Episode 9 Pointless


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Episode 9

Quiz in which contestants try to score as few points as possible by plumbing the depths of their general knowledge to come up with the answers no-one else can think of.


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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

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Thank you very much indeed.

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Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless, the show

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where the aim of the game is to find the most obscure answer possible.

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Let's meet today's players.

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And couple number one.

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Hello, I'm Sarah, this is my fabulous partner, Clare.

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We live in Nottingham but we're from

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Northumberland and Norfolk respectively.

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Couple number two.

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I'm Sandy, this is my girlfriend, Jenny, and we live in Cornwall.

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-Couple number three.

-I'm Martin, this is my beautiful wife, Kathleen,

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and we're from London.

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And finally, couple number four.

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I'm Madelyn, this is my brother, Graham, and we're from Liverpool.

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And these are today's contestants.

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Thanks very much, we'll find out more about each of you

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throughout the show as it goes along.

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So that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

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Strap yourselves in, start the ignition,

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check your blind spot, check it again,

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mirror, signal and manoeuvre, it's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

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Hiya.

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Hi, everybody. Good afternoon.

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-Good afternoon to you.

-Good afternoon.

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It's going to be a great show today, I suspect.

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We've got two returning pairs from last time,

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both of whom were rather good.

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On podium two, Sandy and Jenny, they got knocked out in Round Two,

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quite unluckily, I think.

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And on podium one, we've got Clare and Sarah,

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who got all the way through to the head-to-head,

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where they got knocked out by Dave and Jean.

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I mean, really, they got knocked out by Jean, to be fair!

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And Dave and Jean,

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-they went through to play for that massive jackpot, £9,250.

-Yeah.

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And they didn't get it. So, the jackpot keeps on getting bigger.

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It's going to be a cracking show today,

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two pairs that we've seen before, two new pairs.

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I sense Martin might be trouble. We'll find out. Maybe he's not!

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You know when you meet people beforehand, you think,

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"OK, we've got our hands full with this one"?

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I think that might be Martin.

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But lots of money up for grabs as well, some lovely questions,

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great contestants. How much fun is this going to be?

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Hard to quantify, Richard. Thanks very much.

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Now, Dave and Jean didn't win the jackpot last time,

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is basically what Richard was saying, so we add another £1,000

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to that, so today's jackpot starts off - starts off - at £10,250.

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Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

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Just to remind you,

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the pair with the highest score at the end of each round will be

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eliminated and there must be no conferring in the first two rounds.

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Our first category this afternoon

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is Places.

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Places. Can you all decide, on that basis,

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who is going to go first in your pairs and who is going to go second?

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Whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

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OK, and the question concerns...

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English Heritage sites and their counties. Oh, this has been

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-controversial in the past!

-I know. We'll discuss that, I suspect.

-Yeah.

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On each board, we'll show you the names of seven English Heritage

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sites, you need to tell us the county in which they are in, please.

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The county in which each of these are in.

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There's 14 in all, you can have a go at home. Best of luck.

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So, we got in trouble before with Burghley House,

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-when we said it was in...

-Cambridgeshire.

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Everyone said, no, it's in Lincolnshire.

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We said, no, it's in Cambridgeshire. They said, no, it's in Lincolnshire.

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Even Burghley house went, "They are right on Pointless, we really are where they are saying."

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-People were still refusing - "No, I drive past you every day..."

-They are on the county boundary.

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Oh, yeah, they are on the boundary.

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One of the gates probably is in Lincolnshire.

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But even when Burghley House were saying,

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"No, honestly, I am Burghley House and I know what county I'm in,"

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people were still going, "No, I do not think you are."

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LAUGHTER

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Let's hope none of these are on the boundaries of counties!

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-That's what I'm hoping.

-Can you imagine?

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So, we'll go with the addresses

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listed on the English Heritage website.

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I'm so glad you said that.

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We are going to go with the addresses as listed on

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the official website of English Heritage.

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-IE, where they actually are.

-OK. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

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So, we're looking for the counties in which you would find these

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English Heritage sites.

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And here is our first board of seven.

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I'll read those one last time.

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-Clare.

-Hello.

-Welcome back.

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Now, last time we saw you, you were standing, you were the golden

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couple in the head-to-head round,

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and Boston, Boston got you.

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Oh, dear. Anyway, we're back,

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it's a new day and the jackpot's got a little bit bigger, so tactically,

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you've done something fantastic.

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-Which is quite nice, yeah.

-I think it is.

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-Remind us what you do, Clare.

-I'm a student, a social work student.

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-A social work student.

-I am.

-About to embark on a course at Nottingham?

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-Yeah, a degree.

-A degree course.

-At Nottingham University.

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-How long will that take? Three years?

-Three years.

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-It's quite nice, that. Are you looking forward to it?

-I am.

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-So, that's a new venture.

-Yeah!

-Get lots of holidays off.

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Brilliant, well, good luck with that and good luck with this.

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So, in which counties would you find these English Heritage sites?

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I could go for an obvious one...

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-Now, I'm going to talk to you about Pointless... Um...

-I know!

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But I could get 100 if I get it wrong.

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Framlingham Castle, I believe, is in Suffolk.

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Suffolk. Suffolk, says Clare.

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Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people said Suffolk.

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Very well done indeed, Clare, that was worth it, I think.

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Down it goes...

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That's a great answer, 16, well done.

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What a start to the round, 16. APPLAUSE

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Absolutely right to take the risk, Clare, well played.

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It's in Suffolk. It's in Framlingham, more specifically.

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-Thank you, Richard. Now, Jenny, welcome back.

-Hello.

-Welcome back.

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-From Newquay in Cornwall?

-Yes, correct.

-Wonderful.

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Remind us what you do down there.

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I work as a wildlife tour guide on boat trips out of Padstow.

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What's the most exciting wildlife you have round there?

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We see grey seals on pretty much every trip,

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they're quite kind of creatures of habit,

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they hang around the same kind of places.

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They look like little labradors, don't they?

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The little heads peeping up.

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We see dolphins quite regularly, common dolphins,

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sometimes bottlenose, I've seen Risso's dolphins...

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You see, she really does know her marine life there.

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All these different types of dolphin!

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-I would hope that she does, though, to be fair.

