Wetherby 17 Bargain Hunt

Between 1455 and 1485,

the Wars of the Roses, between the rival

houses of Lancaster and York,

were waged all across Yorkshire.

Well, today from 12.15pm to 1pm,

the Blues and the Reds

will fight it out for golden gavel glory.

So, let's go bargain hunting, yeah!

"A horse, a horse,

"my kingdom for a horse."

Wetherby Racecourse

is the scene of our battle in the war of the fleeces today

and, crikey Moses, this could get tense, let's check it out.

The Red team are breaking up.

-Ha.

-It's gone!

-THEY ALL LAUGH

Phil!

The Blues are cracking up.

I think Chris likes it because he's a bit nuts, so...

THEY ALL LAUGH

And Phil finally throws in the towel at auction.

-I'll pack this up. I don't want to do this any more.

-We'll take your job.

Don't. But first, let's meet the teams.

Well, well, you have to laugh or you might burst into tears.

On today's show, we've got two teams of friends.

Well, they're friends at the moment.

We've got Helen and Jude for the Reds

and for the Blues, we've got Chris and Dale.

-Hello, everyone.

-ALL: Hello.

Hello, hello. Now, Helen, how did you two girls meet?

We met about 17 years ago when our children were tiny

and with her I joined a toddler group that we ended up running

because nobody else wanted to.

And then since then we've been through thick and thin, our daughters

have grown up together...

We've sort of not grown up together.

Oh, right. In other words, you're just as child-like

as you were all those years ago?

-BOTH: Absolutely.

-Which is marvellous.

Now, it says here you're a bit of a gambler, Hels Bells?

Well, I'm not exactly a maverick.

Oh.

But I did go to Las Vegas and won 250 on a 25 cent stake.

So, what's the tip for doing that, then?

-Uh, not knowing what you're doing.

-OK.

-And, um...

-Beginner's luck?

-Beginner's luck.

Apart from that, you like to do a bit of bingo.

-Yeah, we occasionally go to the bingo.

-We do.

-It's often gin-induced.

-Is it?

-Yes.

-Gin and bingo.

-Yes.

-Yeah, it's a good mix.

-But we don't tend to win very much.

-No.

Jude would know because you're a finance director, darling.

-Yes.

-And you're used to handling other people's money.

-I am, yes.

-So, if your gambling friend is going out gambling,

are you going to be the responsible one today?

Absolutely not, no, I'm off duty so Helen is team leader

and she's having the money, it could be a risky business.

-She doles out the gin. Anything could happen.

-Anything could happen.

So where do you financially direct?

Well, I work for the GORSE Academies Trust,

which looks after four schools at the moment.

They're based in Leeds

and I look after all the support services for those schools.

And what sort of thing will you be looking out for to buy, Jude?

Um, I think just anything that we like, really,

we know nothing about antiques, in fairness.

Oh, you'll do frightfully well, then(!)

-We'll be, we'll be reliant on our expert.

-Yes.

But we'll buy something that we like in the hope that other people

will like it and it'll make us a bit of money.

And are you pretty keen on beating these boys?

Oh, absolutely, and we've got the red Liverpool jackets on

-and clearly they are Evertonians.

-The Everton supporters.

Oh, gosh, it's about to get tribal.

Well done, girls.

-Now, Chris, it says here that you are a barrel of laughs, right.

-OK.

I take it that's a tedious link to me working in a keg plant,

-but I am, I suppose.

-You work in a brewery.

-Yeah, well, packaging.

-And what do you do?

I work in the keg plant as an engineer.

-Oh, do you?

-That's how me and Dale met, we're engineers.

The big thing is that you get special treats,

-don't you, occasionally?

-Sort of, you get £250 worth for a year...

-£250 worth of drink?

-Yeah.

-That's very nice, isn't it?

-It is nice, yeah.

-Um...

-It helps.

Dale, is it the same for you?

Yeah, I work for a different company,

I work for a Dutch beer company but it's a case a month for me.

-Is it?

-So I'm quite popular at parties.

THEY ALL LAUGH

Now, listen, Chris,

when you're not working, you like to bung a backpack on.

Yeah, I've been travelling, I've been travelling

since I was like 22 now, I've been all over the world.

A few years ago, I got a round-the-world ticket, actually.

I went to Southeast Asia, Australia, Fiji.

Poor old you(!)

It was a lot of fun.

Last year, I went to Africa as well and I climbed Kilimanjaro.

-Yeah? Did you, really?

-Yeah, it was good.

Now, Dale, it says here that you have grown from a football

-fan into a football coach?

-Yeah, that's right.

One of my passions used to be Bolton Wanderers, but their fortunes

turned that a little bit. And my young son growing up,

so I took over his football team.

-I've done that for probably six or seven years now.

-Yeah?

We've just had a really successful season of winning

the Bolton and Bury B division.

-Have you really?

-Yes.

All thanks to the quality coaching.

Um, or the very good players that I get to...

And your modesty too.

-But that is very satisfying, isn't it?

-It is to me, yeah.

Yeah, no, brilliant.

So what's your plan of attack, you two, today?

Um, I think being engineers, we're going to look,

try and look for some antique techie stuff.

