Episode 2 Celebrity Eggheads

These people are amongst the greatest quiz-players in Britain.

Together they make up the Eggheads,

arguably the most formidable quiz team in the country.

The question is - can they be beaten?

Welcome to a special celebrity edition of Eggheads.

The show where a team of five quiz-challengers

pit their wits against possibly the greatest quiz team in Britain.

They are the Eggheads.

And tackling our awesome quiz titans today are the Serial Quizzers.

Now, I'm hoping this team of familiar faces from some of the

country's most popular serial dramas will be able to help me here,

cos I think it's time we made a programme all about the dramas

that go on behind the scenes right here at Eggheads.

Pat gives us the twists at every end of series party,

Barry, of course, is prone to murdering the odd

karaoke tune or two.

It's true.

And of course what does every good drama need?

Well, Chris's steamy love affairs.

Let's meet our challengers.

My name is Mark Moraghan.

I've been pulling faces for 30 years

and you can find me in a theatre near you.

My name is Ian Aspinall.

You may recall me from Holby City, City Central,

and the eldest brother in East Is East.

Hello, my name's Nick Cochrane.

I am the slimmer member of the McDonald family

from Coronation Street.

Hello, my name is Paul Usher.

You might remember me from The Bill and Brookside,

and there's a few other programmes I've closed down as well.

Hi, my name's Dean Sullivan and if you were a fan of Brookside

you may remember that I played Jimmy Corkhill for many years.

Welcome to you, Serial Quizzers.

Helping us out there with the Egghead plots.

Do you need a bit of help with this quizzing,

or are you pretty good at it?

Yeah, we're nervous but eager, shall we say.

You must've played in a few pub quizzes and whatever in your time.

The odd one or two.

What made you decide that you could put together this elite team,

Mark, that could beat the Eggheads?

Well, to be honest we just wanted a day out. No...

No, in all seriousness,

we just thought it was a good opportunity to hold up our end

as actors and show those guys what it's all about, really.

-Who watches it? Who watches Eggheads?

-I certainly do.

-I've seen it, yeah.

-Good, good.

Any kind of game-plan worked out?

Just to snuff Chris out first of all, really, I think.

Look, he's got his game face on. We'll see if you can do that.

OK, let's play the game, then.

Every day there's £1,000 worth of cash

up for grabs for our challengers' chosen charity,

however, if they fail to defeat the Eggheads,

the prize money will roll over onto our next show.

So, Serial Quizzers the Eggheads have won just the last game,

that means £2,000 says you can't beat the Eggheads.

And let's start, shall we, you all know the rules.

We've told you all about it, you've seen it yourself.

Our first head-to-head battle, that's where you try

and knock an Egghead out, is going to be on Science.

Pick a player.

-What do you reckon?

-I pulled the short straw.

-You did, you fancied science.

-That's right.

I think Nick's going to play for it.

-OK.

-I'll go for the science one. Erm...

Doesn't leave me a great deal of options. I'll erm... Daphne.

Want to go for Daphne? I'll see if I can take Daphne on.

-She's a pretty good all-rounder, but, yeah, OK.

-We'll go with that.

I'll go for the girl. That's the best start.

-The lady.

-The lady. Sorry.

All right, then, it has been decided.

It's going to be Nick from the Serial Quizzers,

Daphne from the Eggheads.

It's our opening round, it's Science,

and would you both please go to the Question Room so you can't confer?

OK, Nick, Andy McDonald. How old were you when you got that part?

-I was 15 years old. Long time ago.

-15 years. When was it, then?

1989 was my first appearance on the show.

-You must've been six(!)

-Thanks very much.

I'll take that as a huge compliment, Dermot, thanks very much.

So why are you playing Science? What do you know about it?

Just the short straw, really.

I don't think any of the other guys were comfortable with it, so erm...

No, I did. I said that I'd do it earlier on. So, I'll stick by that.

Well, let's see how you do. You get to choose your challenger.

Do you want to go first or second?