-Just doing my job, so...

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Well, yeah, I know, but what I'm saying is, she's demonstrating.

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-What, the fact that someone can name more than one type of dolphin?

-Yes!

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-Suddenly, you are in thrall!

-I am!

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Easily impressed, I like that in a man.

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I think it's... I think...

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It doesn't take a lot to impress me, but there you are.

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What would you like to go for on this board?

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-English counties are awful for me.

-You live in one!

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-I know Scotland and I know Cornwall. So, thankfully...

-I see. Oh, good.

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..I'm seeing something up there that pleases me,

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so I'm going to go for the third one down and say Cornwall.

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-You're going to say Launceston Castle and Cornwall.

-Yes.

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Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people said it, too.

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It's right.

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36, not bad.

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APPLAUSE

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Not bad.

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Yeah, it used to be a prison, Launceston Castle.

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The founder of the Quakers, George Fox, was once held there.

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Thanks very much indeed.

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Martin, welcome to Pointless. Good to have you here. From South London?

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-Correct.

-And what do you do, Martin?

-I'm a commodity broker.

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Do you trade in pork bellies and orange juice?

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I don't, I trade in cocoa, coffee, sugar, wheat and other things,

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you know, such as stocks and shares, financials, you name it,

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-I'll trade it.

-So, absolutely anything.

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What was your best day ever? If that's not really vulgar question!

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What were the excitements of a really good day?

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Well, when you make money, that's always a good day.

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-OK, there we are!

-Very good day, that is.

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Martin, what are your interests these days?

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Well, I run a karate class, I'm a black belt second dan,

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-I'm still doing it, even at my age.

-That's impressive.

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-How often do you do that, daily?

-No, a couple of times a week.

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That's good enough.

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Now, Martin, what would you like to go for on this board?

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Well, English counties are not really my field.

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I'm going to take a long shot and go for Iron Bridge, Shropshire.

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OK, Martin's long shot, Shropshire. Let's see if that's right

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and how many of our 100 people said Shropshire.

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It's right. 36 is our highest score.

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You've passed that.

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30, your score for Shropshire. APPLAUSE

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Yeah, the world's first iron bridge, I learned about that at O-level.

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So, there we are.

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Now, Graham, welcome to Pointless, great to have you.

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You're from Liverpool. What do you do, Graham?

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I'm a legal accounts assistant.

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-Right, how long have you done that for?

-Eight years now, I think.

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-Eight years?

-Mm.

-And what do you do in your spare time?

-Sport, mainly.

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I play five-a-side twice a week,

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-I also play tennis and snooker as well.

-Very good.

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Now, Graham, this is your board, you can go through that and

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fill in all the blanks for us, if you like.

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How are you feeling about it?

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So-so.

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Um, I think I'm going to go for the last one,

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which I believe is East Sussex.

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East Sussex for the 1066 Battle of Hastings Abbey and Battlefield.

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East Sussex, let's see if that's right and how many of

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our 100 people said East Sussex.

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51. 51 for East Sussex. APPLAUSE

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Well played, Graham. Let's fill in the rest of this board.

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-Stonehenge...

-Is Wiltshire.

-..is Wiltshire.

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-55 points for that. Lindisfarne...

-Northumberland.

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That's your neck of the woods. 34 points for that. And Dover Castle...

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-Kent.

-Kent, that's the biggest score of 76, so, Clare, Suffolk is

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-the best answer on that board, very well played.

-I am impressed!

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Thanks very much indeed.

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We're halfway through the round, let's take a look at those scores.

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Well done, 16, Clare, the best score of the pass.

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Then we travel up to 30, where we find Martin and Kathleen.

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36, Jenny and Sandy. Then up to 51, where we find Graham and Madelyn.

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So, yes, you're not miles ahead, Madelyn,

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but a nice low score from you will keep you in the game.

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We are going to come back down the line now.

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Could the second players please step up to the podium?

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So, let's put seven more English Heritage sites up on the board,

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and here they come.

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I'm going to read those all again.

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OK, now, Madelyn, welcome here from Liverpool.

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What do you do, Madelyn?

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I'm a mental health practitioner in a community mental health team.

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And how long have you been doing that for?

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Coming up to five years now, so quite a long time, my longest job.

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And what are your hobbies, Madelyn?

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I've got a little dog, who I have to walk every day.

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She's lovely, she's a pug and beagle, a puggle.

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-A puggle?

-Puggle, yeah.

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Would you say, tends more pug, or tends more beagle?

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Um, more pug, I'd say.

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She's quite small and she's got a little cute face.

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Does she disappear if you take her for a walk, if she's not on a lead?

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-She did use to, but I've managed to train her to an OK-ish level.

-Good.

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Now, you're on 51, you are the highest scorers,

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but you've got a lovely new board here, Madelyn.

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What would you like to go for? A nice low score should keep you in.

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Well, unfortunately,

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I've only actually heard of one of those answers.

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I think it would be a pretty high answer,

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so I'm going to have to take a bit of

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a risk and go for Ambleside Roman Fort, and I'm going to say Cumbria.

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Cumbria. No red line for you because you are the highest scorers.

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Let's see how many people said Cumbria for Ambleside Roman Fort.

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It's right, that was a good punt.

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41 for Cumbria. APPLAUSE

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92 is your total.

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-Could be enough to keep you in the game there.

-Well played, Madelyn.

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Thought to have been built during Emperor Hadrian's reign.

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Thanks very much, Richard. Now, Kathleen, welcome.

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-Welcome to the show. What do you do, Kathleen?

-I'm an image consultant.

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Image consultant? For individuals?

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Mostly women, I help them, give them a bit of advice on how to

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-look and how that impacts on their confidence.

-That's fun.

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Do you actually take them off shopping?

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Yeah, shopping trips, I look through people's wardrobes,

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I do all the fun things.

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-I've created the most fantastic job for myself.

-It sounds enormous fun.

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-Do people enjoy it?

-I love every single thing about it.

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-Are you very candid?

-Um, yeah, I use my words very carefully.

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-I'm everybody's best friend.

-Have you broken anyone down to tears?

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-No, not yet!

-OK.

-That could be something to aim for...

-Martin?

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You can see, I let my husband dress himself.

