Episode 31 Pointless

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Thank you very much indeed! Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong

and welcome to Pointless, the show where the aim of the game is to score as few points as

you can and you do that by coming up with the answers that no-one else

could think of. Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one...

Hello, my name's Jenny and I'm from Bournemouth,

and this is my friend Emily, and she's from Bristol.

-Hi.

-Couple number two.

Hi, I'm Chris from Surrey and this is Jeevan,

my university housemate from Shrewsbury.

Couple number three.

Hi, I'm Cameron, and this is my friend Laura,

-and we're from Glasgow.

-And finally, couple number four.

Hi, I'm Huub, this is my wife Grace, and we are from London.

And these are today's contestants.

Thanks very much, all of you. A warm welcome to Pointless.

We'll get a chance to chat to each of you throughout this show as it goes along,

so that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

Some people think he knows everything.

I think it's all just written on his glasses.

It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

-APPLAUSE

-Hiya. Hey, everybody. Afternoon.

Good afternoon to you, sir.

-Good afternoon.

-This lot seem like a fun bunch.

-Oh, they do, don't they?

-We've met a couple of them before.

Jeevan and Chris got knocked out in Round Two last time.

-Yeah.

-And Grace and Huub got all the way through to the head-to-head.

-Yeah.

-Didn't they? Very impressive against Phillip and Alick. Good head-to-head as well.

-Very good.

-And then they answered questions on the Bible in the final round.

-GASPING

-I know, right?

So, you know, I think we're going to have a lot of fun.

They're going to be quite tough to beat, I think, Grace and Huub.

They were very good last time.

The first Huub we've ever had on the show, as well, but I think,

having met you, I think we are going to try and have some more.

Because I think it's really worked for us.

I think it has. A few more Huubs.

-Yeah.

-Good.

-Exactly.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Well, Phillip and Alick, brilliant, brilliant final round last time

and they carried off no jackpot at all, I'm afraid.

So we add another £1,000 to the jackpot,

so today's jackpot starts off at £4,000.

There we are.

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

Remember, the pair with the highest score at the end of each round

will be eliminated, so keep your scores nice and low. Best of luck to all four players.

Our first category this afternoon is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

Authors In Haiku.

-Richard.

-On each board we are going to show you seven clues to

authors. You just have to rename the authors, please.

All the clues are in the form of haiku poems, which are 17-syllable poems.

Don't worry about that. It's just the author we need.

14 in all to get at home, so good luck.

Thanks very much indeed.

Let's reveal our seven haikus on the first board, and here they come.

We have got... HE READS THE CLUES

I'm going to read those all again.

There we are. Jenny, welcome to Pointless. Here from Bournemouth.

-That's right.

-What do you do in Bournemouth, Jenny?

-I'm a truck driver.

-Are you, now?

-Yes.

-How far do you travel in your truck?

Just within the UK.

What's the furthest you've had to go?

From Southampton to Leicester and back, I think, was the furthest.

Yeah. OK, how long have you done it for?

-Getting on for ten years, yeah.

-And do you like it?

-I do, yeah.

Yes. I like the... I do night driving now

and so I like the peace and quiet.

-I like the empty roads.

-I've done the Ice Road in...

..in Alaska going up...

And that is extraordinary, because all the truckers there,

-they all know each other.

-Mmm.

And there is a fantastic camaraderie, obviously, on the CB.

Is there a something a little bit like that,

-or have we got too many different routes, I suppose?

-Yeah, we don't have CBs any more.

-Really?

-No. So it's only... You just see the same people that...

If you work for the same company, then you just see the same people,

-yeah.

-Oh, that's a shame.

-Talking books?

-Yes, lots of talking books.

-That's very good.

-Yes.

-Excellent.

OK, now, Jenny, who would you like to go for on our board?

I think I'm going to go for the bottom one and Herman Melville.

Herman Melville, says Jenny.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Herman Melville for the bottom one.

It's right.

Look at that. Down to ten. Very well done indeed.

Great start to the show.

Ten for Melville.

Yeah, a very good answer.

Yeah, he is a direct relation of Moby, the musician, as well.

Mmm. Thank you very much, Richard.

Chris, welcome back. Welcome back.

Now, it was Round Two last time.

-Yeah.

-It was a fashion question that tripped both you and Jeevan.

It was a fashion disaster.

Well...

I'm going to say, yes, it was. It was. But anyway, you are back again,

and I have absolutely no doubt that you've got the intellectual chops to

get through Pointless, as long

as we don't throw you too many curved balls.

