Episode 7 Celebrity Mastermind

First in the spotlight tonight

is Laurence Rickard from Horrible Histories.

His specialist subject - the Indiana Jones films.

APPLAUSE

Next, a wildlife presenter, Martin Hughes-Games.

He will be answering questions on Evelyn Waugh.

APPLAUSE

The model Vogue Williams takes as her subject Kim Kardashian.

APPLAUSE

And the BBC's deputy political editor John Pienaar

on William Gladstone.

APPLAUSE

Hello, and welcome to Celebrity Mastermind with me,

John Humphrys, and four contenders

about to take a step into the unknown.

They may think they've mastered their specialist subjects,

but they can't possibly know how they will react to lights

and the clock and the black chair -

and, of course, the general knowledge questions.

Two minutes on that,

but first, 90 seconds on their specialist subjects.

So, let's ask our first contender to join us, please.

And your name is?

Your chosen charity?

Is the Cystic Fibrosis Trust.

And your chosen subject?

Is advanced astrophysics.

In 90 seconds, starting now. Who...?

What did you say?!

LAUGHTER

So nearly got away with that!

What if I'd asked you questions on advanced astrophysics?

Have you got some? I can give it a go.

I think we'd both come unstuck quite quickly.

I tell you what, we'll do something else a bit easier instead.

-All right, go on.

-Take your choice.

Um, let's try the Indiana Jones films.

-All right, we'll do Indiana Jones instead.

-OK.

Here we go, 90 seconds, starting now.

Who plays the young Indiana

in the opening sequences of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

where he tries to save the Cross of Coronado from treasure hunters?

-River Phoenix.

-Yep.

Who composed the music for all four Indiana Jones films?

-John Williams.

-Yeah.

What's the name of the secret place where the Ark of the Covenant

was kept in ancient Tanis?

It could only be found by holding the Staff of Ra

in the correct position in the map room.

-Well of Souls.

-Yeah.

What does Indy hide in to save himself from a nuclear test blast

in the Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull?

-A fridge.

-Yeah.

In Raiders of The Lost Ark,

what does one of Indy's students have written on her eyelids

when he is telling his class about the Neolithic barrow at Turkdean?

-"Love you".

-Yeah.

Which song does Willie Scott sing, mostly in Mandarin,

in the Obi Wan nightclub over the opening credits

of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom?

-Anything Goes.

-Yes.

Indy's hatred of what creatures is mentioned in all the films?

It possibly stems from when he fell into a box of them as a young man

on a circus train in the Last Crusade.

-Snakes.

-Yep.

What is served as the dessert

after dishes including snake surprise and eyeball soup

at the maharajah's banquet in The Temple of Doom?

-Chilled monkey brains.

-Yes - what else?!

-Delicious.

-What does Shorty use

to break Indy out of his "Black Sleep of Kali Ma" state

in The Temple of Doom?

He later does the same for the maharajah.

-A flaming torch.

-Yeah.

Who autographs the Grail Diary

after Indy and his father retrieve it from Elsa

in Berlin in The Last Crusade?

-Hitler.

-Yeah.

What is the name of the Russian colonel doctor

played by Cate Blanchett

in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull?

-Spalko.

-Yeah. BEEP

In The Last Crusade it is revealed that Indy's real name

is Henry Jones Junior.

Who or what does his father say originally had the name Indiana?

-The dog.

-The dog, the family dog.

It was indeed. No passes, and you have scored, Laurence -

I don't know if you would have done better with astrophysics -

but you've got 12 points.

APPLAUSE

And our next contender, please.

And your name is?

Your chosen charity?

And your chosen subject?

The great Evelyn Waugh in 90 seconds, starting now.

The hero of Waugh's first novel, Decline and Fall,

is a young man who is sent down from Oxford

after his trousers are stolen by members of the Bollinger Club.

What is his name?

-Paul Pennyfeather.

-Yes.

William Boot, the writer of the Lush Places nature column

is mistakenly sent to Ishmaelia as a war correspondent.

Which newspaper does he write for?

-The Beast.

-Yes - The Daily Beast.

What piece of household equipment

does Colonel Blount think Adam Sykes has come to demonstrate

when he first arrives at Doubting Hall?

-A hoover.

-Yeah, a vacuum cleaner.

Which of Waugh's novels, first published in 1953,

depicts a dystopian state

and is subtitled A Romance of the Near Future?