-Really?

-Possibly, yeah.

Are you going to agree with what you buy though?

If we have any disagreements, I'll just tell Chris what he's doing.

I understand.

Now we have the pecking order sorted out, it's the money moment.

-£300 apiece, there we go, £300.

-Thanks very much.

-There you go, Hels Bells. There you go, Chris.

-Thank you.

You know the rules, your experts await and off you go

and very, very, very good luck.

I always wanted to work in a brewery.

Our terrific teams of friends need some matey mentors.

Stepping up for the Reds, it's Anita Manning.

Careful.

But coming to the aid of the Blues is Philip Serrell.

TIM SCOFFS

Well, you know, guys, there's nothing I like better than having

two lovely, big handsome guys on my arms.

-Are you looking forward to this?

-We are very excited.

-Is there a plan?

Uh, not really, no!

-Right, so there's no plan.

-No plan.

What do you like? What will your tactics be?

We'll just buy what we like.

-Maybe something a bit technical with us both being engineers.

-Yeah.

OK, teams, your time starts now.

WHISTLE BLOWS

Well, let's get along and see what we can find.

We're going to have a great time.

-BOTH: Yeah, definitely.

-Let's go.

To plan or not to plan, that is the question.

Well, the boys aren't hanging about.

What we're really looking for with microscopes

is we like to see them in the box.

-Right.

-Yeah.

And with a maker's name.

I don't think somebody would buy that

-if it's not full kit in the box.

-True.

There might be better items out there.

Crikey, these boys are focused.

The Reds, however...

I think we'll just see it if we like it if we see it.

-You'll see it if you like it, you'll like it if you see it?

-That's it.

-Yeah.

Right, you got that? Great.

Try and find something a bit different.

-Well, I want to know what that thing is.

-What 'what thing' is?

This.

What do you think it is?

A television aerial.

BUZZER BLARES

Unlucky, Hels Bells.

It's either a wool winder or for drying fishing lines on.

-BELL CHIMES

-Oh, didn't he do well?

So who would be attracted to something like this?

-Well, clearly...

-Us!

-..your mate, yeah.

I'm thinking of resale value.

Really? Let's hope there's more people like you in the auction room.

-Is there a chance of that?

-No.

-Doubtful.

-Highly unlikely.

You'd be hung out to dry and left in a spin with that one, girls.

Back with the Blues and another first potential purchase.

Give us the lowdown then, Anita.

What do you think of the fireplace?

Well, boys, it's a Victorian cast-iron fireplace.

At the inset, it would have been surrounded by tiles here

and it would have looked very nice

and would have perhaps had a marble or a wooden surround.

In Glasgow, where I have my auction,

-we have a lot of Victorian flats, sandstone flats.

-Yeah.

And people are now putting these things back

-where they had been taken out in the '70s.

-Uh-huh.

If you are someone who has a Victorian house

and you are looking for that type of thing,

then this is perfect.

But if you're buying to make a profit at auction,

it might not be the best thing.

-It depends on the price of it.

-Yeah.

Because it is just a bit of something.

We're looking around about £100 for this.

What do you think, auction price?

If you like it, if you've got faith in it,

you can go for it,

but you have got to remember that it is a bit of something.

What's the best that can be done on it?

£100.

100 is the best?

You've got 300 quid

so you've got plenty of money, boys.

-Go for it.

-Yeah, I want to.

-Go on, then. Gamble.

-Let's get it.

Well, I think, you boys, you seem to be very definite on that.

Yeah, let's do it. £100, yeah.

You Blues are getting on like a house on fire, one item down.

-Yes, OK, so that's your first item done.

-Yeah, done.

-Well done, boys.

Let's go.

Meanwhile, the Reds still have the £300 burning a hole in their pocket.

Any suggestions, Phil?

It's a table lighter but it'll be out of our price range, I think.

-Pencils.

-Yeah, very nice.

-Yeah, I like them.

They're not going to make anything like that sort of money at auction.

-85.

-I think that's probably a bit strong for us.

-Right.

-Um.

-Bear it in mind.

-Yeah.

-Cos if you like it, that's the trick, isn't it?

-BOTH: Yes, OK.

-Thank you very much.

-Thank you.

Ooh, sorry.

Gently, gently, Jude.

Phil, it's time you had a word. Regroup, Reds.

-The thing is you've spent...we've spent 17 minutes.

-Yeah.

-And time is money in this business.

-BOTH: Yes.

-So, you know, we need to buy something.

-We do.

Sound advice, Phil.

Come on, team, get cracking.

-What do you think about that, Chris?

-I really like it.

-It's a...

-It's an old nutcracker.

-Patent.

-Patent Crakanut.

-Made in England.

-What have you got there, boys?

-I really like it, it's quite quirky.

It's a nutcracker.

You crack the nuts and the nuts go in and the shells stay in there.

-Oh, right, yeah.

-It's got a patent on the bottom.

That's appealing to your, er, engineering brain, isn't it?

And it has been a sort of patented thing, if you look on the back.

-It's a Crakanut.

-Yeah.

-Crakanut.

It's probably a wee bit of very good industrial design.

