Episode 36 Pointless


Episode 36

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Transcript


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APPLAUSE

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Thank you very much indeed.

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I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

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the quiz show where obvious answers mean nothing

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and obscure answers mean everything. Let's meet today's players.

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APPLAUSE

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Welcome back, Jenny and Jeannie, you were on the show last time.

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Everyone gets two chances to reach the final. This is your last chance.

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Remind us what happened.

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Well, Alexandra, in the last round,

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I think we gave a doughy answer to a bread topic and...that was it.

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-Bread?

-Yes.

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-You were done by naan?

-We were done by naan.

-Right, OK.

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-Whose idea was it to come on Pointless?

-Mine.

-Very good.

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-Did Jeannie take much persuading?

-No, no she didn't.

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She agreed very quickly and very willingly

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because we both enjoy the show and enjoy your banter between the two of you.

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How... how very flattering,

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-slightly humbling.

-Didn't know we did banter.

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I thought we did barely concealed hostility.

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I'm sitting here enjoying the fact that Jeannie called you Alexandra.

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LAUGHTER

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I have learnt to accept that as my name.

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It is frequently given.

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It IS a girl's name.

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-But I'm, you know, I'm big enough to cope with that.

-I beg your pardon.

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No, don't worry at all. Don't you worry at all.

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Well, lovely to have you back,

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-very best of luck to the pair of you.

-Thank you.

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Next we welcome Pat and Rob. Now, how do you know each other?

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Well, Alexander, we're from Hull.

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I've got three children, the youngest of which is Pat.

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The youngest is Pat.

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Was Pat the first one you asked to join you as your teammate?

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I set up the actual thing. My dad just tagged along in the end.

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-Tag along.

-Tag along, I like that.

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Very good. What do you do, Pat?

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I work for the Citizens Advice Bureau as an advisor.

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I also work part-time in a bar to pay the bills.

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How long have you been doing the Citizens Advice?

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-Last four months.

-Very good. Now, Rob, what do you do?

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-I work for the Royal mail.

-What you do?

-I'm a delivery driver.

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Right. We've had a pretty good representation

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from the Royal Mail, actually.

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-Yeah, we have.

-Very good indeed. A lot of post people.

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It's almost as if they're often home in the afternoon, isn't it?

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Watching Pointless.

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Very best of luck Pat and Rob, it's great to have you here.

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-Next we welcome Liz and Tom. How do you know each other?

-Hi, Alex and hi, Richard.

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We both met at Northumbria University three years ago

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in freshers' week and we've been a couple ever since.

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-Ever since freshers' week? Wow.

-Poor Liz.

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-That's fantastic.

-Mm.

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-You haven't been out with anyone else for the whole of your university time?

-No.

-No.

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-That's fantastic.

-What could possibly go wrong?

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LAUGHTER

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-Now, Liz.

-Hi.

-What do you do?

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-Um... Well, I've just finished university.

-Indeed.

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And I'm a part-time sales assistant.

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Very good, and, Tom, um... I have to commend you on that T-shirt.

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I mean, I am a massive fan of Roy Orbison myself so I...

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-LAUGHTER

-Tell us about the T-shirt, Tom.

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Well, I mean, it could be recycled for Roy Orbison, I suppose,

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but it's for Richard. Richard Osman over there. Big fan.

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Sorry, Alex, you're one's at home.

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It was a choice between the two. Richard pipped you, I'm afraid.

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-Yeah.

-This is not at all awkward.

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LAUGHTER

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Very good. Welcome to the show.

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It's fabulous to have you here.

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Finally, we welcome back James and Steve. You were also on the show last time.

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-Remind us how you know each other.

-We're work colleagues.

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I work as an admin assistant for a building company and Steve's the catering manager.

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-Remind us what happened to you last time.

-We went out in the second round.

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Um...it was fictional robots.

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We knew some of the answers but we chose the wrong one.

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Oh, there was one very famous fictional robot

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-on there that was Pointless.

-That's right. Marvin.

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Everyone stepped carefully around Marvin, didn't they?

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And, actually, had you said Marvin it would have added money to the jackpot

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-and kept you in the game.

-Exactly.

-Well, that's Pointless for you.

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There's just no predicting, no predicting.

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What would you like to see come up this afternoon, James?

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James Bond films, that would be brilliant.

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Or geography, that would be pretty good. My mind just smiles

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when a geography question comes up on this show. It's brilliant.

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I normally find a good pointless or two in there.

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Very good. Of course, geography,

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Steve, you're the son of a teacher man.

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-Son of a geography teacher, that's right.

-Son of a teacher man.

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I'd like sport or '80s pop music. That was my era.

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'80s pop music. Very good. Best of luck to you.

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We'll find out more about you in the show. There's only one person left for me to introduce.

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He's the toast of Essex, Billericay's favourite son,

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he's my Pointless friend.

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-He's Richard.

-Hiya.

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APPLAUSE

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-Billericay Osman, in fact.

-Yes, if you like. If you like.

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-Yes.

-Should be a good show today. We've got two returning pairs,

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neither of whom really covered themselves in glory last time,

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so I would say a very open field.

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Round One, one of those classic, proper geeky Pointless rounds.

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-I think a lot of people will like it.

-I'm looking forward to it already.

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We put our questions to 100 people but this is Pointless,

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so we're after the obscure answers they didn't get.

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To stay in the game and win our jackpot,

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all our players need to do is score as few points as they can.

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Everyone's trying to find a pointless answer,

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an answer that none of our 100 people gave, and each time that happens,

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we'll add £250 to the jackpot.

