Radio 2 Pointless Celebrities


Radio 2

A celebrity edition of the quiz with Jo Whiley and Jeremy Vine, Zoe Ball and Michael Ball, Ken Bruce and Anneka Rice, Vanessa Feltz and Craig Charles.


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Transcript


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APPLAUSE

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Thank you very much indeed.

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Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and a very warm welcome

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to this special Radio 2 edition of Pointless Celebrities.

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This is the show where all the questions have been asked

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to 100 people before the show.

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All our celebrities have to do is come up with the answers

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those 100 people couldn't think of.

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Let's meet today's Pointless celebrities.

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APPLAUSE

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-Couple number one.

-I'm Anneka Rice

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and I present the weekend breakfast show on a Saturday on Radio 2.

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And I'm Ken Bruce.

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I ask difficult questions in PopMaster every day

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but I can't answer any questions!

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APPLAUSE

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Couple number two.

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Hi, I'm Craig Charles and I present the House Party

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on Radio 2 on a Saturday night.

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And I'm Vanessa Feltz and I'm the early bird on Radio 2.

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At some point, I hope to catch a worm.

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APPLAUSE

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Couple number three.

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Hi, I'm Jeremy Vine and I present the kind of news show at midday

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and do some graphics for BBC elections.

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I'm Jo Whiley and I'm for the night shift workers.

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I play records on the radio.

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APPLAUSE

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-And, finally, couple number four.

-I'm Michael Ball.

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I present a show on a Sunday.

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I'm here to tell you that "love changes everything"

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and that this is my mother, Zoe.

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Yes, hello, I'm Zoe Ball, mother of two

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and occasional host of PopMaster, when Mr Ken Bruce is away

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and yes, I know I'm not really very good at it.

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And also, I sometimes get involved in dancing.

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APPLAUSE

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Thanks very much, all of you.

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We'll get to chat to each of you through the show as it goes along.

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So, that just leaves one more person for me to introduce -

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a man who's capable of a short wave AND a long wave,

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depending on what kind of mood he's in,

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it's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

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-Hiya. Hey, everybody.

-APPLAUSE

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Good evening. Well, good evening to you.

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Well, good evening.

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I have to say this is about as close to my perfect line-up

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-as you could possibly get.

-Yeah.

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Some of the loveliest people you could imagine on today's show.

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If I'm being super picky,

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I'd like Jedward to be here as well but they're not.

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We've got a lovely pair of Balls on podium four though, so that's nice.

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Now, the most competitive show we've ever had

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was the Radio 1 special,

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-cos they all worked in the same building next to each other.

-Mm.

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-I suspect we might see something similar today.

-I think we may.

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I should point out, though, competitive though it will be,

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that podium two is going to be difficult to beat.

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Vanessa and Craig have both been on the show before

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and have both got through to the jackpot round.

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-Vanessa's won the jackpot as well.

-Fix!

-Ooh!

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They are going to be pretty strong, I think.

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There we are. Thank you very much, Richard.

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All of today's questions have been asked to 100 people before the show.

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Our contestants are hoping to find one of those pointless answers,

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an answer that none of our 100 people gave.

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Find one of those and we will add £250 to the jackpot.

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As today's show is a celebrity special,

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each of our celebrities is playing for a nominated charity,

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we are going to start off with a jackpot of £2,500. There we are.

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APPLAUSE

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Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

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APPLAUSE

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The only rule you have to remember is this.

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The pair with the highest score

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at the end of each round will be eliminated.

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Best of luck to all four pairs.

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Our first category this evening is...

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-Ooh!

-No pressure!

-Popular Music. Can you all decide in your pairs...

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Michael Ball already looking worried.

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..which of you is going to go first, which is going to go second.

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And whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

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OK, and the question concerns...

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-Richard.

-In a moment, Xander's going to show you

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the name of six artists and we are looking for

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any UK number one single by any of those artists, please,

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according to officialcharts.com.

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OK, we're going to put those six artists up on the board

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and they'll stay up there for the whole round.

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You just have to throw out the name of any song

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that has been a number one hit for any of these artists.

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HE SIGHS I'm nervous.

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Let's see who those artists are. We have got...

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-Anneka.

-Oh!

-Anneka, welcome back to Pointless.

-It's lovely to see you.

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I gather you're revisiting Challenge Anneka, you're catching up.

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We're catching up, because the over 60 projects we did,

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well, some are celebrating their 25th anniversary this year,

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-some their 21st, cos it went on for many years.

-Yeah.

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So, I'm going round the whole country, revisiting...

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That must be so rewarding.

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I've been off to Romania, soup kitchens in London.

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The projects are so varied and they're all going strong,

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so it's a lovely thing to do.

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And, of course, on The Archers, recently...

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Because 23 years ago, I did up their village hall,

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-they asked me back over Easter to reopen it again.

-Fantastic!

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Highlight of my life, frankly! The rest is nothing.

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-Now, back to reality here, Anneka.

-OK.

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What about these artists and their number one singles?

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I'm just going to go for Robbie Williams and Millennium.

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Millennium, says Anneka. Let's see if that's right

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and how many of our 100 people said Millennium.

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It's right.

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Ooh.

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-It's not bad.

-Oh!

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There we are. 19. APPLAUSE

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A good start to the round and for the show.

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Yeah, tough on that first podium.

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That was a number one in 1998, confusingly.

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-It's a little bit early, isn't it?

-A little bit previous there.

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-A little bit, isn't it?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-Thank you very much.

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-Vanessa, welcome back.

-Yes, hello.

-Welcome back. Vanessa, your show...

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-You're on at five, I think.

-That's right.

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You're there at five, you look at the papers, you do a round-up,

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and then you walk over to BBC London...

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Yes, I waddle fast to another building, yes.

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But then, presumably,

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the show you do on Radio 2 is your warm-up for BBC London.

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Don't tell anyone at Radio 2 that, for goodness' sake! No, far from it!

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-That's just what it sounds like.

-How rude!

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That's quite handy cos you'll have done all the newspaper work.

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It's a different kind of show.

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The Radio 2 show is a lovely, cosy good morning show

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-and the other one, on BBC Radio London, is hard news.

-Oh, it is!

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Very different sort of show.

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-You have to land on every issue running, don't you?

-That's right.

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You have to have opinions.

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Do you sometimes, just for the fun of it, think,

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-"I'm fairly easygoing on this one..."?

-Never! Never!

-OK.

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-You don't think, "I'd better up the vinegar on this"?

-Certainly not, no.

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Quite right. Now, Vanessa, what would you like to go for?

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Well, I thought I might try Elton John and Daniel.

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Daniel, says Vanessa. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Daniel.

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-Oh, no!

-Oh! Oh!

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-Oh, dear!

-That is an incorrect answer.

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Scores you 100 points.

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Yeah, not a number one single, I'm afraid, Daniel.

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It may not be the last 100 points of the round, I suspect.

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It's wrong for the right reasons,

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though, Vanessa. Jo, welcome.

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-Hi.

-Lovely to have you here.

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-You started at Radio 1 in, sort of, early '90s, mid '90s?