I think Chris likes it because he's a bit nuts, so...

THEY ALL LAUGH

Right, come on, girls, get a move on, you haven't bought anything yet.

Spot anything you like, Hels?

-What about the curling stone?

-What about the curling stone?

-I like the curling stone.

-Yes, I like that.

-From the Olympics.

-You see...

-I've always fancied a little go at it.

-Now, this is really interesting, are you ready for this?

-Yeah.

Fingers on buzzers, here we go again.

CLOCK TICKS

What's this made of?

-Marble.

-BUZZER BLARES

-Granite.

-Granite.

From?

-I do know this.

-OK.

Yes, yes.

Wales.

-BUZZER BLARES

-No. Scotland.

Oh, Hels Bells.

This comes from Ailsa Craig

and that's where curling stones are made,

-they're made from stone from there, and I think that's absolutely lovely.

-I do.

-I do.

I think that's absolutely beautiful

and that's going to make around, at auction, I think £50 to £80.

-Right.

-So, he's got it priced at 145

but I think this is a really lovely thing, um...

What's the best you can do it for?

Best I could do would be £100.

-How old do you think that is?

-It's a Victorian one, I think.

-And people use these for doorstops, don't they?

-Yes.

-Yeah.

-Yes.

Now, how much do you both really like this?

-I like it a lot.

-I like it very, very much.

OK, right, here's the deal.

-You've now had 20 minutes.

-BOTH: Yeah.

-You haven't bought anything.

-BOTH: No.

And you've got a £100 curling stone

that I think might cost you money,

but our watchword when we set out

was to buy things that you both liked, wasn't it?

-BOTH: Yeah.

-Do you both like it?

-Yeah.

Will you do it for 90?

No, I'm sorry, 100 is the best on it.

It's like getting blood out of a stone, hey, Jude?

Are you going to go for it?

BOTH: Yes. We'll gamble on it.

I shall leave you in this good gentleman's safe hands.

DEALER: Thank you.

-We'll take it, thank you very much.

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

Well, stone the crows, hey?

Item number one done and dusted for the Reds.

Another nutcracker there, Chris,

it's got Wainberg, Israel, written on that.

We should ask Anita about this. How old would you say that is?

Five minutes old.

THEY LAUGH

-No, it looks like a kind of souvenir-thing...

-Right.

..from the 1970s.

You know, with this kind of abstracted design

and I must say it has a little 'je ne sais quois'.

Yeah.

I don't know, I mean I think it...

-No.

-I don't...

But I shouldn't be...I shouldn't be saying no.

-If you like that...

-I like that nutcracker, you know.

..and you like that one...

and we bought the two of them together,

we would have a pair of nuts buying a pair of nutcrackers.

Oh, Lordy, Anita.

And another wee nut encouraging you.

£5 each or you can have the two for eight quid.

Would you take five for the two?

I'll do them for six, three quid each.

-What do you think?

-What do you think? We've got to do it for £6.

-We'll definitely make a profit.

-Definitely.

-Unless it doesn't sell.

-No, we'll make money on £6, definitely.

-I'll go with that.

Yeah, me too.

-OK, there you are, you've got a deal.

-We've got a deal.

-There you are, good boy.

-Thank you.

Well done, boys, that's two for you and one for the girls.

Time to redress the balance, hey, Jude?

-Oh, look at these.

-I do like those scales, yeah.

I think they're really cute.

So these aren't as old as they look, are they?

-And you know that by the fact that they weigh grams, not ounces.

-Ah.

-Oh.

-Is that an older one?

-MALE DEALER: It is, yes.

-How much are they?

-FEMALE DEALER:

-35.

Yeah, I like those as well actually.

-I'd much...

-But they're still in grams. No, they're in ounces, I prefer it in ounces.

Yeah, it's a step in the right direction, isn't it?

Here's a question for you, Jude.

Which is older?

Sorry, but I bet I'm right.

It's that beautiful patina of yours, Phil.

And I think these are going to make between £20 to £40 at auction.

-We need to try and find out how much you can get them for.

-Yeah.

-Do you want to...

-What's your lowest price?

-FEMALE DEALER:

-20 quid.

-20 quid.

No, nothing, we don't want to pay anything.

We don't want to pay anything, obviously, but...

-MALE DEALER:

-The most would be 25.

-25?

-Do you like them?

-Yeah, OK.

-Yeah, done?

-Do you think we should settle for 25?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-OK.

-We'll weigh in with those then, shall we?

-We will.

Every punt going on this programme.

Hey, leave the punts to me, Phil.

Thank you very much, my love. Thank you very, very much.

-DEALER:

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

Jakey shakey and I think it's time to wakey-wakey, team,

the clock is ticking!

Ladies, we need to come up with a plan, because we've got

two items, I'm really pleased with them both, you?

BOTH: Yeah, very.

We've spent £125, we've got 175 left

and we need to find something, any ideas?

No idea at all but we need to be quick.

We do need to be quick, something trivial.

Something trivial, right,

-let's go in pursuit of something trivial, shall we?

-Absolutely.

Uh-huh.

Very good, Phil, and just like Trivial Pursuit,

you've got an awful lot of wedge left.

