Episode 2 Celebrity Eggheads

These people are amongst the greatest quiz players in Britain.

Together they make up the Eggheads,

arguably the most formidable quiz team in the country.

The question is, can they be beaten?

Welcome to a special celebrity issue of Eggheads, the show where

a team of five quiz challengers

pit their wits against possibly the greatest quiz team in Britain.

You might recognise them as Goliaths in the world of TV quiz shows.

They are the Eggheads. Taking on the might

of our quiz Goliaths today are the Breakfast Club.

The team are not only good friends but also represent

the quizzing creme de la creme of BBC news reporting.

Despite being former colleagues, I can assure you

I will be showing them no favouritism whatsoever.

Let's meet them.

I'm Bill Turnbull.

I present Breakfast on BBC One,

the nation's leading breakfast television programme.

Hello, my name's Sian Williams.

I present Breakfast and the news

and I'm really frightened about this quiz.

I'm Nick Robinson, the BBC's political editor,

and just because I have big glasses, doesn't make me clever.

I'm Louise Minchin, I present for BBC News and Breakfast,

which has 10 million viewers a week.

Hello, I'm Charlie Stayt and I present BBC Breakfast

along with my colleagues here and I'm really bad at quizzes.

What on earth are you doing here?

Are you mad? Do you know what these Eggheads are like?

Well, you know what it's like,

lack of sleep doing Breakfast. Just completely dazed and confused.

Stumbled into the wrong studio.

-You were going home and now you're on Eggheads?

-Yes.

Let me explain to you what is going on.

There's £1,000 worth of cash up for grabs for our challengers' chosen charity.

If they fail, the prize money rolls over to the next show.

So, Breakfast Club, the Eggheads won the last game,

which means £2,000 says you can't beat the Eggheads.

The first head-to-head battle is on the subject of Arts & Books.

Who wants to go first?

-Who's going to go for it?

-That's what captain means, isn't it?

I'm the captain. All right. Go on.

-It's your responsibility to lead your troops into battle.

-I'm leading.

Sian, the advantage is you get to choose any Egghead at this point.

Maybe I'll go with CJ.

It would be an honour to beat you, Sian.

-That's fighting talk!

-Gloves off, CJ, gloves off!

-Is it going to be CJ?

-Yes.

-OK.

Let's have Sian and CJ into the question room,

just to make sure you can't confer with your team-mates.

-Sian, would you like to go first or second?

-I'll go first.

OK, first set for you then. Good luck, Sian.

What name is given to a virulent satire in prose or verse

that is a gratuitous and sometimes unjust and malicious attack

on an individual?

I'll go with lampoon, Dermot.

Lampoon it is. It's the right answer. The solid start you wanted.

OK, CJ, first question to you.

What is the first volume in JRR Tolkien's trilogy, The Lord Of The Rings?

I read the trilogy when I was 14 and I'm so glad the films came out

cos I couldn't remember a thing from the books.

-It's The Fellowship Of The Ring.

-Fellowship Of The Ring is correct.

Sian, second question.

Who wrote the 1980s dystopian novel The Handmaid's Tale?

The Handmaid's Tale...

I don't think it's Jeanette Winterson

because I know a lot of her books

and I can't remember that in it.

Margaret Atwood is...ringing a bell. But not that loudly.

And Angela Carter...

Gosh, this was a hopeless category for me, wasn't it?

I'm gonna go with Margaret Atwood.

OK. Lighting it up. No return.

First instinct's usually the best, that's the right answer.

Well done, Sian.

Second question to you, CJ.

Diary Of A Church Mouse is a work by which Poet Laureate?

It just sounds like Betjeman sort of stuff, doesn't it?

Can't imagine it's Jonson.

Doesn't, to me, sound like ... It sounds just the sort of stuff

that Betjeman would do, so I'm going to go for John Betjeman.

John Betjeman, Diary Of A Church Mouse.

Sounds like it.

It is it. It is the right answer.

OK, Sian, if you get this,

and CJ fails with his, you are through to the final round.

Which artist is best known for his giant replica sculptures of everyday objects?

I don't think it's David Smith.

I think it's either Bruce Nauman or Claus Oldenburg.

-Giant...

-Giant replica sculptures of everyday objects.

I'm gonna go with...

You know you say, go with your first instincts?

I am and it's going to be Bruce Nauman.

-Oh, OK.

-Or it might be Claes...no!

I've gone with it now.

-It's Oldenburg.

-Oh, no!

What kind of stuff of the talking about, Eggheads?

They are literally...

-What?