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LAUGHTER

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Maybe people are moved to tears by what you've done for them.

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-That's one other way of looking at it, yeah.

-There we go.

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Now, you're on 30, great low score from Martin on the first pass.

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-If you can score 61 or less, you're into the next round.

-OK, um...

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The one I'm looking at is quite near where we live, actually, because

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Martin said we live in South London, but we actually live in East London.

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I think it's nerves.

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LAUGHTER

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It's East London! OK.

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Um, I'm going to go for Audley End, Essex.

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Essex for Audley End, says Kathleen. Here is your red line.

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Nice and high. If you get below that,

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you're through to the next round.

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How many of our 100 people said Essex?

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Very well done, good enough.

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36. APPLAUSE

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66 is your total, and you're through.

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Nicely played, Kathleen, absolutely,

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it's one of those ones that is also quite near Cambridgeshire.

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But not close enough that we're going to get in trouble!

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Thank you very much indeed. Now, Sandy, welcome back.

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-Remind us what you do, Sandy.

-I'm a beach lifeguard in Cornwall.

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A beach lifeguard in Cornwall. And you're originally from Glasgow?

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-Indeed.

-What actually was it that brought you down to Cornwall?

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I did some summer jobs just outside Newquay and got into surfing,

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liked the beach more than the office, to be honest.

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-And liked the people, I'm guessing.

-Yeah, absolutely.

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-They're very nice people down there, aren't they?

-Yeah.

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-No, it's fantastic. I love it.

-OK.

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OK. Now, Sandy, 36 is your score at the moment,

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92 is still the high score.

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55 or less gets you through.

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Well, talking about coming on the show, you know,

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the one thing you don't want to come up...

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-English counties.

-There we go, eh?

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-Aw.

-So, erm, I'm not 100%.

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I'm going to have to go for one I think's quite easy.

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Hopefully it's long enough.

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And say Glastonbury

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and say Somerset.

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OK.

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Glastonbury Tribunal, Somerset.

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There is your red line.

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You have to get below that red line with Somerset.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

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It's right.

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And you're through.

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Just. 50.

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Needed 55, got 50.

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86 is your total. You're into Round Two.

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Well played, Sandy. Built in the 15th century,

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thought to have been the courthouse of Glastonbury Abbey -

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now it's a Tourist Information Centre, amongst other things.

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You'd think they'd know, from 15th century?

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-Yeah. Could have been a courthouse. Could have been...

-Probably was.

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-Could've been a Spar.

-Yeah.

0:16:110:16:14

Who knows? Who knows what it was? Lost in the mists of time.

0:16:140:16:18

Thank you very much.

0:16:180:16:20

-Now, Sarah.

-Hello.

-Welcome back, Sarah.

0:16:200:16:23

Lovely thing we've learned about Sarah

0:16:230:16:25

that we didn't know last time - Sarah's from Northumberland.

0:16:250:16:28

-Yes, I am.

-Aw!

0:16:280:16:29

That's lovely. Whereabouts?

0:16:290:16:30

Place called Amble. Amble-by-the-Sea.

0:16:300:16:33

Amble. Yeah, I love Northumberland.

0:16:330:16:35

It's where I'm from, you know.

0:16:350:16:36

I know. All the best people are.

0:16:360:16:38

-Yes. Yes.

-Well, I say that - I'm from Essex.

-Well, that's true.

0:16:380:16:41

Yeah. Now, then, Sarah.

0:16:410:16:43

Remind us what you do.

0:16:430:16:45

I work at the University of Nottingham

0:16:450:16:47

as a disability adviser.

0:16:470:16:48

That's right. And...

0:16:480:16:49

So tell us what you are going to plan this year

0:16:490:16:52

with your new VW camper van.

0:16:520:16:53

We discovered all about this last time.

0:16:530:16:55

The first thing we're going to do is,

0:16:550:16:57

we've got the Isle of Wight Festival booked,

0:16:570:16:59

but just generally enjoy getting out and about

0:16:590:17:03

and just making the most of the countryside.

0:17:030:17:06

Talking of making the most of the countryside,

0:17:060:17:08

we have wonderful places to visit all over this board.

0:17:080:17:11

Four unanswered ones.

0:17:110:17:12

If you wanted, you could go through all of them.

0:17:120:17:14

There's two I know on there.

0:17:140:17:15

I know the one that's got the initials IOW is Isle of Wight.

0:17:150:17:18

But I'm not for that,

0:17:180:17:20

I'm going to go for one that's quite near us in Nottingham,

0:17:200:17:23

that's Bolsover Castle, which I believe is in Derbyshire.

0:17:230:17:26

Bolsover Castle in Derbyshire, says Sarah.

0:17:260:17:29

Lovely low score from Clare in the first pass,

0:17:290:17:31

which means you only have to score 75 or less

0:17:310:17:33

to be through to the next round.

0:17:330:17:35

Your red line three quarters of the way up the column.

0:17:350:17:38

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Derbyshire for Bolsover Castle.

0:17:380:17:41

It's right.

0:17:430:17:45

And you're through! Very well done.

0:17:450:17:46

Another great answer.

0:17:480:17:49

Look at that. 18!

0:17:490:17:51

Very well done indeed. 34.

0:17:510:17:54

Very well done.

0:17:550:17:57

Well played, Sarah.

0:17:570:17:58

Of course you're right about Isle of Wight for Osborne House as well.

0:17:580:18:01

It's a bigger scorer, though,

0:18:010:18:03

so Bolsover Castle a better answer to go for.

0:18:030:18:05

64 there for the Isle of Wight.

0:18:050:18:07

Berney Arms Windmill.

0:18:070:18:08

-I'm going to guess Norfolk.

-It is in Norfolk, yes.

0:18:080:18:10

21 points for that. Wrest Park is difficult

0:18:100:18:12

if you don't know it, because lots of English counties begin with B.

0:18:120:18:15

-Yeah.

-And this one is Bedfordshire.

0:18:150:18:17

Very well done if you said that,

0:18:170:18:19

would've scored 7 points

0:18:190:18:20

and it's the best answer on the board.

0:18:200:18:22

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. So, at the end of our first round,

0:18:220:18:25

the pair who are heading home with...

