Episode 16 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

the show that makes big winners out of the lowest scorers.

Let's meet today's players.

APPLAUSE

-Couple number one.

-Hello, I'm Paddy, this is my brother, Brendan,

-and we're from Glasgow.

-Couple number two.

Hi, I'm Aleisha, this is my husband, Tim, and we're from Bristol.

-Couple number three.

-My name's Bob, this is my son, George,

and we're from Dorking in Surrey.

-And finally, couple number four.

-Hi, I'm Julie, this is my friend, Sonia.

We're from Haverfordwest in Pembrokeshire.

These are today's contestants.

APPLAUSE

A warm welcome to you all, as ever. Thank you very much for that.

We'll find out more about you as the show goes along.

That just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

At weekends, he busks by recounting brilliant facts

for loose change and crisps. It's my Pointless friend, Richard.

-Hiya. Hi, everybody.

-APPLAUSE

-Good afternoon to you.

-And to you.

-We've given away four jackpots in a row.

-I know.

We had that £8,500-odd, then gave that away,

and then three more jackpots in a row after that, so four in a row.

Could we make it five today?

We've got two very strong returning pairs, so we may well.

Tim and Aleisha got all the way to the head-to-head

and Bob and George also got knocked out in the second round

on that round where we translated Beatles songs into French.

-That was fun.

-It was, wasn't it?

Not so much fun for Bob and George, but fun for everyone else.

-It was fun for him, not for me.

-Yeah, quite, George.

Should be a cracker and maybe we see five jackpots in a row,

-you never know. Seen it before.

-What's our record? Seven?

-Seven jackpots in a row.

-OK, very good. So, we're nearing that.

Lara and Emily, as you'll have gathered, won the jackpot last time,

so today's jackpot starts off back at £1,000. There it is.

If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

APPLAUSE

It's very simple. All you have to remember is this.

The pair with the highest score at the end of each round

will be eliminated. Best of luck to all four pairs.

Our first category this afternoon is...

It's a Words round.

Can you decide in your pairs who's going first, who's going second

and whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

And the question concerns...

Commonly-confused words.

Slightly different to our normal Words rounds.

On the oxforddictionaries.com website,

they have a list of commonly-confused words -

words that are spelt differently but sound the same,

and words that people confuse.

On each board, we'll show you seven pairs of definitions of those words.

You just need to give us the words, please.

There will be seven on each board,

14 in all to have a go at home. Best of luck.

There we are. A brand-new kind of round on Pointless.

We haven't had one like this before. Very exciting.

We are looking for the words that are commonly confused.

Here are their definitions.

I'll read those one last time.

-Now, Brendan, welcome here from Glasgow.

-Yes.

What do you do, Brendan?

I've just graduated from the University of Glasgow.

-What were you reading?

-Literature.

-Very good.

-Have you got anything lined up now you've left?

-Nothing just now, no.

I do a wee bit of writing,

so I'm hoping to get a couple of stories published in a collection.

Very good. What do you like to get up to when you're not writing?

I play a bit of football. I like doing outdoors activities,

so I volunteer with Community Woodland

and I've also recently got quite into gardening,

so I grow my own vegetables, or attempt to grow them anyway.

-What's been the most successful veg so far?

-So far has been courgettes.

-Mmm.

-Tried sweetcorn, but it's not really happening.

Hasn't quite worked.

-I grew one of those little red courgettes the other day.

-Oh, yeah?

LAUGHTER

Brendan, what are you going to go for?

I know one or two but I think, because I'm used to doing this,

I'll go with the second one and I will say "Draught".

"Draught", says Brendan.

Let's see if it's right and how many people said it.

It is right.

Ooh, 76. APPLAUSE

76. That is quite high.

76.

A pretty big score for "Draught" and, indeed, for "Draft".

-Mmm.

-Mmm.

-Thanks very much.

Tim, welcome back. Tim, what a performance last time.

-Thanks.

-Straight through to the head-to-head,

as our lowest scorers by quite a margin and then, suddenly, 2-0.

You were taken to the cleaners.

It's the way the cookie crumbles, I guess.

Tim, remind us what you do.

I'm a government communications officer.

And you've done that for how long?

-Five years and I was a former journalist.

-A former journalist.

Of the two professions, which do you prefer?