-Hamburgers, chairs. All kinds of things.

Well, a chance for CJ there.

"I have no spur to prick the sides of my intent,

"but only vaulting ambition which o'erleaps itself

"and falls on the other", are lines from which Shakespeare play?

-Hamlet.

-Macbeth.

-Yes!

It's sudden death. Great news, Sian.

Both got that last one wrong.

It means Sian, you get no choices to look at.

Here you go. Who painted the Seagram murals,

commissioned in 1958 for the restaurant in a drinks company's

New York headquarters, and which now hang in Tate Modern?

The first name that came to mind was Mark Rothko.

-Is that your answer?

-I'm just going to go with that one,

because it is painful for everybody else,

going through all my deliberations! So I'm going to go for Rothko.

Mark Rothko. OK. It's painful for CJ, cos that's the right answer.

Not painful for anyone else. Well done, Sian.

CJ, you've got to get this.

Which of Chaucer's Canterbury Tales is a ribald story that culminates

in a young adulterer having his backside burnt with a red hot poker?

No, I don't know. I've only read about two or three of them.

I'm trying to think of any I know with a young man in the title.

I'm sorry, I can't get this.

-The Knight's Tale.

-The Knight's Tale.

OK.

Ending up getting his bottom burnt with a red hot poker.

It's not, and you're being ejected.

Not with a red hot poker. But you're out.

-It is, Eggheads?

-The Miller's Tale.

The Miller's Tale.

The Miller's Tale. The tale of this, Sian, is that you're through.

What a triumph, well done!

Playing in the final round today. Would you both

come back and join your teams.

The Eggheads have lost one brain from the final round.

The Breakfast Club are all still there.

We play our next round today which is Science.

-We had a discussion of that before we started.

-We did have a chat

about who felt comfortable with Science and it's not Bill.

I don't do Science!

-This guy was looking the other way!

-It was you or me, wasn't it?

Yes, it's either Nick or Louise.

-I'm easy.

-Shall we keep you with the politics?

I don't know. Am I going to go? OK.

You do it, Lou, cos then if politics comes up...

-He can do it. That's true.

-Then I can be humiliated.

It's not my best subject. Are we all clear with that?

-We are clear.

-You can only do your best.

But I really want to go with Daphne, cos my granny was called Daphne,

and you look so nice. I know that you probably won't be.

Be gentle with her, Daphne.

Let's have Daphne and Louise into the question room, please.

-Do you want to go first or second?

-I'm going to take Sian's very good example.

She was so calm and she went for the first one.

So I'm going to go first.

OK. First question then, Louise.

What is the term for a female rabbit?

I'm going to go for a doe.

Doe for a female rabbit, a good start. One on the board.

Daphne...

-Think of Louise's granny.

-I will.

In physics, what is chromatics the study?

I've never done physics but chromatics should be colour.

-Chromatics...

-I did Latin.

Ah, well, you worked it out. Colour is correct.

One apiece. Back to you, Louise.

In statistics, what name is given to the middle value in a sample?

OK.

Axis, you turn on,

so it could be but I really don't think it's that one.

I think it's going to be a median, cos I did do Latin as well.

-And it sounds to me...

-Touche, Daphne!

-All right!

Like that should be in the middle.

OK? In the middle, there.

And it is the right answer, yes. Well done.

OK. Daphne,

the Large Hadron Collider which was first put into action

in September 2008

is the world's most powerful example of what type of device?

-It's a particle accelerator.

-Particle accelerator is correct.

Two each. Right, Louise.

This might win it for you. In computer science, what is the name

of thin blank, often white board, on which a prototype circuit is built?

Oh, my goodness. I mean, you know...

You'd think it wouldn't be a cheeseboard or a breadboard,

OR a cuttingboard, to be honest with you!

It's white?

Yes, you listened very carefully to the question.

It's a thin, blank and often white.

Bread is not thin normally, when I eat it in my house.

It's a really intelligent way of going round this!

Cheese is not white, it's got to be a cuttingboard.

Cuttingboard? Your bread's probably not white either. It's a breadboard.

I'm sorry, team. I'm sorry!

You win if you get this, Daphne.

In the electromagnetic spectrum of radiation,

which waves have the shortest wavelength?

-Oh, dear!

-Ha-ha!

I don't know.

When I was at school, our houses were named

after the first four letters of the Greek alphabet,

and I was in Gamma House. So gamma rays.

That's how an Egghead is giving me an answer?

-Is it right?

-Yes, it is right. It is the right answer.

Louise, I apologise on their behalf.

We've asked you along to play and they do that to you!

Random, outrageous guessing.

Well played, Louise. Just caught out on that last question. Bad luck.

Means you won't be playing in the final round.

Daphne, you'll be there.

Would you both please come back and join your teams?

It is all square, both the Breakfast Club and the Eggheads

have lost one brain from the final round. Level pegging.

Our third category today is Film & Television.

The women have played so it's down to the chaps.

Bill, Nick or Charlie.

-Would you like to volunteer, Charlie?

-I'll put myself up for it.

-"Would you like to volunteer"?!

-I'm not claiming I'll be any good.

-That's OK. I wasn't!

-OK. It's Barry, Chris or Kevin for you, Charlie.

-All right.

I've been watching them carefully to see which one sort of nodded

most furiously during the questions. And I think I will go for Kevin.

-Kevin.

-I don't remember nodding at all.

No, that's the reason.

Oh, I see.

He very rarely moves at all.

Have I made a bad mistake?

No, you have to knock them all out to win. OK.

Let's have Charlie and the three-times world quiz champion,

Brain of Britain and Mastermind, Kevin Ashman,

into the question room, please.

-Do you want to go first or second, Charlie?

-I'll go first.

Here you go. Who played the title role in the 2008 film The Duchess?

I think I know this one.

-I'll go for Keira Knightley.

-Did you see it?

-The film?

-Yes.

-You did?

I hope I've got it right.

He's just hoping I'm going to say... It is right, Charlie.

How stupid would I have looked then?

Yeah, I saw it!

I wouldn't do that to you, Charlie. First question, Kevin.

Phil Spencer and Kirsty Allsop present which television programme?

They're property experts, aren't they?

I believe that's Location, Location, Location, etc, etc, etc.

In the sun, by the sea. Buy it now while stocks last.

Location, Location, Location is right. One each. Charlie,

Becky, Darlene and DJ were the children

in the central family of which US TV series?

OK, I'm old enough to remember Happy Days.

And it wasn't Happy Days.

I think I only ever saw The Wonder Years once.

It was kind of a thing about an adolescent boy.

I don't think there was a whole family involved.

I think it was just him. So I'll go for Roseanne.

Roseanne is the right answer, well done. Roseanne Barr.

OK, two to you. Looking good.

Kevin, in the 1940 Howard Hawks comedy His Girl Friday,

what is the profession of Cary Grant's character, Walter Burns?

It's one of the many versions of the story

that's usually called The Front Page.

In this instance, Cary Grant plays the newspaper editor.

That is the correct answer.

So, Charlie,

see if you can get this and put the pressure back on Kevin.

Who wrote the TV drama The Lakes, first broadcast in 1997?

I think that was Jimmy McGovern and... Yeah. Jimmy McGovern.

Jimmy McGovern wrote the Lakes. It's the right answer, Charlie.

Very, very good. I can see you're noticeably relaxing in there.

-You think so?

-Yeah, getting into the groove.

OK, Kevin. Always relaxed. In the 1983 comedy film Trading Places,

who played the the commodities trader Louis Winthorpe III?

It's many years since I saw this.

Well, I saw it when it first came out. So it's 25 years.

But the one who plays the Wall Street man who swaps places

with Eddie Murphy's hustler is, I believe, Dan Aykroyd.

-Yep, Dan Aykroyd.

-Dan Aykroyd.

It's the right answer. You're trading blows.

It's all square, we go to sudden death.

Charlie, we remove those potential answers for you.

You've just got to give me one from your own lips.

Which actor played the part of Dr David Banner

in the TV series The Incredible Hulk which ran from 1978 to 1982?

Can I answer another question?

If I get that right, can you give me that point?

OK, the guy who play the Hulk.

I can give you him. Lou Ferrigno.

I think that's brilliant, myself. But we want Dr David Banner.

-No. I'll have to pass.

-OK. Kevin, do you know?

Bill Bixby. You see, you did know it.

-Bill Bixby, Charlie?

-It rings a bell now...

The Hulk was better, he was the main part, wasn't he? Do I get a point?

You can join the Eggheads, with that kind of knowledge,

I tell you!

It means, Kevin, you can win it if you get this.

Which film of the 1990s completed a clean sweep

of the Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor,

Best Actress and Best Adapted Screenplay awards at the Oscars?

-So what's that, one, two, three...?

-Five.

Sorry, I wasn't casting aspersions on your maths or anything like that.

I could just about get over five.

Over ten, I have to take my shoes and socks off.

I think it won some more as well.

I think it was The Silence Of The Lambs.

Silence Of The Lambs? What year?

'91. The awards were for '91.

The awards were made in '92.

Yes, Silence Of The Lambs is correct, Kevin.

Which means not a clean sweep but a squeak through there.

Kevin, you're into the final round. Charlie just missed out.

Would you both please come back and join your teams?

The balance tipping ever so slightly in favour of the Eggheads.

They still lost that one brain from the final round,

although the Breakfast Club have now lost two.

Time for a pep-talk there, captain Sian.

Here's your next, and last, subject -

last chance to knock an Egghead out. It's Sport.

It's Bill or Nick. Don't look down there, Nick, it's up this way!

-It's between you two.

-I'll go for it.

-You going for it?

-It's a bit more you than me, is what Nick was saying.

-They held me back!

-You could get it.

-We're done on rounds.

-Yeah, OK. Sport.

-It is one of the two at the end, Barry or Chris.

-We'll have Barry.

Barry, OK. Let's have Bill and Barry into the question room, please.

-OK, Bill, which you like to go first or second?

-Oh, we'll kick off.

Good luck.

Which football club signed Robinho for Real Madrid for a British record

transfer fee of £32.5m in September 2008?

This was a big sports story at the beginning of the season.

He was supposed to go to Chelsea, but went to Manchester City.

Manchester City is right.

OK... Barry.

"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee,"

is a famous quotation attributed to which boxer?

It's the man who was voted Sports Person Of The Century

and it was Muhammad Ali.

Muhammad Ali, quite right. Second question, Bill.

The major league baseball team known as the Mets

play home games in which American city?

I happened to drive past the stadium just a few weeks ago. It's New York.

New York is correct. Two to you.

OK, Barry.

Which European golfer won back-to-back Majors in 2008,

when he triumphed in the Open and the US PGA Championship?

I was praying when you asked the question that Padraig Harrington

came up, and lo and behold, there it is. So there's my answer.

The Open and the US PGA. Harrington?

Yes, it's the right answer. All square.

Bill. Which Essex batsman scored

201 not out in a one-day match against Leicestershire in 2008?

I'm not so good at cricket. I'm really not good at county cricket.

HE SIGHS

I'm gonna take just a complete stab in the dark

and go for James Foster.

It's Ravi Bopara, Bill.

Barry, a chance for you to win.

Oh, and a sport I know you know something about.

Clive Sullivan, who captained Great Britain to victory

in the 1972 Rugby League World Cup, was born in which city?

I may know something about rugby league,

but I don't know where Clive Sullivan was born.

I really don't know but something's telling me that,

with a name as English as O'Sullivan, it's probably not London.

So I'll take a blind guess and say Edinburgh.

Welsh by birth - Cardiff.

Yes, we knew that!

You knew that? OK. A chance then, Bill. We go to sudden death.

No more of those choices. Do you know this?

Ellen Stawell-Brown, the first woman to serve overarm at Wimbledon,

was the great-grandmother of which English tennis player?

It's confusing cos you think, it will be a female tennis player,

but not necessarily.

Brown. Great-grandmother.

Overarm.

It would have been in the days of long skirts.

Great-grandmother, take down two generations, somebody current.

I really don't know why I think this, but could it be Andy Murray?

OK. It's not Andy Murray.

-It's Tim Henman.

-Oh! That was the other name I had in my head.

I bet it was. Tiger Tim.

OK, another chance for you, Barry.

Which British Formula One driver

holds the record for the most pole positions in one season?

I am toying with Jim Clark or Nigel Mansell.

I know Nigel Mansell, when he won the title,

won a number of Grand Prix on the trot, which was a record.

Because he won the most on the trot, I think I'll go for Nigel Mansell.

It is the right answer.

Yes. Nigel Mansell in 1992.

Do you know how many pole positions he got out of 16 races?

-15, wasn't it?

-14. And he won nine of the 16 races that season.

Barry has just won this particular race.

Means no place for you, Bill, in the final round.

Barry, you will be there. Would you both come back and join your teams?

So, this is what we've been playing towards.

It's time for the final round - General Knowledge.

I'm afraid those of you who lost your head-to-heads

won't be allowed to take part.

Bill, Louise and Charlie, from Breakfast Club,

and CJ from the Eggheads, would you leave the studio, please?

Sian and Nick, you're playing to win the Breakfast Club £2,000.

Kevin, Daphne, Chris and Barry, you're playing for something

no amount of money can buy - the Eggheads' reputation.

As usual, I'll ask each team three questions in turn, this time the

questions are all General Knowledge and you can confer.

Breakfast Club, the question is,

-are your two brains better than the Eggheads' four?

-SIAN: I doubt it!

Sian and Nick, would you like to go first or second?

Shall we go first? I think so.

OK. Off we go. General Knowledge, best of luck.

Prince William caused a furore in the British media when he used

which piece of military equipment to visit his girlfriend Kate Middleton?

It would have been funnier if it had been a tank?

Yes, but we're going with helicopter.

Helicopter is correct. Good start, Breakfast Club.

One to you.

Jenni Murray became the regular presenter of which

long-running radio show in 1987?

My mum used to listen to this, with me sitting on her lap.

It was Woman's Hour.

Woman's Hour is right, Eggheads. You're off to a good start.

OK, Nick and Sian.

What is the first name of Andrew Lloyd Webber's cellist brother?

We're going with Julian, Dermot.

It's two out of two. Julian is correct.

Julian Lloyd Webber. OK, Eggheads.

A gurdwara is a place of worship in which religion?

Yeah, it's a Sikh temple, Dermot.

Gurdwara and Sikhism.

Correct, Eggheads. Two to you.

If you get this, it could win it for you.

Which news reporter was famously barged out of the way

by Margaret Thatcher's press secretary, Bernard Ingham, when he

tried to interview her on the steps of the Paris Embassy in 1990?

It's twinkle toes, isn't it?

A man who's built his career by being in the wrong place

-at the wrong time, and dancing a lot.

-John Sergeant.

John Sergeant, of course it is.

Gives you the lead and will give you the money

if the Eggheads get this wrong. Eggheads...

Suspiria and Inferno are horror films directed by whom?

That's Dario Argento, Dermot.

How do you know these things?! That is right.

I thought that might get 'em.

OK, it's all square, sudden death.

Sian and Nick, which abstract Expressionist painter

produced the works, Autumn Rhythm and Lavender Mist?

The name that came into my head was Paul Klee,

but I don't know that that's right.

I don't recognise the titles at all,

so I'm guessing on a style of painting.

It wasn't Howard Hodgkin, was it?

I'm going to pump with you, because you got things right earlier.

-Well...

-Go for it.

Because Klee does those little...doesn't he? Little squares.

-Bits of colour, therefore you wouldn't expect it to be...

-Abstract?

Abstract Expressionist painter.

I don't think we're going to get this. Just try that one.

-Shall I?

-Yeah, go for it.

Well, I'm going to go with Harold Hodgkin, but I've got...

It doesn't feel right in my bones.

Howard Hodgkin is your answer?

He's doing that thing, isn't he?

He is doing that kind of... Daphne's looking pleadingly at me.

You think not Paul Klee, because of the bits of colour?

It's only the way he reacted. It worried me.

We'll go with him, then.

Is that your answer?

-Is it Kli or Klee?

-Klee.

-Paul Klee.

-Yeah.

-OK. Paul Klee we have taken.

-It's Howard Hodgkin!

Don't say it's Howard Hodgkin.

-It's not Howard Hodgkin, but it's not Paul Klee, either.

-Who is it?

-Eggheads, do you know?

-Jackson Pollock.

-Jackson Pollock, of course.

Again, with the list there I reckon you'd have gone for old Jackson.

First one wrong in the entire game so far.

Eggheads, which Italian car mark uses a trident symbol

on the front of its cars?

CJ knows, but he's gone! You knocked him out.

-It's not Ferrari, that's a snake.

-Ferrari's got the horse.

-Alfa Romeo's the snake.

-Oh, Ferrari's the prancing horse.

Lamborghini, I think might be. Is Lamborghini a bull?

One of them uses a ball.

I thought Maserati.

Sounds reasonable.

It's all square, if it's wrong. We'll go with Maserati, Dermot.

Maserati. OK.

Maserati you've gone for.

It is the correct answer, Eggheads. You've won.

-Couldn't have been tighter. Couldn't have been tighter.

-Well...

One question in it. You know what you were up against.

You're very good, I'll give you that. Very good.

Bad luck, Breakfast Club. Thank you for playing.

Bill, Louise and Charlie.

Gallant effort in those head-to-heads.

Thanks for sparing the time to take on the Eggheads.

But the Eggheads have done what comes naturally to them.

I'm afraid you haven't won the £2,000, which means that the money

rolls over to the next show.

Eggheads, congratulations. Who will beat you?

Join us next time to see if a team of celebrity sports stars

will have the brains to defeat the Eggheads.

Until then, goodbye.

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