Episode 55 Pointless

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong,

and a very warm welcome to Pointless,

the game where we are always aiming for the lowest score.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

I'm Ruth, this is Frank,

and we come from a village called Stawell near Bridgwater.

-Couple number two.

-Hi, I'm Lup, this is my partner Ray,

and we're from south London.

-Couple number three.

-Hi, I'm Simon,

this is my wife Leila and we're from Chapstow.

And finally, couple number four.

I'm Steve and this is my son Chris, and we're from Dover in Kent.

And these are today's contestants.

Thank you very much, all of you. A very warm welcome to Pointless.

We'll get the chat to each of you of course

throughout the show as it goes along.

So that's just leaves one person for me to introduce.

He says his most embarrassing moment on telly may well happen

during this episode. It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

Hi, everybody. Good afternoon.

-Good afternoon to you.

-Good afternoon.

-A couple of things.

Firstly, we welcome back Leila and Simon, the only returning pair,

got knocked out in the first round last time,

so hopefully see an awful lot more of you this time.

And secondly, how is Steve Chris's dad?!

-He looks about 30.

-I know.

-What's gone on there?

You're going to have to talk to them about that quite seriously.

But most importantly - we will clear that up -

most importantly, that jackpot keeps getting bigger.

-Oh, yes, I know.

-Doesn't it? No-one's winning it.

Sometimes we get, like, five people win in a row.

It's rare. I can't remember when it was last this big.

-It's nice, isn't it?

-Extraordinary.

It's like the good old days.

-I know!

-At some point, it's going to be worth our while absconding.

LAUGHTER

I have already squirrelled some of it away,

I'm just going to tell you right now.

I think if another thousand goes on it today,

-the two of us should scarper.

-We'll just go.

I tell you where we'll go - Panama.

That's the place to go. That's where I'm going.

Actually, it's no tax on this anyway.

Winnings, no tax.

Yeah, stealings, you don't pay tax on that either, do you?

Thanks very much indeed.

Now, Paula and Mark didn't win the jackpot last time,

so we add another £1,000 to that, so today's jackpot starts off...

Look at this.

-AUDIENCE:

-Ooh!

Goodness me. Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

OK, now, remember this,

the pair with the highest score at the end of each round

will be eliminated. That is all you have to remember.

That and of course no conferring till we get to the head-to-head round.

Other than that, very, very best of luck to all four pairs.

Our first category today...

Oh, Ruth, I'm sorry.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second. And whoever's going first,

please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

-Richard.

-On each board,

I'm going to show you the names of seven UK Top 40 singles,

all of which have a US city, town or borough in their title.

You just need to tell us what that city, town or borough is, please,

because we've missed it out of the title.

OK, thanks very much. So, please supply the missing US locations

to these song titles. Here's our first board.

I'll read those all again.

Ruth, welcome to Pointless. Lovely to have you here.

-What you do?

-Well, I'm retired.

-What DID you do, Ruth?

I was a NHS nurse for over 30 years

and over 20 of those I was a community.

Right, that's a sort of district nurse, is that?

-Yes.

-The old-fashioned district nurse?

-Yeah.

And what do you do now, Ruth, what fills your time?

Well, yeah, I'm a member of our church benefice choir.

So how often do you sing? Weekly?

Well, usually it is on the United service once a month

our choir sings, and we do a couple of concerts

through the year as well.

That's nice. Very good.

Ruth, how do you find this board? I saw that wince on your face...

Well, actually, not too bad because there's a few there from our era.

Are there any there that you sing with the United Benefice Choir?

Mmm...no.

SHE LAUGHS

No, if it was hymns, we'd be really good.

-Right.

-I think what I'm going to do is going to go for Gene Pitney,

Twenty Four Hours From Tulsa.

Twenty Four Hours From Tulsa.

Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Tulsa.

73!

Oh, Ruth, I thought that deserved to go much further down.

-I thought so.

-Anyway, good start to the game.

It is a good start. Yeah, Tulsa in Oklahoma.

Until 2006, tattoos were banned in Oklahoma.

-Isn't that interesting?

-Yes.

Well, you could get them over the border, though.

-HIGH-PITCHED:

-Can you believe it?

-HIGH-PITCHED: No.

LAUGHTER

-Lup.

-Hi.

-Welcome to Pointless.

Great to have you. What you do, Lup?

I'm an IT project manager.

Very good. I very much like Lup's shirt.

Yeah, it's nice, right?

I believe there's something sort of reflective on there.

-What is that?

-Sequins are picked out on part of the...piping.

It's a fabulous thing that, Lup.

-Thank you.

-Very good. Lup, what interests you outside of work?

Well, I took voluntary redundancy recently and I've been travelling.

Oh, now, that's nice. Well, how far abroad have you been?

I went to Marrakech for a while.

Brazil, Argentina, Malaysia.

Very nice indeed.

Lup, how do you find this board of missing US locations?

It's not too bad.

The difficult thing is working out which one

is going to have the lowest score.

I think I'm going to go for the Eurovision option,

Rise Like A Phoenix.

Oh, very good. Very good indeed.

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Phoenix.

There we are. Well, you passed Tulsa.

As many have.

20 for Phoenix.

Yeah, very well done. Clever, that, because it's not

referencing the actual city, but it is a city.

It's like that old knock-knock joke, isn't it?

-Knock-knock.

-Who's there?

-Phoenix.

-Phoenix who?

Phoenix my ice cream, I'm telling my mum.

Simon, welcome back.

-Hello.

-You are our only returning pair.

You are the thin line of communication

we have between the last show and this show.

And I say thin because we only saw you to Round One.

-Yeah.

-This time though...

This time we've got to see much, much more of you.

I'm thinking finalists. I'm going to put that out now.

Simon, remind us what you do.

I work for the council,

grounds maintenance operative, and just doing lots of things outdoors.

Very good. So a bit of gardening, bit of sort of...

-I was picturing bonfires last time.

-Yeah, we set some bonfires.

It's a little bit of everything, really.

How is a leaf blower's job done?

Because on a windy day, that's just...

Yeah, you feel like a dog chasing your own tail, really.

Yeah. There we are. Now, Simon, what would you like to go for?

I know a few of them. I know one for definite.

With the other one, I'm tempted to go for.

And I think I'm going to. Bruce Springsteen.

Is it the Streets Of Philadelphia?

Philadelphia, says Simon.

Leila looked slightly pained before you gave that answer

but she seems a bit relieved now. Let's see if that's right.

Philadelphia, how many of our 100 people said it?

It is Philadelphia. 73 still our high score, we pass that.

20's our low score.

29 is where you finish up there, Simon, not bad.

Yeah, very well played.

There is another city next to it, which is much smaller,

called Philadelphia Light.

LAUGHTER

Thank you very much, Richard. Chris.

-Hello.

-Warm welcome to Pointless to you.

-Chris, what do you do?

-I work on cross-Channel ferries.

-Dover to Calais.

-See, that is just perfect, because you're from Dover,

why wouldn't you? Is that...?

Does everybody kind of end up doing a stint on the ferries?

Pretty much. If you're from Dover, you work on a cross-Channel ferry.

-How long have you done that?

-On and off for about four years.

-On and off, of course.

-Yeah.

-That's how it works, isn't it?

LAUGHTER

Yeah. So which department of the ferry are you on?

Just stewarding, so bars, retail.

You're spending a lot of time offshore,

-you're duty-free, as it were.

-I am indeed, yeah.

That's nice, are you planning to stay on the ferries or...?

No. No.

You answered a little bit too quickly there.

-What would you like to do?

-I'd like to join the police.

I've tried to do that once, I'll try to do it again.

OK, border police, I guess, being in Dover would seem like a...

-Well, county police, yeah.

-County. Excellent.

Now, Chris, this board is all yours.

Would you like to fill in all the blanks?

I'd love to fill in all the blanks.

I can maybe fill in one for you.

I can fill in the obvious one,

so I feel like I'm going to stitch Dad up for the next round.

So Sting is Englishman In New York.

New York, says Chris.

Well, let's see how many of our 100 people said New York.

It's right. 73 still our high score.

But 65. Nestling in just below there.

Not a bad score but there are lower ones out there.

I would've thought that Dionne Warwick would have scored more,

but it doesn't, it scores fewer.

-San Jose.

-Yeah, "Do You Know the Way to San Jose?"

That would only have scored you 49 points.

-And I don't.

-Do you not?

-No, I don't.

-Get a plane from Gatwick.

There you go. Last Train To...?

-Something "ville". What is it?

-Clarksville.

