Episode 34 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed.

I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

the game where we aim for the obscure and we ignore the obvious.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

Hello, I'm Sue and this is my friend Pauline

and we are from Milton Keynes.

Couple number two.

Hello, I'm Zack and this is my friend Luke

and we're from Canterbury in Kent.

Couple number three.

Hello, I'm Jim, I'm from Sheffield.

This is my mum, Rose, she's from Leek in Staffordshire.

And finally, couple number four.

Hi, I'm Nathan and this is my workmate Jay.

I'm from West Brom and he's from Birmingham.

And these are today's contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thanks very much all of you.

Welcome to Pointless.

We'll find out more about each of you as the show goes along.

That just leaves one more person to introduce.

A real telly mover and shaker, he's best mates with the banker

from Deal Or No Deal and once snogged Dusty Bin.

It's my pointless friend, it's Richard!

Hiya.

Hi, everybody. Hello.

-Good afternoon to you, sir.

-Good afternoon.

-What are we going to do about this jackpot?

-I, I don't know.

We cannot give it away. We can't give it away.

-Sometimes, we had seven wins in a row, recently.

-I know!

Haven't had a win for a very, very long time.

Makes it exciting, though. Three returning pairs from that last show.

Luke and Zack did the best of our three returning pairs,

got through to the head-to-head.

Seemed very unfair. Sue and Pauline are our only newcomers

-and they're on the first podium.

-I know.

-That doesn't seem right.

-No.

And poor old Jim who comes from Sheffield

got knocked out in Round One and Round Two was People From Sheffield.

In fact, Jim was our lowest-scoring answer.

You were a very low-scoring answer.

But, yeah, lovely jackpot, someone at some point is going to grab it.

Could it be somebody today?

That would be exciting.

Well, Katherine and Laura didn't win the jackpot last time

so we add another £1,000 to that.

So, today's jackpot starts off at £11,000.

APPLAUSE

If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

All you have to remember is this.

The pair with the highest score at the end of all each round

will be eliminated. Best of luck to all four pairs.

Our first category this afternoon is Artists.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

An artist in haiku, Richard?

Only cos we've got an £11,000 jackpot,

-I thought I would go well highbrow.

-Good, well...

-Well highbrow.

We're going to give you seven descriptions of artists

on each board now, but we've done them in the form of haiku poems -

that's five syllables, seven syllables, five syllables.

Don't panic, you'll know who some of them are, I promise you.

Can you tell us the most obscure one of them, please?

Going to be 14 in all to have a go at home, so very best of luck.

So, let's reveal our first board of seven haikus and here they are.

There we are, seven lovely concise little Haikus,

I'm going to read them all one last time.

-There we are. Sue, a warm welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you very much.

-From Milton Keynes?

-From Milton Keynes.

-What do you do, Sue?

-I'm a retired primary headteacher.

-When did you retire?

-Four years ago.

-Four years ago. Now, do you miss it terribly?

-No, not at all.

-Not without a second's hesitation.

Erm, and what have you taken up? What do you do with your...?

I mostly look after my grandson, which is why I retired.

-Fair enough.

-And I do my garden and look after my chickens.

-How many chickens have you got?

-Six.

-Six. We've had five little chicks.

-Oh!

-Very exciting. Actually five and another hen's become broody.

I don't know what we're going to do. That's going to be too many.

-That's too many.

-Yeah, anyway...

Kill the cockerel I think is the answer.

AUDIENCE LAUGH

-Sorry.

-No, I suppose, yes...

-There are times.

-Well, we'll see.

I'm not sure it's come to that quite yet. But kill...

This was the show with kill the cockerel!

-I must admit, you must have been quite a teacher.

-Yeah! There we go.

Now, Sue.

Which of these haikus? See, it's not so bad, is it?

No, it's very easy.

I think I'll go for the last one and that's Botticelli.

Botticelli, says Sue.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Botticelli.

It's right.

-Botticelli, very well done indeed!

-That's all right.

15 for Botticelli.

Yeah, one of the greatest painters of the Florentine Renaissance.

And yet I can't hear his name

without hearing it in Rik Mayall's voice.

Yes, famously was part of a Young Ones script.

He was. He was indeed.

Thanks very much, Richard.

-Luke, welcome back.

-Thanks.

-Welcome back.

Yes, I just remembered, we had you in the head-to-head last time

and Brian Blessed was what tripped you up.