-Both gave me great enjoyment and challenge...

-Tactful.

-Thank you.

But since doing the job I do now, I haven't really looked back,

-so I love what I do.

-This is a good thing.

Tim, what would you like to go for?

OK, I have a good idea of a few of those,

it's just working out which might give me the lowest answer,

so I think I'll go for the one right at the bottom,

which I think "Assent".

"Assent", says Tim.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said "Assent".

34 for "Assent". APPLAUSE

Sounds good to me.

Well played, Tim.

-If you agree to climb a mountain, you assent to ascent.

-That's right.

Or if you agree to release a fragrance, which I've just done.

-Oh, I wondered what that was and I did not assent to that scent.

-No.

Thanks very much indeed. So, George, welcome back.

It's a pleasure to be with you again.

We had to say goodbye to you at the end of the second round last time.

You did indeed. I will study up on my French,

but this is a nice board.

This is a better board.

George, before I plunge you into that board,

let's just talk a bit about what you do.

I guess my hobby, my love, is, as I said, working for Whizz-Kidz,

but I spend most of my time studying for a degree in philosophy,

politics and international relations at Royal Holloway.

When you finish, George, cos you've been...

You sort of run Whizz-Kidz, you're the Chair of Whizz-Kidz, aren't you?

You do an awful lot of stuff for them.

I have done 300 events so far, so 300 events in five years,

so I've been lucky enough to meet an awful lot of people

but it's just a great joy of mine to see the development in others

and to see the next generation of Tanni Grey-Thompsons,

Frank Gardners, Ade Adepitans come through the ranks

-and inspire the next generation.

-Well, hats off to you, George.

When you graduate, what do you think you'll go on and do?

Will you stay in that kind of role?

It certainly is in my blood, but I have policy or strategy in mind,

-but we will see.

-We will see.

-I've got to graduate first.

-You have.

I have no doubt you'll do that with flying colours as well.

-George, what do you want to go for on this board?

-I know two of those.

The bottom one, "Assent/ Ascent", was what I'd have gone for,

but I will go "Rough in texture/ route or direction",

-and say "Coarse".

-"Coarse". "Coarse", says George.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said "Coarse".

It's right. 76 is our high score, 34 is our low.

Look at that! "Coarse".

-George!

-14, George. APPLAUSE

Good job you didn't go for "Assent/ Ascent".

Very good answer indeed.

I used to live in a house that had a sort of very rough carpeting

outside the loo, so it had a coarse course to the bathroom.

I'm trying to think of ways to use both words in a sentence.

It's quite difficult, but I remembered that.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Now, Julie, a very warm welcome to Pointless

-to you from Haverfordwest.

-Yes.

-What do you do, Julie?

-I'm a supervisor in a kitchen.

And what do you do when you're allowed out of the kitchen?

I like to enter competitions in magazines. I enter them every week.

-Have you ever won?

-No.

LAUGHTER

Do you ever have any idea...? Have you ever been on a shortlist?

Have you ever got close to winning? I suppose you'll never know.

I don't think so. I've only been doing them 12 years,

-so that's not too bad.

-Every week for 12 years.

-Keep it up, Julie.

-I shall.

-You know, one of these days...

What's been the most exciting thing you haven't yet won?

-Oh, big holidays, £10,000, lots of things.

-Very good.

Well, best of luck with that, Julie. This board's all yours.

If you want to go through it and fill in all our blanks,

-that would be brilliant.

-I know the second one up is "Freeze".

But I'm going to go for the third one down and say "Horde".

You're going to say "Horde".

Let's see how many of our 100 people agree with Julie. "Horde".

It's right.

Not bad at all. 25 for "Horde".

APPLAUSE

Well played, Julie.

Between the four of you,

you got three of the four best answers up on the board.

There's only one you missed out on and that is the top one,

-which is the best answer of all. Do you know that one?

-Um, no.

Anyone?

"Pour" is the answer. "Pour" and "Pore".

-That would have scored 8 points.

-Oh, yeah.

-That's good, isn't it?

-"Not moving/ writing materials" is...

-Stationary.

-Stationary.

And "Freeze", you're quite right, but you chose the right one,

in fact, cos "Freeze" would have scored you far more.

-Would have scored you 64.

-Thank you, Richard.

We're halfway through the round. Let's look at those scores.

14 the best score of that pass.

Very well done, George.

Bob and George looking strong on the back of that.

25 for Julie and Sonia

and then 34 for Tim and Aleisha. Now, Brendan and Paddy,

we need to discuss this 76 issue.

That was a very high score.

I'm not sure why, it just seemed to appeal to our 100.

So, Paddy, we need something

more in the order of what George gave in the next pass.

Best of luck with that.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

Let's put seven more pairs of definitions up on the board

and here they are.

I'll read those one last time.

So, Sonia, a warm welcome to Pointless to you.

Also from Haverfordwest. What do you do, Sonia?

I'm a cleaner for Royal Mail.

Very good and how do you and Julie know each other?

Well, Julie's my landlady and good friend.

Landlady/ tenant - that's a relationship we haven't had.

I'm not sure we have. That's quite a dangerous one, Sonia. Are you sure?

Yeah, yeah.

She has to put up with me and my partner, so that's a combination.

-So, this is payback for her?

-Yeah, basically.

-It's nice though. She introduced you as her friend.

-Yeah.

-So, clearly, you're paying the rent, which is good.

-Yeah.

-Oh, yeah.

-Unless one of us gets 100, I have to leave the house or...?

-Or I do.

-Or she does.

-LAUGHTER

Sonia, what are you going to go for?

A bit tricky for me, to be honest with you.

I think I know three of them on there,

but I'm going to go for the one that I'm definitely sure of

and that is a "table in a church" or "to change",

and that is to "Alter".

"Alter". You want to score 50 or less with that.

There's your red line. If you get below that

with "Alter", you are through to Round Two.

Let's see how many of our 100 said "Alter".

That's a high one. APPLAUSE

77 takes your total up to 102

and gives Paddy a bit of a lifeline there.

The Spanish royal family got in trouble last year

for altering their Christmas photograph.

It was King Juan Carlos, his wife and their grandchildren.

They denied it at first, then it was pointed out

that King Juan Carlos's leg had been amputated in the photograph

-cos they'd photoshopped it.

-Interesting.

-Interesting, eh?

-There we are. Thank you very much indeed.

Now, Bob, welcome back to Pointless.

We discovered last time that you publish a seismology journal.

-Magazine, yes.

-What are your interests aside from that?

-What else do you like to get up to?

-I play pool.

I won the Dorking Pool League a couple of times.

-Hang on, so you play pool in a sort of rather serious way.

-It's...

George finds it hilarious.

It gets you in the pub on Mondays.

I think that's basically why you play pool, on a pub circuit,

-kind of thing.

-But you're quite good though?

I like to think so, but...

Around Dorking, I imagine they take their pool quite seriously.

They do, indeed, yeah. It's quite brutal sometimes.

-It's a hotbed, Dorking. Known for its pool.

-Oh.

Hence the expression "Dorking pool".

LAUGHTER

Bob, what would you like to go for on this board?

If you score 87 or less, you're through to the next round.

I think I know them all.

Um, let's go with "Most important/ rule governing one's behaviour".

-"Principal".

-"Principal" says Bob.

Here's your red line. Get below this with "Principal",

you're through to the next round.

Well done.

APPLAUSE

This is good, Bob. Takes your total up to 29.

Sees you very comfortably into the next round. Well done.

Good answer, Bob. Yeah, "Principal" and "Principle". Safely through.

Thanks, Richard. Now, Aleisha, welcome back.

Remind us what you do.

-I'm a media and communications manager in the NHS.

-In the NHS.

When you're not doing that, what do you get up to?

I'm a mum. I've got an 18-month old son,

so that keeps us very busy and on our toes.

-Gardening, a bit of yoga, when I can manage it.

-Very good indeed.

Aleisha, if you can score 67 or less,

you are through to the next round.

I think I know two, but I am going to play it safe

because I'm not hugely confident in that board.

So, I'm going to say "A young deer or mythical being"

as "Fawn".

"Fawn". Let's see if that's right. Here's your red line.

Get below that and you're into the next round.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said "Fawn".

Very well done indeed.

APPLAUSE 69 is your total.

Well played, Aleisha.

-Our two returning pairs playing very nicely indeed, aren't they?

-Mmm.