Clarksville! There we are.

Clarksville, would have scored you 40.

That's a good song. And the REM one?

Is All the Way to Reno.

-Reno...

-Nevada. And that would have scored 5,

so very well done if you said that.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. 20, congratulations, Lup.

The best score of that pass, Lup and Ray.

I think you shall go to Round Two.

Then up to 29, where we find Simon and Leila.

Then up to 65, where we find Chris and Steve,

and 73, not too far out in front, Ruth and Frank.

Oh, but, Frank, you're going to be the last person to go.

You're going to have a board like the one

I asked Chris to fill in there.

So let's hope that there is something on there

that you know there's a nice low score.

We're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, let's put seven more song titles with US locations missing from them

on the board. And here they are.

I shall read those all one last time.

-Steve...

-Hello.

Steve, welcome to the show. You're never Chris's dad!

Come on! You're his older brother.

That's what they tell me.

Really? I mean, I'm not doubting the paternity,

let me get that quite clear.

But what is it? There must be something in the air in Dover.

And he's my second, I have an older one.

-Really?

-Yeah.

-Really?

Very fertile area, Dover.

Yes! There we are.

Steve, what do you do?

I'm a retailer, I run a mail-order business selling music books.

I see, sort of sheet music?

-Yeah, sheet music.

-How did you get into that?

I kind of fell into it by accident.

I graduated in music,

and I was just looking for a job to keep me going for a couple of years

before I started my performing career.

What were you going to be performing as?

Well, I'm an organist and a singer.

-Right.

-So, one of the two.

-One of those two?

-But I still do those,

but I do them alongside my day job.

I see, so, very nice, completely immersed in music there.

-Yeah, absolutely.

-I mean, organists and singers,

quite often conductors as well. Are you a music director too?

Yes, yes, I run three choirs, yes.

Wow. Steve, there you are on 65, you're not the highest scorers,

but you're getting quite close to it, so we need a low score from you.

7 or less would mean you were definitely in the next round.

Yes.

Well, it's great that pop music's popped up first,

because it gets it out of the way,

but it may also get us out of the way, it's not my strong suit.

But I'm going to go with Yellow Rose Of Texas.

Yellow Rose of Texas, says Steve.

Let's see if that's right and let's see how many of our 100 people

said it. There is your red line,

below that you are definitely through.

It IS Texas.

70 for The Yellow Rose of Texas,

that takes your total up to 135.

Yeah, big score for Texas there.

Thank you very much indeed. Now, I've got great news for you, Leila.

-Yeah?

-Round Two, Round Two has your name written all over it.

Which is fantastic. Doesn't matter what you score.

Remind us what you do.

-I'm a teacher.

-That's right, remind us what you teach.

Maths and English and some other subject as well.

Maths, English, she's being very coy about those other subjects, I feel.

Mm, I wonder.

Mm. What are your interests when school is out?

Um, I'm quite an avid Eurovision fan,

so the last board was better for me.

I actually go every year to Euromansion,

which is a whole weekend dedicated to the Eurovision Song Contest.

That sounds like a kind of hell!

-LAUGHTER

-It's amazing.

It's absolutely awesome.

Wow, Euromansion?

Yeah, it's a big group of us, we all love Eurovision, we all love a flag,

-we all bring food.

-Oh, no, that sounds fine, in that case.

You cheer it on? OK, now, there you are, well, listen, pressure off,

doesn't matter what you score,

but see if you can get a nice, low score.

Well, it's a bit of a nightmare.

I don't know any. I feel like I should know the Beastie Boys,

but I can't remember it, so I'm going to have a guess,

because I think it should be The Boston Tea Party.

OK, The Boston Tea Party.

So if they are playing it off a straight bat...

-Yes.

-..Boston Tea Party, surely.

Let's see. No red line for you, you are already through.

How many people said Boston?

And they were, precisely the bat they were using.

58 for The Boston Tea Party.

Taking your total up to 87.

Yeah, that would be a cruel trick,

-if it had been a different tea party, wouldn't it?

-I know. Surely.

But they were sensational, the Alex Harvey Band,

you don't get to be sensational by always...

And they were a band.

-They were.

-And Alex Harvey was in them.

-He was.

-Did exactly what it said on the tin.

-Yup.

Thank you very much. Now, Ray, welcome.

-Hello.