-Yeah.

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-Sort of '92.

-'92, '93, yeah.

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There you are, breaking new acts still, aren't you?

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-Yeah.

-You're doing a sort of John Peel job on Radio 2 now.

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Yeah, I was doing the Evening Session at 1

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and now I'm kind of doing an evening session at Radio 2,

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so, we have loads of concerts, the likes of Ed Sheeran, a-ha...

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-It's a varied palate that I have.

-But still, not a duff flavour on it.

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-All you're hearing is a-ha, you're happy.

-Yeah.

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It could be 24-hour a-ha and he'd be over the moon.

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It seems to have been the best thing I've done at Radio 2, apparently.

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There you go. Now, Jo, what would you like to go for?

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Can I just say commiserations to Craig and Vanessa?

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I'd just like to put that out there.

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Not that we're competitive at all in any way(!)

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-No, we were quietly upset.

-Now watch me sink here.

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I'm going to go with Eminem and I'm going to say Stan.

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-Stan.

-Yeah.

-Stan.

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A little bit of agitation on podium four there.

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I think you might have nicked someone's answer there,

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-but there we are. Stan.

-Really well done, Jo.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Stan.

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-It's right.

-Phew!

-100 was our high score, 19 is our low.

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You passed the high score at the beginning of the round.

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-You pass the low.

-Whoa!

-There we are.

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14, very well done indeed, Jo. APPLAUSE

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Very well played, Jo. From 2000, that was.

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The one that samples Dido in it as well.

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Thank you very much, Richard. Now, Michael, welcome.

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-Yes.

-Now, there you are, Sunday morning.

-Yeah.

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-Prestigious flagship show.

-It's a lovely, lovely, lovely show.

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It's, for me, the best time of the week and the best show of the week.

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-Wonderful.

-No disrespect, guys.

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That is lovely, and to take over from Sir Terry as well.

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Yes, taking over in such sad circumstances

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and not expected at all. A real honour.

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I adored the man, I adored the bones of him

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and so, to be able to sit in his seat is a real privilege.

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Wonderful, and I imagine you get a lot of support from the TOGs

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-as well.

-Yeah, yeah. None from these guys, obviously.

-No, no.

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LAUGHTER

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-Well, very best of luck with that, Michael.

-Thank you.

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-What would you like to go for?

-Right...

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Cos someone stole my answer, I'm going to go for Robbie Williams

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and Something Stupid, which he did with Nicole Kidman.

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OK, let's see if that's right

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and how many of our 100 people went for Something Stupid.

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Oh, it's not going to, is it?

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It's right. It is, it is.

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Well, 19 - sorry - 14 is our low score.

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Oh, and look at that!

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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:10:300:10:33

1, Michael, 1!

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-Very well done indeed.

-No, really,

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I'm very relaxed about that.

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So, by stealing your original answer,

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-actually, Jo did you an enormous favour.

-Fabulous!

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Not competitive at all(!) Yeah, it was Christmas number one, that song.

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The Christmas number one the previous year was

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-Can We Fix It by Bob The Builder. Just so you know.

-There we are.

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We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at those scores.

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1, Michael Ball, the best, the best answer of the round

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by a margin, in fact. Very well done.

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Then we travel up to 14,

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Jo and Jeremy.

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19's where we find Anneka and Ken.

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And then...well, Vanessa and Craig.

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Craig, a low score from you, you never know,

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might keep you in the game.

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Anything could happen.

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Can the second players please step up to the podium?

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OK, Zoe.

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-Oh, yes, hello.

-Welcome. Lovely to have you here.

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-Zoe, you've worked at Radio 1 and Radio 2.

-Yeah.

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What would you say is the difference? Is there a difference?

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Well, I actually grew up listening to more of Radio 2 than Radio 1,

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I have to say. I loved all the shows on Sundays,

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I loved all the kind of...

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I grew up with Terry Wogan at breakfast time, so I kind of,

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I was never very cool, but I always thought I was quite cool,

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so I kind of feel like I've come home, in a way, actually.

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But I guess, Radio 2...

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I love the fact that younger people listen to Radio 2 as well.

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-I do listen to a bit of Radio 1.

-Yeah.

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Occasionally, it's a bit grrr, frenetic for me,

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but I love a bit of grime. Doesn't everybody?

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So, I do have a little switch between the two.

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There we are. Listen, Zoe, you're on 1.

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The high-scorers are Craig and Vanessa on 100.

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So, 98 or less definitely sees you through to the next round.

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I think I'm going to go with Elton John,

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Song For Guy.

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-Song For Guy.

-Yeah.

-Oh!

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There is your red line. If you can get below that red line,

0:12:320:12:35

you're through to the next round.

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Let's see how many people said Song For Guy.

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-Oh, no!

-Oh, gosh!

0:12:410:12:44

-Was it number two?

-Was it number two?

-OK, there we are.

0:12:440:12:46

100 is what that scores.

0:12:460:12:48

-Takes your total up to 101.

-I'm so sorry.

0:12:480:12:52

You might still be in the game.

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-Oh, gosh!

-101 is your total though.

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The big question here is,

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what on Earth has Elton John been playing at?

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LAUGHTER

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Thanks very much indeed. Jeremy, welcome to Pointless.

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-Thank you so much.

-Great to have you here.

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Let's just talk a bit about your brilliant show.

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You took over from Jimmy Young how long ago?

0:13:090:13:12

2003, January 6th.

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I totted it up recently and it's 13 years, actually.

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That is extraordinary.

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And I think it's the best job in the BBC, notwithstanding all of the fun

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that my colleagues have described. I really love it.

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It's an extraordinary programme.

0:13:260:13:28

He got the ball rolling fantastically,

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but you have made it your own

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and, unsurprisingly, it's more popular than the Today programme,

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-for example.

-Well...

-The sort of flagship news programme on Radio 4.

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You didn't say that on the Radio 4 special.

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On the Radio 4 special, there was about 20 minutes of,

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"Oh, Jeremy Vine..."

0:13:450:13:47

LAUGHTER

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Well, the craziness of being able to interview the Prime Minister

0:13:490:13:52

and then say, "Have you ever been pecked in the eye by a gannet?"

0:13:520:13:55

But it is that extraordinary... It's the perfect magazine programme.

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It manages to be very light-hearted at the same time as being...

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-That's very kind.

-It deals with all the major stories. Brilliant.

0:14:010:14:05

-Thank you.

-Absolutely fantastic.

0:14:050:14:07

Now then, Jeremy, talking about major stories,

0:14:070:14:09

what are you going to go for here?

0:14:090:14:11

The high-scorers are behind you, 101. You're on 14.

0:14:110:14:14

86 is your target, 86 or less.

0:14:140:14:18

Yeah, I think I'm going to go for Kylie Minogue,

0:14:180:14:21

-Spinning Around.

-Spinning Around. Here is your red line.

0:14:210:14:25

Get below that with Spinning Around, you're into the next round.

0:14:250:14:28

How many of our 100 people said it?

0:14:280:14:30

-It's right and you're through. Very well done indeed.

-Oh, that's good.

