Episode 1 Celebrity Mastermind

Four celebrities who hope they know everything about their specialist subjects,

but can they cut it on television's toughest quiz?

They've agreed to put themselves

in the hotseat for their chosen charity,

but only one person can be the winner.

Who will be crowned tonight's Celebrity Mastermind?

Our first celebrity in the spotlight tonight is food critic Jay Rayner.

He answers questions on the musicals of Sondheim.

The National Lottery presenter, OJ Borg,

will be hoping it's his lucky night with his specialist subject,

the Star Wars trilogy.

The man who always pays his way, travel writer Simon Calder

answers questions on Concorde,

and from the band Blue, Anthony Costa.

His specialist subject - the comic exploits of Only Fools and Horses.

Hello, I'm John Humphrys and welcome to Celebrity Mastermind.

Tonight, four contenders will face television's ultimate test

of nerve and knowledge.

They will have to answer one-and-a-half minutes of questions on their specialist subject

and then two minutes on general knowledge.

The reward for the winner is this handsome trophy and much more importantly,

the kudos of becoming one of the nation's Masterminds.

So let's get on with it and ask our first contender to join us, please.

-And your name is?

-My name is Jay Rayner.

-Your charity?

-My charity is Sense, which supports people with deaf or blind issues.

-And your chosen subject?

-The musicals of Stephen Sondheim.

Sondheim musicals. One and-a-half minutes starting now.

In Sweeney Todd, who admits to preparing the worst pies in London?

-Mrs Crockett?

-Lovett.

Which musical with Sondheim lyrics opened on Broadway in September 1957

includes the songs I Have A Love and Somewhere?

West Side Story.

In his book, Finishing The Hat,

Sondheim describes the success of a song from A Little Light Music as "a mystery".

-Which song?

-Send In The Clowns.

Which musical with lyrics by Sondheim opened on Broadway

on the 21st May 1959 and included Ethel Merman singing Everything's Coming Up Roses?

-Gypsy.

-Sondheim criticised his own lyric for which song in West Side Story

as, "not unwelcome in Noel Coward's living room?"

I Feel Pretty.

Which song replaced Love Is In The Air

as the opening number of A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum?

Comedy Tonight.

What's the shared name of two characters in Sunday In The Park With George

who sing The One On The Left?

No idea.

Which celebrated director worked with Sondheim

on all of his original musicals that debuted on Broadway in the '70s?

Harold Prince.

In Sweeney Todd, what's the name of the rival barber

and creator of the Miracle Elixir?

Erm, don't know.

Which Sondheim musical that premiered in 1917

has five separate stories dealing with marriage?

-Company.

-Sondheim collaborated with which composer

for the 1965 musical, Do I Hear a Waltz?

-Richard Rodgers.

-Which Sondheim musical that tells the story of a number of people

who try to kill a US president originally opened off-Broadway?

Assassins.

A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum is based on farces by a Roman dramatist.

Who was he?

BEEP Aristophanes.

No, it was Titus Maccius Plautus, to be precise.

But who knew? Well, you were meant to, obviously.

You had two passes.

In Sweeney Todd,

the assumed name of the rival barber was Adolfo Pirelli

and the shared name of those characters in Sunday In The Park With George, Celeste.

-You have, Jay, nine points.

-APPLAUSE

And our next contender, please.

LAUGHTER

-We'll come to that later. Your name.

-OJ Borg.

-Your favoured charity?

Manchester Dogs' Home.

-And your chosen subject, as if it weren't obvious?

-Big men in dresses.

-Sorry, it is the Star Wars original trilogy.

-Star Wars original trilogy.

Minute and-a-half. Before the main theme and opening prologues,

what ten words introduce each episode of Star Wars?

In a, erm... In a galaxy a long...

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

Which pioneering special effects studio set up by George Lucas

created the space battles and environments in the Star Wars films?

Industrial Light & Magic.

How does Obi Wan refer to the energy field created by all living things?

It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the galaxy together.

The Force.

When Han finds Luke half-frozen on the ice planet Hoth,

where does he put him to warm up while he builds shelter?

He puts him in the guts of a Tauntaun.

Which port on Tatooine does Obi Wan describe as a wretched hive of scum and villainy?

Mos Eisley.