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Nobody won the jackpot last time so we add another £1,000 to that,

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so, today's jackpot starts off at £2,500.

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APPLAUSE

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Right, let's play Pointless.

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APPLAUSE

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In the first round, each of you must give me one answer

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and you cannot confer with your partner.

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The team with highest score will be eliminated. If anyone gives me an incorrect answer

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they will score the maximum of 100 points.

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So try and avoid that. OK, our first category this afternoon is...flags.

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-Oh, Jenny. Have I said the wrong thing?

-Yes.

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Flags. Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

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who's going to go second.

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CHATTER

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Whoever's first, step up to the podium.

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Let's find out the question. Here it comes.

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We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many national flags

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that contain the colour green as they could.

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-National flags that contain the colour green. Richard.

-Any country whose national flag

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contains the colour green. By country, we mean sovereign state, a member of the UN.

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It has to be a substantial plane of green so we won't accept

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countries that have a little bit of green on a crest or something.

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A substantial plane of green. Any country in the world. And there's plenty.

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Thank you very much, Richard. Jenny and Jeannie,

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you all drew lots before the show.

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This afternoon, you get to go first.

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Jenny, oh, dear, I saw that face you pulled.

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-Not a good subject for you?

-No.

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So, Jeannie, a nice obscure flag with a substantial plane of green.

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-That sounds lovely, Richard.

-Nice, innit?

-Substantial plane of green.

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-Well... I'm going to go for South Africa.

-South Africa?

-Yes.

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OK, very good indeed. South Africa says Jeannie.

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Let's see if it's right and if it is,

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let's see how many people said South Africa.

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Well, it's right.

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Still going down, Jeannie.

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13. That's a great score.

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APPLAUSE

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Very well done.

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-South Africa.

-South Africa's got six colours on its flag.

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-Red, yellow, black, white, blue and green.

-Thank you very much.

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Now, Pat, you've come dressed in green.

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Can you find an obscure flag with green in it?

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I hope I can, I hope this is right, because if it's not,

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I will look like an idiot.

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-Green is my favourite colour, so, that's pretty cool.

-That's good.

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I'm going to go for Libya.

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Libya, says Pat. Let's see if that's right.

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You hope to score as few points as possible.

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Let's see how many people said Libya.

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It's right.

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Down it goes.

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Very, very well done, Pat. It's a great answer.

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APPLAUSE

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Well done, three points for Libya.

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Very well played, Pat. Exactly right.

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Well done, Pat. Three points.

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So, Liz, we're looking for a nice obscure flag

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-with a plane of green in it.

-Yeah.

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You have a sort of face on

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that suggests you're not loving this category.

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I'm just trying to think back to Eurovision

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because that's the only geography I know.

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Nothing wrong with that.

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I think I've got one, and I don't know if it's right,

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but I'm going to go with Albania.

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Albania. What do you think, Tom?

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I have no idea, you know, Alex.

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If not, we've had a lovely time, we had a lovely day out,

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it's been a nice trip down and, hopefully, we'll, erm...

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see you again soon.

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Albania, says Liz.

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There's a vote of confidence for you, Liz. I think it's a fantastic answer.

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You must score as few points as possible. Is it right,

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and if it is, let's see how many people said Albania.

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-Oh! Bad luck, Liz.

-Sorry.

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I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer, which means you score the maximum of 100 points.

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You may well not be the last person to score 100 points in this round. Richard.

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Sorry, Liz. It's red with two black eagles, the Albanian flag.

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Or a black double-headed eagle, but it's much the same thing.

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-I like the fact that Tom is calling you Alex.

-I'm liking Alex.

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I like the Alexandra and Alex.

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-I might start calling you Lexie.

-Lexo.

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-You like?

-Yeah. Brilliant. We'll have that.

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-Away you go, Lexie.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

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Now, then. James.

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I want a lovely obscure flag from you, James,

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with a substantial plane of green.

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And I hope to oblige, Alexander. I've been thinking very hard.

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I'm a big fan of the show, seen every show and I seem to recall

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the answer I'm giving was a pointless answer five times in the very first series of the show

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and it's going to be the Central African Republic.

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The Central African Republic, a great friend of this show.

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You're hoping to score as few points as possible, James.

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If that is right and doesn't go down to at least single figures,

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I'll be very surprised. Let's see if it is right,

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and let's see how many people said it.

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Well done, James, it's right.

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Down it goes, still going...

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Yes!

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Very well done, James. That's a pointless answer.

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It adds £250 to today's jackpot, taking the total up to £2,750

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and it scores you nothing.

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-Well done on all counts. Richard.

-Well done, James.

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Proof that watching Pointless makes you clever. Very good.

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The Central African Republic, the pointless country that keeps on giving.

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Blue, white, yellow, red and green in the Central African Republic flag.

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-Splendid.

-What about that?

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We should do a live special from the Central African Republic.

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I would love that.

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Tell you what I'll do, I'll find out where it is and then we'll go there.

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I don't know...

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I don't know which continent it's on but it sounds...sounds central.

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-I think it's East Asia, I think.

-Let's go there, let's go there!

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I'd like to go to other places, but I won't mention them in case

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they have flags with a substantial plane of green.

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We're halfway through the round so let's take a look at the scores.

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That fantastic answer from James,

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oh, richly deserved, zero there.

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Wonderful. Then we come up to 3 from Pat

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for his Libyan flag. Then up to 13. Great answer from Jeannie.

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Then I'm sorry to say, Liz, Albania has cost you dear.

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ALEXANDER SIGHS

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100 points.

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So, then, Tom,

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you have to hope somebody else scores 100 points

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and that you can score a Pointless in the next pass.