Now, then, last time I was in Wetherby

I stumbled across an interesting find.

Did you ever have a penknife when you were a nipper?

Well, if you had a penknife, it simply folded up

and went safely in your pocket.

If you were grown-up though, you'd have had a sheath knife.

With a sheath into which you'd safely place the blade.

Well, that's what this thing is.

But it isn't some childhood or boyish toy.

This came from a skilled, native craftsman.

We've got two sections of bone here, which are on the curve,

and it's got two metal rivets down one end and they're positioned

in a way so that they articulate, allowing the bones to come apart.

And that's so that the blade fits into the sheath

and when you close the bones together,

the knife is gripped within the sheath.

And just to make quite sure, the native that made this

has carved the top bone

with a little protuberant element here, see?

That's because he has a thong of leather

which he binds around the thing in a figure of eight shape.

So that no way he loses his knife.

What else has he done?

Well, he's returned to his igloo or his shack

and he's decorated the sheath.

And surprise, surprise, the design incorporates his prey,

the caribou or reindeer.

This is a man who, probably, when this was made a 150 years ago,

couldn't read or write, he was just an expert hunter.

That's what he could do.

Where's it come from?

Well, in an area that we like to describe as Lapland.

Today, the indigenous race of the Sami.

And this is where the sheath comes from

and the fact that it's got this naive decoration

is incredibly appealing to collectors.

What would it cost you?

Well, this thing is priced at a couple of hundred pounds.

So it's not cheap,

it's not the thing that you'd buy necessarily today

to make a big profit, but to make that connection with an early people

and a simpler way of life is, in a way, charming.

True, true, but back to our own hunt today

and the Blues are still surveying the fair.

I'm not sure if you would be interested...

-What about that, Chris?

-All right, OK.

-I do actually really like this.

-Yeah, it's a...

Now this is a surveyor's instrument, boys.

Now we can see the top, we have this, it's like a spirit level.

I love the stand, it's like made out of one piece of wood.

It's like a really old theatre light type.

Yeah, well, I mean, you're both interested

in instruments, as engineers.

Now, let's, let's have a look at the box here.

Bring it up.

Well, I mean, this is a mahogany box and we have...

-Repaired and adjusted.

-And that was in 1932.

It was in for repair in Manchester. It's got a wee history there.

Now, if you can imagine the late 19th century,

where there was great exploration.

So this is the type of thing that the surveyors would use to,

you know, for making tracks or making out passageways and so on.

-Did you know anything about the name on the side?

-What does it say?

Through... Throughthon, is it?

It looks like Troughton and Sons,

but we can get a better look at that.

It's dirty here.

But what I can say to you is - maker's name is good.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-So I think that's a nice item.

-BOTH: Yeah, I really like it.

-Have you fallen in love with it, boys?

-Straightaway.

-It's just brilliant.

-And you've got to have it?

-I think so.

-I'll go and have a chat to the dealer...

-Yeah

-..and see what sort of price we can get for it.

-OK.

-Brilliant.

-But you've fallen in love with it.

We definitely have.

-I really do like this though.

-Yeah, it's a great piece of...

If you can still see through it.

Shutter's down.

-THEY LAUGH

-Well done, boys.

You've stuck to your words, something technical

was on the hit list, hopefully Anita can FETCH a good price.

Right, then, a time check, please, Philip.

Now, we've got 20 minutes left, we're under the cosh here now.

What are we going to buy?

-Is there anything you like?

-Not really, no.

What about something, I don't know, what sort of thing, big and lumpy.

-Yeah, could be it.

-Big and lumpy?

-That sounds right.

Bit like you, Phil. Technical term, ha!

So, what's the news, Anita?

The asking price for the level was £165, remember.

-Boys, I've had a chat to the dealer.

-OK.

He wants 165 and he will not budge.

Really? What have we got left? 194?

-I think we should just go for it.

-Yeah.

-I like that.

-I'm not leaving without this.

-I really like that.

I think you've fallen in love with it and it's exactly what you want.

-Yeah.

-From when we first came down, it's the kind of item

we were going to look for.

Without knowing this is what we were looking for all the time.

-Ah! Good, good, good. OK, that's fine.

-OK.

-165?

-Yeah, brilliant.

-I'll go and pay then.

-Perfect, deal.

-Terrific.

Well done, boys. You stacked your plan with minutes in hand.

Now, girls, you still have that ELUSIVE last item to find.

Time is drawing to an end.

-SHE LAUGHS

-You really like that?

-I do.

-Why do you want a galvanised bath?

-You could have a party.

-You could put some plants in.

-I wouldn't get in,

-I'd not get out.

-SHE LAUGHS

-It's got holes in the bottom.

-SHE LAUGHS

-It's obviously been used as a plant pot, hasn't it?

-Yeah.

-I would have that in the garden for a plant.

-Would you?

-Yeah.

-You really do, don't you? Both of you do?

-Yeah.

You're all mad. Hold on a minute,

let me just go and see how much this, um, thing is.

-How about that?

-It's all the fives. 55.

-Shame it's not two little ducks.

-DUCK QUACKS

What do you want to spend, ladies?

