Episode 6 Pointless Celebrities

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thank you very much. I'm Alexander Armstrong and a very warm welcome

to special celebrity edition of Pointless, the quiz show

that puts obscure knowledge to the test.

Now, every single question on Pointless has been asked to 100 people before the show.

To be in with a chance of winning our final round jackpot,

our celebrities need to come up with the answers that the fewest of those 100 people could think of.

Let's meet today's Pointless celebrities.

First up, we welcome Mark Millar and Julia Kendall.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Of course, we know you both from DIY SOS.

So all those DIY SOS-type questions you're going to have completely sewn up, aren't you?

-Well, we hope so, but...

-They won't come up, will they?

-They won't come up. We won't have any of them, will we?

-I've no idea.

It's in the hands of the big man. Who knows?

Julia, what would you like to see? Nominate something you'd love to see.

-What would be your perfect Pointless category?

-Music's kind of all right.

-Good. What kind of music?

-Classical. Opera maybe. Except, of course,

-something like that might come up and I'll make a complete idiot of myself.

-I'm sure you won't.

-I'm sure you will.

-I'm sure you won't.

-Mark, anything you'd particularly not like to see come up?

-Geography.

I never know where I am.

I just wandered round Belfast to get a pint of milk one morning and I ended up here.

Anyway, listen, it's great to have you on the show.

-Thank you very much for coming on. Very, very best of luck.

-Thank you.

Next, please welcome Rachel Riley and Mark Durden-Smith.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-Now, of course, Rachel, we know you from Countdown.

-Hopefully.

And, Mark, we know you from countless things.

That's very kind of you to say so.

-You're probably wondering why we are together.

-It has crossed my mind.

-We were both at maths genius club...

-Yes, we were.

..and I was doing the catering.

-Mark comes on Countdown as one of his many programs.

-Do you?

To pretend I'm clever.

But I've always got a dictionary in front of me, so it's quite easy.

-She's very clever.

-We know you are very clever. You are very clever.

Well, if anything...

numbers one through 100, 1,000, even, come up,

-I'll be all right.

-All the way up to 1,000.

-Steady on. Up to four figures.

Very best of luck to you. It's great to have you on the show.

And, next, please welcome Sonia and Mark Moses.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Sonia, we know you from Eurovision and being an '80s singing sensation.

-Would you like to introduce your teammate?

-This is my hubby, Mark.

We've been together... We met at school, actually,

when we were both 16. Yeah. We've been together 25 years now.

That's amazing. Now, then, Mark, what are you hoping is going to come up today?

What's going to be your dream Pointless topic?

Maybe a bit of geography or just general knowledge.

-No literature cos I'm terrible.

-No literature.

-Sonia, obviously music is going to be strong for you.

-Yes.

-What else?

-I love my soap operas.

-Good.

-I love Coronation Street, in particular.

I love all the celebrity goss and the reality shows

-and stuff like that.

-You and Richard both.

So I'm hoping that will come up. And films. We love our films.

Very good indeed. Welcome to the show, Sonia and Mark.

It's lovely to have you here. Very best of luck.

And, finally, we've got Gareth Thomas and Andrew Stone.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Well, Gareth, obviously, we know you, Welsh rugby legend.

And, Andrew, we know you from Pineapple Dance Studios.

And much more importantly, the front man of Starman.

-I'm solo now.

-You've gone solo? How's it going?

It's going well, really well.

I'm releasing in America and here soon.

Gareth, how on earth do you know Andrew Stone?

-Where did your paths cross?

-Well, I was a roadie for Starman.

-We've all done that.

-Obviously.

-We were in, briefly, the Big Brother house together.

-Thanks for that.

-Who left first?

-I knew this question was going to come up. I did.

This isn't part of the quiz.

-I did.

-Did you?

-Yes.

So, Gareth, obviously sport, rugby, in particular.

-What else is going to be good for you?

-Maybe pop music.

What's your favourite artist? Your favourite pop artist?

I like this One Direction at the moment. They're kind of cool.

-They're big, big friends of the show.

-We love One Direction.

-Sorry, the show's big friends of theirs.

-I'm not sure they're particularly aware of us.

-My favourite...

-I'm sure they are.

-No, they are. Zayn, Zayn is a big fan.

-Is he?

-Yeah, Zayn loves it.

-Zayn...?

-You're more of a Harry fan, aren't you?

Harry... Yeah, Harry. And the little one with the face like a pie.

-Niall.

-Little Niall.

-Tiny Niall.

-With a face like a pie.

Caution - filling may be hot.

Listen, Gareth and Andrew, it's lovely to have you on the show.

A warm welcome and very, very best of luck.

We look forward to discovering all your hidden knowledge throughout the show.

There's only one person left for me to introduce.

You can barely tell he's had botox. He's my Pointless friend.

-He's Richard.

-Hiya.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-How are you?

-Seldom better.

-Well, this should be fun, shouldn't it?

-Yeah. I think great fun.

-I'm going to make a fairly confident prediction today.

-Yep.

I think Mark is going to win. That's my opinion.

I have to say, I always like it on these shows

when someone brings a daughter or a husband or something like that

-cos it gives you more insight into a celebrity's life.

-Love that.

Also, you see a proper row cos celebrities are always lovely people...

But as soon as it's husband and wife, it's always my favourite.

And Round One, DIY SOS Mark is not going to like.

-But Round Two, I think everyone's going to like.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

All our questions on Pointless were put to 100 people before the show.

But we're looking for the obscure answers they didn't get.

To be in with a chance of winning our jackpot,

our celebrities must score as few points as possible.

Now, what everyone's trying to do, of course, is to find a pointless answer,

an answer none of our 100 people gave. Each time that happens, we will add 250 quid to the jackpot.

As today's show is a celebrity special

and each of our celebrities is playing for a nominated charity,

we start off with a jackpot of £2,500.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Right. If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

Now, in this first round, each of you must give me one answer

and you cannot confer with your partner.

Whichever pair has the highest score at the end of the round

will be eliminated, so try and make sure it's not you.

If you give me an incorrect answer, you will score the maximum of 100 points, so try and avoid those. OK.

Our first category today is

-US Geography, Mark.

-No!

US Geography. Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, can you please step up to the podium?

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name

as many US states that end in a vowel as they could.

US states that end in a vowel. Richard.

Quite simply, you're looking for any US state which ends in a vowel.

-Mark Durden-Smith, that's A, E, I, O, U.

-Don't pick on me.

Pick on the big rugby player. They're always a bit brainless.

-Oooh.

-Oh, wow. OK.

-Getting nasty, isn't it?

-I would pick on Sonia rather than Gareth.

-I really would.

-He's so on it.

Sonia's one of my heroes. I can't do that.

-I love Sonia.

-Right. Now, then, Mark and Julia,

you all drew lots before the show and today you get to go first.

So US states that end in a vowel.

I'm going to go for...

Minnesota.

-I knew you were going to say that. I was thinking that one.

-Good call.

-Don't ask me to spell it.

-I shan't.

-Thanks.

OK. Minnesota, says Mark. Good call, says Julia.

Let's see if it's right and if it is, let's how many people said it. Minnesota.

It's right.

4.

APPLAUSE

That's an excellent answer and an excellent score, Mark.

-Very well done. Richard.

-Great start to the show, Mark. Terrific answer.

-Known as the Gopher State or the North Star State.

-Mark.

I will say...

-..Hawaii.

-Hawaii. Let's see if it's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said Hawaii.

12.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

12 for Hawaii.

Yes, the Aloha State. You should get less points for it.

-It ends in three vowels. Hawaii.

-Surely.

-That's pretty good.

Good. Now, then, Mark... for a change...

Mark, we're looking for a US state that ends in a vowel.

As ever, of course, you're trying to find the one you think the fewest of our 100 people knew.

OK. There's a couple that I'm thinking of. Which is the least one?

-I'll say North Dakota.

-North Dakota.

That sounds particularly good in a Liverpudlian accent, doesn't it?

-North Dakota. Just one more time.

-North Dakota.

-Yeah, that's good.

OK. Let's see if it's right and if it is, how many of our 100 people said North Dakota.

It's right.

Look at that! 5.

APPLAUSE

5.

-A great score.

-Very well played, Mark.

A good start to the show. It's the Flickertail State, North Dakota.

-I don't need to tell you that.

-No, you don't.

Rugby, North Dakota, supposed to be the very centre of North America.

There we are. Thank you very much indeed. Now, then, Gareth.

-Remember, we are looking for US states that end in a vowel.

-Now, I think it's a state...

Is Iowa a state?

Let's find out.

Iowa, is it a state and if it is, how many people said it?

-Absolutely right, Gareth.