I don't know much about Brian Blessed.

I didn't know anything about him

but Zack knew one thing but it wasn't the right thing to know.

It wasn't the right thing to know.

Anyway, Luke, remind us about yourself.

So, I'm from south London, Raynes Park,

but we go to university in Canterbury.

Yeah, I'm an English literature student and I enjoy playing music.

I play drums in my free time.

-And I'm a Fulham fan as well, avid Fulham fan.

-Oh, I didn't know that.

-Yeah.

-Are you? Yeah.

-Avid Fulham fan!

Luke, what would you like to go for here?

I only know a couple

and they're probably going to be the highest scorers.

I think I'm just going to have to go for the Turner nominee,

Unmade Bed one, Tracey Emin.

Tracey Emin, says Luke.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Tracey Emin?

36.

Not terrible by any means.

Very good answer, well done.

Tracey Emin...stands the test of time as well.

As years go by, she gets more and more impressive, I think.

Hmm, yeah, thank you. Now, Jim. Welcome back.

Remind us what you do, Jim.

I work at Leeds University.

I'm doing my PhD as well in my spare time.

Oh, so you're doing your PhD there but you're also in charge of ethics?

I am also in charge of ethics.

You're in charge of ethics,

-just making sure that the student body are good people.

-Sort of.

You are the moral compass for them all. Now, Jim.

What would you like to go for on our board of haikus?

I'm slightly in two minds.

I think I know them all

but I'm going to go for one that's slightly riskier.

The second one I think is Vermeer.

Vermeer, says Jim. Gets a nod from your mum.

Let's see if it's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said Vermeer.

Very good indeed, Jim.

Answering like that should get you

into the next round, I think.

-8 for Vermeer.

-Well played, Tim, Johannes Vermeer.

Considered one of the really great Dutch masters.

Only 35 or so works of his exist.

So, if you've got one, it's worth a few bob.

If you've got one, go on Flog It!

-AUDIENCE LAUGH

-That'd be my advice.

Hmm, thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Now then, Jay.

-Welcome back.

-Thank you.

-Jay, remind us what you do.

I'm the president of a student's union at Newman University.

So, what really fills your time?

Well, we're elected to be the student voice

for the student body at the university.

So, doing any campaigns they want us to do,

many events they want us to put on.

And just anything, really, being there for their welfare as well.

Interesting. What are you going to do with this board?

-It's all yours.

-Erm, change it?

Yeah! OK. HE LAUGHS

No, art has never been one of my strongest subjects.

I'm sorry, Nathan. So, I'm just going to have a complete guess.

You're going to know some of these, though?

Well, the two I did know have gone.

And the only other one I can think of is Vincent Van Gogh.

I'm going to say that for the Norwegian artist

known for Frieze Of Life.

OK, Van Gough or a Van Go, says Jay.

Let's see how many of our 100 people went with Van Gogh.

I'm afraid not, Jay.

I want to go argh! But I...

-I won't.

-So do I.

That scores you 100 points, Jay.

Let's take a look at all of these.

-Born in Manchester.

-That'd be Lowry. TS Lowry.

-That would have scored you 58 points.

-LS, I beg your pardon.

-The Norwegian artist?

-Munch.

-Edvard Munch.

Would have scored you 18.

The Cubism master?

-Picasso.

-Pablo Picasso, 27.

You've heard of Picasso, Jay?

-Yep.

-THEY LAUGH

-And Edvard Munch!

-And the French impressionist?

-Is Monet.

-Yeah, Claude Monet. And that would have scored you 43.

-It's all about the Monet.

-There we are, yes, indeed.

Thank you, Richard. Halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. 8, well done, Jim.

Jim and Rose looking very strong at this point.

Then up to 15, where we find Sue and Pauline.

Up to Luke and Zack on 36.

And then Jay and Nathan, I'm sorry. 100 there.

-Is it the haikus or is it the art?

-Probably the art, to be fair.

-Probably the art. Now, Nathan, how is your art?

-Terrible.

We'll just go now, if you want.

OK, we'll come back down the line,

can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, we're going to put seven more haikus up on the board

and here they are.

We have got...

I will read all of those one last time.

There we are. Nathan?

Now, let's just ignore the haikus for now, Nathan.

-Remind us what you get up to.

-I work with James at the students union.