Well, I can tell you that I think that's worth between 20 and 40 quid.

-DEALER:

-I'd sell it to you for 40 but I wouldn't go less than 40.

-OK.

So, what do you think?

-35?

-I'm thinking 35.

-Oh, come on.

-DEALER:

-38.

-And you both really like it that much?

-Yeah.

-It's cracking, isn't it?

-Yeah, it's great.

-Yeah, it is.

-Just cos you've got no taste.

-Yeah, exactly.

-TIM:

-Poor Phil, everyone's picking on you today. Don't cry.

THEY LAUGH

-He's gone!

-DEALER:

-In disgust.

-38 quid then it's now. DEALER:

-Done.

-TIM:

-So, an early bath for Phil and all three items for you lot.

Well done, girls.

So, clock-off, teams, because time's up.

Let's check out what the Red team bought, eh? Ker-ching.

First up was the curling stone. They paid a well-rounded £100.

Next up, their scales weighed in at £25.

And finally, they all had a laugh around the bath.

Apart from Phil.

And £38 was paid.

Girls, that was a thrill, wasn't it?

-Absolutely.

-It was great.

-Seriously good fun.

-Now, how much did you spend?

-£163.

-163, I'd like £137, please, of leftover lolly.

-OK.

Thank you very much. 137.

Now, Hels, what's your favourite piece?

-The curling stone, definitely.

-I love those, don't you?

-Absolutely.

-Do you agree with that?

-Yeah, definitely.

-Is it going to bring the biggest profit?

-No, probably not.

What is going to bring the most profit?

We think the tin bath. PHIL SNORTS

-The tin bath.

-Sorry.

-Is that the one with the rust

-in the bottom?

-Absolutely.

-That's the one.

-All right, lovely.

-And the holes.

-And the holes, OK, fine. Dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.

Just shows what a silly time we're having.

There you go, Phil, there's a nice wodge of cash there.

Meanwhile, why don't we check out what the Blue team bought, eh?

Their first item was the Victorian fireplace. They handed over £100.

Next, they went nuts over the crackers and shelled out £6.

And finally, after mapping out a plan, the boys walked away

with the surveyor's level for £165.

-OK, now, how much did you spend?

-We spent £271.

That is a magnificent amount of money.

I would like £29 of leftover lolly, please.

-Here you go, Tim.

-OK, thank you very much.

Now, which is your favourite piece, Chris?

My favourite one, I think will make the most profit,

is the nutcrackers but I like the telescope but...

-The alidade.

-The alidade, I can't even pronounce it.

OK, yeah, it's one of those things that keeps you on the level, right?

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-On the straight and narrow and on the level.

-Yeah.

-Not a huge amount of money, but...

-No, it's not.

The boys were very sort of boys-y, type of big rusty kind of things.

Yeah...lumps.

What were you expecting?

I'm going to get the biggest thing I possibly can for this money OR...

a small and delicate, feminine thing.

-To compliment our items.

-Like Chris.

We'll stand by our beds for that. Good luck, chaps,

good luck, Anita. Meanwhile, we're about to head off

to the auction. What a thrill is that!

Well, we've whizzed from Wetherby to Thomas Watson's saleroom,

in Darlington, to be with Peter Robinson. Peter, good morning.

Good morning, Tim, good to see you.

Very nice to see you too. We've got an eclectic mix,

starting off with this granite curling stone.

-Yes, yeah.

-Just the one. Hopefully there would be at least another

for a decent curling match?

I would say so, yeah, but if you're going to take it home,

-I think you only need one.

-You probably do.

It's got a lot of presence.

It would make an absolutely ace front doorstop, wouldn't it?

-Absolutely, yeah, I mean...

-Fantastic from that point of view.

So what's a single one like this worth?

Well, we've put an estimate of 30 to 50 on it.

It's a good example and that's what I'd expect it to make.

OK, well, they paid 100 and I'm with you, really.

I've seen them before too. On their own, not in a box,

-£50 a stone is probably enough.

-Yeah.

Next is the postage scales.

They look suspiciously over-polished to me.

Yeah, and I think it's partly because I don't think they're too old.

They just don't have that warm look, especially the weights,

which would be handled, of course. I'm not saying that they're new

but they're not Victorian, they're not from the 1920s,

they're a bit later.

It doesn't have a lot of charm to me but on the other hand, it was cheap.

-What's your estimate?

-30 to 40.

-OK, £25 paid, so, you know, that's what you call first class.

-Yeah.

Well, they used to call it first class.

-Anyway...

-Fingers crossed.

-..moving on,

we've got the galvanised tin bath which is definitely not first class.

HE SIGHS

-No.

-That's a dreadful thing, isn't it?

-Well, what do you do with it?

I mean, it's a garden item and, um, that's all you can do with it

and it's a big garden item, so...

It's not a modest garden item - it's a great thumping thing.

Well, are you going to drill holes in your galvanised tin bath

-because you're going to just...

-It's probably got holes already.

I mean, I don't get it, really,

but I certainly don't get it for £38.

-£38?!

-£38 they paid.

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-See him wince?

-What's your estimate?