When the Millennium Falcon's experiencing engine troubles

during the evacuation of Hoth, what does Leia sarcastically offer to do?

Pass.

Which race of trader scavengers on Tatooine wear long, hooded robes

and have no visible features except for their glowing, yellow eyes?

-Jaw jaws.

-No, Jawas.

After escaping from Hoth, Luke flies to the Dagobah system.

What has Obi Wan told him he must do there?

Find a Jedi master.

What is the name of the creature that swallows Boba Fett

when he falls into the Pit of Carkoon?

The Mighty Sarlacc.

Denis Lawson plays which X-wing fighter pilot in all three original episodes?

Wedge Antilles.

What mistake by Admiral Ozzel alerts the Rebels to the Imperial threat

in time for them to raise an energy field?

He comes out of hyperspeed too quickly. Lightspeed.

Which possession does Luke sell in Mos Eisley

before leaving on the Millennium Falcon?

-BEEP His speeder.

-His landspeeder, yes. One pass.

Your character which you are so elegantly portraying tonight,

Leia, sarcastically offers, when it all breaks down...

-It's not a push-start, is it?

-Sort of, "Get out and push."

Nonetheless, OJ, you have 10 points.

APPLAUSE

Our next contender, please.

-Slightly more conventionally dressed. Your name is?

-Simon Calder.

-Your chosen charity?

-It's Farm-Africa.

-Your specialist subject?

-The history of Concorde.

One and a half minutes on Concorde coming up.

Concorde was jointly designed by the British Aircraft Corporation

and which French company, based in Toulouse?

Aerospatiale.

In which district of Bristol were the British-built Concordes assembled?

Filton.

On the 21st January, 1976,

the first commercial Concorde flights took off,

operated by British Airways and which other airline?

Air France.

Which TV presenter claims to have been Concorde's most frequent flier?

David Frost.

Who captained the first test flight

of a British-built Concorde on 9th April 1969?

Brian Trubshaw.

In 1985, Phil Collins appeared in which music event in London

before flying to America on Concorde for another concert

in Philadelphia later the same day?

Live Aid.

-What was the name of the jet engines that power Concorde?

-Olympus.

Which famous sporting trophy was brought back to Europe

on Concorde on 20th December 1995?

Pass.

Who was given an 85th birthday treat from BA with a flight

in Concorde and a visit to the cockpit on 6th August 1985?

The Queen Mother.

In 1993, which former hairdresser

became Concorde's first female pilot?

-Pass.

-How many Concords entered flying service?

-The other six were prototypes, production and early production models.

-14.

Which singer and noted environmental campaigner said of Concorde,

"I feel safer on Concorde than I do on the M3.

-"It's a huge gas-guzzling machine and yet it's beautiful."

-Sting.

For the first Concorde flights,

the Air France flight flew to Rio de Janeiro via Dakar.

-What was the destination of the British Airways flight?

-Bahrain.

Which government minister said the French 'e'

in Concorde's name stood for England and Entente Cordiale?

BEEP

He later added Ecosse after a complaint pointing out

part of it was made in Scotland?

At the time he was Anthony Wedgwood Benn, he is now Tony Benn.

Exactly, but you only get one point.

You have two passes.

The hairdresser who became a pilot was Barbara Harmer

and that famous trophy they brought back in '95 was the Ryder Cup. Simon, you have 12 points.

APPLAUSE

And our final contender, please.

-And your name is?

-Antony Costa.

-Your chosen charity?

-Sara's Hope Foundation.

-And your specialist subject?

Only Fools And Horses.

What's the name of the tower block

-on the estate in Peckham where the Trotters live?

-Nelson Mandela House.

Despite being told about his mistakes,

Trigger persists in calling Rodney what name?

-Dave.

-At which family event does Uncle Albert make

-his first appearance in the 1985 episode, Strained Relations?

-Pass.

In Heroes and Villains, Del and Rodney arrive at

a publican's funeral dressed as Batman and Robin.

What has Trigger come as?

Chauffer.

What working title did the writer John Sullivan originally use for the series?

Readies.

In The Miracle Of Peckham, Del claims to receive divine messages,

-but how is he actually able to predict when the statue in the church will weep?

-Pass.

Who performs the song Down To Margate over the credits

of The Jolly Boys' Outing?