-Love Among The Ruins.

-Yeah.

What reason did Waugh give to John Freeman

for agreeing to be interviewed by him

on the BBC television programme Face To Face?

-Money.

-Yeah - poverty.

In Brideshead Revisited,

when Charles Ryder first sees Sebastian Flyte,

Flyte's holding a large teddy bear.

What is the bear called?

-Aloysius.

-Yes.

In Black Mischief, the Emperor Seth is overthrown

in a coup that takes place during a pageant.

What is the pageant promoting?

-Birth control.

-Yeah.

In 1944, Waugh was second-in-command to a British Army officer

on a diplomatic mission to Croatia,

during which they were both in a plane crash.

Who was the other officer?

Pass.

Major Ludovic goes to see a famous sword

on display in Westminster Abbey

and later writes a sonnet about it.

What is the name of the sword?

-Er, the Sword of Honour?

-Sword of Stalingrad.

What was the name of Waugh's history tutor at Oxford?

He used it for a series of foolish characters

in some of his early novels.

-Cruttwell.

-Yeah.

William Boot's sister mischievously inserted the name of a bird

instead of the word badger

throughout one of his nature columns.

BEEP Which bird?

-The grebe.

-Yes, the crested grebe.

You had one pass, Martin.

In 1944, Waugh was second-in-command to Randolph Churchill.

-Oh, of course he was!

-Mm.

You have scored nine points.

APPLAUSE

And our next contender, please.

And your name is?

Your chosen charity?

And your chosen subject?

In 90 seconds, here we go.

In May 2014, Kim Kardashian married Kanye West

at a 16th century fortress in which Italian city?

-Florence.

-Yeah.

What's the name of the fashion store,

branded as "a one stop contemporary women's boutique"...

-Dash.

-..that the Kardashian sisters opened

in Calabasas, California in 2006?

-Dash.

-Yeah.

For which magazine's Winter 2014 cover

was she photographed with a champagne glass

balanced on her bottom,

next to a tag line that said "Break The Internet"?

-Paper.

-Yeah.

What is the name of Kardashian and Kanye West's son,

who was born in December, 2015?

-December 5th - Saint.

-Yes.

Who designed the Givenchy floral gown

that she wore at the 2013 Met Gala?

It's been described as a "frumpy Mrs Doubtfire dress".

-Riccardo Tisci.

-Yeah.

Kardashian was robbed in a luxury guest apartment

on the 3rd of October, 2016 in which city?

-Paris.

-Yeah.

For which 2008 film was Kardashian nominated

for her first Golden Raspberry Award,

in the category of Worst Supporting Actress?

She lost to Paris Hilton.

Pass.

Some of her father's ancestors are from which country?

She visited there in April 2015 and met the Prime Minister.

-Armenia.

-Yeah. Before Kim Kardashian found fame

with Keeping Up With The Kardashians,

she briefly appeared in another reality series

that starred Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie.

What was it called?

-The Simple Life.

-Yes.

In May 2011, who proposed to her in her candle-lit bedroom,

with a message written in red rose petals

that said "will you marry me"?

-Kris Humphries.

-Yes.

Which long-term executive producer of Keeping Up With The Kardashians

hosted the programme's ten year anniversary special episode

in September 2017?

-Ryan Seacrest.

-Correct.

In March 2012, she was flour-bombed on the red carpet

at the London West Hollywood Hotel

during the launch event for which of her fragrances?

Um... Gold.

-True Reflection.

-True Reflection.

That's what it says here.

One pass, Vogue. That 2008 film for which she was nominated

for the Golden Raspberry Award - Disaster Movie.

-Yes.

-How appropriate.

-You have scored, Vogue, 10 points.

-Whoo!

-APPLAUSE

-Thank you!

And our final contender, please.

And your name is?

Your chosen charity?

And your chosen subject?

William Gladstone in 90 seconds, starting now.

Gladstone served four times as Prime Minister.

He was first elected to parliament in 1832,

aged only 22, as a Tory MP for which constituency?

-Newark.

-Yep.

Queen Victoria famously complained that during their audiences

Gladstone addressed her as though she was a...?

-Public meeting.

-Yes.

Who described Gladstone in April 1839

as "the rising hope of those stern and unbending Tories"?

-Thomas Macaulay.