Remind us what you do, Chris.

I'm a student at the University of Birmingham.

That is right. You study economics and politics.

-That's right.

-Very good.

Tending at this stage to thinking of a political career, possibly?

-Potentially, yeah.

-Potentially.

-Still...

-How would you go about going into that?

Would you do research jobs at the Houses of Parliament or...?

Something like that, or work for an MP or something like that

would be... Yeah, I've had a little bit of that so far,

-so see how that goes.

-OK. Very good indeed.

Now, Chris, seven haikus there, each describing an author.

Who are they all?

So I'll go with the top one,

JRR Tolkien.

JRR Tolkien, says Chris, for the top one.

Let's see if that's right, and how many of our 100 people got Tolkien.

39. 39 for JRR Tolkien.

Yeah, he was a professor of Anglo-Saxon Old English at Oxford,

and that was a sort of literary group that met at Oxford,

the Inklings. Fought at the Battle of the Somme, JRR Tolkien.

-That I didn't know.

-Yeah. Extraordinary, isn't it?

-Yeah.

Thanks very much indeed. Now, Cameron.

-Hi.

-Cameron, welcome to Pointless.

Good to have you here from Glasgow.

-Yeah, from Glasgow.

-And what do you do, Cameron?

We both study at the University of Edinburgh.

-What are you studying at Edinburgh?

-History and politics.

Very good. Enjoying it?

A bit. Not really. I mean...

-Glowing...

-I enjoy university.

Oh, that's nice. Good. Making full use of Edinburgh.

-Yeah, exactly.

-Which, if you had to get rid of one bit,

is it the history that's annoying you or the politics bit,

-or is it just the work bit?

-A bit of each. A bit of everything.

-Oh, no.

-They were my two passions, history and politics,

but when you're forced to learn them, it's not so fun, I think.

You know what's going to happen? Ten years from now, you're going to

think, "Oh, I wish I'd worked a bit harder at the history and politics.

"I had all of those resources at my disposal and I just..."

-That's a nice thought.

-All right, Dad.

-Thanks. Yeah. Yeah!

Oh.

Anyway...!

Cameron, what would you like to go for on our board?

I really fancied Herman Melville, but that ship was sunk.

I think I'll have to go for the second bottom one,

the Russian novelist,

-and Leo Tolstoy.

-Tolstoy, says Cameron.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Leo Tolstoy.

35.

Not bad. 35 for Tolstoy.

Yeah, good answer, Cameron. Well played. Yeah, Gandhi read

Tolstoy's The Kingdom Of God Is Within,

-and it made a great impression on him.

-Thanks very much indeed.

-Grace, welcome back.

-Hi.

All the way to the head-to-head last time,

with some lovely low scores from you.

Got to be hoping to repeat that this time.

Remind us what you do, Grace.

-I'm a town planner.

-A town planner?

-Yeah.

-See, that is... That's quite fun, isn't it?

Erm...

-It's stressful.

-People's feelings run very high, don't they?

-Yeah, they do.

-People don't like too much radical change.

-Yeah.

-Was your background in architecture or what?

No, I just did my degree in town planning.

-I just went straight into it.

-I see, straight into town planning.

-Yeah.

-And there you are designing London for the next generation.

Yeah, you could say that.

Yeah. That's fun. And now, Grace, this board is all yours.

Do you want to talk us through it and fill in all the blanks?

It's quite a hard board.

I only know the fourth one down, which is JK Rowling.

And I'm going to go for the fifth one,

and hopefully I've got the right sister, and it's Charlotte Bronte.

Charlotte Bronte, says Grace. Let's see if it is the right sister.

How many of our 100 people said Charlotte Bronte?

It IS the right sister.

19. The second-lowest score

of the round so far.

Well done, Grace.

Yeah, well played, everybody, on that round.

Yeah, she was only 38 when she died, and she was the oldest

-of the Bronte sisters to die. Isn't that incredible?

-Incredible.

Amazing, when you think of the work that they produced between them.

The Texas-born writer who created Ripley is Patricia Highsmith.

-Mm-hm.

-She would have scored you one point. That's a terrific answer.

The comic novelist...

-PG Wodehouse.

-PG Wodehouse.

That would have scored 17.

-And the bestselling author...

-JK Rowling.

JK Rowling, yeah. And she would have scored 58.

Biggest score on the board, although quite a low score.

Quite a low scorer for JK Rowling.

Yeah. I wonder if people get confused by the clues sometimes.

Here we are. We are halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at our scores so far to see where we are.

Jenny, very well done indeed.

Your fabulous answer of Herman Melville has put you

right at the top of the table. Then we travel up to 19,

where we find Grace and Huub.

And up to 35, where we find Cameron and Laura, and then 39,

Chris and Jeevan. Not that far ahead.

But you're the high scorer, so, Jeevan, we need a low score from you.

How, as a matter of interest, did you find that board, Jeevan?

-I knew quite a few of those actually.

-Let's hope you know more

on the next board and you can find a nice low score. Good luck with that.

We are going to come back down the line now. Can the second players please step up to the podium?

Let's put seven more haikus up the board and here they are.

We have got...

I'll read those all again.

There we are. Huub, welcome back to Pointless.

Now, Huub, remind us what you do.

I'm a researcher for a publishing company.

That is right and it's a specialist financial publishing.

Yeah, regeneration and inward investment, yeah.

-For local authorities.

-I see. There we are.

-How long have you done that, Huub?

-Four years now.

-OK.

-Yeah.

-And how long have you lived over here?

Because you're from the Netherlands originally.

Yes. I have lived here five years now.

OK, be honest, now, Huub, are you happy here?

Do you yearn? Do you yearn for the Netherlands?

-I'm dying to go back.

-Are you really?

-No, sorry, I love it here.

-I'm really happy.

-I mean, it's not far.

-True.

-It's not like you've emigrated to the other side of the world, so that's... Yes.

There we are. Now, Huub, you're on 19.

Fabulous low score from Grace in the first round,

which means, if you can score 19 again,

you're absolutely through to the next round for sure.

Yeah. Erm...

I think I know a few on the board.

But I'm going to go for the top one,

which is, I believe, Victor Hugo.

Victor Hugo, says Huub.

Here is your red line. If you can get below that with Victor Hugo, you are through to the next round.

How many of our 100 people said it?

It's right.

Still going down, Huub. Look at that.

There we are. Down to 17, very well done indeed.

Through you go to Round Two.

36 is your total.

Well played, Huub. Yeah, safely through to Round Two.

-Well played.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So, now, then, Laura, welcome.

Great to have you here. Your set-up is exactly the same as Cameron's,

is that right? You're at Edinburgh?

-Yes.

-And also from Glasgow?

-Yes, correct.

-Now, Laura, what do you study at Edinburgh?

I am studying law.

Enjoying that?

Mm-hm.

Good.

Fantastic. Laura, what are your interests?

You're having a lovely time at Edinburgh, I hope?

-Yeah, I love uni.

-SUCH a beautiful place to be.

-Yeah.

-What sort of things are you filling your time with?

I like to socialise with my friends...

-Good.

-..and I like to bake.

-Good.

-I make...

I've made a few of my friends birthday cakes.

I like to decorate them nicely.

Fantastic. Now, Laura, there you are on 35.

High-scorers at the moment are Jeevan and Chris on 39.

Ideally you'd score three or less with this answer.

Literature is not my strong point, and the only two I knew were

Victor Hugo and the answer that I'm going to give,

which I'm pretty sure loads of people will know,

which is the second from the bottom.

-Jane Austen.

-Jane Austen, says Laura.

Here is your red line. It's very low,

but let's see how far down the column we get with Jane Austen.

It's right.

Look at that. 28. 28 for Jane Austen

takes your total up to 63.

It was originally called First Impressions, Pride And Prejudice.

But that's a better name, Pride And Prejudice.

-I think it is.

-It makes you think.

Yes, doesn't it? Thank you very much, Richard.

Now, welcome back, Jeevan. Remind us what you do, Jeevan.

So, I live with Chris and I study economics and,

unlike other contestants, I actually enjoy my course!

Oh, there you are! See, that's good.

Jeevan enjoys his course at the University of Birmingham.

-Yes.

-Very good. So what sort of house do you and Chris share?

How many of you are in the house?

-There is six of us in the house in total.

-Right.

-And it is, if you can believe it,

a terraced house in the Selly Oak area of Birmingham.

What sort of state do you keep it in? I'm guessing very neat.

I try. I try my best and I know Chris does as well.

Do you have items in the fridge with your name on

or do you trust everyone else in the house to respect what is yours?

I don't personally label things in the fridge.

-Does anyone else in the house do that?