-A colour as well, of course, fawn.

-There we go.

Paddy, finally, finally.

-Welcome.

-Thank you.

Good to have you here. What do you do?

I'm still studying at university, doing history and sociology.

-Very good indeed. Richard?

-Yeah.

-I have a hunch they might be twins.

-You think?

-They're brothers, aren't they?

-They're not dressed alike.

-Oh, maybe they're not.

-Maybe they're not. You're definitely twins, aren't you?

-Yes.

-Yes.

-You are most certainly twins.

It's nice of you, Paddy, not to have shaved

and to have grown the sideburns, cos that makes it a great deal easier.

Because I'm 15 minutes older, so...

I did think that maturity's just sort of coming through.

Sorry, Brendan. Lovely, but Paddy's just...

At what age did you grow tired of confusing people?

-Never.

-Never?

-No. I'm actually Brendan.

LAUGHTER

It's the gift that keeps on giving, isn't it?

Now, Paddy, you are the last person to have this board,

so make of it what you will.

The other board was better for me.

The top one, I don't know. The other ones...

The bottom one, I think, would maybe be "Campaign",

but I don't think that's a type of strong cloth, somehow.

I'll just go for the bottom one,

"Campaign".

OK, "Campaign", says Paddy. Here is your red line.

If you get below that, you are into the next round, but is it right?

"Campaign".

No, I'm sorry, Paddy.

I'm afraid you're right. "Campaign" is not a material.

That scores you 100 points,

takes your total up to 176.

Not "Campaign", Paddy. You'll know the answer as soon as I say it.

It's "Canvas".

-"Canvas" is the answer.

-I often know the answers

-as soon as you say them.

-Would have scored 52 points.

Yes, I know. You're very good at that.

The branch of a tree/ front end of a ship?

-"Bough".

-"Bough", yeah.

-That would have scored you 63. The next one?

-"Breach".

-"Breach".

-I nearly said "Butt". "Butt", in a way.

-Yeah.

-Yeah, maybe not.

-10 points for that.

And "Intentionally unobtrusive/ separate and distinct"?

-"Discreet" and "discrete".

-That would have scored 19.

So "Breach" and "Breech" best answer up there.

Thank you very much indeed. At the end of our first round,

the pair heading home, with our high score of 176,

Paddy and Brendan, I'm sorry to say it is you.

-"Canvas". Might you have got that?

-I should have.

It's always hard when the lights are on. When the lights are on?

LAUGHTER You know what I mean.

Anyway, Paddy, Brendan, we'll see you again next time.

I'm sure you'll do much better then. Thanks for playing.

Great contestants. APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

APPLAUSE

Well done, everyone.

You've made it to Round Two, Tim and Aleisha, Bob and George,

for the second time. Welcome to Round Two, Sonia and Julie.

Special mention to Bob and George for lowest individual score,

lowest combined score as well. Best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two this afternoon is...

It's Politicians.

Can you decide in your pairs who's going first, who's going second.

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

Let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name

as many of the 2015 post-election Conservative cabinet as they could.

The 2015 post-election cabinet.

We're looking for the name of any MP or peer who was appointed

to the Conservative cabinet after the 2015 general election, please.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. Now then, Aleisha.

-I'm going to say Michael Gove.

-Michael Gove, says Aleisha.

Let's see if that's right

and how many of our 100 people said Michael Gove.

It's right.

APPLAUSE

-24 for Michael Gove.

-Lord Chancellor

-and Secretary of State for Justice.

-Who knew?

And there was a point in 2015

where he got the same glasses as me.

I don't know what I think about that.

Ah, he may not have the same size as you.

-I'd imagine he'd have a slightly smaller frame.

-Maybe smaller.

They look fairly similar.

-The prescription may be different, I don't know about that.

-That's true.

But certainly the look, the style, is very similar

and he wears it as if he's the first person ever to think of it.

Come off it, Gove.

LAUGHTER

George, what would you like to go for?

I will go for the...Michael Gove's successor, Nicky Morgan.

Nicky Morgan, says George.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Nicky Morgan.

It's right. 24 is our only score at this point

and Nicky Morgan, I suspect, will go past that

and it does. 9 for Nicky Morgan. Very well done.

APPLAUSE

Great answer, George. Secretary of State for Education, Nicky Morgan.

-And has not nicked my glasses, so fair play to her.

-Not yet.

-At time of recording.

-Exactly. Thank you very much indeed.

-Now, Julie.

-Not a great subject for me, I'm afraid.

-Um, I'm going to try William Hague.

-William Hague, says Julie.

Let's see if that's right

and how many of our 100 people said William Hague.

Oh, I'm sorry, Julie.

Not after the election, I'm afraid. William Hague is wrong,

scores you 100 points.

He stepped down to spend more time...making money, I think.

-I think so.

-I think that was his official explanation.

-Making money and judo, I think.

-Making money and practising judo.

Thank you very much indeed. We're halfway through the round.

Let's look at those scores.

Bob and George, once again, lovely low-scoring from you.

Lovely low score of 9.

24 is where we find Aleisha and Tim

and 100, I'm sorry, Julie and Sonia. That is a high score.

All I can say is very, very good luck.

Maybe a minus score from you would help.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

Sonia, we're looking for any MP or peer appointed to the cabinet

after the 2015 general election.

Priti Patel.

Priti Patel, says Sonia. Priti Patel.

No red line for you, as you're the high-scorers.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Priti Patel.

That's a very good answer, Sonia.

9 is the lowest score we've had so far. You pass it.

Down to 2. Very well done indeed.

APPLAUSE Lowest score of the round.

Takes your total up to 102.

Very well played, Sonia. Kept yourself in it there.

She's a minister at the Department of Work and Pensions, Priti Patel,

but also attends cabinet.

-Thank you very much, Richard. Now then, Bob.

-Oh, dear.

-Oh, dear.

-If you can score 92 or less, Bob...

-92 or less, OK.

-Yeah.

George Osborne.

George Osborne, says Bob. Here's your red line.

Let's see if you can get below... I think you probably will.

-Well, hope so.

-Let's see how many of our 100 people said George Osborne.

Yep, you've done it.

Oh.

Oh, 42. You've done it by some margin there.

APPLAUSE 51 is your total.

Yeah, he's the... George Osborne is the Chancellor of the Exchequer.

That reminds me of that time when you see a Tube with the doors open

and you just... HE PANTS

You rush to get in there, you sit down in the seat

-and the doors stay open for about five more minutes.

-Exactly.

LAUGHTER Anyway, there we go. Tim.

-Tim.

-OK, I'm going to go for Michael Fallon.

Michael Fallon, says Tim.

Let's see how many people said Michael Fallon.

Here's your red line.

It's right.

Gets you through.

Good answer. 3.

APPLAUSE Takes your total up to 27,

lowest total of the round.

Well played, Tim. Secretary of State for Defence.

Let's look at the pointless answers.

There's quite a few of them, as you might imagine.

Anna Soubry works in the Business Department.

Baroness Anelay of St Johns,

who's in the Foreign and Commonwealth Office.

Elizabeth Truss, Liz Truss,

who is Secretary of State for the Environment.

Greg Hands is Chief Secretary to the Treasury.

Jeremy Wright is the Attorney General.

John Whittingdale, who we have to be very nice to,

cos he's the Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport,

-and he's in charge of the BBC and what's going to happen to it.

-Yeah.

Patrick McLoughlin is Secretary of State for Transport.

Robert Halfon, minister without portfolio,

and Stephen Crabb, Secretary of State for Wales.

You also could have had Matthew Hancock, Paymaster General.

Well done if you said any of those. Let's look at the top three answers,

the ones that most of our 100 people said.

-David Cameron, 44.

-Really?

You've got question our 100 people there, haven't you?

LAUGHTER Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So, at the end of our second round, the pair heading home...

Now, I heard some outpourings of grief

-from the far podium during that.

-Yeah.

-Stephen Crabb is...

-Is from Haverfordwest.

-Is your MP.

LAUGHTER

-Oh, well, nevermind.

-He's from our town.

Listen, we will see you again next time, Sonia and Julie,

when I'm sure you'll go much, much further.

Thank you very much for playing. Sonia and Julie, everyone.

APPLAUSE

For the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Very, very well done, Bob and George, Tim and Aleisha.

You're now one step closer to the final

and a chance to play for our jackpot,

which currently stands at £1,000.

There it is. From here on in, you can start conferring.

First pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

Really very, very strong from both pairs on both shows,

so I'm looking forward to seeing the outcome of this.

It's going to be very close either way. Best of luck to both pairs.

Let's play this head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Here comes your first question and it concerns...

Welsh Towns And Cities, Richard.

Going to show you five pictures of Welsh towns and cities.

You just need to identify the most obscure of these five, please.

Thanks very much indeed.

Let's reveal our five Welsh towns and cities.

There we are. Five Welsh towns and cities.

Bob and George, you're our low-scorers, so you'll go first.

INAUDIBLE DISCUSSION

-We're going for E, aren't we?

-We're going for E.

Hay-on-Wye.

Hay-on-Wye, say Bob and George. Hay-on-Wye.

Tim and Aleisha, do you feel like talking us

-through the rest of that board?

-We think A is Swansea,

-D, Cardiff. Um...

-B is Wrexham.

But I think we're going to say C, Carmarthen.

-C, Carnarvon.

-Carmarthen.

Carmarthen. I beg your pardon.

So, Bob and George have gone for Hay-on-Wye for E.

Let's see if that's right and how many people say Hay-on-Wye.

It is Hay-on-Wye.

APPLAUSE

Meanwhile, Tim and Aleisha have gone for Carmarthen.

Let's see if that's right for C

and if it is, how many of our 100 people said Carmarthen?

I'm afraid it's not Carmarthen, which means, Bob and George,

-well done. After one question, you are up 1-0.

-Well played.

It does fit the letters, Carmarthen,

-but that is...

-Carnarvon.

-Caerphilly.

-Oh, Caerphilly.

-Caerphilly.

Not Carnarvon, not Carmarthen, Caerphilly.

Would have scored you 12 points. Swansea would have scored you 45.

Only scored 45 points.

B, you knew it was Wrexham, and it would have won you the point

if you'd said it as well.

It scored 23. And Cardiff, the biggest scorer of all.

They won't like that in Swansea. Would have scored 71.

Thank you, Richard. Here comes your second question.

Tim and Aleisha, you get to answer first but you have to win it

to stay in the game, so good luck. It concerns...

Coronation Street Stars, Richard.

Going to give you five clues to facts about people

who have appeared in Coronation Street at one time or another.

Can you give us the most obscure answer, please?

Let's reveal our five clues and here they come.

I'll read those one last time.

Tim and Aleisha will go first.

INAUDIBLE DISCUSSION

We're going to go for the top one. Patrick Stewart.

Patrick Stewart, say Tim and Aleisha.

Now, Bob and George,

how many of those do you feel like filling in for us?

Well, my hunch is that the Bolton-born comedian

is either Peter Kay or Paddy McGuinness

and the former Family Fortunes presenter,

this is a gamble, but I'm going to say Les Dennis.

Les Dennis. Les Dennis. We have Patrick Stewart and Les Dennis.

Tim and Aleisha have gone for Patrick Stewart.

Let's see if that's right for the former Star Trek and X-Men actor.

It is right.

APPLAUSE

Very well done. 25 for Patrick Stewart.

Bob and George, meanwhile, have gone for Les Dennis,

the former Family Fortunes presenter.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Les Dennis, if it's right.

It is right.

It's got to beat...

Ooh, 54. 54 for Les Dennis.

APPLAUSE

Well done, Tim and Aleisha, you're back in the game.

-After two questions, it's 1-1.

-Les Dennis, biggest scorer up there.

A couple of answers there would have won you the point.

Peter Kay wouldn't have won it cos he would have scored you 34.

Is the darts champion Eric Bristow or Phil Taylor?

-Well, by and large, we won't accept two answers.

-No, no.

That was the debate but we said... Dad said Eric Bristow.

-Dad, you're saying Eric Bristow.

-I am.

-I'm saying Phil Taylor.

Bob, as always, if you'd listened to your son,

you'd be in the final, cos it was Phil "The Power" Taylor.

Would have scored you 11 points. Would have been a terrific answer.

-And the Fawlty Towers actress is...

-Prunella Scales.

-Prunella Scales.

-That would have scored you 22.

-Thank you very much, Richard.

Here comes your third and final question. Whoever wins this one

goes through to the final.

Best of luck to both pairs. It concerns...

