Francophiles v Fell Walkers Only Connect

Hello and welcome to Only Connect

and I'd like to say right now that everyone here is a winner.

I'd like to say it right now

because in half an hour, three of them will be losers.

Both the teams tonight have already won one heat.

If they win this, they'll go straight through to the semi-final.

If they lose, they'll go on to play another team that have also lost.

Two losers. Two teams of losers.

Six losers.

I look forward to putting a positive spin on that one.

For now, though, congratulations and hello again to, on my right,

Ian Clark, a Cambridge law graduate who can order a beer

in every major European language.

Sam Goodyear, a former sports odds compiler,

who once had to translate 3,000 horse racing terms into French.

And their captain, Mark Walton, a geography graduate and sales manager

who captained a pool team that won the All London Cup.

United by their passion for all things French,

they are the Francophiles.

So, Mark, you beat the Festival Fans in your first game.

How have you prepared for the next one?

Well, living up to our name as the Francophiles,

we went out for a French meal last night and tested each other out

by trying to ask some Only Connect style questions to each other.

To the nearest four, how many horses do you think you've eaten?

-Probably only about half of one last night, I think, wasn't it?

-Maybe.

Wittingly, anyway.

I'm also a fan of French food, but also a fan of really cheap

microwave meals, so probably slightly more than the others.

That's very nearly a herd, isn't it?

You will be facing tonight, on my left, Jim Taylor,

a solutions engineer who plays trombone

in a family four-part harmony group.

Craig Almond, a law graduate who is currently walking his way through

the 214 Wainwright peaks in the Lake District.

And their captain, Mike Amberry,

a civil servant and keen morris dancer

who was dropped on his head at his christening.

Fond of rambling in the hills of the north, they are the Fell Walkers.

Mike, you beat the General Practitioners in your first heat.

Any new tactics for this game?

We think we're just going to go with exactly the same,

although if that fails, we'll probably go for blind terror

and wild guessing to get us through.

You can't go wrong with a bit of wild guessing.

Let's see what you will be guessing at this evening.

The toss was won by the Francophiles,

you'll be going first. You remember, I expect, round one.

Four apparently random clues. What's the connection between them?

Buzz in early and you'll get more points,

unless, of course, you buzz in with the wrong answer.

-The first thing you need to do is choose a hieroglyph.

-Twisted Flax.

Let's see what the Twisted Flax holds for you.

What is the connection between these clues? Here's the first.

-Drinker respirator?

-What is a drinker respirator?

Shall we have the next one? Next.

A Ted Hughes protagonist.

-The

-Iron Man? Things called the iron man, the superhero or something?

-Shall we go next?

-Is it iron...? Next!

-Iron curtain.

-That's right.

-BELL

-Iron.

-That is absolutely the answer. Why is it the answer?

Well, the Iron Curtain separated NATO and the Warsaw Pact

and the Ted Hughes protagonist is The Iron Man.

-Otto von Bismarck is the Iron Chancellor.

-That's right.

-And I don't know what a drinker respirator is.

-An iron lung?

-It is an iron lung!

-Oh!

It was invented by the Drinkers, Cecil and Philip Drinker

invented the iron lung, so that's the reason for that.

Well done. Coming in after three clues, you get two points.

-Fell Walkers, what would you like?

-Eye of Horus, please.

Why have you chosen the Eye of Horus?

It was looking at me in a funny way.

It does that! It does that. Let's see what it was winking about.

What is the connection between these clues? Here's the first.

Something to do with...

-Is that Michael Crawford?

-Maybe. Do you want to go for the next one?

Next, please.

-Are they sitcom catchphrases?

-Could be.

-I don't know.

-Do you want one more?

-Yeah, we need another one.

-Next, please.

That's all we've got, isn't it?

Oh, are they translations of foreign titles of British sitcoms?

-That's a good answer, let's go for that.

-Are you sure?

-It's a wild guess.

-No, let's do that.

-BELL

-Foreign translations of UK sitcom titles.

-I agree with you, Mike.

It is a good answer.

It's not the right answer, but it's a very good answer.

What's the right answer?

There's a chance for a bonus for you, Francophiles.

Let's have a look at the last clue. What do you think it is?

THEY WHISPER

They are transliterations of bird calls.

-Transliterations of bird calls?

-That is just what they are.

That is the last one, it's a little bit of a giveaway.

A little bit of bread and no cheese. Do you know what birds?

-I don't know.

-I have no idea.

-Tit?

I beg your pardon?!

There's no need for that language. If you don't know, you don't know.

"My toe bleeds, Betty. My TOE bleeds, Betty."

A wood pigeon, of course! It was uncanny, wasn't it?

I transformed into one. Great tit, "Teacher! Teacher!"

Barred owl, apparently, "Who cooks for you?"

"A little bit of bread and no cheese," that's a famous one.

-Do you know what bird that's meant to be?

-Is it a robin?

-Yellowhammer.

Close, though.

So you get the bonus, Francophiles, and the chance to choose a question.

-Horned Viper.

-Why not? Why not indeed?

What is the connection between these clues? Here's the first.

-Two countries that probably share...

-Next.

Their flags are the same, aren't they?

Ireland and the Ivory Coast, the flags are the same.

Do you want to get another one?

-Do you want to go for it? If you're confident...

-They are the same.

-OK, go for it.

-BELL

-They share the same flags.

-Have another go.

Their flags are the same...

Same colours, but reversed?

I'm going to take it because you are so very close to what it is.

They do share flags, but you have to rotate them, that's what it is.

They are the same image and the same colours,

but you rotate one to get the other, so I will accept it

and coming in after two clues, you get three points. Well done.

-Back to you, Fell Walkers.

-Two Reeds, please.

These are going to be picture clues. What do they have in common?

Here's the first.

-Battersea Power Station. Pink Floyd?

-Should we go next?

-Next, please.

-Pink Floyd albums.

-Do you think so?

-I don't know.

-Do you know what...?

-I have no idea what the handshake signifies.

-Next, please.

-Pink Floyd albums, yeah.

-BELL

-Pink Floyd albums.

-That is certainly the connection, I'll give it to you.

-What precisely, though...?

-Album covers?

Yeah, they are versions of images that appear on those covers.

You will see versions of Battersea Power Station, a handshake, a wall,

and a prism. Do you know which albums?

-Obviously wall is The Wall.

-Animals?

Is Battersea Power Station, that's right.

-Dark Side Of The Moon, bottom right.

-That's the prism.

-Is it Wish You Were Here?

-It is Wish You Were Here.

-Good Pink Floyd knowledge.

-Thank you.

-Back to you, Francophiles, to pick a question.

-Lion, please.

Music question, of course. And with delight you greet it!

What is the connection between these clues? Here's the first.

# Close Madame's room We've parted... #

Next.

# Winding down that old familiar path... #

It sounds like Bing Crosby.

It's not Bing Crosby, it's Perry Como or something.

-It sounds like...

-What is the song? Next.

# Here's to the girls who play wife

# Aren't they too much... #

-Doris Day or something?

-I don't know. Next.

# You say the world has come between us... #

Do you know who that is?

-Sounds like Bob Dylan. What are we going to say?

-Springsteen?

-Three seconds.

-BELL

-Countries in a title.

-For example?

Er, America.

Yes, none of them has a country in the title,

so I'm afraid that's not it.

Fell Walkers, do you want to have a go for a bonus?

Are they named after movies?

That's not it either.

We heard Dinner For One Please, James,

Suppertime, The Ladies Who Lunch and Breakfast At Tiffany's.

They are meal times.

I was interested to note, Francophiles,

you thought the second one sounded like Bing Crosby.

I think that was me who said that, yeah.

-Yeah, that was Johnny Cash.

-Oh, was it? Oh!

No points there, but there is one remaining question.

That's for you, Fell Walkers. It's the Water question.

What's the connection between these clues? Here's the first.

Associated Press, they're owned...

-Sort of like Daily Mail and things, so...

-Next.

It's a drink, isn't it?

It's cranberry juice, but...

-No idea. I can't see any connection.

-Next, please.

-It's a socialist newspaper.

-Yeah...

Again, I'm struggling.

-There's a newspaper link between one and three, but...

-Next.

Oh, they are cooperatives?

-Three seconds.

-BELL

They are all cooperatives.

They are cooperatives, companies where the owners

and the workers are the same. Well done.

-John Lewis the giveaway there, I think.

-Yeah.

At the end of round one, the Fell Walkers have got

three points, but the Francophiles are ahead with six.

Round two, the sequences round.

There are still four clues, but only three of them will be shown,

at the most, because my question is, what comes fourth?

Francophiles, you'll be going first again.

-Which hieroglyph would you like?

-Eye of Horus.

Interesting choice. What would come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

£1050. Erm... £1050.

-Not two monkeys and two ponies or something?

-Next.

-That's an oak, so...

-Quercus genus specimens is an oak.

-Probably go next.

-Next.

That's a derby. Oh, it's the...

So what's...? St Leger?

-That's the 1,000 Guineas, so it's the St Leger.

-St Leger, yeah.

BELL St Leger.

Is the answer and I'll accept it.

Can you think of another way of expressing that?

-A one-mile, six-furlong classic at Doncaster.

-That sort of thing!

We went for a traditional day to buy shares.

You know the expression, it's something like...

Buy on St Leger's Day, yeah.

Buy and go away in May, come back on St Leger's Day.

Might be sell and go away in May,

but that's a good day to buy shares, apparently.

-1,050, that's 1,000 Guineas. Quercus genus specimens, what's that?

-Oaks.

-That the Oaks and bowler hat in America?

-Derby.

-The Derby.

And the next big horse race chronologically, the St Leger.

Well done. Over to you then, Fell Walkers.

-What would you like?

-Horned Viper, please.

-The Horned Viper.

What would be the fourth in this sequence? Here's the first.

Next, please.

That's Rihanna and Billy Joel.

-OK.

-Next, I guess.

-Next, please.

Number ones. Christmas number ones.

Are we going on Christmas number ones on certain songs...

-Are those the ones that have sold the most?

-What's the next one?

They are nowhere near consecutive, so what sold the most at Christmas...

-I don't know.

-What is the biggest ever Christmas number one?

What was that one the other year?

-Give me a Christmas number one.

-Three seconds.

-We Are The World.

-BELL

-Four, We Are The World.

Not the answer, I'm afraid. A bonus chance for the Francophiles.

Is it four, Can You Build It, Bob The Builder?

-And why would that be the answer?

-I don't know,

we're just thinking of songs that were number one about ten years ago.

And that's how we do things, really.

Stuff that happened around sort of then.

That's not it and they are not all Christmas number ones either.

What the number relates to is the number of times that it was

number one, so Umbrella was number one once,

Uptown Girl twice, Do They Know It's Christmas? third

and something that was number one four times,

Unchained Melody we went for.

OK, no points there,

but Francophiles, you can now choose a question.

-Lion.

-Lion, OK.

I'll show you the first in the sequence.

I want to know what's fourth. Your time starts now.

-OK, could be periods.

-Could be.

-Composing or architecture...

Will we have the next one? Next, please.

Classical, Baroque and then... Renaissance? Renaissance.

-Shall we get the next one first?

-Get the next one.

-Next.

Renaissance, Renaissance.

BELL Renaissance.

-Is the correct answer and why is that?

-That's cool.

-The connection?

-It's the...

Periods of classical music going backwards from the 19th century.

Exactly what it is. Musical epochs going backwards.

-Fell Walkers, what takes your fancy?

-Water this time.

A delicious drop of Water. What would you expect to see fourth?

Here's your first clue.

-One in eight. Are those inclines?

-OK.

Next, please.

Oh, no.

Next, please.

Seven...

I have absolutely no idea.

No, this is where we stab blindly.

Erm...

-19 to 21?

-Let's have a go.

-Three seconds.

-BELL

-19 to 21.

-Not the answer, I'm afraid,

so a chance to you, Francophiles.

19 to...28.

That's not it either. What do you think it is?

Not a clue, actually.

Not a clue. This is nasty.

This is nasty like standing on an upturned plug, this question.

The last letter of one is E,

the next number that starts with E is eight.

Eight ends with a T, which starts ten.

Ten ends with an N, that starts 19.

19 ends with an N and the next number up that starts with N?

90.

So 19 to 90 was the fourth clue.

You see it or you don't.

Unlucky.

-Francophiles, your turn to choose.

-Two Reeds.

-Two Reeds.

What do you expect to see in the fourth picture,

because these are picture clues? Here is the first.

I have no idea. Next.

Who's that?

Next.

-Peaches.

-It's not Geldof's...?

-Oh, Peaches Geldof.

-What's the name?

-Fifi Trixibelle... Is that right?

Go for it, I suppose, if we have nothing else.

-We've got a few seconds.

-Is it something...?

Yeah, maybe something like that.

-Should we go for it?

-BELL

Fifi Trixibelle.

You've almost told me more than you need to.

I'll accept it, though. Fifi.

Now, I think you know the connection, which is that

these are Paula Yates's daughters in order of age,

but again, we've put something that isn't actually Fifi here.

Fifi And The Flowertots, a character.

-You didn't recognise the person in the second picture?

-No.

-It's Pixie Lott.

-Oh!

Those daughters are Tiger Lily, Pixie,

Peaches and the oldest is Fifi. But you get the point

because you got the answer. Well done.

Fell Walkers, the Twisted Flax remains for you.

Let's hope it doesn't tangle up in knots. Here's your first clue.

Is it some sort of...musical note?

-Maybe, but I don't see the connection.

-Next, please.

Oh, is it F, fluorine, Cl, is that chlorine? I don't know.

-Bromine, brown.

-Which way do they go? Next, please.

Bromine, dark red. So what comes after that?

-Is it sodium?

-Sodium?

-Bright orange.

-Which one?

-Iodine?

-Are you sure?

-No, I'm not.

-Three seconds.

I'm not sure at all. BELL

Erm... Na, bright orange.

Not the answer, so another bonus chance for the Francophiles.

We think it's I and brown?

You're closer, but I can't take it.

Now, the answer I want is I: purple.

These are the colours of the halogens.

We are going down group seven in the periodic table.

I thought it was brown as well, no?

Brown and purple, I'm afraid, are different colours.

What would you say this delightful gentleman is wearing?

-What colour is that jumper?

-That's lavender.

-Brown, I'd say.

-I'd have accepted lavender.

What a shame you didn't reach for it. Brown it most certainly is not.

Different colours. Purple, iodine is purple. So no points there.

At the end of round two, the Fell Walkers have got three points,

but the Francophiles are ahead with 12.

Time for the connecting wall, that terrifying mass

of jumbled clues that needs to be sorted into four neat groups.

Fell Walkers, you're going first this time.

-You've got a choice, Lion or Water.

-We'll go for Lion again.

OK, two and a half minutes is the amount of time you have,

starting now.

OK, bong, ding dong and peal are all bells. Anything else?

-Knell?

-Knell.

BUZZ

Mystic River, that's a film.

Bad Boys is a film.

Keep going.

Milk was a film.

I don't know.

Milk and dehorn, something you can do to cattle,

as is rustle and slaughter.

So... Shall we say milk, slaughter, dehorn...

and rustle? BUZZ

No, but we can also raise cattle, can't we?

Anything else you can see?

-Er...

-Mystic River, Bad Boys...

Three strikes and you're out, remember.

-Colours. Colours is a film, isn't it?

-Let's just press something now.

Colours, Bad Boys, Mystic River, did you say? The Game is a film,

so peal, blare...

Is this a word one, do you think?

You can spell them differently.

Lore, can you spell that differently? Yeah, L-A-W.

Russell, you can spell differently.

-Shall we go for The Game being the other film?

-Yes, I think so.

You've solved the wall. That's four immediate points for the groups.

Let's look for the connections. Tell me about the first group.

They're all ringing, words for ringing.

Yes, bell sounds, that's what it is. And the next one, the green drip?

-Things you can do with cows.

-That's right. It seems cruel mixture.

Milk and raise, that's all nice. Dehorn and slaughter?!

Feels like a trip to Only Connect.

A bit of milking, a bit of dehorning and slaughtering.

-Next group, the pink one.

-They are films.

Beyond that, I don't know what's the connection between the films.

I'm afraid there is another connection

and this is for a place in the semi-final.

'80s Brat Pack?

That's not really it, no.

No, because, you know, The Game is 1997, Michael Douglas.

-No, they are films starring Sean Penn.

-Oh, right, OK.

Sean Penn, that's the connection. He's in all of those.

And the last group, the turquoise.

Words that can be spelled differently and sound the same.

You see, that applies to all words.

I'm going to need something much more specific.

Names of directors...

Prime ministers, sorry, prime ministers, yeah.

You suddenly saw it. They are prime ministers.

Let me tell you the problem with your previous answer.

Blare can only be spelled another way if it's a name,

there isn't another word blare, but peal, lore, blare, rustle,

homophones for prime ministers' names.

Which ones? Let's hear some first names.

-Robert Peel.

-Yes.

-Andrew Bonar Law.

-That's the one.

-Tony Blair.

-Everyone's favourite.

And...the other one.

Well, he was a peer, of course. Earl Russell, John his name was.

John Russell. So that is correct,

they are homophones for prime ministers' names.

Four points for the groups you found,

three more for the connections.

That is a total of seven points.

Let's bring back the Francophiles, give them a connecting wall

and see what they can do with it.

New clues, of course, similar principle of solution.

It's the Water wall for you, Francophiles.

"Le mur de l'eau," as you almost certainly don't say it in French.

You've got two and a half minutes to solve it, starting now.

OK, chess terms. Endgame, stalemate... Try those.

BUZZ No, what else could it be?

King, I suppose.

Castle, Castle.

Gambit, stalemate.

-Endgame is a play, isn't it?

-A play by Beckett.

-Happy Days?

-Which other ones? Rockaby?

-I'm not sure.

-Footfalls.

Sir John Houblon was the governor of the Bank...

-And Eddie George.

-And Mervyn King.

-Governors of the Bank of England, then.

-What about Rockaby?

Oh, Leigh-Pemberton!

Three strikes and you're out. Plenty of time.

-Angel.

-So Endgame...

And Happy Days, so we've got Cyclops...

I know what these are, they are X-Men.

Cyclops, Storm, Rogue and one other. I think probably Angel.

Yeah, so these are Beckett plays. OK, OK.

That's it, you've solved the wall.

Four points immediately for the groups.

Let's look for the connections. First group?

-They are all chess terms.

-They are chess terms. Do you all play?

-Yeah.

-A little bit.

-I've won a couple of competitions, many, many years ago.

Really? A chess winner! Can you tell me what the moves are?

En passant is a pawn move when...

You can take a pawn without going onto the square

because when it moves two, the first move of the game,

you can take it as if it only moved one.

-Exactly.

-Stalemate is when nobody can win.

-Gambit is a way...

-It's an opening, isn't it?

Isn't it when you sacrifice a piece to get a better position? And then...

I'm taking your word for all of this.

When I play, whether you can get the end

without throwing the bishop in someone's eye is all I question.

I'm sure if that's not right, people will write in.

-Let's move onto the next group.

-They are governors of the Bank of England.

They are governors of the Bank of England.

-Can you tell me their first names?

-Mervyn King.

-Robin Leigh-Pemberton, Eddie George.

-And John Houblon.

-Who...

He used to be on the £50 note until recently.

The one thing that quizzers all know, who appears on the banknotes.

Quite right. What about this next one - Cyclops, Storm, Rogue, Angel?

-They are all members of the X-Men.

-Very well done.

Can you tell me more about them? I'm having to look this up, too.

Chess and X-Men, right in my blind spot.

Cyclops is the guy who, whenever he takes his visor off,

-has a big red laser that comes out of his eyes.

-He sounds brilliant.

Storm is the girl who can control the elements,

Rogue is the redheaded girl

who, if she touches people,

it throws them the other side of the room.

Apparently she has the ability to absorb the powers of others.

Imagine if I had that power,

I would know everything in the world, the teams I've stood near.

-What about Angel?

-I'm not sure who Angel is, actually.

A mutant with wings, apparently. Lovely.

Not a thing to put on a dating website as a self-description.

What about that last turquoise group?

We think they are all plays by Samuel Beckett.

Plays by Samuel Beckett. Very well done.

Four points for the groups you found.

Four more points for the connections.

You get the bonus two for getting it all right.

That is a maximum of ten.

Let's see what that does to the scores.

And if you love nothing more than unjumbling your chess moves

from your Beckett plays, you'll find more connecting walls

on our website, where you can also write your own.

Missing vowels time here, though, of course. You know how this works.

Fingers on buzzers, teams.

This will decide who goes straight to the semi-final

and who has to take the scenic route.

The first group are all...

-BELL

-Walkers.

-Sue Perkins.

-Correct.

-BELL

-Walkers.

-Eric Idle.

-Correct.

-BELL

-Francophiles.

-Richard Ayoade.

-Correct.

-BELL

-Francophiles.

-David Mitchell.

-Well, indeed!

Next category...

-BELL

-Walkers.

-Time, gentlemen, please.

-Correct.

-BELL

-Francophiles.

Pint on the house?

That's not it, you lose a point. Fell Walkers, a possible bonus.

Too long. It's, "Pint of the usual?" Next clue.

Too posh for you guys. This is, "Ice and a slice?"

Next clue.

-BELL

-Walkers.

-You're barred.

-That's more like it!

Next category...

-BELL

-Francophiles.

-Guatemala.

-Correct.

-BELL

-Francophiles.

-Federated States of Micronesia.

-Brilliant.

-BELL

-Francophiles.

-Equatorial Guinea.

-Yes, it is.

-BELL

-Francophiles.

-Florida.

-Correct.

Next category...

-BELL

-Walkers.

-Little black dress.

-Correct.

-BELL

-Walkers.

-Plain white T.

-Yes.

END-OF-ROUND JINGLE

Well, that last one was Ascot hat.

I always wear one, although I've never been to Ascot.

But that bell means it's the end of the quiz

and looking at the final scores,

the Fell Walkers finished with 16 points,

but the Francophiles are the winners with 27.

Very well done. You guys are straight through to the semi-final.

You, Fell Walkers, are going to have to

win another game to get yourselves there,

but we'll all be meeting again sooner or later.

Please join me next time for another episode of Only Connect,

the quiz that is a proven aid to warding off Alzheimer's,

even if it does make you feel like you've got it already.

Goodbye.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd