Episode 36 Pointless

Thank you very much indeed.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and welcome to Pointless,

the show where we're always striving to find the most obscure answers.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

Hi, I'm Adam, this is my friend, Hal, and we're from High Wycombe.

Couple number two.

Hi, I'm Izzi, this is my dad, David, and we're from Bath.

Couple number three.

Hi, I'm Fibon, this is my friend, Luke, and we're both from Gateshead.

And finally, couple number four.

Hi, my name's Nikki, this is my mother-in-law, Dianne,

and we're from Wakefield.

And these are today's contestants.

Thanks very much, all of you. A very warm welcome to Pointless.

We'll find out more about you

throughout the show as it goes along.

So that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

Hoping not to nod off during Round Two again today,

it's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

Hiya. Hey, everybody.

I can't promise anything. I cannot promise anything.

We've got two pairs returning from the last show,

and they had very different shows.

-David and Izzi on podium two were very good.

-Mm.

-Very strong.

Got through to the head-to-head, played well, will be tough to beat.

And on podium one, Hal and Adam,

who I would say had 50% of a good show

in that Adam had a good show.

LAUGHTER Yes.

Now, Hal, gave no incorrect answers at any point,

but he gave the most obvious answers by a mile on both of his answers.

-WHISPERING: I don't think he knows the rules.

-Oh, do you not think?

No, I might just stress them a bit. When I talk through them,

I will make sure that Hal is completely accustomed.

Especially because we've got a very, very, very high octane Round One.

-I mean...

-Wow.

-..I can't begin to tell you.

-So it's the sort of thing that could throw him.

-OK. Very good.

Thank you very much indeed.

Now, Hannah and Jonny didn't win the jackpot last time,

so we add another £1,000 to that.

So today's jackpot starts off at £2,000. There we are.

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

The only thing you have to remember is this, Hal,

the pair with the highest score

at the end of each round will be eliminated.

You just have to do everything you can not to be that pair.

OK, our first category this afternoon is...

Celebrities. Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second? THEY SPEAK IN HUSHED VOICES

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

There we go. Famous Alans.

-Hold on to your seats, everybody.

-LAUGHTER

On each board, we're going to show you seven descriptions

of famous people who we know by the name Alan.

You just have to tell us the most of obscure, please.

Going to be 14 Alans to collect at home.

-Very, very best of luck.

-This is too exciting for words.

We are looking for these famous Alans.

Here is our first board of Alans.

I'm going to read those one last time.

Hal, a very warm welcome. Good to have you back with us.

Now, Hal, remind us what you do.

I work for the British Forces Broadcasting Service,

BFBS. I'm a radio presenter,

broadcast between four and seven, Monday to Friday.

So what was the story last time, Hal?

I'm sure you knew lower answers than the ones you gave.

Yeah, I had a look at the board and I thought, "That's a tricky board.

"Maybe a lot of people are going to struggle."

So I thought, "I'll play it really safe."

And I was pretty sure we'd get through

knowing how good Adam is at everything. And it worked.

It did work in Round One.

Worked less well in Round Two, though.

It's my job to entertain, you know?

I'm like a modern-day Vera Lynn.

LAUGHTER

So you are, Hal.

Now, look, you get first dibs on this board.

What would you like to go for? Which of the Alans?

Do you know? I'm much more confident with this.

I'm thinking the one I'm going to go with is actually the top one

cos I'm not sure too many people will know...

-Alan Hansen.

-Alan Hansen, says Hal.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Alan Hansen.

It's right.

33.

APPLAUSE That's a good Alan, Hal.

You went for a good Alan.

33. Good start to the round.

Well played, Hal,

getting this big Alan round off to a grandstand start.

Yeah, his autobiography was called Tall, Dark And Hansen.

LAUGHTER There we are.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Izzi, welcome back to Pointless. Great to have you here from Bath.

-Yes.

-Remind us what you get up to, Izzi.

I am a student at Leeds, Leeds Uni.

So I've just finished my second year there.

-And what are you reading again?

-I'm studying economics and geography.

Did you start off doing economics and geography?

Yeah, I've done it from the word go. I really liked both of them.

Now not so much.

I was going to say, which one's sort of come to prominence? Neither?!

Definitely much prefer economics now.

But geography, not so much a strong subject

-as soon as I moved to uni.

-Right, sure.

-A lot of reading, which I don't enjoy.

-No.

It's just not compatible with university life, is it?