I'm the vice president, he's the president.

I'm just guessing this just from you and Jay,

I imagine you have quite a lot of fun, don't you?

-Yeah.

-Do you get a lot of work done in that office?

-Yeah.

-THEY LAUGH

And what do you like getting up to when you're out of the office?

I love football. I'm a massive West Bromwich Albion fan.

-No? No-one else? OK.

-HE LAUGHS

And I do run a Sunday team with my friend Matty as well.

OK, there we are. Now Nathan, you're on 100.

-You're the high scorers by quite a long way.

-Yeah.

-Do you think you can find a low score on the board?

-Nope.

Er, I think I can...

I know probably a couple more painters than James.

I'm going to go with the top one and go Leonardo da Vinci.

Leonardo da Vinci, the Renaissance master. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see if our 100 people said it.

No red line for you as you are the high scorers.

See you later.

I'm afraid not, Nathan,

that scores 100 points,

-takes your total up to 200.

-OK.

-Sorry, I'll give the correct answer to that at the end of the pass.

-OK.

Thank you very much indeed. Now, Rose. Rose, welcome back.

-Remind us what you do, Rose.

-I'm a retired teacher.

Very good, and what do you like getting up to, Rose?

I like walking and any kind of exercise, really.

-Going to the gym and yoga, spinning.

-Good stuff.

And what would you like to go for, Rose?

I think I'll play safe. The top one, Michelangelo.

Michelangelo, let's see how many of our 100 people said that?

No red line.

It's right.

48.

Takes your total up to 56.

Yeah, buried in the same place as Galileo and Machiavelli.

-Quite cool, isn't it?

-Yeah.

Painted the Sistine Chapel ceiling

but his spare room ceiling, still not done.

-Still not and he promised to have it done.

-Yeah.

The paint's in the garage and he still hasn't done it.

Thank you, Richard. Now Zack, Zack.

Welcome back, Zack.

Remind us what you do, Zack.

I'm a student at Canterbury Christ Church University,

specialise in a television, radio and film.

Television, radio and film. You go out and do camera stuff as well?

I've done a few practical bits and pieces.

You know, bit of editing, bit of camera work, floor managing.

Fantastic. Now then, Zack.

There you are on 36, doesn't matter what you score.

You are through to the next round. What would you like to go for?

I know one and it hasn't been taken yet, I'm very happy.

The leading pop artist famous for paintings and prints

like Campbell's soup cans -

actually I'm not too sure now but I'll go with it.

-Andy Warhol.

-Andy Warhol, says Zack.

No red line for you, you're already through.

Let's see how many people said Andy Warhol.

The we are, good answer.

36 is what it scores you.

You equal Luke's score,

it takes your total up to 72.

Yeah, safe and sound, Zack.

-Also was of course a film-maker, Andy Warhol.

-Indeed. Thank you.

-Now, Pauline.

-Hello.

-Pauline, welcome to the show.

-What do you do, Pauline?

-I'm also a retired teacher.

-Were you at the same school as Sue?

-Yes.

-I see.

Did you know each other before teaching there

or that was when you became friends?

-We became friends at the school.

-And when did you retire?

-About seven years ago.

-And enjoying it?

-Not missing the teaching at all?

-I'm loving my retirement.

-Lovely.

Now, Pauline, what would you like to get up to?

Well, I also look after my grandchildren

and I like walking the dog and I love knitting.

Excellent. What's your most ambitious knitting project so far?

The best thing I've knitted so far

I think is a jumper for my daughter with owls over it.

Even without the owls, that was impressive.

-Knitting a jumper, that's quite an undertaking, isn't it?

-It is.

Wonderful. Now then, Pauline, it doesn't matter what you score,

you're through to the next round, which is great news.

Why not talk us through this board? See if you can answer some of these.

I don't think I can talk you through the board

but the English Romantic known for Dedham Vale landscapes

was John Constable.

Constable, says Pauline.

No red line, you're already through.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Constable.

It's right.

Good answer, 25, takes your total

up to a nice round 40.

-The lowest score of the round, I might add.

-Gosh!

Well played, Pauline.

In 2013, the Tate purchased one of his paintings,

Salisbury Cathedral From The Meadows, for £23.1 million.

-It's not bad going, isn't it?

-Not bad at all.

Let's fill in the rest of these. Do you know the Mexican painter?

-Frida Kahlo?