0:14:320:14:35

Oh, that's good. Come on! Go down.

0:14:350:14:38

Perfectly good. 10 for Spinning Around.

0:14:380:14:41

APPLAUSE Takes your total up to 24,

0:14:410:14:44

which I suspect might be the lowest total of the round. We'll see.

0:14:440:14:47

Very well played. Number one in 2000.

0:14:470:14:49

-Kylie Minogue really showing Elton John the way to go, isn't she?

-Yeah.

0:14:490:14:52

-Thank you very much. Craig.

-Hi.

-Welcome. The newest member

0:14:520:14:57

-of the Radio 2 line-up there.

-Yeah.

-Fantastic.

0:14:570:15:00

And the House Party.

0:15:000:15:02

I'm kind of Mr Saturday night now. I do six till nine on 6 Music

0:15:020:15:05

have an hour off, then I do ten till midnight on Radio 2.

0:15:050:15:08

So, you're like Vanessa. You tiptoe across

0:15:080:15:11

-from one studio to the next.

-We do it from the same studio, though,

0:15:110:15:14

-which is good.

-Clever.

-We just change the frequency.

0:15:140:15:16

LAUGHTER

0:15:160:15:18

Tell me about House Party. You only started recently, didn't you?

0:15:180:15:21

It's basically a continuation of the Funk And Soul Show.

0:15:210:15:23

I just play all my favourite records.

0:15:230:15:26

Funk and soul and northern soul is your thing, isn't it?

0:15:260:15:28

That kind of stuff.

0:15:280:15:29

And you can just make up your playlist as you...

0:15:290:15:32

Yeah, no-one tells me what to play, which is really good.

0:15:320:15:34

It's a great feeling cos it is just like being round at your house,

0:15:340:15:37

sticking your favourite records on and talking nonsense,

0:15:370:15:40

-and I thought, "Well, I'm your man."

-Fantastic.

0:15:400:15:43

OK, now, Craig, you really need a pointless answer at this point.

0:15:430:15:48

-I know.

-That's what we're... MICHAEL:

-No, he doesn't.

0:15:480:15:50

LAUGHTER

0:15:500:15:52

I think you... I bet you've got one.

0:15:520:15:54

Shall we stay with Kylie Minogue and go for Can't Get You Out Of My Head?

0:15:540:15:57

-Was that a number one?

-OK, Can't Get You Out Of My Head,

0:15:570:16:00

says Craig. It wants to be pointless,

0:16:000:16:03

which means there is going to be a red line there

0:16:030:16:06

but it won't be visible to you.

0:16:060:16:08

LAUGHTER

0:16:080:16:10

Can't Get You Out Of My Head - how many people said it?

0:16:100:16:13

Oh!

0:16:150:16:16

-Not bad. Sorry about that.

-18.

0:16:220:16:25

-Ah, well.

-Well, 118 is your total.

0:16:250:16:30

-There is a scenario in which you could still survive.

-Yeah.

0:16:300:16:35

-It's all in Mr Bruce's hands.

-Number one from 2001.

0:16:350:16:37

It was released in the same week as a Victoria Beckham single

0:16:370:16:40

and they had that sort of Blur v Oasis, who's going to be number one?

0:16:400:16:43

And it was Kylie and Victoria Beckham got to number six.

0:16:430:16:46

Oh, dear. There you are.

0:16:480:16:49

Ken, a very warm welcome. How long have you been at Radio 2?

0:16:490:16:54

Oh, only a month or two now.

0:16:540:16:56

I don't want to say it out loud in case they realise.

0:16:560:16:59

I've been doing a daily programme on Radio 2 for 31 years.

0:16:590:17:03

-Which is ridiculous!

-Goodness! APPLAUSE

0:17:030:17:05

Everyone's clapping you.

0:17:050:17:07

Well done, well done.

0:17:070:17:09

And how long have you been at your current slot, the 9.30 slot?

0:17:090:17:13

Well, I started that in 1986 and then the BBC moved me

0:17:130:17:16

to late night for a year and early morning for a year

0:17:160:17:18

and then they put me back there.

0:17:180:17:20

-Is there any other slot that you would consider? No!

-Well, no.

0:17:200:17:23

When I did late night,

0:17:230:17:25

I found I didn't quite get used to it cos I was always going to work.

0:17:250:17:28

-I hate that.

-You know that feeling.

0:17:280:17:31

And now, I'm finished work and I can go, "Ha-ha!"

0:17:310:17:34

And enjoy myself all day, sleeping.

0:17:340:17:36

Now, what we require from you, Ken, essentially,

0:17:360:17:39

is a correct answer.

0:17:390:17:41

-It's all we need is a correct answer.

-Well, yes.

0:17:410:17:43

I'm going to play it very safe and say Elton John and Kiki Dee,

0:17:430:17:49

-Don't Go Breaking My Heart.

-Don't Go Breaking My Heart.

0:17:490:17:51

Here is your red line, up there.

0:17:510:17:52

Let's see if it's right and how many of our 100 people got it.

0:17:520:17:55

-It's right.

-Well done.

0:17:570:17:59

It's going down further than I thought.

0:17:590:18:01

-11.

-What a surprise.

0:18:030:18:05

Taking your total up to 30. Nice round score there.

0:18:050:18:09

-APPLAUSE

-Very well played, Ken.

0:18:090:18:12

It was originally supposed to be a duet

0:18:120:18:14

between Elton and Dusty Springfield

0:18:140:18:16

but she was ill at the time of recording,

0:18:160:18:17

so Kiki Dee stepped in.

0:18:170:18:19

There's lots of pointless answers.

0:18:190:18:20

I'll take you through them via the different artists.

0:18:200:18:23

Two Rod Stewart number ones are pointless answers.

0:18:230:18:25

The First Cut Is The Deepest is a pointless answer

0:18:250:18:28

and Baby Jane a pointless answer as well.

0:18:280:18:30

Robbie Williams - two pointless answers.

0:18:300:18:32

The Road To Mandalay and It's Only Us.

0:18:320:18:34

Rihanna - What's My Name?, which she released with Drake,

0:18:340:18:36

was a pointless answer. Also Take A Bow and Run This Town.

0:18:360:18:39

Kylie - no pointless answers at all,

0:18:390:18:41

but 1 point for Hand On Your Heart and Tears On My Pillow.

0:18:410:18:44

That's two different songs.

0:18:440:18:45

Eminem - pointless answers for Just Lose It,

0:18:450:18:47

Smack That, that he did with Akon, and Like Toy Soldiers.

0:18:470:18:51

And pointless answers for Elton John -

0:18:510:18:52

Something About The Way You Look Tonight was a pointless answer

0:18:520:18:55

and Ghetto Gospel that he featured on

0:18:550:18:58

with Tupac was a pointless answer. Let's look at the top three scorers,

0:18:580:19:02

the ones most of our 100 people said.

0:19:020:19:04

Sailing, Rod Stewart - 35.

0:19:050:19:08

Umbrella, Rihanna - 37.

0:19:080:19:10

And Candle In The Wind 1997 - 56 - for Elton John.