-Yes!

7.

7 for Iowa.

Good answer.

He's just delighted to beat Mark, isn't he?

That's all I wanted.

The Hawkeye State. That's a very good first round from everybody. Very well played.

Thank you very much. Let's have a look at the scores as we're halfway through the round.

Mark and Julia, 4. Lovely. Looking very safe there indeed.

Up to 5 for Mark and Sonia.

And Andrew and Gareth on 7.

And then, whoa, up to 12. Oh!

-So, Rachel...

-Painful.

-Thank God for you.

-I've got to do the heavy lifting.

-Yeah, we need that. We're going to come back down the line.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK. We are looking for American states that end in a vowel.

Now, then, Andrew, the high-scorers on 12 are Rachel and Mark. You're on 7.

A score of 4 or less from you

will definitely see you into the next round.

-You know I'm dyslexic so I'm hoping I get this right.

-OK.

Um, Orlando.

-Orlando.

-What are you smiling for?

Oh, dear.

-It's come up before, Orlando.

-Has it?

I don't think it was right then either.

-Unlucky, bud.

-OK. Orlando.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said Orlando.

Bad luck, Andrew. I'm sorry. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

Takes your total up to 107. It's scored you 100. I'm sorry. Richard.

Sorry, Andrew. It's a city, not a state, Orlando.

-It is in America, though.

-Yes.

Now, then, Sonia. I've got some great news.

The high-scorers are on 107.

You're on 5. You are through whatever happens.

Even if you score 100 points, you are still in the game.

-Nevada.

-Nevada. Nevada.

-Have you played Nevada?

-We got married in Nevada.

You got married...?! Fantastic.

-Wouldn't forget that, would you?

-No, you certainly won't. OK. Nevada.

Let's see if it's right and if it is, how many people said it. Nevada.

Absolutely right.

8 for Nevada. Very well done. Takes your total up to 13.

Well played, Sonia. Very good answer. Very good team work as well.

It's interesting you got married in Nevada,

yet it wasn't the first state that came to Mark's mind.

-I never thought of that.

-What have you been up to in North Dakota, Mark?

I think I heard a song once.

That's why I like having husband and wife teams on the show.

Cos you can start stuff like that. Thanks very much, Richard.

Now, then, Rachel. Andrew has thrown you a lifeline there, quite frankly.

They are on 107. You are on 12 which means...

-Listen, you know you don't have to explain the maths to Rachel, don't you?

-I know!

-You know this anyway, but 94 or less.

-OK.

Um...

I'm going to go for Georgia.

Georgia. Is it right? How many people said it?

Absolutely right and you are through. Well done.

6.

Cracking score. Takes your total up to 18.

Well played, Rachel. The Empire State of the South.

Its motto is Wisdom, Justice, and Moderation.

LAUGHTER

Thanks very much, Richard. Julia, more good news.

-You are through to the next round whatever happens.

-Phew.

You will not overtake Andrew and Gareth's high score.

That's probably a good thing.

-OK. Let's try Louisiana.

-Louisiana.

Let's see if it's right and if it is, how many people said it.

It's right.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

What about that?! 5.

It scores you 1 and gives you a total of 5. That's your total!

-Single figures. The best answer of the round.

-Well played, Julia.

The Pelican State. If you're playing along at home, there were five answers

which would have scored one point. Well done if you said any of these. Let's take a look.

Montana, Missouri, Louisiana - all of those would have scored you 1.

As would Pennsylvania and New Hampshire.

So very well done if you said any of those.

Just to clear up, Orlando is a city in Florida, I'm afraid. Florida would have been a good answer.

Florida would have got you 22 points. It would still have knocked you out,

but it would have been a correct answer.

Thanks very much, Richard. So at the end of the first round,

the losing pair with the highest score, I'm afraid it's Andrew and Gareth.

Oh, dear. I'm sorry. It was a tough call, that one.

-Have you been to the States much, Andrew?

-I've been to New York.

-And LA.

-Just no places that end in a vowel.

-No!

I'm so sorry. It means we have to say goodbye to you, far too soon.

The answers they gave were amazing. I'd have probably said those

if I'd have known more and still gone out, so well done.

Well, it's been lovely having you on the show. We release you back into the community.

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Obviously, there's only room for two celebrity pairs

in our head-to-head round, so one of the teams in front of me now

will be leaving us at the end of this round. OK.

Our category for Round Two is...

