Episode 52 Pointless

Thank you very much. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong,

and a warm welcome to Pointless, the quiz show where

the obvious answers mean nothing, and obscure answers mean everything.

-Let's meet today's players.

-APPLAUSE

And couple number one.

Hi, there, I'm Victoria, this is Rose.

We're friends from County Durham.

Couple number two?

Hello, I'm Simon, this is my nephew James.

From Newcastle, now living in Hertfordshire.

Couple number three.

Hi, I'm Del. This is my wife, Sarah, from Ashford in Kent.

And, finally, couple number four.

I'm Jake. I live in Cheltenham.

This is my friend, Rob, Rob lives in Manchester.

-And these are today's contestants.

-APPLAUSE

Thanks, all of you. We'll find out more about you throughout the show.

That leaves just one more person for me to introduce.

The freakish sideshow attraction of our travelling fair,

step right up and wonder at the man who knows everything.

-It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

-Hiya.

Hi, everybody. Hiya. WHOOPING AND CHEERING

-Freakish sideshow attraction, is it?

-That's it, yeah...

After all these years we've worked together?

-The man who knows everything, that's the only freakishness.

-OK.

He knows everything. Yeah.

He, in fact, you, are freakishly intelligent.

HE CHUCKLES Is that right?

You notice how I rushed to get to that nice bit at the end.

They say on Twitter, when you go through the boards,

Xander gets the questions right, but he knows them already.

He's not really clever. I always say, no, you actually are that clever.

Yeah. You are nice.

-But you only see boards where I know you're going to know.

-That's true.

-Didn't we see a brilliant performance last time?

-We did.

Deb was unbelievable. Started the show with a pointless answer,

got her team out of trouble in round one,

finished the show with a pointless answer as well. Awesome throughout.

Took home a very nice jackpot, and thoroughly deserved it.

She was terrific. Very good pair. Lucy was her goddaughter.

They did terrifically well.

We've got Sarah and Del back from that show.

Joined the 200 club in the second round.

Slightly unlucky, I think, to join the 200 club.

-Not terrible answers. One of those rounds that went against you.

-Yeah.

So we might see a bit more of them today.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

All our questions on Pointless were put to 100 people before the show.

Our contestants need to find the obscure answers

those 100 people didn't get.

We're trying to find a pointless answer none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we will add 250 quid to the jackpot.

Deb and Lucy won the jackpot last time.

So today's jackpot starts back at £1,000. There it is.

If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

APPLAUSE

OK, in this first round, I want an answer from each of you.

No conferring among the pairs before you give that answer.

At the end of round, whichever pair has the highest score

will be heading home. Do what you can to make sure that's not you.

Our first category today is:

Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

The question concerns:

Richard?

In 2013, Radio Two did a poll

to find the greatest number two singles of all time.

Songs that never got to the top of the charts.

We're going to give you seven on each pass.

We'll tell you the year they were number two.

You need to give the act who had the number two.

There's 14 in all. If you want to have a go at home, very best of luck.

We want to know who had number two hits with these singles.

We have a board of seven. Let's have a look at them.

I'll read those all one last time.

Rose and Victoria, you all drew lots before the show today.

You are going to go first.

-Rose, a warm welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you.

-What do you do, Rose?

-I'm a postgraduate student.

I'm training to be a social worker at the moment.

Student life, still fun?

-No, it's not so good the second time round.

-Really?

-Are they a bit annoying, the undergraduates?

-A bit.

What do you do in your spare time, Rose?

I enjoy playing music.

-I enjoy baking, though I'm not very good at it.

-Playing music?

-Playing music.

-What do you play?

-I play piano, clarinet, and saxophone.

-Excellent.

-You've played them for quite a long time?

-Yes.

-And are very good at them.

-Hm. That's debatable.

You'd have to hear me. I don't think that would be great.

-Alto or tenor sax?

-Alto.

-Very good.

Now, then, what about this board?

Um, not looking too bad.

I think I'm going to go for the top one, Golden Brown, Stranglers.

The Stranglers, says Rose, let's hear if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said the Stranglers.

She is right.

-There we are, 26.

-APPLAUSE

Kept off the number one spot by A Town Called Malice, by The Jam.

Loads of top 40 singles, The Stranglers,

but only one top five, and it was that.

There we are. Simon? Simon, welcome to the show.

-Thank you.

-What do you do, Simon?

I'm a telecom engineer.