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That way, you might make it through to the next round.

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We come back down the line,

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can the second players take their places at the podium.

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Remember, we're looking for flags containing the colour green. Steve.

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I've only got one answer in my head, I must be honest.

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Listen, Tom and Liz are on 100 points,

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you are on no points,

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which means if you can score 99 or less

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you are through to the next round.

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-Well, I hope I'm right with Italy.

-Italy, says Steve.

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Tom is nodding.

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Here's your red line nice and high.

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If you can get below it, you're through to the next round.

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Let's see if it's right. If it is, how many people said it.

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Very well done, you've done it, Steve.

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46 for Italy.

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46 takes your total up to 46. Richard.

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Green white and red, of course, the Italian flag.

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The other end of the scale from the Central African Republic.

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Very good. Tom, this is the moment of truth.

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We're looking for flags that contain the colour green.

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You're the high scorers on 100 points.

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Right, well, you probably couldn't have picked the worse subject for the two of us here

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and I don't have a clue if I'm right

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but I'm going to go with Kenya.

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Kenya.

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OK, well, let's see if that's right.

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There's no red line for you I'm afraid so let's see

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is Kenya right and if it is how many people said Kenya.

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It's right.

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Well done, Tom, down it goes.

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Look at that!

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APPLAUSE

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Tom, that was a heroic effort there.

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-APPLAUSE

-Kenya scored you one point and takes your total to 101.

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-Very, very well done. Richard, 101.

-Yes, very well played, Tom.

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Red, black, green and white, the Kenyan flag.

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-Just about kept themselves in it.

-Yes, indeed. Now, then,

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Rob and Pat, you were on three,

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the highest scorers remain Tom and Liz on 101.

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If you can score 97 or less, Rob, you're in the next round.

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I can't remember. I've got to go for...

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a country that celebrates its greenness.

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I'll have to go for Ireland.

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Ireland, says Rob. Ireland.

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Here is your red line.

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If you get below that red line with Ireland,

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you're through to the next round. Let's see if it's right,

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and if it is, how many people said Ireland.

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-You've done it.

-Yes!

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Well done, Rob. 58.

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58 said Ireland. That brings your total up to 61. Richard.

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A safe answer and you're through to the next round.

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Of course, the Republic of Ireland's flag.

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-Jenny.

-Yes.

-I'm remembering the face you pulled when this round was announced.

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You are on 13. The high score is 101, Tom and Liz.

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If you can score 87 or less, you are through to the next round.

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Believe it or not, Kenya was about the only one I was sure of,

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because I was there on safari last year. So now I'm stuck.

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I'm going to have to take a punt.

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Ooh, this is music to Tom and Liz's ears.

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Um... Jamaica.

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Jamaica. There's your red line. Below that, you're through to the next round.

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Is Jamaica right? How many people said it?

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It is right and you are through to the next round. Very well done.

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17. That's a great score! 17 takes you both up to 30.

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Richard.

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Well played, Jenny. Green, yellow and black, the Jamaican flag.

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There are a huge amount of pointless answers on this board. Let's take a look at a few of them.

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Loads of other pointless answers. There's so many, I'm just going to go through the ones that rhyme.

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There's Sudan and Oman, there's Mali and Malawi and Gambia and Zambia.

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All of those have green in their flags. Most of the African countries have green in their flags somewhere.

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Thank you. How about our high scorers?

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Let's look at the ones most of our 100 people said. We've heard some already.

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Very well done if you got any of those pointless ones at home.

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Thank you. So at the end of round one, the losing pair with the highest score,

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I'm sorry, Liz and Tom. Liz, you did what you had to do.

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You took a wild stab in the dark. Sadly, Albania doesn't have a plane of green on its flag.

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Tom, heroic turn from you. You had to score low and you did.

0:17:260:17:31

That was a great answer. Sadly, though, such heroism wasn't enough to rescue you.

0:17:310:17:37

We have to say goodbye but we will see you again next time when I'm sure we'll see much more of you.

0:17:370:17:42

Meanwhile, thanks so much for playing. Tom and Liz. Brilliant.

0:17:420:17:46

For the remaining three pairs, it's time for round two.

0:17:480:17:50

There's only room for two pairs in the head-to-head,

0:17:580:18:00

so one of the teams will be leaving at the end of this round. Try and make sure it's not you.

0:18:000:18:05

Our category for round two is:

0:18:050:18:07

Oh, Jeannie, it's your turn. The UK charts.

0:18:080:18:12

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second?

0:18:120:18:15

Whoever's first, please step up to the podium.

0:18:170:18:20

Our round two question concerns:

0:18:230:18:25

-Richard.

-On each pass we're going to show you six albums that entered the UK charts between 2000 and 2010.

0:18:310:18:37

We asked 100 people to name the artist or singer who released those albums.

0:18:370:18:41

Give us an obscure answer, you'll score fewer points.

0:18:410:18:44

If you give us an incorrect answer, you'll score 100 points.

0:18:440:18:47

It's going to be 12 albums and all 12 artists or singers to name at home.

0:18:470:18:52

Thank you. We are looking for the artists who released these Top 40 albums of the Noughties.

0:18:520:18:57

We have got:

0:18:570:18:58

I'll read those again.

0:19:070:19:08

-Jenny. Is this better or worse than flags?

-Worse.

-Right.

0:19:160:19:21

You need to give me an answer and as always on Pointless,

0:19:210:19:23

you're looking for the answer that the fewest of our 100 people gave.

0:19:230:19:29

Um...

0:19:290:19:30

Graduation, Lady Gaga.