It's really not. It takes up way too much time.

Absolutely right.

Izzi, what would you like to go for on our board full of Alans?

I know I'm going to kick myself about the Harry Potter Alan

because I definitely know it, but I've gone blank.

And the only other one I know is The Apprentice,

which I'm sure is going to be a pretty big score.

But, yeah, I'm going to go with that one

-and Sir Alan Sugar.

-OK.

Well, your father's abs... No expression at all,

not portraying any inner turmoil with that.

Alan Sugar. Let's hope it goes a long way down the column, Izzi.

How many of our 100 people said Sir Alan Sugar?

It's right.

60.

APPLAUSE A little bit of a burden for David

in the next pass,

but I'm sure he can do it. 60 for Alan Sugar.

Could've been more damaging, Alan Sugar.

In the other part of my career as a producer,

we once made a reality show where a group of teen boys and teen girls

had to manage bars at the opposite ends of a beach out in Ibiza.

And they were trying to name the bar, the girls,

and they took ages and ages.

Then one girl goes, "I've got it. I've got it.

"We call the bar Sugar,

"but we spell it S-U-G-A-R."

LAUGHTER

Thank you very much indeed.

-Fibon, a warm welcome to you to Pointless.

-Thank you.

Great to have you here. What do you do, Fibon?

I'm a student at Newcastle University.

-What are you studying?

-Economics as well.

Economics? Have you been swapping notes with Izzi?

-Not yet, no.

-Not yet. What year are you in?

-I've just finished second year as well.

-Identical!

It would be very interesting to see

what the different courses have taught you.

What are your interests when you're not studying hard?

Just sports, really.

Football, rugby, darts, athletics. Anything sport-related.

All the sports. Everything from football to darts.

Fabulous. Fibon, what would you like to go for from our Alans?

I'd like to go for the bottom one. I know it's probably going to be

a high scorer, but it's the only one I'm certain on.

-So I'm going to go for Alan Shearer.

-Alan Shearer, says Fibon.

Let's see how many of our 100 people say Alan Shearer.

It's right.

-Ooh, 80. AUDIENCE:

-Oh!

APPLAUSE 80. That's a high score.

Great news for Alan Shearer,

great news for David there on podium two as well.

It's also great news for

the Leeds University economics course over and above

the Newcastle University economics course.

-It is 20 better...

-20 better.

-..it turns out.

-There we are.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

-Now then, Nikki, a warm welcome to Pointless.

-Hi.

What do you do, Nikki?

I work for an airline company. I'm a passenger service agent.

-Check-in and things like that?

-I do check-in.

It's all ground operations. I don't go flying in the air just yet.

Is that quite fun, the check-in? Are people generally nice...?

I've got an interest in aviation anyway, so, yeah,

-and every day's different.

-Yeah.

Now, Nikki, all these Alans still on the table, all yours.

If you wanted to, you could talk through all of them.

OK. So, I was quite confident that I know them all

apart from the second one.

The Jonathan Creek, I think, is Alan Partridge.

The BAFTA-winning actor, I think, is Alan Rickman.

But my answer I'm going to go for the member of The Animals

-which is Alan Price.

-Alan Price.

I was hoping someone would say that. Brilliant answer. Alan Price.

Let's see how many of our 100... Oh, sorry! Jeopardy.

Oh, I wonder if that's right. LAUGHTER

Let's see if it's right, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

Well done.

19.

APPLAUSE

-19 for Alan Price.

-Very well played, Nikki.

Yeah, proud Geordie band as well, The Animals.

Now, you had a slight brain freeze on Jonathan Creek.

-It's not Alan Partridge - it's Alan Davies.

-Oh, right, OK.

Alan Partridge is someone very different.

-LAUGHTER

-Alan Davies would've scored you 54.

The BAFTA award-winning actor, you were absolutely right on.

Was Alan Rickman.

Would've scored you 30.

And this last answer is a pointless answer.

-It's Alan Cumming.

-Alan Cumming is the answer.

Very well done if you said that at home.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at those scores.

Well done, Nikki.

19 for Alan Price. Brilliant answer there.

Then we travel up to 33,

Hal and Adam, I salute you. Lovely low scoring there.

Then up to 60 on podium two, Izzi and David.

Then 80, Fibon and Luke.

Now, Luke, we need a low score from you,

so best of luck with that. We're going to come back down the line.

Can the second players step up to the podium?

