

receives news that an interview she has done has created a storm.

I had an interview with Stylist Magazine,

just to make sure that people know about the EP and the gigs and stuff.

Anyway, I must have got a bit ranty, but I don't really realise

when I do it. And I don't realise that other people don't.

I basically said that Piers Morgan was a prick,

'when I met him when I was 17.'

And the one thing that gets my goat is the increasingly large number

of whingeing, whining, prima donna celebrities,

who've got nothing better to do with their lazy good-for-nothing days

than whinge and moan about the newspapers.

He tweeted me a couple of days ago, saying something like...

Because I called him a prick in this interview...

Like, "That's a shame, because I really enjoyed meeting you,

"even though you weren't the brightest bulb in the box...

"or in any box."

And then he's got loads of abuse off people on Twitter and stuff.

Which I shouldn't condone, but I sort do.

I think Charlotte always courts controversy,

regardless of what she says,

probably because she's just very honest and very blunt.

And that's just her personality.

So she always says things as they are, hence the papers love that

and latch onto that.

She's using the media that, at points,

abused her and she's turning it back round and saying,

"OK. I'm coming after you and I'm going to stand up for what's right."

And do you know what? She's right.

-# See the way she hangs her head

-Ah-ah-ah

# If you love her you should tell her why

# And if you ever said life isn't fair

-# This could be your chance... #

-Ah-ahah

Keen to move on and get back to plugging her music,

Charlotte agrees to a phone interview with The Guardian.

Yeah, I'm in the middle of rehearsal, but it's OK.

But it isn't going the way she wants.

You seriously need to do some research, dude,

cos I apologised for that,

cos actually it was an incredibly flippant thing for me to say.

The press have also reported that no-one turned up for Charlotte's

video shoot in Cardiff.

Just not true.

There was loads. There was like... 150 people in the video in the end.

Yeah. All they know how to do is be negative. It's easier.

SHE MOUTHS

I'd describe my relationship with the press as...

Uh...

..Err...

..complicated.

-NEWS READER:

-Charlotte Church has been in the public eye

since she was a teenager.

She described almost daily surveillance,

cameras hidden in her garden,

and offers to boyfriends to talk about her private life.

In 2011, Charlotte gave evidence at the Leveson Enquiry into press

standards and phone hacking.

Why is it OK that an editor,

or someone senior in a newspaper could

pay an unemployed boy from Cardiff

tens of thousands of pounds to

reveal intimate sexual details about another 17-year-old girl?

The police come to you and they say,

"We believe your phone has been hacked."

'I just couldn't believe it,'

but then, could believe it cos loads of stuff made sense.

But the thing is, when it was all happening,

we were saying stuff like, "I swear they're listening.

"They've got to have something.

"This is crazy."

But then, it's so far-fetched, it's so sci-fi,

so Big Brother that you're like,

"No way, that's not possible."

And so, it was just a totally ridiculous, far-out thought.

But then to find out that, actually, there was

lots of stuff going on like that.

Nothing was deemed off-limits by those who pursued me and my family,

just to make money for a multi-national news corporation.

Charlotte at the Leveson was probably the first time

the public got to see a different side of Charlotte Church.

Not necessarily engaging with her musically, but suddenly realising

that this girl, because for a lot of people, she's still a girl,

erm, you know, really had something to say.

We know what a lot of these papers were doing was wrong,

what a lot of the media was portraying wasn't true,

or wasn't healthy and wasn't right.

And she was kind of saying, I'm not going to stand up for it.

And I think that's really brave,

because even though this whole thing was about not

being in the limelight,

the whole enquiry was about not disclosing secrets to the press,

she was putting herself in the limelight to make that point.

And that takes guts.

Of course, she has got an incredible aura,

so the press are fascinated by her.

So anything she says publicly is news,

and it's great that she's used that for something quite powerful.

She's...you know, Voice of an Angel,

and you don't want to be on the wrong end of that voice, do you?!

# Love

# Love

# Love... #

I love my family. They're all bonkers.

But they've been incredible.

We've all been through this crazy experience together really.

And they've been amazing.

And they're totally the reason why I'm...

really normal.

Painfully normal!

They made sure that I wasn't having no airs and graces and this,

that and the other,

and that I'd always remember that I

was a Llandaff girl through and through.

Erm... Yeah, and they're incredible. I love them to bits.

They're totally mad. And I love them.

Oh, Mum!

It was only one teddy and you took it out!

< Charle...

Stop filming me, I'm having a tantrum.

As Charlotte grew up under the media spotlight, her mum Maria was

constantly at her daughter's side.

She was always there making sure...

Loads of stuff with contracts, that lawyers would miss,

cos it's just another job,

she'd be there like, "No, no! No! What about this clause here?"

And whatnot, and making sure amending schedules,

when, you know, I went to Japan for example, they had me scheduled

to be working from like 6:30 in the morning till 10:00 at night,

and she was just like, "I don't think so."

"She's got to do three hours of tuition, she's got to do this,

"that and the other, she's got to sleep."

"And can we have a day off so we can go somewhere fun, cos she's little?"

Are we going to do anything else after this?

I want to go home!

She got a really bad rep for that, you know,

loads of people in the industry used to be like,

"Christ! Maria Church! She's hardcore!"

But, yeah,

A, she was really good at it - did all the business side and everything.

She had a real natural aptitude for that sort of stuff.

And, B, it was me who was going through it all,

so she wasn't going to take any shit from anyone.

Charlotte has now embraced the same protective attitude with her

own children.

I've got two kids, who are five

and six - a boy and a girl.

I had them when I was 21...

I had Ruby when I was 21 and then

I had Dexter when I was...22? Yes, 22.

When they were little, I made some really bad choices

and did some OK Magazine things, which

I felt awful about immediately, and gave all my money away to charity.

Cos I just thought, "This is awful. I can't do this. This is bad."

But it wasn't singularly my choice, et cetera, so on and so forth.

But nowadays, I would never...nothing.

It's just not worth it.

I just want to keep them safe and, you know...

Because they're not, you know, just my tiny little children,

or my possessions, they're little people who have their own minds

and will have their own lives and make decisions for themselves.

And I'm not going to scupper that now.

And that's also, sort of, why I don't really want them in this film.

Wednesday the 5th of March.

Charlotte and the band arrive at the

Riverside Studios in Hammersmith, for the first of her two gigs.

Hi!

-MAN:

-Hello!

-How goes?

-Very good. Very good.

It's all, pretty much working.

But after a manic fortnight, Charlotte is feeling the pressure.

I literally spent the entirety of Sunday just having a cry.

It just all got a bit much for me and I just...

Basically, when I went in the shower in the morning,

the hot water wasn't on, and that was it.

That was it - I was done. I just sort of had a little cry.

But it's fine now.

All is well.

And now, this looks great.

This is Victoria Gugenheim, possibly one of the best names in the world.

Erm... Yeah, and she is a world-class body paint artist.

I've had weirder things put on my face.

That sounds really bad! But, erm...

THEY LAUGH

I'm going to go get a drink, does anyone want one?

Ooh!

Oh!

-What do you fancy?

-Is there any chance of a cup of tea?

-Cup of char?

-Yes, please.

Milk and two sugars, please.

-Two sugars?

-Absolutely. No messing about!

That's how I like it. I'll remember that.

I feel like I'm back in the womb.

CHOIR SINGS

This'll be the first time we've rehearsed with the choir,

which is really scary, cos they're a really big part of the second half.

CHARLOTTE SINGS AND CHOIR HARMONISES

Sounds a bit naive really, but she can really sing!

There's a reason she was the Voice of an Angel,

and there was a reason she was in the chart.

It's cos she's got a really good voice.

On those, "Ah-ooh," can you really get that bottom note right,

so it sounds more like a wolfhound?

So like...

# Ah-ooh... #

# Ah-ooh...#

So really give it a, "Aargh!"

Her voice is just totally flexible.

The fact that she's done a pop career, an opera career,

and now it's lending itself perfectly to something that's

a very high art indeed, being able to use your voice as an instrument.

So, yeah, totally flexible and incredible.

CHOIR HARMONISES Lovely.

That was pretty much the first time we'd heard the choir,

and on the stage and...

We did little bits with the band,

but then we concentrated on the choral group.

It sounded amazing.

Charlotte's partner Jonny has scored all the choir's parts.

We've got the London show,

and we've got a few more rehearsals before we do Cardiff.

So, it's, you know...

We've some time to make some mistakes -

not that I think we'll make any...

Who's dragged the cynic out ya?

But you need a little bit of wiggle room, don't you?

What? I don't want realism right now, thanks.

-OK. It's all going to be perfect.

-Thank you.