0:19:300:19:33

Graduation, Lady Gaga.

0:19:340:19:37

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, how many people said it.

0:19:370:19:42

Bad luck, Jenny.

0:19:450:19:46

As I think you suspected, that is an incorrect answer, which means you score the maximum 100 points.

0:19:460:19:52

I'm sorry. Richard.

0:19:520:19:53

Not the right answer. I won't give the rightone in case the others want to have a go with it.

0:19:530:19:58

-Pat, we come to you.

-When I stepped up to the podium, I thought I was going to bottle it

0:19:590:20:06

but I know four out of six, so I think I'll go for Elephunk and that being Black Eyed Peas.

0:20:060:20:14

Black Eyed Peas, Elephunk. Let's see if it's right,

0:20:140:20:16

and if so, how many people knew that answer.

0:20:160:20:19

Very well done.

0:20:210:20:22

49.

0:20:240:20:26

49 for Black Eyed Peas.

0:20:290:20:32

Good answer. Their breakthrough album. Included Where Is The Love. First one to feature Fergie as well.

0:20:320:20:37

-Plenty of people knew it.

-Very good.

0:20:370:20:41

Steve, you're the last one so you can fill in all the blanks.

0:20:410:20:44

Erm... I'll fill in one of the blanks.

0:20:440:20:47

I think I know one and I think I can guess another.

0:20:470:20:50

I guess Justified is Justin Timberlake but I could be wrong.

0:20:500:20:54

But I'm going to go,

0:20:540:20:55

and it's the only one I know cos it's not my era,

0:20:550:20:58

American Idiot is Green Day.

0:20:580:21:00

-American Idiot, Green Day.

-The rest I don't know.

0:21:000:21:03

It doesn't matter, if that's right. Let's see. Green Day. Is it right? How many people knew that?

0:21:030:21:08

It's right!

0:21:100:21:11

52.

0:21:130:21:15

-52. Quite a high score there.

-Highest score on the board, actually.

0:21:170:21:22

From 2004, number one album that's been made into a musical, won various Tony Awards.

0:21:220:21:26

Let's have a look at the rest of them. If you had gone for Justified,

0:21:260:21:30

you're right, it's Justin Timberlake. It would've scored you lower points too. Would've scored you 35.

0:21:300:21:35

Graduation is Kanye West. That would've scored you 24.

0:21:350:21:39

Ta-Dah, it sounds like a Pet Shop Boys album,

0:21:390:21:41

but it's the Scissor Sisters. Would've scored you 17.

0:21:410:21:44

The best answer on the board is Is This It. You know that one? Another American guitar band.

0:21:440:21:49

-Strokes?

-The Strokes. Well done if you said The Strokes. You'd have scored 11 points.

0:21:490:21:54

We're halfway through the round so let's take a look at those scores.

0:21:540:21:58

49 is our lowest score on this pass, from Pat. Up to 52 for Steve

0:21:580:22:03

and up substantially to Jenny and Jeannie on 100.

0:22:030:22:09

You're not as far ahead as you might've been.

0:22:090:22:12

We've had much lower scoring rounds.

0:22:120:22:14

Anything can happen on the next pass provided you, Jeannie, find a nice obscure album from the Noughties.

0:22:140:22:22

(I don't think so!)

0:22:220:22:23

Well, who knows?

0:22:230:22:25

Back down the line. Can the second players take their places?

0:22:250:22:28

We're going to put six more Top 40 albums from the Noughties on our board. Here we are.

0:22:320:22:37

We have got:

0:22:370:22:39

I'll read those one more time.

0:22:460:22:48

We're looking for the artists who released these Top 40 albums of the Noughties,

0:22:550:22:58

and you're trying to find the one that the fewest of 100 people knew.

0:22:580:23:03

James, you've been good so far. What's the board looking like?

0:23:030:23:06

Not good, I'm afraid.

0:23:060:23:08

I'm not much of a music listener and albums a bit a worse.

0:23:080:23:13

I think I know Good Girl Gone Bad but I'm not certain enough,

0:23:130:23:16

so I'm going twith the only one I'm sure of, Back To Black, which is Amy Winehouse.

0:23:160:23:20

Back To Black, Amy Winehouse, you say? Let's see how you do.

0:23:200:23:23

The highest scorers are Jeannie and Jenny on 100.

0:23:230:23:26

If you can score 47 or less with this, you're definitely through to the next round.

0:23:260:23:30

There's your red line. Below that, through you go.

0:23:300:23:34

Back To Black, Amy Winehouse. Is that right? How many people said it?

0:23:340:23:38

Well done. It's right.

0:23:410:23:42

56. That takes your total up to 108.

0:23:450:23:48

-Richard.

-Yeah, big score for Amy Winehouse.

0:23:500:23:53

Won five Grammys in 2008, including the title track and Rehab as well.

0:23:530:23:57

Thanks very much. Rob, you are on 49.

0:23:570:24:02

The highest scorers at the moment are James and Steve on 108.

0:24:020:24:05

If you can score 58 or less, you are through to the next round.

0:24:050:24:10

We're looking for the artists who released these albums in the Noughties.

0:24:100:24:15

I'll have a go at In Rainbows. Radiohead.

0:24:150:24:19

In Rainbows, Radiohead, says Rob. There is your red line.

0:24:190:24:24

Let's see if Radiohead get you below it.

0:24:240:24:26

In Rainbows. Is it by Radiohead, and if so, how many people knew it?

0:24:260:24:31

Yes, it's right.

0:24:330:24:34

Through you go.

0:24:360:24:37

Very well done indeed, Rob.

0:24:400:24:41

That's a fantastic answer and our lowest score of the round.

0:24:450:24:48

10 takes you up to 59. Richard.

0:24:500:24:53

Well played, Robert. Again, released in 2008.

0:24:530:24:56

They released it as a digital download. You could pay what you wanted for it.

0:24:560:25:00

-How much did you pay for it?

-My cats ran across my keyboard when I was doing it. I paid £8,000.

0:25:000:25:05

-Worth every penny.

-Every penny of that eight grand.

0:25:070:25:11

Now then. Jeannie. We're looking for the artists who released the albums in the Noughties.

0:25:110:25:19

Here is the moment where you could snatch victory from the jaws of defeat.

0:25:190:25:23

The high scorers on 108 are James and Steve.

0:25:230:25:25

If you can score seven or less, through you go.

0:25:250:25:29

You can think out loud if you like, talk us through the board.

0:25:290:25:33

I can't talk you through the board because I don't know one there.

0:25:330:25:38

So I'm just going to have a big guess and it's probably going to be totally wrong.

0:25:380:25:43

I'm going to go with Only By The Night, The Arctic Monkeys.

0:25:430:25:49

Only By The Night, The Arctic Monkeys. How brilliant would it be if that were right?

0:25:490:25:55

-It would be a miracle.

-That would just be my favourite moment on the whole of Pointless.

0:25:550:26:02

Only By The Night, Arctic Monkeys. Is it right?

0:26:020:26:05

How many people said it? There's a red line for you and it's there.

0:26:050:26:09

-If you get below the line, it'll be the best thing ever.

-It will.

0:26:090:26:15

Only By The Night, Arctic Monkeys. Is it right?

0:26:150:26:19

Oh!

0:26:190:26:20

Bad luck, Jeannie. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer which means you scored a maximum of 100 points,

0:26:220:26:28

taking you're total up to 200. You join our illustrious 200 Club.

0:26:280:26:32

-Richard.

-I think you both struggled manfully with that round.

0:26:320:26:36

An impressive display.

0:26:360:26:39

You will kick yourself when I tell you who Only By The Night is by.

0:26:390:26:43

-It was by the Kings of Leon!

-Oh!

0:26:430:26:46

Can you believe it?!

0:26:470:26:49

You could've said Lady Gaga as well and told us The Fame.

0:26:490:26:54

That would've scored you 42 points.

0:26:540:26:57

-Good Girl Gone Bad. Who did you think it was, James?

-Was it Shakira?

0:26:570:27:02

No, it's by the Central African Republic, I'm afraid.

0:27:020:27:05

-Hard not to get that one!

-It's by Rihanna. That would've scored you 51.

0:27:070:27:12

The one that could've got you through, Jeannie, and again you'll kick yourself,

0:27:120:27:16

if you said Funeral by Arcade Fire. Six points would've got you through.

0:27:160:27:22

Your favourite Canadian multi-instrumentalists, Arcade Fire.

0:27:220:27:25

Well done if you said Arcade Fire at home. It's the best answer on the board.

0:27:270:27:32

Thank you. At the end of round two. the losing pair with the highest score, Jenny and Jeannie.

0:27:320:27:37

-I'm sorry. This was a stinker of a round for you, wasn't it?

-Yes.

0:27:370:27:41

Dear, oh, dear.

0:27:410:27:43

It was bread last time and albums of the Noughties this time.

0:27:430:27:47

Next time, maybe.

0:27:470:27:50

Next time, maybe. If only there were a next time.

0:27:500:27:53

What will you be taking away from your Pointless experience?

0:27:530:27:56

It's been great fun. We've met some really nice people.

0:27:560:27:59

The only shame for us is we haven't got to see you at your best.

0:27:590:28:02

I'm sure there would've been rounds which you could've dazzled us.

0:28:020:28:06

You've been hobbled by these, frankly, hopeless questions we've been giving you.

0:28:060:28:10

I'm sorry about that, but thanks very much for playing.

0:28:100:28:13

You've been brilliant contestants. Jenny and Jeannie. Brilliant.

0:28:130:28:17

For the remaining two pairs things are about to get even more exciting now as we enter the head-to head.

0:28:170:28:23

Very well done, Pat and Rob and James and Steve. You've made it through to the head-to-head.

0:28:300:28:35

Only one pair can make it through to today's final

0:28:350:28:38

and play for the jackpot, which currently stands at £2,750.

0:28:380:28:42

For each question, each pair needs to give me just one answer.

0:28:470:28:49

You are now allowed to confer.

0:28:490:28:52

Just come up with an answer that scores less than the other pair and you'll win that question.

0:28:520:28:57

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for today's jackpot.

0:28:570:29:00

Let's play Pointless.

0:29:000:29:01

OK. Here is your first question. We gave 100 people 100 seconds

0:29:070:29:11

to name as many rhinoceroses as they could.

0:29:110:29:16

-Rhinoceroses. Richard.

-Not individual Rhinoceroses.

0:29:160:29:20

We need any of the five living species of rhinoceros.

0:29:200:29:23

Pat and Rob, cos you've played best throughout the show so far, you get to go first.

0:29:230:29:29

Rhinoceroses.

0:29:310:29:33

We haven't got that many answers since it's a very specific subject in rhinos-ih-si... rhinocesaur?

0:29:340:29:41

Rhinoceri.

0:29:410:29:43

But me dad said one, which must be right, the white rhinoceros.

0:29:430:29:48

The white rhinoceros. Sounds good to me. James and Steve.

0:29:480:29:52

I don't know. It's a tricky one, this.