0:19:110:19:15

Thank you very much, Richard. So, at the end of our first round,

0:19:150:19:18

the pair we have to say goodbye to,

0:19:180:19:20

with their high score of 118, I can't bear it, Craig and Vanessa.

0:19:200:19:24

Far too soon to be sending you home, but please come and play again.

0:19:240:19:27

-It's been lovely having you here.

-Thank you.

-Craig and Vanessa.

0:19:270:19:31

APPLAUSE

0:19:310:19:33

For the remaining three pairs, it's time for Round Two.

0:19:330:19:35

APPLAUSE

0:19:350:19:38

And look at that! Suddenly, we're down to three pairs.

0:19:390:19:42

That's just how it works but it's cruel, Pointless.

0:19:420:19:45

At the end of this round, we'll have to say goodbye to another pair.

0:19:450:19:48

Well done, all of you. You've seen off our multi-multi-trophy winners.

0:19:480:19:52

-Yes!

-So, very well done. Best of luck to all three pairs.

0:19:520:19:55

Our category for Round Two this evening is...

0:19:550:19:58

Can you all decide in your pairs

0:20:000:20:01

who's going first, who's going second.

0:20:010:20:04

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

0:20:040:20:06

OK, and the question concerns...

0:20:090:20:12

-Richard.

-On each board, we're going to give you six clues,

0:20:150:20:18

the answers to which are fictional professors.

0:20:180:20:20

You need to give us the most obscure answer you can, please.

0:20:200:20:23

Six on the first board, six on the second,

0:20:230:20:25

-12 in all to have go at home. Best of luck.

-Thanks very much indeed.

0:20:250:20:27

Let's reveal our first board of clues to our fictional professors

0:20:270:20:30

and here they come. We've got...

0:20:300:20:33

I'll read those all one last time.

0:20:570:20:59

-Ken Bruce.

-Right, I was worried when I saw these,

0:21:230:21:28

but I will go for the rocket scientist created by Nigel Kneale.

0:21:280:21:34

-Professor Quatermass.

-Professor Quatermass, says Ken.

0:21:340:21:38

Let's see if that's right

0:21:380:21:40

and how many of our 100 people said Professor Quatermass.

0:21:400:21:42

It's right.

0:21:440:21:46

It's right and it's a good answer. Look at that.

0:21:470:21:50

Down it goes to 8. Very well done indeed, Ken.

0:21:500:21:54

Lovely low score there.

0:21:540:21:56

-APPLAUSE

-Very well played, Ken.

0:21:560:21:59

From the Quatermass Xperiment about a manned flight into space.

0:21:590:22:02

It was broadcast live

0:22:020:22:04

-on Saturday evenings.

-There we are. Thank you, Richard.

0:22:040:22:07

Jeremy.

0:22:070:22:09

Um, I'm going to go for the absent-minded genius

0:22:090:22:12

with hearing difficulties created by Herge.

0:22:120:22:15

-I think that's Professor Calculus.

-Professor Calculus, says Jeremy.

0:22:150:22:20

Let's see if that's right

0:22:200:22:21

and how many of our 100 people went for Professor Calculus.

0:22:210:22:24

It's good. 8 is our only score so far.

0:22:280:22:32

Oh, and you score 1!

0:22:330:22:35

-APPLAUSE Look at that!

-Always the one.

0:22:350:22:39

-Professor Calculus scoring 1 point.

-Always the one.

0:22:390:22:42

Very good stuff so far. Well played, everybody.

0:22:420:22:45

-Yeah, Cuthbert Calculus.

-There we are. Thank you very much, Richard.

0:22:450:22:49

-Now, Zoe, look at this.

-I know.

-The bar has been set incredibly low.

0:22:490:22:53

Do you feel like talking us through this board?

0:22:530:22:55

Well, I know the first one is Ross Geller.

0:22:550:22:59

X-Men, I think Professor Xavier.

0:22:590:23:01

Um, Moriarty, the nemesis of Sherlock Holmes.

0:23:010:23:05

And the answer I'm going to give as my choice

0:23:050:23:09

is River Song.

0:23:090:23:11

Curse you, Zoe Ball, curse you. Dr Who is the only thing I know.

0:23:110:23:15

River Song, says Zoe. The daughter of Amy Pond and Rory Williams.

0:23:150:23:19

Let's see if River Song is right and how many of our 100 people got it.

0:23:190:23:22

It's right. 8 is our high score, 1 is our low.

0:23:240:23:27

It's going to be higher.

0:23:270:23:30

-17 for River Song.

-Well done.

-APPLAUSE

0:23:300:23:32

Not bad at all.

0:23:320:23:35

Not bad at all.

0:23:350:23:36

I have to say, this happens very rarely on regular Pointless.

0:23:360:23:40

I don't think it's ever happened on Pointless Celebrities.

0:23:400:23:43

It's the best three answers on the board from our three pairs,

0:23:430:23:46

-so terrific stuff.

-Wow.

-Wow.

0:23:460:23:47

APPLAUSE

0:23:470:23:50

Let's fill in the rest of these.

0:23:500:23:53

In fact, Zoe's just done it for us expertly.

0:23:530:23:55

Ross Geller at the top, the palaeontologist.

0:23:550:23:58

That would have scored you 45.

0:23:580:24:00

Charles Xavier is the next one,

0:24:000:24:02

would have score you 31.

0:24:020:24:04

And, of course, Professor Moriarty, James Moriarty,

0:24:040:24:07

would have scored you 49.

0:24:070:24:09

Thank you very much. We're halfway through the round.

0:24:090:24:12

Let's look at the scores. 1, Jeremy and Jo. Very well done.

0:24:120:24:14

That's the best score of that pass. Then up to 8, Ken and Anneka.

0:24:140:24:17

And then up to 17 -

0:24:170:24:18

they're nice low scores, all of these - Zoe and Michael.

0:24:180:24:22

-Michael...

-Yeah.

-You just happen to be out in front there,

0:24:220:24:24

so we need a low score from you to make sure you remain with us.

0:24:240:24:28

-I'll do my best.

-You'll have a lovely new board,

0:24:280:24:30

but make sure you find

0:24:300:24:31

a testing answer there.

0:24:310:24:34

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

0:24:340:24:37

We're going to put six more clues to fictional professors

0:24:390:24:42

up on the board and here they come.

0:24:420:24:44

I shall read those one last time.

0:25:110:25:12

-Michael.

-Yes.

-Michael.

-I really wish I'd had the other board.

0:25:360:25:41

So, I'm going to be really obvious, which is a terrible thing,

0:25:410:25:45

and go for the professor of phonetics,

0:25:450:25:47

-which is Professor Henry Higgins.

-Henry Higgins, says Michael,

0:25:470:25:51

for My Fair Lady. Let's see if that's right.

0:25:510:25:53

No red line for you, cos you're the high-scorers,

0:25:530:25:55

but let's see how many of our 100 people got Henry Higgins.

0:25:550:25:59

It's right.

0:26:010:26:02

That's not a bad score. Down it goes.

0:26:050:26:07

17.