I will go first, please, Dermot.

All right, good luck, Nick. First Science question coming up.

Which of these is a name often given to the lair of a badger or fox?

Hmm.

Erm... A ba...

I thought it was a set. I'm obviously way off the mark.

Erm...

Earth, maybe.

It'll be under the ground.

Venus, I can't see it.

I might be wrong.

Saturn...

I'm drawn to Saturn, but I'm going to say Earth.

OK. Thank goodness you did.

-Because it's the right answer.

-Good.

The other guys were kind of shouting a bit. I wasn't going to tell you.

You get the right answer. Daphne's first question.

What name is used to refer to a person who treats bodily disorders

by manipulation of the spine and other parts, Daphne?

That is a Chiropractor.

Just thinking of an obstetrician. They've only got one job.

Yep. OK.

Yes, chiropractor is the right answer.

Manipulates spines and other parts.

It's all square. Nick's second question.

During the process known as photosynthesis

green plants manufacture carbohydrates

from water and which gas?

Erm...

I wouldn't have thought nitrogen. Erm...

Quite a lot of hydrogen around but I don't think it's that,

and from memory from school I think we as humans breathe in oxygen

and breathe out carbon dioxide, and plants do the reverse.

So I'll go for carbon dioxide.

Carbon dioxide is the right answer.

You have two. Daphne.

After which scientist is the bacterium known as e-coli named?

He is Escherich.

And no, I don't know his Christian name.

That's all right cos we've offered you the options.

So you don't have to give us his first name.

Escherich in e-coli. Correct.

Well, going really well here, Nick.

Keep this up and you've got a chance for a place in the final round.

Malacology - I'll spell it in a bit - Malacology is the term for

the study of what?

It's M-A-L-A-C-O-L-O-G-Y.

Malacology. Erm...

I can't see it being meteors.

That doesn't sound right, although I could very much be wrong. Erm...

The study of mirrors? Do you need to study mirrors?

I'll go for molluscs.

Good man. It's the right answer! That's a great answer.

Well, now, you have a real chance getting into the final round.

Got to hope Daphne doesn't get this, of course.

Daphne, Haast's Eagle, the largest known to science,

lived in which location before dying out roughly 500 years ago?

Haast's Eagle. H-A-A-S-T-S.

I think he's got a very good chance of being in the final

cos I don't have a clue.

Erm...

Greenland?

Greenland.

Are you going to soar like the eagle, or have your wings clipped?

-Let's see.

-Wings clipped.

-The answer is New Zealand.

-Oh!

Plummeting to earth!

It means what a triumph there for Nick.

Into the final round. Prepare yourself.

Beating Daphne there, that's quite a scalp.

Would you both please come back and join your teams.

Well, what a triumph there.

Nick negotiating the badgers, foxes and molluscs of science.

Daphne not negotiating the Eagles,

confirming his place in the final round.

That means as it stands the Serial Quizzers are all there.

The Eggheads have lost one brain

and we've got three more head-to-heads to come.

We move onto our next one. This is Food & Drink.

Plenty of you should like this one. Food & Drink.

Shall I take it?

I'll take it if you want me to take it.

OK. I'll have a go at Food & Drink.

And choose an Egghead.

Remember, it can't be Daphne. Any of the other four.

Food & Drink. OK...

I think I'd like to play against Dave.

You may. All right.

Let's have Mark and Dave heading for the Question Room, please.

So, Mark, are you playing the Food & Drink round on the basis of

your MasterChef appearance?

Well, foolishly, probably yes.

-But you must've gone on that show with a bit of a love for it.

-Yeah.

Food's always been a passion

and it wasn't until I was given the opportunity to do MasterChef.

You don't think you'll get past the first round

and then the passion for food

and the whole competition takes hold of you and it takes over your life.

Yeah. The other thing I want to mention about your auspicious career

is of course... This is going to make Chris very jealous here,

is the appearance, what was it, the Just The Two Of Us?

-Yeah, I did a bit of singing on Just The Two Of Us.