-Yep.

In 1852, Gladstone became the Chancellor of the Exchequer

for the first time in a coalition government.

Who was the Prime Minister?

-Lord Aberdeen.

-He was.

What painful and debilitating skin infection

did Gladstone have an attack of in September 1853?

His daughter Agnes had also had the condition.

-Epysineas.

-Yes - erysipelas.

Gladstone resigned as the President of the Board of Trade in 1845

over his objections to a grant to which Irish Catholic Seminary?

-The Maynooth seminary.

-Yeah.

What government bill did Gladstone make 73 speeches against

in parliament in 1857?

Would you repeat the question?

What government bill did Gladstone make 73 speeches against

in parliament in 1857?

Pass.

Which radical reformer did Gladstone appoint

as the President of the Board of Trade

when he became Prime Minister for the first time in December 1868?

Oh...

-Chamberlain.

-John Bright.

When Gladstone left the Tories

and joined Lord Palmerston's Liberal government of 1859,

he supported Richard Cobden's proposal

for a free trade agreement with which country?

-France.

-Yes.

Which Irish Nationalist leader denounced Gladstone in 1881

as "this masquerading knight errant,

"this pretending champion of the rights of every nation

"except those of the Irish nation"?

-BEEP

-Charles Stewart Parnell.

It was indeed -

and that one you passed on, he made 73 speeches

against the Divorce and Matrimonial Causes Bill, it says here.

John, you got eight points.

APPLAUSE

Well, a very close first round -

let's have a look at all of those scores.

In fourth place, eight points, John.

Third place, nine points, Martin.

Second place, 10 points, Vogue.

First place, 12 points, Laurence.

APPLAUSE

So, it is the general knowledge round now,

and if there is tie at the end of it,

then the number of passes are taken into account,

and the person with fewer passes is the winner.

Let's get on with it, ask John to join us again, please...

..and, John, you've been a political correspondent,

now deputy editor, of course, for a very long time,

and I wonder how many times you've heard people say,

as everybody is saying now,

"God, we've never gone through a period like this before."

Yes, they're all saying it now. We haven't.

I've covered politics for 35 years,

and, at a certain point, two, three years ago,

you think you've more or less seen everything.

Now I'm seeing things I've never seen almost every week...

-Such as?

-..that passes.

The condition of the premiership, the condition of the government,

the condition of the opposition, the state of public opinion,

the next thing that's going to happen,

the amount that's at stake -

and more is at stake at this time in our politics, easily,

-than at any time since World War II.

-Because of Brexit?

Because of Brexit - also, something that's going on around the world,

of which Brexit may conceivably be a part -

but, in this country, we haven't seen anything like this,

and we really don't know where we are going.

Right, John. You've got eight points.

Plenty of time to catch up and overtake the field,

because you have two minutes of general knowledge, starting now.

In Doctor Who, which of the Doctor's adversaries

say "Exterminate" before doing just that to their enemies?

-The Daleks.

-Yeah. What battle of 1066

is depicted in the final existing sections of the Bayeux tapestry?

-Hastings.

-Yeah.

What mild, crumbly cheese, named after a northern county,

is one of the oldest in England?

It is normally whitish in colour,

but there is a red variety, coloured with annatto, and a blue variety.

Um... Pass.

Who won her third Best Actress Oscar

for her role as Queen Eleanor of Aquitaine

in the 1968 film The Lion in Winter?

-Katharine Hepburn.

-Yes.

Which town in the centre of Australia

is named after a nearby waterhole,

that was itself named for the wife of a government official?

-Alice.

-Yes, Alice Springs.

What instrument for listening to sounds in the chest cavity

did the French doctor Rene Laennec invent in about 1816

because putting an ear to somebody's chest caused him embarrassment?

-Stethoscope.

-Yeah.

In Tennyson's poem In Memoriam AHH,

what follows the line "Tis better to have loved and lost"?

-"Than never to have loved at all".

-Yes.

With which chart-topping song

did Brotherhood of Man win the 1976 Eurovision Song Contest?

-Save Your Kisses For Me.

-Yes.

What is the minimum age for a juror in a British court?

-18.

-Yes.

The Turner Prize winning British artist Chris Ofili

has used the dried dung of a large mammal in many of his works.

What mammal?

-Cow.

-Elephant.

The old part of which American city

is known as the French Quarter or the Vieux Carre?