0:18:250:18:26

It's not that high a score,

0:18:260:18:28

but I'm afraid it just is our highest score.

0:18:280:18:30

Madelyn and Graham. I'm so sorry -

0:18:300:18:32

92 somehow seems to be the number we have to send you home with today.

0:18:320:18:35

But we'll see you again next time,

0:18:350:18:36

look forward to that very much indeed.

0:18:360:18:38

In the meantime, thanks very much,

0:18:380:18:39

-Madelyn and Graham.

-Thank you.

0:18:390:18:41

But, for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

0:18:410:18:44

So now we're down to three pairs.

0:18:490:18:50

Obviously, at the end of this round,

0:18:500:18:52

we'll have to say goodbye to another pair.

0:18:520:18:55

Our category for Round Two this afternoon is Words.

0:18:550:18:57

It's a Words round.

0:18:570:18:59

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

0:18:590:19:01

who's going to go second.

0:19:010:19:03

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

0:19:030:19:06

OK, let's find out what the question is.

0:19:080:19:10

Here it comes.

0:19:100:19:12

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name...

0:19:120:19:15

as many words ending in "CLE"

0:19:150:19:18

as they could.

0:19:180:19:20

CLE. Richard.

0:19:200:19:22

Yes, we're looking for any word

0:19:220:19:23

that features on the British and World English section

0:19:230:19:26

of oxforddictionaries.com, as of December 2015,

0:19:260:19:29

that ends "CLE", please.

0:19:290:19:31

Thank you very much indeed.

0:19:320:19:34

-So, Sarah.

-Hello.

0:19:340:19:36

Words ending "CLE".

0:19:360:19:39

Yes. I can think of quite a few,

0:19:390:19:42

but I'm going to go for carbuncle.

0:19:420:19:45

Oh, that's a good one.

0:19:450:19:47

That's a good one. Carbuncle.

0:19:470:19:49

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

0:19:490:19:52

Still going down.

0:19:590:20:00

Still going down.

0:20:000:20:01

Look at that - 15. Very well done, Sarah.

0:20:010:20:03

Very well done.

0:20:050:20:06

It's an abscess or boil in the skin, a carbuncle.

0:20:080:20:10

-It's a much nicer word than it is a thing.

-Yes.

0:20:100:20:13

There we are. OK. Now, Sandy, we're looking for any word ending "CLE".

0:20:130:20:18

OK, I've got a few in my head.

0:20:180:20:20

I've got a pretty good one, but I think it might be hyphenated.

0:20:210:20:24

-That would make it a bad one.

-Yeah, I know.

0:20:240:20:27

-So I'm not going to go for that.

-Oh, but it might be brilliant!

0:20:270:20:30

I'll be lucky if I get a correct one.

0:20:300:20:32

-OK.

-So I'm going to go for particle.

0:20:320:20:35

You're going to go for particle.

0:20:350:20:37

Particle says Sandy.

0:20:370:20:38

Let's see how many of our 100 people went with that.

0:20:380:20:41

Phew.

0:20:440:20:45

Oh.

0:20:450:20:47

15 again.

0:20:500:20:51

Look at that - 15.

0:20:510:20:52

Seems to be a very popular stopping-off place

0:20:520:20:54

for this column here.

0:20:540:20:56

15-15. It's like a game of tennis, isn't it?

0:20:560:20:58

A minute portion of matter.

0:20:580:21:00

Thank you very much, Richard.

0:21:000:21:02

Now, Martin.

0:21:020:21:04

Right. Erm, again, words are not my field, really.

0:21:040:21:07

But, erm, I'm going to have a little go.

0:21:070:21:10

Words are not your field?!

0:21:100:21:12

I've heard it all now.

0:21:120:21:15

Unicycle.

0:21:150:21:17

Unicycle says Martin.

0:21:170:21:20

OK, let's see how many of our 100 people said unicycle.

0:21:200:21:24

13. You've broken through.

0:21:320:21:34

Broken through from 15.

0:21:340:21:38

Yeah, well played, Martin.

0:21:380:21:40

Obviously a one-wheeled means of perambulation.

0:21:400:21:44

Yeah. Means of...

0:21:440:21:46

Something that... Other words that I'm not going to be able to say.

0:21:460:21:49

There we go. Thank you very much, Richard.

0:21:490:21:51

We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at those scores.

0:21:510:21:54

Only two scores between the three teams.

0:21:540:21:56

Martin and Kathleen are on 13

0:21:560:21:57

thanks to Martin's wonderful unicycle there.

0:21:570:21:59

And Sandy and Jenny, and Sarah and Clare,

0:21:590:22:02

are alike on 15.

0:22:020:22:03

So there we are. We're going to come back down the line now,

0:22:030:22:06

can the second players please step up to the podium?

0:22:060:22:08

All right. Kathleen.

0:22:110:22:13

We're looking for words ending "CLE".

0:22:130:22:16

Words ARE my thing.

0:22:160:22:18

I think Martin meant numbers were his thing, words are my thing.

0:22:180:22:22

We complement each other.

0:22:220:22:23

Good.

0:22:230:22:26

I'm going to go for a long shot, I think I know it.

0:22:260:22:29

I'm going to apologise to my daughter, who's an English student.

0:22:290:22:33

-Ventricle.

-Ventricle, says Kathleen.

0:22:330:22:36

Ventricle.

0:22:360:22:38

OK. Here is your red line. I mean, there it is.

0:22:380:22:42

Essentially, to avoid becoming the new high-scorers,

0:22:420:22:45

you have to score 1 or less.

0:22:450:22:46

Let's see how many of our 100 people said ventricle.

0:22:460:22:49

It's right.

0:22:520:22:53

It's 1.

0:22:590:23:00

You needed to score 1, you did score 1.

0:23:000:23:03

Your total is 14.

0:23:030:23:04

You are in the head-to-head round.

0:23:040:23:06

Very well played, Kathleen. Yeah, the ventricle,

0:23:060:23:09

the two main chambers of the heart are the ventricles.

0:23:090:23:12

Also, if you sit under the air-conditioning unit at work,

0:23:120:23:14

you know sometimes you get dripped on?

0:23:140:23:16

That's a ventricle. That's the same thing.