OK. We're going to put seven more famous Alans up on the board,

and here they are.

We've got...

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are.

-Now, Dianne, a very warm welcome. Here from Wakefield.

-Thank you.

-What do you do, Dianne?

-Well, I don't work any longer.

So I suppose I'm retired.

What did you work as when you were working?

Initially, my career was I worked for the civil service,

at the Post Office headquarters, as it was then, the civil service.

In the latter part of my working life,

I worked behind a Post Office counter for 20 years.

So I switched sides.

-Can you still count through a pile of notes at alarming speed?

-Yes.

Oh, that's pleasing. Yes. LAUGHTER

-Now, Dianne, there you are. You're on 19.

-I am.

-A lovely low score there...

-I am.

-..from your daughter-in-law.

What would you like to go for?

If you can score 60 or less, you're home and dry.

Well...I'm going to have to play a little bit safe,

and I'm going to go for the gardener and TV broadcaster

-and say Alan Titchmarsh.

-Alan Titchmarsh.

Well, you've earned the right to be a little more cautious there

thanks to Nikki. There's your red line.

If you get below that, you're into Round Two.

Let's see how many people said Alan Titchmarsh.

Not bad. 65.

APPLAUSE 65 takes your total up to 84.

I think you've done enough there.

I think you could afford to do that cos of Nikki's great score.

Alan Titchmarsh, a lovely fella, and one of the many people

that you entertain us with impressions of in the make-up room.

-I do.

-Yeah.

Yeah, I've got a little Titchmarsh up my sleeve.

LAUGHTER Now, Luke, welcome to the show.

-Great to have you here. Also from Gateshead.

-Yes.

And what do you do, Luke?

I'm a student at Newcastle University as well.

-And what are you studying?

-Maths and accounting.

-Are you having a good time? Are you enjoying Newcastle?

-Erm...

-It's all right.

-LAUGHTER

Luke, what would you like to be doing more of?

I do a lot of sports. Same as Fibon. I play a lot of football...

-Right you are.

-..darts, snooker.

-OK.

-I like my pub sports.

-There we are.

What would you like to go for, Luke?

You aren't the high-scorers at the moment,

but you need to score 3 or less to avoid becoming the high-scorers.

I feel as though I should know the bottom one, but I don't.

It's not coming to us.

As a Newcastle fan, I know that one.

It's going to be high, though, cos it's very recent.

I know the top one as well.

Yeah, I'll go for the comedian.

I'll go Alan Carr.

Alan Carr, says Luke. OK. Here's your red line.

It's quite far down the column.

Let's see how far down the column

you get with Alan Carr.

54.

APPLAUSE 134 is your total.

It's a very Geordie-dominated first round, this,

cos Alan Carr's dad is Graham Carr who's the chief scout to Newcastle.

-Has been for many... Very successfully as well.

-OK.

There we are. Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

-David. Welcome back.

-Thank you.

Now, we discovered that you are a chartered surveyor.

-I am indeed, yeah.

-Is that a bit like being an estate agent?

It is, but we don't like to be called estate agents.

I see. And the difference is what?

Erm...not a lot, to be honest with you.

We're qualified, I suppose.

Oh, and they're just not? Simply not.

Anyway, now, David, there you are on 60.

The high-scorers at the moment are Luke and Fibon on 134.

So 73 or less, David, gets you through.

Erm, I think I know a couple,

but I think I'm going to go for the Australian driver

who won the Formula One World Championship

as Alan Jones.

Alan Jones, says David. Alan Jones.

Good answer. There is your red line. Let's see if Alan Jones is right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It is right.

Through you go to Round Two.

Very comfortably indeed.

Alan Jones taking us way down.

15. Very well done.

APPLAUSE Lowest score of the round

in fact, David, so far.

-Takes your total up to 75.

-Well played, David.

Yeah, first man to win it in a Williams, Alan Jones.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Adam, welcome back. Now, remind us what you do, Adam.

I'm a transmission operator for BFBS Television.

-Is that a technical role, then?

-Yes, it is.

But if things go too wrong, then I'm not the person to call upon.

I see. But you sound like you should be involved in continuity

-or perhaps you should be on screen, Adam.

-That's very kind.

You have a screen-friendly presence. You'd agree with me.

Oh, he does. Very much. Look and sound.

-Look and sound.

-Yeah.

-BFBS, take note.

Now, Adam, this board is all yours.