-Frida Kahlo would have scored you 6.

-The Yorkshireman?

-David Hockney.

David Hockney would have scored you 17. The YBA member?

-Damien Hirst.

-Damien Hirst would have scored you 35.

And the Frenchman at the bottom there?

-That one I would have to take a bit of a guess on.

-If you had to guess?

-I'll tell you what.

-Go on.

The painting, the most expensive painting ever

was of two Tahitian women.

Ah, yes, we do know him.

Erm, Gauguin.

Paul Gauguin, absolutely right.

Would have scored you 3 points, best answer on the board.

-Sold that for nearly £200 million.

-You see, there we are.

Those doodles you do, by the way, during the rounds,

I think are very good, Richard.

Thank you, I do sell some of them.

But I've yet to get over seven or eight million

for any individual doodle.

Thank you very much. Well, we are at the end of our first round.

And I'm sorry to say, Nathan and Jay,

I'm afraid you have been outperformed

by your fellow contestants.

So I'm afraid we have to say goodbye to you.

Been great having you on both shows. Nathan and Jay!

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Very well done, everybody. We are through to Round Two.

I tell you, with this huge jackpot looming like that,

everything's so charged.

It's like one of those days when there's a thunderstorm brewing.

One of you three pairs could be going through to the final

and playing for £11,000.

That's just a terrifying thought, isn't it?

Best of luck to all three pairs,

our category for Round Two today is...

OK, can you all decide in your pairs,

who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

Let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name...

...as they could.

Football clubs beginning with A, B, C or D, Richard?

Looking for the name of any English football league club

in the top four divisions in the 2014/15 season

whose names begin A, B, C or D, please.

-Very best of luck.

-OK, now this is quite fun.

Says I, because I don't have to play it. But you know, it is, it's fun.

-Pauline?

-I'm going to try Coventry City.

-Coventry City, says Pauline.

Let's see how made of our 100 people said Coventry City.

It is right, Pauline.

Look at that, 10 for Coventry City!

Very well done indeed.

Well played, Pauline.

They started out in life as Singers FC, which begins with S

so we wouldn't have allowed it.

In Victorian Pointless, they would have been an incorrect answer.

Victorian Pointless, what they used to do,

-they would fill this with water.

-Yes.

And then two gentleman with massive sideburns would control,

one watching and the other one with a tap at the bottom.

And they would let it out, it was much slower in those days.

But I tell you what, Brucey did a very good job of hosting it.

He did, he did. AUDIENCE LAUGH

Thanks very much indeed. Now, Zack.

What would you like to go for?

So much choice.

I'm going to go with Colchester United.

Colchester United.

Colchester United, let's see if it's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It is right.

Well, 10 was what we got for Coventry.

Colchester leaves Coventry in its wake.

There we are.

This is very good, Zack.

Very good indeed.

Founded in 1873 is Colchester Town.

Nicknamed the Oysters for reasons I don't know.

Not far from the coast, I suppose.

Colchester natives are delicious. Mm.

I mean, the oysters.

Ah! Phew.

Yeah, now then, Rose.

Not my subject, this.

Erm, Blackburn Rovers.

Blackburn Rovers, says Rose.

Let's see if it's right, let's see how many of our

100 people said Blackburn Rovers.

Well, 10 and 7 are our only scores

at this point.

Ow! Rose, I'm sorry!

23 for Blackburn Rovers. That's a nice score.

Yeah, memorably won the Premier League title in '94/'95.

One of only three clubs who were a founder member of the Premier League

and of the original Football League as well.

-Oh, that's nice. Nice of them to stick around.

-Isn't it?

-Yes.

Halfway through the round

so let's take a look at those scores. 7, well done, Zack.

Zack and Luke looking very strong at this point on 7.

Up to 10, Pauline and Sue, well done.

Then Jim and Rose, you're on 23.

You'll have to define a nice low score on the next pass, Jim,

so good luck with that.

We're going to come back down the line now,

can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, Jim, remember,

we're looking for football clubs whose names start with A, B, C or D.

OK, not my subject either.

I'm going to slightly risky,

I don't know whether they are in the league.

Crewe Alexandra.

Crewe Alexandra, says Jim, Crewe Alexandra.

Let's see if that's right, how many of our 100 people said it.

No red line for you as you're the high scorers.

It's right.

That's a good score!

Look at that, Crewe Alexandra

scores you 5.