-What do you do, Ray?

I am a business manager for the English healthcare regulators.

Right you are. How long have you done that for?

-Just two years now.

-OK. Enjoyable, is it?

Yeah, but I'm not on the front line, doing the inspections themselves,

I'm in finance and commercial, in the background.

Right, I see. And what do you do apart from that, Ray?

-What keeps you happy?

-Well, I'm a little bit of a Whovian, let's say!

So I'm very happy to be here and meet you,

because you were on one of the shows.

Thank you very much indeed.

God, I mean, Doctor Who, I mean, there's plenty there, isn't there?

I've watched it since I was a kid.

-Yeah.

-Just a lifelong fan.

Do you collect things at all? Do you collect...

-I do indeed.

-..sort of cards and stickers and all those...?

Not to that degree. I've got a spare room of things.

OK, sort of to that degree!

Nothing crazy, just a spare room.

It IS crazy!

Says Lup! There you are. You are also through to the next round,

by the way, Ray, doesn't matter what you score.

What would you like to go for on that board?

The last board was better.

I only know one, which is the top one,

Put Your Hands Up For Detroit.

Put Your Hands Up For Detroit, says Ray.

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people said it.

No red line, you're already through.

It IS Detroit.

Might be rather a good score, this, I have a feeling.

Look at that! 13, Ray.

Very well done indeed.

33 is your total,

the lowest by a long way on this round.

Yeah, very good answer, great song as well.

Thank you very much indeed. Now then, Frank, welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you very much.

-Very good to have you here.

What do you do, Frank?

I'm retired, but I was in the army for 37 years before that.

Right, which regiment were you in?

A bit of a hybrid, really, I did lots of different things.

Lots of different things. What keeps you busy now, Frank?

I do writing, I write a lot, and I do a lot of am-dram,

-directing now, mainly.

-Excellent. Oh, that's fun.

What sort of am-dram do you do?

I directed Ruth in the last village panto.

-Was she good?

-Ruth was the Fairy Queen.

-Aww!

-Fantastic, she was.

Fantastic. Do you write the panto for each year?

No, no. I have written them, I used to write them in the army.

Wonderful. OK, now, Frank, you're on 73. Now, this is important,

you have to score 61 or less

-or we have to say goodbye to you at the end of this round.

-OK.

So that is some indication of the kind of obscurity

you are aiming for.

I'll go for Wichita Lineman.

The Wichita Lineman. The Wichita Lineman, says Frank.

Let's see if that's right, here is your red line,

you have to get below that with Wichita.

Let's see if it's right, let's see how many people said it.

It's right.

You've done it! Very well done indeed, look at that.

35.

Perfect score there, 108 is your total.

Well played, Frank, lovely song to end the round on as well.

Written by Jimmy Webb. Now, Queen of...?

-New Orleans.

-New Orleans, Jon Bon Jovi.

Low scorer, that, 4 points.

-Skyline?

-Manhattan.

Manhattan Skyline, A-Ha, 16 points.

And Beastie Boys, No Sleep Till...?

-Brooklyn.

-No Sleep Till Brooklyn, 14 points.

So, best answer on the board is New Orleans, well done if you said that.

There we are, thanks very much, Richard.

So, at the end of our first round, the pair we have to say goodbye to,

with their high score of 135, I'm sorry, Steve and Chris.

As you anticipated, this is where we say goodbye to you.

It gets you out of the way and that out of the way,

so next time you come back, you can sail through to the final,

I'm sure. But meantime, thank you very much for playing.

Steve and Chris.

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

And so we are down to three pairs. Obviously, at the end of this round,

we will have to say goodbye

to another pair for our head-to-head round.

But a warm welcome to all of you to Round Two.

Leila and Simon, this is your second show,

but you left at the end of the first round last time.

And hats off, Ray and Lup,

our low scorers individually and joint low scorers as well.

Best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two today is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second. And whoever's going first,

please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is, here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

Players beaten by Roger Federer.

Yeah, in January 2016, at the Australian Open,

Roger Federer won his 300th career Grand Slam singles match.

We're looking for anybody he's beaten

in any of those 300 matches, please.

Very best of luck.

Thanks, Richard. Ruth, do you follow tennis?

I do like it, yes, I always watch Wimbledon.

But trying to think up here...

-It's hard up there.

-It's hard up here.

-Yeah.