0:23:160:23:19

Thank you, Richard.

0:23:190:23:21

Jenny.

0:23:210:23:22

-Yeah.

-Jenny. Just as low

0:23:220:23:24

as it can possibly be.

0:23:240:23:26

There's no target particularly for you,

0:23:260:23:28

-as you're joint high-scorers.

-Do my best.

0:23:280:23:30

I'm going to, erm...

0:23:300:23:32

-Go marine.

-Good.

-As expected.

0:23:320:23:35

And I'm going to go with tentacle.

0:23:350:23:37

As you should. Tentacle, says Jenny.

0:23:390:23:41

No red line, as I say.

0:23:410:23:42

Just let's see how far down the column we get with tentacle.

0:23:420:23:45

It's a good one! Look at that, 5.

0:23:550:23:56

Very well done indeed. 5, taking your total up to 20.

0:23:560:23:59

Very nicely played, Jenny.

0:24:010:24:03

-Going to be tense on that first podium now, isn't it?

-Oh, they are.

0:24:030:24:06

They are. But if anyone can do it under pressure, I think Clare can.

0:24:060:24:10

Now, Clare, words ending "CLE".

0:24:100:24:13

I'm going to carry on with the bike theme.

0:24:140:24:16

-Mm-hm.

-And go tricycle.

0:24:160:24:19

Tricycle. OK, tricycle.

0:24:190:24:22

Let's find out how many of our 100 people said tricycle.

0:24:220:24:24

There is your red line right down at the bottom there.

0:24:240:24:28

4 or less is your target.

0:24:280:24:29

Oh, no!

0:24:380:24:39

28.

0:24:390:24:40

28?!

0:24:400:24:43

28?!

0:24:450:24:46

Unicycle 13, tricycle 28?!

0:24:460:24:49

That doesn't make any sense at all.

0:24:490:24:50

Anyway, there we are. 28, and it takes your total up to 43.

0:24:500:24:54

I think maybe cos it rhymes with bicycle,

0:24:540:24:55

so once you've thought, "Bicycle,"

0:24:550:24:57

you go, "Bicycle, tricycle," and then you kind of...

0:24:570:25:00

Unicycle is a little bit further on the list. Do you have an answer?

0:25:000:25:03

Well, I do. But I don't know if it's a word now.

0:25:030:25:05

I think there's a word pentacle.

0:25:050:25:07

P-E-N-T-A-C-L-E, I think.

0:25:070:25:10

-Pentacle?

-Oh, even now I've realised I've made it up.

0:25:100:25:14

1 point.

0:25:140:25:15

Yay!

0:25:150:25:16

-Well done.

-Oh, good. Good.

-Very nicely played.

0:25:160:25:20

But let's take a look at some of the pointless answers - plenty of them.

0:25:200:25:23

-You could have had astroparticle.

-Oh, there's canticle.

0:25:230:25:27

Sandy, that would have been ballsy

0:25:270:25:28

if you'd said that. That's a great answer.

0:25:280:25:30

Auricle, which is the outside bit of your ear. Canticle...

0:25:300:25:33

That's what I should have gone for.

0:25:330:25:35

Curricle, encircle is a pointless answer.

0:25:350:25:39

Monocycle would have been a terrific answer, it's a pointless one.

0:25:390:25:43

Outmuscle is a pointless answer, subcuticle and upcycle,

0:25:430:25:47

which is this fashionable thing now of making old furniture,

0:25:470:25:50

kind of revamping it. They call it upcycling.

0:25:500:25:52

Let's take a look at the top three answers,

0:25:520:25:54

the ones that most of our 100 people said when we asked them.

0:25:540:25:57

Uncle Bicycle Icicle would be a good name for a kids' book.

0:26:040:26:07

-Wouldn't it?

-Wouldn't it? Uncle Bicycle Icicle. Write it!

0:26:070:26:11

Quickly, write it!

0:26:110:26:12

Finished. LAUGHTER

0:26:120:26:14

Just find an illustrator and you're off.

0:26:140:26:17

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. So, at the end of our second round,

0:26:170:26:20

the pair we're saying goodbye to, I can't bear this,

0:26:200:26:22

it's Clare and Sarah, who were our golden couple last time.

0:26:220:26:25

I'm so sorry. You've been so strong the whole way through,

0:26:250:26:28

but I'm afraid this is where we say goodbye.

0:26:280:26:30

It's been wonderful having you on the show.

0:26:300:26:31

Thank you so much for playing, Clare and Sarah.

0:26:310:26:34

Right, for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

0:26:370:26:40

Many congratulations, Kathleen and Martin, Sandy and Jenny,

0:26:450:26:48

you are now within touching distance of the final

0:26:480:26:50

and a chance to play for our jackpot,

0:26:500:26:52

which currently stands at...

0:26:520:26:55

Well, here you are and the best thing about this stage of the game

0:26:590:27:02

and onwards is that you're allowed to confer.

0:27:020:27:04

You can start playing as a team, which is wonderful.

0:27:040:27:07

In this case, the first pair to win two questions

0:27:070:27:09

will be playing for that jackpot.

0:27:090:27:11

Also, Martin, it means if any subject comes up that happens

0:27:110:27:14

not to be your field, you can pass it over to Kathleen,

0:27:140:27:17

which is fantastic.

0:27:170:27:20

Sandy and Jenny, very well done.

0:27:200:27:22

Lovely to have you here in the head-to-head.

0:27:220:27:23

Very best of luck to both pairs.

0:27:230:27:25

Let us not forget that humungous five-figure jackpot there

0:27:250:27:29

that is possibly waiting for one pair.

0:27:290:27:31

Let's play the head-to-head.

0:27:310:27:32

OK, here comes your first question

0:27:380:27:40

and our first question this afternoon is all about...

0:27:400:27:43

-Oh, good!

-It's Chickens. Richard.

0:27:430:27:46

Yeah, five clues now to facts about Chickens.

0:27:460:27:48

I know they normally call them "the dolphins of the land", don't they?

0:27:480:27:51

Whoever gives us the most obscure answer is going to score a point.

0:27:510:27:54

Thanks very much indeed.

0:27:540:27:56

OK, let's reveal our five clues, our Chicken clues and here they are.