Grand National Winners, Richard.

We're going to show you five names of horses

that have won the Grand National but we've put them in anagram form.

Can you unscramble them to play in today's final?

-Best of luck, both teams.

-Thanks, Richard.

Let's reveal our five anagrams. Here they come.

Bob and George will go first this time.

INAUDIBLE DISCUSSION

-'67 is Foinavon.

-Foinavon.

OK. Foinavon, say Bob and George.

Now, Tim and Aleisha, do you want to talk through the board?

The obvious one is right in the middle, Red Rum,

but I think that's going to score a lot higher, so...

-But that's the only one we know. Just say Red Rum?

-Yeah, OK, Red Rum.

You're going for Red Rum. So, Bob and George went for Foinavon.

Let's see if that's right and if it is,

how many of our 100 people got that?

It's right.

4 for Foinavon.

APPLAUSE

Now, Tim and Aleisha, meanwhile, have gone for Red Rum. "Murder".

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 said Red Rum?

It's right.

82 for Red Rum.

APPLAUSE

Very well done, Bob and George.

After three questions, you're through to the final, 2-1.

Foinavon actually the lowest score on the board, I'm very surprised.

Foinavon was the horse that famously won at 100 to 1.

Virtually all the rest of the field fell at the 23rd fence,

which is now called Foinavon. A Tail Din?

-Aldaniti.

-Aldaniti. That would have scored you 21. Liars Copy Pitt.

The bookies lost a fortune on this cos it was a few days

-before the general election in 1992.

-It's Party Politics.

Party Politics, so a lot of people put a lot of money on it.

Would have scored you 8. And Rice Bore?

-Corbiere.

-Corbiere, Jenny Pitman's horse. Would have scored you 10.

Thank you very much indeed.

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

I'm sorry, Tim and Aleisha, it was you.

But still, as I predicted, very, very close.

I knew that would go to three questions.

It's been brilliant having you on both shows.

I'm sorry you didn't make it to the final,

but it's been wonderful to have you here. Thanks for playing so well.

-Tim and Aleisha.

-Thank you.

-Thank you. Well done, guys.

But for Bob and George, it's now time for our Pointless final.

APPLAUSE

Very, very well done, Bob and George.

You've seen off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy, so well done.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

and at the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £1,000.

Well, we have thrown all sorts of things at you.

We started off, didn't we, with often confused words,

then we had cabinet members, Welsh towns and cities,

then we had Coronation Street

and then we had Grand National winners and here you are.

As always, you get to choose your category

from the four things we put up on the board.

Let's hope there's something you like the look of.

Today's selection looks like this.

I couldn't help you with Crime Writers.

I could, perhaps, help you with Radio 4 Programmes

-but how much do you listen to Radio 4?

-Yeah, I do listen to Radio 4.

-You listen to Radio 4.

-It's the only option, I'm afraid.

I think it is the only option. Radio 4 Programmes.

-Radio 4 Programmes it is, Richard.

-Very best of luck, gents.

Three very different questions here.

We are looking for... any cast member of The Archers

who has the surname Archer, in March, 2015, please.

So, anyone listed on the website with the surname Archer, 2015.

In case you have a marine seismologist on your team,

we're looking for any single-word shipping forecast areas.

Or we are looking for any of the eight most popular composers

ever chosen on Desert Island Discs. They did that poll in 2011.

The eight most chosen composers.

So, people with the surname Archer in March, 2015,

single-word shipping forecast areas

and most popular Desert Island Disc composers. Very best of luck.

-Thank you.

-Thank you. As always, you've got up to one minute

to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that jackpot of £1,000

is for just one of those answers to be pointless. Are you ready?

-Yes.

-I'm ready.

-OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

Your time starts now.

-Out of those, the shipping forecast is...

-Yes, shipping forecast.

-Forget about the other two.

-Forget about the others. Cromarty?

Cromarty, Finisterre. Bailey is a good one. Um...

South Utsire, North Utsire. Um...

-Wight, Dogger...

-I'm going...

-Shh. Wight, Dogger. I'm thinking.

-You're thinking.

-Wight, Dogger...

Um...

-Is there one at Peterhead?

-No.

-Um, Wick?

-No.

-Lerwick?

-No.

Um, there's Iceland, goes up, goes down...

