Episode 38 Pointless

APPLAUSE Thank you very much indeed.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

the show where the aim of the game is to avoid the obvious answers

and find the obscure ones.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

Hi, I'm Nathan. This is my friend, Chris,

We're both from Chelmsford, in Essex.

Couple number two.

Hi, my name's Ruth.

This is my husband, Ambrish, and we're from Bexleyheath.

Couple number three.

Hi, my name's Ken and this is my daughter, Sarah,

and we're from Newcastle upon Tyne.

-And finally, couple number four.

-I'm Charlie, I'm from Kent.

And this is my friend, Rosalie, from Nottingham.

And these are today's contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much, all of you. A warm welcome to Pointless.

Lovely to have you here. We'll get a chance to chat

to each of you throughout the show as it goes along,

so that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

He's got a finger in every pie to 98 decimal places.

It's my Pointless friend. It's Richard.

-APPLAUSE

-Hiya. Hey, everybody.

Hiya.

-Good afternoon, sir.

-Good afternoon.

-Now, three things we need to talk about.

-Yes.

Firstly, two returning players -

Charlie and Rosalie got knocked out in Round One,

-Sarah and Ken got through to the head-to-head.

-Yep.

Secondly, that head-to-head was against Andy and Gavin.

-It was.

-Our Scottish friends.

They played a jackpot round about JFK. Played it so well,

they got three pointless answers.

Did they not? Walked away with three grand.

Lovely gents as well.

-Lovely, yeah.

-And three, most importantly,

Chris's hat.

Yes. LAUGHTER

Yes.

-That's the big one, isn't it?

-Yes.

Yeah. There's literally people at home

who are just not paying any attention to anything

-either of us are going to say now for the next 20 minutes.

-Yeah.

As they come to terms with what they're seeing.

Yeah. Somewhere, there is going to be a ringmaster watching,

going, "Oi! There it is! Grr!"

That is a bold move, isn't it?

It is a bold move. I don't even need to look at it,

-cos I can remember it.

-Yeah.

-It's singed onto my retina.

-Also, feels more like a podium four hat.

-It does.

I bet a bit of him was thinking, "I wish I was on podium four."

-Yeah.

-And we could get to the hat.

-Yeah.

-But he's like, right... I mean, he's right there.

-He's right there.

-On podium one.

Hat very much to the fore.

-Yeah.

-Everyone else trying to look over it,

like people sitting behind me in a cinema!

LAUGHTER

Look, listen. The sooner we start,

-the sooner we get to hear about the hat, so shall we?

-Done. OK.

Excellent. XANDER GIGGLES

Now, Andy and Gavin won the jackpot last time,

so today's jackpot starts off at a nice...

..modest £1,000. There it is.

If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

You are to remember this at all times.

The pair with the highest score at the end of each round

will be eliminated. That is it,

just keep your scores low and you've got nothing to worry about.

Best of luck to all four pairs.

Our first category today is...

Can you all decide in your pairs

who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

And the question concerns...

-Richard.

-Yeah, we're going to show you the names of seven films

on each pass. You need to tell us the name of the actor who won

the Best Actress Oscar for her role in that film, please.

We're also going to give you the year they won the Oscar.

OK, so we are looking for the Best Actress Oscar winners

from each of these films.

Here is our first board of seven, and we have got...

I'm going to read those all one last time.

Chris, welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you.

-Very good to have you here.

Tell me about that shirt.

I notice it's got... LAUGHTER

I'm just... Actually, what I'm really enjoying about that shirt

is it's got, you've got your buttons are regularly spaced,

and then, whoa! Suddenly there are two buttons together

-with less than an inch between them.

-It's a bit of a surprise, isn't it?

A bit of a surprise. It's a very fine shirt.

-What do you do, Chris?

-Both Nathan and I are ecologists.

That's a good thing to be doing.

Where do you do your ecology?

We do it in...South Essex.

-South Essex.

-And what sort of form does your particular ecology take?

So we will do habitat surveys and surveys for protected species.

-I see. So bat surveys?

-Bat surveys.

Is where most... A lot of people are getting familiar with bat

-surveys now.

-Yeah.

-We found out the other day that, on this show,

we found that a wombat wasn't a bat.

-We were very much taken aback, weren't we?

-Very much taken aback.

I did always think it was a bat.

Do you... Hang on. Is Chris ready for this?

-Did you know that the wombat wasn't a bat?

-I did.

-Hm.

-Sorry.

Have you made any good friends doing the bat thing?

Plenty of bat friends, yeah.

What do you wear

when you're doing the bat surveys?

Apart from my... You mean my Batman costume?

LAUGHTER

I wasn't really going to make

any kind of judgments at all at this stage.

I wanted just... I was wondering, what kind of...

How many bats are there? RICHARD LAUGHS

There's a pipit bat... How many types of bats...?

Sorry, how many bats are there?

-I mean...

-Is that your question?

Yeah, go on, Chris, answer the question.

-How many bats are there?

-17?

-70?

-17. One, seven.

-17? OK.

-And what's the rarest?

-I don't know.

I think it's a mouse-eared bat.

-Mouse-eared bat.

-Yeah.

-Very good indeed. Thank you, Nathan.

It's one that sort of pops over and disappears

across the Channel again each year.

A mouse-eared... Known cos its ears...

-I think so, yeah.

-..look sort of like mice.

-I've never seen one. But, yeah.

-Well, there we are. Good.

Now, Chris, what about this board of female...?

Looking at the board, I can see... Two answers are popping out to me.

But I think I'm going to have to go with Silence Of The Lambs

-and Jodie Foster.

-Jodie Foster, says Chris.

Let's see if hats, bats...that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Jodie Foster.

It's right.

42 for Jodie Foster.

Not bad, not bad. Less than 50.

Well played, Chris.

Yeah, also won for The Accused.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Now, Ambrish. Welcome to Pointless. Good to have you.

-What do you do, Ambrish?

-I work in the oil industry.

-Based where?

-Canary Wharf.

Did it involve you having to travel all around the world?

Not so much. I've been to Azerbaijan.

But, you know, there's potential for me to go to Chad, maybe.

-But...

-Mainly in the Docklands, though?

That seems to be where you're based.

Which is nice. I mean, you know, good.

What are your interests, Ambrish?

I'm into my sport. I like football, cricket, Formula 1. I do like films,

although this board's not doing a lot for me, I think.

Not seen a lot of them.

It's nice having people whose names are so like

the location of the Archers.

I don't actually know where that is, either.

Especially with Ruth here.

I know! Ruth and Ambridge.

-Oh, right.

-We've got the whole thing!

-Anyway, now, Ambrish, what would you like to go for?

-Um...

Like I say, I'm not having a lot of joy with that board.

I think I'm going to have to go with Mary Poppins.

Was that Julie Andrews?

Julie Andrews. How many of our 100 people said Mary...

..Julie Andrews?

It's right. 42 is the only score we have posted.

62 is what we get for Julie Andrews.

Well played. Yeah, she was nominated

twice more for the Sound Of Music, obviously,

and for Victor Victoria.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Now then, Sarah, welcome back.

Remind us what you do, Sarah.

I work for a department store in the centre of Newcastle.

In the centre of Newcastle, and you've been there for ten years.

-Ten years, yes.

-What is your department in the department store?

I look after the nursery department.

Oh, that's nice. That's quite an important...

-It is, yeah.

-Of all the departments,

that's the one where every single customer needs bespoke advice.

-Absolutely, yeah.

-Wow.

Now, Sarah, how do you find this board?

I thought I knew one, and just moments ago,

I realised I was thinking of the wrong film.

-Oh, no!

-So this is a little bit of a risk,

cos I'm not 100% sure if it's right,

but I'm going to go for The Hours and Meryl Streep.

Meryl Streep for The Hours, says Sarah. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Meryl Streep.

Oh! Do you know what? I would have said exactly the same.

-Yeah.

-Not Meryl Streep, I'm afraid.

-Yeah.

-So you and I, both wrong there, only I'm afraid it's only you

-who scored 100 points.

-Yeah.

-It's not fair.

-Yeah, sorry, Sarah.

Plenty of people would have made the same mistake.

She is in The Hours, but, yeah,

she wasn't nominated for Best Actress for it. Sorry.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

-Now, Charlie.

-Hello.

Welcome back to Pointless.

Remind us what you do, Charlie.

I'm a Masters student at the University of Kent.

That is right, and you are studying what?

International relations.

International relations.

How much more time have you got on your Masters-ship?

-I've got a year.

-What do you think you'll do on completion?

Save the world...again.

-Save the world.

-From everything!

Will you just hurl yourself into international relations?

-Yeah.

-Maybe will you do it a different way?

-I've no idea. This is how far ahead I plan.

-OK. Very good.

What are you going to be doing at the weekend, Charlie?

-RICHARD LAUGHS

-I actually don't know that either.

XANDER GASPS Make a plan instantly.

What would you normally like to do at a weekend? What would...?

It just depends what's on. I live in a town where nothing happens,

-so I don't normally do anything...

-Hang on, where do you live?

A really small town in North Kent.

-Called?

-Sittingbourne.

Nothing happens in Sittingbourne?

I have the What's On Sittingbourne magazine right here.

-It's two pages long.

-You're right, you're right.

There is... I tell you what, outside the Three Wheat Heads,

the Morris men are meeting at 11.30 on Saturday morning.

-Of course.

-Don't miss that.

-How could I forget?

-There you are, yeah.

Charlie, what would you like to go for on this board?

It's all yours. If you want to talk us through it, you can.

Well, I would love to talk you through it,

but I would just be reading what's already there.

That's how much I know,

so this is genuinely just going to be a film and an actress

in vain hope.

Please don't kill me, Rosalie.

It's going to be The Reader and...

Who's an actress that does things? Amanda Siegfried?

"An actress that does things!"

Amanda Siegfried, says Charlie.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

-Oh, who saw that coming?

-I'm afraid an incorrect answer,

but you're in very, very good company

cos Sarah and Ken are on 100 as well.

Yeah, let's fill in the rest of this board, shall we?

Now, The Reader is...

-Kate Winslet.

-..Kate Winslet.

She would have scored you 22.

The Hours, not Meryl Streep, although she is in it,

-is Nicole Kidman.

-Of course, yes.

-That would've scored you 12 points.

-Funny Girl?

-Is Barbra Streisand.

Barbra Streisand. That would have scored you 39.

-Gone With The Wind?

-Vivien Leigh.

Correct. Would have scored you 22. And the best answer on the board,

The Trip To Bountiful, very well done if you said

Geraldine Page. Would have scored you one point,

-terrific answer.

-Very Good. Thank you very much, Richard.

We're over halfway through the round,

let's take a look at those scores.

42, actually, the best score of the pass, Chris.

So very, very well done there.

You've set yourself and Nathan up very well indeed.

Then we travel over to Ambrish.

Ambrish and Ruth have got 62 on the board.

And then it's up to 100, where we find Charlie and Rosalie

and Sarah and Ken. So, Rosalie and Ken,

it's going to be between you, I think,

to see who leaves and who stays with us at the end of the round.

Best of luck with that. We come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, let's put seven more films up on the board. And here they are.

We've got...

Let's read those all again.

-Rosalie, welcome back.

-Hi.

-Remind us what you do, Rosalie.

I'm doing a PhD in chemistry at Nottingham.

That is right. And what are your interests, Rosalie?

I look after my parents'

baby bunnies and stuff like that, and then I...

The only sport that I can really say I'm any good at is skiing.

Very good indeed. Do you go skiing every year?

-Do you try...

-? Most years. If we can afford it, yeah.

-Snowboarding?

-No.

-No.

-No.

Traditionalist, quite right.

Now, Rosalie, what would you like to go for?

You are high-scorers, joint high-scorers.

I don't recognise any of the movies, so...

I am going to go for The Room and Anne Hathaway,

because that's the only actress that's coming into my head.

Anne Hathaway. Let's see. Anne Hathaway for The Room.

No red line for you as you're joint high-scorers,

but let's see how many of our 100 people said Anne Hathaway.

Ooh!

I'm afraid not Anne Hathaway.

That's cost you 100 points, takes your total up to 200.

Still in the game, though.

We haven't had an answer from Ken yet.

-Yeah, Anne Hathaway is in a slightly bigger film called Cottage.

-OK.

LAUGHTER

Thank you very much indeed.

Now, Ken.

-Welcome back.

-Thank you.

Good to have you with us again. Remind us what you do, Ken.

I was a community... a community mental health nurse

in Newcastle upon Tyne, but now retired for the last four years.

What do like to fill your time with, Ken?

What would you like to do at the weekend?

At the weekend...

The weekend's often -

Saturdays particularly - taken up with football.

Newcastle United fan.

Otherwise, I'm a bit of DIY fanatic

and currently building guitars out of bits of scrap wood.

Now hang on, building guitars?

I mean, DIY, I was thinking sort of cabinets and maybe the odd table.

Well, I do make the odd table.

Guitars? Do you order them in a pack, or do you...?

No, no. I build them from scratch.

Don't build the necks, but the bodies I built from scratch.

Do you get, do you send off for a neck?

-Cos it has to be fretted...

-Yeah, yeah.

-..in a particular way.

But what, the bodies, what do you build them out of?

Well, I've been making cigar box guitars,

which you may or may not have heard of,

but that's an old traditional craft,

where people who couldn't afford to buy a guitar...

-Yeah.

-..would build one out of an old cigar box,

but cigar box manufacturers

are now wise to that and they sell the cigar boxes

at an inflated price,

so I actually build my own boxes as well,

and then fill them with bits of electronics,

and put a few strings on.

So they are semi-acoustic, are they? Or are they...

No, no, they are electric.

Completely electric? I see. OK. Well, that's exciting.

-How many have you made?

-Five at the moment.

Very good indeed. So who's the most famous guitarist

you've seen playing on a Ken guitar?

-Me, and I can't play very well.

-That's what I was hoping for!

There we are. Now, Ken, you have a target.

If you can score 99 or less, you're through to the next round.

I'd actually forgotten I was in a quiz show now.

I was just enjoying talking so much.

I'm going to go for Erin Brockovich.

Slight gamble, but I think it's Julia Roberts.

Julia Roberts, says Ken.

Here is your red line.

If you get below this, you are through to the next round.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Julia Roberts.

It's absolutely right, Ken, very well done.

And you are into Round Two.

61 is your score.

161, your total.

Well played, Ken.

One of her four Oscar nominations, her only win to date.

Very good indeed. Thank you very much indeed.

Now, Ruth, welcome to Pointless.

Lovely to have you here. What do you do, Ruth?

I am a human resources manager in the civil service.

In the civil... You see, that's nice.

Normally, when we have civil servants, they just, say,

"Well, we can't talk about what we do."

And you have just told me fully what you do.

What are your interests, Ruth?

What do you do when you're not doing that?

Well, when I'm not at work,

I have a bit of a second kind of career on the side.

I play bass guitar in a couple of bands.

That's exciting. Have you got a cigar box bass guitar,

-or have you...?

-I don't, but maybe I'll have a word with Ken.

-They're quite fun!

-Yeah.

-Ken, have you made a bass guitar?

I haven't, but I could do.

Yeah! That would be fun, wouldn't it?

What sort of band is it? What do you play?

We play '50s and '60s rock and roll covers.

We play around North Kent, actually, near Sittingbourne.

So, rock and roll, you could play

a string base for that, couldn't you?

Yes, but it wouldn't fit in my Fiesta, to be honest.

Fair enough. Very good point.

A collapsible string bass, maybe.

Now, Ruth, you are through, it doesn't matter what you score.

There'll be no red line for you.

But what would you like to go for on this board?

I think I know a couple.

There is one I'm going to go for.

I'm a bit surprised that she got an Oscar, actually.

If I'm right.

And Moonstruck, I think it's Cher.

Cher, says Ruth. Let's see if that's right. No red line for you.

How many of our 100 people said Cher?

34. Not bad at all.

96 is your total.

Yeah, well played, Ruth. We tend to think of her slightly less

as an actor these days, Cher,

but that was her second nomination and first win.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Now, Nathan. A warm welcome to Pointless.

Now, I happen to know what you do, but just remind us.

I'm an ecologist, the same as Chris.

I go about doing habitat and species surveys.

Very good. So what's the most interesting species

you've been sent out to survey?

The most interesting? That's a good question. I think it's probably...

Probably is bats.

-Bats?

-Most species we deal with, we deal on a single species basis,

-but bats, you have 17, so...

-So newts you haven't done?

Done some newt work. Done some dormouse work.

-A bit of orchid work?

-Orchid, yeah.

-Did some stuff down at Juniper Hall in Surrey.

-Juniper Hall?

Yeah, with Simon Harrap, who's an orchid specialist.

He's a pretty interesting guy.

-Simon Harrap, the orchid man.

-Yeah, yeah.

-Harrap. Harrap, rap.

-Yeah.

THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER

-Got him.

-That's the one.

That's fun. I mean, what is the rarest, sort of,

or the most specialist animal or species you've come across?

-You're asking some good questions, Alexander.

-Yeah.

I think it's probably dormouse.

Oh! I love little dormice.

-They are endearing, yeah.

-They are.

-Can I just say something about Nathan?

-Yeah.

It's the first ecologist I have ever met who doesn't wear a hat.

LAUGHTER I was just thinking that, yeah.

I was just thinking about that.

Now, Nathan, you are also through to the next round, which is good news.

This board is all yours.

If you want to talk us through it, you'd be very welcome.

I'd like to talk you through it, but...

..I don't really know any of those off the top of my head.

So it would be a case of putting an actress to...

..a, sort of, ballpark year.

I think I'm going to go for Room, cos it's a recent film,

and the only actress that I can think of at the moment

is Jennifer Aniston.

CONTESTANT LAUGHS

-That's the only actress you can think of at the moment?

-Yep.

Very much the actress of the moment.

For Room, OK.

There's no red hat for you...

Line! Line! No red line for you, as you are already through.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Jennifer Aniston.

I'm afraid an incorrect answer there.

Scores you 100 points, takes your total up to 142.

-But you're through.

-Sorry, Nathan, never been nominated for an Oscar,

Jennifer Aniston. Room, do you know that one?

-Named after a cheese.

-Yes.

-Brie Larson.

-Brie Larson. Absolutely right. 10 points.

Who's Afraid Of Virginia Woolf?

-Elizabeth Taylor.

-Elizabeth Taylor.

Would have scored you 20.

Gaslight?

-It's Ingrid Bergman.

-Good.

-Would have scored you 2 points.

It is good, isn't it? Roman Holiday?

-Is Audrey Hepburn.

-The wonderful Audrey Hepburn.

She would have scored you 21.

-And Cabaret?

-Liza Minnelli.

Liza Minnelli, correct. And that would have scored you 40 points.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

We are at the end of our first round,

and we have to say goodbye to one of our pairs.

I'm sorry to say that pair...

It's one of our returning pairs as well.

Rosalie and Charlie. I'm so sorry. It's been lovely having you with us.

Far too soon to be sending you away, back to Sittingbourne.

I didn't know all of those actors anyway, so it's fine.

Lovely to have you here, Rosalie and Charlie.

Thank you so much for playing. Great contestants.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Look at that, we're down to three pairs.

At the end of this round, we have to say goodbye to another pair.

Well done, all of you, for making it through that round.

Ruth and Ambrish, our lowest scoring pair.

And, Ruth, our lowest individual scorer, so very well done to you.

Best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two this afternoon is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second? And whoever's going first,

please up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is.

Here it comes. We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

No I in "team"!

Teams with no I in their name.

Teams with no I in their name, Richard.

Yep, we're looking for any team in the top four flights

of English men's professional football, please,

in the 2016, 2017 season, with no I in their name.

-Best of luck.

-Thank you very much indeed,

Richard. So, Nathan...

I'll have to just go with something blatantly obvious,

because a lot of the ones I can think of either have "City"

-or "United" in the name.

-Mm.

-So it's going to have to be...

-..Arsenal.

-Arsenal?

-Yeah.

-Says Nathan.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Arsenal.

48 for Arsenal.

There we go, not bad.

Nathan, well played. No Is there.

Thank you very much, Richard. Now, Ambrish.

-Yes.

-What would you like to go for?

-I've got a few answers in my head.

I'm just trying to work out which one is going to be the most obscure.

But I think I'm going to go for Wrexham.

-Wrexham?

-Yeah.

-Wrexham, says Ambrish.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

Oh, no!

Oh! Ambrish.

-I'm a bit shocked.

-A bit shocked,

that's a good shocked face, actually.

I'm afraid that's incorrect for a reason

I'm sure we'll shortly discover. That scores you 100 points.

Sorry, they've been in and out of the league,

but currently not in the league.

They're in the National League, the fifth tier,

the first of non-league football. Sorry.

Thank you very much indeed.

Now, Sarah.

What would you like to go for?

I had a risky one, just in case I needed it.

But I didn't know which league they played in.

However, I don't feel like I need it now.

Sorry, Ambrish. Um...

I'm going to go for Everton.

Everton, says Sarah. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Everton.

It's right. Well, 100 was our highest score, you've passed that,

48 our low, you've passed that.

30. Very well done indeed, Sarah.

Yeah, well played.

Couple of Es, one O, no Is there.

-Nope.

-Good work from Everton.

Very good. Very good.

There's a V, and an R, and a T and an N as well.

That's all your letters.

You can spell the whole of the word Everton with just those.

What about that? Thank you very much indeed.

We are halfway through the round, let's look at those scores.

30, best score of the pass.

Well done. 48 is where we find Nathan and Chris.

And 100, Ambrish and Ruth, is where we find you.

I applaud what you did there with Wrexham, you just went too far.

-I had so many others!

-I bet you did. I'm sorry, Ambrish.

Ruth, who knows what will happen in the next pass.

But a low score from you might keep you in the game.

Good luck. We come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK. So, Ken. Remember, we're looking for

any football team whose name does not contain the letter I.

OK. I'm going to go for Wycombe Wanderers.

Wycombe Wanderers, says Ken.

Very good indeed.

There is your red line. If you get below that,

you are into the head-to-head.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right.

And you're into the head-to-head, Ken.

Still going down, still going down...

Down all the way to pointless! Very well done indeed.

That adds £250 to today's jackpot.

Takes the total up to £1,250.

It scores you nothing, leaves your total at 30,

and wins you the admiration of your daughter and the entire studio.

Very well done. 30 is your total.

Yes, very well played. The Chairboys of Wycombe Wanderers.

Nearly 20 letters in that, none of them I.

-It's impressive, is it?

-Yeah. That is something.

-And it's got a Y in it.

-I know.

Doing the work of an I.

Yes, all the heavy lifting of an I.

-But not actually an I. It's perfect.

-Clever.

Very clever. Ruth. Oh, Ruth.

Now, poor... Oh, Ambrish, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. You must... I bet you were so pleased with Wrexham.

-I was.

-I thought that sounded like a pointless answer.

I've got to redeem us.

OK. Um...

I'm going to go for Bolton Wanderers.

Bolton Wanderers.

Well, the Wanderers have done very well for Ken.

Let's see if they can for you, with Bolton.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Bolton Wanderers.

No red line, you're the high scorers.

It's right.

Down it goes, still going down, still going down,

down to five.

Very well done indeed, 105 is your total.

One of the founding members of the football league, Bolton Wanderers.

Had a steady decline recently, but hopefully on their way back up now.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Now then, Chris.

Now then.

Where did the hat come from, Chris?

-It was a gift.

-That's nice.

From Nathan, and several other of my lovely housemates at university.

Oh, I see. Quite sort of Willy Wonka, isn't it?

-Definitely, yeah.

-It's definitely theatrical.

-Yeah.

-Do you find that you have to be quite theatrical

when you're wearing it?

I find that sort of comes to me when the hat gets put on, anyway.

Right. OK. Chris.

You're on 48. You have to score 56 or less.

56 or less. Now, I noticed Nathan struggled a bit with this.

Would I be right in thinking that you are also not completely...

Completely across...

I was hoping that Nathan was the football member of our duo up here.

-Ah.

-So...

-I see.

Can I go for Blackburn Rovers?

Blackburn Rovers.

OK. Blackburn Rovers says Chris.

Here is your red line. If you can get below that

with Blackburn Rovers, you're into the head-to-head.

How many of our 100 people said Blackburn Rovers?

It's right.

And it gets you into the head-to-head.

Perfectly good, Chris.

Look at that. Down it goes, still going down.

It's a two-er.

It rather neatly takes your total up to 50.

Very well done.

Yeah, very well played.

Before the pointless answers, I'll just go through some of

the low scorers that scored two and lower.

Two also for Fleetwood Town, Shrewsbury Town, Cheltenham Town,

Doncaster Rovers, Crystal Palace.

Notts County and Barnsley would have scored you two.

One point for Crawley Town, Luton Town, Brentford, Barnet, Port Vale,

Rochdale and Newport County.

The four pointless answers, let's take a look at them.

Well done if you said Walsall, Stevenage, Morecambe...

..or Wycombe Wanderers. Very well done, Ken.

In other news, Fulham drew six-all with Derby County.

That was a cracking game, and the top three we've already heard,

Arsenal, Everton, and Chelsea were in second with 34.

Thank you, Richard. So at the end of our second round,

and I'm sorry to say, Ruth and Ambrish,

you are the pair we have to say goodbye to.

I'm so sorry. Yeah, Wrexham let you down there.

Anyway. On the strength of your performance up to Wrexham,

and including the spirit of Wrexham, I'm sure you'll go much,

much further next time. But thank you very much for playing,

-Ruth and Ambrish.

-Thank you.

But for the remaining two pairs it's now time for our head-to-head.

Congratulations, Sarah and Ken, Chris and Nathan.

You're now one step closer to the final,

and a chance to play for our jackpot,

which currently stands at £1,250.

We've made it to the head-to-head. So you now start playing as a team.

You confer before you give an answer

and the first pair to win two questions

will be playing for that jackpot.

Well, hats off to both pairs there.

It's great to have you here.

Ken, our only pointless answer of the show.

And Chris and Nathan, very well done.

Made it all the way here, only one point between you, actually.

So it should be very, very close indeed.

Best of luck. Let's play the head-to-head.

Here is your first question. And it concerns...

-Richard?

-We'll show you five pictures now of famous TV cooks,

can you identify the most obscure of these, please?

Thanks very much indeed. Let's reveal our five TV cooks,

and here they are. We've got...

There we are. Five TV cooks.

Sarah and Ken, you're our low scorers, so you will go first.

It's a bit of a punt.

E, Angela Hartnett?

Angela Hartnett, say Sarah and Ken for E.

Now, Chris and Nathan.

Talk us through that board, if you can?

Well, personally, I only know two of them.

Both of whom I think would be fairly obvious. Er...

One of them looks a little bit beyond my generation, I think.

-No offence to you.

-I think I have an idea.

-Oh, that's a... "Beyond my generation"!

-That's weird.

XANDER SCOFFS INDIGNANTLY

Don't think you can dress up "Before my time"

by saying "Beyond my generation!"

Don't come on here just cos your partner's wearing a hat,

and think you'll say something is before your time.

It's given me a false sense of entitlement, I'm sorry.

Yellow card. Official yellow card.

-OK. I'll go with it.

-Yeah?

Yeah, it's better than my two.

OK. I think we are going to go for B, Julia Child.

-Julia?

-Child.

Julia Child.

OK. So we have Angela Hartnett and we have Julia Child.

Sarah and Ken said Angela Hartnett for E.

Let's see if that's right, and how many of our 100 people said it.

It is right.

And it's a low... Look at that, down to three!

Three for Angela Hartnett.

That is great good score.

Now, Chris and Nathan have taken a punt on B,

and have said Julia Child. Let's see if that's right,

how many of our 100 people said Julia Child? Is it right?

It is Julia Child!

It is Julia Child.

LAUGHING: And it scores one!

What about that?!

Well done.

Well done, you, Chris and Nathan. That is a great answer.

It means, after one question, you're up 1-0.

Very, very well played, yeah.

Julia Child, The French Chef, lots of other shows that she presented.

A, of course, is Heston Blumenthal.

He would have scored you 49 points.

C, my favourite, Atul Kochhar would have scored you two.

And the biggest scorer, the lovely Ainsley Harriott,

he would have scored you 61.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So here comes your second question,

Chris and Nathan get to answer this one first.

Sarah and Ken, you have to win this to stay in the game.

Very best of luck. Our second question today is all about...

-Richard?

-Simply five clues to facts about Mount Everest,

which of the answers is the most obscure?

Thanks very much indeed. Let's reveal our five clues,

and here they come. We've got...

I shall read those all again.

There we are. Chris and Nathan will go first.

We think we only know two of them.

So we're going to go for what we think is the most obscure,

and what's most likely to be correct,

the Tibetan name commonly given to local mountain guides,

which is sherpas.

Sherpas, say Chris and Nathan. Sherpas.

Now, Sarah and Ken.

What else do you know on that board?

Well, we know the first two.

Edmund Hillary climbed Everest in 1953.

And the mountain range is the Himalayas.

Struggling with the other two. Sherpas is right.

And I think we'll probably just go for the decade.

The 1950s.

OK, the 1950s.

So we have sherpa, and we have 1950s.

Chris and Nathan said sherpa.

Let's see if it's right, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right.

37 for sherpa.

Sarah and Ken, meanwhile, have gone for the 1950s,

the decade of Hillary and Tenzing reaching the summit.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said the '50s.

It's right.

Ooh!

I knew this was going to be close.

37 for Chris and Nathan means Chris and Nathan,

after only two questions, you are straight through to the final, 2-0.

Well played, dates are usually good ones to go for.

I think it was announced just after Queen Elizabeth's Coronation,

I think maybe it's a famous decade.

But that is unlucky.

You wouldn't have saved yourself with the mountain range -

it is the Himalayas, of course.

It would have scored you 59.

The British name, this is a pointless answer,

very well done if you got it, it's Peak XV.

Oh, that's nice.

Yeah, it is nice, isn't it? Pointless answer.

His name was "Ee-verest", rather than Everest.

-It was Ee-verest?

-Yeah, but we call it Everest.

And the British mountaineer,

probably the most famous mountaineer other than Hillary.

-Is it Mallory? I don't know his Christian name.

-It's George Mallory.

George Mallory.

It would have scored you two points, well done if you said that at home.

Thank you very much indeed.

We are at the end of our head-to-head round.

And I'm sorry to say, Sarah and Ken, two fabulous performances,

consecutively on Pointless.

You've been in the head-to-head,

gone one step better, our low scorers this time.

But I'm afraid you didn't make it through to the final round,

which is a great shame. It's been lovely having you here.

-Thank you for playing, Sarah and Ken!

-Cheers.

But for Chris and Nathan, it is now time for our Pointless final.

Well, congratulations, Chris and Nathan,

you've seen off all the competition.

And you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £1,250.

Well, Julia Child, you suddenly pull that name out of a hat -

extraordinary. Where did that come from?

OK, I'm going to come clean. Er...

It came from a YouTube series called Epic Rap Battles Of History.

-Wow.

-And Julia Child rapped against Gordon Ramsay.

LAUGHTER

Listen, nothing wrong with that, that's how we learn stuff.

But... It's paid off. Massively.

Look at that. Anyway, well, here you are, in the final,

playing for the jackpot.

What would you like to see come up on the board behind me?

Anything scientific.

Yeah, anything to do with science. Maybe avoid chemistry,

but I think we're both pretty strong on natural history,

so if something like that came up, ideal.

OK. Well, very, very best of luck,

let's see what today's selection looks like. We have got...

OK, I feel like you'd probably be quite good at Celebrity TV.

I think that's definitely our best shot out of the four.

Yeah.

Sporting Siblings, it's Andy and Jamie Murray, the Williams sisters,

-and that's it.

-Yeah. I agree. Um...

Yeah, let's do Celebrity TV.

-Celebrity TV it is. Richard?

-OK, very best of luck, gents.

Here are your three different categories. We are looking for...

Anybody who took part in the I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!

series in 2015, please.

That's the one that ended in December 2015.

Anyone who took part in the 2016 Celebrity Big Brother,

the one that started in January 2016.

Or anyone who took part in Strictly Come Dancing 2015,

again, the one that ended in December 2015.

Strictly Come Dancing celebrities, not the regular dancers.

-Very best of luck.

-Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

As always, you've got one minute to come up with three answers.

And all you need to win that jackpot

is for just one of those answers to be pointless. Are you ready?

-Yes.

-Yes.

-OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

-There they are. Your time starts now.

-OK. I'm A Celebrity.

I'm A Celebrity, I wasn't following the latest series,

but I'll take a stab, who's come to the limelight recently?

I'd say perhaps Joey Essex. I think he might have been in there.

-Yeah?

-Yeah.

-Again, I don't think I've seen any of these...

-No.

-..these shows.

I think I saw the 2014 one, was that when the Geordie Shore girl won it?

I don't know, I don't know.

We'll go Joey Essex for that, I think.

Strictly Come Dancing, 2015,

can you remember the dancers rather than contestants?

-Just the contestants was the...

-OK.

-And so...

-I think Scott Mills was on there.

-That's going to be popular, but it's better than nothing.

-Sure.

That's about all I can get in.

OK, Scott Mills. Celebrity Big Brother, again, no idea.

It doesn't have to be from that, it can the other two again.

Can you think of any more on I'm A Celebrity?

I do remember there was a girl from The Only Way Is Essex.

It was one of the girls.

-Ten seconds left.

-One of the girls?

-Lydia?

-Name lots of names. No.

-Amy Childs?

-No.

-Megan?

-Yes, let's go with that.

OK, that is your time up, I'm afraid.

Let's have your three answers.

And say which category you are answering in.

-OK, so we'll go for Strictly Come Dancing 2015.

-Yes.

-Say Scott Mills for that one.

-Scott Mills.

-Yeah.

And I'm A Celebrity,

we're going to take two real punts and say Joey Essex.

-Joey Essex.

-And can you remember Megan's surname?

Megan McKenzie?

Megan McKenzie.

-Nice.

-OK, very good indeed.

Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

Best shot is probably Megan.

Megan McKenzie goes last, OK.

Least likely to be pointless?

-Scott Mills.

-Scott Mills, and then we put Joey Essex in the other one.

OK, well, let's put those answers up on the board in that order, then,

and here they are.

We've got Scott Mills, Joey Essex, and Megan McKenzie.

Well, good luck, three answers there,

one of those could win you that jackpot. £1,250.

Not a bad sum to be taking home.

Chris, what would you do with your share of that?

Well, I think...

Trip to the milliner's, I think.

Yeah, probably get a set of tails and a cane to go with the hat.

Would you go with the red, see that theme through?

Let's not be too garish.

I'm thinking maybe a purple velvet, or something.

More understated, yes.

-Yeah, of course.

-Very good.

-Nathan, how about you?

-I think I'd probably go somewhere in Europe

for a weekend with the girlfriend.

Very good indeed. OK, well, best of luck.

Three good answers. Your first answer was Scott Mills.

In this case we were looking for anyone who danced

on Strictly Come Dancing 2015.

Let's see if it's right.

If it's pointless, Scott Mills will win you £1,250.

Let's see how many people said Scott Mills.

I'm afraid not Scott Mills.

So we move quickly on to your next answer. Joey Essex.

We were looking for anyone who was

on I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here! 2015.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

If it's pointless, it will win you £1,250.

How many people said Joey Essex?

Oh, no!

OK, we move on to your third and final answer,

the one you thought was your best shot

at a pointless answer, Megan McKenzie.

The name swiftly came to you at the end of that minute.

You suddenly got Megan McKenzie.

Let's find out if it's right. We are looking for participants

in I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here! 2015.

If Megan McKenzie is pointless, you leave here with £1,250.

How many people said it? Megan McKenzie.

Oh, bad luck!

Bad luck. Well...

..that was a game effort,

but I'm afraid it yielded no correct answers there.

So I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot,

that will roll over onto the next show.

But it's been great having you here. Great sports.

And you get to take home the Pointless trophy.

-So very well done indeed. Chris and Nathan.

-Thank you.

Sorry, gents, it's been great fun.

It's been a roller-coaster ride, I think I would describe it as.

Scott Mills was in Strictly in 2014.

Joey Essex was in I'm A Celebrity in 2013.

Megan McKenzie, your guess very much as good as mine.

LAUGHTER

Ferne McCann was in I'm A Celebrity,

but she would have scored you four points.

Let's look at the pointless answers, shall we?

Only two for I'm A Celebrity.

Brian Friedman, the dancer,

or Susannah Constantine from Trinny and Susannah.

Both pointless answers.

Four pointless answers for Celebrity Big Brother.

The X Factor contestant, Christopher Maloney.

Kim Kardashian's mate, Jonathan Cheban.

They were the pointless answers there.

Also four pointless answers for Strictly.

Anthony Agogo, the boxer.

Iwan Thomas, a pointless answer.

The lovely Jamelia, she's my favourite.

And the lovely Kirsty Gallacher as well. Also a pointless answer.

Well done if you got any of those at home.

Also, well done if you're wearing a big red hat at home, too.

Thank you very much indeed.

Well, Chris and Nathan, it's been great having you here,

but sadly they didn't win our jackpot today

which means it rolls over to our next show

where we will be playing for £2,250. There it is.

Join us next time to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me, goodbye.