What do you do in your spare time?

-I like to do a bit of tae kwon do, a bit of skiing.

-Not at the same time?

-Not at the same time.

-It would be awesome if you could. Ho!

-Ski-kwon do.

-Ski-kwon do?

-I'd like that.

-That would be fun.

-Simon, whose idea was it to come on the show?

-It was my idea.

James, the obvious candidate?

No, I put the subject to the whole family

and James was the quickest one to pick up the gauntlet.

Very good. Very, very good.

Simon, what are you going to go for, on this board?

Well, there's two or three that I can choose from.

I think I will go for Vienna, Ultravox.

Ultravox, says Simon, for Vienna.

Let's see how the people said Ultravox.

-39.

-APPLAUSE

39 for Ultravox.

Voted the best number two of all time.

-Yeah. I'll go along with that.

-You know what kept it off...

-Joe Dolce, Shaddap You Face.

-Shaddap You Face, yeah.

That's what kept Vienna off the number one spot.

-Thanks very much. Sarah, welcome back.

-Thank you.

-Our newest members of the 200 club.

-Thank you.

-Have you been up to the 200 club house, by the way?

-Yes!

-We've had it refurnished.

-Really nice!

-They've redesigned it.

I like what you did.

I had a lovely massage up there just before the show.

I keep meaning to do that and forgetting.

It's good. I tell you what, Heinz, his hands are magical. Aren't they?

-Does a great manicure as well.

-Extraordinary.

Heinz? And he does 57 different massages, which is brilliant!

-We should come up with a nickname for that guy.

-Should do.

Now, then, Sarah.

We want to know who had number two hits with these singles?

I know probably two or three.

I'm going to go for Downtown, and Petula Clark.

Petula Clark, says Sarah, for Downtown.

Let's see how many people said Petula Clark?

It is absolutely right.

-44!

-APPLAUSE

44, very popular, Petula Clark.

Well played, Sarah. They're all big scores so far.

Kept off the Christmas number one spot by I Feel Fine, by The Beatles.

-Thanks very much. Now, then, Jake, welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you.

-What do you do, Jake?

-I'm a civil engineer.

Any particular kind of area of civil engineering you do? Bridges?

I work in the power generation sector.

-It's about building power plants.

-Very good.

What are your hobbies?

I like horse racing. One of my favourite sports.

That's how I met Bob.

Do you go round to the race meets, or do you just follow it?

I live in Cheltenham, so I'm in the heartland of National Hunt racing.

Fantastic. Good stuff. Jake, you're the last person on this board.

Why not take us through and fill in the blanks for us?

I can't take you through it.

Fortunately, there is one left there that I know.

I'm going to go with Teenage Dirtbag, that's Wheatus.

Wheatus, says Jake. Let's see if that's right,

If it is, how many people said Wheatus for Teenage Dirtbag?

It is absolutely right.

-25.

-APPLAUSE

Our lowest score of the round, Jake.

Well played. That was kept off number one by Atomic Kitten, of all people,

with Whole Again.

Let's fill in the rest of this board.

Fairy Tale Of New York, the Pogues, featuring Kirsty MacColl.

That came number two on this list as well.

-Vienna was number one.

-Wow.

Fairy Tale Of New York was the second best number two of all time.

The first time round, it was kept off the Christmas number one spot by

Always On My Mind, by the Pet Shop Boys.

When I Fall In Love, that was Nat King Cole. Would have scored you 18.

-And American Pie.

-Don McLean.

That was kept off by Son Of My Father, by Chicory Tip.

And also, Without You, by Nilsson, which is probably fair enough.

Would have scored you 42 points.

-Some great songs on that board, aren't there?

-Yeah. Fantastic.

Thank you very much, Richard. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at the scores. 25, the best score of that pass, Jake.

Up to 26, Rose and Victoria.

Then up to 39, Simon and James.

And 44, Sarah and Del.

It is all pretty close, quite a nice grouping there.

But, yes, Del, you are ahead. Not far ahead. You are ahead.

We need a low score from you to make sure you're with us

beyond the end of the round. Best of luck.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

Let's put seven more number twos on the board, and here they come.

We have got:

I'll read those one last time.

We're looking for the artists who released these UK number twos.

Rob, you're trying to find the lowest scoring one on that board.

-Welcome, Rob. What do you do?

-I'm a civil servant.

-You also worked briefly in horse racing?

-I did, yes.

And then left it? What was the job you did in horse racing?