There's Portland... Fastnet.

You've named enough, it's which ones you're most confident.

-Ten seconds left.

-OK, we'll definitely go Bailey.

-Bailey.

I'd say Cromarty, but I think it's popular.

-And it's got to be a single word.

-Yeah.

-One word.

-Wight?

OK, that's your time up. Let's have your three answers.

-We'll go with Bailey.

-Bailey.

-Wight.

-Wight.

-And Fastnet.

-And Fastnet.

And all of those, obviously...

-Are shipping forecast areas.

-Single-word shipping forecast areas.

Of those three, which do you think is your best shot...?

-Best shot's Bailey.

-Bailey goes last. Least likely to be pointless?

-Fastnet.

-OK, and Wight goes in the middle.

Let's pop those up on the board in that order, then, and here they are.

We've got...

Very, very best of luck.

Let's say one of these wins you the jackpot.

What would you spend it on, Bob?

I'd like to buy a new set of golf clubs.

I had a little swing the other day and I'm getting back into it.

But I've got a daughter who's spent it about three times already.

She's at Edinburgh University,

so she's skint and I think she wanted a share.

And I won't let you get the golf clubs

cos there won't be much remaining if you do buy the golf clubs,

but concert tickets is how I would spend the money,

so I'd be at the Royal Albert Hall a lot.

We're going to see Bob Dylan there in October,

so perhaps we can visit there a bit more often.

Very good indeed. Best of luck.

Let's hope at least one of these brilliant answers

wins you that jackpot.

Fastnet was the one you thought was least likely to be pointless.

Only one of them has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot.

Let's find out. Fastnet, for £1,000, how many people said it?

-It's right.

-Oh, it IS right.

Should have had more confidence.

If Fastnet takes us all the way down to zero,

you will leave immediately with £1,000.

Down it goes into single figures. Still going down...

Oh, 1! AUDIENCE GROANS

There we go.

APPLAUSE

1 for Fastnet.

That's a fantastic answer. Very good low score there.

Sadly, though, we're only interested

in pointless answers at this stage of the game.

So, you have two more shots at today's jackpot.

Your next answer was Wight.

Once again, we were looking for single-word shipping forecast areas.

To win the jackpot, it has to be pointless.

For £1,000, let's see how many people said Wight.

It, too, is right.

Fastnet took us all the way down to 1.

Wight now taking us down through the 20s

and the teens into single figures.

Still going down, still going down...

3. AUDIENCE GROANS

APPLAUSE

-One more chance.

-Still, either way, a very, very good score there.

Fantastic score. Bailey is your third and final answer.

This is the one you thought was your best shot at a pointless answer.

It has to be pointless.

Let's find out, for £1,000, how many people said Bailey.

It's right. We've come very, very close twice now.

Fastnet took us down to 1, Wight took us all the way down to 3.

Bailey now going into single figures. Down it goes, passes 3...

-Yes!

-Yes!

-Yes!

Fantastic!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE DROWN SPEECH

-Very well done indeed.

-Thank you.

Ah, congratulations!

Bailey was a pointless answer.

Which means you go home with that jackpot of £1,000.

Very well done.

You will be at the Albert Hall, I hope, a lot, on the back of that.

-Absolutely.

-And maybe get some nice golf clubs too.

-Richard.

Bob and George, absolutely fantastic.

Thank you so much for being with us for two shows.

You've been brilliant, and what a lovely way to finish it,

with the third answer as well,

Bob, I can't tell you - perfect, absolutely perfect!

Let's look at the other answers.

Let's look at the Archer family first.

There's only two pointless answers.

You'd have got 1 point at home for Henry, Kenton, Helen or Tom.

2 points for Josh Archer. Those were the real low-scorers there.

Now, the shipping forecast areas. There's four pointless answers.

Now, the Desert Island Disc composers.

Again, there's only two pointless answers here.

The other answers there were Beethoven, Mozart, Bach,

Tchaikovsky, Edward Elgar and Franz Schubert.

Gents, you've been fantastic for two shows

-and congratulations on winning that jackpot.

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

Thanks, Richard, and thanks again to our winning players,

Bob and George, who go away with today's jackpot of £1,000.

Very well done.

APPLAUSE

Join us next time,

when we'll be putting more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE