Christmas Special Len Goodman's Partners in Rhyme

LEN RAPPING:

# Poems, sonnets limericks, verses

# Rhymes in love and rhymes in curses

# ..let's get on with the show. #

APPLAUSE

Hello and welcome to a festive Partners In Rhyme.

At this time of the year, there's nothing I like better

than roasting me chestnuts and pickling me walnuts.

Ooh, Auntie!

This show is all about spotting rhymes.

So while you're waiting for the snow, why don't you give it a go?

-AUDIENCE:

-Santa Claus with paws.

Ooh, you're an intelligent group. As soon as I saw you...

It's Santa Claus with paws.

He needed them seeing to on the National Elf Service.

AUDIENCE GROANS

If you've got the time...

..let's spot the rhyme!

Oh-ho!

Tonight, two contestants will be playing the game

with their own little helpers - our celebrity teams.

He cooks up a storm, she sings like a dream,

Ainsley Harriott and Kimberley Walsh, that's our first team.

APPLAUSE

And by day, they learn lines, but tonight, they make rhymes.

It's actress Michelle Collins and Tyger Drew-Honey.

APPLAUSE

Merry Christmas.

Welcome to the show.

And you can't have a game show without contestants,

so here are Victoria and Tyler.

APPLAUSE

Victoria.

-You look great, Victoria.

-Thank you.

What do you do and where do you come from?

I'm a school English teacher from County Down, Northern Ireland.

Oh, lovely jubbly.

I believe you've got a unique, festive talent.

-I have.

-What is it?

I can sing a Jingle Bells backwards.

-AUDIENCE:

-Ooh!

-Give it a go.

-OK.

# Ho, elginj slleb, elginj slleb

# Elgnij lla eht yaw

# Ho, tahw nuf ti si ot edir

# Ni a eno-esroh nepo hgiels, ho

Everybody! # Elginj slleb, elginj slleb

That's good, innit?

APPLAUSE

I can sing Ding-Dong, Merrily On High backwards. Want to see it?

Yeah.

# Ding-Dong, merrily on high... #

-Are you competitive?

-Yes!

-Ooh, Tyler, you'd better watch out.

-Here, nice to meet you.

-And you.

-How are you?

-Good.

-What do you do?

-I'm a project analyst.

-Oh, good.

Yeah, don't know what that is, but it sounds good.

Where do you live?

I live in Seaford, on the south coast, East Sussex.

Here, mountain climbing, you do that, don't you?

-Yeah, I've rock climbed for a good 16 years.

-Are you mad?

It's a personal challenge, yeah.

You better yourself by doing it, some people might say.

Well, you don't if you fall off.

There is one incident that sticks in my mind.

I spent three hours at the top of a climb

because I dropped the rope.

-Oh, no!

-Luckily, I had three people with me.

I had to wait for them to come down and then climb back up with

the rope, pass me the rope, them come down, then I could get down.

So those of you who want to take up climbing,

-probably don't come with me.

-All right!

Tonight, one of you could win a fantastic festive present -

a trip to the land of Northern Lights,

snow-covered sites and magical nights.

So, very best of luck, Victoria and Tyler, everyone.

APPLAUSE

Victoria and Tyler are each about to be paired up with

one of our celebrity rhyming teams.

But to help them choose the best team,

they need to see them in action.

I'm going to give you four rhymes to solve.

Buzz in if you know the answer.

There are no points at stake, it's just a chance to show who's

the perky turkey and who's nothing but stuffing.

-ALL, NERVOUSLY:

-Ooh!

First one...

-AUDIENCE:

-Aw!

BELL Tyger and Michelle?

Dog eating chocolate log.

Correct! Well done!

OK, next one.

BELL Tyger and Michelle?

-Hermione Granger in a manger.

-Correctamundo!

OK, next one.

BELL Kimberley and Ainsley?

Is it flies on the mince pies?

Yes, it is! Exactly that.

-Here we go.

-It's just a buzzing problem now.

Ooh, who's that?!

BELL Michelle and Tyger?

-Ainsley Harriott riding a chariot?

-Correct.

-Ainsley...?

-I didn't know what was happening!

I've never been on a chariot, Len!

-No, but you should have got the name.

-I know!

I could've got 50% right, yeah.

Yeah, you could've got Ainsley!

So, we've put our celebrities to the test,

but now it's Victoria and Tyler's turn.

It's time for...

This is a quickfire round. There's a point for each correct answer.

Whoever guesses the most rhymes within the time

gets first pick at the teams.

If you think you know, give it a go.

On your buzzers, find the rhyme.

BELL Yes, Tyler?

Elf on a shelf?

Elf on a shelf, lovely.

There we go, next one.

BELL Ooh, it's Tyler again.

-Will.I.am cutting a ham.

-Correct.

Come on, Victoria.

BELL Ooh, that was you, Victoria.

Eddie the Eagle with a beagle.

Correct, well done.

OK, moving on.

BELL Yes, Tyler?

-Is it Stephen Fry eating a mince pie?

-Correct!

Here's the next one...

BELL Yes, Tyler again?

Elton John feeding a swan.

You're good, you are. Come on, Victoria! Next one.

BELL Yes, Tyler?

Is it a bling king?

It is a bling king!

Here we go, next one...

SMOKE ALARM

SOBBING

BELL Yes, Victoria?

Justin Timberlake burned the cake?

Correct, well done!

Here we go...

BELL Yes, Tyler?

-A shark in an amusement park?

-Correct.

Moving on.

BELL Tyler?

Katy Perry drinking sherry.

Yes, well done.

There we go.

BELL Tyler?

A mermaid in an arcade.

Correct!

BUZZER

Out of time, well done.

So, who's choosing the crackers and who's stuck with the slackers?

It's time for the scores.

Victoria, you've got two. Well done.

Tyler, you've got eight.

APPLAUSE

Which means Tyler will get first pick of the teams.

OK, who will be partners in rhyme tonight?

Is it Kimberley and Ainsley or Michelle and Tyger?

Solely cos of name, think I'm going to go with Tyger and Michelle.

It's Tyler and Tyger, just to really mess me up?

Well, same team.

Which means, Victoria, you'll be with Ainsley and Kimberley.

It's team-up time with your Christmas partners in rhyme.

APPLAUSE

-So, you're happy with your team, Tyler, obviously?

-They both act,

-they should be good at this, right?

-Right, yeah.

-Day job.

-Yeah. You're feeling good then?

Very good, yeah.

-At the moment, yeah.

-LAUGHTER

What about you, Victoria?

I suppose you'd have picked Kimberley and Ainsley, wouldn't you?

Yeah, I'm a big Girls Aloud fan.

She's very like myself.

You look great together.

And Ainsley's got all the energy for this next round.

-Now, Ainsley.

-Yes, Len.

Give us a tip for doing your Christmas dinner?

Quite often, you haven't got that much room in the oven,

so you need to prepare things

so you can fit it all in at the right time, you know what I mean?

If all goes wrong, Len, you can always call me.

Would you come round?

Oh, I'd come round. I could keep your turkey nice and juicy, Len,

just the way you like it.

It's all about the basting, Len, get up.

-AUDIENCE:

-Ooh!

-Oh, look at him go!

Lovely.

Well, good luck to all of you. Well done.

APPLAUSE

OK, now we've got our teams,

we'll reset the scores to zero as we play...

Yes, it's Mime The Rhyme, or - since it's Christmas -

Pantomime The Rhyme!

In this round, the clues are all about famous people

doing something that rhymes with their name.

In this round, Michelle will describe the celebrity,

Tyger must mime the action.

You've got five clues and 30 seconds for each one.

Let's play Mime The Rhyme.

APPLAUSE

OK, she's our current Prime Minister.

Theresa May.

Erm, Theresa May...

-Bobsleigh!

-Yes!

-Hey!

Let's have a look.

Theresa May on a bobsleigh.

Well done.

OK, next one, here we go.

OK, there's two of them, they're in a pantomime, Cinderella,

they're men dressed as women.

-There's two of them...

-The Ugly Sisters?

-Yes.

-With blisters.

-Yes!

Let's have a look.

The Ugly Sisters with blisters.

Well done.

OK, here we go, next one.

OK, he used to be...

He's a TV presenter, used to be in Towie,

very handsome, always tanned...

-Mark Wright?

-Yes.

-Mark Wright having a snowball fight.

-Yes!

Let's have a look.

There you go.

-There's Mark Wright...

-He's buffer than that now.

..having a snowball fight. Well done.

-Moving on.

-Oh, OK. She's a TV presenter on morning TV,

she's from Scotland, her name is the name of the programme.

-Oh, Lorraine Kelly?

-Yes.

Lorraine Kelly...

Wading through jelly?

-Lorraine Kelly... Stuck...?

-No, no.

-Lorraine Kelly...

-BUZZER

-Aw.

-Oh, I didn't do it justice!

-Was I close?

-Lorraine Kelly has lost her welly.

-Oh, yeah, OK.

-Moving on, here we go.

Oh, OK.

He's French or Belgian. Used to be a kick boxer,

now he's an actor.

Very handsome, he does beer commercials on TV...

-Jean-Claude Van Damme.

-Yes.

Erm...

-Jean-Claude Van Damme building a snowman.

-Yes!

Let's have a look.

Jean-Claude Van Damme building a snowman. Well done!

That's time up, well done, please rejoin your team.

Well done, Tyler!

APPLAUSE

Victoria, your turn now.

Can you and Ainsley please come and join me?

APPLAUSE

Oh, yes.

Kimberley, you will be describing the famous person,

Ainsley, you're going to do the miming action. OK.

You have five clues and 30 seconds for each one.

Remember, Christmas time means some Christmas mimes.

OK, let's play Mime The Rhyme.

OK, she's the most famous panto dame ever, I think.

She plays Aladdin's mum in the launderette...

-Widow Twankey?

-Yes.

Crying into a hanky?

Wiping tears with a hanky?

-Lost her hanky?

-Lost her hanky!

Let's have a look.

Well done, that was hard.

Widow Twankey has lost her hanky.

Moving on.

OK, he's... Well, it's the most famous ape in a movie, ever.

-Hangs off the Empire State Building...?

-King Kong.

-Yes!

King Kong.

-Playing ping-pong.

-Yes!

Let's have a look.

There you go, well done.

Show us that ping-pong action.

-That was good.

-Oh, the ping-pong action?

-Yes.

Look, he's got the style of it.

Let me come this side and we'll have a match.

-Come on then, Len.

-Still dancing.

APPLAUSE

OK, moving on, here we go.

OK, he's one of the Top Gear team,

he's got long hair...

-James May.

-Yes!

James May...eating an array?

James May...at a buffet?

Yes!

Let's have a look.

James May at a buffet.

Ainsley, what do you think of a buffet? Do you like...?

I don't know, I don't like the food hanging around for too long.

If you get there nice and early, so if it opens at 12, get there at 12.

If you get there at two or three, then it's vwoop, vwoop, vwoop.

What's that, "Vwoop, vwoop, vwoop"?

Well, don't go into that. I don't like the thought of it.

Next one.

Now, come on, you're on a roll here.

OK, she's a pop star.

Her name is a colour,

-a colour that little girls love...

-Pink?

-Yes!

-Pink...?

-On an ice rink.

-Yes!

Oh, yes, please, let's have a look.

Pink at an ice rink. Well done.

OK, here we go.

Ah, this is a hard one.

OK, he's a grumpy comedian...

-And I can't think of anything else!

-Oh, Jack Dee?

-Yes!

-Yes!

-In a tepee?

-No.

-Erm...

Jack Dee...

-Decorating the Christmas tree!

-Yes!

Oh, let's have a look!

Jack Dee...

..decorating a tree.

This is a magical moment, Victoria, you've got all five correct.

APPLAUSE

Well, that's brilliant. Well done.

Please, rejoin your team.

Didn't she do well, everyone?

Thank you!

So, after that Mime The Rhyme, let's have a look at the scores.

Tyler, you've got four.

Victoria, you've got five.

Full house, well done!

Thank you!

It's all still to play for as we go into round three.

Oh, yes!

I'm about to show you a short film.

Hidden in the film are six pairs of rhymes to find.

If you spot the rhymes, please write them down.

There's a point for each correct pair.

Today, since it's Christmas, we're visiting our fairy godmother.

Or, rather, our lairy godmother, Lesley Joseph.

Once upon a time, there was a gorgeous fairy godmother

Who, when she didn't have panto to do

Always made the wishes of others come true.

Ah, yes, Cinderella - tall, handsome and independently wealthy.

Got it!

But then, one Christmas, she had an epiphany...

It's all about me!

So instead of making her friend's dreams come true

Her magical help, she promptly withdrew.

MUSIC: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper

Another wish from Snow White,

fourth one this week.

No, Cinderella, I have no idea why your feet smell so bad.

No wonder you can't get a man.

DOORBELL

Yes?

It's the noise, it's driving me nuts.

It's the music, it goes on and on...

MAGICAL CHIME

CROAKING

FAIRY GIGGLES

Oops!

But what this fairy godmother wanted the most

was her very own Prince Charming.

So she made a meal that was truly five-star

Even though my cooking is strictly below par.

That's better.

And to find herself in romantic heaven

This fairy's dream date was 007.

Abracadabra, trouble and strife

Make my dream husband come to life.

Hello, Miss Moneypenny.

I'm better off with the frog!

So, deciding she'd be good and grant wishes again

It was time to say...

Merry Christmas, everyone,

Especially to Len!

Mwah!

APPLAUSE

Worst fairy godmother ever!

-AUDIENCE:

-Oh, no, she isn't!

Oh, yes, she is!

Oh, no, she isn't!

Don't start, OK?

How many did you get at home?

Let's see it you were right.

Victoria got that. Tyler, did you get that?

-No, we didn't get it officially.

-Not officially.

-OK, no excuses.

Next one.

Tyler got that. And Victoria got that, well done.

Next one.

Yes, Tyler? And Victoria, well done.

Moving on.

Both got it, well done.

Here we go.

-Yep, we got that.

-Yep! Yep?

-Dodgy taste, though, innit?

-Ainsley, would you cook your toast like that?

-No!

-No!

Here we go, next one.

Tyler's there. Victoria? Well done.

That was a high-scoring round indeed.

So, Tyler scored five,

which gives him an overall total of nine.

Well done.

Victoria, you scored six,

your overall total, 11!

APPLAUSE

But there are more points to be won before the next round is done.

Whoever is in the lead after this round will go on to tackle

the endgame and set their sights on the Northern Lights.

-AUDIENCE:

-Ooh!

MUSIC: Wonderful Christmastime by Paul McCartney

Ha-ha!

Look at this!

It's time for...

BONG

Good evening, I'm Len Goodman,

and this is a special, festive edition of News At Len.

BONG

I have four news stories

and you must work out the rhyming headline that goes with them.

Listen carefully, but don't buzz in until I ask for your headline.

There are two points for each correct answer.

It's time for tonight's news.

First up, literary news.

BONG

The antihero of Charles Dickens's A Christmas Carol

has given up being a miser and taken to the Winter Olympics.

He's come first in an event in which the rider lies flat on a sledge

and hurtles down a frozen course.

What's the headline?

BELL

-Tyler?

-Scrooge on a luge?

Let's have a look.

It's, "Scrooge has won the luge."

When it comes to the freezer, Ebenezer's the geezer.

Next up, North Pole news.

BONG

Whilst waiting for Christmas Eve,

Santa's red-nosed reindeer is learning to play an outdoor sport.

"I like the North Pole, but I love the 18th hole," he said.

"But getting my hooves around a putter is still tricky."

What's the headline?

BELL Tyler?

Rudolf playing golf.

Let's have a look.

It's, "Rudolf has taken up golf."

Next up, music news.

BONG

An American singer-songwriter has had to cancel a date

on her worldwide tour.

The pop star's manager said,

"She and her squad have become bogged down in wintry weather

"conditions and it's unlikely that she would be able to shake it off."

What's the headline?

BELL Oh, here we go, Victoria?

Taylor Swift caught in a snowdrift.

Let's have a look.

Well done, that's good.

Taylor Swift is caught in a snowdrift.

She says she's never, ever, ever going back to that weather.

LAUGHTER

And finally, nature news.

BONG

A family of birds, often seen on Christmas cards

with brightly coloured chests, have had enough of the parky weather

we get this time of year.

So they've covered their feathers with sleeveless garments

usually won by men under their shirts.

What's the headline?

BELL Tyler?

Oh...

-No, it's gone.

-Throwing it over to you, Victoria?

Robin redbreast wearing a vest?

Let's have a look. Well done!

It's a robin redbreast wearing a vest.

They sent that story via Tweet.

LAUGHTER

And that's all the ho-ho-ho headlines for News At Len.

APPLAUSE

It's time to find out who's through to the final round.

Who's getting a ding-dong, merrily on high,

and who's getting a ding-dong, sadly goodbye?

OK, Tyler, you've got a commendable 13.

APPLAUSE

Victoria, you've got 15!

APPLAUSE

Which means setting their sights on the Northern Lights is Victoria.

Well, Tyler, although you just missed it,

you're still on my Christmas list.

And no-one leaves here without a gift,

because you're taking home your very own festive...

..pen from Len!

APPLAUSE

-Thank you.

-It's better than the Northern Lights.

-Yeah, I'll use that every day.

-Let me just put it there.

And it's got a little Christmas jacket.

And that is totally detachable, if you use a pair of scissors.

Now, it's like the Terracotta Army -

every one has got a slightly different Len Goodman face.

And you've got a particularly handsome one. Lovely jubbly.

A suntanned one.

Hey, everyone, let's thank Tyler and his partners in rhyme. Well done.

APPLAUSE

Victoria, congratulations on making it through to our final round.

Come and join me in the middle for the final riddle.

APPLAUSE

Hey-hey, Victoria!

Well done.

Well, your partners have taken you this far,

-but here's where you have to go it alone.

-OK.

If you can Rhyme Against Time,

you'll be seeing the delights of the Northern Lights.

Aw, look at me, all snuggly!

LAUGHTER

On the screen, you'll see a clock split into six segments.

Each segment contains a three-part rhyme,

like a pheasant being pleasant with a present.

You must solve all six segments to win the holiday.

If you get stuck, you can move on,

but you must complete all six in the time.

Six on the board, you're going abroad.

-Are you ready?

-Yes!

Let's play Rhyme Against Time. Whoa-ho!

Good luck, good luck!

Come on, Victoria!

Here we go.

Cat in a hat.

With a cricket bat.

Correct! Next one.

Peter Kay, riding a sleigh.

-On a motorway!

-Wahey!

Next one.

Erm... Kiss...

What sort of vegetable is it?

Fruit... Erm...

-Let's move on and we'll come back to it.

-OK.

OK, next one.

Mel B, drinking tea.

On a Christmas tree.

Right, next one.

Colin Farrell in a barrel.

-Singing a carol.

-Correct, here we go.

Erm...

Russell Crowe with Marilyn Monroe,

-under the mistletoe.

-Yeah! Let's move back.

One to go.

-Brussels sprout...?

-Yep.

Pout of the sprout...

-..at the checkout!

-Yes!

APPLAUSE

-I was afraid I wouldn't get that!

-Well done!

Oh, you'll be seeing the delights of the Northern Lights,

you've won the holiday!

Oh, congratulations!

Well, that's it for Partners In Rhyme for today.

A big thank you to Kimberley Walsh...

CHEERING

..Ainsley Harriott... CHEERING

Michelle Collins and Tyger Drew-Honey.

CHEERING

We'll see you soon and remember - if you've got the time...

..Len's got the rhyme!

Merry Christmas, everyone!

Good night!

APPLAUSE

# There's been rhymes from the start of time

# Get a word or a name, one that sounds the same

# Poems, sonnets, limericks, verses

# Rhymes in love and rhymes in curses

# I've been rapping since a very young man

# But that was cockney rhyming slang

# This is the end, we've all had a time

# You've had a good game, you've had a good rhyme

# Join us again for more larks and mishaps

# That's the end for tonight and that's a wrap. #