Ffeithiau Amgen It's My Shout


Ffeithiau Amgen

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-'Every time a friend succeeds,

-I die a little' - Gore Vidal

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-Down with her! Down with her!

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-Down with her! Down with her!

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-Down with her!

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-SOBBING

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-Siwan!

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-Siwan!

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-Presidential Hustings

-Today @ 3.00pm

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-FEEDBACK

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-One, two. One, two.

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-Can you hear me?

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-Can I have your attention?

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-Settle down.

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-Please, Wyn.

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-First, I want to draw your attention

-to one fact.

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-This is our first presidential

-election between two sisters.

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-CHEERING

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-Yes, indeed.

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-The daughters of the late

-Dr Rowland Morgan...

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-..the founder of this club.

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-Over here, you all know her...

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-..we have Siwan,

-our current president.

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-Over there,

-we have her sister, Gwawr.

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-Woo!

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-We want a fair fight

-which sticks to the facts.

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-No, we want a bitch fest!

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-You can go first, Siwan.

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-Thank you, Rhydian.

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-First, I want

-to talk about experience.

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-CHEERING

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-Thank you.

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-Yes, experience is a dull word

-but let me be honest.

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-One of your candidates, me...

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-..has had success

-at the Eisteddfod...

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-..on the athletics field and

-at the youth parliament for Wales.

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-Oh, be quiet.

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-The other wastes her time

-playing World of Warcraft...

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-..and writing blogs

-about an alien sex fiend!

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-CROWD GIGGLES

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-I know that she's my sister

-but like...

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-..really?

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-You've heard Siwan talking about her

-specialist subject which is Siwan...

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-..but the great man across the water

-said that it's time for change.

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-Go on, Gwawr!

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-Thank you, Sion.

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-This independent questionnaire...

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-..shows the satisfaction

-of the members has fallen by 50%.

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-You're talking ****!

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-You'll have your chance to respond,

-Siwan.

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-I've seen Gwawr's questionnaire.

-She wrote it herself.

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-Let's have some questions

-from the audience.

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-The first is from... Wyn.

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-Sorry.

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-Ta.

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-So, Siwan, after her Dad died...

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-Boo hoo, very sad.

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-She held some sessions here

-called Listen To Your Body.

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-My body told me

-to eat pizzas all day.

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-I've lost my six pack now...

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-..so can I have compensation,

-please?

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-A misunderstanding.

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-See me later and I'll sort you out.

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-See me later and I'll sort you out.

-

-That's what I heard.

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-Siwan misunderstands a lot like

-the short story award she stole.

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-He we go again,

-spiting me for my award.

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-You stole that award with my idea.

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-You stole that award with my idea.

-

-The story of a girl who lied.

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-Irony, folks!

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-The truth would hurt

-that girl's loved ones.

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-Whatever!

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-Dad knew that you couldn't stand

-that I do things better than you.

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-Dad isn't here

-to answer for himself.

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-Siwan! Siwan!

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-Siwan!

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-A good question, Hywel.

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-How would you promote

-the village of Bryntywyll?

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-Siwan?

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-Once again, experience.

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-In the youth parliament, I always

-say that the village is fab...

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-..that everyone is so nice...

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-..and that we make the

-best treacle toffee on Anglesey!

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-Thank you, Siwan.

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-Gwawr.

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-Bryntywyll is a dump.

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-A village full of thick Joskins...

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-..who fancy their sisters

-and the sisters boast about it.

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-I don't think

-you understood the question.

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-I didn't say those things.

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-Madfall Goch said it on her blog.

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-Um, OK but how is that relevant?

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-Ask Siwan.

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-Has anyone noticed her broach?

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-It's a red lizard.

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-EVERYONE GASPS

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-It was a gift from Dad.

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-Pretty, isn't it?

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-Stop it, Gwawr.

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-I didn't say those things.

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-Is that a fact

-or an alternative fact?

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-What?

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-You can't believe that.

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-Siwan!

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-Siwan!

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-Siwan?

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-"The gothics are like two skid marks

-tarnishing the area.

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-"They need to grow up!

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-"Rhydian, the perv',

-is as useful as a fart in a bottle."

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-Stop it, Gwawr. This is mental.

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-"When will Wyn, Nice-But-Dim,

-realize that I wouldn't touch him...

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-"..even if he was

-the last creature on this planet?"

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-Hold me back.

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-"Why does Catrin follow me

-around like a terrible stalker?

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-"She's totally mental!"

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-Down with her!

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-Down with her!

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-Down with her!

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-No, no.

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-I didn't do it.

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-Down with her!

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-I didn't do it.

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-Down with her!

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-Down with her!

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-No, no!

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-I didn't do anything.

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-It wasn't me.

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-SOUND DECELERATES

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-Down with her!

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-SOUND RESUMES

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-Down with her! Down with her!

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-Down with her!

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-Down with her!

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-Down with her! Down with her!

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-Why? Why?

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-Why?

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-I'm sorry.

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-OK?

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-It went too far.

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-I've got to live in this forest now.

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-I've got to live in this forest now.

-

-Don't be stupid!

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-What do you want, Gwawr?

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-I want to be the president.

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-No, you don't.

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-I want people to notice me.

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-I want people to notice

-me...

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-..not as the weird little sister

-of the fabulous, epic Siwan!

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-You're punishing me because

-Dad loved me more than he loved you.

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-Do you know what I did...

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-..on the night he died?

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-I prayed for the first time

-in my life.

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-Were you grateful

-that he was out of pain?

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-No, I was grateful

-that your pain was just beginning.

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-Sorry, I didn't mean that.

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-They destroyed Dad's photograph.

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-We can fix this.

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-How? I'm Public Enemy Number One

-thanks to you!

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-We just need a party.

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-What?

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-Someone to take the blame

-for the blog.

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-A yokel who hates you.

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-There's a village full of them now.

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-Wyn Lewis.

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-If Dad was here now, do you think

-he'd believe we had the same blood?

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-Yes.

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-He'd see that we're very much alike.

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-.

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