It doesn't matter what you score - you're into Round Two.

Do you want to talk us through the board?

The actor who plays Tyrone in Coronation Street, his name is Alan.

-That's all you're getting from me.

-LAUGHTER

The Mormon family singer, it must be Alan Osmond.

The manager of Crystal Palace is Alan Pardew.

And a name popped into my head for the Kiwi actor,

and I was getting less and less confident as we went along,

but as there's nothing to lose,

I will go...

-Alan Dale.

-Alan Dale.

Oh, that sounds like a good name. We think that's a good name.

Alan Dale. Let's find it if it's right.

No red line for you - you're already through.

But let's see if Alan Dale gets you down the column.

It is Alan Dale.

Very well done, Adam.

Look at that. Down it goes.

21.

APPLAUSE Very good indeed. Adam and Hal, 54.

That's a statement of intent for this game, I think, from podium one.

-54 is your total.

-Yeah, great answer, Adam. Well played.

He's a weird career, where everyone of our generation

knew him as Jim Robinson. He was a very sort of staid guy.

And then ever since then,

he turns up in every single massive-budget US TV series.

He's in 24, he's in Lost, Ugly Betty.

He's in all sorts of things, isn't he?

Now, Alan Osmond, you're absolutely correct about.

Big scorer, though. Would've scored you 60.

The Newcastle United manager, much, much better answer than Alan Carr.

It is of course Alan Pardew.

It's not a small scorer. Would've scored 38 still.

And the actor in Coronation Street is Alan Halsall.

Well done if you said that.

It's the best answer on the board with 5 points.

Thanks very much indeed. So, at the end of our first round,

the pair we're having to say goodbye with their high score of 134,

I'm sorry, Luke and Fibon, it is you.

Had you gone for Alan Pardew, it still wouldn't have saved you,

but it would've been a slightly lower score.

We'll see you next time and hope you go further then.

But thanks very much indeed. Luke and Fibon.

-Thank you.

-APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Very well done, everybody. We've made it through to Round Two.

Just one more round to go before we can start conferring.

And at the end of this round we'll say goodbye to another pair.

David, well done. Lowest individual score in that round.

And, Hal, well done. I think you've got it.

I'm absolutely confident now.

You are completely across the rules of Pointless.

Best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two this afternoon is...

Board Games. Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. Let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We give 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

Squares on a Monopoly board whose names contain the letter A. Richard.

Yeah, and those are more specifically the squares

on the classic original Monopoly board, please.

OK. Right, Adam.

-Many options.

-Yes, many.

I will go for...

Pall Mall.

Pall Mall, says Adam.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Pall Mall.

38.

APPLAUSE

-38.

-Yeah, 140 quid, pink. Pall Mall.

Thank you very much. OK, Izzi.

I do like Monopoly.

I hope this is correct.

But I'm going to say Super Tax.

Super Tax, says Izzi. Super Tax.

OK, let's see how many of our 100 people said Super Tax.

I like what you've done there, Izzi.

You see.

APPLAUSE There you are. 2 for Super Tax.

That's a great answer, Izzi. Very well played.

I'm just thinking this all plays into David's hands, this round.

-Absolutely.

-It's all about chartered surveying, Monopoly.

-Isn't it?

-Pretty much.

-Absolutely.

-Buying and selling, property valuations.

-Mm!

Thank you very much.

-Dianne.

-Mm.

-What would you like to go for?

I've got two in my head.

But I think...I'm going to go for

-Old Kent Road.

-Old Kent Road, says Dianne.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Old Kent Road.

It's right.

31.

APPLAUSE 31 for Old Kent Road.

Yeah, £60, Old Kent Road.

-And that A, it is devilishly hidden, isn't it, towards the end?

-Mm.

-Mm.

Clever. Very clever. Thank you very much indeed.

We're halfway through the round. Let's look at those scores.

2, Izzi. Hats off to you.

Very well done. Lovely low score there.

Then we travel all the way up to 31, where we find Dianne and Nikki.

Then up to 38,

Adam and Hal. Not that far ahead. But, Hal,

get thinking of a nice low score.

Let's hope it keeps you in the game.

We're going to come back down the line.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

Nikki. So, just to remind you, we are looking for any square

on the London-based Monopoly board whose name contains the letter A.

You're on 31.

I mean, if you can score 6 or less, you'll avoid being our high-scorers.

Again, I've got a couple in my head

but it's trying to think of a low one.

I'm going to go for...

Go to Jail.

Go to Jail, says Nikki.

Here is your red line. Quite a long way down.

But let's see how close to that

you can get with Go to Jail.

Well done. Look at that. 22.

APPLAUSE Nice score there.

Takes your total up to 53.

Yeah, another very good answer. Well played, Nikki.

Might have kept yourself in it there.

That's got an A in the last word.

-There it is. Got it.

-Got it?

-Found it.

-There you are.

Thank you very much.

David. Well, you've been left in very good shape by Izzi.

Yes, I have.

50 or less. 50 or less!

Well, I think I'll go for The Strand.

The Strand. Well, we'll find out later which one you're thinking of.

I have a hunch I might know. The Strand, says David.

Let's see if that's right

and how many of our 100 people said The Strand.

There's your red line.

Well done. You are

in the head-to-head.

Oh, look at that.

APPLAUSE 12.

Takes your total up to 14.

-Hidden in plain view, the A there.

-Isn't it, though?

-Isn't it?

-Yeah, it really is.

-Good lord.

It's just Strand on the board, but The Strand, perfectly acceptable.

There we are.

Now, Hal, we now have a target for you, a precise target.

The figure is 14.

We need less than 14 from you, Hal.

I'd don't have the original Monopoly.

-But you must have played it, though.

-Never played it.

-Really?

Yeah, I've got one of these modern versions,

and I know all of the squares on that, but they are not the original.

-So I've got an idea from what's on my board.

-OK, OK.

Which everyone's probably going to laugh at,

but there is a square towards the end which says Free Parking.

-AUDIENCE MEMBER:

-Yes.

-They like that. I like that.

LAUGHTER There is your red line.

If you can get below that red line,

you have essentially landed on Free Parking.

Let's see. Free Parking, how many of our 100 people said it?

It's right.

You've done it! 13.

APPLAUSE You needed 14.

You got 13, Hal. Very well done indeed.

51 is your total.

Oh, phew.

Very well played, Hal. Terrific stuff.

I'll tell you what, if you're going to update Monopoly,

-surely the first square to go would be Free Parking.

-Yeah.

You might as well still have Early Closing Wednesdays.

-LAUGHTER

-There's no pointless answers at all,

which goes to show what a good answer Super Tax was.

There is one 1-point answer and that is...

Whitehall. Whitehall.

Very well done if you said that.

Electric Company would've scored you 4,

Euston Road would've scored you 4,

5 points for Marlborough Street and Pentonville Road,

6 for Income Tax and Northumberland Avenue,

7 for Liverpool Street Station.

9 for King's Cross Station and Fenchurch Street Station.

11 for Waterworks, 18 for Chance.

Then you've got 20 for Piccadilly and The Angel Islington,

21 for Whitechapel Road, In Jail, 23.

Marylebone Station, 27.

And the top three, let's take a look at them.

Pal Mall. 38. Actually the third biggest scorer.

Park Lane, 51. What do you think is top?

-Well, I'm going to say Mayfair.

-Mayfair, yeah. 58 points.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Well, at the end of our second round, I'm very sorry to say,

Nikki and Dianne, we have to say goodbye to you.

I mean, really, very, very close indeed.

But we will see you again next time. We look forward to that very much.

In the meantime, thanks very much. Nikki and Dianne.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

Very well done, David and Izzi, Hal and Adam,

you are now one step closer to the final and a chance

to play for that jackpot, which is still standing at £2,000.

There it is.

This is where you start playing as a team.

You can chat before you give your answer. First pair to win

two questions go through to the final and play for that jackpot.

It should be very close. Best of luck to both pairs.

Let's play the head-to-head.

Here comes your first question, and it concerns...

Eurovision Song Contests. Richard.

We're going to show you some bar graphs that show you the top five

finishers in different years of the Eurovision Song Contest.

We need you to say who won in those particular years, please.

You'll see the flag of the winner at the top.

It's only the act who won the Eurovision Song Contest

in that year, please.

This is the most exciting thing ever.

I've never said this in 900 plus Pointless shows.

Let's reveal our five graphs.

Oh! Wow. There's A.

We want you to name the winning act

on each of those graphs

in each of those years.

Now, David and Izzi, you're our low scorers, so you will go first.

Feel free to confer.

Do you know...?

The...the... I'm not sure.

D, I'm not sure.

Britain have won that...

I know what E is.

We're going to go with E

and we think that's Conchita Wurst.

OK, Conchita Wurst. Conchita Wurst, say David and Izzi.

Now, Hal and Adam, talk us through the graphs.

-Yes...

-Mm-hm.

-Yeah.

-Big yes.

-They are lovely graphs.

Oh, thank you.

It's going to be a bit of a guess.

But it's going to be A and

Bucks Fizz.

A and Bucks Fizz.

There we are. So we have Conchita Wurst and Bucks Fizz.

David and Izzi went for Conchita Wurst for E.

Let's see if that's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said Conchita Wurst.

It's right.

14.

APPLAUSE

14 for Conchita Wurst. That is a good score.

Hal and Adam have gone for Bucks Fizz for A.

Let's see how far down the column we get with Bucks Fizz.

It's right.

Oh, that's also going to be a good score.

Look at that. Very close indeed.

APPLAUSE 19.

Very well done indeed.

Congratulations to both pairs for grasping this with both hands,

this new format of round. Wasn't that fun?

Particular congratulations, though, to David and Izzi.

-After one question, you're up 1-0.

-Yeah, very well played.

Now, there's a couple of answers there

that would've won you the points.

B would not cos that is Abba.

With 25 points.

C, it's Johnny Logan with Hold Me Now.

The second of his wins. 8 points for that.

And who could forget, in 1968, Spain won with La, La, La by Massiel?

Massiel. Very well done if you said that. 1 point.

There we are. Thank you very much.

Here's your second question. Hal and Adam, you get to answer it first,

but you have to win it to stay in the game so best of luck.

It concerns...

-British islands. Richard.

-We're going to show you the names

of five British islands, or Crown Dependencies, Overseas Territories,

but we've missed out alternate letters.

-Can you fill in those gaps, please?

-Thanks very much.

Let's reveal our British islands with bits missing,

and here they are. We've got...

I'll read those all one last time.

Hal and Adam will go first.

I know three, four and five.

Go with whichever one you think.

What's the second one?

Cayman Islands. Do you think

Saint Helena is a good answer?

I think we're going to go

right down the middle and say

-Saint Helena.

-Saint Helena, say Hal and Adam. Saint Helena.

David and Izzi, do you want to talk us through

the rest of those islands?

We'd love to, but we're struggling, to be honest with you, on them.

And the only one

we can definitely get, I hope,

is the Isles of Scilly.

OK, the Isles of Scilly.

So, we have Saint Helena and the Isles of Scilly.

Hal and Adam went for Saint Helena.

Let's see how many of our 100 people spotted that.

It's right.

That is a great score,

Hal and Adam. Very well done indeed.

APPLAUSE 10.

10 for Saint Helena. Now, David and Izzi, meanwhile,

have gone for the Isles of Scilly. Let's see if that's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said the Isles of Scilly.

It's right.

60 for the Isles of Scilly.

APPLAUSE There we are.

Hal and Adam, back in the game. After two questions, it's 1-1.

Very well played. Yes, Saint Helena,

obviously where Napoleon Bonaparte was exiled.

-Now the top two are...

-Pitcairn.

-Pitcairn Islands. 24 points.

I'm struggling with the second one.

-It's got more registered businesses...

-Cayman!

-..than people.

-Cayman.

-Cayman Islands. Yeah.

Notorious tax haven. 45 points.

-And the bottom one.

-Jersey.

Jersey. Yeah.

That would've scored 79.

So, Saint Helena, best answer on the board, guys, well played.

Thanks very much indeed.

Well, it comes down to our third question.

Whoever wins this one, the decider, goes through to the final

and plays for that jackpot. Best of luck to both pairs.

Our deciding question concerns...

People with palindromic names. Izzi.

I know, Izzi should be good at this. We're going to show you

five descriptions of people whose first names are palindromes.

Can you tell us these names, please? Very best of luck.

OK. Let's reveal our five clues, and here they come.

We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

David and Izzi will go first.

-Do you know any?

-Elle Macpherson.

Yeah. Do you know any of the others?

Do you know the S Club 7?

Rachel Stevens.

Erm, I think we're going to go with the Australian model

and presenter of Britain and Ireland's Next Top Model

and Elle Macpherson.

Elle Macpherson, say David and Izzi. Elle Macpherson.

Now, Hal and Adam, do you want to talk us through that board?

-No.

-No. Not at all.

-LAUGHTER

Although, as I sit here, one has just popped into my mind.

-The bottom one...

-Yeah?

I think Otto von Bismarck.

OK. I like the Bismarck. You're going Otto.

So we have Elle and we have Otto.

Now, David and Izzi went for Elle.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Elle.

Elle is right.

25.

APPLAUSE

25 for Elle. Now, Hal and Adam have gone for Otto.

Let's see if that's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said Otto.

It's right.

It's got to beat 25.

Which it does.

15 for Otto.

Very well done indeed, Adam. APPLAUSE

That popped in in the nick of time there, and it means,

after three questions, Hal and Adam are through to the final 2-1.

Two good answers there. Well played both teams.

The biggest scorer on the board is the S Club 7 one, funnily enough,

which is Hannah Spearritt.

And that would've scored 29.

And the top one...is Ava Gardner.

Would've scored you 11.

And the actor is the lovely Nitin Ganatra.

-And that would've scored you 3 points.

-There we are.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

I'm so sorry, David and Izzi.

Two very solid performances on the show.

Lovely to have you in the head-to-head on both of those.

And you just came up against our palindromic names, Izzi,

-ironically, was where you fell.

-I know.

David and Izzi, it's been wonderful having you. Thank you for playing.

David and Izzi, wonderful contestants.

APPLAUSE

But, for Hal and Adam, it's now time for our Pointless final.

What about that?

Hal and Adam, you've seen off all the competition

and you have now won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot,

and at the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £2,000.

Well, I think there's something poetic about this.

Lovely to have you here in the final round.

What would you like to see come up in this final round?

-Football.

-LAUGHTER

-Adam?

-Easy.

-Well, that was said with so much authority,

-I don't feel I can argue with that.

-LAUGHTER

Let's hope there's something there you like the look of.

There's usually something vaguely football-related,

but not always, by any means.

Today's selection looks like this.

I think ice-skating might be football-related. Don't you think?

-LAUGHTER

-OK.

Diamonds - obviously big in both our lives.

-Can't get enough of ice-skating.

-I like...books.

-You do like crime books.

-Yeah.

-American authors?

Oh, can't move in my house for American crime authors(!)

-Not great on music.

-Erm...music, I'm pretty bad at.

It's got to be one of the middle two, I think.

But, Howard, you host the drive-time show on BFBS.

Yeah, I know where this is going.

How can popular albums of 2014 be so forbidding?

I know exactly where this is going, and I anticipated this question.

You know, you don't really have to listen to the music,

-you just talk after the songs.

-LAUGHTER

-Got to be albums, I think.

-That's what it's going to be?

-It's got to be albums.

-Sorry, Hal.

A bit more pressure on you there, but albums popular...

But it's popular albums. That's handy, isn't it?

At least it's not the unpopular ones.

LAUGHTER Popular albums of 2014. Richard.

We're looking for any tracks on the original release of...

So, three massive albums there.

Any tracks on the original releases of Caustic Love,

Wanted On Voyage or In the Lonely Hour.

-Very best of luck.

-There we go.

Now, as always, you've got up to one minute

to come up with three answers and all you need to win that jackpot

is for just one of your answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

LAUGHTER

OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock. There they are.

Your time starts now.

I think...George Ezra

did...Cassy O'.

That'll do. I like that.

-We'll have that.

-Let's go with that.

-It's an answer.

-It's something.

-Some of this must've sunk in.

No, none.

LAUGHTER

Yep. I mean, do we talk for the whole 60?

Popular...popular titles

always include the word love.

Love, yeah.

Yeah, love. Something with love in.

-Mm.

-Ring any bells?

-I'm probably going to lose my job after this.

-Probably.

-LAUGHTER

-And you'd be right to.

I'm very witty in between the songs,

very witty.

So, we've got...

What was the George Ezra one?

-Cassy O', I think.

-Cassy O'.

-Yeah.

-Sam Smith?

-Oh, yeah, he's on there.

LAUGHTER

These are the wrong three artists

for me, you may have gathered.

My mother bought me

Paolo Nutini's album.

Sorry, Mum, haven't listened

-to it yet.

-Ten seconds left.

Yeah, we'll have to go with Cassy O', I think.

-Yeah. And any more?

-Nope.

We need two more.

We need two more?! Oh.

-Great.

-There's your time up. Good.

Well, that's in the nick of time there.

What answers would you like to give me? Three of them.

Well, I think we have one that might actually be a song.