-But who was it with?

-This is what makes quiz shows.

-Ah.

Natasha Hamilton, Atomic Kitten.

I'm not interested in the personnel of radioactive moggy,

thank you very much.

Radioactive moggy. Very good. Right, OK.

Let's play the round Food & Drink, and you get to choose, Mark,

first or second?

I think I'll go second, please.

Puts Dave in to start, then.

Dave, Bollinger and Deutz are names associated with

the production of which beverage?

It's not tea. Lager tends to be my favourite tipple.

But er, Mrs Dave likes champagne,

so I'll get used to forking out for that.

Champagne is the right answer.

Easy start there for Dave.

Mark, the brandy kirsch is traditionally made by double

distilling the fermented juice of what type of cherry?

I don't think it's manchego,

and I'm torn between muscadet and morello.

Oh...

I'm going to plum, I think, for muscadet.

OK, muscadet, it is not, no. Not a type of cherry.

I think there's only one type of cherry there, isn't there,

Eggheads, which is morello.

-All right. Bet you would've got the Bollinger question.

-Yeah.

OK, well, you're on the second set. Dave, you're going first.

Here's your second question.

The herb chervil has a delicate flavour of what?

I'm not sure about this. Erm...

It's something I should know.

Er... I'm going to plump for aniseed. Just on a whim.

Your whim is the right answer.

Yeah, you have two, making it difficult for Mark,

but you need this, then, Mark.

Which snack celebrated its 250th anniversary in 2012?

I don't think it was the hamburger. Although, I could be wrong.

Sausage roll, that doesn't really jump out at me,

so I'm going to plump for the old sandwich.

Yes, it is. Well done.

And which Egghead will tell me the story of how it was invented?

The sandwich?

Inveterate gambler wouldn't get up from the table to have his dinner.

He said to his footman, "Fetch me a slice of meat

"between two slices of bread."

And that became known as a sandwich and...

-Hence all these sandwich shops all over the place.

-Right.

250 years ago from 2012. All right.

Well, you got that, Mark,

kept you in it, but Dave can knock you out if he gets this.

In 2008 Helene Darroze replaced Angela Hartnett

as chef in the restaurant of which hotel?

I haven't heard of this at all. I don't follow...

They're not exactly places that I go and eat in.

I'll go with The Dorchester just for a guess.

OK, The Dorchester, you've been getting all the hoity-toity

questions, haven't you, with your...

I have, as I said, just for a low-brow person like me.

You know, not good.

-It is The Connaught.

-Fair enough.

Of course, Mark's got his regular table there. He would've known that.

Just reserved. Don't let anyone else sit there.

ALl right, well, that's... This could be a good revival.

If you get this we're into sudden death.

What is the meaning of the Aztec word xocolatl,

from which the English word chocolate derives?

-Xocolatl is X-O-C-O-L-A-T-L.

-OK. Erm...

I don't think it's Bitter Water.

That really doesn't conjure up chocolate to me.

Erm...

Pepper Plant, I've heard of using pepper with chocolate, but er...

It's...

Sounds like it could be Sacred Nectar,

so I think I'll plump for Sacred Nectar.

OK, Sacred Nectar to make it all square.

It's not.

It is Bitter Water.

Bitter Water, I suppose, yeah, you can

have quite bitter chocolate, can't you? Look at that.

Well, Dave's just managed it.

I tell you what, if I go home to my wife and tell her that

I've beaten somebody who's competed in MasterChef on Food & Drink,

she's not going to believe me in a million years.

I'm so shocked. Is there a doctor in the house to help me out?

-Not to help you anyway.

-Oh!

All right. Well, let's confirm it.

Dave's in the final round depriving Mark.

Would you both please come back and join your teams.

Dave exhibiting his fine tastes in Food & Drink.

Oh, yeah. Of course. Proper gastronome, me.

That's right.

Means that both teams have lost one brain from the final round.

It's all square. Next head-to-head is Arts & Books.