Takes your total up to 28, that could be enough.

-You never know, Jim.

-It's a very good answer, yes.

Funnily enough, finished one place below Colchester United

in the season we're talking about.

-They took their name from Princess Alexandra.

-Ah.

The Alexandra bit, not the Crewe bit. They took that from Crewe.

Right, OK. Yes, thank you very much. Now, Luke.

-20 or less is what we require from you.

-OK, I've got a couple.

I think I'm going to go for Accrington Stanley.

Accrington Stanley.

There's your red line, get below that,

you're into the head-to-head for the second time.

Let's see how many people said Accrington Stanley.

It's right.

Very well done, you're through.

Look at that, 20!

You needed 20, you got 20.

-There we are, 27 is your total.

-That was close, yes.

Such a well-known name in English football, Accrington Stanley.

Never achieved a huge amount but went out of the league

and they were famously on a milk advert as well,

which is why most people remember their names.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. Now, Sue, we come to you.

Brilliant low score from Pauline in the first pass.

If you can score 17 or less...

-No.

-Well, let's wait and see.

The only one I can think of is Derby County.

-So, that is the one you're going to go for.

-That's my answer.

Here's your red line, if you can get below this red line,

you are into the head-to-head.

Good luck, how many people said it?

It's right.

-Ooh! 18!

-Oh!

18, which puts your score on 28.

Hold on, let me ring the monks.

-You ring the monks.

-We're in a lockdown situation.

This means we have achieved lockdown.

We have achieved lockdown. That noise you can hear

is the air locks on the doors of the studio being closed.

No-one is allowed to get out, no-one is allowed to come in,

unless they are a bunch of Benedictine monks.

Just so you know, we have three minutes of oxygen left,

three minutes of oxygen left.

-This is an amber warning.

-OK.

The monks are on their way.

I'm going to go ahead with the tie-break question.

-They are currently in San Sebastian in Spain.

-OK.

I'm hoping they make it here before the oxygen is depleted.

Runs out, OK, we've got about two and a half minutes of oxygen left?

We have now got...

Well, I said three minutes and that was 40 seconds ago.

-2.20, something like that.

-I'm just stocking up now.

HE GULPS OK, now.

As it's a tie, the tied pairs have to give me one more answer each.

You can confer and we will go to Sue and Pauline first.

# Ooh!

-BOTH:

-# Oh, lockdown, psch! Dum, dum, psch!

# Ooh, oh, lockdown, psch! Dum, dum, psch! #

-OK, Sue and Pauline, what would you like to go for?

-Doncaster Rovers.

Doncaster Rovers.

Jim and Rose, Doncaster Rovers is what they're going to go for.

What would you like to go for?

-We're going to go for Bolton Wanderers.

-Bolton Wanderers.

Doncaster Rovers, Bolton Wanderers, in the order they were given.

Sue and Pauline went for Doncaster Rovers.

Let's see if it's right, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

-25.

-Oh, that's quite a lot.

25 for Doncaster Rovers, taking your total up to 53.

Now, Jim and Rose have gone for Bolton Wanderers.

Your target is 24, Jim and Rose.

That's what it looks like on the board there, that red line.

You have gone for Bolton Wanderers, let's see if it's right,

how many of our 100 people said Bolton Wanderers.

It's right.

Ooh!

Oh, I'm sorry.

37 is your total there.

37's your score there,

65 is your total.

I'm sorry, Jim and Rose.

Doncaster Rovers, 25. Bolton Wanderers, 37.

That is a game and a half, isn't it?

We had some really good answers during the round,

there's no pointless answers at all.

I'm going to give you the lowest scores.

1 point, best possible answer you could have gone for, Burton Albion.

Well done if you said that.

2 points for Crawley Town, 4 points for Cheltenham town,

the best three answers you could have gone for.

7 points for Bury, 8 for Chesterfield and Cambridge United.

12 for Carlisle and Barnsley.

15 for Blackpool and Bournemouth.

16 for Crystal Palace and Charlton Athletic.

19 for Brighton and Hove Albion.

Bradford City and Bristol City both got 22.

Birmingham City, 37. And here's the top three answers

most of our 100 people gave when we asked them online.

SOME CHEERING

Some Arsenal fans in, as there always are.

There we are, thanks very much, Richard.

So, we are at the end of our second round.