I was working for a national newspaper publication,

in the racing industry.

-And what bit of civil service do you work in?

-I can't really...

-Don't worry, no, it's fine. A spy.

-LAUGHTER

So, Rob, you are the first person to have this board.

So, why not find a nice, low-scoring answer there?

The last board was a little bit better for me.

But, fortunately, I do know one of them.

And I believe A Design For Life was the Manic Street Preachers.

Manic Street Preachers, says Rob, A Design For Life.

The high scorers, Adele and Sarah, on 44.

If you can score 18 or less,

you will avoid becoming the new high scorers.

There is your red line.

Let's see if the Manics get you below that.

It's right.

Oh, very well done indeed. Look at that, 13.

-APPLAUSE

-38, your total.

Well done, Rob, kept off the number one spot by Return Of The Mack,

by Mark Morrison.

Whenever we have people on the show who are spies, like Rob.

-Mm.

-LAUGHTER

They're always on podium four, have you noticed?

Yeah, no, they ask for that.

Is that so they can make a quick exit?

Sometimes, spies get called out at very short notice.

Spies, if they go into any room...

Rob, you don't have to tell us if it is correct, but it is.

-..they always check their different methods of exit.

-Yes.

-Always do.

-Ross Kemp told me that.

-Did he?

-Yeah, yeah.

That's how you know on podium two, James and Simon aren't spies.

Simon, I think, once did.

-He's done stuff.

-Don't get me wrong, yeah, he definitely has.

That's where he got his tae kwon do mastery.

You don't do tae kwon do whilst skiing

without having been in the Special Services at some point.

LAUGHTER

How does it feel to see a spy who's still active?

-Very reassuring.

-That's good.

Like seeing a torch passed from generation to generation.

-Yeah, that is nice.

-If Rob disappears at some point,

you know it's because the Belarusians have invaded.

So, then, Del?

We're looking for the artists who released these UK number twos.

-You're the high scorers, by the way.

-Yes, thank you!

I'm tempted by a few of them.

I can't avoid the temptation of Temptation,

one of my favourite all-time songs.

-Heaven 17.

-Heaven 17, fantastic.

Let's find out - Heaven 17,

how far down the column is that going to get you?

No red line for you at the moment because you're the highest scorers.

7. Very well done indeed.

Lowest score of the round by quite a margin.

51's your total.

I think that might be enough to keep you in the game, I don't know.

Best of luck anyway.

Del, you can resist anything but Temptation, can't you?

A very good answer.

Kept off the number one spot by True, by Spandau Ballet.

-Those were the days, weren't they?

-I know.

Seriously, if you look at any top 10 from the '80s, you can't believe...

A random top 10, pretty much every single song is a belting hit.

-I disagree with you, but...

-Really?

-LAUGHTER

The charts today are equally good.

I think there's maybe less variety these days.

In those days, the top 10 was full of mental stuff.

But the quality is just as good. That's my opinion.

OK.

RIPPLE OF LAUGHTER

James, welcome to the show. What do you do?

I am a researcher, just about to start a new post in London.

Can I ask what you are researching?

General health care research, the cardiovascular system principally.

Basically, research looking to improve patient care and outcomes.

Are you attached to a hospital?

I will be, yes, when I come to London.

And what do you do for your hobbies? What amuses you in your spare time?

Football, principally. I'm a big Newcastle United fan.

Watch any football if it's on TV.

Aside from that, if it's sport, I'm probably interested!

-OK, what about music?

-No.

-LAUGHTER

-Music is, it's not a strong suit. It never has been.

-OK.

And there are a handful of things that I'm singing through in my head

and they aren't helping.

So I'm going to have to have a punt - I'm not certain on anything.

The bottom one, Rolling In The Deep,

somebody who is singing a lot recently, that's Adele?

Rolling In The Deep, Adele, says James. Here comes your red line.

If you get below that, you are through to the next round.

Let's find out if Adele's right

and, if it is, how many of our 100 people said it.

It's absolutely right.

Flash!

37. Takes your total up to 76.

The big scores keep on coming, don't they?

That was kept off number one by Grenade by Bruno Mars.

She also got to number two with Chasing Pavements and Skyfall.

-Both of those were number two singles as well.

-Mmm.

But she's sold a lot of albums so I don't think she's too worried.

I don't think she'll mind. Now, Victoria. Victoria.

Hiya.

Hi there. Welcome to the show. Great to have you.

-What do you do, Victoria?

-I'm a freelance fashion designer.

Where are you based, in London?

Well, I was based in London but I've just moved back up north.

-Did you design the dress you're wearing?

-Not this one.

My final collection was men's sportswear, velvet,

so it didn't really suit.

Velvet sportswear?! Do you wear sportswear?

Yeah, I wear a lot of velvet sportswear, too.

And it's just, you know what? I just find it comfortable.

You have it sort of emblazoned with things.

If I ever take up sport

I'm probably going to use it for that as well.

-But, um, it's just nice, isn't it? It's casual...

-Yeah.

Washes well. LAUGHTER

You can accessorise very, very easily with it.

There you are. There, true fact, exactly. No word of a lie.

What are your hobbies, Victoria?

Music should be quite a good round, hopefully.

I'll say that and get them wrong, but, yeah, bands,

I like to go and see bands and just live music.

Good-oh. Now, what are you going to go for?

You're on 26. Talk us through the board, if you can.

The first one's Sparks.

Second one's The Kinks, Waterloo Sunset, Jean Genie, Bowie.

Take On Me was A-ha.

So I think I might go with Sparks,

for This Town Ain't Big Enough For The Both Of Us.

Sparks, says Victoria.

Now, you want to be scoring 49 or less

to get through to the next round. Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, how many of our 100 people said Sparks.

Very well done, you're through.

22.

APPLAUSE

48 your total, and you're through.

Brilliant work, Victoria, very well done.

Can I also say, very nice to hear someone in their 20s not saying,

"These are before my time, so I don't know them."

You're right about all of the others.

Waterloo Sunset, before you were born, but it was The Kinks,

would have scored 42. Jean Genie, before you were born

but it was Bowie, would have scored 49.

Take On Me, was that before you were born as well? Don't depress me!

That would have scored 41, it was A-ha.

Thanks very much indeed. So at the end of our first round,

the pair who are heading home, I'm afraid it's James and Simon,

who have scored 76. Not a very high score there

but everyone managed to score pretty low in this round.

You just happened to be the highest.

Anyway, James and Simon, we'll look forward to seeing you again

next time, and thanks very much for playing. Thanks, James and Simon.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

And so now, only three pairs remain.

At the end of this round, we will be sending another pair home.

This is going to be a very exciting round.

Jake and Rob are our lowest-scoring pair

and Sarah and Del had Del's brilliant Heaven 17 answer,

which was the lowest individual contestant score.

And then Rose and Victoria had identical scores, each on 22.

So there's something to recommend each of you.

ALEXANDER SIGHS

Could be impossible to call, this one.

Anyway, best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for round two is Leaders.

Leaders. Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns post-war ABC leaders.

Post-war ABC leaders.

Xander's going to show you a list of five political positions.

We're looking for anybody who's held any of these positions since 1945,

whose surname begins with an A, B or C.

We're going to need their full names.

There's a lot of names on the list, surprisingly enough.

OK, thanks very much indeed. So as Richard says, we're going to put five positions up on the board.

And you just have to provide the names of anyone who's held one of those positions

whose name begins with an A, B or C. Here are those five positions.

OK, so we're looking for anyone whose surname begins with A, B or C

who has held one of those positions since the end of World War II.

Now, Victoria, I'm going to give you just a second or two

to marshal your thoughts.

Right, this is a bit of a tricky one. Erm...

Jacques Chirac.

OK.

Jacques Chirac, says Victoria. Let's see if that's right,

and if it is, how many of our 100 people said Jacques Chirac.

It's absolutely right.

A good answer. Look at that.

10, Victoria, very well done, good start to the round.

Another good answer, Victoria, well played.

He was the one who famously slagged off British food, Jacques Chirac.

-Must've been many other things he did.

-Mm.

He said the worst food in Europe was Finnish food.

I'm not sure if I've ever had Finnish food.

Have you not? It's all right.

Difficult to finish(!)

Er, Del.

Well, I was thinking of trying to get a clever answer,

but it's not going to happen.

James Callaghan.

James Callaghan, says Del.

Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many people said that.

15 for James Callaghan.

That's a good answer, Del.

The only 20th century politician to hold all four great offices of state,

Prime Minister, Chancellor, Foreign Secretary and Home Secretary.

Thanks, Richard. Rob.

Rob.

Hello.

How are we feeling about this?

Reasonable. I think I've got a couple of answers.