Music Awards.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going first, who's going second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

-OK.

-Our Round Two question concerns...

-Oh, no.

-Winners of the Grammy for Record of the Year. Richard.

On each pass, we're going to show you the names of six famous songs

that won the Grammy for Record of the Year. We'll also give you the year in which they won it.

We just need you to tell us which group or artist won the Grammy

with that song in that year. Very best of luck.

-12 in all to have a go at home.

-So here we are.

We are looking for the artist that had a hit with each of these

Grammy-winning records. And we have got on our list...

I'll read those all one final time.

There we are. Six Grammy award-winning records.

You just have to say which artist released them. Julia.

-Hmmm.

-Julia.

-Alexander.

-Are you happy with that?

-Er, yeah...

-Are you?

-There's a couple.

-I do know a couple.

-This is good.

I'm going to go with The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face.

I think it was Roberta Flack.

Roberta Flack for The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people knew that answer. Roberta Flack.

Absolutely right.

It's a great answer, Julia. Well done. Single figures. 9.

Lovely low score. Roberta Flack.

Good answer, Julia. Great answer in the first round, another great answer there.

-Written by Ewan MacColl.

-Now, then, Rachel.

Well, I think I know three of the other ones.

I'm going with Use Somebody and Kings of Leon.

Kings of Leon, Use Somebody, says Rachel. Kings of Leon.

Let's see if it's right and if it is, let's see how many people knew that answer. Kings of Leon.

Absolutely right, Rachel. Brilliant answer.

15.

-15. Good answer. Good score. Kings of Leon.

-Well played, Rachel.

Another good answer. A number two hit in the UK. Kings of Leon.

-The Followill family.

-There we go. Mark.

Mark. You're the last person to have this board.

You can talk us through it if you like and fill in all the blanks.

I think I know all of the others. I think U2 is the top.

Hotel California is the Eagles.

And Simon and Garfunkel, Mrs Robinson.

-I think I'll go for...

-You've missed one out.

-I've realised I don't know that one.

-Oh, right.

I think I'll go for...

..U2. Beautiful day.

OK. Beautiful Day, U2, you are saying.

OK. Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how many people said U2.

Absolutely right.

Wow. 32.

Extraordinary. 32. Very high score for that. Great song, obviously.

Well played, Mark. You filled in the board very nicely as well

and you picked the right one of the ones you knew.

Because Hotel California, absolutely right, was by the Eagles, but that would have scored you 49.

Mrs Robinson is Simon and Garfunkel, that would have scored you 41.

Now, the best answer on the board, is Need You Now,

a band who are much bigger in the States than they are over here -

a country act, Lady Antebellum. Would have scored four points.

Very well done if you said that. To give you an idea of how many Grammys they give out...

They also won the Grammy for the best country performance by a duo

-or group with vocals. That's specific, isn't it?

-Isn't it?!

-We should enter that.

-I think we won it in 2004.

-So we did! There we go.

-Just beat Sonia and Mark, didn't we?

-Yeah, we did. Heady days.

OK. We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at the scores as they stand. Julia and Mark,

looking amazingly strong. Another very strong turn from them.

Nice low score of 9.

Then we come up to 15, where we find Rachel and Mark

looking pretty strong. Then Sonia and Mark on 32.

Sonia, luckily,

you couldn't be more at home in this category if you tried.

And you get first pick of the next board. So you're going to have to find a really low score

and hope that's enough to keep you in the game. Very best of luck.

We're going to come back down the line. Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK. We're going to put six more songs on the board and here they come.

Good luck. We have got...

I was wondering if I could just say them altogether

and turn it into one big, long lyric.

Don't know why, what's love got to do with it?

Strangers in the night, rolling in the deep, I honestly love you just the way you are.

APPLAUSE

And the good news is, you've just won a Grammy.

Wow.

Now, Sonia.

-Um, Tina Turner, What's Love Got To Do With It?

-OK. You are on 32.

You are the high-scorers.

You're saying Tina Turner, What's Love Got To Do With It?

Let's see. Tina Turner, is it right? How many people said it?

Absolutely right.

40.

40. Takes your total up to 72. Richard.

Pretty big score for that song.

It's also the title of the film of her life as well. Tina Turner.

Now, then, Mark.

-HE SIGHS

-Oh, no!

It's just such a shame.

She's so clever. Can't you get someone else in to do this question?

I'm only confident of one.

So I'm going to say...

Adele, Rolling in the Deep, because it's the only one I know.

Rolling in the Deep, Adele, says Mark.

OK. Here's your red line.

That's what you want to be getting below.

The high-scorers on 72, Sonia and Mark.

You want to be getting 56 or less. Adele. Rolling in the Deep.

Is it right? How many people said it?

Absolutely right.

You've done it! 41.

Very well done indeed. Good work.

41 takes your total up to 56 and sees you into the head-to-head.

-Good work, Mark.

-Yes, the Record Of The Year, 2012.

Again, a number two hit just like Use Somebody.

She broke every single sales record going, Adele. Both sides of the Atlantic. Amazing.

Amazing. Now, then, Mark. You're on 9.

The high scorers on 72 are Mark and Sonia.

That means a score of 62 or less keeps you in the game.

Remember, we are looking for the groups or artists who had

hit records with these Grammy-winning singles.

-I actually don't know any of them. I'm going to have to guess.

-Oh, no. Don't!

-I'm in a state of shock.

-No!

-I don't recognise any of them.

-Oh, no. Come on.

-Honestly, I don't.

I Honestly Love You...

but that was 1974 and things have changed since then.

LAUGHTER

Just The Way You Are...

Is it Elvis Costello?

Just The Way You Are, Elvis Costello, says Mark.

Is it right? How many people said it?

Bad luck, Mark. Bad luck. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

-It scores you 100 points.

-I'm sorry.

-I knew I shouldn't have brought you!

-She's turned already.

-Sorry, Mark. Not Elvis Costello.

It was Billy Joel. Just The Way You Are.

# Just the way you are. #

-Remember?

-No, I don't remember.

-Julia, what would you have gone for for Strangers in the Night?

-That would have been...

It's one of the old crooners. Isn't that Frank Sinatra?

It is Frank Sinatra. Absolutely right.

That would have scored 24 points. Would have seen you safely through.

-Don't Know Why from 2002. Xander, do you know that one?

-No.

-It was Norah Jones.

-Norah Jones. Of course!

Would have scored you four points.

-And I Honestly Love You. This is the best answer on the board.

-No.

-Olivia Newton-John is the answer. Three points.

-There we are.

Thanks very much, Richard. So at the end of Round Two, the losing celebrity pair...

-Mark, you're not going to be forgiven.

-I know I'm not.

-No.

I know I'm not. I just hope Mark wins.

-Frank Sinatra, you can hear it now, can't you?

-Of course I can.

I think Julia thinks it would be better if it was DIY.

And Mark is thinking SOS.

LAUGHTER

-Mark and Julia, it's been brilliant having you on the show.

-Thank you.

Thanks so much for coming. Lovely contestants.

But for the remaining two celebrity pairs, things are about to get

even more exciting now as we enter the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Rachel and Mark, Sonia and Mark.

You are now only one round away from the final

and a chance to play for the jackpot which currently stands at £2,500.

You are now going to go head-to-head and the first pair to win two questions

will be playing for that jackpot.

The great news is, from here on in, you're allowed to confer.

You are now a team. Or two teams.

Sonia and Mark, you had a bit of a lifeline thrown there, didn't you?

We did. I thought that was it for us.

And Mark Durden-Smith, you need to pull your socks up.

Rachel has been carrying me through the first two rounds.

I knew nothing about geography or music, so I'm glad they're out of the way.

Geography and music, both came up and you excelled.

-A nice question about maths now would be appreciated.

-Yes, please.

Perfect. Very good. Well, the very best of luck to both pairs.

Let's play the head-to-head.

Here comes your first question and it concerns...

Superhero Nemeses.

Ooh.

-Superhero Nemeses. Richard.

-Yes.

We're going to show you five images of villains from superhero films.

Can you identify them and pick the most obscure, please?

We're looking for their villain name, not their human name.

-Good.

-Villain name.

-Villain name. OK. Let's reveal our five villains.

And here they come. We have got...

There we are. Now, Rachel and Mark, you've played best

throughout the show so far, so you get to go first.

-OK.

-OK.

Shall we go for it? OK.

We're going to go with Magneto. Number E. Or letter E, rather!

She's obsessed by numbers.

-Letter

-E. Letter E, Magneto.

Magneto, letter E, say Rachel and Mark. Sonia and Mark.

We know two.

The first one we've got an idea, but I think I'm going to pronounce it wrong.

-Say who you think they might be.

-A is out of Superman.

-Do you know his name?

-I think it...

-No, we're not saying that.

-B.

-B, we're going to go for B.

-You say it.

-Ming the Merciless.

Ming the Merciless also sounds great in a Liverpudlian accent.

So we have Magneto and we have Ming the Merciless.

Rachel and Mark said Magneto. Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many people said Magneto.

Absolutely right.

11.

Very, very well done. Great answer.

Now Ming the Merciless. What do you think? 11? Lower than?

-Higher, we reckon.

-We think it's higher than that. It's from Flash Gordon.

OK. Ming the Merciless. 11 is what you have to beat. Is it right?

How many people said it?

It's right.

36.

-I've never heard of him.

-Rachel and Mark...

-I didn't recognise him at all.

-..you are the heroes,

Sonia and Mark, the villains of this particular piece.

After one question, Rachel and Mark, you're up 1-0. Richard.

Magneto, the enemy of the X-Men, played by Sir Ian McKellen.

A very good answer. A couple of answers that would have beaten it.

You're quite right, Mark. A is from Superman.

It's General Zod.

General Zod would have scored six points and would have given you the point.

Played by Terence Stamp. There's Ming.

C is Catwoman. Probably best avoided.

Scored 88 points.

The clue is in the ears. And D, do you know that one?

It's Mickey Rourke. But that's not the villain name.

It's Whiplash from Iron Man 2. Very scary.

-Would have scored you two points.

-Wow. Thank you very much, Richard.

OK. Here comes your second question. Sonia and Mark, you have to win this to stay in the game.

Very best of luck. Here it comes. It concerns...

World War II.

World War II. Richard.

I'm simply going to show you five clues to facts about World War II.

-Can you give us the most obscure answer here, please?

-OK.

Let's reveal our five clues to facts about World War II.

And we have got...

The port, the location of the 1940 evacuation

of Allied troops from Northern France.

The Buckinghamshire country estate

that served as HQ of Allied code breakers.

The French city where the full Nazi surrender was signed on the 7th of May in 1945.

The demilitarised zone that Hitler's troops entered in 1936.

And the name of the German air force.

I'll read those all one last time.

The port that was the location of the 1940 evacuation

of Allied troops from Northern France.

The Buckinghamshire country estate

that served as HQ of Allied code breakers.

The French city where the full Nazi surrender was signed on the 7th of May in 1945.

The demilitarised zone that Hitler's troops entered in 1936.

And the name of the German air force.

There we are. Five clues to facts about the Second World War.

Sonia and Mark, you go first.

THEY WHISPER

OK. The second one down, Bletchley House.

You're going to say Bletchley House.

Bletchley House for the Buckinghamshire country estate.

Rachel and Mark. You can talk us through the board.

-Well, we're allowed to go for the same one if we think it's wrong, aren't we?

-Oh, yes.

-I think it's Bletchley Park.

-I love her.

Versailles... Is it the Rhineland? The Luftwaffe.

It's Dunkirk, isn't it?

Bletchley Park. Full Nazi surrender was signed in Versailles.

-Treaty of Versailles.

-You think it's Rhineland and then the Luftwaffe?

I think it's the Rhineland and the Luftwaffe.

I think it's Bletchley Park not Bletchley House.

I think I agree with you, so we're both in agreement.

OK. You're going to submit Bletchley Park.

-We have Bletchley House versus Bletchley Park.

-Yep.

OK. Sonia and Mark have said Bletchley House. Is it right?

How many people said it?

No! Bad luck. Not Bletchley House.

It is, we think, Bletchley Park.

Let's put it to the test. Bletchley Park. All it has to be is right.

And it is right. You are through to the final.

Let's see how far it goes down.

29. Well done.

APPLAUSE

Very, very, very well done indeed, Rachel and Mark.

After only two questions, you are through to the final

-in straight sets. 2-0. Well done. Richard.

-That's a very tough way to go out, Mark and Sonia.

Sorry about that. Just one word wrong.

Yes, Bletchley Park, it currently houses the National Codes Centre

and the National Museum of Computing. Quite the place for dates.

I'd enjoy it.

Let's go through the other answers.

The port is Dunkirk.

Would have scored you 40 points.

The name of the German air force was a big scorer - 55 for Luftwaffe.

The demilitarised zone that Hitler's troops entered...

-Hitler was his villain name, wasn't it?

-Oh, yes.

-Very much so.