0:29:540:29:56

White's an obvious one, so is black.

0:29:560:29:59

Steve mentioned blue but I don't know if that's right.

0:29:590:30:02

-What do you want, mate? Black or blue?

-Black.

0:30:020:30:06

-Are you sure black's right?

-Black, yes black. All right.

-Black.

0:30:060:30:10

-Black please, Alexander.

-We have white and we have black.

0:30:100:30:13

Pat and Rob went with white. Let's see if that's right and if it is

0:30:130:30:17

let's see how many people said white rhinoceros.

0:30:170:30:20

It's right.

0:30:210:30:23

69.

0:30:250:30:27

But it's in there. It's in there.

0:30:270:30:30

APPLAUSE

0:30:300:30:31

The black rhinoceros, say James and Steve.

0:30:310:30:34

Let's see if that's right.

0:30:340:30:36

Let's see how many people said it. Will it go below 69?

0:30:360:30:41

Black rhino.

0:30:410:30:42

It's right.

0:30:440:30:45

Yes, you've done it. Very well done. 51.

0:30:450:30:49

APPLAUSE

0:30:490:30:50

51 beats 69. Which means after one question,

0:30:520:30:56

Steve and James are ahead 1-0. Richard.

0:30:560:30:58

Yes, well played, guys. No blue rhino out there.

0:30:580:31:01

Let's take a look at all five and see what you could've won with.

0:31:010:31:05

The Sumatran rhino, there's only 250 of them in the world,

0:31:050:31:09

the smallest rhinos, would've scored six points.

0:31:090:31:11

The Javan rhino, also one of the world's rarest mammals,

0:31:110:31:15

just in Java and Vietnam, with eight.

0:31:150:31:17

The Indian would've scored you 15.

0:31:170:31:19

There's black on 51 and white with 69.

0:31:190:31:22

It's a mistranslation of wide, it's got a very wide mouth, the Dutch word, white rhino.

0:31:220:31:28

So it's not white at all.

0:31:280:31:30

But just wide.

0:31:300:31:31

OK. Here is your second question,

0:31:310:31:33

Pat and Rob, you have to win this question to stay in the game.

0:31:330:31:37

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

0:31:370:31:39

to name as many Oscar-winning British actors since 2000.

0:31:390:31:43

Oscar winning British actors, Richard.

0:31:430:31:45

We're looking for the name of any British actor or actress who's won an acting Oscar

0:31:450:31:50

from 2000 through to the 2011 ceremony.

0:31:500:31:52

That's Best Actor or Best Supporting Actor, males or females.

0:31:520:31:56

OK, thanks very much, Richard.

0:31:560:31:58

James and Steve, you get to go first this time.

0:31:580:32:00

We're going to go with Tilda Swinton, Alexander.

0:32:000:32:04

Tilda Swinton. Very good. Tilda Swinton.

0:32:040:32:08

Pat and Rob, what are you going to go for?

0:32:080:32:11

Just took our answer.

0:32:110:32:13

-Sorry.

-I'm going to have to go for an obvious answer, Kate Winslet.

0:32:130:32:17

Kate Winslet. We have Tilda Swinton, we have Kate Winslet.

0:32:170:32:21

OK, James and Steve, we've gone for Tilda Swinton.

0:32:210:32:24

Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how many people said Tilda Swinton.

0:32:240:32:28

It's right.

0:32:300:32:31

Down it goes. Very low.

0:32:350:32:37

-Oh, fantastic!

-APPLAUSE

0:32:370:32:40

That's a pointless answer. That adds another £250 to today's jackpot,

0:32:430:32:48

taking the total up to a lovely, round £3,000.

0:32:480:32:51

Unbelievable.

0:32:510:32:53

And that, I'm afraid that gives Pat and Rob a score of nothing to beat.

0:32:550:33:01

-What's the odds of that?

-Yes.

-He got that, exactly the same.

0:33:010:33:04

-And that was going to be yours.

-Yes.

0:33:040:33:07

Bad luck, bad luck, bad luck.

0:33:070:33:09

So, Pat and Rob, you have a mountain to climb here

0:33:090:33:12

and this is the mountain that will keep you in the game.

0:33:120:33:15

Kate Winslet. Let's see if that's right

0:33:150:33:17

and if it is, let's see how many people said Kate Winslet.

0:33:170:33:20

The best you can hope for is a draw here.

0:33:200:33:23

It's right.

0:33:240:33:25

No, 22.

0:33:290:33:31

APPLAUSE

0:33:310:33:33

Very, very bad luck.

0:33:330:33:35

Tough luck, tough luck.

0:33:380:33:40

That means after two questions only,

0:33:400:33:42

James and Steve are through to the final 2-0.

0:33:420:33:44

-Richard.

-Well played, James and Steve. They're good, aren't they?

0:33:440:33:48

There is another pointless answer that would've tied the point

0:33:480:33:52

and it's a fairly well-known one as well.

0:33:520:33:54

-Well done at home if you said Daniel Day Lewis.

-I said that too.

0:33:540:33:58

Won Best Actor for There Will Be Blood.

0:33:580:34:00

Tilda Swinton won Best Supporting Actress for Michael Clayton.

0:34:000:34:04

Rachel Weisz, Best Supporting Actress for The Constant Gardener, would've scored you 21.

0:34:040:34:09

Christian Bale, Best Supporting Actor for The Fighter, one.

0:34:090:34:12

Jim Broadbent, Best Supporting Actor for Iris, two.

0:34:120:34:15

Michael Caine, Best Supporting Actor for Cider House Rules, three.

0:34:150:34:18

Catherine Zeta Jones, Best Supporting Actor in Chicago.

0:34:180:34:21

Kate Winslet, who won Best Actress for The Reader. 22,

0:34:210:34:24

Helen Mirren, Best Actress for The Queen, 47

0:34:240:34:27

and Colin Firth, Best Actor for The King's Speech, 53.

0:34:270:34:30

Very well done if you got one of those pointless answers.

0:34:300:34:33

-Very, very well done if you got both of them.

-Yes, thank you.

0:34:330:34:37

So, the losing pair at the end of the head-to-head,

0:34:370:34:40

I'm afraid it's Pat and Rob. Oh dear, oh dear.

0:34:400:34:43

That's harsh, isn't it? To have your answer taken.

0:34:430:34:46

But a fantastic and a very hard fought head-to-head,

0:34:460:34:50

dealt with in only two questions, which is rare.

0:34:500:34:53

But it means, when we see you next time, which we look forward to,

0:34:550:34:58

we shall hope for great things from you. Meanwhile, thanks for playing, Pat and Rob. Excellent contestants.

0:34:580:35:03

APPLAUSE

0:35:030:35:05

But, for James and Steve, it's time for our Pointless final and the chance to win our jackpot of £3,000.

0:35:050:35:11

APPLAUSE

0:35:110:35:13

Congratulations, James and Steve. You fought off all the competition

0:35:180:35:21

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy, so very well done.

0:35:210:35:25

APPLAUSE

0:35:250:35:27

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot. At the end of today's show,

0:35:300:35:35

-the jackpot stands at £3,000.

-APPLAUSE

0:35:350:35:38

Not bad, is it?

0:35:380:35:40

Now, the rules are very simple. To win that money,

0:35:410:35:43

all you have to do is find a pointless answer - an answer none of our 100 people could think of.

0:35:430:35:49

We've had two pointless answers today. You are responsible for both of them.

0:35:490:35:52

James, you gave us Central African Republic in Round One.

0:35:520:35:56

And you've just given us Tilda Swinton, so very well done.

0:35:560:36:00

You only have to find one more -

0:36:000:36:02

one more and you will leave here with that money.

0:36:020:36:06

First, though, you've got to choose a category.

0:36:060:36:08

You can choose from these three options. They are...

0:36:080:36:11

-Dare I ask, mate? Cricket, please, Xander.

-Cricket.

0:36:140:36:17

-Certainly not the other two.

-Not a moment's thought there.

0:36:170:36:20

Well, we see cricket matches at Headingley so it's obvious.

0:36:200:36:24

-Let's go cricket.

-Cricket it is. Let's find out what the question is.

0:36:240:36:28

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name

0:36:280:36:30

as many cricketers who have taken more than 300 Test wickets as they could. Richard.

0:36:300:36:36

We're looking for any bowler

0:36:360:36:37

who's taken over 300 wickets in Test cricket

0:36:370:36:40

up to the beginning of May 2011. So not one-day internationals.

0:36:400:36:44

Just bowlers who've taken over 300 wickets in Test cricket,

0:36:440:36:47

up to the start of May 2011.

0:36:470:36:50

You now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

0:36:500:36:53

And all you need to win that £3,000

0:36:530:36:55

is for just one of those answers to be pointless. Your 60 seconds start now.

0:36:550:37:00

Right. So can rule out Warne - too obvious.

0:37:000:37:04

What about Kapil Dev?

0:37:040:37:06

He's an all-rounder. Pretty well-known, I suspect.

0:37:060:37:09

-Shoaib Akhtar?

-Possibly.

0:37:090:37:12

I was trying to think of some West Indians.

0:37:120:37:15

-Courtney Walsh - he was very high.

-What about Ambrose?

0:37:150:37:19

Ambrose also took a lot but he's well-known.

0:37:190:37:22

-What about the '70s or '80s possibly when they were good?

-Malcolm Marshall?

0:37:220:37:27

I'm trying to think of some Australians.

0:37:270:37:30

I think maybe an outside chance, possibly Jason Gillespie?

0:37:300:37:33

-He got 250 in the 2005 Ashes.

-Yes.

0:37:330:37:39

-Did he play on after that?

-He did a bit.

0:37:390:37:44

-What about Malinga?

-No, I'm sure he's not that high up.

0:37:440:37:48

He's never retiring is Malinga. Never retired.

0:37:480:37:50

What about Laker, the England guy?

0:37:500:37:53

-Jim Laker, he took a lot of wickets - a spinner.

-Five seconds left.

0:37:530:37:57

-I like that. Shoaib Akhtar.

-Jim Laker and Jason Gillespie.

0:37:570:38:01

OK, there's your minute up.

0:38:020:38:04

We were looking for bowlers who've taken more than 300 Test wickets,

0:38:040:38:09

as of 2011. And I now need your three answers.

0:38:090:38:13

OK. We're going to go for Jim Laker,

0:38:130:38:16

Shoaib Akhtar

0:38:160:38:18

and the Aussie, Jason Gillespie.

0:38:180:38:22

Of those three,

0:38:230:38:25

which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

0:38:250:38:28

-I think Laker.

-Laker.

-OK, we'll put Laker last.

0:38:280:38:32

Akhtar first, I think.

0:38:320:38:33

Shoaib Akhtar first.

0:38:330:38:36

And Jason Gillespie in the middle.

0:38:360:38:37

OK, so let's put them up on the board in that order.

0:38:370:38:40

And here they are.

0:38:400:38:42

There they are.

0:38:450:38:47

OK, we were looking for bowlers who had taken

0:38:470:38:49

more than 300 Test wickets, as of 2011.

0:38:490:38:54

You said this was your least confident answer.

0:38:540:38:57

Shoaib Akhtar, there it is.

0:38:570:38:59

You only have to find one pointless answer, remember, to win that £3,000 jackpot.

0:38:590:39:03

Let's see how many people said Shoaib Akhtar

0:39:030:39:07

and is that a correct answer?

0:39:070:39:11

Oh!

0:39:120:39:13

Ooh. An incorrect answer, as it turns out.

0:39:150:39:18

Not a pointless answer. And I'm afraid that didn't give us

0:39:180:39:21

an opportunity to see how much our 100 people knew about cricket.

0:39:210:39:26

So, you only have two more shots at that jackpot of £3,000.

0:39:260:39:29

What would you do with £3,000 if you went away with it now?

0:39:290:39:32

Holiday family for me. Take my wife off somewhere nice.

0:39:320:39:36

-Very good indeed. James, how about you?

-I'd use it towards a new car.

0:39:360:39:40

-My car's a bit out of it now, so a nice new car, yes.

-Very good indeed.

0:39:400:39:43

OK, well, fingers crossed. We are looking for bowlers

0:39:430:39:47

who have taken more than 300 Test wickets as of May 2011.

0:39:470:39:50

Let's hope nobody said your next answer. This has to be pointless

0:39:500:39:54

if you're going to win that jackpot of £3,000.

0:39:540:39:57

Jason Gillespie. You knew he'd taken 250 as of 2005.

0:39:570:40:02

Fingers crossed. Jason Gillespie, is it right? How many people said it?

0:40:040:40:09

No!

0:40:110:40:13

Another incorrect answer.

0:40:150:40:17

We only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

0:40:170:40:20

But luckily this is your most confident shot.

0:40:200:40:22

You said Jim Laker was the person to put last. You thought he was your best shot at a pointless answer.

0:40:220:40:27

We're looking for bowlers who've taken more than 300 Test wickets

0:40:270:40:32

as of May 2011. You said this was the answer you had the most faith in, Jim Laker.

0:40:320:40:36

There he is at the bottom of the table. This has to be pointless.

0:40:360:40:39

Very, very, very best of luck, James and Steve.

0:40:390:40:42

Jim Laker. Is it right? How many people said it?

0:40:420:40:45

Oh, no!

0:40:490:40:50

Oh, bad luck.

0:40:520:40:54

APPLAUSE

0:40:540:40:57

Oh, that's bad luck.

0:41:010:41:03

Unfortunately, you didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer.

0:41:030:41:07

I'm afraid you don't win the £3,000 jackpot which rolls over onto the next show.

0:41:070:41:11

But you have been fantastic contestants and you do get to take home our Pointless trophy.

0:41:110:41:15

APPLAUSE

0:41:150:41:17

-Richard.

-Tough luck, guys. You played so well throughout the show.

0:41:210:41:25

I think maybe you over-thought this, to be honest. There are some simpler answers that were pointless.

0:41:250:41:30

Just to go through your answers, Jim Laker took 193 Test wickets.

0:41:300:41:34

Jason Gillespie has 259. He'll stay there unless he makes an unlikely comeback.

0:41:340:41:38

Shoaib Akhtar, 178 up to May 2011.

0:41:380:41:41

Some of the names you said while you were talking,

0:41:410:41:44

Curtly Ambrose would have scored three. Kapil Dev scored one.

0:41:440:41:47

If you'd said Malcolm Marshall, you would have just won the jackpot.

0:41:470:41:51

He was a pointless answer, I'm afraid.

0:41:510:41:53

Let's take a look at all the pointless answers.

0:41:530:41:56

And you'll recognise every name on it, I suspect.

0:41:560:41:59

Allan Donald of South Africa, Bob Willis of England,

0:41:590:42:02

Chaminda Vaas of Sri Lanka - all pointless answers.

0:42:020:42:05

Daniel Vettori of New Zealand, still playing now,

0:42:050:42:07

Dennis Lillee of Australia, Lance Gibbs of the West Indies.

0:42:070:42:11

Makhaya Ntini of South Africa would have been a pointless answer,

0:42:110:42:15

as is Malcolm Marshall, and as is Waqar Younis.

0:42:150:42:18

-Sorry.

-Yeah, over-thought it, I think.

0:42:180:42:21

-Very well done if you got any of those at home.

-Oh, bad luck.

0:42:210:42:24

-You knew nearly all those names, didn't you? I say "nearly", I think you knew all of them.

-Mm-hmm.

0:42:240:42:29

-You even said Marshall.

-And Willis.

-And Willis.

0:42:290:42:34

Hey-ho. We got the trophy.

0:42:340:42:36

Oh, well, I tell you what - you did it honourably

0:42:360:42:38

because actually you were thinking very, very hard about it.

0:42:380:42:41

You tried to find the most obscure answers. They were so obscure, they were wrong.

0:42:410:42:45

Well, unfortunately, we do have to say goodbye to James and Steve.

0:42:450:42:49

-But it's been brilliant having you on the show. Fantastic contestants. Thank you for playing.

-Thank you.

0:42:490:42:54

APPLAUSE

0:42:540:42:57

Nobody's won our jackpot today, so it rolls over,

0:42:570:42:59

which means on the next show we will be playing for £4,000.

0:42:590:43:03

APPLAUSE

0:43:030:43:06

Join us then to see if someone can win it.

0:43:070:43:09

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

0:43:090:43:11

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

0:43:110:43:13

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0:43:310:43:33

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0:43:330:43:35

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