John Sullivan had wanted them to record the theme tune

to the series but was persuaded to do it himself.

Chas and Dave.

-In A Losing Streak, Del wins the card game with what hand?

-Four aces.

When the Trotters are decorating Denzil's flat,

Del sends Granddad to buy a packet of Jaffa Cakes and?

-A budgie.

-A canary!

In Yesterday Never Comes,

the cabinet Del claims is a Queen Anne has lots of tiny holes in it.

What does Del initially say may have caused them?

The weather?

Not quite, maybe Queen Anne playing darts.

Trigger works as a road sweeper when he joins a dating agency,

what does he say his job is to add a bit of glamour?

-A bus conductor.

-Bus inspector, yeah.

While Del and Rodney are in Sotheby's

selling their watch for £6.2 million, their Reliant Regal

-is parked outside with what sign in the windscreen?

-BEEP

-Tax in post.

-Not exactly. Midwife on emergency call. You were very close.

Your other two passes.

In The Miracle Of Peckham, Del knew the statue was going to weep

because he'd heard the weather forecast.

-That family event at which Uncle Albert made his first appearance?

-Granddad's funeral.

Exactly, just a bit too late. Antony, you have seven points.

APPLAUSE

So, that's the end of the first round.

A pretty close one. Let's see the scores.

Fourth place, seven points, Antony Costa.

Third place, nine points, Jay Rayner.

Second place, ten points, OJ Borg.

In the lead with 12 points, Simon Calder.

APPLAUSE

The general knowledge round now.

If there's a tie at the end, the number of passes are taken

into account and the person with the fewer passes is the winner.

Let's get on with it and ask Antony to join us again, if he would.

I'm a bit puzzled by your illustrious career,

because Blue was very successful as a band.

Lots of number ones and all the rest of it.

You were doing brilliantly and then you all sat around and said,

"Let's go into the Eurovision Song Contest."

Why?

It was a great experience for us,

to represent the country and the UK but for us, it was more about

telling the people in Europe and around the world Blue are back.

The next day our song went to number two in Germany and number three in Sweden.

-It did well for us.

-I'd imagined you'd have gone, "Oh, God.

-"We came 11th and we're actually rather good."

-Yeah, we did all right.

Azerbaijan won!

-Azerbaijan won because...

-It was probably a better song.

It might have been, or it might have been politics.

A lot of people say that.

Once you're there, John,

it is a case of everyone voting for each other.

It's not all about the song.

We did really, really well, and we're just... Me personally,

we're pleased to be back.

Let's see how you do now. You've got seven points so far.

-Well, you know, that's not bad.

-It's not the worst, is it?

Oh no, no, no, no! Look, you're not even in that league.

You're doing well.

You've got to get a few more if you're going to win the trophy.

I know.

So here we go, two minutes this time on general knowledge.

Which big cats have a family unit known as a pride?

-Lions.

-Yes.

Who had a hit with Crazy In Love in 2003 - the song also featured the rapper Jay-Z?

Beyonce.

The sasquatch or Bigfoot is the North American equivalent

of which legendary creature in the Himalayas?

-Pass.

-Which docusoap starring Amy Childs and friends

picked up the YouTube audience BAFTA at the ceremony in May 2011?

-The Only Way Is Essex.

-Yes.

According to the title of the first book in Steig Larsson's Millennium trilogy,

Lisbeth Salander has a tattoo depicting what creature?

-Spider.

-Dragon.

Which Australian arts venue with a shell-like roof was constructed on the site

-of the former tram depot on Sydney Harbour?

-Pass.

Which England batsman was reinstated after he had been given out

in controversial circumstances in the second Test against India in July 2011?

Not... It's not Flintoff?

No. It is Ian Bell.

Which spirit forms the base of the liqueur Drambuie?

Pass.

Who became the first British artist to top the American charts since

Elton John when You're Beautiful reached number one in March 2006?

-James Blunt.

-Yes.

In the 1880s, Van Gogh produced

two series of still life works of which flower,

one showing them on the ground and the other in vases?

-Daffodil.

-Sunflower!

Which Canadian-born actor has starred

in the Truman Show, Liar Liar, the Cable Guy and Me, Myself And Irene?

-Mr Jim Carrey.

-It was.

What name for a wigwam made of skin stretched over

a frame of poles comes from the Sioux word meaning dwelling?