-We've put an estimate of 15 to 30,

hoping to get some interest

for somebody that wants it for the garden.

Well, that is the only hope and in fact, what with that

and the overpaid apparent price on the curling stone,

they're going to need their bonus buy.

So let's go and have a look at it!

OK, Hels, Jude, you excited about this?

BOTH: Very, very.

What do you suppose the old rogue has brought you under this...

elongated... You can bet your bottom dollar it'll be heavy.

Anyway, £137 worth of leftover lolly you gave Philip.

He has gone out and with great precision

and care has crafted a bonus buy, especially for you, and it is...

-HELEN AND JUDE LAUGH

-What a surprise.

Horse-drawn single furrow plough.

This would have been used, I suppose, around 1900, 1910.

People buy these as decorative things, put them in their garden,

do whatever, and I think this is quite a cool object, cost me £100.

What do you think it's going to make?

I would hope it might make around £100, £110, £120,

something like that. That's the hope, really.

I think we'll need all the help we can get, don't you?

-Would you fancy it then, Hels, or what?

-I do like it very much.

I think we have to go for it just for Helen's mum, to be fair...

-Yeah

-..because she did say we'd buy farming equipment.

-Always buys a bit of old plough.

-What's going on here?

It's complicated enough without having to cater for your mums!

-OK, fine.

-I like it very much.

-You like it very much.

-I do, yes.

Well, the thing is, girls, it's best to do a little assessment

-when you get to the moment, OK?

-Yep.

Cos you'll have sold your first three items,

then there's a little pause and I'll say to you -

do you want to go with it or not?

Just control yourselves till that moment, if you possibly can.

Right now, for the audience at home,

let's find out what the auctioneer thinks about Phil's plough.

Well, you've seen it, I've seen it, they've seen it,

-how do you rate it?

-The plough?

-The plough.

Everybody should have one.

-We put an estimate of 40-60 on it.

-Oh, you brave man.

-Well, probably.

We've had them before, they do sell,

don't ask me why, but you drive up the dale

and you do sometimes see them in front gardens, painted.

Well, it's very much an agricultural area

and Philip Serrell is a wise old bird when it comes to this

and maybe it'll make its 100, maybe it won't.

-Yeah.

-OK.

Well, it's all part of life's rich pattern. That's it for the Reds.

Now, for the Blues. We've got a cast-iron fireplace

which is again at the other side of the saleroom

and that's painted and kind of tickled up to death, isn't it?

Well, it's black-painted with gilt, sort of, highlights.

It doesn't have a mantle shelf,

so it didn't inspire me when we unwrapped it.

I mean, it's a small fireplace as well,

-it's more of a bedroom fireplace.

-Exactly.

-What's your estimate on it, then?

-At £20 to £40 on this one.

Well, there you go. That is a big, dark, open hole, isn't it?

They paid £100, this is trouble.

In fact, you could say it's completely nuts.

Now, moving on to nuts,

we got two nut-cracking devices here, right?

-We have.

-One of which comes from Israel.

-The brass one.

-That's the fancy one.

The other one is British

-and presumably dates from the '30s.

-Yeah, it looks like it.

It has got a patent mark on the base of it, it's chrome and wood.

-Looks Deco-ish, doesn't it?

-It does look Deco-ish, definitely.

So, you got two nut-cracking devices. What's your estimate?

We've put £20 to £30 on them.

I don't know who's going to buy them.

There's two of them, which helps.

Of course it does.

You know, one's very ornamental, the Israeli one,

-and the other one is very practical.

-OK, £6 paid.

-Well, for £6, yeah, yeah.

-£3 each.

But, you've got to have a buyer on the day.

-And...

-Well, that's what we're looking at for you to do.

Absolutely. I was just about to say that. That's my problem.

Thanks for levelling with me there, Peter,

because we're going to move on now to the surveyor's level.

The surveyor's level.

So, how do you see a surveyor's level like that

going in the auction?

Um, well, it's got its box, it's got its tripod,

so it's a fairly complete collectable.

It could be tidier but we've put an estimate of £50 to £100 on it.

£50 to £100, hey? Nothing like enough, I tell you.

They paid £165 for that lot, which is pretty well top weight.

Anyway, thanks so much for levelling with me there

and, on the face of it,

it looks as if they're going to do very, very badly,

in which case, they're definitely going to need their bonus buy,

so let's go and have a look at it.

-Well, guys, happy?

-Yeah.

Yeah, this is the leftover lolly moment.

-Do you remember you gave Anita £29?

-Not much at all.

-Not much at all because you spent up so well.

-We have faith in her.

Don't we all have faith in her(?)

OK, let's see whether the faith is misplaced or not.

Anita, show us what you bought.

Look at that!

I bought you boys a little bit of 'ooh-la-la'.

It's a little French, Art Nouveau trinket box.

It's like a copperised metal, you know,

there's a copper and brass finish to it,

but it's probably a base metal.

But it's rather beautifully decorated

with this lovely, sinuous, Art Nouveau shape.

So, have a wee look at it and tell me if you like it.

What would they store in it? Is it a jewellery box or...?

Yes, all your little precious things.

Do boys have little precious things?

-They certainly do!

-Little precious things.

-Yeah.

-So, how much did you pay for that?

-I paid £12 for it.

-How much?! Is that all?

-Yes.

-Has it had a leg knocked off? No?

-Not at all.

Is it all in good condition?

The inside looks a bit torn and worn, but...

Well, I was quite pleased to see that,

because it shows that it is period.

It's still got a sewing needle in there.

-Yeah, that's thrown in for nothing.

-Oh, really?

The needle in the haystack.

How much do you think that will bring at auction?

Well, I would estimate it... It's not a thing of great quality,

it's just got a little bit of style, French style.

Um, I think it could go to 25.

-Really?

-20 to 30 is maybe a nice limit that I would put on it.

Perfect! Well, you can think about that, boys.

Seems to me it's a bit of a no-brainer,

but nevertheless, your moment will arrive,

because right now, why don't we find out

what the auctioneer thinks about Anita's little box.

-Bit of Art Nouveau.

-A little bit of Art Nouveau, indeed, yeah.

A little ring box, jewellery box.

Gilt on white metal and quite nicely decorated. A nice little piece.

A little bit worn inside but just showing its age, you know.

-Early 20th century.

-Perfect.

The sort of thing you went to Paris and fell in love

and bought 'er indoors a bit of a gift

-and that's what you brought the gift back in.

-I would say so, yeah.

Not souvenir ware, but almost that.

Well, it's got a practical use.

-Put on the dressing table to keep knick-knacks in.

-Yes.

-We've estimated it at £15 to £25.

-Very nice.

Well, Anita will be delighted, she only paid the £12.

So, you know, this is a win-win situation, all-round.

But there are some problems, as we've seen...

-Yes, indeed.

-..and anything might happen.

-Anyway, this is exciting, Peter!

-Indeed.

-We will rely on you.

-I'll do my best.

I'm sure you will. Thank you very much.

Well, Peter, I hope you're poised in position,

cos it's time to take to your rostrum.

OK, H and J, we're very, very close to the auction here.

-How excited are you?

-BOTH: Very!

-Are you?

-Yeah, very.

Now, what about this curling stone lark, then?

-He's put £30 to £50 on it, you spent £100.

-Yeah, we did.

-Now, that's a big, dark hole...

-Whoops.

-..to start your game off, isn't it, really?

I'm sorry, but that's his opinion. He could be wrong.

There are lots of people in the room.

-Let's hope that they all like to have a good curl here.

-Yeah.

-We really like it.

-Yeah.

It's enough to make my toes curl, I can tell you that.

Lot number 204. The Ailsa Craig granite curling stone.

Opening 45. £45 we're opening at.

50 now. 50 on the net. At £50.

5, I have here. 55. At £55.

60 now, I'm bid, at £60 in the room.

At £60. 65 on the net.

At 65, I'm bid. £70. 75. £80.

With me still on the book at £80 for the lot. 85. 85.

-Keep going.

-'£90.'

-Yes.

95. £100. £100.

The bid's with me still at...

Girls, you are great. Isn't that great?

Selling now at £100.

-£100 and it's wiped...

-Whoo!

-Whoo!

Whoo! Whoo! ..wiped its face.

-£100, that's brilliant.

-Tremendous!

Well, you've seen them all off, girls. Well done.

Now, the postal scale.

£20. A low start here at £20.

25, I have. 30. 35.

40. 45. 50. 55.

The lady's bid now. At £55.

Standing in the room at £55. 60 anywhere?

Doubled your cash!

Being sold to the lady standing in the room at £55.

£55. You have just made £30 on that, which is super.

Now, the tin bath.

-Look out, girls.

-Go on!

As you can see, a very delightful, very attractive lot.

At £20 I have to start. At £20.

£25...

BOTH: Come on!

25, I have. 30. 35.

40. 45. 50. 55?

£50 and I'm bid for this lot. At £50.

Absolutely ludicrous.

£50. No water included.

-Whoo!

-Yes!

-£50. Shows what I know.

Anyway, plus £12 on that.

You are plus £42, all right?

There is some madness here in Darlington.

Now, listen, you don't have to go with anything now.

You've got £42, you've got a lump of money. Could be a winning score.

What are you going to do about the bonus buy?

-Free to go for it.

-We're going to go for it.

-No!

-So, it's all down to you now.

-Yeah, Philip, come on.

Come on, Philip, you're going to let the side down.

-Are you going to go with it?

-Yes, we're going to go for it.

Are you going to go with it? Are you sure about this? Girls? Quickly.

BOTH: Yeah.

-You're going with the bonus buy.

-We are.

He'll have to give us the £42 out of his own pocket.

OK, we're going with the bonus buy.

We have £25 to start on this lot.

£25. At £25. 30. 5.

40. 5. 50. 5. 60.

60 with the gentleman. 65, madam?

65. 70, sir. 75, madam? £70.

Gentleman's bid I'm taking at £70, right in the doorway.

At 75 upstairs. £80, sir. £80. £85.

There's a chorus of hands.

£90. 95, thank you. 100 make it?

I don't believe it.

PHILIP: They're all mad here.

Gentleman upstairs, in the balcony at 90.

-100, thank you.

-Whoo!

-Yes!

We've done something right. 110.

-I take it all back, Philip.

-Bids upstairs at £110.

The gentleman's going to... 120. 130, sir?

Look at this!

140. 150, sir? 160? 150.

Gentleman's bid in the balcony at £150.

The hammer's going down at £150.

-£150.

-Tremendous!

Well, hail the great expert, that's all I can say.

-Plus 50.

-Well done your mum!

Yes! Well done your mum!

Well done her mum. OK, plus £50 for that.

You had £42 before, which is plus 92 then.

Well, that's falling money then, isn't it?

-I can't believe we've done that!

-That is amazing.

-Brilliant.

I'm going to pack this up.

-I don't want to do this any more.

-We'll take your job.

You keep at it. You're getting better and better at this.

OK. OK, girls. That's fantastic, isn't it? Plus £92.

-Don't say a word to the Blues.

-No, we won't.

-In fact, don't talk to anybody.

-No.

-OK, lovely. Thank you very much.

-Thanks very much!

-OK, C and D, you good?

-Yeah.

-Very good.

You've got that bedroom fireplace. Spent £100 on that.

He's put £20 to £40 on it.

On the other hand, funny things happen at auction

and the most unlikely objects - ha-ha-ha -

do bring a considerable amount of money,

so you could be in the money with the cast iron here,

I just don't know.

Very low start to start it off. £15 to start.

At £15, a Victorian fireplace.

At £15. 20 for it. 20 on the net.

At £20. 25, can I say now?

£25 at the back. 30, internet now.

30 I'm bid. 35? £30. At £30.

Going to be sold at £30.

Are we all finished?

£30! That's terrible.

£30 is minus £70.

-Minus 70, that's a good start(!)

-Sorry about that.

Now, international interest please in nutcrackers.

At £10. 15, can I say for them?

At £10. Only 15. Surely somewhere for the two lots.

15, thank you, madam, at the back, in the doorway.

Well, you've doubled your money.

£15 only, all down.

£15 is plus nine, which means your loses are minus 61. Now...

BOTH: Not bad(!)

Don't level with me!

£50 to start. At £50. At £50.

55, can I say? At £55. 60 now.

£60. 65. 70 on my right now.

-Ooh, 70.

-New bidder at £70.

Gentleman standing at my right at £70.

Are we all finished at £70? All finished?

-£70 is minus £95.

-Oh, boys...

-That'll be six...

-That's spectacular, that(!)

Minus £156.

Dear, oh, dear, oh, dear - minus 156.

If you're going to lose, lose in style.

Now, is this little box going to save your bacon?

-It's going to have to, I think.

-Going to go with the bonus buy?

Just for the fun of it? I don't blame you.

£12, well done, Anita, you've done the right thing there, girl,

because the auctioneer has estimated £15 to £25 on it.

He thinks you'll double or triple your money on the little box,

so let's see what happens.

At £10 bid. At £10 bid.

Here it comes.

At 15 bid. 20 now. At £20.

25, can I say? At £20.

Well done, Anita. Loving it. Loving your work.

Finished at £20. For the lot, all down.

-£20 is plus eight. Which means that...

-Thanks very much!

..you are now minus 148.

-Competitive(!)

-Minus £148, which is not too bad if you say it quickly.

Anyway, don't say a word to the Reds, all right,

and all will be revealed in a moment.

-Thank you very much, chaps.

-Thanks very much.

-Thank you.

Well, what fun!

I mean, today's programme is a classic example

of how two teams can shop in the same place at the same time

and yet get it so completely wrong,

or right, depending on how you're looking at it.

And the team that is substantially in the wrong today

-just happens to be the Blues.

-Aww.

-Ah, well.

I mean, minus £148 is a pretty hairy old score, isn't it, really?

The nutcrackers made the profit, yeah? Plus £9.

But apart from that, it was a pretty dour do

until you got to Anita's ring box, where you got an £8 profit.

But still, overall, minus £148.

-Wasn't your day, chaps, was it?

-No, not in the end.

Anyway, you've been very sporting about it and brave

and British, which is marvellous. Thank you very much for joining us.

-No problem, it's been a pleasure.

-It's been great. Thank you.

But the victors today go home with £92!

Falling money!

Here we go, girls. There's your £92.

You start out with a white face and then you get £30 on your scales,

£12 on that TERRIBLE tin bath that I was really rude about

and then you get £50 from the man's plough.

I mean, how does all that work out?

Well, it works out to £92 of very well earned profit.

I think you're all shining with glory.

In fact, I've decided to exercise my gift

of the Order of the Golden Gavel

because I felt a white face in these circumstances

was so close to making three profits,

so you girls are going to get a crack at it, all right?

So there we go, personal presentation.

BOTH: Thank you.

The ancient venerable Order of the Golden Gavel, wear it with pride.

-Gosh, they're new ones.

-For your collection, Phil.

Very nice too. It's been super. You happy with that?

-Very happy, thank you.

-Well done, girls. To make all that profit

is a considerable achievement and we love you for it.

In fact, join us soon for some more bargain hunting. Yes?!

ALL: Yes!