I'm sorry to say the pair who are heading home

with their high score of 65, Jim and Rose.

Well, what can I say?

That was a historic second round there,

particularly the charge of that £11,000 jackpot hanging over us.

But I'm sorry, this is where we say goodbye to you.

Much better to see you for another round than we did last time.

But thanks so much for playing, Jim and Rose.

But for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

Well, congratulations, Sue and Pauline, Luke and Zack.

You're now one step closer to the final and a chance to play for

that jackpot, which, let's not forget,

is still standing at £11,000.

Well, from here on in, you can start playing as teams, great news.

First player to win two questions in this round

will be playing for that jackpot.

I think this is going to be very closely matched

but very exciting indeed.

Best of luck to both pairs, let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here's your first question, and it concerns...

Famous Emmas, Richard?

On this board, we're going to show you five pictures

of famous people called Emma.

Can you tell us who they are, please?

Let's reveal our five famous Emmas and here they come.

We have got...

There we are, five famous Emmas.

Sue and Pauline, you're our low scorers so you will go first.

Emma Forbes...

I don't know any of the others. I think so.

-Go for A.

-Yes.

We think A is Emma Forbes.

-You think A is...

-Emma Forbes.

-Emma Forbes.

A, Emma Forbes.

Now then, Luke and Zack, talk us through the rest of the Emmas.

The rest of the Emmas, B is Emma Bunton,

D is Emma Thompson but we're going to go with E

and Emma Willis.

Emma Willis, say Luke and Zack. Emma Willis.

So we have Emma Forbes and we have Emma Willis.

Sue and Pauline went for Emma Forbes, let's see if that's right.

Let's see if how many people said Emma Forbes.

Emma Forbes scores you 29.

29 for Emma Forbes.

Luke and Zack meanwhile have gone for Emma Willis for E.

Lovely Emma Willis. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

It's right.

It's got to beat 29, though.

Oh, 44!

Well done, Sue and Pauline, after one question, you're up 1-0.

-Well played, we've both worked with lovely Emma Willis.

-We have.

-Isn't she nice?

-Isn't she?

-Let's look at the rest of these.

B is Emma Bunton, of course. Would have scored you 74.

We'll leave C for a moment.

D is Emma Thompson.

53. And do you know C?

I don't know who C is.

You will know the name but not the face,

she's the ceramics manufacturer.

Emma Bridgewater, is she?

And it's a pointless answer, so very well done if you said that.

There we are.

So, here comes your second question and, Luke and Zack,

you get to answer it first

but you have to win it to stay in the game, so best of luck.

It concerns...

Types of bears, Richard.

We'll show you five names of types of bear now

but we've missed out alternate letters.

Can you fill in those gaps, please?

Let's reveal our five types of bears with bits missing

and here they are. We have got...

I will read of those all again.

Luke and Zack will go first.

THEY WHISPER

Yeah, this isn't very good.

-We are going to go for the second from the bottom, polar.

-Polar.

OK, Luke and Zack say polar.

Now then, Sue and Pauline, we come to you.

Talk us through as many of those bears as you feel able.

I've got giant panda.

-The middle one is Kodiak, we think.

-Kodiak there.

Do you want to go for giant panda?

-No, Kodiak.

-Kodiak.

-Kodiak.

So, we have polar and we have Kodiak,

Luke and Zack have gone for polar.

Let's see if that's right,

how many of our 100 people spotted polar bear.

It's right. Ooh, look at that!

95 for polar.

That's a high score there.

Now, Sue and Pauline, you have to beat that with Kodiak.

Let's see if you can do it.

It's right and you're through.

Kodiak, yeah, that's a fairly comprehensive win

for Sue and Pauline.

Very well done indeed, after only two questions,

-straight through to the final, 2-0.

-Very well played, Sue and Pauline.

You know what, if there's anything cleverer than teachers,

it's retired teachers - always, they're always formidable.

Terrific performance in this head-to-head.

Those are actually the biggest two scorers on the board. The top one.

-Giant panda.

-Giant panda.

Would have scored you 9 points.

-The bottom one?

-Don't know that one.

It's the only bear in South America, it's the spectacled bear.

-Ah!

-Ah, sweet isn't it? 8 points.

Obviously karaoke bear?

Do you know what? Karaoke does fit, doesn't it? That the weird thing.

It's the surname of a film reviewer.

-Kermode!

-It's a Kermode bear.

-Ha-ha! The Kermode bear.

That would have scored you 6 points, the best answer on the board.

-Well done if you said that.

-I love the idea of it being karaoke.

A karaoke bear, I mean, that's...that's a winner.

I can see it singing It's Raining Men.

# Hallelujah... # HE GROWLS

Would be fun, wouldn't it?

HE GROWLS: # I will survive! #

AUDIENCE LAUGHS Oh, I hope it will.

Some of these bears are on the endangered species list.

And the poor old spectacled bear going, "Who's that singing?

"Is that...? Oh, it's Bill. I knew it was, I knew I knew that voice."

So, the pair leaving us at the end head-to-head round,

I'm so sorry, Luke and Zack, it is you.

I'm sorry, you've been head-to-headers twice in a row.

Really unfair and with this looming massive jackpot.

You've come so close. We say goodbye to you this time for the final time.

Been great having you on the show.

-Thank you so much for playing, Luke and Zack.

-Thank you.

You too!

But for Sue and Pauline, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Very well done, Sue and Pauline, you've seen off

all the competition and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

It's a historic jackpot.

Because at the end of today's show, it is standing at £11,000.

APPLAUSE

This I think is one of the highest jackpot we've had

in the modern game, since we amended the final round.

It's the highest.

Since we started the new endgame, it's the highest jackpot we've had.

This is very exciting.

And wonderful that we should have two ex-teachers here to play for it.

Anything you want to see come up on that board?

-You know what they're like, they're quite forbidding.

-Bears.

-Bears?

-We know quite a lot about bears.

There's just so much we don't know.

-Yes, we found out how much we don't know.

-Anything.

-OK, anything.

Well, I can assure you, something will be on the board.

In fact, there will be four somethings.

Let's see what they look like.

We've got...

-Do you know any Latin American singers?

-No.

-No, I don't either.

-Know anything about girl films?

-I was just wondering what Venus is.

What Venus?

If it's Venus Williams, that'll be no good.

-It could be Venus Williams.

-Shall we try it?

-Venus. We're going to go for Venus.

-You're going to go for Venus?

Sue and Pauline are going to go for Venus.

Yes, three questions from three completely different areas here.

Hopefully one of them suits you.

We are looking for...

the name and mission number of any NASA mission to Venus, please.

Or we are looking for anybody beaten by Venus Williams

in the Wimbledon tennis tournament between 2000 and 2015.

Or we are looking for any artist who's had a UK

top 40 single which has Venus in the title, please.

And that's up to July 2015.

So, NASA missions to Venus,

players beaten by Venus Williams between 2000 and 2015

or artists with a UK top 40 singles with Venus in the title.

Very best of luck.

OK. Now, as always, you've got up to one minute to come up with

three answers and all you need to win that jackpot of £11,000

is for just one of your answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Mm.

OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock, there they are.

Your time starts now.

-Right, you know anything about NASA missions to Venus?

-No.

Cross that one of the list.

Do you know any Wimbledon tennis players?

-We have to think of some, don't we?

-Can you think of Venus?

Who sang Venus In Blue Jeans?

-I'm trying to remember, was it Bobby Darin?

-Bobby Darin!

-Go for Bobby Darin.

-There might be others.

What about tennis players?

Venus, we need some women tennis players.

Can't think of any. Serena?

-We could say Serena Williams, couldn't we?

-If we're desperate.

-And we will be.

-Yes!

I don't think it was Bobby Darin who did Venus In Blue Jeans.

You think about that and I'll think about NASA missions.

I'm trying to think...

-I'm going to go for Justine Henin as the tennis player.

-OK, yes.

-And Venus?

-Ten seconds left.

-Go for Bobby Darin.

-We'll have to say him.

Venus?

It's only £11,000. It doesn't matter!

OK. That, I'm sorry to say, is your minute up.

But it sounds like you've got three answers.

What are you going to give me? And if you say which categories.

Right, the tennis player, we're going to go for Justine Henin.

-Justine Henin.

-And Serena?

-Serena Williams.

Serena Williams.

-And the artist Bobby Darin.

-Bobby Darin, OK.

Now of your three, which is a best shot at a pointless answer?

-Bobby Darin.

-Not the best shot.

None of them are the best shot!

-I think the lady you said would be the best.

-OK, Justine Henin.

Justine Henin goes last.

Least likely to be pointless, Serena Williams.

And then we put Bobby Darin in the middle.

OK, well, let's put those up on the board in that order then

and here they are.

Well, very best of luck.

Now before we put these to the test,

I have to ask you, just in case one of these

turns out to be a pointless answer,

what would you do with that jackpot if you were to win it?

£11,000, Sue?

My grandson, Dylan, he's five, he's a go-kart racer.

So, I think I would buy him something that he needs

to help him race his go-kart.

OK, Pauline, how about you?

Well, my brother's just come back to England to live

after spending 40 years in Canada.

So, it's wonderful to have him near us

and we'd have a holiday and get all the family together to celebrate.

Wonderful. OK, very good indeed.

Now, three good answers on the board there.

Let's hope one of them is pointless.

Your first answer was Serena Williams,

in this case we were looking for any Wimbledon tennis players

beaten by Venus Williams.

If this is pointless, it will win you £11,000.

Let's see how the people said Serena Williams.

Well, it's right.

Let's see how far down the column we get.

If it happens to go down to 0,

you will leave here with £11,000. 48.

48.

So, I'm afraid that is not a pointless answer.

You only have two more shots at today's jackpot.

Your next answer was Bobby Darin.

In this case, we were looking for any artist

who has had a UK top 40 hit with the word Venus in its title.

For £11,000, how many people said Bobby Darin? Is it pointless?

-Oh, bad luck!

-Never mind.

I'm afraid Bobby Darin is an incorrect answer.

Which means everything is now riding on your third and final answer,

the one you thought was probably your best shot

at a pointless answer.

You have gone for Justine Henin.

Once again, we are looking for Wimbledon tennis players

beaten by Venus Williams.

If this is right and if it is pointless, it will win you £11,000.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Justine Henin.

-It's right.

-Goodness.

Your first answer, Serena Williams

was a correct answer and took us down to 48.

Your second answer, Bobby Darin, was incorrect.

Justine Henin now taking us down the single figures.

Down we go. We've done it!

You have won it! Very well done indeed.

Thank you!

-That is brilliant.

-Oh!

Fantastic.

AUDIENCE CHEER

Very well done indeed.

Congratulations!

-What about that?

-Brilliant!

-Justine Henin.

Ah, tell you what, if I were a Milton Keynes...

She's always been my favourite!

If I were a Milton Keynes-based go-kart kitter,

I would be rubbing my hands right now.

Very well done indeed, that was a pointless answer,

which means you go home with our jackpot of £11,000.

Superb. THEY CHEER

Got us through the head-to-head!

Oh, brilliant research. Such a big jackpot and so well-deserved.

So glad you're walking home with it, you've been brilliant all show.

-What's the name of your grandson?

-Dylan.

He's a very lucky lad, Dylan. Congratulations, Dylan.

Let's take a look at the pointless answers in the different categories.

We'll start with NASA missions to Venus,

I know you don't care about any of this.

I understand that. NASA.

You could have had...

Also, you could have had Mariner 5 or Mariner 10.

Also could have had Galileo, Magellan or Pioneer Venus 1 and 2.

Well done if you got any of those at home.

Loads and loads of good answers on the Wimbledon one,

loads of pointless answers as well.

Take a look at a few of them.

The British player Anne Keothavong.

There's Justine Henin, just won you £11,000.

Good on her. Vera Zvonareva, also could have had.

Kim Clijsters would have been a pointless answer.

Lindsay Davenport, Lisa Raymond, Mary Pierce, Nathalie Tauziat,

Svetlana Kuznetsova, all of those were pointless answers.

For everyone apart from Serena, Maria Sharapova, Martina Hingis,

Ana Ivanovic and Marion Bartoli were pointless answers,

so well done if you said anyone else.

The artist with UK top 40 singles...

Again, like you care.

Don Pablo's Animals, who had a hit with the same song Bananarama did.

And Jo Breezer, who had a hit with Venus And Mars,

those are the only four pointless answers there.

Brilliant stuff, Justine Henin, so pleased for you.

So delighted we finally got that awful jackpot off our hands.

-Thank goodness.

-Congratulations.

Thanks very much, Richard. And thanks once again

to our winning players, Sue and Pauline, who go away with

today's jackpot of £11,000.

-Very well done. Thank you.

-Thank you! Thank you.

Join us next time

when we'll be putting more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.