-Pass!

-Did you say pass?

-Yes.

-All right.

In which long-running musical are Mr Mistoffelees,

Macavity and Grizabella among the main characters?

-Cats.

-Yes. Which Scottish city

has a six-and-a-half mile underground railway

that opened in 1896 and is nicknamed the Clockwork Orange?

-Glasgow!

-Yes!

What name is given to the vulcanised rubber disc used

instead of a ball in ice hockey?

-Puck.

-Yes.

The abbreviation CCTV stands for what device used in surveillance?

BEEP Big Brother.

LAUGHTER

It might be, there was a clue in the initials.

-I know.

-Closed Circuit Television.

There we are. Four passes altogether.

Teepee is the name of that Native American tent.

Whisky forms the base for Drambuie.

Sydney Opera House.

And the Bigfoot,

otherwise known as the yeti or the abominable snowman.

-You've now got, Antony, 15 points.

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

And Jay Rayner again now, please.

I sort of feel I have to apologise for this first question

because you must be asked it a million times

but nonetheless, you go into a restaurant, they know who you are,

they either prepare the best possible meal for you or they spit in it.

I book under a pseudonym, they don't know I'm coming and I turn up.

So at that point they know I'm there.

There was a colleague of mine who once uttered a brilliant line,

he said, I've yet to find a bad restaurant that becomes a good one because I turn up.

And so, actually, I genuinely don't think there's that much they can do. They do try ruses.

A classic one is if you send the bill back because there is something wrong with it,

it'll be to get things taken off you didn't have,

with me, it is generally to get things put on I did have.

They leave things off the bill to try to...

They try to butter you up.

Try to make it look cheaper than it is.

Doesn't there come a point when you've got to say

I've become bigger than this job?

What are you saying?! I work out all the time!

I said bigger, not...you know.

Um, more prominent. And therefore you have to give it up.

There will be a time, but what I say it is about is my copy - the words that I write.

Every single piece of writing in the newspaper - the question is why should bother reading this?

And you have to provide a service for the readers or they will move

on to the gardening column which I know is on the next page.

All right, you do a grand job and you now have nine points in this contest.

Let's see how you do with general knowledge. Two minutes starting now.

In which sport do Europe & America compete for the Ryder Cup?

-Golf.

-Yes, who plays the New York detective John McClane in the Die Hard films?

Bruce Willis.

In which American state is Nashville,

the country's major centre for country and western music?

-Tennessee.

-Yes.

Four art galleries in England are now named after

which 19th-century sugar merchant,

he donated many paintings to the first gallery?

-Mr Tate.

-Yes. Actually, Sir Henry.

What type of entertainment do performers sing along with

backing tracks - "empty orchestra" in Japanese.

-Karaoke.

-Yes.

What's the nationality of Andre Villas-Boas,

who was appointed Chelsea's new manager in June 2011?

I have absolutely... Greek!

Portuguese.

The three pointed chalk stacks known as the Needles stand on

-the western tip of which of the British Isles?

-The Isle of Wight.

-Yes.

In Cajun cooking which spicy soup derives its name

from a Bantu word for okra which is used as the chief thickening agent?

-Jambalaya?

-Gumbo.

What name is given to the tablets set into the front of buildings

where notable people lived and worked that originated in London in 1866?

Uh, plaques, blue plaques.

Yes. Willie is the name of the red-bearded Scottish groundskeeper

who works in Springfield Elementary School in which long-running American series?

-The Simpsons.

-Yes.

Which country was Germany's principal ally in WWII

from 1939 until 1943 when it changed sides?

-Italy.

-Yes.

Who left MI6 to become a full-time writer after his novel

The Spy Who Came In From The Cold became a bestseller?

-John Le Carre.

-Yes.

At the Savoy hotel a wooden black cat called Kaspar sits at the table

if there are how many guests in the party?

Well, he's the 13th seat.

Yes, I'll let you have that. In a party of 13 he takes the 13th place.

What name is given to the women led by Emmeline Pankhurst

who campaigned for the vote in the early 20th century?

-The Suffragettes.

-Yes.

Whose first solo hit after a successful career singing

with her husband Ike was Let's Stay Together?

-Tina Turner.

-Yes.