0:26:070:26:08

Exactly the same as you got on the first pass, taking your total to 34.

0:26:080:26:12

-Not bad.

-It's not a bad score at all. It's one of those things.

0:26:120:26:16

Because you're in musical theatre,

0:26:160:26:18

you assume everyone knows that but, actually,

0:26:180:26:21

-17 is a pretty low score.

-Great.

-Not bad at all.

0:26:210:26:24

-Jo, ideally you'd score 32 or less.

-OK.

0:26:240:26:28

I was, obviously, going to say Henry Higgins. Thank you, Michael Ball!

0:26:280:26:31

Pretty much the only other one I know is Dumbledore

0:26:310:26:35

and that's going to have a massive score.

0:26:350:26:37

You're going to say...

0:26:370:26:39

Oh, and then I've said it and, therefore, you have to take it.

0:26:390:26:42

-I do.

-So, I've stitched myself up.

-Oh, Jo, I'm sorry.

0:26:420:26:46

-It's got to be.

-Dumbledore.

0:26:460:26:49

-Now, here is your red line.

-I'm sorry, Jeremy.

0:26:490:26:51

Get below that with Dumbledore, you're through to the next round.

0:26:510:26:54

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Professor Dumbledore.

0:26:540:26:57

It's right.

0:26:590:27:01

Ooh, look at that!

0:27:020:27:04

Oh, 35!

0:27:040:27:06

APPLAUSE 35. Takes your total up to 36.

0:27:060:27:10

-Oh.

-Yes, a tougher board, this one, I have to say,

0:27:100:27:14

-so all still to play for, I suspect, in this round.

-Absolutely.

0:27:140:27:18

-Thank you very much indeed. Now, Anneka.

-Oh!

0:27:180:27:21

This board is all yours,

0:27:210:27:23

-if you fancy talking us through it.

-I can't!

0:27:230:27:25

I literally can't.

0:27:250:27:27

Thank goodness I've got one left,

0:27:270:27:30

but I'm going to go for the archaeologist and adventurer

0:27:300:27:35

-as Indiana Jones.

-Indiana Jones,

0:27:350:27:37

says Anneka. Here is your red line.

0:27:370:27:39

If you can get below that with Indiana Jones,

0:27:390:27:42

you're through to the next round.

0:27:420:27:43

How many people said Indiana Jones though?

0:27:430:27:46

It's right.

0:27:480:27:50

Oh, 62, I'm afraid,

0:27:510:27:52

for Indiana Jones, which takes your total up to 70.

0:27:520:27:57

APPLAUSE

0:27:570:27:59

Now, on this pass, we've had the three biggest answers

0:27:590:28:03

on the board, so it just goes to show.

0:28:030:28:04

There's three tough answers still up there.

0:28:040:28:07

The expert in religious iconology - Robert Langdon.

0:28:070:28:10

12 points if you said that.

0:28:100:28:13

The architect played by Josh Radnor. This is a brilliant comedy.

0:28:130:28:16

He's called Ted Mosby and would have scored you 9 points.

0:28:160:28:19

And the Planet Express owner is Professor Hubert Farnsworth

0:28:190:28:23

and he would have scored you 8 points

0:28:230:28:25

-and he's the best answer on the board.

-Thank you very much indeed.

0:28:250:28:28

We are at the end of our second round

0:28:280:28:30

and I'm sorry to say the pair we have to send home,

0:28:300:28:32

with their high score of 70, Anneka and Ken.

0:28:320:28:34

It's been lovely having you.

0:28:340:28:36

Sorry to say goodbye so soon. Come back and play again soon.

0:28:360:28:38

-Thank you.

-We will, thank you.

-Anneka and Ken. Wonderful.

0:28:380:28:41

APPLAUSE

0:28:410:28:43

But for Zoe and Michael, Jo and Jeremy,

0:28:430:28:45

it's now time for our head-to-head.

0:28:450:28:47

APPLAUSE

0:28:470:28:49

Congratulations, Jo and Jeremy, Zoe and Michael.

0:28:510:28:53

You're now one step closer to the final and the chance to play

0:28:530:28:56

for our jackpot, which currently stands at £2,500.

0:28:560:29:01

APPLAUSE

0:29:010:29:03

This is the point where we decide who goes through to the final

0:29:030:29:06

to play for that jackpot and we do it by making you go head-to-head.

0:29:060:29:09

The difference is you can now start playing as a team.

0:29:090:29:11

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

0:29:110:29:14

Best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

0:29:140:29:16

APPLAUSE

0:29:160:29:19

Here comes your first question and it concerns...

0:29:220:29:26

-Brilliant! Yes!

-LAUGHTER

0:29:290:29:32

-Richard.

-We're going to show you five pictures

0:29:320:29:34

of famous statues and sculptures from around the world.

0:29:340:29:37

Can you tell us the country in which you would find these, please?

0:29:370:29:40

Thank you very much.

0:29:400:29:41

Let's reveal our five famous statues and sculptures and here they come.

0:29:410:29:45

There we are. Five famous statues or sculptures.

0:30:100:30:13

We just need the countries in which you would find them.

0:30:130:30:16

Jo and Jeremy, you're our low-scorers, so you'll go first.

0:30:160:30:20

-Jo, you say this cos...

-We're going to go for D, Denmark, because...

0:30:200:30:26

-Denmark?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-D. D, Denmark.

0:30:260:30:29

Now, Zoe and Michael, do you want to talk us through that board?

0:30:290:30:32

Well, we think the Sphinx might be in Egypt.

0:30:320:30:36

-That's where we run into a little bit of trouble.

-Mm-hmm.

0:30:360:30:39

E's got to be China. Shall we take a guess and go C is France?

0:30:390:30:44

-ZOE GASPS

-Or B is France.

0:30:440:30:46

-You choose.

-Oh, don't make me choose.

0:30:460:30:48

All right, let's not look foolish on television.

0:30:480:30:50

-We'd like to go for E and China, please.

-OK, E, China.

0:30:500:30:54

So, Jo and Jeremy are saying D, Denmark.

0:30:540:30:57

Let's see if that's right and how many of people said Denmark for D.

0:30:570:31:00

-Well done, Jo. Brilliant.

-APPLAUSE

0:31:070:31:10

-There we are. It's right and it scores you 40.

-Superb.

0:31:100:31:13

Zoe and Michael are saying China for E.

0:31:130:31:16

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

0:31:160:31:19

-It would be funny if it was wrong.

-It's right.

0:31:200:31:23

And it scores 63. APPLAUSE

0:31:230:31:27

Which means, Jo and Jeremy, very well done.

0:31:270:31:30

After one question, you're up 1-0.

0:31:300:31:32

Well played. Your instincts were right.

0:31:320:31:33

The two that you knew were going to be high-scorers,

0:31:330:31:36

cos A is Egypt and that's a very big scorer as well.

0:31:360:31:39

Would have scored you 80.

0:31:390:31:40

B and C are the answers that would have won you the point

0:31:400:31:42

and you were tempted to go for France for one or other of them.

0:31:420:31:46

-Yeah.

-Which do you think is France?

-I think I probably would have gone,

0:31:460:31:49

actually been perverse, and done France was B.

0:31:490:31:52

-Well, I can tell you B is Slovakia.

-Oh.

-Oh, thank goodness.

0:31:520:31:56

-And it was a pointless answer.

-Right, wow.

0:31:560:31:58

It's a statue of a sewer worker. But C...

0:31:580:32:01

-Is France.

-Is Russia.

-Oh!

0:32:010:32:03

LAUGHTER

0:32:030:32:06

-It's The Motherland Calls.

-Oh, thank goodness.

-1 point for that.

0:32:060:32:09

-Who is it?

-It's nearly 300 feet high, that is.

0:32:090:32:11

-That's Mother Russia, essentially.

-Oh.

-Oh.

0:32:110:32:13

-It's to commemorate the Battle of Stalingrad.

-There we are.

0:32:130:32:15

Thank you, Richard. Here comes your second question.

0:32:150:32:18

Zoe and Michael, you get to answer it first,

0:32:180:32:20

-but you have to win this one to stay in the game.

-Course we do.

0:32:200:32:22

Our second question this evening is all about...

0:32:220:32:26

Five clues now to facts about Roger Federer.

0:32:280:32:30

-Can you give us the most obscure answer?

-Oh, my goodness.

0:32:300:32:33

Here come our five clues, and we've got...

0:32:330:32:36

Here they come again.

0:32:530:32:55

Zoe and Michael will go first.

0:33:100:33:12

OK, let's go for the US player.

0:33:130:33:16

-I think they'll know that less than his nationality.

-Well, let's see.

0:33:160:33:22

-Pete Sampras.

-Pete Sampras, say Zoe and Michael. Pete Sampras.

0:33:220:33:26

Now then, Jo and Jeremy, that board's all yours.

0:33:260:33:29

-Talk us through it.

-Oh, dear! Well, we thought about his nationality.

0:33:290:33:32

We veered between Swedish and Swiss and we went Swiss,

0:33:320:33:35

so I think we've got to go number one or number two.

0:33:350:33:38

I would say... What would you say for...?

0:33:380:33:40

You said Nadal. Or Djokovic.

0:33:400:33:43

-So, let's say Nadal.

-OK, the player who defeated him we think was...

0:33:430:33:48

-TOGETHER:

-Nadal.

0:33:480:33:50

OK, so, we have Pete Sampras and we have Rafa Nadal.

0:33:500:33:52

Zoe and Michael have gone for Pete Sampras.

0:33:520:33:55

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people said it.

0:33:550:33:58

-It's right. It is Pete Sampras.

-Thank goodness.

0:34:000:34:03

-Oh, thank goodness.

-That's a good answer.

0:34:030:34:06

-Down it goes to 24.

-Oh, no!

0:34:060:34:08

APPLAUSE

0:34:080:34:10

-We suddenly...

-Hang on, what's happened?

-We've suddenly realised.

0:34:100:34:13

We've suddenly realised the answer we should have given.

0:34:130:34:16

-Moment of terrible clarity here.

-No, go on, give us the answer.

0:34:160:34:19

-Have you just had a moment?

-We've suddenly realised!

0:34:190:34:21

-Have you remembered who won gold at 2012?

-Yeah.

-But memorably.

0:34:210:34:25

-Oh, my goodness!

-Let's just find out what happens

0:34:250:34:27

if we say Rafa Nadal to our column. LAUGHTER

0:34:270:34:31

-What a shame.

-Oh, mm.

0:34:310:34:33

Oh, it's not Rafa Nadal.

0:34:360:34:38

Which means well done, Zoe and Michael.

0:34:380:34:40

That's exactly what we needed to happen. You're back in the game.

0:34:400:34:42

-After two questions, it's 1-1.

-I would like to be a fly on the wall

0:34:420:34:46

when the Eggheads get their hands on YOU, Jeremy.

0:34:460:34:48

LAUGHTER

0:34:480:34:50

I feel so bad and, Andy Murray, I'm a big fan. How did that happen?

0:34:500:34:54

Cos I remember there was a moment of him saying, "This is a great moment.

0:34:540:34:57

"I'm connecting with the British people," and all that.

0:34:570:35:00

Of course it was Andy Murray, of course it was!

0:35:000:35:03

It was Andy Murray. Actually only scored 29 points.

0:35:030:35:05

His nationality is Swiss. Big scorer, though.

0:35:050:35:07

Would have scored you 50.

0:35:070:35:10

Good work from our 100 on the name of the woman he married.

0:35:100:35:12

It's Mirka and would have scored 7 points.

0:35:120:35:16

And the best answer is the year he won his sole French Open title.

0:35:160:35:19

It took him much longer to win the French than any other grand slam.

0:35:190:35:22

2009 was the answer there. Would have scored 2 points.

0:35:220:35:26

Very well done if you said that at home.

0:35:260:35:28

Thank you very much indeed. Now we have a competition on our hands.

0:35:280:35:32

Very, very best of luck to both pairs.

0:35:320:35:34

Whoever wins this question goes through to the final

0:35:340:35:36

-and plays for that jackpot for their charities.

-I want the trophy.

0:35:360:35:39

Here it comes. It's all about...

0:35:390:35:41

-Richard.

-We're going to show you the names of five composers of musicals

0:35:440:35:48

but we're going to show the first and last letters of their names

0:35:480:35:51

and something that they've composed.

0:35:510:35:53

Can you tell us the most obscure of these five, please?

0:35:530:35:55

Whoever does that is going through to play for our jackpot.

0:35:550:35:58

OK, best of luck to both pairs.

0:35:580:36:00

Let's reveal our five musical composers and here they come.

0:36:000:36:03

I'm going to read all those again.

0:36:200:36:22

Jo and Jeremy, you go first.

0:36:310:36:34

We think the newest one is the most obscure,

0:36:340:36:37

-so we are thinking Tim Minchin.

-OK, Tim Minchin, say Jo and Jeremy.

0:36:370:36:43

Now, Zoe and Michael, do you feel like talking us through this board?

0:36:430:36:48

OK, we've got Irving Berlin, Cole Porter...

0:36:480:36:51

-Your mate.

-Andrew Lloyd Webber

0:36:510:36:53

and Lionel Bart.

0:36:530:36:55

-Shall we go Lionel Bart?

-Lionel Bart.

-I'd say Lionel Bart.

0:36:550:36:57

Zoe and Michael are going to go for Lionel Bart.

0:36:570:37:01

We have Tim Minchin, we have Lionel Bart.

0:37:010:37:03

Jo and Jeremy said Tim Minchin for Matilda The Musical.

0:37:030:37:06

Let's see how many of our 100 people got that.

0:37:060:37:08

It's right.

0:37:100:37:12

-22.

-Is that us?

-APPLAUSE

0:37:160:37:20

22 for Tim Minchin.

0:37:200:37:23

Zoe and Michael have said Lionel Bart for Oliver!

0:37:230:37:26

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

0:37:260:37:28

It's right.

0:37:300:37:31

-Ooh, 50, Lionel Bart.

-Oh, I'm so sorry.

0:37:340:37:36

-I'm sorry.

-APPLAUSE

0:37:360:37:39

-Which means very well done, Jo and Jeremy.

-Well done.

0:37:390:37:43

After three questions, you are through to the final, 2-1.

0:37:430:37:46

I think you spiked each other's guns on every single question there.

0:37:460:37:49

Tim Minchin's the best answer on the board.

0:37:490:37:51

The only thing to clear up is the best answer you could have gone for.

0:37:510:37:54

Cole porter would have been a better answer.

0:37:540:37:56

Cole Porter would have scored you 40 points.

0:37:560:37:59

And Irving Berlin an even better answer.

0:37:590:38:02

Irving Berlin would have scored you 30 points.

0:38:020:38:04

Andrew Lloyd Webber.

0:38:040:38:05

Give him a ring now and tell him he scored 88 points.

0:38:050:38:09

-That was a good head-to-head, wasn't it?

-Good head-to-head, yeah.

0:38:090:38:13

Well, what about that?

0:38:130:38:14

I'm afraid, at the end of it, Zoe and Michael,

0:38:140:38:17

we have to say goodbye to you. You've done so well.

0:38:170:38:20

Come and play again.

0:38:200:38:22

It would be lovely to see you through to the final next time.

0:38:220:38:24

-Thank you very much indeed. Zoe and Michael.

-Thank you.

-Good luck.

0:38:240:38:28

-Well played.

-APPLAUSE

0:38:280:38:31

For Jo and Jeremy, it's now time for our Pointless final.

0:38:310:38:33

APPLAUSE

0:38:330:38:36

Well done, Jo and Jeremy. You've seen off all the competition

0:38:370:38:40

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

0:38:400:38:43

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

0:38:490:38:52

for your charities, and at the end of today's show,

0:38:520:38:54

the jackpot is standing at £2,500.

0:38:540:38:56

APPLAUSE

0:38:560:38:59

Very, very well done.

0:38:590:39:01

All you have to do now is win this round and take that jackpot home

0:39:010:39:04

for your charities, which would just be the perfect close.

0:39:040:39:07

I'm sure you can do it.

0:39:070:39:08

As always, you get to choose your category in this last round.

0:39:080:39:11

Four things on the board. Let's see what today's selection looks like.

0:39:110:39:15

We have got...

0:39:150:39:16

-Romantic poetry?

-What would you do?

-I'd do whatever you want to do.

0:39:230:39:28

Shall we do romantic poetry cos I think we could find ourselves

0:39:280:39:31

-in good shape there, I think?

-All right.

-Romantic poetry it is.

0:39:310:39:35

Very best of luck.

0:39:350:39:37

We're looking for any of the following three things, please.

0:39:370:39:39

We're looking for any words of six or more letters

0:39:390:39:42

in Jerusalem by William Blake.

0:39:420:39:44

That's the version that starts "And did those feet..."

0:39:440:39:46

Any words of six letters or more in Ozymandias.

0:39:460:39:48

Or any words of six letters or more in Daffodils by Wordsworth.

0:39:480:39:52

They're all taken from The New Penguin Book of Romantic Poetry.

0:39:520:39:55

Obviously, we won't accept the words "Jerusalem",

0:39:550:39:57

"Ozymandias" or "Daffodils".

0:39:570:39:59

Oh, that is quite an important addition of information.

0:39:590:40:02

Thank you very much. As always, you've got up to one minute

0:40:020:40:04

to come up with three answers.

0:40:040:40:06

All you need to win that jackpot for your charities

0:40:060:40:08

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

0:40:080:40:10

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

-Good.

0:40:100:40:12

Let's put 60 seconds up on the clock. Your time starts now.

0:40:120:40:15

-OK, what are you thinking, just quickly?

-I'm thinking nothing.

0:40:150:40:19

-This is all on you.

-Let's just focus on Jerusalem.

0:40:190:40:21

"And did those feet in ancient times Walk upon England's mountains green

0:40:210:40:24

"And did the holy Lamb of God

0:40:240:40:26

"In England's pleasant pastures seen..."

0:40:260:40:29

-Er... So, we've got...

-"Pleasant".

-"Pleasant". "Mountains".

0:40:290:40:34

Just bear with. We're not there yet.

0:40:340:40:36

Daffodils is "I wandered lonely as a cloud".

0:40:360:40:39

-So, I think you could have "wandered" on that.

-OK.

-I think.

0:40:390:40:41

Um... And did... Let's just think about this.

0:40:410:40:45

Um, "Bring me my bow of burning gold Bring me my arrows of desire."

0:40:450:40:51

So, "arrows", definitely. "Bring me my spear of burnished..." Something.

0:40:510:40:57

I think "burnished" is in there.

0:40:570:40:59

So, I would say "arrows",

0:40:590:41:00

"burnished" and "wandered" at the moment.

0:41:000:41:02

-We've got 14 seconds left.

-OK.

-Anything else?

-No.

-Ten seconds left.

0:41:020:41:06

# Bring me my bow of burning gold

0:41:060:41:08

# Bring me my arrows of desire

0:41:080:41:10

# Bring me my... O clouds unfold... #

0:41:100:41:13

-Cos the poem became the hymn, so...

-There we are.

0:41:130:41:17

That is your minute up. Let's have your three words.

0:41:170:41:19

Are they all three going to be from Jerusalem?

0:41:190:41:21

No, I'm going to go for "wandered", which is from Wordsworth,

0:41:210:41:24

-"arrows" and "burnished".

-So, "wandered", "arrows", "burnished".

0:41:240:41:31

-Yes.

-There we are.

0:41:310:41:32

Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

0:41:320:41:35

-"Burnished".

-"Burnished" goes last. Least likely to be pointless?

0:41:350:41:38

-"Wandered"?

-"Wandered".

-Yeah, for sure.

0:41:380:41:40

OK, well, let's put those answers up on the board in that order

0:41:400:41:43

and here they are. We've got...

0:41:430:41:45

Three answers. Let us hope one of those is pointless

0:41:490:41:52

and will win that jackpot for your charities.

0:41:520:41:54

Can I ask what your charities are? Jo, who are you playing for?

0:41:540:41:56

-Mine is Shooting Star Chase, which is a hospice.

-Excellent. Jeremy?

0:41:560:42:01

Motor Neurone Disease Association,

0:42:010:42:03

-helping people with that disease.

-Wonderful.

0:42:030:42:06

APPLAUSE

0:42:060:42:10

Two excellent charities there.

0:42:100:42:11

Let's hope one of these answers - at least one of these answers -

0:42:110:42:14

is pointless and you can take that jackpot home and split it

0:42:140:42:17

between those charities. Your first answer was "wandered".

0:42:170:42:20

In this case, we were looking for words of six letters or more

0:42:200:42:22

from Daffodils by Wordsworth.

0:42:220:42:24

It has to be right, obviously,

0:42:240:42:26

then it has to be pointless for you to win, so for £2,500,

0:42:260:42:29

let's see how many people said "wandered".

0:42:290:42:31

It's right.

0:42:340:42:36

All it has to be is pointless and you will win that jackpot.

0:42:360:42:40

Down it goes. "Wandered" takes us down through the 30s

0:42:400:42:43

to 34.

0:42:430:42:44

APPLAUSE

0:42:440:42:46

OK, so not a pointless answer at this stage.

0:42:460:42:49

We move on to your next answer, which is "arrows".

0:42:490:42:52

Now we've moved onto Jerusalem by Blake.

0:42:520:42:55

It has to be pointless for you to win the jackpot.

0:42:550:42:58

Let's find out, for £2,500, how many of our 100 people said "arrows".

0:42:580:43:02

It's right. "Wandered" took us all the way down to 34.

0:43:050:43:08

"Arrows" now takes us down through the 40s, passes 34.

0:43:080:43:11

Into the 20s, into the teens. Are we going to make single figures?

0:43:110:43:14

Yes, we are. Down it goes.

0:43:140:43:16

-Still going down to 3!

-Oh!

0:43:160:43:17

-APPLAUSE Wow!

-Oh, my God!

0:43:170:43:20

APPLAUSE DROWNS SPEECH

0:43:200:43:23

Well, we've hit a rich vein here. Very good indeed.

0:43:230:43:26

OK, your third and final answer is "burnished".

0:43:260:43:30

Again, we're looking for words of six letters or more

0:43:300:43:33

from Jerusalem by Blake. "Burnished" has to be correct,

0:43:330:43:36

then it has to be pointless for you to win so, for £2,500,

0:43:360:43:39

let's see how many of our 100 people said "burnished".

0:43:390:43:41

-Oh!

-AUDIENCE GROAN

0:43:450:43:47

-Not in there.

-I'm afraid it's not in there.

0:43:470:43:50

APPLAUSE I'm afraid it's not in there.

0:43:500:43:53

"Arrows" - lovely low score there,

0:43:530:43:57

but I'm afraid you just didn't find

0:43:570:43:59

that pointless answer that you needed,

0:43:590:44:01

so you didn't win today's jackpot of £2,500.

0:44:010:44:04

However, as today's show is a celebrity special

0:44:040:44:07

and each celebrity is playing for a charity,

0:44:070:44:09

we're going to donate £500 to each pair

0:44:090:44:12

-to split between their respective charities.

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

0:44:120:44:15

It's been fabulous having you on. Very well done indeed.

0:44:150:44:18

Tremendous performance. Thank you so much.

0:44:180:44:20

And you get a Pointless trophy as well to take home.

0:44:200:44:22

Jo and Jeremy. Brilliant.

0:44:220:44:24

APPLAUSE

0:44:240:44:26

Yeah, not "burnished". "Burning" is in there.

0:44:280:44:31

"Burning would have scored you 3 points though.

0:44:310:44:33

But right at the end of our 60 seconds,

0:44:330:44:35

you said the line, "O clouds unfold".

0:44:350:44:38

"Clouds" and "unfold" both pointless answers.

0:44:380:44:42

You didn't even hear yourself say it, I don't think.

0:44:420:44:45

You stuck with the answers you came with.

0:44:450:44:47

Let's take a look at all the pointless answers.

0:44:470:44:50

We'll start with Jerusalem.

0:44:500:44:52

"Countenance divine". "Countenance" would have scored you 1 point.

0:44:530:44:57

And "clouded" also a pointless answer.

0:44:580:45:02

Well done if you said any of those. Ozymandias now by Percy Shelley.

0:45:020:45:06

Lots of pointless answers here.

0:45:060:45:09

Everything, apart from "despair", "traveller", "nothing",

0:45:120:45:16

"remains", "pedestal", "mighty" and "antique".

0:45:160:45:18

Everything else was a pointless answer.

0:45:180:45:20

Well done if you said anything else.

0:45:200:45:22

And words of six letters or more in Daffodils.

0:45:220:45:24

Everything in that, apart from "wandered", "lonely",

0:45:290:45:32

"golden", "floats". Everything else was a pointless answer in that.

0:45:320:45:35

Well done if you got any of those at home. It's been brilliant fun.

0:45:350:45:38

Thank you so much for entertaining us so mightily.

0:45:380:45:40

I'm sorry we couldn't send you away with the whole jackpot.

0:45:400:45:43

Thanks very much indeed. Thank you, Jo and Jeremy.

0:45:430:45:46

We've loved having you on and please come and play again.

0:45:460:45:49

In the meantime, thank you so much. Jo and Jeremy.

0:45:490:45:52

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:45:520:45:55

Join us next time,

0:45:550:45:57

when we'll be putting more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

0:45:570:46:00

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

0:46:000:46:02

And it's goodbye from me. But, before we go,

0:46:020:46:04

we have a special performance by the host of The Art Of Song on Radio 2.

0:46:040:46:08

Here's Mika, singing Piano Man.

0:46:080:46:10

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:46:100:46:13

# It's nine o'clock on a Saturday

0:46:160:46:20

# The regular crowd shuffles in

0:46:200:46:23

# There's an old man sitting right next to me

0:46:230:46:28

# Making love to his tonic and gin

0:46:280:46:32

# He says, "Son, will you play me a memory

0:46:320:46:36

# "I'm not really sure how it goes

0:46:360:46:40

# "But it's sad and it's sweet and I knew it complete

0:46:400:46:44

# "When I wore a younger man's clothes"

0:46:440:46:48

# Da-da-da-di-di-doh

0:46:490:46:53

# Da-da-da-di-di-do-o-oh

0:46:530:47:00

# Oh, sing us a song You're the piano man

0:47:000:47:05

# Sing us a song tonight

0:47:050:47:08

# Cos we're all in the mood for a melody

0:47:080:47:12

# And you've got us feeling all right

0:47:120:47:16

# Now John at the bar is a friend of mine

0:47:160:47:20

# He gives me my drinks for free

0:47:200:47:24

# And he's quick with a joke and to light up your smoke

0:47:240:47:28

# But there's someplace that he'd rather be

0:47:280:47:32

# He says, "Bill, I believe this is killing me"

0:47:320:47:36

# As the smile runs away from his face

0:47:360:47:40

# "And I know that I could be a movie star

0:47:400:47:44

# "If I could get out of this place"

0:47:440:47:49

# La-da-da-di-di-do-doh

0:47:490:47:53

# # La-da-da-di-di-do-o-o-oh

0:47:530:48:01

# Sing us a song You're the piano man

0:48:010:48:06

# Sing us a song tonight

0:48:060:48:10

# Cos we're all in the mood for a melody

0:48:100:48:15

# And you've got us feeling all right. #

0:48:150:48:21

APPLAUSE

0:48:320:48:36

A special celebrity Radio 2 edition of the general knowledge quiz in which four teams try to come up with the answers that no-one else could think of. Presented by Alexander Armstrong and co-host Richard Osman. Featuring Jo Whiley and Jeremy Vine, Zoe Ball and Michael Ball, Ken Bruce and Anneka Rice, Vanessa Feltz and Craig Charles. Plus, a performance from Mika.