Who'd like to play this?

THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER

-I'll have a go.

-And who would you like to pick from the Eggheads?

You can't play Daphne or Dave,

so we go further down the line for Chris, Barry or Pat.

-Pat.

-Yeah, I'm going to go for Pat.

Yeah, Pat?

All right, let's have Dean and Pat into the Question Room, please.

Dean taking the Arts & Books.

You've been doing some directing as well, haven't you?

I have done during my illustrious career, yes.

What most recently?

Well, recently I got involved with a project about the World War I poet

Wilfred Owen. That was a challenging piece.

And just remind us about those Corkhill years.

You were Jimmy Corkhill, it was a long time, wasn't it?

It was a long time.

18 years I played Jimmy and I was the last man standing on The Close

as well, which was a great honour to have.

But, yeah, I had some fantastic storylines,

enjoyed every minute of it. It was great.

The number of actors such as yourself, Paul,

obviously Mark as well

and so many others that came out of that great flowering,

and the way that really took British television

-by the scruff of the neck.

-It did.

It was a brand-new way of filming a TV series.

That made it quite unique

and dealt with very realistic storylines as well.

And as you mentioned there, Dermot, some of the greatest names

in our industry now are there at the top came from Brookside.

-The likes of Sue Johnston, Ricky Tomlinson, Mark, Paul.

-Yeah.

-And yourself, of course.

-Thank you.

-Let's play the round.

-Do you want to go first or second?

-I think I'll go first.

Good luck. First question.

The Neil Simon plays Plaza Suite

and California Suite are both set in what type of establishment?

Well, it's a great American play.

Definitely not set in a library, and erm...

If my memory serves me right, they were not set in a hotel, either,

so I'm going to go for hospital.

Ah, your memory lets you down. It's hotel.

It is a hotel. Let's see how Pat does with his first one.

Pat, who won the 2012 Booker Prize becoming the first British author

to win the prize twice?

I think she set a whole series of milestones.

The first woman, the first Briton

and the first sequel to win the prize.

Hilary Mantel.

For Bring Up The Bodies.

I was going to ask the book in question.

It is the right answer. So, Dean, we need to get you moving.

In Gulliver's Travels the residents of Lilliput

bury their dead in which position?

Erm...

I remember reading this book at school a long, long time ago.

Horizontally face down, I would say not.

And erm, vertically head first, I would say not.

So I'm going to go for vertically standing up.

OK, vertically standing up.

It is vertically, but head first.

So, well...

Pat has a chance to clinch the round with this second question.

Pat, the Norwich school which flourished in the early 19th century

was particularly associated with paintings of what?

Early 1800s.

I supposed they could have caught the start of the...

The middle of the industrial revolution.

Children, erm...

I have a faint feeling this is landscapes.

That they were keen landscape painters.

The answer is landscapes. You are right, which is bad news for Dean.

You can't match that score, even if you face another question,

so the round's over.

That means no place for you in the final round, Dean.

Would you both please come back and join your teams.

Well, Serial Quizzers, you've let your guard down.

You went into the lead, now the Eggheads are in the lead.

They've knocked two of you out and one of them's still gone.

So, this is our last head-to-head before the final round,

so a chance to make it all square, and it should be on pretty sound

territory for you because it is Film & Television.

And we've only got two players left. Paul or Ian.

-You want to do it?

-Yeah.

-Go on.

-Leave the brains to the final.

-OK.

-Yeah, it's going to be me.

-All right.

-Now choose from either Chris or Barry.

-Erm... Yeah.

-I think unanimous, we're going to go with Chris.

-OK, it's unanimous.

All chosen him. It's Ian, you've got to play him.

Ian and Chris into the Question Room, please.

Ian, good to see you here.

Barry, the big Corrie fan here wants me to start with that man

who attacked and rid us of Brian Tilsley.

That's a fantastic accolade to have. It's better than a BAFTA, isn't it?

It's pretty good, yeah.

-Do you still get remembered for that?

-Erm...

-I will now.

-You will do now, exactly.

It took me a while to live it down, but it keeps creeping back.

Yeah, well, then of course you tried to change the image a bit

and how, in Holby City. That erm...

-Lovely character to play, I guess, wasn't it?

-Fantastic, yeah.

Very, very lucky. Mubbs.

Again, do people think you're like that?

Er... Some do, some don't.

He is.

Some people here do as well, on your team.

-It's not true.

-Of course not. Well, Film & Television.

-Make your choice now, do you want to go first or second?

-Erm...

Let's go first.

OK, Ian, here you go.

In the TV sitcom Dad's Army what is the profession of

Captain Mainwaring?

Hmmm.

For some reason I don't think fishmonger rings a bell.

Solicitor or bank manager... Hmm...

I'm going to go for bank manager.

Phew. Yes, it's the right answer.

Captain Mainwaring and his bank.

Chris, what is the name of the character

played by Johnny Depp in the Pirates Of The Caribbean series of films?

He's Captain Jack Sparrow.

Yes, he is. And so back to Ian.

Which TV costume drama starred Robin Ellis as Ross

and Angharad Rees as his wife Demelza?

Not sure of Poldark. Don't really remember that so much.

Upstairs, Downstairs...

I watched a few, but the names don't ring a bell,

so I'm kind of going for Brideshead.

It's not Brideshead.

-I think other members of your team know. Serial Quizzers?

-Poldark.

It's Poldark. Poldark there we wanted.

And a chance for the lead, then, Chris.

Doctors Lisa Cuddy and James Wilson are characters in which

American TV series?

Well, they're not friends of Seinfeld.

They're not part of the Barone family and Everybody Loves Raymond,

so they've got to be sidekicks of House, Hugh Laurie.

-House?

-Hmm.

-It's the right answer.

Ian, do you watch... I mean, having been in Holby City,

do you keep an eye on the medical dramas?

Not really. Not really.

All right. Well, you need to get this to stay in the game.

In 2012 which director won his second Palme d'Or

at the Cannes Film Festival for his film Amour?

I don't know. Erm...

I'm going to go for Ken Loach, but it is a wild guess, really.

-Yeah.

-All right, Ken loach.

A guess at Ken Loach to try and stay in the game.

It's all over, it's not the right answer.

It is Michael Haneke with Amour.

Which means you will not be in the final round.

It's going to be Paul and Nick there representing the Serial Quizzers.

Would you both please come back and join your teams.

And so this is what we've been playing towards.

It is time for the final round,

which as always is general knowledge,

but I'm afraid those of you who lost your head-to-heads won't be

allowed to take part in this round.

So Mark, Ian and Dean from the Serial Quizzers,

and Daphne from the Eggheads, would you leave the studio now, please.

So, Nick and Paul, you're playing to win the Serial Quizzers £2,000.

Dave, Chris, Barry and Pat,

you're playing for something which money can't buy.

The Eggheads' reputation.

And as usual I'll ask each team three questions in turn,

this time the questions are all general knowledge

and you are allowed to confer,

that's the big difference from those head-to-heads.

So, Serial Quizzers, the question is - are your two brains better

than the Eggheads' four?

And Nick and Paul, would you like to go first or second?

Your choice again.

-What do you think?

-We'll go first, please, Dermot.

Was that the right answer?

That was the easier set of questions.

I'll give you a nice big tick for that. Tick for politeness.

Best of luck.

Let's see how you do with these three,

and it could be more if we get into sudden death.

First question for you.

Which singer had a UK top ten single with The Edge Of Glory in 2011?

Lady Gaga.

Got to be, isn't it?

I don't think it was any of the other two.

Why are you looking at me, Dermot?

Just looking at you to see if you're going to go for it.

-Is that your answer?

-Yes. Lady Gaga.

-You're totally sure about that, aren't you?

-Yes.

-Did you buy it?

-No.

-No?

It's one of the worst songs I've ever heard.

Recommend it to Chris, then.

It's the right answer. Yep, you knew that.

And Eggheads, which Northamptonshire house has been the ancestral home

of the Spencer family since the 16th century?

Althorp. Pronounced "All-trop."

I've just been given a lesson in pronunciation.

It's where the late Lady Diana is buried and it's Althorp.

Yeah, you can say it both ways.

Althorp.

It is the right answer. Yes, well done, Eggheads.

Serial Quizzers, after that good start, second question.

The Empire State Building in New York is an example of which

architectural style?

It's not Art Deco, is it? Cos that's all curved and...

Like they have in Miami.

-Erm, I think...

-Rococo.

-Yeah, I'd go for that as well.

I think we're unanimously going with that.

Or are we not? You changing your mind?

Empire State Building in New York is an example of which

architectural style?

Can't be Art Deco, is it Art Deco? It's not...

Art Deco...

See, now... Oh...

-All right...

-No, no, no, don't you start. Don't say it's down to me.

-What do you mean...

-No, no, don't say I'm saying it cos of you...

It's definitely not Moorish. So that's out the window.

You reckon Art Deco then, yeah?

I just thought it was all...

..curvy, Art Deco on the corners, I didn't think it was...

-Art Deco is like Miami, isn't it?

-Yeah.

We'll go with Rococo, please, boss.

OK, Rococo after deliberating there,

-but jumping in with the wrong answer. It's Art Deco.

-Oh, no!

-See, you talked me out of it!

-I didn't talk you out of it.

Can I take him outside and beat him across...

Soon as this is over.

OK, well the Eggheads have a chance to get the lead here then.

Eggheads, to which celebrity did Justin Timberlake become engaged

in 2011?

-Jessica Biel.

-Yeah. Jessica Biel, yeah.

Amazingly we all knew this, including Chris.

It was Jessica Biel.

-Chris, you didn't really know it, did you?

-No, Dave knew it.

Oh, you just picked it up from him. You fooled Barry.

It is the right answer. OK.

Well, it means you need this, Serial Quizzers.

So, listen up Nick and Paul.

The swimmer Charlene Wittstock,

who became the wife of Prince Albert of Monaco in 2011,

represented which country at the 2000 Olympic games?

-South Africa.

-Ooh!

I've got to go with you.

-You don't hang about, do you?

-I've got to go with you.

If I'd done that before I would've had the right answer,

but I listened to him.

South Africa.

It's the right answer.

Well done, mate. Perfect.

OK, well, you've got a chance.

you've got to hope the Egghead's don't get this.

-Dermot, can you give them a hard one, please?

-I'll do my very best.

-A special hard one.

-They've been coasting up till now.

Here you go. Well, they are the Eggheads.

Your question, Eggheads.

The French sportsman Jean Tigana made his name in which sport?

Football, definitely. He became manager of Fulham and France.

I'm getting chapter and verse here, but apparently

he was manger of Fulham and France, so that puts him as a footballer.

Jean Tigana...

Football is the right answer. Eggheads, you've won!

That was a storming-ish performance in the final round there.

If it just wasn't for your Empire State Building...

I'm never going to live that down now, I tell you.

Don't know what's going to happen on the way back.

He's not going back(!)

Art Deco stuff around the top of the Empire State Building.

We won't dwell on that. What we will dwell on is the fact that you took

time on your busy schedules to come up and play the Eggheads,

and for that we thank you very much.

We also thank you for all the fun we've had while we've been quizzing.

But it wasn't to be on the day, and thanks to all the guys back there

in the Question Room - Mark, Ian and Dean. Thanks a lot, guys.

But those Eggheads have done what comes naturally to them

and they still reign supreme over Quizland.

I'm afraid you haven't won the £2,000.

That means the money rolls over to the next show.

And Eggheads, congratulations. Who will beat you?

Join us next time to see if a team from breakfast television

and radio have the brains to defeat the Eggheads.

£3,000 says they don't. Until then, goodbye.

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