-New Orleans.

-Yes.

What was the name of the daredevil Blue Peter presenter

whose constant companion on the programme from '71

was his Border collie Shep?

-John Noakes.

-Yeah.

What small variety of chicken

gives its name to a very light weight in boxing?

-Bantamweight.

-Yes.

In which Italian city

does Donna Leon set her series of detective novels

featuring Commissario Brunetti?

-Naples.

-Venice.

In the lyrics of a song, an iconic American highway runs

"from Chicago to LA, more than 2,000 miles all the way".

Which highway?

-Highway 66.

-Yes, Route 66.

Which tennis player became the youngest woman

to be ranked world number one in 1997?

She partnered Jamie Murray to win mixed doubles titles

at Wimbledon and the US Open in 2017.

-Pass.

-Martina Hingis. BEEP

The Singapura is the smallest recognised overall breed

of which domestic animal?

A cat.

-What?

-Cat?

-Cat! Is right, yeah, yeah.

Look confident, John, as if you knew it all along.

Cat is absolutely right.

Your passes - Martina Hingis was the tennis player who did so well,

and that mild, crumbly cheese is Cheshire.

You have scored, however, John, a total of 21 points.

APPLAUSE

And now Martin again, please.

Before you even sit down, I have to ask you about that wonderful jacket.

Or tunic - what do you call it?

-It's a sherwani.

-Oh!

-It's a sherwani.

I got married in it. It's a traditional Indian dress.

-It's beautiful.

-It's rather nice, isn't it?

I thought I'd give it outing - special occasion, special coat.

Right, let's talk about nature,

and the contrast between your programme and, say, Blue Planet.

We always call our programme a show, rather than a documentary,

so we try to be entertaining as well, and it's very different,

because, of course, it's live -

there's no script, there's no autocue,

we can pretty much say what we want - and Chris often does.

LAUGHTER Yes.

I should say, of course, it is called Springwatch,

and you also have all the other seasons...watching.

Which season is best to watch, from your point of view?

It's got to be Springwatch, because it's taken ten years

to get this good at putting cameras on the little birds' nests.

There's real drama in those nests.

Martin, 21 is now the score to beat,

let's see how you will do in your general knowledge.

Here we go.

What type of shoes gave Elvis Presley

his second British chart entry in 1956?

-Blue suede shoes.

-Yes.

Which French scientist gives his name

to the heat treatment of liquids such as milk

so that harmful organisms are destroyed

without altering the flavour and nutritional value?

-Pasteur.

-Yeah.

The Welsh speciality laverbread

is prepared from a variety of what marine plant?

-Seaweed.

-Yep.

Which English dramatist's works include

How The Other Half Loves and The Norman Conquests?

Pass.

Which spa town in Kent was granted the "Royal" prefix

by Edward VII in 1909

in recognition of its many past royal visitors?

-Tunbridge Wells.

-Yes.

For what 2016 film,

set in the Pacific during the Second World War,

did Mel Gibson receive a Best Director nomination?

-Pearl Harbor.

-Hacksaw Ridge.

What name was coined by Paracelsus

for a tincture of opium

that became popular in the 19th century

for medicinal and recreational purposes?

Pass.

Which group had their first number one hit single

with Heart Of Glass in 1979?

Pass!

The last episode of a school drama created by Phil Redmond

was televised in September 2008,

some 30 years after the first episode.

Which school drama?

-Hollyoaks.

-Grange Hill.

In which northern Indian city is the Taj Mahal mausoleum?

Er...

It's all gone out my head now! I've been there!

-Agra.

-Yes!

On which ship did the first Pilgrim Fathers

successfully set out from Plymouth in September 1620

on their way to the New World?

-The Mayflower.

-Yes.

What French term is used for the ornamental style of art

that flourished in Europe and America

in the 1890s and early 1900s?

Er...

Pass.

Which Surrey golf course has hosted the European Tour flagship event

the PGA Championship since 1984?

Pass!

Which Conservative MP and Father of the House

known for his love of cricket, Nottingham Forest and jazz

released the book Kind of Blue: A Political Memoir in 2016?

BEEP I can tell you -

look, I'll save you from yourself,

because you're out of time.

-Once you start that passing, it can...

-It does, doesn't it?

-It's horrendous.

-It is strange, how it happens like that.

-Anyway, Ken Clarke.

-Ken Clarke, of course it was.

Of course you knew that.

-Wentworth is the Surrey golf course.

-Yes, knew that, as well.

-Art Nouveau.

-Art Nouveau, yeah.

-The French term.

-You knew that, as well.

-Yes.

-Blondie was the group.

-Don't know whether you knew that.

-Oh, yes, of course it was.

-Blondie.

-Laudanum, that tincture of opium...

-I knew that, as well.

..and Alan Ayckbourn was the English dramatist

whose works included How the Other Half Loves and so on.

So, there you go. You could have got all of those,

and had it not been for the black chair, etc, you probably would have.

-As it is, Martin, you have a total of 15 points.

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

Now, Vogue, again, please.

You chose Kim Kardashian as your subject.

I do realise how ridiculous that seems.

Well, you sort of almost answered my first question, in a way,

because my first question was going to be, what is it about her...

-I just think...

-..that we're all so fascinated by?

..she's just incredible. She...

People might call her talentless, or whatever,

but she has a talent for business.

She is able to keep people interested in a reality show

going on a decade now, and everyone loves that kind of thing.

And doing nothing, really.

-I just think that they're quite a normal family. I mean...

-Normal?!

Well, like... Normal in a way...

The way they interact with each other, everything like that -

nothing, obviously, about their life is normal,

but the way the act with each other

would remind me of, like, me and my sisters.

Even her bum is interesting,

I mean, it's like, "How is your bum like that?!"

Why is...? Like, I'm fascinated by everything about her.

Well, you did very well with her, you got ten, you got ten points.

So 21 still the score to beat.

-Let's see how we do.

-Ooh!

-Here we go.

In English pantomime,

what name is given to the leading comic female role,

traditionally played by a man?

Pass.

The 2017 biographical drama Babs

featured Samantha Spiro and Jaime Winstone

as an older and a younger version of a comedy actress.

Which actress?

Ooh, it's the girl from EastEnders...

I forget her name - pass.

-OK.

-Barbara Windsor! Damn!

-Too late.

Which is the most southerly of the mainland states

of the United States of America?

What? I didn't hear what you said.

Which is the most southerly of the mainland states

of the United States of America?

Er, Pass.

With which song did Eric Prydz top the UK singles charts

for five weeks in 2004?

Mm... Pass.

What is the name of Bob Cratchit's sickly son

in Dickens' Christmas Carol?

Scrooge changes his ways after he sees the child's death in a dream.

Pass.

What region of the Outer Hebrides,

often thought of as a separate island,

is famous for the tweed traditionally made there?

-Arran.

-Harris.

Which actor, best known for his film portrayal of a boy wizard,

played Rosencrantz in a 2017 London production

of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead?

-Daniel Radcliffe.

-Yes.

-Yes!

Master James of Saint George designed many buildings for Edward I

that are still standing in North Wales. What are those buildings?

Not a clue, pass.

What alteration to clocks, abbreviated to BST,

was introduced in 1916?

-GST?

-British Summer Time.

The rediscovered wreck of a liner that sank in 1912

was explored in 1986 by a submarine called Alvin

and a robot called Jason Junior. Which liner?

-Pass!

-In which city was Adrian Mole living

when he wrote his first diary at the age of 13 and three quarters?

-Dublin.

-Leicester.

What name that came into use in the 18th century

is given to the Scottish broth of chicken and leeks?

Chicken... Pass.

What is the common name for either of the triangular bones

known as the scapula... BEEP

..in the upper part of the human body?

-Collar bone.

-The shoulder blade.

-Yeah, right, well, you had a few passes there.

-Just a few!

Quite a few.

Cock-a-leekie is the name of that Scottish broth,

-the Titanic was the ship...

-Oh, that's desperate!

-Yeah, I know.

Edward I built lots of castles, Tiny Tim was Bob Cratchit's son,

Call On Me was Eric Prydz's song,

Florida is the most southerly state of America

and in English pantomime, it's the dame.

-You know, the...

-No, I didn't know that.

-..the man who plays the...

Well, you're not English, are you?

Yeah, you asked me loads of English questions, that's what happened.

LAUGHTER I knew there was a reason for it.

Anyway, look, you're in double figures, so there you go.

-Thankfully.

-11 points.

-Thank you!

APPLAUSE

And finally, Laurence again, please...

..and Horrible Histories has been going for eight years on the telly.

-A lot longer in books.

-Yes. I think over 20 years, now, in books.

What's the balance between making them laugh and helping them learn?

It was very tricky initially, when the show was being developed,

finding that balance, cos it's very easy to make a punch line -

normally, the punch line of a joke is the ridiculous thing at the end,

but, if we make something up,

then kids grow up knowing the wrong facts,

so we had to find a brand of humour

that was very funny, hopefully, for a family audience,

but which didn't lie at the end.

And teachers like it, do they?

There are a few who kind of go,

"Well, you're just teaching kids about the stuff with poo,"

and you go, "Well, yeah," but if we give them the silly bits,

and we give them the bits with all the gore in,

and then, if that develops an interest in the subject,

they read around, and find the broader context.

And great fun, the stories.

Anyway, you have 12 points. Here we go, two minutes.

What's the name of the prehistoric stone circle monument

that stands on Salisbury Plain and is visible from the A303?

-Stonehenge.

-Yeah.

What name of Spanish origin

is given to the violent tropical cyclones

that occur especially in the Caribbean and western Atlantic?

-Hurricanes.

-Yeah.

The Humber Bridge, the Verrazano-Narrows

and the Golden Gate are all a particular type of bridge.

What type?

-Suspension.

-Yeah.

Watching The Wheels, published in 2016,

is the autobiography of a British former world motor racing champion

whose father Graham also won the title. Who is he?

-Damon Hill.

-Yeah. Which breed of short-legged dog

whose name means "badger hound" in German

was originally bred to pursue badgers into their burrows?

-Dachshund.

-Yeah.

What nickname was shared by the jazz pianist and composer

Thomas Wright Waller and the rhythm and blues singer Antoine Domino?

-Fats.

-Yeah.

Which actress plays the human rights lawyer Emma Banville

in the 2017 British crime thriller television drama Fearless?

Pass.

Chou-fleur is the French word

for a variety of the cabbage plant family,

usually served cooked. What's it called?

-Cauliflower.

-Yeah.

Who was elected South Africa's President in 1994,

after the country held its first elections

in which all races were allowed to vote?

-Nelson Mandela.

-Yes.

The Bulgarian holiday resorts of Burgas and Varna

lie on the coast of which large inland sea?

-Aegean?

-The Black Sea.

Which Shakespeare play that features two sets of twins

was the inspiration for the stage musical The Boys From Syracuse?

Oh... Pass.

What name is given to an open square in an Italian town or city?

-Piazza.

-Yes.

Frederick William Pomeroy's gilt-bronze statue of Justice

stands on top of a London court building. Which building?

-The Old Bailey.

-Yes.

In which American city in Utah

are the headquarters of the Mormon religion?

Um...

Pass.

Whose major achievements, before she turned to marathon running,

include a silver medal in the Women's 10,000 metres

at the 1999 World Athletics Championships?

-Paula Radcliffe.

-Yeah.

Which British writer, actor and comedian

made his directorial debut in 2003

with a screen version of Evelyn Waugh's novel Vile Bodies...

BEEP ..called Bright Young Things?

-Pass.

-I shall tell you, because you are out of time -

-Stephen Fry.

-Oh, of course!

-Yes.

And the other passes -

that city that's the headquarters of the Mormon religion,

-Salt Lake City.

-Salt Lake City.

-Yeah. Salt Lake City.

The Comedy Of Errors was the Shakespeare play,

and Helen McCrory played Emma Banville.

You have scored, Laurence, 23 points.

APPLAUSE

Well, it stayed very close. Let's have a look at all of the scores.

In fourth place, 11 points, Vogue.

Third place, 15 points, Martin.

Second place, 21 points, John.

First place, 23 points, Laurence.

APPLAUSE

-Congratulations.

-Thank you very much.

-I don't know...

-That's brill.

I don't know whether it has any historic value -

you might be able to talk about it one day.

It will do in time. I'll bury it in the garden,

and make sure somebody digs it up

-in a couple of hundred years.

-Well done.

-Thank you very much.

And you don't have to be a celebrity to take part

in the regular Mastermind programme.

If you'd like to appear in the next series on BBC Two,

then do visit us online at...

..and you can follow us on Twitter at...

Either way, do join us again next time from more Mastermind.

Thanks for watching. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE