Episode 54 Pointless

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and a very warm welcome to Pointless,

where the lowest scorers are the biggest winners.

-Let's meet today's players.

-APPLAUSE

Welcome, Karl and Mario. You are our first pair this afternoon.

How do you two know each other?

Well, we've known each other for about seven years.

We met through our dear friend John.

Our friendship developed when John went travelling to South America

and he insisted that me and Karl bonded

in his absence and since then, we've been good mates.

-It's a bit weird, but it's pretty much how it happened!

-Very good.

-Where are you from, Karl?

-Originally from Stoke-on-Trent.

-Been living in London now for five years.

-And what do you do?

I am an M&E engineer.

Basically, do building maintenance, look after air conditioning.

-So if it gets a bit cold in here...

-Which it just might.

I was assuming it was cold cos Mario's come in a scarf!

-You never know. Better prepared, I think! I've got an umbrella, just in case.

-Just in case!

-Very best of luck.

-Thanks very much.

Next, we welcome back Ken and Angela. Everyone gets two chances to reach our final.

-Remind us how you did last time.

-We went out on the first round, sadly.

-You did. I couldn't believe it!

-No.

Classical and opera singers.

You'd think that would be our favourite subject(!)

-LAUGHTER

-I would have thought! Oh, dear!

Ken, what are you hoping is going to come up?

I'd like a little bit of sci-fi, maybe, classic films.

Both areas I do know something about,

rather than classical opera singers!

-And Angela?

-Yeah, films for me.

I love films. Literature, I'm happy with that.

My favourite films, probably, of all time -

obviously, the three best films of all time -

-are The Magnificent Seven...

-Yeah.

Love Actually, which is a great comedy, right?

-And The African Queen.

-Oh, The African Queen! Fabulous film!

-It's broad, a broad range.

-Yeah.

I've been told I'm broad before, thank you!

-LAUGHING:

-Well, it's lovely having you back.

Next, we welcome Sheridan and Stacey. How do you know each other?

I've known Sheridan for 16 years.

-For the last seven, she's run my hair salon in Selby, as my manageress.

-Your manageress!

-Sheridan, what's she like as a boss?

-Um... Very loud!

-LAUGHTER

-Very bossy.

-That's good for a boss.

-Very kind, as well.

-Ah!

-Loud, kind and bossy!

-Yes.

-What more could you ask for?

-The very best of luck to the pair of you.

-Thank you.

Finally, welcome back Phil and Mike. This is your second crack at the Pointless final.

-Remind us how you did.

-We did OK. We got to the head-to-head.

Got knocked out in that round, so nearly to the final.

-But we'll always remember what the ingredients of kedgeree are.

-You certainly will.

-Phil, remind us what you do.

-I work for a shipping and forwarding company in Felixstowe.

Importing and exporting, dealing with Customs.

-What are your hobbies?

-A number of hobbies.

I get involved in the theatre. I do a lot of amateur dramatics.

But also, I collect signed photographs of celebrities.

Alexander, you are hanging in my toilet at the moment!

-I hang around there a lot! Am I?

-LAUGHTER

You're in the Rogues' Gallery. You are!

-Am I in good company?

-Yeah! You've got Ralph Fiennes there.

Ricky Gervais and, er... LAUGHTER

-Mike, remind us what you do.

-I'm a primary school teacher.

-I teach nine to 11-year-olds.

-Oh, yes.

With a very broad range of knowledge.

You wouldn't have thought so from the last show!

But this show, boy, are we gonna see it?

-Well, very best of luck.

-Thank you.

There's one person left for me to introduce.

He is obscurity in a suit and shoes.

-He's my Pointless friend. He's Richard.

-Hiya.

And WHAT shoes, if I might say!

Suit, shoes but no trousers, as always.

Should be a good show today.

We HAVE got film coming up.

Angela's got eight grandchildren, 17 great-grandchildren and one great-great grandchild.

That's correct, Richard. Yeah.

-She's amazing!

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

-She's going to have to earn that jackpot and, if she does, it's not going to go round.

-N-no!

It's mine, all mine! LAUGHTER

Lovely to have someone wearing a scarf. That's a first. We've had a few hats.

Phil and Mike were in the head-to-head, and often you go all the way next go.

So I suspect they are the pair to beat.

Thank you, Richard. We put all our questions to 100 people.

We are after the obscure answers they didn't give.

Everyone's trying to find a pointless answer that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so we add £1,000.

Today's jackpot starts off at £3,500.

AUDIENCE: Oooh!

-Right, let's play Pointless.

-APPLAUSE

In the first round, each of you must give me one answer

and you cannot confer.

Whichever team has the highest score will be eliminated.

An incorrect answer will score the maximum of 100 points.

Our first category this afternoon is...

Can you decide in your pairs who's going first, who's going second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

Let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

..as they could.

Any feature film made for cinema for which Russell Crowe received an acting credit prior to 2011.

Short films, TV films, documentaries don't count,

but voice performances do.

Any Russell Crowe film, and there are 32 on the list.

Thanks very much, Richard.

Karl and Mario, you all drew lots, and today you get to go first.

-Have you seen a lot of Russell Crowe films?

-I've seen a few.

Um... L.A. Confidential?

-Well, you're hoping to score as few points as possible.

-Yes.

-You've seen L.A. Confidential?

-Years ago. I know I've seen it.

It was a while ago so I'm hoping that...

-I THINK he was in it.

-We'll find out.

-We'll find out!

Is that right and, if it is, how many people said L.A. Confidential?

Well done, Mario. It's right.

Wow!

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

That's a great score. Very well done, Mario. Four points.

Well played, Mario. From 1997, the film that made him a star in America.

-Kim Basinger won an Oscar in the same film.

-Thanks very much.

Now then, Angela.

-Russell Crowe films. You must have seen a few.

-I have. Yes.

It's just knowing one that won't get too many points.

Um... 3:10 To Yuma.

3:10 To Yuma. Let's see if it's right.

And, if it is, let's see how many people said it.

It's right.

Look at that!

-CHEERS AND WHISTLES

-Very, very well done.

-LAUGHING:

-That's a brilliant answer! One point, Angela.

From 2007. Russell Crowe and Christian Bale. Have you seen it?

-Yes, I did.

-I thought it was rather good. Did you enjoy it?

-I liked the original film of it better.

But that's cos I'm old!

-1957 was the original, with Glenn Ford.

-That was good, that.

Back when you only had seven or eight great-grandchildren.

I didn't have any great-grandchildren then.

I was practising how to get children at the time.

LAUGHTER

I can't believe I said that!

LAUGHTER

You all right, Ken?

Right, Sheridan. We're looking for Russell Crowe films.

-What's the most obscure...?

-I only know one.

It will be The Gladiator. That's the only one I know.

You're hoping to score as few points as possible.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Gladiator.

-It's a lot better than 100.

-Yes.

-60, very good.

Quite a big score for a film round. He won the Oscar for Gladiator.

It's the only one I've seen.

-Perfectly good answer.

-Quite a high score. Phil.

We come to you. I have a feeling you're probably quite good at films.

I'm not too bad on films. Not that hot on Russell Crowe films.

One springs to mind, the only one I can think of

apart from the ones already said, A Beautiful Mind.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many people said A Beautiful Mind.

It's right.

Not a bad score, Phil. 17.

Well done, Phil. From 2001, he plays mathematician John Nash.

He got an Oscar nomination for that one.

We're halfway through the round, let's take a look at the scores.

Well, it's a very broad field.

Angela and Ken, looking fantastic! That was an amazing answer, Angela.

-Thank you.

-Very well done.

-Mario, another great answer.

-It was the scarf.

It was the scarf, quite possibly, that did it.

Then we travel up to 17, where Phil and Mike are looking pretty good.

Then 60, Sheridan and Stacey.

-You are way ahead, so Stacey...

-We're winning!

Keep up that high scoring, you might win an exit from the show.

Stacey, you'll have to find a really good obscure Russell Crowe film.

It's not going to happen? It might dawn on you.

You never know. OK, can the second players please take their places at the podium?

Remember, we are looking for Russell Crowe films.

Mike, Phil gave us a great answer with A Beautiful Mind.

I'll go for his earliest film I can remember, Romper Stomper.

-Stacey, that's the one you were thinking of(!)

-Yeah!

-Bad luck.

If you can get below that red line with Romper Stomper,

you are through to the next round.

I have a feeling this might go a long way down. Romper Stomper.

You're through to the next round.

That's a great answer! Romper Stomper scores two.

Takes your total up to 19.

From 1992, probably the first film where anyone had seen Russell Crowe.

He plays a neo-Nazi skinhead. Lovely film for a primary school teacher(!)

Romper Stomper, a great answer. Stacey, we come to you.

-Russell Crowe films.

-I only knew two and they've gone.

This is always my favourite bit.

Stacey's going to have to make up the name of a film.

I'm going to go for a cartoon kind of film, for the voiceover.

I don't know if it's right but... I'm going to go Madagascar.

-Madagascar.

-Yeah.

-That could be a brilliant answer.

It could be. You are the high-scorers on 60.

Let's see if Madagascar is right and, if it is, how many people said it.

Oh! Bad luck!

I'm afraid that is an incorrect answer.

You score the maximum of 100 points.

That takes your total to 160, I'm afraid. Richard.

Yeah, good news though, Sheridan. Now you're miles in the lead!

Very good! Now, then. Ken, Angela, you are through to the next round.

No matter what you say, Ken.

However, there's got to be a couple,

must be some pointless Russell Crowe films.

No doubt there are, but I'm not great on Russell Crowe films.

But your mum did so well! The lowest score in the first pass.

Yeah. I'm relieved about that. Very relieved!

-I'm just gonna have to play safe.

-OK.

-Because I don't want to get 100 again!

-So I'm going to go Robin Hood.

-Robin Hood. Did you ever see it?

-Yes.

-Did he sound Irish or what?

-"What" most of the time!

Let's see how many people said Robin Hood.

Not a bad score at all for Robin Hood.

Takes your total to 26. Richard.

Well done, Ken. From 2010. He was supposed to be attempting a Midlands accent.

-A shocking accent but a good answer.

-So we come to you, Karl.

The high-scorers are Stacey and Sheridan on 160 points.

There's no way you can overtake them even if you made something up.

What I had in mind have gone!

I'm going to have to stick to the old animation theme. I'm gonna say...

-Ice Age.

-Ice Age.

-Yeah.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many people said Ice Age. Good luck, Karl.

Ooh! Bad luck!

I'm afraid that's incorrect. Not that it matters.

It scores 100 points. Takes your total to 104. Richard.

Not in Ice Age. Not in Madagascar. Let's look at some of the pointless answers on the list.

There's quite a few...

..The last two, Australian films...

Let's look at the most popular answers. We've already heard them.

A Beautiful Mind, number three.

Ken Gave us Robin Hood, that was number two.

And Sheridan gave us 60 points for Gladiator,

the most popular.

At the end of round one, the losing pair with the highest score,

it's Sheridan and Stacey!

-Russell Crowe films.

-Don't like the man.

He's only good-looking in Gladiator cos he's got that outfit.

Nyach!

What would have been the best, best possible subject for you?

-Music.

-Music, generally?

-Travel.

-Hang on! Which is it to be?

-I like music and travel.

-World music, then, maybe?

-Maybe.

-Hm.

-No. Not really.

-Maybe not.

Well, we shall see you again next time when, I'm sure, you will stay with us for much, much longer.

-Thanks very much for playing.

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

For the remaining three pairs, it's time for round two.

Only two pairs can make it to the head-to-head, so one team will leave at the end of this round.

So the category for round two is...

Can you decide in your pairs who's going first, who's going second?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

Our question for round two this afternoon concerns...

..We're about to show you a list of museums and galleries.

We asked 100 people to tell us which cities they are located in. Richard.

We'll show you six museums and galleries on each pass.

If you give us an incorrect answer, the wrong city, you'll score 100 points.

See how many you can get at home.

So we are looking for the city in which these museums and galleries are found.

We have got...

..I'll read those one more time...

OK, Mario. There are the museums and galleries.

I want a nice obscure one, and you to tell me which city it's found in.

They are looking pretty obscure from here. Um...

I will have to hazard a guess.

Uffizi, it reads Italian.

So I would go Uffizi, Milan?

You're saying Uffizi, Milan.

As always, you're looking to score as few points as possible.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many people said Uffizi was in Milan.

Bad luck, Mario. That's an incorrect answer.

That scores you the maximum of 100 points.

Unlucky, Mario and Mario's scarf. Not in Milan.

-I won't give you the answer in case Angela or Phil want the same question.

-Now, Angela.

You got the best answer on that last pass.

I think you'll be able to pull one out the bag again.

There's only one that I'm...

I think I know where two of them are.

I think, really, that I'm going to go for the Ashmolean Museum,

which I believe is in Oxford.

The Ashmolean, you are saying, is in Oxford.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people knew that.

Well done, Angela. That's right.

A wonderful score!

Very well done, you. Ashmolean, Oxford. Richard.

Very well played, Angela. It was founded in 1683.

It's Britain's oldest public museum.

-Can I ask you a question, Angela?

-You certainly can.

-You've got 17 great-grandchildren.

-Yeah.

How does one go about remembering the names?

-You have a good memory.

-Can you reel them off?

I certainly can, if this is what you want.

LAUGHTER Right, my great-grandchildren are...

Leonard and Sylvia, which are my son's two grandchildren.

Um, right... And then there is... Just a second!

Do you know? I could go off you, Richard! I really could!

I just...

I thought you were fantastic. Do you know what...?

I believe that you can name all 17. I won't put you through it.

I thought this because, when I was coming on the show,

they said to me, "Why would you like to come on the show?"

I said, "Because Richard's sense of humour cracks me up."

I then said, "Of course, Alexander, you wouldn't kick him out of bed, would you?"

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

How did you...? How did you break that foot again?

-I tripped over some fresh air!

-You weren't kicking anyone out of bed?

-That's for me to know and you to find out.

-OK!

Now then, Phil. We're looking for the cities in which these museums and galleries are found.

There are the museums and galleries.

I need a nice obscure one. I have a feeling you know all of these.

You're wrong, Alexander! But thanks for your confidence.

Talk us through these cultural landmarks.

OK. There's obviously one there which is quite...obvious.

-The British Museum one.

-You don't have to be coy. You can say where.

The British Museum's in London.

However, I might take a punt on another one

to get a low points one.

I'm gonna go...

Cos of the title of the Kunsthistorisches Museum,

German, I'm going to say Berlin for that one.

Kunsthistorisches Museum, Berlin.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people knew that answer.

Kunsthistorisches Museum, Berlin.

Bad luck, Phil.

I'm afraid that is an incorrect answer.

-Richard.

-Yeah, not Berlin, I'm afraid.

It's in Vienna, the Kunsthistorisches Museum.

It's a museum about the history of art, in Vienna.

Let's look at the rest of them. Mario, the Uffizi IS in Italy.

It's in Florence. It would have scored you 11 points.

-Kelvingrove, Alexander?

-Glasgow.

The most visited museum in the UK outside London, Kelvingrove...

..Not many less than 100.

Very well done if you got the Kunsthistorisches Museum, the best answer on the board.

We're halfway through the round. Let's look at the scores.

There again, Angela and Ken! The strongest players.

Then we zip up quite substantially to 100 points where Mario and Karl

and Phil and Mike are drawn.

So, Karl and Mike, you'll have to fight this out

to see who stays with us and who leaves

at the end of this round.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

We're going to put six more museums and galleries on the board.

We have got...

..Let me read those again...

We're looking for the cities in which these are located.

You're trying to find the one that the fewest of our 100 people knew.

Mike, you're the high-scorers, joint high-scorers.

The one which stands out, which I think might be OK, is the Fitzwilliam in Cambridge.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people knew that answer.

Well done.

Very well done!

Takes your total up to 107.

-Richard.

-Yeah, founded by the 7th Viscount Fitzwilliam of Merrion.

Fitzwilliam, Cambridge. He gave it all his art and antique collection.

Now, Ken. We're looking for the cities in which these museums and galleries are found.

Your mother set you up fantastically well.

The high-scorers are Mike and Phil on 107.

If you can score 86 or less,

you are through to the next round.

I'm going to have to play safe.

I'll hate myself for it if it's too many.

Anne Frank House in Amsterdam.

Anne Frank House, Amsterdam. Here's your red line, nice and high.

Let's see if Anne Frank House in Amsterdam will get you below that.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many people said that.

You're through.

-Well done.

-A surprisingly low score. That scores you 36 points.

-Takes your total up to 56. Richard.

-Very well played, Ken.

Open to the public in 1960, Anne Frank House.

Thanks very much, Richard.

Now, Karl and Mario. You are on 100 points.

The high-scorers are Mike and Phil.

If you can score six or less,

Karl, you are through to the next round.

Anything over six points, we will be saying goodbye.

-Not my strongest...

-Talk us through the board, Karl.

Galleries not really me strongest subject, and museums.

I'm going to have to go with Walker Art Gallery.

-In Leicester.

-The Walker Art Gallery in Leicester, you're saying.

You're on 100 points. Here's your red line. Quite low, I'm afraid.

If the Walker Art Gallery is in Leicester,

you could be through to the head-to-head.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many people said it.

Bad luck, Karl.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer,

taking your total up to an unbeatable 200 points!

-Richard.

-It's actually in Liverpool.

Well worth a visit. Would have scored three points.

If you'd said The Louvre, you wouldn't have got through.

It scores a pretty hefty 79. It's in Paris, of course.

-The Hermitage, do you know that, Alexander?

-Moscow, is it?

St Petersburg. I went recently. It's extraordinary.

If you get the chance, you should definitely go. Scored 11 points.

Galleria Borghese is in Rome.

The Walker Art Gallery is the best answer. Well done if you said that.

Thanks very much, Richard.

The losing pair at the end of round two, I'm afraid, is Karl and Mario, 200 points!

A tough category if you don't know your galleries and museums.

But it is looking good for next time when, hopefully, we'll have more subjects you're comfortable with.

Meanwhile, thanks very much for playing. Great contestants.

For the remaining pairs, things get even more exciting in the head-to-head.

Ken and Angela, Phil and Mike, you made it to the head-to-head.

Only one pair can make it to today's final and play for the jackpot which currently stands at £3,500.

You're going head-to-head on the best of three questions.

Each pair gives me just one answer, and you are now allowed to confer.

Find an answer that scores less than the other pair to win that question.

The first pair to the best of three plays for the jackpot.

Let's play Pointless.

OK, here's your first question.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

..as they could.

We're looking for any of the 13 male golfers who've been world ranked Number One in the official rankings

from when they started in 1986 to the beginning of 2011.

OK. Thanks very much.

Ken and Angela, cos you played best so far, you get to go first.

WHISPERING

-We have an answer from Ken and Angela.

-Seve Ballesteros.

Seve Ballesteros. OK. So, Phil and Mike.

You can now talk out loud.

-Ernie Els, is it?

-Ernie Els, shall we go for?

-It seems like a good answer.

-Padraig Harrington?

-Could be.

-Go him.

-We'll go for Ernie Els.

-Ernie Els.

So we have Seve Ballesteros and we have Ernie Els.

Seve Ballesteros. Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said it.

Ooh, very good.

APPLAUSE

Very well done. Lovely low score there.

Ernie Els.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said that.

Ooh, well done!

Very good. Ernie Els beats it.

So, Phil and Mike are up one-nil.

-Richard.

-Two good answers there. There were four pointless answers.

Let's take a look at all the names on the list.

Tom Lehman, the American,

World Number One for one week!

Nick Price, the Zimbabwean.

Ian Woosnam was pointless...

..Vijay Singh is the oldest man to have reached World Number One at 41.

Greg Norman was World Number One for 331 weeks, scored six...

..Tiger Woods has been World Number One for 623 weeks.

-A lot of weeks!

-More than ten years worth of weeks.

Here is your second question.

Ken and Angela, you have to win this to stay in the game.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

..as they could.

We're looking for any countries that belong to the EU whose flag consists of just two colours.

They can have a crest or coat of arms as well, but just two colours.

And that's prior to the start of 2011.

-Phil and Mike, you get to go first.

-WHISPERING

The one that comes to mind which we think only has two colours, red and white, is Poland.

OK. Poland, you say.

Ken and Angela, you can now talk out loud.

Not doing great! We're not doing great! Um...

We'll go for Greece?

-Yeah?

-Going to have to.

-Greece.

-You're going to take Greece. Phil and Mike have gone for Poland.

You are going for Greece. Phil and Mike, if you win this, you are through to the final.

Ken and Angela, you have to win this to stay in the game.

Poland, let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said Poland.

APPLAUSE

11 for Poland! Ken and Angela have said Greece.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many people said it.

You have to win this to stay in the game.

Will it go down as far as Poland?

Good luck, anyway.

Bad luck. Yes, Poland wins that one.

After two questions, Phil and Mike are through to the final, two-nil.

Unlucky, Ken and Angela. You came up against a very good team.

Three answers would have beaten Poland.

All the ones that beat it were red and white as well...

..The losing pair at the end of the head-to-head, I'm afraid, it's Ken and Angela.

Oh, dear! We've had a FANTASTIC game with you, though.

You've been amazing. Brilliant low answers in both of the first two rounds.

Strange to say, I was going to say Malta and then I thought,

"I'm not 100% sure and I KNOW with Greece!"

It's been lovely having you on the show.

-Brilliant contestants. Thank you so much for playing.

-Thank you very much.

For Phil and Mike, it's time for our Pointless final

and the chance to win our jackpot of £3,500!

Congratulations, you fought off the competition and have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

APPLAUSE

CHEERING

You now have a chance to win our jackpot, which stands at £3,500.

CHEERING

To win that money, you have to find a pointless answer that none of our 100 people could think of.

We haven't had any pointless answers today. Find one now to go home with that money.

First, you've got to choose a category from these three options...

I don't think it's going to be fashion, is it?

-I'm quite fashionable in my own way.

-Yeah! Baseball's a no-go.

-Unless it's names of teams. I think it's got to be authors.

-I think so.

-Authors, it is.

-Yeah.

Let's find out what the question is. Any area where you feel comfortable?

-Ones we know would be nice!

-Enid Blyton's quite good!

Children's authors could be OK.

-Anything like that would be good.

-Let's find out.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

..as they could.

We're looking for any person who's been awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature up to the 2010 recipient.

When there's been more than one, we will accept each as an individual answer. Best of luck.

I'll echo that. Best of luck. You have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £3,500 is for one of those to be pointless.

-Your 60 seconds start now.

-Who are you going to say?

-Harold Pinter and Seamus Heaney.

-I was going to say Salman Rushdie.

-Did he win the Nobel Prize for Literature?

-I think he has done.

-He's the only one I can think of.

-They're the two I can think of!

-There you go, then.

-Yeah.

-That's three straight away. Absolutely.

-Stop the clock?

-Yes.

-OK. Clock is stopped.

Well, that was quick!

We were looking for winners of the Nobel Prize in Literature. I need three answers.

-Er... Seamus Heaney.

-Seamus Heaney.

Harold Pinter.

Harold Pinter.

-And Salman Rushdie.

-And Salman Rushdie.

Which do you reckon is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-BOTH: Seamus Heaney.

-We'll put him up last.

Which is your least likely to be pointless?

-Salman Rushdie. Quite a lot of people would have...

-Fair enough.

Salman Rushdie first, Seamus Heaney last and Pinter in the middle.

Here they are.

We were looking for the winners of the Nobel Prize in Literature. This is your least confident answer.

You only have to find one pointless answer to win that £3,500 jackpot.

Let's see if Salman Rushdie is right and, if it is, how many people said it. How confident are you?

Er, not... Now it's up there, I'm not that confident!

-We'll see how it goes.

-He won SOME prizes.

-Yeah.

-Has he won that one?

Let's see. Salman Rushdie.

-Well, you weren't that confident in that one.

-No.

Even if he had won, you thought that was going to be a popular choice.

You have two left, two you're certain of.

-Pretty sure.

-He is.

-I hope so!

-We're looking for winners of the Nobel Prize in Literature.

This is your second answer, Harold Pinter.

You're very confident of this.

This has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot.

£3,500! What would you do with £3,500?

Well, I have a baby daughter.

She's just five months old. I'd love to do some nice things for her.

-AUDIENCE: Ah!

-Very good. Phil, top that!

I'm going to spend it!

I've got a five-year-old son and it's his mother's wish to take him to Lapland.

Ah! Fantastic! Very good.

He'll want to go if he hears this on the TV, so we have to win!

-You better had.

-Have to take him anyway now.

Harold Pinter was your second answer.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many people said Harold Pinter.

Well, it's right.

-You were very confident it was right.

-Come on!

It has to go all the way to zero.

BOTH: Oh!

APPLAUSE

But then, he won it very famously. People would have remembered that picture of him in his hat.

Seamus Heaney, on the other hand,

far more anonymous, I'm sure.

-Hope so.

-Thanks, Alexander!

You only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

Seamus Heaney is or isn't going to carry you over that threshold.

I don't think there seemed to be any discussion. This was the answer you were most confident with.

-Yeah.

-Think so.

-Obviously, it has to be right.

Then it has to be pointless for you to win that £3,500 jackpot.

-Fingers tightly crossed.

-Absolutely.

EXHALES

-Let's win this!

-Seamus Heaney. Is it right?

How many people said it? This for the jackpot of £3,500.

Very, very best of luck.

-It's right.

-Come on!

Down to zero! Come on!

Your third and final chance to win our jackpot...

Oh, no!

Good answers!

Well, you put them in the right order!

Unfortunately, you couldn't find that all-important pointless answer.

-You have been fantastic contestants but you do, of course, take home our Pointless trophy.

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

-Richard.

-Guys, you played so well throughout.

That is tough luck. Some big names were pointless answers.

Gabriel Garcia Marquez, WB Yeats. I'll show you a few more...

..Eugene O'Neill, the American playwright, won it in 1936...

..John Galsworthy, author of The Forsyte Saga.

Luigi Pirandello, famous for Six Characters In Search Of An Author.

Samuel Beckett was a pointless answer!

And the very first winner of all, the French essayist Sully Prudhomme.

Very well done if you got any of those, and very tough luck, guys.

We do have to say goodbye, Phil and Mike, but thank you so much for playing. Great contestants.

Nobody's won our jackpot so it rolls over.

On the next show, we will be playing for £4,500.

-Join us next time. Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

-APPLAUSE

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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