0:27:560:27:59

I'm going to read those one last time.

0:28:290:28:31

Now, Kathleen and Martin, you're our low scorers

0:28:530:28:56

throughout the show so far so you will go first.

0:28:560:28:58

I'll leave it to you, my darling.

0:28:580:29:00

Erm...

0:29:000:29:02

I think I know two.

0:29:020:29:04

I'm not sure on the second one

0:29:040:29:06

so I'm going to go for the one

0:29:060:29:08

I'm most sure of.

0:29:080:29:09

Do you have any input, Mart?

0:29:090:29:10

-Go for it!

-LAUGHTER

0:29:100:29:13

Invaluable, Martin.

0:29:140:29:15

I'm going to go for satirical TV puppet show

0:29:170:29:22

and it is Spitting Image.

0:29:220:29:24

Spitting Image say Kathleen and Martin. Well, Kathleen.

0:29:240:29:27

Sandy and Jenny, that board's all yours.

0:29:290:29:31

Do you want to talk us through it?

0:29:310:29:33

-Jenny.

-LAUGHTER

0:29:330:29:36

The first one - no clue.

0:29:360:29:38

The second one - I would imagine Virginia.

0:29:380:29:42

Coronation chicken - Elizabeth II.

0:29:440:29:46

I'm going to go for the bottom one,

0:29:460:29:48

I think it's Robin Hood.

0:29:480:29:50

Robin Hood. OK, so we have Spitting Image and we have Robin Hood.

0:29:500:29:55

Kathleen and Martin went for Spitting Image.

0:29:550:29:57

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

0:29:570:30:01

42. Now, then, Sandy and Jenny have gone for Robin Hood.

0:30:140:30:17

Let's see if that's right,

0:30:170:30:18

let's see how many of our 100 people have said Robin Hood.

0:30:180:30:21

It's right.

0:30:240:30:25

Is it... Yes, it is going to beat 42. Down it goes.

0:30:270:30:29

Look at that, 19 for Robin Hood!

0:30:290:30:31

Very well done, Sandy and Jenny.

0:30:310:30:34

-After one question, you are up 1-0.

-Well played.

0:30:340:30:37

Let's fill in the rest of this board.

0:30:370:30:39

-The US TV series...

-Breaking Bad.

-Is Breaking Bad.

0:30:390:30:42

It would have scored you 20 points.

0:30:420:30:44

The chicken breed, it's not Virginia - it's Plymouth Rock.

0:30:440:30:47

Oh, right, of course.

0:30:470:30:48

And that would have scored you four points

0:30:480:30:50

and coronation chicken was created... Obviously Elizabeth II.

0:30:500:30:53

What do you think that would have scored?

0:30:530:30:54

Erm, 92.

0:30:540:30:56

Ha, you wish. Let's take a look.

0:30:560:30:58

It would have scored you 58.

0:30:580:31:01

There we are, OK. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

0:31:010:31:05

Here comes your second question.

0:31:050:31:06

Now, then, Kathleen and Martin,

0:31:060:31:08

you have to win this one to stay in the game.

0:31:080:31:10

But Sandy and Jenny get to answer it first. Best of luck. It concerns...

0:31:100:31:14

Superhero Actors, Richard.

0:31:170:31:19

We're going to give you the names now of five pairs of actors,

0:31:190:31:21

all of whom have played the same superhero.

0:31:210:31:23

Can you tell us who the superhero is, please?

0:31:230:31:25

I'm going to give you the dates they first played them as well.

0:31:250:31:28

OK, lets reveal our five pairs of actors and here they come.

0:31:280:31:31

I'm going to read those all one last time.

0:31:510:31:53

Sandy and Jenny will go first.

0:32:020:32:05

OK. I know all of them,

0:32:070:32:09

but it's just which one's lowest.

0:32:090:32:11

Erm, I think we're going to go for the middle one

0:32:120:32:14

and say Captain America.

0:32:140:32:17

Captain America for Matt Salinger and Chris Evans.

0:32:170:32:20

Captain America.

0:32:200:32:22

Now, Kathleen and Martin,

0:32:220:32:24

-do you want to take us through the rest of the board?

-I think she does.

0:32:240:32:27

Well, that was the only one I didn't know, actually,

0:32:270:32:29

so Batman, Catwoman,

0:32:290:32:32

Superman, Spider-Man.

0:32:320:32:34

I'm going to go for Spider-Man -

0:32:340:32:36

Tobey Maguire and Andrew Garfield.

0:32:360:32:39

OK, the bottom one, you're going to say Spider-Man.

0:32:390:32:41

So we have Captain America and we have Spider-Man.

0:32:410:32:44

Sandy and Jenny said Captain America.

0:32:440:32:46

Let's see if that is right for Matt Salinger and Chris Evans.

0:32:460:32:49

It is right.

0:32:520:32:53

How far down the column will we end up?

0:32:550:32:57

Oh, that's a brilliant answer!

0:32:580:33:00

3, very well done indeed.

0:33:000:33:01

3 for Captain America.

0:33:010:33:03

Meanwhile, Kathleen and Martin have gone for Spider-Man.

0:33:060:33:09

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many people said that

0:33:090:33:12

for Tobey Maguire and Andrew Garfield.

0:33:120:33:14

It's right. It's got a long way to go.

0:33:170:33:20

It's still going down.

0:33:200:33:22

34.

0:33:220:33:23

34, which means very, very well done indeed, Sandy and Jenny.

0:33:260:33:29

After only two questions, you are through to the final 2-0.

0:33:290:33:32

Very well played.

0:33:320:33:33

Nothing you could have done to beat Captain America,

0:33:330:33:35

very much the best answer on the board.

0:33:350:33:37

-Whoa, there you go.

-How about that?

0:33:540:33:56

That's the score that I thought coronation chicken was going to get.

0:33:560:33:59

You'd have thought so!

0:33:590:34:00

Christopher Reeve much more famous than Queen Elizabeth II.

0:34:000:34:04

There you are, there you are. Thank you very much.

0:34:040:34:06

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

0:34:060:34:09

I'm afraid it's Kathleen and Martin.

0:34:090:34:11

Just not enough things your field, Martin, I think.

0:34:110:34:13

But we will get to see you again next time.

0:34:130:34:16

We'll look forward to that very much indeed.

0:34:160:34:18

Meantime, thanks very much, Kathleen and Martin.

0:34:180:34:20

But for Sandy and Jenny, it's now time for our Pointless final.

0:34:240:34:27

Congratulations, Sandy and Jenny! You've seen off all the competition

0:34:310:34:34

-and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

-Yes!

0:34:340:34:37

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

0:34:430:34:46

At the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at...

0:34:460:34:49

Well, I say you'd earned your place here, I mean,

0:34:550:34:57

for heaven's sake, we started off with English Heritage Sites,

0:34:570:35:01

then we had Words Ending "CLE",

0:35:010:35:03

then we had Chickens, then we had Superhero Actors

0:35:030:35:06

and, you know, here you are, you've come out on top.

0:35:060:35:09

So, what would you love to see come up?

0:35:090:35:12

Ooh, Disney for Jenny. Marine mammals.

0:35:120:35:14

Marine mammals would be perfect.

0:35:140:35:17

Famous surfers, that'd be good. World champion surfers, maybe?

0:35:170:35:20

Well, you never know. You never know in these last rounds.

0:35:200:35:23

They can be quite niche sometimes, but, anyway, the very best of luck.

0:35:230:35:26

Really lovely big jackpot there and you do deserve it

0:35:260:35:29

so let's hope there's something up on the board

0:35:290:35:31

-you like the look of.

-Fingers crossed.

0:35:310:35:33

Today's selection of categories reads like this - we have got...

0:35:330:35:36

-I used to be a big Monty Python fan, but...

-So are a lot of people.

0:35:450:35:51

A lot of people are.

0:35:510:35:52

-Asian Geography - you've been to Asia, right?

-Yep.

0:35:520:35:56

-I mean, is that going to be a good one, Asian Geography?

-Maybe.

0:35:560:36:01

What do you reckon? Flip a coin?

0:36:010:36:03

We've got to go for Asian Geography, don't we, really?

0:36:030:36:05

-Yep, let's do it.

-Right, Asian Geography, come on.

0:36:050:36:08

-Asian Geography it is. Richard.

-OK, very, very best of luck.

0:36:080:36:11

Huge jackpot here, three very different questions.

0:36:110:36:14

We are looking for any of the state capitals of India,

0:36:140:36:18

the capitals of any of the 29 states

0:36:180:36:20

or the seven union territories of India.

0:36:200:36:24

We're looking for the capital city of any landlocked Asian country

0:36:240:36:27

so any landlocked Asian country,

0:36:270:36:29

we're looking for its capital city, please,

0:36:290:36:32

or any currencies of countries that border China.

0:36:320:36:36

As always, by country,

0:36:360:36:37

we mean a sovereign state that's a member of the UN in its own right.

0:36:370:36:40

So those state capitals of India,

0:36:400:36:42

capital cities of landlocked Asian countries

0:36:420:36:44

or currencies of countries that border China -

0:36:440:36:47

very, very best of luck.

0:36:470:36:48

Thanks very much indeed. Now, as always,

0:36:480:36:50

you've got up to a minute to come up with three answers.

0:36:500:36:53

All you need to win that jackpot

0:36:530:36:54

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

0:36:540:36:56

-Are you ready?

-Yep.

-As we'll ever be!

-OK.

0:36:560:36:59

Let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

0:36:590:37:01

There they are. Your time starts now.

0:37:010:37:03

Right, state capitals of India?

0:37:040:37:06

Kaipur, is that one?

0:37:060:37:09

-Delhi is a very big one.

-Jaipur.

0:37:090:37:13

Jaipur - it's a dish at least, anyway, yeah. Mumbai...

0:37:130:37:18

-What's in Goa?

-I don't know.

0:37:180:37:19

-Capital cities of landlocked countries.

-Do you know any?

0:37:190:37:22

What's the capital of Laos?

0:37:220:37:24

-Er...

-The capital of Mongolia.

0:37:240:37:27

-Erm...

-The capital of Nepal?

0:37:270:37:29

-Kathmandu.

-Kathmandu.

-Erm...

-That's a good one.

0:37:290:37:33

Erm... Currencies, I don't know.

0:37:330:37:36

Currencies, it's the rupee in India.

0:37:360:37:41

Russia borders it.

0:37:410:37:42

Which countries border China?

0:37:420:37:45

I don't even know.

0:37:450:37:46

Capital cities of landlocked countries, erm...

0:37:460:37:50

-Oh, my God!

-Ten seconds left.

0:37:500:37:53

There aren't too many Asian landlocked countries.

0:37:530:37:56

No, I'm struggling. Oh...

0:37:560:37:59

What will we say for India?

0:37:590:38:02

OK, that is your time up, I'm afraid.

0:38:020:38:05

I now need your three answers.

0:38:050:38:08

-Kathmandu, category capital cities of landlocked countries.

-OK.

0:38:080:38:13

State capitals of India - erm, Kaipur.

0:38:130:38:18

-Is that a place?

-Do you want that to be an answer?

-Go on, then.

-Kaipur.

0:38:180:38:22

And Bengal, is that one? That's a place, isn't it?

0:38:220:38:26

-Bengal.

-Bengal, and that again is a state capital of India?

0:38:260:38:30

Total guess. Yeah, yeah.

0:38:300:38:32

So, we have Kathmandu and we have Kaipur and we have Bengal.

0:38:320:38:37

Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

0:38:370:38:40

We think Kaipur's right so let's have a right one at the end.

0:38:400:38:44

-Let's have Kaipur at the end?

-Yeah.

-OK, least likely to be pointless.

0:38:440:38:48

-Bengal.

-Bengal.

0:38:480:38:50

Bengal goes first and then Kathmandu in the middle.

0:38:500:38:52

OK, well, let's put those answers up on the board in that order, then,

0:38:520:38:55

and here they are.

0:38:550:38:57

We've got Bengal, Kathmandu and Kaipur.

0:38:570:39:00

Well, very, very best of luck.

0:39:000:39:03

Now, if one of these turns out to be a pointless answer

0:39:030:39:06

and you win that jackpot of £10,250, what would you do with it?

0:39:060:39:10

Sandy?

0:39:100:39:12

Go on holiday, you know, something like that, get away.

0:39:120:39:14

Very nice. Jenny, anything in particular?

0:39:140:39:17

Well, obviously, both our jobs are fairly seasonal

0:39:170:39:19

so we spend the winter doing a bit of travelling.

0:39:190:39:21

Somewhere where there's surf and marine animals

0:39:210:39:23

would be a perfect combo.

0:39:230:39:24

Lovely.

0:39:240:39:26

Well, very, very, very best of luck.

0:39:260:39:28

Three good answers on the board, let's hope.

0:39:280:39:31

Your first answer is Bengal.

0:39:310:39:33

In this case, we were looking for state capitals of India.

0:39:330:39:36

Let's find out. If this is right,

0:39:360:39:37

then let's find out if it's pointless.

0:39:370:39:39

If it's both of those things,

0:39:390:39:40

you will leave here immediately with £10,250.

0:39:400:39:42

How many people said Bengal?

0:39:420:39:44

Oh! Bad luck, I'm afraid.

0:39:480:39:51

An incorrect answer to kick us off there.

0:39:510:39:53

Two more shots at today's jackpot. Your next answer was Kathmandu.

0:39:530:39:57

Now, in this case,

0:39:570:39:58

we were looking for capitals of landlocked Asian countries.

0:39:580:40:01

If this is pointless, it will win you £10,250.

0:40:010:40:06

Let's find out how many of our 100 people said Kathmandu.

0:40:060:40:10

It's right.

0:40:130:40:14

Your first answer was Bengal,

0:40:140:40:16

which was incorrect.

0:40:160:40:17

Kathmandu, your second answer, though,

0:40:170:40:19

is absolutely right.

0:40:190:40:20

Down it goes through the teens

0:40:200:40:22

and into single figures.

0:40:220:40:23

Still going down, still going down...

0:40:230:40:24

Oh, 5!

0:40:240:40:26

Five of our 100 people said Kathmandu so not a pointless answer.

0:40:290:40:33

-It's a good answer.

-It's a good answer, it's a great score.

0:40:330:40:35

-Slightly encouraging.

-Sadly, it's not pointless, though.

0:40:350:40:38

You have one more shot at today's jackpot, though,

0:40:380:40:40

and your final answer was Kaipur.

0:40:400:40:42

In this case, we were looking once again for state capitals in India.

0:40:420:40:46

If this is right and if it is pointless, you will win £10,250.

0:40:460:40:51

How many of our 100 people said Kaipur? Is it pointless?

0:40:510:40:56

Oh, no!

0:40:590:41:01

Oh, and there you were saying that was the one

0:41:040:41:07

you were going to put last cos it was right.

0:41:070:41:09

You did incredibly well,

0:41:090:41:10

but I'm afraid you just didn't manage to find that all-important

0:41:100:41:13

pointless answer so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot

0:41:130:41:15

of £10,250. That will roll over onto the next show,

0:41:150:41:18

but you have been fabulous right across both shows you've been on.

0:41:180:41:21

It's been wonderful having you on and you each get to take home

0:41:210:41:24

-a Pointless trophy.

-That's all we came for.

-So, there you are.

0:41:240:41:26

Very well done.

0:41:260:41:28

And not a bad category to go for as well, actually,

0:41:330:41:35

there's some questions you could have got there. You did well.

0:41:350:41:37

No Kaipur - there's Jaipur, of course,

0:41:370:41:39

which would have scored you 11 points.

0:41:390:41:41

There's also Raipur, which would have been a pointless answer.

0:41:410:41:43

It would have won you the money, but no Kaipur, I'm afraid.

0:41:430:41:46

Bengal, that's a historical region of India,

0:41:460:41:48

not a state capital, unfortunately.

0:41:480:41:50

Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers

0:41:500:41:52

for the Indian state capitals.

0:41:520:41:54

Dispur, which is the capital of Assam.

0:41:540:41:56

Gandhinagar, which is the capital of Gujarat.

0:41:560:41:58

Now, Panaji is the capital of Goa,

0:41:580:42:00

which you were trying to think of, is a pointless answer.

0:42:000:42:02

Puducherry a pointless answer.

0:42:020:42:05

In fact, everything apart from Mumbai, Delhi, Jaipur,

0:42:050:42:07

Bangalore, Chennai, Lucknow, Kolkata, Chandigarh and Hyderabad.

0:42:070:42:11

Everything else was a pointless answer

0:42:110:42:13

so very well done if you got one at home.

0:42:130:42:14

The capital cities, now, of landlocked Asian countries.

0:42:140:42:18

Ashgabat, which is Turkmenistan.

0:42:180:42:19

Baku, which is Azerbaijan.

0:42:190:42:22

Bhutan's capital Thimphu

0:42:220:42:23

and Yerevan, which is Armenia,

0:42:230:42:26

also Vientiane, which is the capital of Laos.

0:42:260:42:28

So, very well done if you got one of those five,

0:42:280:42:30

those are the pointless answers there.

0:42:300:42:32

The currencies, this is the hardest one, I think,

0:42:320:42:34

but well done if you said the afghani,

0:42:340:42:36

which is from Afghanistan, of course.

0:42:360:42:37

The tugrik is Mongolia,

0:42:370:42:39

the som is Kyrgyzstan

0:42:390:42:40

and the kip is Laos.

0:42:400:42:43

Very, very well done if you got any of those at home.

0:42:430:42:45

Those were tough ones, but hopefully none of those

0:42:450:42:47

rang too much of a bell.

0:42:470:42:48

The capital cities, if you had a bit more time...

0:42:480:42:50

It's thinking of the -stans was the real secret there.

0:42:500:42:53

Thanks very much, Richard.

0:42:530:42:55

Well, Sandy and Jenny very sadly didn't win our jackpot today,

0:42:550:42:58

which means it rolls over onto the next show,

0:42:580:43:00

when we will be playing for...

0:43:000:43:01

Join us then to see if someone can win it.

0:43:050:43:07

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

0:43:070:43:10

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

0:43:100:43:12

Quiz in which contestants try to score as few points as possible by plumbing the depths of their general knowledge to come up with the answers no-one else can think of. Presented by Alexander Armstrong and Richard Osman.