Which large African animal comes from the Greek for river horse?

-Rhinoceros.

-Hippopotamus.

In 2000, which stand-up comedian and West Brom fan

starred in the West End play Cooking With Elvis?

-Frank Skinner?

-Yep.

BLEEP

Auction and contract are versions of which card game?

-Bridge.

-Is correct.

No passes, Jay, you have rocketed up to 24 points.

APPLAUSE

And now OJ Borg again, please.

I was going to ask you about something else, but, erm, explain,

-you're Princess Leia.

-I was wearing the bikini but your producer said it's a family show,

so I wasn't allowed.

-That was the right call.

-Probably was.

Yeah. But you don't normally go around like that

when you're not on telly doing the lottery?

No. It's a distraction.

I thought if this goes horribly wrong, and I shame myself,

at least people can laugh at the fact a man's wearing a dress and a wig.

They could. Oh, yes, the wig. I hadn't notice the wig -

I was so obsessed with the rest.

LAUGHTER Two Danish pastries I had with me.

Ha, ha! The National Lottery Show...

you can't buy a ticket?

No, they don't let us.

I think if we won, there'd be a temptation to go,

I've just won £15 million!

You'd probably drop your trousers and run around, going "look at me!"

-With you dropping your trousers, well...

-Which I've done.

You've done it for this show. Have you always wanted to be a presenter?

Yeah, I wanted to be an actor in the week, according to my mum,

or a presenter and own an ice cream van at the weekends.

Apparently that was my aim for years.

And what's your big ambition?

I'd love to present a game show like Mastermind. I just need you to...

-LAUGHTER

-Well, you know...

-I'd never be able to do it!

-Sorry, you'll have to change.

I don't know, maybe...

We don't know what's beneath that table, do we?

Well, you know, later!

Right, you have ten points.

At the moment, 24 is the score to beat.

Let's see if you can do that with your general knowledge, starting now.

The characters in which 1973 cult musical include Frank-N-Furter

and the sinister servant Riff Raff?

-The Rocky Horror Show.

-Yes.

What building in a French town or city is known as the hotel de ville?

-Pass.

-Which marine creatures get their name from

their gelatinous make-up and appearance? Some species have a powerful sting.

-Jellyfish.

-Yes.

Who wrote Fever Pitch, about a love of football and Arsenal?

Nick Hornby.

Yes. A variety of which staple food is used to make paella?

Rice.

Which resort on the North Cornish coast has become a top surfing venue -

-Fistral beach is particularly renowned?

-Newquay.

-Yes.

Aston Merrygold is a singer with which all-male pop group

who were runners-up on the X Factor and have gone on to have number one hits

that include Everybody In Love and She Makes Me Wanna?

JLS.

In English football, what is the division below the Premiership?

The Championship.

In a 2011 film based on the Marvel Comics stories, Steve Rogers

is turned into which super soldier in a top-secret research project?

-Captain America.

-Correct.

What object was an early form of time-keeping device?

A sundial.

Which Elizabethan explorer is often wrongly credited

with bringing tobacco from the New World?

-Sir Francis Drake.

-Sir Walter Raleigh.

Which comedian, who starred in Jonathan Creek,

regularly appears on the game show QI,

where his final score is often well into minus figures?

-Alan Davies.

-Yes.

Gate-leg and drop-leaf are both types of which item of furniture?

-Chest of drawers.

-Table.

What is the easternmost Canary Island -

famous for black sand beaches and its volcanic landscape?

-Fuerteventura.

-Lanzarote.

Which classic vampire novel is told through the writings

of Jonathan Harker and his fiancee, Mina, among others?

-Bram Stoker?

-Dracula.

In July 2011, The Feeling played which David Bowie song

in Trafalgar Square as the medals for the 2012 Olympics were unveiled?

Er...pass.

American and Chinese are the only species of which reptiles

that closely resemble crocodiles?

Alligators.

What colour wire should be connected to the live terminal

in a standard three-pin plug?

My girlfriend's going to kill me, is it blue?

-BEEP

-No, it's brown.

-Argh!

It's brown and you had two passes. The David Bowie song was Heroes.

And hotel de ville is town hall or city hall.

You didn't quite get there - 21 points.

Ohhhh! APPLAUSE

And Simon Calder again, please.