-And that is Cassy O'.

-Cassy O'.

-By George Ezra.

-OK, Cassy O'.

And playing on the theme that, you know, love is a popular...title,

I'm sure Paolo Nutini must have sung a song called A Thing Called Love.

-A Thing Called Love.

-And also...

..that very popular cover he did of Love Is In The Air.

-Love Is In The Air, also by Paolo Nutini.

-Yeah, yeah.

OK, of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Probably the right one.

-Probably Cassy O'.

-Cassy O', OK.

-LAUGHTER Cassy O' last.

-Hang my hat on.

OK. What do you want to put first? Least likely?

-I don't remember the other two songs.

-A Thing Called Love?

-Maybe we should go for that. OK.

-I'm not feeling that one.

OK. Well, let's pop those answers up on the board in that order,

and here they are. Look at these.

There we are. Well, very, very best of luck.

Three wonderful answers there on the board.

If one of these happened to be pointless - I have to ask you -

what would you do with the money?

I would pay you off so you never aired this episode.

LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

I'll tell you what, there speaks a man who does not know your price.

Yeah.

LAUGHTER

Adam?

Oh, I would definitely indulge in

all Paolo Nutini's recent works, I think.

-And maybe a bit of George Ezra.

-OK.

Well, let's go through this.

Your first answer was A Thing Called Love by Paolo Nutini.

We were looking for any tracks on the album Caustic Love.

Only one of these has to be pointless

for you to win that jackpot.

Let's see how many people went for A Thing Called Love.

If it's pointless, it'll be worth £2,000 to you.

No, I'm afraid not there.

-AUDIENCE:

-Aw!

-I'm afraid not there.

Your next answer was the cover of Love Is In The Air,

also on Caustic Love by Paolo Nutini.

It has to be there, then it has to be pointless

for you to win that jackpot of £2,000.

Let's see how many people said Love Is In The Air, is it right?

CHUCKLING

-I fear not. AUDIENCE:

-Aw!

No, there we are. OK, now...now, come on.

Here we are on terra firma here.

We're back in the world of actual things.

Your third answer...your third and final answer is Cassy O',

and in this case we were looking for George Ezra tracks

on Wanted On Voyage. Cassy O'.

It has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot of £2,000,

but let's see how many of our 100 people said Cassy O'.

Is it pointless?

It's right. There we go. Now, A Thing Called Love,

I'm afraid, was incorrect.

Love Is In The Air, likewise, incorrect.

Cassy O', though, down it goes.

Through the teens, into single figures.

Still going down.

Oh, 6.

APPLAUSE

Listen, there we are. That was a valiant attempt

when presented with things you didn't know.

Unfortunately, you didn't manage to find

that all-important pointless answer,

so you don't win today's jackpot of £2,000.

That will roll over onto the next show,

but it has been fabulous having you both on the programme - twice!

And through to the final this last time. Enormous fun.

Thank you for coming and playing so well and being such good sports,

and you take home a Pointless trophy each, so there you are.

It hasn't all been in vain. Hal and Adam.

APPLAUSE

I think that's what we call a valiant effort, gents.

Very well played. You've been great fun.

Let's take a look at the pointless answers for Paolo Nutini first.

You could've had...

You could've made up those. One Day, Someone Like You.

Also could've had Bus Talk.

That would've been harder to make up, probably.

Diana, Fashion and Superfly.

Let's take a look at George Ezra. This is another lovely album.

Also Spectacular Rival and Stand By Your Gun.

Those were pointless answers for George Ezra.

And only three pointless answers on the Sam Smith album.

Gents, you've been very, very entertaining.

Hal, I'm so sorry you've lost your job.

-And...

-LAUGHTER

The worst thing about that, of course, British Forces Broadcasting,

they don't fire you, they court-martial you. It's much worse.

You may not know about music, but you've been

so genuinely entertaining, you both have. I can see why they employ you

and I'm sure they will do for many years to come.

Thank you so much, gents.

APPLAUSE

Well, unfortunately, we have to say goodbye to you, Hal and Adam,

but it's been fab having you on the show.

Thank you both so much for playing. Hal and Adam.

Wonderful, wonderful contestants.

APPLAUSE

Well, sadly, Hal and Adam didn't win our jackpot today,

which means it rolls over onto the next show

when we'll be playing for £3,000. There it is.

-AUDIENCE:

-Ooh!

Join us next time to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.