Crikey! Ruin the fantasy, man.

But with just a few hours

until the doors open, the pressure is getting to Charlotte.

Look, we haven't got time.

We haven't got time.

We've got an hour left and we've got to do the whole of the second set.

Can we just do this quickly, please?

If you're fucking insisting upon it,

then you need to leave more time, Dave.

You have to leave more time...and maybe don't do that massive

bubble crash thing.

Because it's too much like, "What the fuck's happening now?"

So maybe just start the beat and bring in that bit.

And I'm going to kill you afterwards.

-Can you just go and stand out front, Charlotte?

-No!

This is the first time Charlotte has showcased her new

music on a big stage, and with the press

and her media friends in the crowd there's a lot at stake.

Tonight, I'm just expecting to see Charlotte do her thing.

She never stops surprising me, she's always doing something

ridiculous and out there and experimentational.

And for someone who's lived as much as she has,

and done as much as she has, this is the natural place for her to be.

-FEMALE:

-She goes on at half past.

Yeah, yeah, so...

I get quiet before I go on.

And really miserable.

I've known Charlotte for a few years now.

I remember when she used to have her own show,

and we went on and we did a Christmas duet together.

And I remember being blown away by how powerful her voice was.

So I'm really excited about tonight.

I don't know too much about it, other than...

And I've deliberately blocked a lot of stuff out cos

I just want to be really surprised by the whole thing.

CHARLOTTE SINGS SCALES

CHARLOTTE SINGS SCALES

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

You look great. You look phenomenal.

You look like a Bond villain in a zombie film.

Zombie Bond!

OK. We're going to go to backstage then.

-All right.

-See you later!

-See you in a minute.

SHE SIGHS

OK! Get on stage.

Do you want to stay back?

Do you want to stay back for now, or come on with us?

-You come on last, then.

-OK.

CROWD CHEERS

The next day, and Charlotte has a hectic round of radio

interviews to plug the launch of EP Four.

So that was Charlotte Church's new single Love Alone from her

new EP called Four.

Because of the internet, there are so many people trying to make

music, so it is so difficult to get your voice heard.

I look forward to playing Love Alone every day next week.

Nice. Thanks. Thank you.

The press have also been reacting to her London show.

The reaction has been great after the London gig.

Totally sort of...

..way better than I expected.

I don't know what I was expecting.

But it was really positive, and I'm not used to super-positive stuff.

Generally, always comes with, you know,

a little bit of a dig from some areas of the press or whatever.

Loads of the set pieces we have with the tentacles and the bubbles and the

neon and all of it, it sort of had the exact effect that I wanted it to,

in the way that the audience are massively a part of it,

and really involved.

And then you're just left with a feeling of real goodwill.

It's just like, I don't know,

it just feels really loving and warm and nice.

CROWD CHEERS

Thank you very much. Good night.

But despite the good reviews, it's proving to be an uphill

struggle for Charlotte and the band.

The whole way across, we've been putting loads of love

and energy and passion into this one project,

and it's been falling on deaf ears, to a certain extent.

Like...

It's just not reaching the people that we want it to,

and so this kind of feels a little bit like the last stand -

you, know, all we do...

-It's like Zulu!

-Yeah!

All we can do now is create this thing

and let that be a testament to what we've done in the past

and if, still then,

nobody gives a shit, then,

we're clearly in the wrong industry!

Because of this past, because of this bundle of, you know,

tabloidism that's followed her the whole of her life,

perhaps the credible music press

aren't paying any attention whatsoever.

She's clearly doing what she wants to do.

She's not doing this to deliberately annoy people, or to make her

life harder, she's doing it cos this is what she wants to do.

It's just, what she wants to do is

a much more difficult thing to convey to people.

It's not popular music in the traditional sense.

It's not going to hit the top ten and be on daytime Radio 1.

But lots of music isn't - there's only ten songs in a top ten!

Because she's chosen to do it her own way, DIY,

and independently, and without major backers,

then it's hard to get the breaks.

And that's the reality for so many unsigned artists

and for so many emerging artists.

If you set up your own label, do your own publishing,

got a bit of management, it can still be really hard.

There is an audience for this.

There's a lot of people, like myself, that love music like this.

# Last night was the end of radio

# The DJ said to think of all of the songs you used to know

# And keep them safely in your head

# Till you can sing them with someone who knows them... #

Friday March the 7th, and the big day has arrived -

it's the Cardiff gig.

I've got quite a lot of my family and friends coming along tonight.

I'm so excited, I can't tell you.

Obviously I've seen, on Facebook,

all the different clips from the London gig,

so I just cant wait.

We've got some hecklers.

I've told them, "It's being filmed, it's a serious show,

"please, don't heckle me." But we'll see.

-No! No.

-She's warned me. She has warned me.

We've had our warnings.

We got a gagging order.

I just can't believe it's all worked, you know?

All of these abstract ideas...

that started of with, "I wonder if I could have a light-up skirt that

"looked like a jellyfish that grew tentacles for this particular song,

"and there would just be a lot of connectivity about it?"

Yeah, I can't believe that people get it, and it's sort of...

it evokes the feelings that I thought it might, you know?

Cos with a lot of these things you just don't know how on earth

it's going to work.

After working around the clock, Rowley's metal skirt

is forged and centre stage.

I made it to the gig - I'm here.

I've managed it.

I've succumbed to all my other commitments to be here for

Charlotte and to see it all happen and see if the skirt

actually stays together, doesn't fall apart and...

see how it looks.

Set designer Jo and Charlotte's nanny Leanne frantically add

the finishing touches.

I was lucky to get

three-and-a-half-hours sleep last night, to be honest.

Costume designer Zoe ropes the band into covering the light tentacles.

Charlotte's scientific odyssey is about to hit Cardiff.

-MAN:

-Good to go!

THEY SING

Sh! Sh!

MUFFLED CHEERING

CHEERING

Hey, Cardiff.

How you doing?

MUSIC: "Glitterbombed" by Charlotte Church

# It caught my eye

# So I brushed my arm

# Just a speck of silver light

# Trapped on the peak of my fingertip

# Just a speck of silver light

# Just a mote to know you by... #

This show has been such a massive labour of love,

with lots of crazy differing emotions going on,

so I hope that all of that comes across,

that it's really full of love and it's really real.

I think she's had to learn about what she wants to achieve,

and as an audience and as a crowd going with her on that journey,

there's certainly been some brilliant moments.

# I've got glitter in my wounds

# Since I was glitterbombed by you

# Since I was glitterbombed by you

# Now I sparkle when I move

# Since I was glitterbombed by you

# Since I was glitterbombed by you

# What once was yours... #

You can tell that her and the band have really clicked musically

and the jamming sessions and all those practices that they've had,

obviously something really special happened,

because it sounds like a proper band.

She sounds like a front woman on a mission.

Erm... And I think it's really interesting

and really exciting to listen to as well.

MUSIC: "I Can Dream" by Charlotte Church

# Oh, I will deliver when I sleep

# I deliver you and wake

# Oh, with a shiver when I sleep

# I will shake myself to face the day

# Oh, I will deliver when I sleep

# I make promises... #

She's kind of creating her own little world it seems,

at the moment.

She's kind of trailblazing her own path, her own musical destiny.

And all power to her.

MUSIC: "How Not To Be Surprised When You're A Ghost" by Charlotte Church

# Nothing will be as it seems

# Those rivers houses and trees

# Are not the same ones that you knew

# But they still tug at your heart

# The memory of your heart

# You mustn't let it get you down

# You mustn't let it get you down

# You mustn't let it get you down

# Just think what you could get done

# There's no timing

# You can put to bed, ever way... #

She's really talented, you know.

Like, she can sing, she could belt out an opera, she could sing you

a pop song and she can sing all this experimental stuff.

That's enough for most people.

She presents on TV, she does some acting,

she can stand up in court and speak on behalf of the nation.

She just doesn't seem to stop.

# See the way she hides behind her hair

# If you love her you should set it right

# If you ever said life isn't fair

# This could be your chance to get it right... #

I don't have any regrets...in life.

Because...

it's a waste of time.

Such a waste of time and energy.

Like, learn from stuff, but to dwell on stuff in the past that you

wish you could have done differently, when there's no way to do that,

then there's no point in spending energy.

You know, the present is difficult enough and is enough to get through,

so...no regrets.

# Love

# Love

# Love

# Love

# Love

Love, love, love... #

I still feel like I'm sort of on a musical journey, which is

really cheesy, but I can't think of any other way to say it.

It's exploratory,

and I'm still sort of finding exactly

what it is that's I want to do.

CHEERING

Thank you very much.

But I haven't finished yet.