And...you've done a bit of travelling...

since you've been a travel writer.

The fact is, it doesn't matter what aeroplanes they produce,

travelling by air is a thoroughly miserable experience these days.

Well, if you draw a line around 1995 when the no-frills airlines started going,

that's when it stopped being glamorous and it started being affordable.

And my goodness me, Concorde, what a magnificent monumental folly.

Just as the Americans were saying we're going to build

lots of big planes like the 747 so that we can democratise air travel,

what were we doing with the French? We were building something to fly business people -

almost always business-MEN around at very high speed, completely unnecessary.

Although it was great to see OJ tonight cos I was reminded of what the stewardesses used to look like.

LAUGHTER

If you look at the load factor - the day they cancelled Concorde, back in April 2003,

BA Concorde from New York to London -

100 seats, only 20 occupied. It couldn't go on. The world has changed.

-It's a no-frills world now, John.

-Right! You've got 12 points, Simon.

24 is still the score to beat. Let's see if you can do it with your general knowledge. Here we go.

Brian May is the guitarist and a founder member of which famous rock group?

-Queen.

-Yes.

In which Roald Dahl story is Willy Wonka

assisted by knee-high helpers known as the Oompa Loompas?

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory?

Charlie And The Chocolate Factory.

Who married fellow barrister Cherie Booth on 29 March 1980?

-Tony Blair.

-Yes.

Which razor-toothed fish is found in the waters of South America?

Piranha.

Whose equation E=MC2 states that mass is a form of energy?

Einstein.

Yes, which English football club's home ground stadium is now called the Etihad,

which some have suggested is Arabic for united - the name of their rivals?

Tottenham Hotspur.

Manchester City!

Which Dorset-born English poet and novelist set most of his work in the fictional county of Wessex

which includes the places Overcombe and Casterbridge?

Thomas Hardy.

-How were Henry VIII's wives Anne Boleyn and Catherine Howard executed?

-Beheading.

On which Greek island are the resorts

of Agios Nikolaos and Elounda?

Crete.

The custom of standing for which chorus in Handel's Messiah

is often said to have begun when George II did so at a performance in London?

Hallelujah.

What is involved in the past-time of gurning,

particularly popular in Cumbria?

Pass.

Which former US vice president narrates the Oscar-winning documentary

An Inconvenient Truth about global warming?

Pass.

J Bruce Ismay, the chairman of the White Star Line

was vilified for many years

for jumping into a lifeboat when which ship hit an iceberg and sank?

Titanic.

What word that comes from the Latin "to stuff" describes a play

characterised by broad humour and an improbable plot?

Pass.

Which alcoholic beverage fermented from steamed rice is the national drink of Japan?

Sake.

Norman Fletcher reluctantly shares his prison cell

with Lennie Godber in which '70s sitcom?

Porridge.

What is the name of the flat-topped mountain that overlooks Cape Town?

Table Mountain.

For which form of art are Barbara Hepworth, Henry Moore and Antony Gormley renowned?

Sculpture.

What is the common name for the cushion filled with small plastic beads

that moulds itself into the shape of the user who sits on it?

I've got one at home... Pass.

Who topped the singles charts...

-BEEP

-for the second time in 1966 with Green Green Grass Of Home?

-Tom Jones.

-He did indeed,

Tom Jones. You have four passes altogether, Simon.

The practise of gurning is pulling ugly faces.

The former American vice president who narrates An Inconvenient Truth is Al Gore,

The word from the Latin "to stuff" is farce,

and what you've got at home is, as you know, a bean bag.

Four passes but 26 points.

APPLAUSE

Well, a good close round there. Let's have a look at the scores.

In 4th place with 15 points - Antony Costa.

Third place 21 points - OJ Borg.

Second place, 24 points - Jay Rayner,

but he was pipped at the post,

because in first place, with 26 points - Simon Calder.

APPLAUSE

Simon...

-There it is.

-Thank you very much indeed.

-Congratulations.

Thank you, see you in the cheap seats.

You can put it in your travel bag!

Well done to Simon, do join us again

for more Celebrity Mastermind. Goodnight.

You don't have to be a celebrity to appear on the show

so if you would like to appear on the next series of Mastermind on BBC Two

then do visit us online at bbc.co.uk/mastermind.

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Email [email protected]