-No. No.

-OK.

Not even your mate, Yakult?

Now, Jeevan, what are you going to go for?

Ideally you'd score 23 or less.

-Hmm...

-Mm-hmm.

-There are a few on there that I've got ideas of,

but I'm not willing to risk it just yet.

I think what I will do is go for the second one and say George Orwell,

who wrote Animal Farm.

OK, yes, good luck.

That's your red line. You really, really need to be getting below that

red line or I think we'll be saying goodbye to you. You've gone for George Orwell.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said George Orwell.

I feared that was going to happen, Jeevan.

46 for George Orwell,

taking your total up to 85.

Yeah, he was shot by a sniper during the Spanish Civil War,

George Orwell, in the neck.

-It didn't kill him.

-In the neck?

-Yeah, it contributed to his death 13

-years later, yeah.

-Wow. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Mmm. Emily, welcome to Pointless.

Good to have you here, from Bristol.

-Yeah.

-And what do you do, Emily, in Bristol?

I'm a PhD student at the University of Bristol and I also work as an

-administrator there.

-Within the university?

-Yeah.

-Which came first? You were an administrator there first?

I was an administrator there first and I was doing a PhD

at Swansea University, but that didn't really work out,

so I switched to Bristol because I lived and worked there.

-Made much more sense.

-Yeah.

-So, what's the administration you do?

I'm a research centre administrator,

so I provide admin support

to the academics that run the research centres.

And what about the PhD?

-What's that in?

-My PhD is looking at

how and why drugs became illegal globally.

-THAT'S an interesting PhD.

-Yeah.

-Yeah, fascinating.

And now, there you are on ten.

Lovely low score from Jenny in the first pass.

The high score is for 85.

So, if you can score 74 or less, you are comfortably into the next round.

Do you feel like talking us through that board and filling in the blanks?

So, the writer that was made a dame and invented Hercule Poirot is

Agatha Christie.

Brighton Rock writer is Graham Greene.

I'm going to go for born in Bangladesh,

her first novel was Brick Lane,

-Monica Ali.

-Monica Ali, says Emily.

There is your red line.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Monica Ali.

It is Monica Ali and you are into Round Two.

Two for Monica Ali!

What about that? There is a score,

taking your total up to 12.

Commendably low score, there.

Yeah, how about that on podium one?

Very well played. You were right about the other two as well.

Went for the right one. Agatha Christie,

she would have scored you 41.

Graham Greene...

..would have scored you 15, and Adam Bede and Silas Marner...

-Is George Eliot.

-George Eliot.

And she would have scored you eight, so Monica Ali -

best answer on the board. Well played.

Thank you very much indeed. So, at the end of our first round,

the pair we have to send home, with their high score of 85...

George Orwell, I'm afraid, yes, that was a punishing score there, but...

It means, I'm afraid, we've now got to say goodbye to you, which is terrible. I'm sorry.

Thanks so much for playing, Jeevan and Chris.

But, for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

And there we are, suddenly down to three pairs.

And at the end of this round we are going to have to say goodbye to another pair.

Well, look, there is Grace and Huub,

who were our low-scorers again and again last time.

This time, though, Emily and Jenny are our low scorers.

We have new low scorers.

Anyway, best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two this afternoon is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is.

Here it comes. We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

Countries with no consecutive vowels in their name.

-Richard.

-Yeah, simply any country of the world...

By country, we mean a sovereign state that is a member of the UN in its own right,

whose name doesn't contain consecutive vowels at any point of

its name, so any two vowels together at any point of its name, please.

So, any country of the world vowels doesn't have two consecutive vowels

-anywhere in its name.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So, Emily, what would you like to go for?

Erm... I am going to go for Pakistan.

Pakistan, says Emily.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Pakistan.

It's right.

Down to five. Not bad at all.

Five for Pakistan.

Yeah, it's got the sixth-highest population in the world, Pakistan,

and it hasn't won an Olympic medal since 1992.

But one thing I can say for it is all its vowels are very carefully kept apart by consonants,

so it's done a grand job there.

-Less puzzled by that.

-But that's amazing, isn't it?

That IS amazing. Thank you very much indeed.

-Now, Laura...

-Yes.

Laura, what would you like to go for?

Five, the only score we've got so far.

My geography isn't great...

..so I'm going to go for San Marino.

San Marino, says Laura.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said San Marino.

Well, we have a five on our scoreboard at the moment.

San Marino is taking us down. Where will it end up?

Oh, look at that!

Down to pointless. Look at that, Laura!

That adds £250 to today's jackpot

takes the total up to £4,250, and scores you absolutely nothing.

And earns you a hug from Cameron,

in fact. Do you know where San Marino is?

No. No idea.

Let's make a point of finding out where San Marino is.

-Mm-hm.

-Yeah, well played, Laura.

It's literally just outside Glasgow.

It's got a lot of vowels in it, San Marino.

-That's a scary one.

-I know.

That feels like two of them MUST be together at some point, but, no,

-great answer.

-Yeah. Thank you very much indeed.

Now, Grace...

I'm going to go for Bhutan.

Bhutan, said with great confidence.

Let's see how far down the column we get with Bhutan.

It's right.

It's another pointless answer! Very well done indeed, Grace!

That's another £250 to today's jackpot,

takes our total up to £4,500,

scores you nothing, and earnt you

a chaste pat from your husband,

"Chaste Pat".

-Which is another of your nicknames.

-Chaste Pat.

That's another very good answer.

Well played, everybody. Yeah, Bhutan.

The king and queen of Bhutan had a son in 2016

and they planted 100,000 tree saplings to celebrate.

-That's nice.

-Nice, isn't it?

-That is nice.

-Yeah.

Thank you very much indeed. OK, we're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. Nothing, the best score of that pass.

Well done, Grace. Well done, Laura. Five is where we find Emily and Jenny.

That suddenly looks like a very big score, doesn't it?

So, Jenny, yes, you know what we need.

It's going to have to be a pointless answer at the very least.

So, good luck with that. We're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, now, Huub...

Huub, what are you thinking of?

I think that I am going to go for

the South American country

-of Suriname.

-Suriname, says Huub.

Let's see what happens when you say Suriname.

If you can score four or less, you're through to the next round.

There's your red line.

It's right.

Two! Very well done.

Good enough to see you through,

taking your total up to two.

Very well played, Huub.

Of course, a country with many, many Dutch connections.

A lot of the great Dutch footballers have Surinamese roots.

-Interesting. I didn't know that.

-Yeah.

Thank you very much, Richard. Now, then, Cameron.

Cameron. Again, you are looking to score

four or less to be through to the head-to-head.

-What are you thinking of?

-I'm going to go with a very traditional answer

for the show and say Central African Republic.

It's such a long name for a country.

It really takes quite a lot of analysing

to make sure that all of those vowels are kept apart.

-I've had a while.

-OK. You have. You've had a while.

OK, Central African Republic, as Cameron says,

a staunch favourite of Pointless.

Let's see how much it scores.

There is your red line.

It's right.

One!

One! Good enough to get you through.

Not good enough to be pointless, I'm afraid, but still,

that's a great low score, taking your total up to one.

Well played, Cameron. Very rarely pointless, these days, Central African Republic.

Well up in the north of Scotland, there are various national parks

which are places where there is no light pollution, and

they deliberately make them so that you can see the night sky,

but they are very, very few and far between in the UK.

Three quarters of the Central African Republic has pristine sky conditions,

no light pollution at all.

Thank you very much, Richard. Now, Jenny, what about that?

There you are, five is the score posted on your display there

and I'm afraid that marks you down as the high-scorers

even before you've given your answer. I know you've got an excellent answer there,

but I'm afraid we will be saying goodbye to you

at the end of this round. What are you going to go for, Jenny?

Er, I'm going to go for Rwanda.

-Rwanda.

-Yeah.

-Rwanda, says Jenny.

No red line, I'm afraid, as you're already the high-scorers,

but let's see how many of our 100 people said Rwanda.

It's right.

Down it goes to two! Very well done indeed, Jenny.

Lovely low score,

takes your total up to seven.

Another good answer. Yeah, it's great answers from everyone there.

On the last Saturday of every month in Rwanda,

every single adult from 18 to 65 does three hours' community service.

They call it Umuganda, which means to come together

-for common purpose. That's a good idea, isn't it?

-That's nice.

-Yeah, it's a nice idea.

-And that's very good.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

Right, now, there's lots of pointless answers here. Terrific scoring from everyone.

Ten between the three podiums, which is great stuff.

Let's take you through a few of the pointless answers here.

You could have had...

All of these would have added money to the jackpot...

There's Bhutan, which we heard, of course.

You could have had Benin, Burkina Faso, Capo Verde, Congo, Costa Rica,

Dominica, Dominican Republic, El Salvador,

Fiji, Grenada, Guyana, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan,

Lesotho, Marshall Islands,

Montenegro, Niger, Seychelles, Sri Lanka,

Swaziland, Tajikistan, Timor-Leste, Tonga, Trinidad and Tobago,

Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan. All of those were pointless answers.

Very well done if you got one.

And let's take a look at the top three scorers now,

the ones that most of our 100 people said...

And our old friends France, with 69, right at the top.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. So, at the end of our second round,

the pair we have to say goodbye to, with their high score of seven -

I mean, really, - Jenny and Emily, I'm afraid it's you.

Our wonderful low-scorers from the first round.

That was a very, very impressive round.

Quite rare when every single answer

is one that wins approval from Richard.

And I think that was...

That was certainly the case there. Anyway, we'll see you again

next time. I'm sure you'll get much further. But in the meantime,

thank you very much indeed, Jenny and Emily.

But for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

Very well done, Grace and Huub, Laura and Cameron.

You are now one step closer to the final and a chance to play

for our jackpot, which currently stands at £4,500.

Here we are in the head-to-head, which means you can start playing as a team.

You can chat before you give your answers. First player to win two questions

will be playing for the jackpot. Best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

Here is your first question and it concerns...

-Bear Species.

-Yeah,

the good news is we're about to show you five pictures of bears,

which will be nice. The bad news is you have to name the species of bear

they are, but we're going to give alternate letters as well.

Thank you very much indeed. OK, let's have a look at our five bear species, and here they come.

We have got...

There we go. Five species of bear.

Now, then, Grace and Huub, you've been our low-scorers,

so you will go first. THEY WHISPER

Erm... We know the last three, but we are going to go for D,

-which is the brown bear.

-You're going to go for brown bear.

Grace and Huub say brown bear.

Now, Laura and Cameron, talk us through our bears.

We don't know A.

We'd take a guess at Asiatic black bear.

B, I think, is sloth bear.

C, do you want to say this one, Laura?

Giant panda. And E is polar bear.

-Shall we go with B?

-Yeah.

-I think, can we go with B, sloth bear?

Sloth bear. So, we have brown bear and sloth bear.

Now, Grace and Huub have gone for brown bear for D.

Let's see how many of our 100 people got that.

It's right.

78! Brown bear, big score.

Laura and Cameron, meanwhile, have gone for B and said sloth bear.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

It's right and it wins you the point. Well done.

With room to spare,

down it goes to 21.

A very good score for sloth bear.

Laura and Cameron, very well done. After one question, you're up 1-0.

Yes, the second best answer on the board.

The best answer on the board you knew as well

because A is the Asiatic black bear,

which scored you 18 points.

Unsurprisingly, some big scores

for these other two.

What do you think would score more?

I think probably panda.

Panda, giant panda would have

scored you 87. They're no longer

endangered, they are now

just vulnerable, which is good news,

so they are on their way back,

which is lovely. But the polar bear is a HUGE scorer.

98 points for the polar bear.

How about that?

Thank you very much, Richard. Now, here comes your second question.

Laura and Cameron, riding high at the moment.

Grace and Huub, you have to win this one to stay in the game,

so best of luck. Our second question today is all about...

-Richard.

-Going to give you five clues to bands that are fictional

or began their lives as part of a fiction. You have to tell us the names of these bands, please.

Thank you very much indeed. Let's reveal our five fictional bands, and here they are.

I'll read those all again.

Laura and Cameron will go first.

We know either one, two or zero of them.

CHUCKLING

I think we're going to take a guess at the third one,

Rob Reiner film, and it might be Spinal Tap.

Spinal Tap, say Laura and Cameron.

Spinal Tap. Now then, Grace and Huub,

do you want to talk us through that board?

I think the first one is The Commitments.

I think the fourth one is The Monkees.

And that's all, so it's either between The Monkees

and The Commitments.

-The Monkees.

-You're going to go for The Monkees.

So, we have Spinal Tap and we have The Monkees.

Laura and Cameron went for Spinal Tap.

Let's see if that is right for the Rob Reiner creation.

It's right.

That is a great score, down to nine.

Very well done indeed, Laura and Cameron, Spinal Tap,

looking very strong there.

Meanwhile, Grace and Huub have gone for The Monkees.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said The Monkees.

It's right.

Ooh, 58 for the Monkees.

Well, there we are.

Laura and Cameron, very well done indeed.

After only two questions, you're straight through to the final, 2-0.

Very well played. This Is Spinal Tap, funniest comedy film ever made?

-I think, probably yes.

-I think probably yes as well.

It's very difficult to think of one that's better.

The Commitments would have been a much better score. Wouldn't have won you the point, though,

cos it would have scored you 15. Eric Idle's parody of The Beatles?

-The Rutles.

-The Rutles would have scored you 18.

And very well done if you know this movie and you know the name of the

fictional band. It's a pointless answer and it is

Where's Fluffy. Very well done if you said that.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head, I can't bear it, Grace and Huub.

Twice you have been our low scorers coming into the head-to-head,

and I'm afraid twice now we've had to send you away.

I'm afraid this is the end of the road, Grace and Huub.

We have to say goodbye now, but it's been wonderful having you

on both shows. Thank you for playing so well, Grace and Huub.

But, for Laura and Cameron, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Laura and Cameron,

you fought off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £4,500.

What about that? Your first appearance on Pointless,

we had a pointless answer from you, 2-0 in the head-to-head.

Do you know what? I think you are just longing to get back

to your courses. Back to the norm, back to history and politics.

You just didn't want to be away for a second longer

than you needed to be. What would you like to see come up in this last round?

Maybe American TV.

I'd take sport.

OK. Well, let's hope something on the board appeals to you.

You know what happens, four things go up there,

they look quite forbidding sometimes when you first see them,

but behind each one, there are three subsections,

so there might be something better behind each one. Anyway, let's see what today's selection looks like.

We've got...

Phil Collins...

LAUGHTER

-So...

-I'd be more embarrassed to do badly at Scottish politics

than at sporting achievements.

Shall we go with sporting achievements?

OK. Yeah, I'll do my best to pitch in!

-Yeah, we'll go sporting achievements.

-Yes, please.

CHUCKLING

-Sporting achievements.

-I was just about to do my speech

where I say these do come up completely randomly,

so for two Scottish people,

one of whom is doing a politics degree, to get Scottish politics,

it is just one of those things.

You have to get unbelievably lucky but they do happen sometimes.

And it happened for you, but let's go with sporting achievements,

shall we?!

Let me just rearrange my paperwork for a moment because I was,

for various reasons, I was looking at a different question.

Here are your three questions for sporting achievements.

I think you'll have a good shout with this one as well.

But you would have walked the other one! Anyway, doesn't matter.

Let's take a look at them. Sporting achievements. We are

looking for any of the following, please. The name of any man who has ever run under 9.9 seconds

for the 100 metres.

We are looking for any golfer who has ever scored a round of 63

at a major tournament. That's the Open, the Masters,

the US open, and the US PGA.

Or anyone who's ever scored a hat-trick in a World Cup finals,

please. That's up to July 2016, for all of those,

so sub 9.9-second 100m runners,

golfers with rounds of 63 and hat-trick scoring footballers at a World Cup. Good luck.

Thanks very much indeed. Now,

as always, you've got up to one minute to come with three answers.

All you need to win the jackpot is for just one of those answers

to be pointless. Are you ready?

-Yes.

-OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

-This is so cruel.

-OK, so...

There's a guy called Ben Johnson who ran a drug-assisted 9.9 seconds,

-I don't know if that will count.

-Anything that's been wiped off the records won't count, yep.

Footballers who have scored a World Cup hat-trick,

you've got Geoff Hurst, but that will be really obvious.

Ronaldo, Portuguese, Ronaldo,

scored a World Cup hat-trick.

Pele - again, too obvious.

-Yeah.

-There's a guy called Just Fontaine, who's French,

-that we'll put as one answer...

-OK.

-..who I just thought of there.

Golfers with rounds of 63.

Phil Mickelson, um...

Mark Calcavecchia might have done that, but I don't know.

I think we'll ignore the runners, unless...

-Yeah, I only know, like, the really famous ones.

-Yohan Blake, would you know him?

-Yeah, I know him. So, I don't think we should go for him.

-Yeah, let's not say him, then!

Golfers with rounds of 63... So we will go Just Fontaine...

..say Phil Mickelson because I know he has 63 on a Major and...

-Who was that Mark guy you said?

-Just drawing a mind blank. Mark Calcavecchia.

-He probably didn't.

-OK, that's your time up. Let's have your three answers now.

And if you say which category you are answering in, that would be great.

OK. Golfers with rounds of 63 at a Major, we'll say Phil Mickelson.

-Phil Mickelson.

-A footballer with a World Cup hat-trick, Just Fontaine.

Just Fontaine.

I'll also say Mark Calcavecchia as a golfer,

but I'm not confident.

OK. Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-I think Just Fontaine.

-OK, Just Fontaine goes last.

-Least likely to be pointless?

-Mark Calcavecchia because I'm pretty sure it's wrong.

Mark Calcavecchia, OK.

Let's put those answers on the board in that order, then.

Here they are. We have got...

Three answers on the board. If one of these turns out to be pointless

and wins that jackpot for you,

£4,500, nice jackpot to be taking home,

what would you like to do with your share of that, Laura?

I'd probably go shopping.

-CHUCKLING

-And save some of it for a holiday.

Very good indeed. Cameron, how about you?

A big night out,

then...a bigger night out,

-and then a holiday.

-Very good.

OK, very best of luck. Three good answers on the board,

let's hope one of them is pointless and wins the jackpot for you.

Your first answer was Mark Calcavecchia.

In this case, we were looking for golfers with rounds of 63

at a Major. If this is pointless, it wins you £4,500.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Mark Calcavecchia.

OK, I think you suspected as much.

That is an incorrect answer,

which means we move swiftly on to your next answer,

which is Phil Mickelson.

In this case again, we were looking for golfers with rounds of 63 at a

Major. If Phil Mickelson is pointless, it will win you £4,500.

How many of our 100 people said Phil Mickelson?

It's right.

Mark Calcavecchia, your first answer, was incorrect,

Phil Mickelson is absolutely on the money.

Down we go through the teens.

And we are into single figures, still going down.

Down it goes to four. Four for Phil Mickelson.

See, that's more like it. There we are.

But annoyingly, only pointless answers

are acceptable in this last round. So we have to move on to your third and final answer,

which was Just Fontaine. You thought this was clearly your best shot

-at a pointless answer.

-If he's right, hopefully.

We were looking for footballers

who scored a hat-trick in a World Cup Finals game.

If it is right, and if it is pointless, it will win you £4,500.

Let's find out. Just Fontaine.

Is it a correct answer, is it pointless?

It is right.

Your first answer, Mark Calcavecchia was incorrect,

your second answer, Phil Mickelson, was correct

and took us down to four.

Just Fontaine now takes us into single figures, down we go.

We are passing four, we are still going down.

We have done it! Very well done indeed!

Absolutely brilliant, very well done.

-Thank you!

-Super.

Congratulations. Just Fontaine was a pointless answer, which means you go

home at that jackpot of £4,500.

Well, that turned out very nicely, didn't it?

That's great. And also you used your head there, cos one thing

all football fans know is Just Fontaine is the biggest scorer ever

at a World Cup, but had he scored hat tricks? Yeah, he scored two hat-tricks

-in 1958, when he scored those 13 goals.

-Do we get double the money, or...?

Terrific answer. You do not, I'm afraid!

You get half the money for turning down the thing that you do at university.

Let's take a look at the pointless answers in the different categories.

Some big names in all of these.

I suspect sports fans at home will have done rather well here.

Those 100m runners...

Maurice Greene was the world record-holder at one point over Daley Thompson.

Could have had Ato Boldon as a pointless answer, Bruny Surin,

Francis Obikwelu, Leroy Burrell, Nesta Carter,

Richard Thompson, Ryan Bailey.

Some big names there, very well done if you said any of those.

Usain Bolt was the biggest scorer there by a mile,

followed by Asafa Powell.

Now, the golfers. Some famous ones here as well.

Major winners on this board...

You could have had Brad Faxon, more recently, Jason Dufner,

Mark O'Meara a pointless answer, Payne Stewart, Steve Stricker,

Thomas Bjorn. And the footballers who scored a World Cup hat-trick.

Lots of names on this list.

Here are some of the more famous ones.

Just Fontaine, very well done.

Geoff Hurst and Pele are the two biggest scorers up there,

as you might expect. Very well done if you got one of those at home,

and congratulations in the studio for going for the category

you shouldn't not have gone for and still winning £4,500!

Thanks very much indeed.

Well, thanks once again to our winning players, Laura and Cameron,

who go away with today's jackpot of £4,500. Very well done.

Join us next time, when we'll be putting more obscure knowledge

to the test on Pointless. In the meantime, it's goodbye

-from Richard...

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me, goodbye.