Prime Minister of Canada, no idea.

There's one major one for Italy,

but I think that will score pretty highly.

So I am going to go with Jimmy Carter for President of the USA.

Jimmy Carter says Rob. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people said Jimmy Carter.

That's right.

12.

Hammering C at the moment, aren't we? A and B not getting a look in at all.

Yeah, he was president just before Reagan,

-and won the Nobel Peace Prize in 2002.

-Thanks.

We're halfway though the round. Let's take a look at those scores.

10 the best score of that pass, Victoria. Very well done indeed.

Lovely low score there. Then up to 12 where we find Rob and Jake.

Up to 15, Del and Sarah.

Once again, Sarah, we need a nice low score from you in the next pass.

How are you feeling about this?

-All right?

-OK.

Good luck. We're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium.

OK. Jake, now, Rob scored 12. Not a bad score.

If you wanted to avoid becoming the new high scorers,

you'd have to score 2 or less.

Remember we're looking for anyone who's held one of these positions

since the end of World War II, whose surname begins with A, B or C.

OK. Well, a couple here, like Rob.

Trying to avoid the UK ones,

cos I think they may be a bit more obvious.

I'm going to go for a president of the USA.

I'm going to go for George Bush Senior.

George Bush Senior, says Jake.

George Bush Senior.

Here comes your red line, for what it's worth. Very low.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said George Bush Senior.

It's right.

32.

-32 takes your total up to 44.

-Good answer, though.

They've all been good answers.

-Amazing how many of them are A, B and C, isn't it?

-Yeah.

-I still haven't thought of a good one, though.

-Oh, have you not?

-No.

Uh-oh.

LAUGHTER

Sarah, you now have a target, which is good.

The high scorers are Jake and Rob on 44,

so if you can score 28 or less, you are through to the head-to-head.

Erm...

There's something about what you said

made me think you had a brilliant answer up your sleeve.

No.

-OK.

-But I'll go... I'm going to hijack an answer.

I'm going to say George Bush Junior.

OK. George Bush Junior.

-There is your red line.

-George Bush.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is,

let's see how many of our 100 people said George Bush Junior.

Well, it's right.

32 is what Senior scored. 32 is what Junior scores. There we are.

That takes your total up to 47.

-Yeah, scored exactly the same. Quite surprising, isn't it?

-Hmm.

You would have thought maybe he would have scored a little bit more.

Although with films, sequels always get less, don't they?

-I guess he was the sequel.

-It's true.

Now, Rose. You're on 10. Great score from Victoria in the first pass.

The high scorers are now Sarah and Del on 47.

So 36 or less...sees you through.

Mm, well, I'm not sure whether to take a punt or play it a bit safe.

36.

Mm, I think I'm going to play it a bit safe

and say Prime Minister of Italy, Silvio Berlusconi.

OK, Berlusconi, says Rose. Berlusconi. Silvio Berlusconi.

There's your red line.

If you get below that, you're in the head-to-head.

Let's find out how many of our 100 people said Silvio Berlusconi.

It's right.

Well done. Very well done. 29.

39, your total. You're in the head-to-head.

Very, very well played.

Funnily enough, Rose, there's two British prime ministers

that would have seen you through.

Clement Attlee would have scored you 18.

Gordon Brown would have scored 27 points.

27 for Gordon.

-He never scores well on this show, does he?

-No, he doesn't.

LAUGHTER

There's a lot of pointless answers,

but they're almost all Italian prime ministers.

There's one French President as well. Let's look at some of the names.

These are all Italian prime ministers.

..would have been a pointless answer.

Also pointless. Well done if you got any of these.

If you know your Italian politics, you're laughing.

Vincent Auriol, who was a French president.

I told you the best scorers for the Brits.

For France, Rene Coty would have scored you 1.

Jacques Chirac we've already had.

The Italian prime ministers we've already done.

The president of the USA,

the only one we haven't had is Bill Clinton,

who would have scored you 30 points.

The Canadian prime ministers. None of them were pointless.

You would have got 3 points for Joe Clark. 3 for Kim Campbell.

Jean Chretien would have scored you 4 points.

Let's take a look at the top three answers,

the ones that most of our 100 people said.

Isn't that amazing, how many of them begin A, B and C?!

-Mm.

-I know that's why we did the round, but isn't it amazing?

Do you think it's cos they all sat at the front of classes?

Yeah, I wonder if it is.

-That's why they all paid attention.

-Yeah.

-Well, exactly.

-Alexander Armstrong.

-Yeah.

Now look at me.

You've done very well for yourself.

Thank you very much, Richard.

So at the end of our second round, it's Sarah and Del,

with a score of 47, which is really very low, considering.

It's very close, actually. 44, 39, 47.

You just happened to be out in front.

I'm afraid we have to say goodbye to you, our last remaining

returning pair. It's been great having you on both shows.

I'm sorry to have to say goodbye to you now. Thanks so much for playing.

-Great contestants.

-APPLAUSE

But for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Jake and Rob, Rose and Victoria.

You are now one step closer to the final and a chance to

play for our jackpot, which currently stands at...

We have to decide who's going to play for that money.

To do that, you are now going to go head-to-head.

The difference is you are now allowed to confer

before you give your answer.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that money.

Now, Jake and Rob, very well done.

You've done well throughout the show,

and you've made sure that you've come through to the head-to-head

as the lowest scoring pair, meaning you get to stand on that podium,

which means, Rob, you are still close to the exit, so that's good.

-LAUGHTER

-Rose and Victoria, very well done.

Some great answers from you as well throughout the show.

I think now you can put your heads together,

this is going to be very, very close indeed.

Let's play the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

OK, here comes your first question. It concerns...

Football club nicknames, Richard.

We're going to give you five visual clues now to nicknames of teams

that play in the English League.

We just need you to tell us the name of the teams, please.

Very, very best of luck.

OK, thanks very much. Let's reveal our five visual clues.

Here they come. We have got...

There we are. Five visual clues to football club nicknames.

Jake and Rob, you've played best throughout the show so far,

so you get to go first.

(The Cottagers - Fulham.)

(B is the Posh - Peterborough.

(C is the Rams - Derby.)

(Pretty sure The Cherries is Bournemouth, but I'm not sure.)

We are going to say B, Peterborough United.

B, Peterborough United.

Now then, Rose and Victoria, do you think you can take us

through the rest of the board?

-No.

-Not at all.

Do you want to maybe just think through some of them?

We were thinking the Spice Boys maybe,

but that isn't the name of a club.

Cottage. Rams. Rotherham Rams? I don't know.

I honestly don't have a clue on any of them.

If there was one that played in red could be Cherries, maybe.

-I don't know.

-What do you want to go for?

Do you want to do Rotherham?

Something like Red Cherries, so Man United, the Red Cherries.

You will say Manchester United for D.

Manchester United for D. OK.

Jake and Rob said Peterborough United for B.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is,

let's see how many people said Peterborough United.

It's right.

-17.

-APPLAUSE

Rose and Victoria have gone for The Red Cherries,

or as they're otherwise known, Manchester United.

-The Red Cherries.

-LAUGHTER

Let's see if that's right and, if it is,

let's see how many people said Manchester United.

No.

Red cross, I'm afraid.

Which means, Jake and Rob, after one question, you are up 1-0.

It's logically a good answer, but, yeah, very well played, Jake and Rob.

Peterborough United's nickname is The Posh.

D is not Manchester United. The Cherries are Bournemouth.

That would have scored you 12 points.

A is the Cottagers, that is Fulham.

23 points. We don't tend to use The Cottagers so much any more.

We call ourselves The White.

C is The Rams. That's Derby County.

That would have scored you 45.

E is The Toffees and that is Everton. That would have scored you 44.

Very well done if you got all five of those.

Anyway, thank you, Richard. Here comes your second question.

Rose and Victoria, you get to answer this one first,

but you have to win it to stay in the game. Best of luck.

It concerns...

I'm going to show you five pairs of initials now.

They're the initials of an actor, the initials of a film

and the year in which that actor won the Best Actor Oscar in that film.

Can you tell us the actor and the film, please?

OK, let's reveal our sets of initials. Here they come.

I'll read those all one last time.

Rose and Victoria, you will go first this time.

I think we're going to go for the top one.

Colin Firth, The King's Speech.

Colin Firth, The King's Speech,

say Rose and Victoria.

Now then, Jake and Rob, can you talk us through the rest of the board?

Tom Hanks, the second one down, Forrest Gump.

Russell Crowe, Gladiator.

Any thoughts on the last two?

No, I don't. I don't know either of the last two.

Wouldn't have got The King's Speech either.

What do you think?

We'll go for Russell Crowe, Gladiator.

Russell Crowe, Gladiator, say Jake and Rob.

So we have Colin Firth and The King's Speech,

and Russell Crowe and Gladiator.

Rose and Victoria said The King's Speech with Colin Firth.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is,

let's see how many people said that.

It's right.

13. Good answer.

Jake and Rob have gone for Russell Crowe, Gladiator.

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many people said that.

It's right.

It's got to beat 13.

Oh, which it does. Look at that. 6 for Gladiator.

Very well done indeed.

Jake and Rob, after only two questions,

-you are through to the final 2-0.

-Well played, Jake and Rob.

Very low scoring from our 100 on this round, actually.

The biggest score is the bottom one, which is...

Do you know the bottom one?

Jack Nicholson, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest.

That is correct. That would have scored you 15 points.

The second one down?

Tom Hanks, Forrest Gump.

Forrest Gump, yes. That would have scored you 10 points.

DH / RM is the best answer on the board.

Surprisingly difficult to get that.

-Dustin Hoffman, Rain Man.

-Oh, well done.

Dustin Hoffman, Rain Man.

Would have scored 4 points if you'd got it in time.

Dustin Hoffman, Rain Man.

Thanks very much indeed.

So the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

I'm afraid it's Rose and Victoria.

Yes, The Cherries. That was tough, that one.

-But there we are. Might you have got Bournemouth?

-No.

-No.

-Smoggies for Middlesbrough. That's about it.

-Fair enough.

The good news for us is that we get to see you again next time,

cos if you'd gone through to the final, that would have been it.

Only one Pointless show. But you'll be back next time.

We look forward to that.

Rose and Victoria, thanks very much meanwhile.

But for Jake and Rob, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Jake and Rob, you've seen off all

the competition and you've won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at...

Well, you've done very, very well.

Only one appearance on Pointless - a 2-0 victory in the head-to-head.

No arguing with that.

What would you like to see come up in this last round?

For me, Geography I'm quite strong on.

-I'll take Geography.

-Sport as well.

Sport would be a good one.

OK, well, best of luck.

As always, you kick this round off by choosing a category.

You have four rounds to choose from. They are...

What do you think?

Well... I've spent quite a bit of time in France.

I shouldn't say that, but French Culture maybe.

I don't know much about Madrid.

Unless it's football teams, but there's only two, isn't there?

-As far as I know.

-Yeah, absolutely.

-I think it's got to be French Culture.

-OK, French Culture it is.

Richard.

Yeah, you've got three categories within French Culture for you.

We are looking for

the title of any Victor Hugo novel.

We are looking for the name of any feature film made for cinema

release for which Audrey Tautou has received an acting credit,

or we are looking for any act who has represented

France in the Eurovision Song Contest.

Up to March 2013 for Audrey Tautou, and up to 2012 for Eurovision.

Victor Hugo Novels, Audrey Tautou films or French Eurovision acts.

Very, very best of luck.

Thanks very much. As always, you've got up to one minute

to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that jackpot of £3,000 is for just

one of those answers to be pointless.

Remember, the answers you give can come from any of these categories.

It's up to you how you spread them across the categories.

They can all come from the same category or one from each.

-It's entirely up to you. Are you ready?

-Yep.

-Ready.

OK, let's put 60 seconds on the clock. There they are.

Your time starts now.

-Right, have we got any Victor Hugo novels?

-Absolutely not.

OK. Audrey Tautou films. I've got a couple of French films.

-Don't know if it's Audrey Tautou. Les Parapluies de Cherbourg.

-OK.

What about Le Diner de Cons?

I don't know. I don't know.

Mostly men in that, so I'm not sure if that would be...

-Any Eurovision acts?

-No Eurovision acts whatsoever.

OK, let's go for three French films.

I know another French film. I think it's called Le Commode.

But, again, I don't know if any of these have Audrey Tautou in them.

Again, she's fairly famous.

I'll assume Parapluies de Cherbourg possibly has her in.

Red Balloon is a film set in Paris. It's a silent film.

I don't know if she appears in it, perhaps at some point.

-What's the French film you named?

-Le Diner de Cons.

I think we should name three French films and hope for the best.

-It's all we've got. I think that's it.

-I think that's it.

-OK, are you happy to stop the clock?

-Yeah, yeah.

OK, we'll stop the clock there.

What three answers are you going to give me?

There's a French film that I've seen called Le Diner de Cons.

-Le Diner de Cons.

-I don't know if Audrey Tautou's in it, but...

Throw that one up there.

I'll go with Les Parapluies de Cherbourg.

Les Parapluies de Cherbourg.

We'll try Red Balloon.

-Well, we have to go... Red Balloon.

-Red Balloon.

Of those three, are there any that you'd like to nominate as your...?

-They're probably all as unlikely as each other, to be honest.

-OK.

-We'll put Le Diner de Cons first.

-Le Diner de Cons first.

-Red Balloon last.

-Red Balloon last.

OK, let's put those three answers on the board in that order.

Here they are. We have got...

Best of luck. Your first answer was Le Diner de Cons.

Now, if this is right, and that's quite a big if, bit of a guess,

but still it's a French film, she's French.

Maybe she's in it.

-Can't be that many French people. Or films.

-There really aren't.

There are hardly any.

LAUGHTER

If this is right and it is pointless, you will win £1,000.

What would you do with your share of that, Jake?

Well, I recently moved house. I brought with me a fairly old,

worn terracotta sofa which my girlfriend detests.

A terracotta sofa? Oh, I see. The colour of terracotta.

Not made of terracotta.

LAUGHTER

I wouldn't like that either.

It's going to be quite fragile.

Fair enough. Rob?

I'll probably have a couple of weeks off working. Drive around Europe.

-See a bit of Europe.

-Maybe take in a couple of films in France.

A bit of French culture, I think.

OK, well, best of luck. The first answer, Le Diner de Cons.

Let's find out if it's right.

If it's pointless, it will give you that jackpot.

So for £1,000, is Audrey Tautou in Le Diner de Cons?

No, she's not. Bad luck. OK, first answer down. Two answers to go.

Your second answer was Les Parapluies de Cherbourg.

Let's see if that's right.

Again, if it's pointless, it will win you that jackpot.

For £1,000, let's find out if Audrey Tautou

was in Les Parapluies de Cherbourg.

No, bad luck.

I'm afraid she wasn't in that either.

Oh, she's got to be in one of them. Surely!

This is your third and final answer - Red Balloon.

If it's right and it's pointless, it will win you £1,000.

Let's find out. Is Audrey Tautou in Red Balloon?

No, bad luck.

I'm sorry.

That was a really, really tough board.

Usually there'd be a football avenue to go down or something like that.

I'm sorry there wasn't on this occasion.

You didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer.

You didn't manage to find that all-important correct answer,

which means, I'm afraid, you don't win today's jackpot of £1,000.

That will roll over on to the next show.

But we've really enjoyed having you on the show.

You've done a fantastic job throughout, up till this point.

You do get to take home the Pointless trophy, so very well done.

APPLAUSE

Yeah, you played brilliantly, guys. Very well done.

The key is if I put the category France, that might have sport,

but French Culture, I can't really justify putting

a sport one in it, you see?

There it is. Le Diner de Cons is a terrific film.

They remade it very badly in Hollywood a couple of years later

with Steve Carell, but not Audrey Tautou.

Not The Umbrellas of Cherbourg either.

You might be thinking of The Flight Of The Red Balloon,

a Juliette Binoche film, but not Audrey Tautou.

Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers.

Victor Hugo novels - Bug-Jargal.

Han Of Iceland, which was his first novel.

Le Dernier Jour D'un Condamne and Ninety-Three,

which is his last novel. All of those pointless.

Audrey Tautou films - A Very Long Engagement.

She's in the British thriller Dirty Pretty Things.

Stephen Frears directed it.

Nowhere To Go But Up and Pot Luck, all of those were pointless.

French Eurovision acts - Andre Claveau,

all of these have won Eurovision. Andre Claveau, Anne-Marie David.

She represented France but won for Luxembourg.

Isabelle Aubret and Marie Myriam. All of them won it

for every single Eurovision entry

apart from Patricia Kaas, Sebastien Tellier, Ortal and Amina,

all of them were pointless.

So our big Eurovision fans out there,

if you got someone other than those,

you've you just got a pointless answer.

Sorry the category didn't fall for you today. You played ever so well.

Thanks very much. Unfortunately we have to say goodbye to you.

It's been brilliant having you on the show.

Thank you for playing. Great contestants.

-Sorry that last round was so hard.

-APPLAUSE

Well, sadly Jake and Rob didn't win our jackpot today, which means

it rolls over on to the next show when we will be playing for £2,000.

Join us next time to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me, goodbye.