I think, Rachel, you said, the Rhineland. Very good answer.

Would have scored three points. The other answer is a pointless answer.

The French city in which the full Nazi surrender was signed. Any clues?

-I thought it was Versailles.

-Was it Versailles?

-It's Reims.

-Versailles was the First World War.

-Of course!

Very well done if you said that at home. A pointless answer.

So the losing pair at the end of the head-to-head, I'm afraid, Sonia and Mark.

-Never mind.

-You've done so well, though. Brilliant.

-Exemplary play all the way through the show.

-We've really enjoyed it.

-We really have.

-What was your favourite round?

-The first one because it was where we got married.

-Lovely.

Nevada, not North Dakota.

Listen, Sonia and Mark, it's been lovely having you on the show.

-Thank you so much for playing. Brilliant.

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

But for Rachel and Mark, it's now time for our pointless final.

Well, congratulations, Rachel and Mark.

You have seen off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

-Wow.

-You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £2,500.

Very, very strong performance.

Very strong performance from you there, Rachel.

I knew you were going to say that! She needs the rock beside her.

-That was a maths question, really, in disguise, Bletchley Park?

-Bletchley Park, kind of, yeah.

The question is, how are you going to pick the category that Rachel's going to answer?

We all know Rachel will pick the category Rachel's going to answer

-and I'll just go along with whatever she says.

-OK.

Well, very best of luck. You've done fantastically well to get thus far.

But the rules are very simple. To win the money for your nominated charities,

all you have to do is find a pointless answer. We haven't had any on the show today.

You only have to find one now and you'll go away with that money for your charities.

First, you've got to choose a category and you have

a choice of five options. Good luck. They are...

-Katie Price.

-Oh, no!

-Formula One...

-Just all of them, not just her.

Interesting. We both know a lot...

You once compared me to Katie Price

-and you've worked with her, haven't you?

-I have.

-But I haven't read her...

-Neither have I.

-..books yet.

Which I'm getting round to, but I haven't quite done it yet.

-Formula One...

-Formula One, I know nothing. Artists... Uh-oh.

Rock Stars...

-I think Transport seems to be the one that's the most obscure.

-Why not?

-And you are quite random so...

-Thank you. Let's go for it.

-We're going Transport.

-You're going Transport?

-Yeah.

Very well done indeed. Let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name...

as many national rail stations on the London tube map

as they could. Richard.

Yes, we're looking for any station on the TFL London tube map

which also provides a national rail service.

Those are the ones on the tube map with the little rail symbol.

It can be on any tube line, London overground or DLR,

so long as it's on the tube map at the beginning of 2012.

Thank you very much. OK. There we are.

You have up to one minute to come up with three answers and all you need

to win that £2,500 is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-No.

-Not yet.

-Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

-I know the Essex ones, like Barking...

-Barking's got national rail?

-Barking, West Ham...

-I would go St Pancras, King's Cross, Paddington. That's obviously no use to us.

-Barking, West Ham...

-West Ham's national rail?

-Liverpool Street. That's an obvious one.

-Yeah, West Ham's one.

-I love that. OK.

Clapham Junction's one, of course. I'm just trying to pretend I know stuff.

Woodford Green, is that one?

-That's your neck of the woods, isn't it?

-Yeah, I only know the Essex ones.

-Croydon. East Croydon. East Croydon is a national rail line.

-Are you sure?

Yes. But I like your Barking. I like your West Ham.

Trouble is, the cross-section of society...

-We're in trouble here, aren't we?

-Yes.

-Um...

I'm just going to say um and ah for a bit longer.

How many more seconds have I got to um and ah? 19 seconds.

Why are you backing away from me? You think, "You useless..."

-No, I'm trying to think. Time. Focus.

-OK. OK, focus.

-Ten seconds.

-Jubilee line.

Go down the Jubilee line, anything on there?

Swiss Cottage, is that a national rail line? No, I don't think it is.

-High Barnet. No. I think what we've got to go for...

-OK.

Your time is up. We're looking for national rail stations on the London tube map.

-I now need your three answers.

-Is Woodford Green one?

Let's do that anyway. So Woodford Green...

-Let's go all those Essex ones.

-Or Harold Hill?

-OK. I need your three answers now.

-Harold Hill?

-Harold Hill.

-Three answers.

-It's obscure. It might not be right. Let's go Harold Hill.

-OK. Harold Hill.

So I think you've got to go for your Holford doo-da,

whatever that was, and then go for the ones...

-You've had your 60 seconds.

-Barking and Woodford Green.

-Woodford Green, Barking and Howard Hill.

-Harold Hill.

-Harold Hill.

-As in King Harold.

-There are the three answers.

-Which of those three do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-If Harold Hill...

-I've never heard of Harold Hill.

-Nor have I.

-If it's a mainline station, national rail,

-we're delighted with Harold Hill.

-Shall we put that last?

-Sure.

-OK.

-That goes last. Which shall we put first?

-Barking. Everyone's heard of Barking.

-OK.

Let's put those up on the board in that order. And here they are.

Barking, Woodford Green, Harold Hill. There we are.

We were looking for national rail stations on the London tube map.

Barking you said was your least confident shot at a pointless answer.

You only have to find one pointless answer, remember,

to win that £2,500 jackpot.

So let's see how many people said Barking.

Is it right?

It is right.

OK. Down it goes. If this goes all the way down to zero,

you leave here with £2,500 for your charities.

It's still going down.

Into the teens.

Into single figures. Down it goes.

Three, two, one. Oh!

GROANING

One point away.

SHE GROANS

One person got Barking. Barking's quite well known.

It's at the end of the line, the end of the tube line.

-It's written on the front of tubes.

-So West Ham might have...

-Upminster!

Upminster's now a good shout.

It's unfortunate. There we are. Not a pointless answer.

-But I think quite... Are we reassured by that?

-No.

-No.

-Aren't we?

-I'm not sure the others are even...right.

The other two are wild guesses I think. Wild-ish from...Raquel.

-You only have two more chances to win today's jackpot.

-Oh, dear.

-Rachel, what's your charity?

It's the Angus Lawson Memorial Trust that helps children's charities

-across the globe and at home.

-Very good indeed.

APPLAUSE

-And, Mark, what's your charity?

-Mine is the Charlie Waller Memorial Trust which is

raising awareness about depression and fighting its symptoms

-and trying to basically help people who are suffering.

-Very good.

APPLAUSE

Well, let's hope, for the sake of those two charities,

that one of your two remaining answers will be pointless. OK.

We're looking for national rail stations on the London tube map.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer which is Woodford Green. It has to be correct and pointless.

If it's both of those things, you leave here with £2,500.

Is it right? How many people said Woodford Green?

No. We weren't sure. Oh, dear.

You only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

-Is it even a tube stop?

-I've never heard of Harold Hill.

-Not as a person, not as a tube map.

-I'm living in the past.

-Harold Hill.

We are looking for national rail stations on the London tube map.

Your third and final answer was Harold Hill.

This was your most confident shot at a pointless answer.

This is your third shot at that jackpot of £2,500. It has to be right.

It has to be pointless. Is it right? Harold Hill.

Oh, no!

-That was obvious. No-one had heard of it!

-You did brilliantly.

Bad luck. Well, there we are. Unfortunately, you didn't manage

to find that all-important pointless answer,

so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £2,500.

However, as it's a celebrity special, we are going to donate

£500 to each celebrity pair for their respective charities.

-Thank you.

-Thank you very much.

That's great. Thank you.

-This is the really hard bit. Richard.

-It's not going to be Upminster and West Ham?

Please don't say that.

You've been so good. You went for Barking. Should have gone for West Ham.

-It was a pointless answer.

-Oh, no!

-Would have won the money.

-I thought that was obvious.

-Upminster also a pointless answer.

-Oh, no!

Let's take a look at some of the other pointless answers.

Well done if you got any of these at home.

Brixton would have won you the money.

The nearest overground rail station to here - Shepherd's Bush.

That would have won you the money. Stratford International.

There's Upminster. Watford Junction as well. A few others.

Amersham would have won you the money. New Cross Gate. Old Street, South Ruislip,

West Hampstead, West Ruislip. All of those pointless.

Well done if you got any of those. Unlucky. You've been brilliant.

-That's a really, really tough way to lose.

-How disappointing.

Unfortunately, we do have to say goodbye to you. It's been brilliant having you on the show.

Thank you both so much for playing. Excellent contestants.

APPLAUSE

All that remains is for me to say thank you to all our celebrity pairs,

Gareth and Andrew, Mark and Julia, Sonia and Mark and, of course,

our excellent finalists, Rachel and Mark.

Join us next time when we'll be putting more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

-It's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd