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This programme contains some strong language. | 0:00:02 | 0:00:10 | |
This programme contains adult humour. | 0:00:10 | 0:00:18 | |
I'm Darryn Lyons and I'm one of this year's most annoying celebrities. | 0:00:24 | 0:00:28 | |
Giddy up, God bless you. | 0:00:28 | 0:00:31 | |
Welcome to this year's collection of the most annoying people of 2011. | 0:00:31 | 0:00:34 | |
Hi, are you all right? | 0:00:34 | 0:00:36 | |
ARGH! | 0:00:36 | 0:00:37 | |
We're going to have a good time, whatever happens. | 0:00:39 | 0:00:42 | |
In Britain, the more wrong it goes, the more we like it. | 0:00:42 | 0:00:46 | |
A year where being an annoying celebrity has reached epic new proportions. | 0:00:46 | 0:00:51 | |
Celebrities like always annoying people. | 0:00:51 | 0:00:53 | |
Over the past 12 months, we've been drawing up a hit list | 0:00:53 | 0:00:56 | |
of the most annoying people from around the globe. | 0:00:56 | 0:00:59 | |
-This beautiful flower for you. -He's lucky Madonna didn't take that hydrangea and slap him. | 0:00:59 | 0:01:04 | |
-Pop stars. -Hello, everybody. | 0:01:04 | 0:01:07 | |
-Politicians. -I'll never forgive him. I'm not returning his calls at all. | 0:01:07 | 0:01:11 | |
Phone hackers. | 0:01:11 | 0:01:12 | |
Staff have been putting the finishing touches to the last edition | 0:01:12 | 0:01:16 | |
of the News of the World because of the latest phone-hacking allegations. | 0:01:16 | 0:01:20 | |
All the ones that have done their best to rattle our cages and trouble our Twitter. | 0:01:20 | 0:01:25 | |
What do you think of all this? | 0:01:25 | 0:01:26 | |
It's nothing less than huge. | 0:01:26 | 0:01:28 | |
We've got superstar meltdowns... | 0:01:28 | 0:01:30 | |
All he talked about was hookers and drugs and money, and he's really lost. | 0:01:30 | 0:01:35 | |
-..super injunctions... -How about you just don't do shit? How about that? | 0:01:35 | 0:01:40 | |
How about you just behave? | 0:01:40 | 0:01:41 | |
..and some super-enhanced bodies. | 0:01:41 | 0:01:43 | |
I can walk around with a T-shirt that says, "Call my agent". I'm annoying. | 0:01:43 | 0:01:47 | |
Geordies and gypsies gave TV a whole new breed of extra annoying reality stars. | 0:01:47 | 0:01:52 | |
I thank God for everything He's done for me. | 0:01:52 | 0:01:55 | |
Any girl that spits in a man's face is a girl I want to be rolling with. | 0:01:55 | 0:02:00 | |
Pop's divas continued their battle of shock and awe... | 0:02:02 | 0:02:06 | |
Whips and chains. Does she want to be a jockey, a dog handler? | 0:02:06 | 0:02:10 | |
..whilst Justin Bieber just stank of his own perfume. | 0:02:10 | 0:02:13 | |
Is it for girls? | 0:02:13 | 0:02:15 | |
-Katie Price got herself a new man... -I haven't got a particular type. | 0:02:15 | 0:02:19 | |
..Shane Warne got a new face... | 0:02:19 | 0:02:21 | |
There's nothing more annoying in a man than a badly-plucked eyebrow. | 0:02:21 | 0:02:25 | |
..and, never one to be outdone, Lindsay Lohan got herself a new prison sentence. | 0:02:25 | 0:02:28 | |
The fact that she just wants to nick things is just appalling. | 0:02:28 | 0:02:33 | |
# I wanna sing | 0:02:33 | 0:02:35 | |
# I wanna shout | 0:02:35 | 0:02:37 | |
# I wanna scream till the words dry out... # | 0:02:37 | 0:02:41 | |
2011 has also been the year of the unexpected. | 0:02:41 | 0:02:44 | |
Looters and rioters shattered our big cities. | 0:02:44 | 0:02:48 | |
Across the world, a new breed of sluts reclaim the streets. | 0:02:48 | 0:02:52 | |
It's an attempt to reclaim the word "slut" itself. | 0:02:52 | 0:02:55 | |
An old boy preacher predicted the end of the world. | 0:02:55 | 0:02:59 | |
Did I say today? I mean next year, sorry, sorry. | 0:02:59 | 0:03:02 | |
But no-one could have predicted that a bridesmaid's derriere | 0:03:02 | 0:03:05 | |
would steal the limelight from a Royal bride. | 0:03:05 | 0:03:08 | |
Pippa's bum just took over the nation. | 0:03:08 | 0:03:10 | |
Whilst girls were busy saying, "I do", | 0:03:10 | 0:03:13 | |
the boys were busy saying, "I don't want politicians on my ward..." | 0:03:13 | 0:03:18 | |
I'm not having it. Now, out. | 0:03:18 | 0:03:20 | |
"..don't want women referees..." | 0:03:20 | 0:03:22 | |
For some reason, the offside rule is apparently like kryptonite to us. | 0:03:22 | 0:03:25 | |
"..and don't to talk about my 13-year-old illegitimate love child." | 0:03:25 | 0:03:28 | |
(AS SCHWARZENEGGER) And from the cleaner, I had a child. Don't tell anyone. | 0:03:28 | 0:03:33 | |
So, coming up, we've got loser looters, barking brides, | 0:03:33 | 0:03:37 | |
a pie-wielding comedian and even a talking orange. | 0:03:37 | 0:03:40 | |
-Hey, Apple! -What? -You look fruity! | 0:03:40 | 0:03:43 | |
ORANGE LAUGHS | 0:03:43 | 0:03:44 | |
So, sit back and vent with vehemence as we introduce the most pesky, | 0:03:44 | 0:03:49 | |
the most irksome, and the most annoying irritants of 2011. | 0:03:49 | 0:03:54 | |
We begin our most annoying journey with the shocking tale | 0:03:58 | 0:04:02 | |
of ex-cricketer Shane Warne's voyage into metrosexuality. | 0:04:02 | 0:04:06 | |
He was rugged. | 0:04:06 | 0:04:07 | |
Loves a lager. | 0:04:07 | 0:04:08 | |
He bulky and he's burly. | 0:04:08 | 0:04:10 | |
He had foibles. He had faults. | 0:04:10 | 0:04:13 | |
His hair smelt of cigarettes. He was pure man. | 0:04:13 | 0:04:16 | |
He didn't really even look like he showered, let alone groomed. | 0:04:16 | 0:04:19 | |
Butch Aussie, macho beer-drinking, pie-eating, baked-bean eating | 0:04:19 | 0:04:24 | |
Aussie man. What's happened to Warnie? | 0:04:24 | 0:04:27 | |
He's been...changed. | 0:04:31 | 0:04:34 | |
She's kind of pulled him in. | 0:04:34 | 0:04:36 | |
She's got this kind of, you know, bewitching way about her. | 0:04:36 | 0:04:41 | |
And it's interesting that Liz Hurley once played the devil in a film | 0:04:41 | 0:04:44 | |
because there's something wrong with this. | 0:04:44 | 0:04:49 | |
Liz has got her claws and teeth and Estee Lauder | 0:04:49 | 0:04:53 | |
and Botox. It's just so un-Australian, Shane. | 0:04:53 | 0:04:58 | |
# Man, I feel like a woman... # | 0:04:58 | 0:05:02 | |
What has he had done to his face? | 0:05:02 | 0:05:05 | |
He's gone a strange shade of orange. | 0:05:05 | 0:05:09 | |
There is nothing more annoying in a man than a badly-plucked eyebrow. | 0:05:09 | 0:05:12 | |
Tweezers can be deadly in the wrong hands. | 0:05:12 | 0:05:15 | |
It's so kind of swollen, and he's had his teeth done, | 0:05:15 | 0:05:19 | |
it looks like, and his lips look weird. | 0:05:19 | 0:05:23 | |
Is he so whipped up into some kind of sexual frenzy by Elizabeth, | 0:05:23 | 0:05:26 | |
that he literally can't think any more? | 0:05:26 | 0:05:29 | |
It's a fascinating situation. | 0:05:29 | 0:05:31 | |
Well, it would be fascinating if it wasn't so annoying. | 0:05:31 | 0:05:34 | |
Next on our list of annoyance... | 0:05:37 | 0:05:40 | |
..what could be nicer than a nice refreshing ice cream? | 0:05:42 | 0:05:46 | |
Surely, nothing to get annoyed about here. | 0:05:46 | 0:05:48 | |
Rum and raisin, raspberry ripple. | 0:05:48 | 0:05:51 | |
# Ra, ra, ah-ah-ah... # | 0:05:51 | 0:05:52 | |
Not for this new Covent Garden ice-cream emporium. | 0:05:52 | 0:05:56 | |
Breast milk. | 0:05:56 | 0:05:58 | |
My three boys have all been raised on breast milk. | 0:05:58 | 0:06:01 | |
It's the most natural, beautiful thing in the world. | 0:06:01 | 0:06:04 | |
It's beautiful, organic, free-range, totally natural, | 0:06:04 | 0:06:07 | |
good enough for my kids, good enough for our ice cream. | 0:06:07 | 0:06:10 | |
# You're as cold as ice... # | 0:06:10 | 0:06:12 | |
In February this year, the arrival of Baby Gaga ice cream, | 0:06:12 | 0:06:16 | |
churned from the breast milk of a mum from Leeds, caused something of a meltdown. | 0:06:16 | 0:06:21 | |
Sorry, the thought of it makes me feel quite ill. | 0:06:21 | 0:06:23 | |
Oh, God. | 0:06:23 | 0:06:25 | |
No, thank you. | 0:06:25 | 0:06:27 | |
I think it's a bit of a yuck factor, isn't it? | 0:06:29 | 0:06:31 | |
It smells fine. | 0:06:31 | 0:06:33 | |
Disgusting. Appalling. Gag-inducing. | 0:06:33 | 0:06:37 | |
I don't want to taste breast milk. | 0:06:37 | 0:06:39 | |
I don't even want to taste my own breast milk and I certainly, | 0:06:39 | 0:06:42 | |
God help me, don't want to taste yours. | 0:06:42 | 0:06:44 | |
You're bound to have a yuck factor with a breast-milk ice cream. | 0:06:44 | 0:06:48 | |
But when you think about it, it's the most natural thing in the world. | 0:06:48 | 0:06:53 | |
Westminster Council didn't agree, and seized the titty tutti frutti, | 0:06:53 | 0:06:59 | |
but after vigorous testing, had to admit they'd boobed | 0:06:59 | 0:07:02 | |
and it went back on sale to a doubtful public. | 0:07:02 | 0:07:04 | |
Aah, here we go. | 0:07:04 | 0:07:08 | |
Mmm, oh, that is actually... | 0:07:12 | 0:07:15 | |
That's pretty good, yeah. | 0:07:15 | 0:07:16 | |
What kind of a person with normal mental health | 0:07:16 | 0:07:21 | |
wants to eat breast-milk ice cream? | 0:07:21 | 0:07:26 | |
(CREEPILY) "Can I have a breast-milk ice cream, please?" | 0:07:26 | 0:07:28 | |
That's all it's going to attract. | 0:07:28 | 0:07:30 | |
"Can you just put one sultana on top of the... | 0:07:30 | 0:07:32 | |
"on top there, yes?" | 0:07:32 | 0:07:34 | |
"Can I have some hundreds and thousands for the areola?" | 0:07:34 | 0:07:36 | |
I think it's disgusting, yeah. Not very nice. | 0:07:36 | 0:07:40 | |
What if I develop a taste for it? | 0:07:40 | 0:07:42 | |
Where do I go from there? | 0:07:42 | 0:07:44 | |
I start breaking into hospitals, going up to sleeping women. | 0:07:44 | 0:07:48 | |
Someone's breastfeeding their kid on a bus and I get involved | 0:07:48 | 0:07:50 | |
and then I'm the creep, I'm the loser, | 0:07:50 | 0:07:52 | |
I'm on the front page of the paper - "pervert". | 0:07:52 | 0:07:54 | |
# Ra, ra, ra-ah-ah... # | 0:07:54 | 0:07:57 | |
Even more annoyed was pop superstar Lady Gaga, | 0:07:57 | 0:07:59 | |
who called the product "nausea-inducing" and detrimental to her image, | 0:07:59 | 0:08:04 | |
and threatened legal action unless it was taken off sale. | 0:08:04 | 0:08:08 | |
She's just annoyed she didn't think of it first. | 0:08:08 | 0:08:12 | |
Next time she comes on stage, she can come on as a giant breast | 0:08:12 | 0:08:15 | |
and just literally be spurted onto the stage amidst milk. | 0:08:15 | 0:08:18 | |
I thought she would just turn it into a publicity stunt | 0:08:18 | 0:08:22 | |
and just be in the kitchen with two suckers attached to her boobs going, # Ooh, la, la-la-la! # | 0:08:22 | 0:08:27 | |
That's the most crazy woman that we've got. | 0:08:28 | 0:08:31 | |
When you go crazy, you go Lady Gaga and SHE thought it was strange. | 0:08:31 | 0:08:35 | |
Get it off the shelves, seriously. It's weird. | 0:08:35 | 0:08:39 | |
# Want your bad romance. # | 0:08:39 | 0:08:41 | |
Have you got any more? | 0:08:43 | 0:08:45 | |
At 48, it's the vajazzle queen. | 0:08:45 | 0:08:47 | |
# When I grow up I wanna be famous... # | 0:08:50 | 0:08:52 | |
It's been a year of an annoyingly high profile for tabloid darling Amy Childs. | 0:08:52 | 0:08:57 | |
She's the girl who shot to fame on TV show The Only Way is Essex | 0:08:57 | 0:09:00 | |
for her intimate female decorating skills, and not much else. | 0:09:00 | 0:09:05 | |
Amy Childs is annoying because | 0:09:05 | 0:09:07 | |
all she's basically doing is putting sequins on vaginas, | 0:09:07 | 0:09:10 | |
but how does that make you worthy of my attention? | 0:09:10 | 0:09:13 | |
Er, shut up. | 0:09:13 | 0:09:14 | |
She's not particularly talented. She's not particularly intelligent. | 0:09:14 | 0:09:17 | |
Oh, my God. I can't believe it. | 0:09:17 | 0:09:20 | |
She said something about wanting to be the next Jordan or something, | 0:09:20 | 0:09:23 | |
and that's... | 0:09:23 | 0:09:25 | |
What a fabulously annoying aspiration to have! | 0:09:25 | 0:09:29 | |
Amy's strategy for becoming this year's Katie Price began by waving goodbye to her TOWIE roots | 0:09:29 | 0:09:35 | |
to join other red-carpet Z-listers on this year's Celebrity Big Brother. | 0:09:35 | 0:09:38 | |
For Amy, going on Big Brother was just sort of a natural step for her. | 0:09:38 | 0:09:42 | |
I mean, she was being cut out of TOWIE because... she wasn't that interesting. | 0:09:42 | 0:09:46 | |
In what is essentially just a televised popularity contest, | 0:09:48 | 0:09:51 | |
she finished behind Jedward and behind Kerry Katona - | 0:09:51 | 0:09:55 | |
a woman who can't even be paid to advertise frozen buffets any more. | 0:09:55 | 0:09:59 | |
Is that really what you want on your CV? I don't know. | 0:09:59 | 0:10:02 | |
She may have been a turn-off on Big Brother, but with her very own | 0:10:02 | 0:10:06 | |
Channel 5 reality show and a big money supermarket ad campaign, | 0:10:06 | 0:10:09 | |
it looks like Amy's annoying fame is set to continue. | 0:10:09 | 0:10:13 | |
Maybe we're all just "well jeal". | 0:10:13 | 0:10:16 | |
Just because she's been on telly, she's now quite a big celebrity. | 0:10:16 | 0:10:19 | |
The word celebrity, it used to mean something. It feels dirty now. | 0:10:19 | 0:10:24 | |
I'm jealous of Amy Childs, you know. | 0:10:24 | 0:10:26 | |
I'm going to grow my hair long, get my tits done, get some fake tan on. | 0:10:26 | 0:10:30 | |
I'm there. I'm made. | 0:10:30 | 0:10:32 | |
Apparating in at 47... | 0:10:33 | 0:10:35 | |
After seven kids' books, eight movies | 0:10:35 | 0:10:39 | |
and over £10 billion profit, we can finally say goodbye to perky Harry. | 0:10:39 | 0:10:44 | |
# I'm kissing you goodbye... # | 0:10:44 | 0:10:46 | |
Harry Potter. | 0:10:46 | 0:10:48 | |
-Harry Potter, I can't believe it. -And his big Harry wand. | 0:10:48 | 0:10:51 | |
I can't believe it's over. | 0:10:51 | 0:10:52 | |
It's absolutely been a bad spell of Harry Potter all the way through | 0:10:52 | 0:10:57 | |
and me, for one, I'm glad that 2011 marks the end of Harry Potter. | 0:10:57 | 0:11:02 | |
# I'm kissing you goodbye... # | 0:11:02 | 0:11:05 | |
Fine with children enjoying Harry Potter. Not OK with adults. | 0:11:05 | 0:11:08 | |
I've been to quite a few of the premieres before, | 0:11:08 | 0:11:11 | |
but I've never managed to get any autographs, | 0:11:11 | 0:11:14 | |
so, hopefully, today I'll do that. | 0:11:14 | 0:11:16 | |
My friends are like, "You've got to read the book. It's really good.! | 0:11:16 | 0:11:20 | |
I'll tell you what I really hate about Harry Potter - | 0:11:20 | 0:11:23 | |
people telling me that I have to read Harry Potter. | 0:11:23 | 0:11:26 | |
A long time ago, I read... the first two books. | 0:11:26 | 0:11:32 | |
They're like, "But you're going to love this one. | 0:11:32 | 0:11:34 | |
No, I know I won't love this! | 0:11:34 | 0:11:36 | |
It's amazing! | 0:11:36 | 0:11:37 | |
Hogwarts. Even the word is ridiculous. | 0:11:37 | 0:11:40 | |
Harry Potter is the most annoying, cos I don't know any others. | 0:11:40 | 0:11:43 | |
Is there a Dumbledorf? Is he a child? I don't like him. | 0:11:43 | 0:11:46 | |
Is there a Dumbledorf, though? | 0:11:46 | 0:11:48 | |
-Doobledorf? -Dumbledore. -I don't care. | 0:11:48 | 0:11:51 | |
I don't like him. I don't like him. There's a kid with red hair. I don't like him. | 0:11:51 | 0:11:55 | |
There's a girl. I don't like her. | 0:11:55 | 0:11:57 | |
But is this the last we will ever see of Potter and Co? | 0:11:57 | 0:12:01 | |
-It's not over. -JK Rowling will not let it go. She's like, "It's over! | 0:12:01 | 0:12:06 | |
"I'm done. Here's a theme park!" "It's over. I'm done. Here's a website!" | 0:12:06 | 0:12:09 | |
I'm sure the film companies will find another way to wring | 0:12:09 | 0:12:13 | |
more money out of Hogwarts and JK Rowling and Harry Potter. | 0:12:13 | 0:12:17 | |
There'll be a Harry Potter burger, or God knows what, but something. | 0:12:17 | 0:12:20 | |
They're not going to let that go. | 0:12:20 | 0:12:22 | |
SCREAMING | 0:12:22 | 0:12:25 | |
At number 46, we've got a case of an inappropriate erection. | 0:12:27 | 0:12:32 | |
Two and a half years after his death, | 0:12:32 | 0:12:35 | |
Michael Jackson is still making news | 0:12:35 | 0:12:37 | |
but the crime in question wasn't anything to do with dodgy doctors | 0:12:37 | 0:12:41 | |
but the vision of the King of Kensington, Mohammed Al Fayed. | 0:12:41 | 0:12:44 | |
The ex-Harrods boss and Jackson fan belatedly decided | 0:12:44 | 0:12:48 | |
he wanted to pay tribute to the King of Pop by commissioning | 0:12:48 | 0:12:51 | |
a brand-new life-sized statue. | 0:12:51 | 0:12:54 | |
Al Fayed was following in a long line of other artistic attempts. | 0:12:54 | 0:12:59 | |
Back in 1988, we had pop artist Jeff Koons' kitsch porcelain. | 0:12:59 | 0:13:02 | |
Look at the expression on his face in that one. | 0:13:02 | 0:13:05 | |
When you've got a monkey on your lap, you shouldn't look like that. | 0:13:05 | 0:13:08 | |
Earlier this year, we saw Maria von Kohler's freaky tribute | 0:13:08 | 0:13:12 | |
to Jackson's parenting skills unveiled in London. | 0:13:12 | 0:13:15 | |
I reckon every statue is supposed to encourage us. | 0:13:15 | 0:13:18 | |
That's how we should be in life. This is wrong. | 0:13:18 | 0:13:20 | |
And, of course, we can't forget | 0:13:20 | 0:13:23 | |
Michael's OWN unassuming little number back in 1995. | 0:13:23 | 0:13:25 | |
One of the moments when Michael Jackson's career | 0:13:25 | 0:13:29 | |
was essentially considered to be over, was when he decided to | 0:13:29 | 0:13:32 | |
bring down, on a barge on the Thames, a huge statue of himself. | 0:13:32 | 0:13:39 | |
So, how and where would the eccentric Egyptian pay homage? | 0:13:39 | 0:13:43 | |
Fans of the Fulham football club he owns got the hump | 0:13:46 | 0:13:49 | |
when he decided that their home ground, Craven Cottage - | 0:13:49 | 0:13:52 | |
a place Jacko had visited ONCE back in 1999 - | 0:13:52 | 0:13:56 | |
was the ideal place for his own personal memorial to the deceased pop star. | 0:13:56 | 0:14:02 | |
We all know he lived and breathed Fulham. | 0:14:02 | 0:14:05 | |
Some of his best songs are about Fulham - Black and White, | 0:14:05 | 0:14:08 | |
Bad - last season against Stoke, that's what he wrote it about. | 0:14:08 | 0:14:11 | |
# I'm bad, I'm bad | 0:14:11 | 0:14:13 | |
# Really, really bad | 0:14:13 | 0:14:14 | |
# You know I'm bad, I'm bad | 0:14:14 | 0:14:17 | |
# You know it... # | 0:14:17 | 0:14:19 | |
It looks cheap. For a man as rich as he is, he could have thrown | 0:14:19 | 0:14:23 | |
a bit more money at it and made it look...just respectable. | 0:14:23 | 0:14:27 | |
It looks like it's been painted by a kid. | 0:14:27 | 0:14:30 | |
I've been coming here for 35 years and that's the silliest thing I've ever seen. | 0:14:30 | 0:14:35 | |
The actual statue looks more like Michael | 0:14:35 | 0:14:38 | |
than the Michael we know himself. It's so much more plastic, just like how Michael's supposed to be. | 0:14:38 | 0:14:44 | |
It makes the club look silly. It's completely out of place. | 0:14:44 | 0:14:47 | |
I don't know what it's got to do with. | 0:14:47 | 0:14:49 | |
It might seem an unlikely place to pay tribute to Michael Jackson, | 0:14:49 | 0:14:53 | |
but Chairman Mohammed Al Fayed insisted everyone share in his enthusiasm. | 0:14:53 | 0:14:58 | |
If some stupid fans don't understand and appreciate such a gift | 0:14:58 | 0:15:03 | |
this guy gave to the world, you know, they can just go to hell. | 0:15:03 | 0:15:07 | |
-# Beat it -Beat it | 0:15:07 | 0:15:09 | |
-# Beat it -Beat it... # | 0:15:09 | 0:15:10 | |
Normally, when fans are critical of a football chairman, | 0:15:10 | 0:15:14 | |
the chairman does that very PR sort of thing of saying, you know, | 0:15:14 | 0:15:17 | |
"I respect your opinions, but this is something that's going to happen." | 0:15:17 | 0:15:21 | |
Al Fayed just doesn't get it. | 0:15:21 | 0:15:23 | |
He told them to go to hell and, if they want, go and support Chelsea. | 0:15:23 | 0:15:26 | |
That's how it should be done. It should be that level of honesty. I own the place. You jump on board. | 0:15:26 | 0:15:31 | |
-# Just beat it -Beat it | 0:15:31 | 0:15:33 | |
-# Beat it -Beat it... # | 0:15:33 | 0:15:34 | |
Mr Al Fayed wasn't the only celeb splashing his cash this year. | 0:15:34 | 0:15:38 | |
It's time for us to take a quick diversion to our top three chart | 0:15:40 | 0:15:44 | |
of 2011's most annoying celebrity spenders. | 0:15:44 | 0:15:48 | |
It's a girl's dream. | 0:15:48 | 0:15:49 | |
At number three, it's the Hollywood A-list couple who let the train take the strain. | 0:15:49 | 0:15:53 | |
Brad and Angelina wanted to go to Glasgow, where he was filming. | 0:15:53 | 0:15:57 | |
Most average people would get a train, or even a coach. | 0:15:57 | 0:16:01 | |
But no, we are going to charter our own train because we are | 0:16:01 | 0:16:04 | |
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie and we need a whole train to ourselves. It was about 60,000 to do the trip. | 0:16:04 | 0:16:09 | |
Can you imagine chartering a whole train just for yourselves? | 0:16:09 | 0:16:13 | |
At number two, it's Beyonce, who managed to annoy us by splashing | 0:16:13 | 0:16:17 | |
90 grand in 90 minutes on a shopping trip to London's Oxford Street. | 0:16:17 | 0:16:21 | |
The best thing was she went to Top Shop. | 0:16:21 | 0:16:24 | |
How do you spend 90 grand in Top Shop? | 0:16:24 | 0:16:27 | |
But even Beyonce's speed shopping looks like small change | 0:16:27 | 0:16:31 | |
next to our most annoying celebrity spenders of the year. | 0:16:31 | 0:16:35 | |
The Ecclestone sisters. | 0:16:35 | 0:16:37 | |
It's really horrible the way they're so crass with their money. | 0:16:37 | 0:16:41 | |
When it comes to annoying celebrity spending, no-one can compete with Tamara and Petra Ecclestone, | 0:16:41 | 0:16:47 | |
the daughters of billionaire Formula One boss, Bernie Ecclestone. | 0:16:47 | 0:16:51 | |
With Daddy being so rich, | 0:16:51 | 0:16:52 | |
Petra had no problem forking out £12 million on her wedding | 0:16:52 | 0:16:55 | |
this year, and then snapped up a modest little place for when she's in LA. | 0:16:55 | 0:17:00 | |
Petra Ecclestone bought the Spelling mansion for over 80 million. | 0:17:00 | 0:17:04 | |
I definitely think, in this age of austerity, that people who are | 0:17:04 | 0:17:08 | |
splashing their cash is really not something that people want to see any more. | 0:17:08 | 0:17:14 | |
Not to be outdone by her little sis, Tamara also hit the headlines | 0:17:14 | 0:17:17 | |
this year, when she blew £1 million on a new bath. | 0:17:17 | 0:17:21 | |
Yes, that's a million pounds on a bath. | 0:17:21 | 0:17:24 | |
The fact that Tamara Ecclestone recently added a £1 million | 0:17:25 | 0:17:29 | |
crystal bath tub to her £45 million Chelsea apartment is selfish, | 0:17:29 | 0:17:34 | |
I find it indulgent and I find it a little bit disgusting. | 0:17:34 | 0:17:38 | |
What's annoying about having a £1 million crystal bath | 0:17:38 | 0:17:43 | |
is you're still going to have to clean the pubes out of it. | 0:17:43 | 0:17:47 | |
Back to business at 45, the question of cash gets even dirtier. | 0:17:50 | 0:17:54 | |
# Money, money, money, money... # | 0:17:54 | 0:17:56 | |
Most British high streets are not awash with cash or million-pound baths. | 0:17:56 | 0:18:00 | |
This year, as the world's financial downturn continued, | 0:18:00 | 0:18:03 | |
the public became increasingly angry at the role bankers and traders played in the recession. | 0:18:03 | 0:18:08 | |
So, back in September, when one motormouth money man | 0:18:08 | 0:18:11 | |
appeared on the BBC News channel, he really got us annoyed. | 0:18:11 | 0:18:15 | |
A plan was announced to pump two trillion Euros | 0:18:15 | 0:18:18 | |
into the Eurozone bailout funds, and all I knew | 0:18:18 | 0:18:22 | |
from the guidance I'd been given | 0:18:22 | 0:18:24 | |
is that I was going to be getting reaction to this | 0:18:24 | 0:18:27 | |
'from a man called Alessio Rastani, who was an independent day trader.' | 0:18:27 | 0:18:32 | |
Right, can you pin down exactly what would keep investors happy, | 0:18:32 | 0:18:36 | |
make them feel more confident? | 0:18:36 | 0:18:38 | |
I happened to be watching when... what's his name now? | 0:18:38 | 0:18:42 | |
A man so anonymous, even HE hadn't heard of himself. | 0:18:42 | 0:18:45 | |
It doesn't matter how much money they want to put in, | 0:18:45 | 0:18:48 | |
it's not going to work. | 0:18:48 | 0:18:50 | |
We do a lot of these interviews where people don't necessarily | 0:18:50 | 0:18:53 | |
give you a particularly memorable sound bite, | 0:18:53 | 0:18:57 | |
but this man turned out to be really rather different. | 0:18:57 | 0:18:59 | |
The market is toast. The stock market is finished. | 0:18:59 | 0:19:02 | |
The governments don't rule the world, | 0:19:02 | 0:19:04 | |
Goldman Sachs rules the world. | 0:19:04 | 0:19:06 | |
If I see an opportunity to make money, I go with that. | 0:19:06 | 0:19:09 | |
He pretty much pointed out the economy is falling apart. | 0:19:09 | 0:19:11 | |
We knew that anyway. Yeah. | 0:19:11 | 0:19:13 | |
He was wearing a pink tie. That was quite annoying. | 0:19:13 | 0:19:16 | |
We don't really care that much how they're going to fix the economy, | 0:19:16 | 0:19:19 | |
how they're going to fix the whole situation. | 0:19:19 | 0:19:22 | |
Our job is to make money from it. | 0:19:22 | 0:19:24 | |
They guy was just expressing | 0:19:24 | 0:19:26 | |
what many thousands of bankers are thinking. | 0:19:26 | 0:19:30 | |
I go to bed, I dream of another recession, of another moment like this. | 0:19:30 | 0:19:34 | |
'There was this sort of intake of breath.' | 0:19:34 | 0:19:36 | |
There was this metaphorical and literal collective dropping of jaws. | 0:19:36 | 0:19:41 | |
What I meant was I dream of a market crash | 0:19:41 | 0:19:43 | |
and that's kind of strange for a lot of people. | 0:19:43 | 0:19:46 | |
Why would anyone be dreaming of a market crash? Isn't that a bad thing? | 0:19:46 | 0:19:50 | |
For God's sake, I dream of werewolves and flying, | 0:19:50 | 0:19:52 | |
but you don't see me on the news crowing on about it. | 0:19:52 | 0:19:55 | |
The biggest risk people can take right now is not acting. | 0:19:55 | 0:19:59 | |
-Do you dream about the economy at night? -I try not to. -Yeah. | 0:19:59 | 0:20:03 | |
'As I walked out of that TV studio on that day,' | 0:20:03 | 0:20:06 | |
I noticed that something was wrong - | 0:20:06 | 0:20:08 | |
even the people around me in the studio and the reception | 0:20:08 | 0:20:11 | |
were looking at me - they'd seen what I'd just said on TV. | 0:20:11 | 0:20:14 | |
I sensed there's something different, something wrong. | 0:20:14 | 0:20:17 | |
And the reaction by the end of that night was huge - | 0:20:17 | 0:20:20 | |
newspapers talking about it. The next day, reporters calling me. | 0:20:20 | 0:20:24 | |
I've got Forbes Magazine, New York Magazine calling me | 0:20:24 | 0:20:27 | |
and I couldn't understand what's going on, so it was unbelievable. | 0:20:27 | 0:20:30 | |
-# Money talks -Listen... # | 0:20:30 | 0:20:34 | |
Alessio's outspoken claims were dismissed by some as attention-seeking antics, | 0:20:34 | 0:20:38 | |
but they did attract invitations from the biggest names on TV to explain himself. | 0:20:38 | 0:20:43 | |
His whole attitude was quite annoying. | 0:20:43 | 0:20:46 | |
Apparently, he's going to get very rich off of this depression now | 0:20:46 | 0:20:49 | |
and we have to do something about it. I'll get annoyed. | 0:20:49 | 0:20:52 | |
I'll throw a brick through my television next time I see him on there. | 0:20:52 | 0:20:55 | |
I heard that I'd been selected for the most annoying people of 2011. | 0:20:55 | 0:21:00 | |
I think, if anything, I've been annoyingly accurate. | 0:21:00 | 0:21:03 | |
What he's actually done, is he's told us where bankers stand | 0:21:03 | 0:21:07 | |
and much as many of us thought, it's directly behind us | 0:21:07 | 0:21:11 | |
with a scalpel, draining us of our life blood. | 0:21:11 | 0:21:15 | |
-# Money talks -Listen... # | 0:21:15 | 0:21:19 | |
At 44, it's the rapper who's getting more famous for his rants than his rhymes. | 0:21:19 | 0:21:25 | |
Kanye West - the man that put the C into rap. | 0:21:27 | 0:21:30 | |
Kanye is definitely the most self-absorbed | 0:21:30 | 0:21:33 | |
and conceited rapper out there, because he's under | 0:21:33 | 0:21:36 | |
the assumption that everyone is constantly | 0:21:36 | 0:21:38 | |
concerned with him and what he's doing in his personal life. | 0:21:38 | 0:21:41 | |
Whining West took annoyance to new heights this year | 0:21:41 | 0:21:44 | |
when he elevated himself to being up there with the most hated man in history. | 0:21:44 | 0:21:47 | |
My God, Kanye, you've done it this time. Comparing himself, now, to Hitler. | 0:21:47 | 0:21:51 | |
Unfair, obviously. Hitler at least had some people that liked him. | 0:21:58 | 0:22:02 | |
# Don't speak I know just what you're saying... # | 0:22:02 | 0:22:05 | |
Even that comparison, he meant it as like, "Ah, I'm a victim". | 0:22:05 | 0:22:09 | |
But you're still comparing yourself | 0:22:09 | 0:22:11 | |
to a man who tried to take over the world. | 0:22:11 | 0:22:13 | |
It's still arrogant. No matter what he says, it's arrogant. | 0:22:13 | 0:22:17 | |
Comparing yourself to Hitler is a bit extreme, and it's going to make headlines. | 0:22:17 | 0:22:21 | |
He's definitely courting a little controversy, and he loves that. | 0:22:21 | 0:22:25 | |
Whenever I hear him talk, I think, remember when he had a car accident and had his jaw wired shut? | 0:22:25 | 0:22:30 | |
Those were good times. | 0:22:30 | 0:22:32 | |
Renowned for his own bizarre sense of style, Kanye's next annoyance in 2011 | 0:22:32 | 0:22:38 | |
was a bid to become king of the catwalk, | 0:22:38 | 0:22:41 | |
launching his very own diffusion line for dames at Paris Fashion Week. | 0:22:41 | 0:22:45 | |
His fashion collection, annoying and a huge, huge disaster. | 0:22:45 | 0:22:50 | |
Now he's taken to leading a line in fashion of harem pants and ladies' cardigans. | 0:22:50 | 0:22:56 | |
What? What is going on there? | 0:22:56 | 0:22:58 | |
The stuff that he created for Louis Vuitton | 0:22:58 | 0:23:01 | |
made me throw up in the store and then I had to purchase the shoes. | 0:23:01 | 0:23:04 | |
With the fashion fallout, what should the Hitler of hip-hop do next? | 0:23:04 | 0:23:08 | |
Your music is good. Just rely on that. | 0:23:08 | 0:23:10 | |
Stop tweeting out annoying things. Stop taking yourself too seriously. | 0:23:10 | 0:23:15 | |
I just think his ego has gotten enormously, gigantically massive. | 0:23:15 | 0:23:19 | |
I think what would be best for the world in 2012 | 0:23:19 | 0:23:22 | |
is if Kanye West becomes a mute. | 0:23:22 | 0:23:24 | |
At number 43, some mothers who maybe DON'T know best. | 0:23:24 | 0:23:29 | |
# What would my mama do? # | 0:23:29 | 0:23:33 | |
2011 has seen the rise of the horrible, pushy, showy mum | 0:23:33 | 0:23:39 | |
who wants their daughter to be famous, | 0:23:39 | 0:23:41 | |
whatever the cost and, unfortunately, that cost | 0:23:41 | 0:23:44 | |
seems to be their appearance, their health, their general wellbeing. | 0:23:44 | 0:23:48 | |
# I whip my hair back and forth... # | 0:23:48 | 0:23:52 | |
In 2011, pushy mums have been slapped across the nation's headlines | 0:23:52 | 0:23:55 | |
for indulging their darling daughters just a little too much | 0:23:55 | 0:23:59 | |
and one British mum whipped us into a frenzy for confessing | 0:23:59 | 0:24:02 | |
she'd Botoxed her seven-year-old child in a deranged bid | 0:24:02 | 0:24:05 | |
to help her daughter find fame like her idol, Willow Smith. | 0:24:05 | 0:24:09 | |
# So keep the party jumpin'... # | 0:24:09 | 0:24:12 | |
Disgusting. How can you put Botox into a child's face? | 0:24:12 | 0:24:15 | |
If she has got lines on the face, sort yourself out, love. | 0:24:15 | 0:24:18 | |
Have a clay face mask. | 0:24:18 | 0:24:20 | |
Don't you just hate it when you hit five | 0:24:20 | 0:24:22 | |
and Mother Nature starts taking a toll? | 0:24:22 | 0:24:25 | |
It all goes and it all goes south. Those non-existent boobs that you've developed | 0:24:25 | 0:24:29 | |
are hanging by your ankles. | 0:24:29 | 0:24:31 | |
It's just ridiculous. I mean, what are these women thinking?! | 0:24:31 | 0:24:34 | |
# And now you wanna pretend that you're a superstar... # | 0:24:34 | 0:24:38 | |
But our most annoying plastic parent of 2011 goes to Sarah Burge. | 0:24:38 | 0:24:43 | |
She spent half a million turning herself into a Botox Barbie | 0:24:43 | 0:24:47 | |
and thinks her daughters should totter in her tiny footsteps. | 0:24:47 | 0:24:51 | |
# When everyone's gone and you are by yourself... # | 0:24:51 | 0:24:54 | |
Seven-year-old Poppy and mother Sarah Burge bond over beauty so much | 0:24:54 | 0:24:59 | |
that 50-year-old Sarah has given her little girl a voucher | 0:24:59 | 0:25:03 | |
for breast implants, that she can use when she turns 18. | 0:25:03 | 0:25:06 | |
The only think a seven-year-old should be deciding | 0:25:06 | 0:25:09 | |
is whether she wants to watch Peppa Pig or Blue Peter. | 0:25:09 | 0:25:11 | |
There's no need for her to be deciding if she wants bigger boobs, bigger lips or anything. | 0:25:11 | 0:25:17 | |
I'm almost lost for words, which doesn't happen very often. | 0:25:17 | 0:25:20 | |
It's absolutely sick. It's warped. It's crazy. | 0:25:20 | 0:25:23 | |
Someone needs to speak to this woman. | 0:25:23 | 0:25:25 | |
Sarah justified her pushy parenting earlier this year on BBC Three show Botox Britain. | 0:25:29 | 0:25:34 | |
The problem is that every girl starts to think, "I need to look a certain way", | 0:25:34 | 0:25:40 | |
and address it and, for me, that is a depressing horror future. | 0:25:40 | 0:25:44 | |
It might well be, but that's the reality of life, isn't it? | 0:25:44 | 0:25:48 | |
The playground is ruthless. It's like being on a fashion parade going to school. | 0:25:48 | 0:25:52 | |
Mums justify it by saying, "Well, look at my daughter. | 0:25:52 | 0:25:55 | |
"They ask for it. They want it." I asked for a pet dinosaur when I was seven. | 0:25:55 | 0:26:00 | |
It was neither feasible nor possible. OK? | 0:26:00 | 0:26:02 | |
And that should be the same with your seven-year-old daughter wanting tits. | 0:26:02 | 0:26:06 | |
Do not allow it to happen. | 0:26:06 | 0:26:07 | |
All these crazy mums out there, | 0:26:07 | 0:26:09 | |
it should be, "Here's your boob job, here's your tattooing of eyebrows | 0:26:09 | 0:26:12 | |
"and here's your therapist that I will personally pay for | 0:26:12 | 0:26:15 | |
"from the ages of 15 to 30, when you start slutting it up." | 0:26:15 | 0:26:18 | |
Popping up next is reluctant role model, Rihanna. | 0:26:19 | 0:26:22 | |
More used to being number one, this Barbadian balladeer only makes it in at number 42 | 0:26:22 | 0:26:28 | |
on our parade of annoyance. | 0:26:28 | 0:26:30 | |
Get lo-o-o-o-oud! | 0:26:30 | 0:26:32 | |
Indeed, some question what the saucy songstress is doing here at all. | 0:26:32 | 0:26:36 | |
I'm shocked how Rihanna is on the most annoying. I think she's... I think she's brilliant. | 0:26:36 | 0:26:41 | |
I love Rihanna. | 0:26:41 | 0:26:42 | |
I love all of her music videos. Not her music, just the videos. | 0:26:42 | 0:26:46 | |
# Cos I may be bad But I'm perfectly good at it... # | 0:26:46 | 0:26:50 | |
Raunchy Riri was in our face straightaway this year | 0:26:50 | 0:26:52 | |
with this kinky chorus banned from a dozen countries and daytime Radio One. | 0:26:52 | 0:26:57 | |
# Chains and whips excite me... # | 0:26:57 | 0:27:00 | |
My little sister is nine years old. | 0:27:00 | 0:27:02 | |
I don't want my little sister talking about S&M. | 0:27:02 | 0:27:05 | |
Damn you, Rihanna, stop that. | 0:27:05 | 0:27:07 | |
No, you're a role model, behave yourself. | 0:27:07 | 0:27:10 | |
# I like it, like it... # | 0:27:10 | 0:27:12 | |
These women put flashlights on their vaginas | 0:27:12 | 0:27:14 | |
and have fireworks shooting out of their breasts. | 0:27:14 | 0:27:17 | |
They're not a moral compass. | 0:27:17 | 0:27:18 | |
They are to dance around and blow-dry your hair to. | 0:27:18 | 0:27:21 | |
# M, M, M S, S, S, and... # | 0:27:21 | 0:27:24 | |
It's really gotten extreme. Just when I wanted to like Rihanna, she's slutted it up. | 0:27:24 | 0:27:28 | |
Now, when a farmer in Northern Ireland agreed to | 0:27:30 | 0:27:33 | |
lend his field to a film crew for a pop video, he had no idea what he was letting himself in for. | 0:27:33 | 0:27:39 | |
Being Rihanna, she'd forgot to pack any clothes, | 0:27:39 | 0:27:42 | |
so she was in there in the field jumping around, and most people | 0:27:42 | 0:27:46 | |
would be happy about this, apart from one person. That was the farmer. | 0:27:46 | 0:27:49 | |
# We don't have to take our clothes off | 0:27:49 | 0:27:52 | |
# To have a good time... # | 0:27:52 | 0:27:55 | |
The farmer told her, "Look, this isn't going on. | 0:27:55 | 0:27:58 | |
"I'm a Christian here. I don't want this filth in my field." | 0:27:58 | 0:28:02 | |
Not only that, all the traffic stopped to watch and perve. | 0:28:02 | 0:28:07 | |
He went over to her and he said, | 0:28:07 | 0:28:10 | |
"You shouldn't have to take off your top to make a living". | 0:28:10 | 0:28:14 | |
And in one fell swoop, this small Northern Irish farmer | 0:28:14 | 0:28:17 | |
landed sort of a feminist critique | 0:28:17 | 0:28:19 | |
that hundreds of politicians or feminists couldn't land. | 0:28:19 | 0:28:22 | |
You're the most powerful woman in music right now. | 0:28:24 | 0:28:27 | |
Why do you think you still have to run around topless? | 0:28:27 | 0:28:30 | |
"Oh, because I'm liberated. It makes me feel sexy." | 0:28:30 | 0:28:33 | |
You're in a field in Northern Ireland. | 0:28:33 | 0:28:36 | |
# Now we're standing side by side... # | 0:28:36 | 0:28:38 | |
Can you imagine that happening to Madonna or even Britney Spears? | 0:28:38 | 0:28:42 | |
No chance, no chance. | 0:28:42 | 0:28:43 | |
Superstar gets her tits out and gets told off by a farmer. | 0:28:43 | 0:28:46 | |
It's kind of not a sexy headline, is it? | 0:28:46 | 0:28:48 | |
# We found love in a hopeless place... # | 0:28:48 | 0:28:53 | |
I don't think shell be losing any sleep about people telling her what she should or shouldn't be doing | 0:28:53 | 0:28:58 | |
and, sadly, I don't think she'll lose much sleep about | 0:28:58 | 0:29:01 | |
being considered an annoying person of 2011. | 0:29:01 | 0:29:03 | |
# Hopeless place... # | 0:29:03 | 0:29:05 | |
At number 41, it's the Sperminator. | 0:29:05 | 0:29:09 | |
Arnold Schwarzenegger has been particularly annoying this year | 0:29:13 | 0:29:17 | |
because we found out that the Terminator wasn't a hero. | 0:29:17 | 0:29:20 | |
In fact, he was a cheat - cheated on his wife, | 0:29:20 | 0:29:23 | |
sired an illegitimate child with his housekeeper. | 0:29:23 | 0:29:27 | |
One expects better from the Kindergarten Cop. | 0:29:27 | 0:29:31 | |
Yes, 2011 was the year that it was revealed that Terminator | 0:29:31 | 0:29:34 | |
had turned sperm donator. | 0:29:34 | 0:29:37 | |
In May, Arnie shocked Hollywood when he announced he was splitting | 0:29:37 | 0:29:40 | |
with his wife, Maria Shriver, after 25 years of marriage. | 0:29:40 | 0:29:43 | |
Now there are so many people that I want to thank, | 0:29:43 | 0:29:47 | |
but I want to start first with my wife Maria. | 0:29:47 | 0:29:50 | |
CHEERING | 0:29:50 | 0:29:52 | |
We then found out the reason for the break-up was that Arnie's missus had got wind of the fact | 0:29:52 | 0:29:57 | |
that her cleaner's son might have a secret dad. | 0:29:57 | 0:30:00 | |
Maria, his wife, suddenly noticed a strange similarity | 0:30:00 | 0:30:04 | |
between the housemaid's son and her husband. | 0:30:04 | 0:30:07 | |
She confronted the housemaid and realised Arnie had been playing away. | 0:30:07 | 0:30:13 | |
(AS SCHWARZENEGGER) And from the cleaner, I had a child. Don't tell anyone. | 0:30:13 | 0:30:17 | |
# Got to love ya Got to love ya... # | 0:30:17 | 0:30:19 | |
My question is, how, physically, do you have sex with Arnold Schwarzenegger? | 0:30:19 | 0:30:27 | |
I mean, the guy is so ripped. | 0:30:27 | 0:30:28 | |
I would imagine, when he ejaculates, it's just going to come | 0:30:28 | 0:30:31 | |
crashing out of the top of your skull, through the headboard, | 0:30:31 | 0:30:35 | |
through the wall and into the living room. | 0:30:35 | 0:30:37 | |
I have a great time doing it. I have a very good physical background. | 0:30:37 | 0:30:41 | |
"I'm going to come." Booff! | 0:30:41 | 0:30:43 | |
The result of Arnie's supersonic secret sexual encounter | 0:30:43 | 0:30:47 | |
was the now-13-year-old Joseph Bueno. | 0:30:47 | 0:30:50 | |
His mother, Patty, had been a cleaner at the Schwarzenegger house for the last, er...13 years! | 0:30:50 | 0:30:56 | |
It might have taken a long time for Maria to work out what had gone on, | 0:30:56 | 0:31:00 | |
but why did it take the former governor of California so long to reveal the truth? | 0:31:00 | 0:31:05 | |
The really annoying thing about all of this is the fact | 0:31:05 | 0:31:08 | |
that he must have known about this for longer, but kept it all quiet | 0:31:08 | 0:31:12 | |
while he was in political office, and that's pretty low, I think. | 0:31:12 | 0:31:16 | |
Old-school Arnie has proven he can keep a secret, | 0:31:18 | 0:31:21 | |
but modern stars have trouble keeping ANYTHING to themselves. | 0:31:21 | 0:31:25 | |
2011 has been the year that even more celebrities have taken to Twitter, | 0:31:25 | 0:31:28 | |
but who knew so many of them would be serving up such dire drivel? | 0:31:28 | 0:31:32 | |
Here, with their very own dodgy spelling and grammar, | 0:31:32 | 0:31:35 | |
are the year's top three tiresome tweeters. | 0:31:35 | 0:31:39 | |
At number three, it's Mel B who irritated us | 0:31:39 | 0:31:42 | |
with this romantic tweet back in June. | 0:31:42 | 0:31:45 | |
I actually got into a huge barney with Mel B this year, | 0:31:51 | 0:31:56 | |
which was quite well documented on Twitter, but actually it was all sparked by this tweet. | 0:31:56 | 0:32:02 | |
A whole load of victims of rape were really disgusted by it. | 0:32:02 | 0:32:05 | |
It was just a ridiculous comment, and she has to be | 0:32:05 | 0:32:09 | |
one of those celebrities who should just be banned from Twitter. | 0:32:09 | 0:32:12 | |
At number two, 50 Cent managed to annoy us | 0:32:12 | 0:32:15 | |
by making light of the horrific tsunami that destroyed parts of Japan in March. | 0:32:15 | 0:32:20 | |
LOL. | 0:32:28 | 0:32:30 | |
If ever there was a time for an LOL, it is | 0:32:30 | 0:32:32 | |
definitely when there is a massive earthquake in Japan. | 0:32:32 | 0:32:36 | |
It's ridiculous. You'd think that somebody like 50 Cent would have somebody | 0:32:36 | 0:32:39 | |
monitoring their tweets. There will be some checks in place, but no. | 0:32:39 | 0:32:45 | |
50's 140-character thoughts might have irritated us this year, | 0:32:45 | 0:32:49 | |
but that's nothing compared to bad-boy footballer, Joey Barton, | 0:32:49 | 0:32:53 | |
a man who has undergone something of a Twitter-aided transformation in 2011. | 0:32:53 | 0:32:58 | |
Joey Barton - footballer by day, | 0:32:58 | 0:33:01 | |
deep-thinking Twitter philosopher by night. | 0:33:01 | 0:33:05 | |
It's like finding out BNP leader Nick Griffin is a reggae DJ in his spare time. | 0:33:05 | 0:33:10 | |
Joey Barton, footballer, a man once famed for stubbing out a lit cigar | 0:33:10 | 0:33:15 | |
in the open eye of one of his disbelieving team-mates | 0:33:15 | 0:33:18 | |
has overcome a kind of cultural intellectual revolution, and become Renaissance man on Twitter. | 0:33:18 | 0:33:25 | |
This year, Joey has developed the habit of quoting writers and philosophers in his tweets. | 0:33:27 | 0:33:31 | |
When he fell out with his old club, Newcastle, in July, he tweeted the following. | 0:33:31 | 0:33:37 | |
I don't really trust Joey Barton's tweets when they're quotes from Orwell. | 0:33:43 | 0:33:46 | |
I get the impression he's getting these quotes off a website. | 0:33:46 | 0:33:49 | |
I don't think he's trawling through Orwell's books, picking out a really meaningful quote. | 0:33:49 | 0:33:53 | |
Maybe the reason we aren't convinced by Joey's literary musings | 0:33:53 | 0:33:57 | |
is because most of his tweets reveal a more basic side to his hashtag philosophy. | 0:33:57 | 0:34:02 | |
He gets criticised once on Match Of The Day | 0:34:02 | 0:34:04 | |
and he has a go at Alan Shearer's hairline and his shirt. | 0:34:04 | 0:34:08 | |
He showed that he was actually, at heart, a real philosopher. | 0:34:13 | 0:34:16 | |
Jean Paul Sartre would be proud today. | 0:34:16 | 0:34:19 | |
Next, a social media slip-up that led to career suicide. | 0:34:19 | 0:34:24 | |
What would this show be without a politician embroiled in a sex scandal? | 0:34:24 | 0:34:29 | |
I did not have sexual relations with that woman. | 0:34:29 | 0:34:34 | |
You may not recognise his face, but millions now recognise his crotch. | 0:34:34 | 0:34:39 | |
Oh, Anthony Weiner. | 0:34:39 | 0:34:41 | |
Anthony Weiner is the penis guy. | 0:34:41 | 0:34:43 | |
We didn't know Anthony Weiner at all until he did this. | 0:34:43 | 0:34:46 | |
Congressman Anthony Weiner was immediately caught | 0:34:46 | 0:34:49 | |
after he tweeted a picture of his penis to a girl. | 0:34:49 | 0:34:52 | |
He thought he was sending a picture of his penis | 0:34:52 | 0:34:54 | |
to one particular woman, but he sent it to everyone who followed him. | 0:34:54 | 0:34:58 | |
It's kind of like when you hit "reply all", basically. | 0:34:58 | 0:35:00 | |
It's a classic mistake for penis showers. | 0:35:00 | 0:35:03 | |
This year's big political cock-up involved a man | 0:35:06 | 0:35:10 | |
previously little known in the UK, Anthony Weiner, | 0:35:10 | 0:35:13 | |
the honourable member for New York's Ninth Congressional District. | 0:35:13 | 0:35:17 | |
The gentleman is providing cover for his colleagues, rather than doing the right thing. | 0:35:17 | 0:35:21 | |
Republican blogger Andrew Breitbart, having discovered the tweeted pictures, | 0:35:21 | 0:35:26 | |
posted them online, and soon Weiner was dish of the day. | 0:35:26 | 0:35:30 | |
He showed his wiener and his name is Weiner. How ironic. | 0:35:30 | 0:35:38 | |
You should have seen the New York headlines. | 0:35:38 | 0:35:40 | |
The New York Post - "Weiner Pulls Out." | 0:35:40 | 0:35:42 | |
The New York Times - "Weiner Gets Grilled." | 0:35:42 | 0:35:44 | |
I mean, you couldn't make it up. | 0:35:44 | 0:35:48 | |
"Obama beats Weiner." You know what they're suggesting there. | 0:35:48 | 0:35:54 | |
# Don't wanna be an American idiot... # | 0:35:54 | 0:35:57 | |
Weiner denied the tweeted crotch was his, and claimed his account had been hacked. | 0:35:57 | 0:36:02 | |
The problem with Anthony Weiner was he handled it the wrong way. | 0:36:02 | 0:36:06 | |
-Not his wiener. -Not his wiener. His wiener was fine. | 0:36:06 | 0:36:09 | |
-He handled that well. -And it was a little small. | 0:36:09 | 0:36:12 | |
I didn't send the photograph. That was... This hacker did. | 0:36:12 | 0:36:15 | |
I didn't send it to the woman in question. | 0:36:15 | 0:36:18 | |
She didn't get it. She's made a statement to that effect. | 0:36:18 | 0:36:21 | |
I saw it immediately, took it down. | 0:36:21 | 0:36:24 | |
And then by the next weekend, his wife was ready to leave him | 0:36:24 | 0:36:27 | |
and it was him and then another picture had leaked where | 0:36:27 | 0:36:29 | |
we had actually seen even more of his wiener. | 0:36:29 | 0:36:31 | |
I just loved how quickly his arrogance turned on a dime. | 0:36:35 | 0:36:39 | |
He's just categorically like, "How dare you? | 0:36:39 | 0:36:41 | |
"How dare you imply that I would do something like that to... | 0:36:41 | 0:36:45 | |
"Yeah, that was my dick. I'm sorry." | 0:36:45 | 0:36:47 | |
Last Friday night, I tweeted a photograph of myself that I intended | 0:36:47 | 0:36:50 | |
to send as a direct message as part of a joke to a woman in Seattle. | 0:36:50 | 0:36:54 | |
Once I realised I had posted it to Twitter, I panicked, | 0:36:54 | 0:36:57 | |
I took it down and said that I had been hacked. | 0:36:57 | 0:36:59 | |
He apologised at an old folk's home, which was great because I'm sure they were like, | 0:36:59 | 0:37:03 | |
"What does tweeting his penis mean? I think I might do that every night accidentally." | 0:37:03 | 0:37:08 | |
I brought pain to people I care about the most, and people who believed in me. | 0:37:08 | 0:37:13 | |
Weiner was forced to quit, and face the wrath of pregnant wife, Huma Abedin. | 0:37:13 | 0:37:18 | |
The happy couple are expecting their first child in December, | 0:37:18 | 0:37:22 | |
hopefully in time to buy him this year's must-have toy. | 0:37:22 | 0:37:25 | |
There is an Anthony Weiner doll out. | 0:37:25 | 0:37:29 | |
It's sort of like Pinocchio, only the part that grows is lower. | 0:37:29 | 0:37:34 | |
"Hey, there's a girl!" Who-o-o-op! | 0:37:34 | 0:37:37 | |
"Hey, I got caught!" Who-o-o-o. | 0:37:37 | 0:37:39 | |
Overstaying its welcome at 39 | 0:37:40 | 0:37:44 | |
is the technology we've all gotten very tired of - | 0:37:44 | 0:37:47 | |
3D. | 0:37:47 | 0:37:50 | |
-3D is shit. -3D, yeah, it's just a joke. | 0:37:50 | 0:37:54 | |
I think unless you're a techie nerd, | 0:37:54 | 0:37:56 | |
I'm just not that interested in 3D stuff. | 0:37:56 | 0:37:58 | |
Yes, in 2011, the thrill of paying over the odds | 0:37:58 | 0:38:02 | |
to look like an idiot at a 3D movie has grown increasingly annoying. | 0:38:02 | 0:38:07 | |
It is absolutely pointless. | 0:38:07 | 0:38:08 | |
What is the reasoning behind having a film in 3D? | 0:38:08 | 0:38:12 | |
I did see Harry Potter in 3D. I was told that that was a must. | 0:38:12 | 0:38:16 | |
And it's great, it's cool, | 0:38:16 | 0:38:19 | |
but it doesn't really add to my enjoyment of the film. | 0:38:19 | 0:38:22 | |
I think I would have enjoyed the film anyway. | 0:38:22 | 0:38:25 | |
It was good in the '80s, when you had Jaws and the glasses for free | 0:38:25 | 0:38:28 | |
and Jaws was in 3D. It was brilliant, that was. | 0:38:28 | 0:38:31 | |
But now they've got 3D this, 3D that. | 0:38:31 | 0:38:33 | |
Not content with pushing overpriced movie tickets, | 0:38:33 | 0:38:36 | |
the men in suits are now pushing 3D into your living room. | 0:38:36 | 0:38:40 | |
I think the 3D TVs are definitely for the techie show-offs that want the next thing. | 0:38:41 | 0:38:45 | |
But I think the joke's on them now, because it's not really kicked off and they just look like geeks. | 0:38:45 | 0:38:51 | |
But if watching puppies and footballers in stupid glasses | 0:38:51 | 0:38:55 | |
wasn't annoying enough, back in March, thousands of twitching techies | 0:38:55 | 0:38:59 | |
joined the bandwagon to purchase the all-new Nintendo 3DS. | 0:38:59 | 0:39:04 | |
The world-famous console was, this time, in 3D. | 0:39:04 | 0:39:07 | |
You didn't need glasses, but you did need £250 and no shame. | 0:39:07 | 0:39:11 | |
It's a fad. It's a very expensive fad. It's not going to last. | 0:39:12 | 0:39:16 | |
And it was a shame for Nintendo. | 0:39:16 | 0:39:18 | |
It appeared that 3D wasn't what the techies wanted either. | 0:39:18 | 0:39:21 | |
Sales - as well as the price of their new console - plummeted | 0:39:21 | 0:39:25 | |
and the company reported a loss for the first time in years. | 0:39:25 | 0:39:28 | |
I don't know. I don't think it's really necessary | 0:39:28 | 0:39:31 | |
to have a little dog in the screen that's paw can come up slightly towards you. | 0:39:31 | 0:39:35 | |
I don't really understand that. Doesn't really do it for me. | 0:39:35 | 0:39:39 | |
Breaking a sweat at 38, | 0:39:39 | 0:39:41 | |
it's a form of exercise that's been growing like wildfire in 2011. | 0:39:41 | 0:39:46 | |
-Zumba. -Zumba. Zumba. | 0:39:46 | 0:39:49 | |
# Cha-de-de-de-de. # | 0:39:49 | 0:39:51 | |
Zumba has got it going on. | 0:39:51 | 0:39:53 | |
Can you actually tell the difference whether someone is Zumba-ing or they're being Tasered? | 0:39:54 | 0:39:59 | |
It's just somebody doing this. Zumba, Zumba, Zumba. | 0:39:59 | 0:40:04 | |
Zumba. I charge four quid for that. | 0:40:04 | 0:40:07 | |
Created by one Beto Perez, Zumba classes are a bizarre clash | 0:40:07 | 0:40:11 | |
of '80s aerobics... | 0:40:11 | 0:40:13 | |
# Let's get physical... # | 0:40:13 | 0:40:15 | |
..and '90s Macarena. | 0:40:15 | 0:40:17 | |
# Hey, Macarena! # | 0:40:17 | 0:40:18 | |
And, in 2011, it has been turning women across the globe into Zumba zealots. | 0:40:18 | 0:40:24 | |
Please stop for your own benefit because if you've got kids, | 0:40:24 | 0:40:27 | |
when they grow up, they've got to put up with looking you in the eye. | 0:40:27 | 0:40:31 | |
# One, two, three, four Uno, dos, tres... # | 0:40:31 | 0:40:33 | |
These Zumba zombies have been trying to get everyone addicted | 0:40:33 | 0:40:37 | |
to its annoying mix of Latin and Lycra. | 0:40:37 | 0:40:39 | |
# You know I want ya I know you want me... # | 0:40:39 | 0:40:41 | |
Zumba is a great cardio workout. You get great legs. | 0:40:41 | 0:40:45 | |
You get a toned stomach because you're constantly, | 0:40:45 | 0:40:48 | |
gyrating, rotating, shaking. | 0:40:48 | 0:40:50 | |
There's three types of people in this world - | 0:40:50 | 0:40:53 | |
people who don't bother doing exercise, | 0:40:53 | 0:40:55 | |
people who do exercise, or people who think | 0:40:55 | 0:40:58 | |
finding some sort of gimmicky thing that's either on a DVD or goes on in a local church hall | 0:40:58 | 0:41:03 | |
on a Wednesday will somehow make you ultimately fit and healthy. | 0:41:03 | 0:41:06 | |
Instead of having a Ryvita, which is really boring, | 0:41:06 | 0:41:08 | |
you can be sexy, Zumba away, and look fit. It's perfect. | 0:41:08 | 0:41:12 | |
"Darren's teaching you all Zumba this week. It's going to be great. | 0:41:12 | 0:41:15 | |
"You're all going to lose that fat off your arses." | 0:41:15 | 0:41:18 | |
You're not, because you'll go home, watch the Coronation Street omnibus and have 15 packets of biscuits. | 0:41:18 | 0:41:24 | |
I think that people who don't like Zumba | 0:41:26 | 0:41:28 | |
and who are annoyed by it are probably intimidated by it, | 0:41:28 | 0:41:31 | |
because I think it takes a tremendous amount of courage to go out there | 0:41:31 | 0:41:35 | |
and really move your body in a sexual way in front of everyone. | 0:41:35 | 0:41:38 | |
I think if the men actually went to Zumba, | 0:41:38 | 0:41:40 | |
they'd probably enjoy it, because there are a lot of ladies jiggling around in not many clothes. | 0:41:40 | 0:41:47 | |
# Let's get loud... # | 0:41:47 | 0:41:48 | |
The zest for Zumba reached a peak earlier this year | 0:41:48 | 0:41:52 | |
when an army of 3,500 fitness fans Zumba-ed en masse in London. | 0:41:52 | 0:41:56 | |
It was for charity, which was good, but its deadly spell | 0:41:56 | 0:41:59 | |
hooked a host of celebrities into its sweaty clutches. | 0:41:59 | 0:42:03 | |
It's like a secret society, slowing building up the numbers | 0:42:03 | 0:42:06 | |
until, one day, Zumba will take over the world | 0:42:06 | 0:42:08 | |
and everybody is going to be bloody Zumba-ing. Well, I won't be. | 0:42:08 | 0:42:12 | |
I'll be on top of that clock tower with a rifle picking them all off one by one because I hate it. | 0:42:12 | 0:42:16 | |
I hate Zumba. | 0:42:16 | 0:42:18 | |
Rolling in at 37, some travellers went off-road | 0:42:20 | 0:42:23 | |
and right onto our TV screens, making Gypsy Weddings the surprise water-cooler topic of the year. | 0:42:23 | 0:42:30 | |
# Gypsies, tramps and thieves... # | 0:42:30 | 0:42:33 | |
It's built their reputation that they're weird, fantastical beings | 0:42:33 | 0:42:37 | |
that have these elaborate weddings and live under bridges. | 0:42:37 | 0:42:40 | |
# Gypsies, tramps and thieves... # | 0:42:40 | 0:42:44 | |
I reckon Katie Price is gutted, absolutely gutted. | 0:42:44 | 0:42:47 | |
There she was thinking, "No-one can outdo me | 0:42:47 | 0:42:50 | |
"when it comes to weddings and tackiness", and then these gypsies | 0:42:50 | 0:42:53 | |
come along with their huge dresses and cakes the size of a room. | 0:42:53 | 0:42:57 | |
She's livid. | 0:42:57 | 0:42:59 | |
# L-I-F-E G-O-E-S O-N | 0:42:59 | 0:43:02 | |
# You've got more than money and sense, my friend... # | 0:43:02 | 0:43:05 | |
Any culture that spends more time making an elaborate wedding dress | 0:43:05 | 0:43:08 | |
than they do building foundations for an actual house, is fine by me. They're amazing people. | 0:43:08 | 0:43:13 | |
# What you don't have now will come back again... # | 0:43:13 | 0:43:16 | |
Forget fake '80s shoulder pads, we're talking killer kitsch here. | 0:43:16 | 0:43:20 | |
And what some viewers struggled with were the freakish fairytale dresses | 0:43:20 | 0:43:24 | |
the gypsy brides wore for their big day. | 0:43:24 | 0:43:28 | |
Have you seen these dresses? I mean, they have their own postcode. | 0:43:28 | 0:43:32 | |
Hello? | 0:43:32 | 0:43:33 | |
You just want something that's kind of feminine, elegant, | 0:43:33 | 0:43:37 | |
comfortable. Theirs were none of these things. | 0:43:37 | 0:43:41 | |
I've had a lot of people say to me, | 0:43:41 | 0:43:43 | |
"Don't you go overboard with your children?" | 0:43:43 | 0:43:45 | |
And you've got to tell them, "I give my child what she wants." | 0:43:45 | 0:43:49 | |
Listen, your child is born, it's a Christening you're going to give her, | 0:43:49 | 0:43:53 | |
Holy Communion you're going to give her, a Confirmation you're going to give her, and a wedding. | 0:43:53 | 0:43:58 | |
There's only four things you have to give her that are major. | 0:43:58 | 0:44:01 | |
# Goin' to the chapel... # | 0:44:01 | 0:44:03 | |
Gypsy go-to dressmaker Thelma Madine provided most of the crinoline creations we were all talking about. | 0:44:03 | 0:44:09 | |
Every one of these girls are really young | 0:44:09 | 0:44:11 | |
and it's like a fairytale wedding is what they want, | 0:44:11 | 0:44:15 | |
and they actually bring us videos of Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty. | 0:44:15 | 0:44:20 | |
They want this type of dream wedding dress. | 0:44:20 | 0:44:23 | |
They want it big and special. | 0:44:23 | 0:44:26 | |
They could barely walk in them, and that itself was really unattractive. | 0:44:27 | 0:44:31 | |
They're kind of walking like a cowboy down the aisle. | 0:44:31 | 0:44:34 | |
We actually tell them, so it comes with a warning sign | 0:44:36 | 0:44:40 | |
that your hips will be cut and bruised and you will be in pain. | 0:44:40 | 0:44:45 | |
It doesn't seem to put them off. That's what they want. | 0:44:45 | 0:44:48 | |
# Today's the day... # | 0:44:48 | 0:44:51 | |
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think you should actually be | 0:44:51 | 0:44:54 | |
paralysed by your own wedding dress. | 0:44:54 | 0:44:56 | |
When you see people with bleeding lesions because their dress | 0:44:56 | 0:44:59 | |
is actually so heavy, I think there's something a bit wrong about that. | 0:44:59 | 0:45:03 | |
It's supposed to be the happiest day of your life. | 0:45:03 | 0:45:05 | |
Has to wear trainers. That's a joke, isn't it? | 0:45:05 | 0:45:09 | |
You give them a large sum of money, and she's wearing trainers. | 0:45:09 | 0:45:13 | |
She needs to balance, | 0:45:13 | 0:45:15 | |
and with a heel that big you won't keep your balance. | 0:45:15 | 0:45:17 | |
If your daughter wants to be a princess, I'll make her a princess. | 0:45:17 | 0:45:21 | |
Slipping in at 36, there's even more wedding-related irritation. | 0:45:25 | 0:45:29 | |
Remember this? For most of us, it was a great moment - | 0:45:31 | 0:45:34 | |
we found out we'd be getting an extra day off work. | 0:45:34 | 0:45:37 | |
But for artist Jennifer Rubell, | 0:45:37 | 0:45:39 | |
it was the inspiration to create 2011's most annoying bit of art. | 0:45:39 | 0:45:44 | |
The chance to play Princess Kate to your very own wax Wills. | 0:45:44 | 0:45:48 | |
# You make me feel like | 0:45:48 | 0:45:51 | |
# I'm living a teenage dream | 0:45:51 | 0:45:54 | |
# The way you turn me on... # | 0:45:54 | 0:45:56 | |
The thought occurred to me it would be fun to be her going in | 0:45:56 | 0:46:00 | |
and putting my arm in and being the one with the ring on and I think it's a feeling a lot of women have | 0:46:00 | 0:46:06 | |
of this fantasy of meeting Prince Charming and he asks you | 0:46:06 | 0:46:11 | |
to marry him, and you're at the palace making your announcement. | 0:46:11 | 0:46:14 | |
Unlike you though, Jennifer, marrying William isn't every girl's dream. | 0:46:14 | 0:46:18 | |
It's assuming you would WANT to feel like a princess, as if you're kind of a six-year old girl that still | 0:46:18 | 0:46:23 | |
dresses in Woolworths Ladybird collection. It's a bit weird, isn't it? | 0:46:23 | 0:46:26 | |
The waxwork didn't really look like Prince William. | 0:46:26 | 0:46:29 | |
If something that looked like that proposed to me, I would have to say no anyway. | 0:46:29 | 0:46:34 | |
His nose is all funny. I wouldn't want to marry him. | 0:46:34 | 0:46:37 | |
Jennifer's...creation was on show for four weeks at a private London gallery, | 0:46:37 | 0:46:43 | |
but not everyone has been convinced of its artistic merits. | 0:46:43 | 0:46:45 | |
She's called it Engagement. She was going to call it Wills Pops The Question | 0:46:45 | 0:46:49 | |
but she didn't want to baffle people with layers of metaphor. | 0:46:49 | 0:46:52 | |
I found it quite annoying that it was called art. | 0:46:52 | 0:46:55 | |
Does it belong in the art gallery or does it belong at the end of Brighton Pier? | 0:46:58 | 0:47:02 | |
Part of occupying that moment is how you feel, because you slide your finger through | 0:47:02 | 0:47:06 | |
and you have this feeling of kind of like, "I'm a princess". | 0:47:06 | 0:47:09 | |
My only regret is that I didn't get to go in person | 0:47:09 | 0:47:13 | |
because I've always harboured a somewhat fanciful dream | 0:47:13 | 0:47:16 | |
of slipping my finger up Kate Middleton's ring. | 0:47:16 | 0:47:19 | |
If nothing else, Jennifer's tribute to Wills and Kate allowed art lovers and tourists the chance | 0:47:19 | 0:47:24 | |
to save some serious money on a ticket to Madame Tussauds. | 0:47:24 | 0:47:27 | |
Oh, my God. Oh, my God, is that Prince William? Oh, my God, I thought it was real! | 0:47:27 | 0:47:31 | |
I thought it was real for a minute. Ah, my God. Ah, he's fit. | 0:47:31 | 0:47:34 | |
Can I actually pose with him? Can I pose with Prince William? | 0:47:34 | 0:47:37 | |
Guess what pose I'm going to do. It's going to be disgusting. | 0:47:37 | 0:47:41 | |
At 35, what a load of old plankers. | 0:47:41 | 0:47:43 | |
Originally known as the dead man, in 2011 planking has become | 0:47:49 | 0:47:54 | |
an internet sensation with plankers all over the world. | 0:47:54 | 0:47:58 | |
Planking is basically lying down. | 0:47:58 | 0:48:01 | |
Most people can lie down quite easily, | 0:48:04 | 0:48:07 | |
but now they've given it a different name, it's suddenly cool. | 0:48:07 | 0:48:10 | |
# You better believe I'll stand my ground, boy | 0:48:10 | 0:48:13 | |
# I won't take it lying down... # | 0:48:13 | 0:48:16 | |
How dull do you have to be | 0:48:17 | 0:48:19 | |
if posing as a piece of wood | 0:48:19 | 0:48:23 | |
makes you more exciting? | 0:48:23 | 0:48:24 | |
To me, planking is the worst extreme sport there is. It's lazy. | 0:48:25 | 0:48:30 | |
It's basically one of those things that inspires | 0:48:30 | 0:48:33 | |
the biggest idiots and dickheads in the world | 0:48:33 | 0:48:37 | |
to think they're doing something crazy. | 0:48:37 | 0:48:39 | |
"Hey, guess what I did last night? Some serious planking." | 0:48:39 | 0:48:42 | |
Didn't you lay down? That's all you actually did. | 0:48:42 | 0:48:44 | |
I did a plank on a post box. That's right. Postman Plank. | 0:48:44 | 0:48:48 | |
That's me. | 0:48:49 | 0:48:51 | |
It just came to me like an epiphany. | 0:48:51 | 0:48:53 | |
I've never, ever planked before but I thought, | 0:48:53 | 0:48:56 | |
let me make my first plank an epic one. | 0:48:56 | 0:48:58 | |
And what more epic can you get than a Grand Canyon, | 0:48:58 | 0:49:01 | |
a big hole in the world? And it got set up. | 0:49:01 | 0:49:03 | |
I put it on Twitter. I put it on Facebook. | 0:49:03 | 0:49:05 | |
I got 200 likes and that's what I live for. | 0:49:05 | 0:49:08 | |
I live for the likes. | 0:49:08 | 0:49:09 | |
I don't understand it. | 0:49:10 | 0:49:12 | |
It makes me feel slightly nervous | 0:49:12 | 0:49:15 | |
because what's no-one thinking of? Health and safety. | 0:49:15 | 0:49:18 | |
Planking is the start of an episode of Casualty, isn't it? | 0:49:18 | 0:49:21 | |
Are they thinking about the consequences, | 0:49:21 | 0:49:23 | |
about my tax money paying for their injuries? They're not, are they? | 0:49:23 | 0:49:27 | |
Be warned, viewers - planking can be fatal. | 0:49:29 | 0:49:32 | |
It cost 20-year-old Acton Beale his life when he fell from | 0:49:32 | 0:49:35 | |
a balcony of a block of flats in Brisbane after he tried to plank on some railings. | 0:49:35 | 0:49:41 | |
Do it over some sort of soft cushioning. | 0:49:41 | 0:49:44 | |
Do it over Rihanna. | 0:49:44 | 0:49:46 | |
Planking has spawned a host of other "ings", all with one thing in common - | 0:49:50 | 0:49:57 | |
they're annoy-ING. | 0:49:58 | 0:50:00 | |
# Batman... # | 0:50:00 | 0:50:01 | |
Batmanning, to me, yeah, there's a little bit of skill there. | 0:50:01 | 0:50:04 | |
That is the sort of thing that's not high-end, | 0:50:04 | 0:50:07 | |
it's not David Copperfield, but still there's something to it. | 0:50:07 | 0:50:11 | |
I don't know where this could go. It literally could go anywhere, couldn't it, you know? | 0:50:11 | 0:50:16 | |
We've gone on from the planking and moved onto the owling. | 0:50:16 | 0:50:19 | |
You know what? As far as all the "ings" go - planking, saluting, shagging - | 0:50:22 | 0:50:26 | |
they're all going to be fun. None of them will ever be as popular as wanking. | 0:50:26 | 0:50:30 | |
# Batman... # | 0:50:30 | 0:50:34 | |
Batmanning. Extreme sport. | 0:50:34 | 0:50:38 | |
Now for some infuriating fruit. | 0:50:38 | 0:50:41 | |
Hey, Apple. Hey, Apple. | 0:50:41 | 0:50:44 | |
Hey, Apple. | 0:50:44 | 0:50:45 | |
Hey, Apple, Apple, hey. | 0:50:45 | 0:50:47 | |
Hey, Apple. | 0:50:47 | 0:50:49 | |
What? What? What is it? | 0:50:49 | 0:50:50 | |
Orange you glad I didn't say "Apple" again? Ha-ha-ha! | 0:50:50 | 0:50:53 | |
Annoying, isn't it? | 0:50:53 | 0:50:54 | |
Ble, ble, ble, ble. | 0:50:54 | 0:50:56 | |
# Got my orange crush... # | 0:50:56 | 0:50:58 | |
This cackling citrus has taken the pith. | 0:50:58 | 0:51:01 | |
Tediously tango-ing us to new levels of vexation | 0:51:01 | 0:51:05 | |
via his own YouTube channel. | 0:51:05 | 0:51:07 | |
-Wow, you really are an apple. -I am not. | 0:51:07 | 0:51:11 | |
Hey, hey, Apple. Ha-ha-ha! | 0:51:11 | 0:51:14 | |
Annoying Orange is exactly as it's described. It's extremely annoying. | 0:51:14 | 0:51:19 | |
OK, gotta take this. Hold on. | 0:51:19 | 0:51:22 | |
You've got the cob. | 0:51:22 | 0:51:24 | |
-Ble-ble... -Knock it off! -Ha-ha-ha! | 0:51:24 | 0:51:28 | |
I had been doing YouTube for a really long time | 0:51:28 | 0:51:30 | |
and did these short one-off videos and I've done a lot of talking-food videos before as well | 0:51:30 | 0:51:35 | |
and one night the idea popped in my head. | 0:51:35 | 0:51:38 | |
Hey, let's do another one of those talking-food videos. | 0:51:38 | 0:51:41 | |
And I uploaded it. | 0:51:41 | 0:51:42 | |
-Hey, Apple. -What? -You look fruity. | 0:51:42 | 0:51:44 | |
Ha-ha-ha! | 0:51:44 | 0:51:46 | |
A couple of days later, it hit close to a million hits | 0:51:46 | 0:51:50 | |
and I was like, wow, this is crazy. And from then I just kept getting more and more e-mails from fans | 0:51:50 | 0:51:55 | |
saying, "Hey, you should make another one". So I made another one. | 0:51:55 | 0:51:58 | |
That one, in a couple of days, got a million hits and just from there, I just kept getting more and more | 0:51:58 | 0:52:03 | |
and more fan mail saying, "Make more, make more!" | 0:52:03 | 0:52:05 | |
For crying out loud, would you stop yabbering for longer than three seconds? I can't hear myself think! | 0:52:05 | 0:52:10 | |
'But since then, I've been making a new episode every Friday.' | 0:52:10 | 0:52:14 | |
He has over two million subscribers on YouTube, | 0:52:14 | 0:52:17 | |
9.5 million fans on Facebook and over 250,000 Twitter followers. | 0:52:17 | 0:52:22 | |
-Yello? -Whassup? -What's up? | 0:52:22 | 0:52:24 | |
-What's up? -Err... -Aaargh... | 0:52:24 | 0:52:27 | |
-ARGH! -Errr... | 0:52:27 | 0:52:28 | |
-Ahhh! -Ahhh! -Ahhh! | 0:52:28 | 0:52:30 | |
-ARGH! -Ohhh! -Ohh! | 0:52:30 | 0:52:32 | |
ARGH! | 0:52:32 | 0:52:34 | |
I have sat through crazy frogs and fuzzy things | 0:52:34 | 0:52:39 | |
and shouty puppets and S Club 7. | 0:52:39 | 0:52:42 | |
I am willing to go with The Annoying Orange. So it's good. | 0:52:42 | 0:52:46 | |
You stick a face on stuff, it's funny. | 0:52:46 | 0:52:48 | |
-Hey, Apple. -What? -Can you do this? | 0:52:48 | 0:52:51 | |
-Ne ne ne ne... -No. -..ne ne ne ne ne! | 0:52:51 | 0:52:55 | |
I love the whole thing. The ne ne ne ne. | 0:52:55 | 0:52:57 | |
-Ne ne ne ne ne ne! -Ne ne ne ne... | 0:52:57 | 0:53:01 | |
-Shut up! -Ha-ha-ha. | 0:53:01 | 0:53:03 | |
That's what you did when you were four years old and it's still funny. | 0:53:03 | 0:53:06 | |
Ne ne ne ne. | 0:53:06 | 0:53:07 | |
OK, you've made your point. Stop it. | 0:53:07 | 0:53:10 | |
I don't mind animals being able to speak in cartoons, | 0:53:13 | 0:53:16 | |
but, you know, an orange being able to speak? | 0:53:16 | 0:53:19 | |
-Ah, God, you are so irritating. -I'm not irritating. I'm an orange. | 0:53:19 | 0:53:24 | |
-Hey, Apple. -I'm not talking to you. | 0:53:24 | 0:53:27 | |
He just doesn't stop. He just constantly goes and goes and goes and goes. | 0:53:27 | 0:53:31 | |
Yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam, yam! | 0:53:31 | 0:53:35 | |
What?! | 0:53:35 | 0:53:37 | |
-Knife. -ARGH! | 0:53:37 | 0:53:39 | |
Whoa! | 0:53:39 | 0:53:40 | |
I've created a monster. | 0:53:40 | 0:53:42 | |
Ble, ble, ble, ble... | 0:53:43 | 0:53:46 | |
Would you please be quiet?! | 0:53:46 | 0:53:47 | |
I felt thrilled when you guys approached me about Orange being on the list. | 0:53:49 | 0:53:53 | |
-What? What list? -If there's anyone that Annoying Orange is in competition with | 0:53:53 | 0:53:57 | |
for most annoying, it's probably Charlie Sheen. | 0:53:57 | 0:54:00 | |
Hey, hey, Charlie. You can't beat me! You can't even beat an egg. Ha-ha-ha! | 0:54:00 | 0:54:06 | |
He did a lot in 2011. He had quite the year, and I would like to say that Orange | 0:54:06 | 0:54:11 | |
was more annoying than Charlie Sheen... | 0:54:11 | 0:54:14 | |
Hey, I'm not annoying. | 0:54:14 | 0:54:16 | |
-..but I don't know if that's possible. -Ble, ble, ble, na, na, na! | 0:54:16 | 0:54:21 | |
At 33, we're experiencing a sense of deja vu. | 0:54:21 | 0:54:25 | |
This time last year, one of 2010's most annoying people was this clown. | 0:54:25 | 0:54:31 | |
Our burning of the Koran is to call the attention that something's wrong. | 0:54:31 | 0:54:36 | |
US pastor Terry Jones had the delightful idea of burning copies of the Islamic holy book, | 0:54:36 | 0:54:42 | |
the Koran, as a way of marking the anniversary of 9/11. | 0:54:42 | 0:54:45 | |
Guess what? This year we've been irritated by yet another potty pastor | 0:54:45 | 0:54:49 | |
with a fondness for predicting the end of the world. | 0:54:49 | 0:54:52 | |
According to Harold Camping, a religious broadcaster in California, tomorrow is Judgment Day, | 0:54:52 | 0:54:57 | |
when true believers are sent to Heaven and the rest of us are left behind to suffer the Apocalypse. | 0:54:57 | 0:55:02 | |
He's said it before and he did it this year. | 0:55:02 | 0:55:04 | |
He said that the world was going to end on May 21st. | 0:55:04 | 0:55:07 | |
There is just no reason in the world, no possibility that it will not happen. | 0:55:07 | 0:55:13 | |
Harold Camping based his bold prediction on calculations he had made using the Bible. | 0:55:13 | 0:55:18 | |
Amazingly, many Americans even bought it. | 0:55:18 | 0:55:21 | |
A lot of people are hardcore believers in Christianity in this country, | 0:55:21 | 0:55:25 | |
and they will believe whatever a pastor or a priest tells them. | 0:55:25 | 0:55:29 | |
There were big billboards everywhere, people handing out fliers. | 0:55:33 | 0:55:36 | |
So it's this huge deal. People went to Times Square on the day | 0:55:36 | 0:55:40 | |
waiting with their bags packed. Why would you bring anything to Heaven? I'm sure it'll all be there for you. | 0:55:40 | 0:55:45 | |
# This is the end... # | 0:55:45 | 0:55:49 | |
With Harold predicting Armageddon at 6pm on May 21st, | 0:55:49 | 0:55:53 | |
crowds gathered across America to see what would happen. | 0:55:53 | 0:55:57 | |
CLOCK CHIMES | 0:55:57 | 0:56:00 | |
The end of the world! Warn the people! | 0:56:00 | 0:56:04 | |
Guess what? You're not going to believe this. It turned out he was wrong. | 0:56:04 | 0:56:07 | |
# It's the end of the world as we know it... # | 0:56:07 | 0:56:10 | |
Judgment day is cancelled! Yay! | 0:56:10 | 0:56:12 | |
Thank God for that! | 0:56:12 | 0:56:14 | |
It all left Harold's poor old believers a bit confused though. | 0:56:14 | 0:56:18 | |
Well, obviously I hadn't understood it correctly, because we're still here. | 0:56:18 | 0:56:23 | |
So, how do you explain that then, Harold? | 0:56:23 | 0:56:26 | |
I'm not embarrassed about it. It's just the fact that it was... | 0:56:26 | 0:56:30 | |
It was...premature. | 0:56:30 | 0:56:32 | |
Everyone in the world knew that he thought the world was going to end | 0:56:32 | 0:56:36 | |
and then it didn't, making him the biggest fool of the entire world. | 0:56:36 | 0:56:42 | |
Obviously, predicting the end of the world must be a tricky business. | 0:56:42 | 0:56:46 | |
But for Harold, it's a business which is also very lucrative. | 0:56:46 | 0:56:50 | |
A recent audit of his organisation, Family Radio, | 0:56:50 | 0:56:53 | |
valued it at 72 million with most of its income coming from donations. | 0:56:53 | 0:56:58 | |
All the people who follow his church or listen to his radio programme freaked out. So what did they do? | 0:56:58 | 0:57:04 | |
They took all of their life savings and they donated it to him. | 0:57:04 | 0:57:07 | |
When the world didn't come to an end, Harold Camping didn't give them the money back. | 0:57:07 | 0:57:12 | |
Just... "Ah, did I... Did I say today? | 0:57:12 | 0:57:16 | |
"I meant next year, sorry, sorry. There was my watch. | 0:57:16 | 0:57:19 | |
"It's... Oh, I need to get a new one. | 0:57:19 | 0:57:22 | |
"Thankfully, you all donated your money to me so I'm going to get a Rolex." | 0:57:22 | 0:57:25 | |
The world literally does come crashing around us now | 0:57:25 | 0:57:29 | |
to the tunes of 2011's most annoying pop and our top five most maddening music. | 0:57:29 | 0:57:34 | |
# Every day I'm shufflin'... # | 0:57:38 | 0:57:40 | |
In at number five it's LMFAO, the American duo | 0:57:40 | 0:57:44 | |
with the amazing pop pedigree, but terrifically annoying tunes. | 0:57:44 | 0:57:49 | |
What's really depressing about that, is that one of the band members is the son of Berry Gordy. | 0:57:49 | 0:57:55 | |
Berry Gordy who set up Motown, one of the most influential | 0:57:55 | 0:57:59 | |
and important record labels of the 20th Century | 0:57:59 | 0:58:02 | |
and the fact that his son is doing the Party Rock Anthem, | 0:58:02 | 0:58:07 | |
when he could be making important soul music for the next generation, is just really depressing. | 0:58:07 | 0:58:14 | |
At four, we're playing a game of spot the difference. | 0:58:18 | 0:58:20 | |
The Wanted made it big this year. | 0:58:20 | 0:58:23 | |
# You cast a spell on me Spell on me... # | 0:58:23 | 0:58:25 | |
There they are, doing their thing, | 0:58:25 | 0:58:27 | |
doing proper standard boy band videos out on beaches. | 0:58:27 | 0:58:30 | |
Aren't they pretty? Wonderful. And then we get One Direction... | 0:58:30 | 0:58:34 | |
# So c-come on | 0:58:34 | 0:58:37 | |
# You got it wrong... # | 0:58:37 | 0:58:39 | |
Which seemed to be like a Mini Me version of The Wanted | 0:58:39 | 0:58:42 | |
with an identical video, just with slightly younger people in it. | 0:58:42 | 0:58:46 | |
Come on, guys, can't you be a bit more original? | 0:58:46 | 0:58:48 | |
# I look into your e-e-e-eyes... # | 0:58:48 | 0:58:51 | |
# La, la-la-la-la La-la, la-la, la-la-la-la, la... # | 0:58:51 | 0:58:54 | |
At number three, it's J Lo with the dodgiest sample of the year. | 0:58:54 | 0:58:58 | |
-Anyone for the Lambada? -You can't really have the sample of forbidden dance - | 0:58:58 | 0:59:02 | |
the Lambada - in your track. There's a reason why it's forbidden. | 0:59:02 | 0:59:08 | |
That high, whiney vocal. # Da na na na ne... # | 0:59:08 | 0:59:11 | |
That's just like nails on a chalk board. | 0:59:11 | 0:59:15 | |
# If you got it Clap your hands on the floor... # | 0:59:15 | 0:59:18 | |
# Day-O Me say day-ay-O | 0:59:18 | 0:59:22 | |
# Daylight come and we don't wanna go home... # | 0:59:22 | 0:59:26 | |
Jason Derulo is next, with a two-for-one offer that made us want to tell him to bog off. | 0:59:26 | 0:59:31 | |
This song mixes The Banana Boat Song and Robin S's Show Me Love, | 0:59:31 | 0:59:35 | |
and it's the worst thing you could ever do. | 0:59:35 | 0:59:38 | |
I think it kills the mash-up for ever. It's a terrible song. | 0:59:38 | 0:59:41 | |
# Day-O Me say day-ay-o... # | 0:59:41 | 0:59:45 | |
# My swagger's in check Get on the floor! # | 0:59:45 | 0:59:49 | |
But not even Jason could match what was undoubtedly the most annoying song of the year. | 0:59:49 | 0:59:53 | |
# My swagger's in check Get on the floor! # | 0:59:53 | 0:59:57 | |
Yes, it's Cher Lloyd's Swagger Jagger or should that be Oh, My Darling Clementine? | 0:59:57 | 1:00:02 | |
# Swagger jagger Swagger jagger | 1:00:02 | 1:00:06 | |
# You should get some of your own... # | 1:00:06 | 1:00:09 | |
Cher Lloyd and I are not natural musical bedmates, | 1:00:09 | 1:00:12 | |
yet she got in my head like an infected worm. | 1:00:12 | 1:00:16 | |
Swagger Jagger was all I sang for about two weeks. | 1:00:16 | 1:00:19 | |
You know, I lost friends over that, Cher. | 1:00:19 | 1:00:21 | |
# You should get some of your own... # | 1:00:21 | 1:00:23 | |
But isn't the whole point of Swagger Jagger that you're nicking | 1:00:23 | 1:00:26 | |
someone else's style and looking like someone else? | 1:00:26 | 1:00:29 | |
She has been dubbed the mini Cheryl Cole, | 1:00:29 | 1:00:32 | |
so there's a bit of irony going on there. | 1:00:32 | 1:00:35 | |
But one man we did all want to shout at this year makes it to number 32 on our list. | 1:00:35 | 1:00:41 | |
It's the highly annoying hairdresser, James Brown. | 1:00:41 | 1:00:44 | |
-I want to get out. I want to get out. -Go that way. -Oh, shit. | 1:00:44 | 1:00:49 | |
Usually famous for teasing the tresses of supermodel Kate Moss, | 1:00:49 | 1:00:53 | |
February 2011 saw James basking in his very own limelight. | 1:00:53 | 1:00:57 | |
James has got a new series called Great British Hairdresser. Is that you? | 1:00:57 | 1:01:01 | |
Well, I'm training new hairdressers to become me. | 1:01:01 | 1:01:05 | |
His growing popularity was almost as mysterious as his language. | 1:01:05 | 1:01:09 | |
Very soft. Super, super simple Very erratic. | 1:01:09 | 1:01:12 | |
Lovely, lovely soft texture. | 1:01:12 | 1:01:14 | |
Quite lumpy. | 1:01:14 | 1:01:15 | |
But the cue to become the next egomaniac celebrity hairdresser | 1:01:15 | 1:01:19 | |
dwindled dramatically when James's big mouth went wild | 1:01:19 | 1:01:23 | |
backstage at this year's BAFTA awards, shocking everyone. | 1:01:23 | 1:01:28 | |
There must have been a sale on the word nigger that day, | 1:01:28 | 1:01:31 | |
because he just couldn't let it go. | 1:01:31 | 1:01:33 | |
So it's like three for five on the nigger. Jesus! | 1:01:33 | 1:01:36 | |
Surely once is enough. Eight times? Come on, now, that's abuse! | 1:01:36 | 1:01:41 | |
I tell you what does annoy me, though. Who was counting? | 1:01:41 | 1:01:44 | |
Who was doing the tally? Like, one, two... | 1:01:44 | 1:01:49 | |
Instead of stopping it, you was counting? Eight times? | 1:01:49 | 1:01:52 | |
The man keeping the count, and bearing the brunt of the trash-talking trouble-maker | 1:01:52 | 1:01:57 | |
was media personality Ben Douglas, who swiftly took his offence to the pages of the Daily Mail. | 1:01:57 | 1:02:02 | |
But, of course, James dipped into the badly-behaved celebrity excuse box | 1:02:02 | 1:02:07 | |
and pulled out a classic line. | 1:02:07 | 1:02:09 | |
Because he was drunk. | 1:02:09 | 1:02:10 | |
We've all done stupid things when we're drunk, | 1:02:10 | 1:02:13 | |
but that's no excuse, I'm afraid. | 1:02:13 | 1:02:15 | |
How do people get so drunk that you lose the boundary | 1:02:15 | 1:02:19 | |
of such an abhorrent word? | 1:02:19 | 1:02:21 | |
So to just come out with it in a public place, | 1:02:21 | 1:02:23 | |
it's just frigging unbelievable. | 1:02:23 | 1:02:25 | |
I'm surprised he didn't finish the night outside hailing a taxi | 1:02:25 | 1:02:28 | |
with a white hood and a lit cross going, | 1:02:28 | 1:02:30 | |
"I'm only having a laugh. Chill out, everyone. Hooray!" | 1:02:30 | 1:02:33 | |
In a world of the annoying celebrity, not all press is good. | 1:02:33 | 1:02:37 | |
Hungover apologies in the press try to repair the damage but left | 1:02:37 | 1:02:41 | |
our celebrity hairdresser with a serious case of hair of the dog. | 1:02:41 | 1:02:44 | |
The one thing in James Brown's favour is the fact that he is friends with, | 1:02:44 | 1:02:47 | |
and the hairdresser to, Kate Moss, and I think that once you've got golden Kate on your arm, | 1:02:47 | 1:02:52 | |
you'll always be OK. James Brown will bounce back as long as Kate still has him on speed dial. | 1:02:52 | 1:02:57 | |
He claims to be able to read Kate Moss's mind, he knows her so well. | 1:02:57 | 1:03:02 | |
So, this guy has mindreading ability. James, what am I thinking? | 1:03:02 | 1:03:08 | |
At 31, another bigmouth strikes again. | 1:03:08 | 1:03:12 | |
# Stop me, oh Oh, oh, stop me... # | 1:03:12 | 1:03:16 | |
Morrissey was up to his usual outspoken tricks in July this year, | 1:03:16 | 1:03:20 | |
with his comments following the massacre of 97 young Norwegians on Utoya Island by Anders Breivik. | 1:03:20 | 1:03:25 | |
Whilst performing in Warsaw just a few days after the shooting, | 1:03:25 | 1:03:29 | |
animal lover Moz introduced old Smiths song Meat Is Murder with the following. | 1:03:29 | 1:03:34 | |
We all live in a murderer's world, as the events in Norway have shown | 1:03:34 | 1:03:39 | |
with 97 dead. | 1:03:39 | 1:03:42 | |
Though that is nothing compared to what happens in McDonalds and Kentucky Fried Shit every day. | 1:03:42 | 1:03:49 | |
Morrissey trying to equate the eating of chickens | 1:03:50 | 1:03:55 | |
and cows to the callous murder of 97 young people is possibly | 1:03:55 | 1:04:02 | |
one of the most annoying statements of the year. | 1:04:02 | 1:04:05 | |
Honestly, you're more worried about chickens than you are about people. | 1:04:05 | 1:04:10 | |
You need to kind of adjust yourself. | 1:04:10 | 1:04:13 | |
# Who said I'd lied to her? # | 1:04:13 | 1:04:16 | |
Oh, dear, why did you say that, Moz? | 1:04:16 | 1:04:19 | |
I suppose, in his old age, he's just getting more and more bitter. | 1:04:19 | 1:04:24 | |
Just be yourself, and that's all I ever do. | 1:04:24 | 1:04:27 | |
Morrissey loves animals, and we all know that, | 1:04:27 | 1:04:30 | |
but sometimes maybe he should think a little of people's feelings. | 1:04:30 | 1:04:35 | |
# Stop me, oh Oh, oh, stop me... # | 1:04:37 | 1:04:40 | |
I can't imagine there were people in Norway going, | 1:04:40 | 1:04:42 | |
"Oh, my gosh, this is awful! But it could be worse - | 1:04:42 | 1:04:45 | |
"We could be having a bargain bucket right now." | 1:04:45 | 1:04:47 | |
# Stop me if you think that you've heard this one before... # | 1:04:47 | 1:04:51 | |
If you listen to Morrissey long enough, | 1:04:51 | 1:04:53 | |
it will make you want to take up eating meat. | 1:04:53 | 1:04:55 | |
He's got it all wrong. | 1:04:55 | 1:04:58 | |
As soon as he said it, I had a burger just to get on his tits. | 1:04:58 | 1:05:02 | |
Listen, I get it, you know what I mean? | 1:05:06 | 1:05:09 | |
Let's look after the tiny little creatures, but you can see chickens | 1:05:09 | 1:05:13 | |
and cows all over the world going, "Morrissey, shut up. We'll just speak for ourselves, thanks." | 1:05:13 | 1:05:19 | |
Up next, a bothersome bride. | 1:05:20 | 1:05:24 | |
# Hey, baby I think I wanna marry you... # | 1:05:24 | 1:05:28 | |
We all love a good wedding, and there have been loads this year - | 1:05:28 | 1:05:33 | |
Kate and Wills, Kate and Jamie, Kim and...what's his name? | 1:05:33 | 1:05:37 | |
But excessive spending on the big day tends to get us a bit wound up | 1:05:37 | 1:05:41 | |
and this blushing bride got us annoyed by splashing out on enough wedding dresses for all of them. | 1:05:41 | 1:05:48 | |
After her marriage to Joe Glass, Helene Manca's compulsive wedding dress purchase disorder | 1:05:48 | 1:05:53 | |
hit the headlines when it was revealed | 1:05:53 | 1:05:57 | |
that she had spent £20,000 buying 18 different dresses for the ceremony. | 1:05:57 | 1:06:01 | |
I was surprised that people would be interested in the first place, | 1:06:01 | 1:06:05 | |
but I was even more surprised that people would have such strong opinion | 1:06:05 | 1:06:08 | |
about something that, to me, was just some fun. | 1:06:08 | 1:06:11 | |
20 grand? That's the average cost of a wedding | 1:06:11 | 1:06:15 | |
and she spent it just on being completely self-involved. | 1:06:15 | 1:06:20 | |
A lot of women have a specific idea, but I was kind of the opposite. | 1:06:20 | 1:06:24 | |
I just liked many, many, many. | 1:06:24 | 1:06:26 | |
# I wish I knew what dress to wear... # | 1:06:26 | 1:06:31 | |
In France, a lot of people change for the evening, | 1:06:31 | 1:06:34 | |
so I thought, you know, two is a reasonable number. | 1:06:34 | 1:06:39 | |
But then it carried on, and the more I tried on the more I thought | 1:06:39 | 1:06:43 | |
that it was the one I had to wear, and I ended up buying quite a few. | 1:06:43 | 1:06:47 | |
Yes, that's 18, actually, Helene, but you didn't even wear half of them. | 1:06:47 | 1:06:53 | |
Helene bought 18 dresses, wore nine on the day. | 1:06:53 | 1:06:56 | |
I'm trying to settle on ONE for my big day. | 1:06:56 | 1:06:59 | |
I did try to narrow things down, | 1:07:01 | 1:07:03 | |
which is why I ended up only wearing nine. | 1:07:03 | 1:07:05 | |
# Cos we are living in a material world | 1:07:05 | 1:07:10 | |
# And I am a material girl... # | 1:07:10 | 1:07:13 | |
Now £20,000 is a lot of wedding wonga, | 1:07:13 | 1:07:15 | |
so, did the nuptial nine deliver their matrimonial money's worth? | 1:07:15 | 1:07:18 | |
The main one was obviously the ceremony one. | 1:07:18 | 1:07:21 | |
Cost - £3,200. | 1:07:21 | 1:07:23 | |
Time worn - 90 minutes. | 1:07:23 | 1:07:26 | |
Then there was the one when I arrived at the reception. | 1:07:26 | 1:07:30 | |
Then there was one for the cocktail and one for the dinner. | 1:07:30 | 1:07:35 | |
Then there was one for the speeches and one for the cutting of the cake. | 1:07:35 | 1:07:39 | |
Then one for the first dance. | 1:07:39 | 1:07:42 | |
And then one for the party at the end. | 1:07:42 | 1:07:44 | |
And then one for right at the end, | 1:07:44 | 1:07:46 | |
when the party was even more swinging. | 1:07:46 | 1:07:50 | |
The dresses that she wore were quite complicated. | 1:07:50 | 1:07:53 | |
They're not the kind of thing you can slip into yourself. | 1:07:53 | 1:07:56 | |
So, she had seven bridesmaids or something, | 1:07:56 | 1:07:59 | |
so a large amount of the wedding party spent most of their time | 1:07:59 | 1:08:02 | |
in a toilet cubicle where you're going, "Oh, get it on me. Zip it up, zip it up!" | 1:08:02 | 1:08:07 | |
It must be quite annoying, being a guest at the wedding - | 1:08:07 | 1:08:09 | |
you can't really relax, you can't get rid of your camera | 1:08:09 | 1:08:12 | |
because you've got to keep it on you to get a shot of the next dress. | 1:08:12 | 1:08:15 | |
You can't drink too much cos you've to remember each dress. It's a bit selfish, really, Helene. | 1:08:15 | 1:08:20 | |
Hello! It's not all about you. There's a groom there. | 1:08:20 | 1:08:22 | |
You're exchanging vows. It's meant to be about the day. | 1:08:22 | 1:08:25 | |
# Glamorous... # | 1:08:25 | 1:08:26 | |
Joe was actually really supportive and he thought it was a really fun idea | 1:08:26 | 1:08:31 | |
and he just wanted me to be happy and do whatever. | 1:08:31 | 1:08:33 | |
# Those wedding bells... # | 1:08:33 | 1:08:35 | |
Apparently, her husband changed his degree | 1:08:35 | 1:08:39 | |
and he's now studying finance, and I think he's going to need it. | 1:08:39 | 1:08:43 | |
-# Wedding bells -Wedding bells | 1:08:43 | 1:08:46 | |
# Those wedding bells... # | 1:08:46 | 1:08:49 | |
At number 29, it's a little something for the kids. | 1:08:49 | 1:08:53 | |
2011 saw the 10th anniversary of 9/11. | 1:08:54 | 1:08:59 | |
There were plenty of fitting tributes throughout the world | 1:08:59 | 1:09:03 | |
including memorial services in both New York and London. | 1:09:03 | 1:09:07 | |
But then, there was also this. | 1:09:07 | 1:09:10 | |
We Shall Never Forget 9/11 is a colouring book | 1:09:10 | 1:09:13 | |
aimed at children aged up to 11. | 1:09:13 | 1:09:16 | |
The book features a number of crayon-friendly images | 1:09:16 | 1:09:18 | |
associated either with the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Centre | 1:09:18 | 1:09:22 | |
in 2001, or the subsequent US hunt for Osama Bin Laden. | 1:09:22 | 1:09:25 | |
I'm all for remembering history | 1:09:25 | 1:09:27 | |
and helping children to engage with history in a creative way, | 1:09:27 | 1:09:31 | |
but there is a taste and decency line that's clearly been breached | 1:09:31 | 1:09:34 | |
by having young children colour in the orange flames of doom. | 1:09:34 | 1:09:38 | |
Most annoying to me is that you would even take an event like that | 1:09:38 | 1:09:41 | |
and try to bring it down to a childlike level. | 1:09:41 | 1:09:44 | |
"OK, here you go, kids, this is what happened. | 1:09:44 | 1:09:47 | |
"You see that guy in the turban? He's bad." | 1:09:47 | 1:09:50 | |
That's just a horrible, horrible thing to do. | 1:09:50 | 1:09:52 | |
It's not a book about acceptance, | 1:09:52 | 1:09:55 | |
it's a book about singling out different cultures | 1:09:55 | 1:09:58 | |
and that's a very sad thing to be teaching children. | 1:09:58 | 1:10:01 | |
Despite its critics, the publisher of the book, Wayne Bell, has argued it has no agenda | 1:10:01 | 1:10:06 | |
and is simply a factual depiction of the events surrounding 9/11. | 1:10:06 | 1:10:10 | |
There's no statement attached to this book. | 1:10:10 | 1:10:12 | |
This book is based on market research. | 1:10:12 | 1:10:14 | |
It's based on what people tell us that they're looking for. | 1:10:14 | 1:10:17 | |
The book has become a big hit for Wayne. | 1:10:17 | 1:10:20 | |
It's the fastest selling his company has ever published | 1:10:20 | 1:10:23 | |
and has travelled to 157 countries around the world. | 1:10:23 | 1:10:26 | |
But not everyone is convinced how appropriate it is for kids. | 1:10:26 | 1:10:30 | |
This is the best picture. | 1:10:32 | 1:10:34 | |
Not only is it a man holding the gun on Osama and his wife, | 1:10:34 | 1:10:38 | |
but also, the bullet is on the way. | 1:10:38 | 1:10:40 | |
You don't even have to colour in the bullet. | 1:10:40 | 1:10:43 | |
It's there, it's midway, it's black and it's full of death. | 1:10:43 | 1:10:47 | |
The most annoying thing about this book is that | 1:10:47 | 1:10:49 | |
George Bush has been drawn with a bit of intelligence | 1:10:49 | 1:10:52 | |
and integrity, which is wholly inaccurate. | 1:10:52 | 1:10:56 | |
However, bonus, | 1:10:56 | 1:10:58 | |
you can just write "knob" on his forehead, wherever you want. | 1:10:58 | 1:11:02 | |
It's up there with the Titanic ice-cube maker | 1:11:02 | 1:11:05 | |
and the Hiroshima microwave oven. | 1:11:05 | 1:11:07 | |
That's how tasteless this is. | 1:11:07 | 1:11:09 | |
Revealing some true colours at 28, | 1:11:09 | 1:11:12 | |
we've got some very dodgy commentators. | 1:11:12 | 1:11:15 | |
# Flintstones Meet the Flintstones... # | 1:11:15 | 1:11:18 | |
It might have been the Ice Age that killed off the Pterodactyl and T-Rex, but it was sexist | 1:11:18 | 1:11:22 | |
and outdated attitudes that saw the extinction of our next annoying duo. | 1:11:22 | 1:11:28 | |
Gray and Keys simply didn't realise they were dinosaurs. | 1:11:28 | 1:11:31 | |
Sky Sports front men, Richard Keys and Andy Gray, | 1:11:31 | 1:11:35 | |
actually dated not from pre-history but from an era | 1:11:35 | 1:11:38 | |
when real men were in the pub and a woman's place was in the kitchen. | 1:11:38 | 1:11:42 | |
Having dared to abandon the washing up, referee's assistant Sian Massey | 1:11:42 | 1:11:46 | |
got the full misogynist treatment as Sky Sports' archaic analysts | 1:11:46 | 1:11:51 | |
prepared for live coverage of Wolves v Liverpool in the Premier League. | 1:11:51 | 1:11:55 | |
Well, somebody better get down there and explain offside to her. | 1:11:55 | 1:11:59 | |
Yeah, I know. Can you believe that? Female linesmen, eh? | 1:11:59 | 1:12:04 | |
That's exactly what I said. Women don't know the offside rule. | 1:12:04 | 1:12:07 | |
Of course they don't. | 1:12:07 | 1:12:09 | |
Women are brain surgeons, women are astronauts, | 1:12:09 | 1:12:12 | |
yet for some reason the offside rule is apparently like kryptonite to us, | 1:12:12 | 1:12:16 | |
that when you explain quite simply the rules of a GAME to us, we're unable to understand it. | 1:12:16 | 1:12:21 | |
In the match, she actually got it bang on. | 1:12:21 | 1:12:24 | |
It was a really contentious decision, and she nailed it | 1:12:24 | 1:12:27 | |
better than most other linespeople that I've ever seen. | 1:12:27 | 1:12:30 | |
Waldorf and Statler, two blokes from the Muppets, very much like that. | 1:12:30 | 1:12:34 | |
-What do you think of it so far? -Oh, rubbish, bloody women. | 1:12:34 | 1:12:37 | |
-Don't know what offside is. -I -don't know what offside is. | 1:12:37 | 1:12:40 | |
West Ham chief Karren Brady was next in the firing line | 1:12:40 | 1:12:43 | |
as their off-air chat was recorded and then MYSTERIOUSLY leaked to the media. | 1:12:43 | 1:12:48 | |
Did you see charming Karren Brady this morning, on about sexism? | 1:12:48 | 1:12:52 | |
Yeah, do me a favour, love. | 1:12:52 | 1:12:54 | |
Now, Karren Brady, when I've seen her on The Apprentice, she's got the eyes of a shark. | 1:12:54 | 1:12:59 | |
I think that woman could kill you without touching you | 1:12:59 | 1:13:02 | |
and to pick her, I think, wasn't the best choice of person | 1:13:02 | 1:13:06 | |
because I think she could really give you a doing. | 1:13:06 | 1:13:09 | |
Today, Andy Gray wasn't at home but his fiancee was. | 1:13:09 | 1:13:15 | |
He's wanted to apologise for the last few days, | 1:13:15 | 1:13:18 | |
desperately wanted to apologise. | 1:13:18 | 1:13:20 | |
Sky bosses, unimpressed by Andy getting "her indoors" | 1:13:21 | 1:13:25 | |
to apologise for him, showed Gray the red card | 1:13:25 | 1:13:28 | |
whilst his sexist sidekick tried his best to avoid the subs bench. | 1:13:28 | 1:13:33 | |
I'm on my way into London now, to start apologising to the people that I need to. | 1:13:33 | 1:13:39 | |
For the immediate, I would just like to say how deeply sorry I am | 1:13:39 | 1:13:44 | |
for the part I have played in causing this furore. | 1:13:44 | 1:13:49 | |
Interviewed on Talk Sport, Keys revealed he'd apologised to Sian Massey | 1:13:49 | 1:13:53 | |
and tried to call Karren Brady too. | 1:13:53 | 1:13:55 | |
I remember Richard Keys saying, | 1:13:55 | 1:13:58 | |
"Oh, I can't believe Karren Brady hasn't returned my call. | 1:13:58 | 1:14:01 | |
"I was trying to get in touch with her." | 1:14:01 | 1:14:03 | |
Under his breath, he's muttering the words, "typical woman." | 1:14:03 | 1:14:06 | |
Do you know what I mean? In your own time, love. | 1:14:06 | 1:14:08 | |
# Boys will be boys... # | 1:14:08 | 1:14:10 | |
Keys resigned, and the internet was suddenly awash with lewd clips. | 1:14:10 | 1:14:14 | |
The first of which involved Andy Gray suggestively inviting Sky co-presenter, Charlotte Jackson, | 1:14:14 | 1:14:20 | |
to stick a radio mic down his trousers. | 1:14:20 | 1:14:23 | |
Asking a lady to tuck in your mic | 1:14:23 | 1:14:26 | |
and pointing downwards is not a good idea, not a good idea. | 1:14:26 | 1:14:31 | |
# Boys will be boys... # | 1:14:31 | 1:14:34 | |
Either Sky were waiting to give them the push or it was indeed an international cabal of feminazis | 1:14:34 | 1:14:41 | |
who had been waiting for some time to get rid of Richard and Andy. | 1:14:41 | 1:14:45 | |
I'm not saying which one is correct, all I am saying is that | 1:14:45 | 1:14:48 | |
there are quite a lot of women in this country who know the true story. | 1:14:48 | 1:14:53 | |
More annoying than Andy and Richard, we're pretty sure this next lot would get a few votes. | 1:14:56 | 1:15:01 | |
Yes, we're talking politicians. Guaranteed to irritate us and this year was no exception. | 1:15:01 | 1:15:06 | |
Here's our top three political cock-ups of 2011. | 1:15:06 | 1:15:10 | |
In third place is Labour's very own Hazel Blears who blurted out a real blunder during the UK riots. | 1:15:11 | 1:15:17 | |
In an interview with Sky News, Hazel forgot why the kids weren't in school... | 1:15:17 | 1:15:21 | |
during the summer holidays. | 1:15:21 | 1:15:23 | |
I think we also - not right now, but later on - we need to think | 1:15:23 | 1:15:27 | |
about some of our young people and why are they not in school? | 1:15:27 | 1:15:30 | |
I don't know if she was suffering from memory loss | 1:15:30 | 1:15:33 | |
or just a loss of perspective - | 1:15:33 | 1:15:34 | |
whether they should be in school or not, | 1:15:34 | 1:15:36 | |
they shouldn't be throwing rocks through windows. | 1:15:36 | 1:15:38 | |
At number two is George Osborne. The Chancellor of the Exchequer made a goofy gaff at the GQ Awards | 1:15:38 | 1:15:44 | |
when he picked up a gong. Attempting to crack one out, | 1:15:44 | 1:15:47 | |
George remarked the politics pages of the magazine were the only ones | 1:15:47 | 1:15:50 | |
not usually stuck together by readers' bodily fluids. | 1:15:50 | 1:15:54 | |
George Osborne really let himself down by making that classic mistake | 1:15:54 | 1:15:57 | |
of trying to be funny as a politician. | 1:15:57 | 1:16:00 | |
If he was an open spot at a comedy club, he'd have been booed off. | 1:16:00 | 1:16:03 | |
Fundamentally, he should be looking at the economy | 1:16:03 | 1:16:06 | |
and not thinking about wank jokes. | 1:16:06 | 1:16:08 | |
You could see people going, "What the...? Get off!" | 1:16:08 | 1:16:12 | |
Joint winners at number one are gruesome twosome Cameron and Clegg. | 1:16:14 | 1:16:18 | |
Earlier this year, Dave and Nick were poised | 1:16:18 | 1:16:20 | |
for the perfect photo opp at Guy's Hospital. | 1:16:20 | 1:16:23 | |
But there was a problem. | 1:16:23 | 1:16:24 | |
The coalition crew hadn't bothered to follow strict hospital hygiene standards. | 1:16:24 | 1:16:28 | |
Enter outraged senior surgeon David Nunn to give them a roasting. | 1:16:28 | 1:16:33 | |
Sorry, just a minute. Excuse me. I am the senior orthopaedic surgeon in this department. | 1:16:35 | 1:16:39 | |
Why are we all told to walk around like this? | 1:16:39 | 1:16:41 | |
They looked flustered. "Oh, what do we do here? | 1:16:41 | 1:16:44 | |
"We're supposed to look great with the patients." It was a sweet moment. | 1:16:44 | 1:16:47 | |
Can you come and talk to me about it? | 1:16:47 | 1:16:49 | |
Cameron was trying to smooth it all over and the guy just went, | 1:16:49 | 1:16:53 | |
"No, get out." | 1:16:53 | 1:16:55 | |
I agree. Thanks. Because we're all taking our ties off. | 1:16:56 | 1:17:00 | |
They got lobbed out by the doctor because they were unhygienic. Good. | 1:17:00 | 1:17:04 | |
I'm not having it. Out. | 1:17:04 | 1:17:06 | |
It's good they were told off for that, cos there's no telling where Clegg's fingers has been. | 1:17:06 | 1:17:10 | |
HE COUGHS | 1:17:10 | 1:17:12 | |
Returning to our top 50. | 1:17:15 | 1:17:18 | |
Parading in at 27 are some serious sluts. | 1:17:18 | 1:17:21 | |
# Hit me, go! Get your freak on... # | 1:17:21 | 1:17:23 | |
Back in January 2011, a Toronto policeman caused outrage in Canada | 1:17:23 | 1:17:28 | |
when his un-PC advice to a group of female students made headline news. | 1:17:28 | 1:17:32 | |
His suggestion that dressing like a slut increased a woman's chances of attack caused a storm of protest. | 1:17:32 | 1:17:39 | |
It's not acceptable, and transfers the blame and responsibility | 1:17:39 | 1:17:43 | |
for such a vicious crime from the person that it should fall squarely on, which is the perpetrator. | 1:17:43 | 1:17:48 | |
It's a really outdated idea that a woman who dresses | 1:17:48 | 1:17:52 | |
in a particular way is asking to be raped or attacked | 1:17:52 | 1:17:55 | |
or something, and that a police officer | 1:17:55 | 1:17:58 | |
would actually perpetuate this stupid myth is just insane. | 1:17:58 | 1:18:03 | |
In response to the outcry, the women of Toronto organised a public protest | 1:18:03 | 1:18:09 | |
and provocatively named it the SlutWalk. | 1:18:09 | 1:18:12 | |
For me and, I think for a number of other people, it's an attempt to reclaim the word "slut" itself | 1:18:12 | 1:18:17 | |
because once you reclaim it, you take the power from it. | 1:18:17 | 1:18:20 | |
# I've got the power! # | 1:18:20 | 1:18:22 | |
I'm all for women's lib. I'm all for, just because I'm flashing my nipple | 1:18:22 | 1:18:26 | |
in your face doesn't mean you have to lick it. | 1:18:26 | 1:18:29 | |
The protest caught the world's attention | 1:18:29 | 1:18:31 | |
and soon, communities across the globe wanted to join in. | 1:18:31 | 1:18:35 | |
It's the latest in a series of international demonstrations called SlutWalks. | 1:18:35 | 1:18:39 | |
We found out on the internet and we were like, "We wish this was happening in the States. | 1:18:39 | 1:18:43 | |
"We wish we could do this", and then we kind of just decided to do it. | 1:18:43 | 1:18:47 | |
One policeman in Canada says, "Don't dress like a slut | 1:18:47 | 1:18:50 | |
"because then you'll get attacked and the blame will all be on you." | 1:18:50 | 1:18:55 | |
From that one comment, across the world, women went out and marched. | 1:18:55 | 1:19:01 | |
CHANTING: Two! Four! Six! Eight! | 1:19:01 | 1:19:03 | |
There was actually one in Ireland, but they dressed up in anoraks. | 1:19:03 | 1:19:08 | |
It was raining, let's give them that, but... | 1:19:08 | 1:19:10 | |
"Oh, look, I have my anorak open. That's slutty enough for me." | 1:19:10 | 1:19:13 | |
However we dress, wherever we go... | 1:19:13 | 1:19:16 | |
The SlutWalk is going to be the women's pride contingency of like the gay pride parades. | 1:19:16 | 1:19:21 | |
It's going to be the SlutWalk women's pride, every single city across the world. | 1:19:21 | 1:19:27 | |
I really hope the SlutWalk becomes a national holiday. | 1:19:27 | 1:19:30 | |
CHANTING | 1:19:30 | 1:19:34 | |
At 26, it's little miss perfect. | 1:19:34 | 1:19:38 | |
This has been the year of Gwyneth Paltrow. | 1:19:40 | 1:19:43 | |
Everywhere you look, Gwyneth is there - her website, | 1:19:43 | 1:19:47 | |
her appearances on Glee, | 1:19:47 | 1:19:48 | |
her films - she is everywhere! | 1:19:48 | 1:19:51 | |
MUSIC: "Forget You" by Gwyneth Paltrow | 1:19:51 | 1:19:54 | |
She looks unbelievable. The woman has the best legs in Hollywood. | 1:19:54 | 1:19:58 | |
All these women everywhere are just like, "We need to look like her! | 1:19:58 | 1:20:01 | |
"She looks amazing. Her skin's amazing!" | 1:20:01 | 1:20:03 | |
And it all just gets quite overwhelming. | 1:20:03 | 1:20:06 | |
Gwyneth Paltrow is an actress and yet she has been doing everything OTHER than that right in our faces. | 1:20:06 | 1:20:11 | |
I can sing, and look at my website. | 1:20:11 | 1:20:14 | |
I'll tell you how to be the perfect mother, role model and housewife. | 1:20:14 | 1:20:17 | |
She's kind of treating us like she thinks we think she's normal. | 1:20:17 | 1:20:22 | |
Literally, this woman is unbelievable. | 1:20:22 | 1:20:24 | |
If being an impossibly glamorous A-lister | 1:20:24 | 1:20:27 | |
and an amazing mum isn't annoying enough, | 1:20:27 | 1:20:29 | |
2011 was also the year that Gwyneth revealed she can cook too. | 1:20:29 | 1:20:33 | |
I think it's really important, as I said, to make home-made food, | 1:20:33 | 1:20:37 | |
just the experience of that, you know, making food for your kids and people that you love. | 1:20:37 | 1:20:41 | |
With her book Notes From My Kitchen, | 1:20:41 | 1:20:44 | |
she lifted the lid on what she and that bloke from Coldplay eat | 1:20:44 | 1:20:47 | |
when they're not on their latest celebrity fad diets. | 1:20:47 | 1:20:50 | |
Gwyneth Paltrow's cookery book is a work of art, | 1:20:50 | 1:20:53 | |
if it was a work of satire. | 1:20:53 | 1:20:55 | |
She doesn't look like she eats. | 1:20:55 | 1:20:57 | |
I'm sorry, but it must be | 1:20:57 | 1:21:00 | |
a very thin volume, really. Ah, it's just, er... | 1:21:00 | 1:21:04 | |
water. | 1:21:04 | 1:21:06 | |
There's a burger in there. | 1:21:06 | 1:21:08 | |
It's not just a burger, it's a cheese-stuffed burger. | 1:21:08 | 1:21:11 | |
Now, I've figured it out. She doesn't eat any of the food that's in her book, she licks it. | 1:21:11 | 1:21:16 | |
But it wasn't just the food that was the problem. | 1:21:16 | 1:21:19 | |
It was also the superstar cost of making it. | 1:21:19 | 1:21:23 | |
What's most annoying is the obvious lack of being in touch | 1:21:23 | 1:21:28 | |
with the reality the rest of us are living in. | 1:21:28 | 1:21:31 | |
Her brownie recipe actually costs about £45 to make. | 1:21:31 | 1:21:36 | |
Now, if you think 45 quid for some brownies sounds like a lot, | 1:21:36 | 1:21:41 | |
we actually costed the ingredients Gwyneth recommends. | 1:21:41 | 1:21:44 | |
By the time you've bought items like imported Vermont maple syrup, brown rice syrup and high-quality cocoa, | 1:21:44 | 1:21:50 | |
the total cost actually came to nearer £50. | 1:21:50 | 1:21:53 | |
Best of all, though, are Gwyneth's shopping tips. | 1:21:53 | 1:21:57 | |
One point she had in her cookbook that I thought was extraordinary - | 1:21:57 | 1:22:00 | |
the idea that you should take your kids to the supermarket | 1:22:00 | 1:22:03 | |
and give them their own trolley. | 1:22:03 | 1:22:05 | |
It would be chaos in the supermarkets of Britain. | 1:22:05 | 1:22:09 | |
They say Gwyneth Paltrow doesn't live in the real world. I've no idea where they get that. | 1:22:09 | 1:22:13 | |
Round 25. | 1:22:16 | 1:22:18 | |
Our next annoyer certainly proved anything BUT a knockout in 2011. | 1:22:18 | 1:22:23 | |
I wanted to support him so much because he's from South London, | 1:22:23 | 1:22:27 | |
I'm from South London. | 1:22:27 | 1:22:28 | |
I was like, "Yes, finally someone we could cheer on and champion!" | 1:22:28 | 1:22:32 | |
Having been crowned WBA Champion in 2009, | 1:22:34 | 1:22:38 | |
preening pugilist David Haye sought to unify the various | 1:22:38 | 1:22:41 | |
world heavyweight titles by taking on and beating Wladimir Klitschko, | 1:22:41 | 1:22:45 | |
the younger of the gigantic Klitschko brothers from Kazakhstan. | 1:22:45 | 1:22:49 | |
But David's preparations for the fight seemed a little unusual. | 1:22:50 | 1:22:54 | |
CHRIS MOYLES: Boxing royalty - David Haye! Whoa! | 1:22:54 | 1:22:57 | |
Whoo-whoo-whoo! | 1:22:57 | 1:22:59 | |
They mainly seemed to involve chat-show sofas. | 1:22:59 | 1:23:02 | |
'He just absolutely lost the plot.' | 1:23:02 | 1:23:04 | |
I think he was on Alan Carr, he was on Graham Norton, | 1:23:04 | 1:23:08 | |
he was giving it absolutely loads. His sportsmanship went completely out the window. | 1:23:08 | 1:23:13 | |
In the build-up to the match he just...kept on talking. | 1:23:13 | 1:23:17 | |
He just kept on going on and on and on. | 1:23:17 | 1:23:20 | |
..championship in Germany... | 1:23:20 | 1:23:22 | |
..we'll remember the fight itself. I've gone over to someone's hotel... | 1:23:22 | 1:23:25 | |
I will knock out Wladimir Klitschko. | 1:23:25 | 1:23:28 | |
# You only get one shot So make it count... # | 1:23:28 | 1:23:31 | |
No punches were pulled when it came to dissing his opponent, who he even compared to Borat. | 1:23:31 | 1:23:36 | |
Ohh, it's nice. | 1:23:36 | 1:23:39 | |
It's definitely below the belt line, and it's the wrong attitude. | 1:23:39 | 1:23:44 | |
# You only get one shot So make it count... # | 1:23:44 | 1:23:47 | |
David Haye's promotional gimmicks were just... | 1:23:47 | 1:23:50 | |
they were just so disrespectful, so childish. | 1:23:50 | 1:23:53 | |
Yes, this is a good picture of me with Wladimir | 1:23:53 | 1:23:57 | |
and Vitali Klitschko's severed heads. | 1:23:57 | 1:24:00 | |
# There's only one David Haye. # | 1:24:00 | 1:24:04 | |
10,000 British fans travelled out to Hamburg with high hopes | 1:24:04 | 1:24:08 | |
of seeing The Hayemaker triumph. | 1:24:08 | 1:24:10 | |
At the end of the day, David Haye's bark was way worse than his bite. | 1:24:10 | 1:24:14 | |
Despite all the hype, Haye proved more chump than champ | 1:24:14 | 1:24:18 | |
with Klitschko winning on points after 12 rounds. | 1:24:18 | 1:24:21 | |
I'm sure there's been many a boxer that have fought till | 1:24:23 | 1:24:26 | |
the bitter end with broken arms, broken ribs, | 1:24:26 | 1:24:29 | |
but he, his little toe ruined it for him. | 1:24:29 | 1:24:33 | |
# Be a star But who's laughing now? | 1:24:33 | 1:24:37 | |
# Who's laughing now? # | 1:24:37 | 1:24:40 | |
I hate it when boxers make excuses after fights. It makes me sick. | 1:24:40 | 1:24:43 | |
I broke my toe three weeks ago and there was no way I was going to pull out of this fight. | 1:24:43 | 1:24:48 | |
He broke his toe? Really? | 1:24:48 | 1:24:51 | |
Yeah, because of course when you're pushing off for a punch, | 1:24:51 | 1:24:54 | |
it all comes from the toe - not from the fists, the waist or the rest of the body, it's all in that toe. | 1:24:54 | 1:25:00 | |
And in case we doubted that David had a sore toe, he walked around for the next month | 1:25:00 | 1:25:04 | |
with open-toe sandals, just so you could see. "Hey, look at my toe. It's really sore." | 1:25:04 | 1:25:09 | |
Afterwards, though, the Klitschkos got their revenge. | 1:25:11 | 1:25:14 | |
They had a T-shirt made with a severed toe just to wind him up, | 1:25:14 | 1:25:17 | |
because that was the real reason that David lost the fight. | 1:25:17 | 1:25:20 | |
SHE YAWNS | 1:25:23 | 1:25:25 | |
That's your lot for now. | 1:25:25 | 1:25:27 | |
But the good news is, we've still got plenty more where that came from. | 1:25:27 | 1:25:31 | |
Kim Kardashian does it again. | 1:25:31 | 1:25:33 | |
Join us next time, | 1:25:33 | 1:25:35 | |
as we put the year's biggest irritants firmly in place. | 1:25:35 | 1:25:38 | |
You're trying too hard! It's not nice! | 1:25:38 | 1:25:41 | |
There'll be an Aussie boy... | 1:25:41 | 1:25:42 | |
I can walk around with a T-shirt that says, "Call my agent." I'm annoying! | 1:25:42 | 1:25:46 | |
..and a Geordie girl... | 1:25:46 | 1:25:48 | |
You did it first! | 1:25:48 | 1:25:50 | |
I'm furious! I'm just... shaking with rage. | 1:25:50 | 1:25:54 | |
-..some super-injunctions... -Honestly, I really have no idea. Do YOU know? | 1:25:54 | 1:25:59 | |
..and superstar meltdowns. | 1:25:59 | 1:26:01 | |
It's nothing less than huge. | 1:26:01 | 1:26:03 | |
Some dumb footballers... | 1:26:03 | 1:26:05 | |
That's Mario. He's a confused guy! | 1:26:05 | 1:26:07 | |
..and even dumber looters. | 1:26:07 | 1:26:09 | |
There is nothing gangster about Basmati rice. | 1:26:09 | 1:26:12 | |
We've got two terrible twins... | 1:26:12 | 1:26:15 | |
J to the E to the D to the WARD, Planet Jedward! | 1:26:15 | 1:26:17 | |
..and one very pesky pie man... | 1:26:17 | 1:26:20 | |
I was the guy who threw a pie in Rupert Murdoch's face. | 1:26:20 | 1:26:25 | |
..as we continue to count down the most annoying people of 2011. | 1:26:25 | 1:26:30 | |
We're going to have a good time, whatever happens. | 1:26:30 | 1:26:33 | |
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd | 1:26:46 | 1:26:49 | |
E-mail [email protected] | 1:26:49 | 1:26:52 |