-Um, so...

I think

I will go...

Just wondering about being on the safe side.

Probably a high score, but I'll go for Rafael Nadal.

Rafael Nadal, says Ruth.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Rafa Nadal.

Not bad, 34 for Rafael Nadal.

Yeah, he's beaten Rafa twice in Grand Slam events.

Nadal has beaten him nine times.

Both Federer's wins came at Wimbledon.

Thank you, Richard.

Now, Ray...

-Ray, what would you like to go for? Oh, no?

-So bad.

Not a strong suit for you?

That's why I'm going first, so Lup knows what to play with.

I've only got two names in my head,

and it's because I'm forced to watch Wimbledon!

Um, Novak Djokovic.

Novak Djokovic, says Ray.

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Novak Djokovic.

Well, 34 is what we got for Nadal.

We've passed that, 31 for Djokovic.

We're going very obscure here early on, aren't we(?)

Djokovic and Nadal. Yeah, he's actually beaten him

six times in Grand Slams.

He's beaten him in all four Grand Slams, no-one else has done that,

but Djokovic has also beaten HIM in all four Grand Slams as well.

There we are, thank you very much, Richard.

Now then, Simon...

Simon, what would you like to go for?

Um, I'm going to go for maybe the less obvious British player,

-and go with Tim Henman.

-Tim Henman, says Simon.

Let's see if that's right, let's see

how many of our 100 people said Tim Henman.

It's right. Well, 34 is our high score, 31 is our low currently.

We've passed both of those.

16, our new low score, very well done, Simon.

Yeah, that's a good way of thinking as well,

because it does go further back, does Federer.

Thanks very much, Richard. We're halfway through the round,

so let's take a look at those scores.

16, the best score of that pass, very well done, Simon.

Leila, keep that up, that nice, low scoring,

and you should be through comfortably to the head-to-head.

Then up to 31, Ray and Lup.

34 is where we find Ruth and Frank.

So, yes, Frank, you're not that far ahead,

but a low score will see you into the head-to-head.

So, good luck with that.

We're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, so, Leila, remember we are looking for anyone

who's been beaten by Roger Federer in a Grand Slam.

You're on 16, if you can score 17 or less, you're into the head-to-head.

OK, I'm going to go for Lleyton Hewitt.

Lleyton Hewitt, says Leila, Lleyton Hewitt.

Here is your red line, get below that with Hewitt

and the head-to-head awaits.

Let's see how many of our 100 went for Lleyton Hewitt.

Absolutely right.

Well done, you've done it, look at that, 4 for Lleyton Hewitt,

taking your total up to 20, the lowest total of this round.

That's a very good answer, Leila, well played.

He's beaten him eight times,

which is the joint most he's ever beaten anyone in a Grand Slam.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Now, Lup, it wasn't exactly like Ray

sort of got a drumroll going for you there,

but he did hint that there is a lot of Wimbledon going down!

I do like my tennis...

-Good.

-..and I know a lot of names,

but I'm not sure I want to go too risky,

in case they didn't actually play in a Grand Slam.

I'm going to play fairly safe, I think, and say Stan Wawrinka.

Stan Wawrinka, says Lup. Stan Wawrinka.

Now, ideally, you would score 2 or less with this,

to be sure of a place in the head-to-head.

Let's see how far down the column we get with Wawrinka.

There's your red line.

It's right.

Oh, look at that!

You've scored 2! 2 you needed, 2 you got.

33 is your total, very well done.

Well played, Lup. Yeah, he's beaten him five times in Grand Slams,

played loads of times. Also, they won the Davis Cup together

for Switzerland, Wawrinka and Federer.

Thank you, Richard. Now, Frank, I have grave news.

I'm afraid you are the high scorers, even before we've had your answer.

-I'm sorry.

-C'est la guerre.

Ah, c'est la guerre!

And what would you like to give us as your answer?

I'm actually going to go for Greg Rudeski.

Greg Rusedski, says Frank.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

There's no red line for you, I'm afraid,

as you are already the high scorers.

Oh, bad luck, I'm afraid that scores you 100 points,

takes your total up to 134.

I would have said that was a pretty good guess, Frank, but no,

never beaten him in a Grand Slam, never been a Federer-Rusedski game.

Now, when you said there may be a few pointless answers,

there's 150 pointless answers on this list.

-LAUGHTER

-There's an awful lot,

and there are a lot of top ten tennis players.

He has sort of played everybody, apart from Greg Rusedski,

in his career. Let's take a look at a few of the pointless answers now,

I know tennis fans will be shouting some of these at the screen.

You would have added £250 to the jackpot with Carlos Moya,

Feliciano Lopez, Gael Monfils - the Frenchman.

Grigor Dimitrov, the Bulgarian, John Isner,

Marcos Baghdatis, the Cypriot.

Mardy Fish - one of the best named tennis players - American.

Jack Sock is a slightly better named tennis player, I think.

Michael Chang, Sam Querrey, loads and loads of pointless answers.

The big scorers were Murray, Nadal, Djokovic, then Henman, Sampras,

Hewitt, Roddick, Agassi, Del Potro,

Wawrinka, Nalbandian, Goffin, Berdych,

Martin, Tsonga, Safin - those were the only people who scored at all.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So, at the end of our second round, the pair we have to say goodbye to,

with their high score of 134, I'm afraid, Ruth and Frank, it is you.

We'll see you again next time, though, and I hope you'll go

much, much further. In the meantime, thank you very much, Ruth and Frank.

But for the remaining two pairs, it's time for our head-to-head.

Well, congratulations, Ray and Lup, Leila and Simon,

you are now one step closer to the final and a chance to play

for our jackpot, which currently stands at £8,500.

Well, we've arrived at the head-to-head,

which means you're now allowed to confer.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

Well, very well done, Ray and Lup,

first appearance on the show. Very nice low scores.

It has generally fallen OK for you.

Ray, you managed to get through the tennis round,

then Lup beautifully coming in with a nice low score there.

Simon and Leila, Oh, memories of last time's 200...

Trying to suppress the memories!

..been erased, oh!

Just fabulous. Lovely low scoring there.

And here you are in the head-to-head.

This, I think, is going to be very exciting.

Best of luck to both pairs, let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here is your first question, and it concerns...

-Richard.

-Yeah, we're going to show you five pictures now

of TV shows that contain magic in them somewhere,

we just need you to identify the shows, please.

OK, let's reveal our five TV shows, and here they come.

We've got...

There we are, five magical TV shows.

Ray and Lup, you're the low scorers, so you will go first,

feel free to confer.

We... Little risk, but we think D is Charmed.

D, Charmed, say Ray and Lup, Charmed.

Now, Leila and Simon.

That board is all yours, do you want to talk us through it?

-Sure, um...

-OK, so, we think A is Game of Thrones.

B is Bewitched.

C is I Dream Of Jeannie.

E, I watched it,

I can't remember the name of it.

I think it might be The Worst Witch.

Oh, it is The Worst Witch!

Let's go for E.

-Yeah, but we don't know if it's definite...

-No, it's E.

-Worst Witch, yeah.

-You sure?

-Yeah.

-I think you're right.

-OK.

-We'll go E, The Worst Witch.

-The Worst Witch, OK.

So, we have Charmed for D, from Ray and Lup,

and The Worst Witch from Leila and Simon.

Ray and Lup said Charmed for D, let's see if it's right,

let's see how many people said it.

-No!

-Oh, not Charmed.

Good risk, but didn't pay off, I'm afraid.

Leila and Simon, meanwhile, have gone for The Worst Witch for E,

let's see if that's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

Very well done.

Down it goes, 9 for Worst Witch.

Which means, Leila and Simon, after one question,

you are up 1-0.

Yeah, well played for taking a risk, but Worst Witch,

a very good answer. D is a pointless answer, so if anyone got it at home,

you did very well. The Witches Of East End is the answer to D.

A is Game of Thrones,

that would have scored you 14.

Nice, low score.

B is Bewitched, as you say.

And C is I Dream Of Jeannie,

young Larry Hagman there.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. So, here is your second question.

Leila and Simon, you get to answer it first,

but Ray and Lup have to win it to stay in the game.

Best of luck. Our second question is all about...

Things that come in fours.

-Richard.

-We're going to show you a series of clues now,

all the answers contain the word "four" in there somewhere,

-so very best of luck.

-Thanks very much.

Let's reveal our five clues, and here they come.

I'll read those all one last time.

Leila and Simon will go first.

-OK, um...

-Go on.

Going to go for the Marvel Comics,

the Fantastic Four, please.

Fantastic Four, say Leila and Simon.

Now, Ray and Lup, it's over to you.

-Talk us through that board.

-OK.

The top one is Four Seasons, Vivaldi's Four Seasons.

And the middle one is four cheeses.

I don't know the bottom two, so...

Which one?

Let's go with...

the middle one, quattro formaggi, four cheeses.

OK, so we have the Fantastic Four versus four cheeses.

Leila and Simon said Fantastic Four, let's see if that's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right.

17.

Ray and Lup, meanwhile, have gone for the four cheeses.

Let's see if that's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

It's right.

70 for four cheeses.

Which means, Leila and Simon, very well done, after only two questions,

you're straight through to the final, 2-0.

Yeah, and the Fantastic Four was the best answer on the board as well,

so you've played a blinder in this head-to-head, very well done.

You were quite right, Quattro Stagioni is the Four Seasons.

The Channel 4 show, do you know this one?

-Four Rooms.

-Four Rooms, yeah.

And the rugby league tournament, if you had to guess...

-The Four Nations.

-The Four Nations, yeah.

-53 for that.

-Thank you very much indeed.

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

I'm afraid, Ray and Lup, our low scorers in the first two rounds,

but I'm afraid you came up against Leila and Simon in this head-to-head

and they have seen you off.

But we'll see you again next time, we look forward to that very much.

Meantime, thanks very much, Ray and Lup.

But for Leila and Simon, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Well, congratulations, Leila and Simon,

you've seen off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win

a pretty substantial Pointless jackpot.

At the moment, the jackpot is standing at £8,500.

-AUDIENCE:

-Ooh!

Really exciting, the biggest jackpot we've had for a while.

AND, I can't remember when this last happened,

a pair joined the 200 Club in Round One in one show,

then follow that up by going through

from the head-to-head 2-0 the next time they appear.

That is very impressive.

Leila, what would you like to see come up in this last round?

Um, anything '90s, Welsh football, Eurovision...

Simon, anything you want to add to that?

Music, maybe drum and bass, I might get lucky,

or basketball would go down well, or food, pretty good at that as well.

OK, well, you've covered quite a few bases there,

let's hope there's something on this board of four that

you like the look of. Today's selection is...

Think I'd go the top one.

-OK, or chemistry.

-What do you think?

Go for it, you know a lot.

Yeah, go on.

Can we go North American Sporting Achievements, please?

Now, this is a classic Pointless head-off with Leila and Simon,

because Leila, I sense you know a bit about chemistry,

Simon, you know a little bit about American sport.

Leila, you have thrown the floor open to Simon here,

so very, very best of luck.

So, you're a big basketball fan, is that the thing you said? OK.

Just remember, £8,500 up for grabs here.

Let's take a look at your three categories.

We are looking for anybody who has been inducted

into the Ice Hockey Hall Of Fame,

from the 1970s through to 2015.

We are looking for anybody who has been

the NBA's Most Valuable Player...

SIMON LAUGHS

..from 1956 all the way through to 2015.

That's basketball, by the way, in case you're wondering!

And we are also looking for anyone

who's scored 500 or more home runs in baseball,

according to the Baseball Almanac, up to March 2016, please.

So, Ice Hockey Hall Of Fame, Most Valuable Players in the NBA

and 500 or more home runs.

£8,500 up for grabs, Simon, over to you, I think, very best of luck.

-Thank you very much.

-OK, now, as always,

you've got up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win the jackpot is for just one of those answers

to be pointless. Are you ready?

-Yeah.

-OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are, your time starts now.

It's going to be Karl Malone.

Karl Malone.

-Stephen Curry?

-No, Steph Curry, no.

-That's too recent.

-OK.

-You can go for, like...

-John Stockton?

No, never won MVP.

Go for, um...

Karl Malone, Steve Nash and Chauncey Billups.

-OK.

-Those three, definitely.

-Yeah.

-Yeah? Well, stop the clock.

-Yeah, stop it, yeah.

-You sure?

-Yeah.

We could keep the clock going, you could maybe dance a bit, or...

-Sing a bit!

-No, you're happy?

-Happy, yeah.

£8,500 riding on it, you're happy, we're going to stop the clock, OK.

There we are. Let's have your three answers.

Can we go for the NBA Most Valuable Player, please?

-In all three cases?

-Yes, thanks, yeah.

-And your answers are?

-Karl Malone.

-Karl Malone.

-Yup, Steve Nash.

-Steve Nash.

-And Chauncey Billups.

And Chauncey Bill... They've just made that up!

-"Chauncey Billups"!

-He exists!

Chauncey Billups, OK.

Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

Chauncey Billups, or maybe Steve Nash.

OK, least likely to be pointless?

-Probably Karl Malone.

-Karl Malone. OK, well,

lets put those answers up on the board in that order, then,

and here they are.

We have got...

Very, very best of luck, three good answers on the board there.

Now, our jackpot, just in case you'd forgotten, is 8,500 quid,

that's a very decent jackpot to be taking away.

What would you like to do with that, Leila, if you win it?

Well, it would be an amazing Eurovision road trip!

But I'd probably, um,

I'd like to take a sledgehammer to our bathroom

and put a new bathroom in, that would be really good.

Simon?

I think we should probably go to America, watch a basketball game,

maybe go to Madison Square Garden.

The Mecca of basketball.

I think, Simon, you're probably getting a new bathroom.

Oh, I was already thinking about,

fantasising about splashbacks and stuff...

Oh, splashbacks!

-It's the dream.

-Splashbacks.

-Maybe candleholders.

-Oh, scented ones!

Oh! Posh sponge, gold dolphin taps...

You win this, your bathroom is your oyster.

OK, well, very, very best of luck.

Your first answer, Karl Malone.

In this case, we were looking for NBA Most Valuable Players.

If this is right and this is pointless, it will win you £8,500.

Let's just find out...

Karl Malone, is it right, how many people said it?

Is it pointless?

It's right.

That's the first thing it had to be.

Now, if this goes all the way down to zero,

you will leave here with £8,500.

Karl Malone takes us down through the teens, into single figures,

down it goes, still going down, still going down,

still going down, you've done it!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Karl Malone, very well done.

-Thank you.

-Superb.

Very well done.

Oh, my God!

What about that? There we are, congratulations!

Karl Malone was a pointless answer,

which means you are leaving here with that jackpot of £8,500.

Amazing, and there is one happy bathroom salesman showroom

in the Chepstow area right now.

How did you feel when you saw basketball come up?

It's your area of speciality.

-Couldn't believe it.

-I mean, it just happens sometimes, right?

It's the luck of the draw. And you took that luck and you ran

with it. Steve Nash, also a pointless answer,

it won't surprise you.

Chauncey Billups, not a pointless answer, incorrect answer.

So, blotted your copybook there(!)

We won't knock any money off, I promise you that.

Very, very well done. And Leila, very well done

for giving up chemistry and suggesting that as well.

You put your faith in Simon and it has paid off mightily.

Now, let's go through the pointless answers in the different categories.

Ice hockey first. There's pointless answers everywhere.

If you know anything about American sport,

you would have killed in this round.

Everyone who has ever been inducted into the Ice Hockey Hall Of Fame,

apart from Wayne Gretzky,

every single other name was a pointless answer.

So, very well done if you got one of those.

Now, NBA Most Valuable Players, look at some of these names here.

-Steph Curry!

-We said that.

Where else would you have gone

if you'd had to give us some more answers?

Oh...

I can't think at the moment, sorry!

You don't need to now. Hakeem Olajuwon was a pointless answer,

Julius Erving was a pointless answer, Moses Malone,

loads and loads of pointless answers there.

The biggest scorers in that round - Michael Jordan, Shaquille O'Neal,

LeBron James, Kobe Bryant, Magic Johnson, Larry Bird,

they were the only other people who scored at all,

everybody else was a pointless answer.

Let's take a look at baseball now.

Look at these names on the baseball list.

Americans, if they are watching this,

that's literally like having Beckham, Pele,

Maradona and Lionel Messi on the board.

All of those pointless answers.

Every one a pointless answer, apart from Babe Ruth,

Mark McGwire and Mickey Mantle.

So, great category. If you're sitting at home, amazing category.

Imagine standing in this studio and that category comes up.

£8,500, so well-deserved, enjoy it with our greatest compliments.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard,

and thanks once again to our winning players, Leila and Simon,

who go away with today's jackpot of £8,500.

APPLAUSE

Join us next time, when we'll be putting

more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard...

-Goodbye.

-..and it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.