Episode 47 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless

where obvious answers mean nothing and obscure answers mean everything. Let's meet today's players.

Welcome back, Lynne and Dudley. Everyone gets two chances to reach the Pointless final.

This is your last chance. Remind us what happened.

I, in the first instance, gave an answer that I shouldn't have given.

-You misheard your instruction from Lynne?

-I misheard.

-You said "hydrogen". You should have said "nitrogen".

-Yes.

Our opponents said "nitrogen" and unfortunately, they got it.

We can put all that behind us. Today is a new day. What do you like to do in your spare time, Dudley?

Both Lynne and I are members of Rotary International.

In fact, I'm the present President of our local Rotary Club

and Lynne is our immediate past President.

Wow! You took over the chains of office from Lynne?

-Yes.

-What sort of nick were they in?

-They were pretty good.

-It was a hard act to follow, I've got to say.

-Lynne's very much into charity work abroad, especially in India.

-Right.

I've been over to India twice, vaccinating babies against polio

as part of the Global Eradication of Polio Project.

-That's fantastic. It's great to have you on the show again and very best of luck to you.

-Thank you.

Next, we welcome Cliff and Nick. How on earth do you two know each other?

You can see that we're identical twins, so we've known each other before we were born.

-Since conception you've known each other.

-And I'm the oldest by 90 minutes.

-That is quite a long time.

-I was enjoying myself after he'd gone.

-"It's nice in here!"

-LAUGHTER

-Anyway, what do you do, Cliff?

-I'm a correspondence delivery officer.

You're a...? Yeah, I see.

That's "postman" in English, isn't it?

-Is that genuinely what you're now called?

-That's what I call myself. It's the posh variety.

Nick, how about you? What do you do?

I'm a design draughtsman for a transformer company.

Nick, if I told my son that you worked in a factory where they made Transformers,

-he would be over the moon.

-He can't have one.

-I'd take him down there, he'd be so excited.

-Then bitterly disappointed.

That would be like when my parents finally caved in and took us to Piccadilly Circus.

LAUGHTER

What a bitter disappointment that was! Exciting, the lights and everything...

But where's the elephant?

It's great to have you on the show. Welcome to you both. Best of luck.

Next, we welcome Malcolm and Alison. How do you two know each other?

-We're brother and sister.

-Where are you from?

-We're from Edinburgh up in Scotland.

-Alison, what would you love to see come up?

-Besides history, geography, that kind of thing,

the film Anchorman, the Eurovision Song Contest and the Power Rangers are my three specialist subjects.

Very good. They're firm friends of Pointless, the Power Rangers.

-I look forward to seeing them.

-Malcolm, how about you?

I'm glad you asked that. I'm a cloud enthusiast.

-No?

-Yes. I'm a member of the Cloud Appreciation Society.

You pay your £3 membership, you get a certificate and a badge

-and you're allowed to take photos of clouds.

-Otherwise, you're not allowed to(!)

-No, you have to have a licence.

-You can take photos of clouds? You are kidding me!

-Any cloud.

-Do you have a jacket with a silver lining?

-AUDIENCE GROANS

-No, that's only when you reach the top stage.

What's the best cloud you've ever seen?

Oh, it's hard to choose. They're all personal favourites of mine.

-There was quite a good one out the other day, a nice, wee altocumulus lenticularis.

-I saw that!

-Did you?

-It was amazing.

-Brilliant.

-Best cloud.

-Very good. It's great to have you on the show. Best of luck.

Finally, we welcome back Wendy and Alyson. You were also on the show last time. Remind us what happened.

We went out in the second round.

We'd done really well in the first round and our goal was not to go out in the first round,

so we achieved that, but we got questions on film villains and I chose the wrong one.

-You chose some high-scoring... Lex Luthor and the Child Catcher?

-Yes.

-Two unforgettable villains and, as we discovered, nobody had forgotten them.

-Exactly.

You've now broken the meniscus of the second round,

-so I think this time all the way through to the head-to-head.

-No problem.

What would help you get there? What would be your choice of category?

I would like anything on musicals. I quite like geography. That worked quite well for us.

Very good. Alyson, what would you like to see come up this afternoon?

Something perhaps to do with maths.

-Or geography did us well last time. We've lived in a few different countries.

-That's right.

Your American states were tip-top.

It's lovely having you back on the show. Very best of luck.

We'll find out more about all of you throughout the show. There's only one person left to introduce.

He belongs to a secret order of intellectuals who meet to discuss EastEnders plot lines.

-He's my pointless friend Richard.

-Hiya.

It should be a cracking show. We've got two very strong returning pairs.

Lynne and Dudley were very unlucky in that head-to-head and Wendy and Alyson also very, very strong.

But twins quite often do very well on this show, Cliff and Nick, you'll be delighted to hear.

Round One is a subject no-one has ever asked for in the history of Pointless.

When you've gone along the line saying, "What would you like to see," no-one has ever said this.

-Nor will they ever.

-LAUGHTER

We put all our questions to 100 people before the show,

but we are after the obscure answers they didn't get.

To stay in the game, our players need to score as few points as they can.

Everyone is trying to find a pointless answer that none of our 100 people gave

and when that happens, we add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so we add another £1,000 and today's jackpot starts off at £2,000.

APPLAUSE

Right, let's play Pointless.

In the first round, each of you must give me one answer and you cannot confer with your partner.

The team with the highest score at the end of the round is eliminated.

OK, our first category this afternoon is...

LAUGHTER

Fruit. Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

Let's find out what that first question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many melons as they could.

-Melons, Richard?

-I think I'm right in saying no-one's asked for that?

-Never, ever, ever.

All the correct answers in this round will be varieties of melon.

Splendid. Dudley and Lynne, you all drew lots before the show and, this afternoon, you get to go first.

In this round, we are going to give you a choice of seven possible answers on the board in each pass.

Your first set of seven answers reads like this.

I will read those all again.

At least one of those answers is pointless

and at least one of those answers is incorrect.

Pick one of those incorrect ones and you will score a maximum 100 points.

Remember, we are looking for varieties of melon. What are you thinking, Dudley?

I'm thinking I know absolutely nothing about melons.

But I'll go for Galia.

Galia, you're saying. There it is, one up from the bottom.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how many people knew that answer - Galia.

It's right.

-37.

-APPLAUSE

-37 for Galia, Richard?

-Yeah, a yellow rind and a pale green flesh. It's a hybrid melon.

Very good indeed. Now then, Nick, melons is what we're looking for.

Um...

Oh, it's hard, isn't it?

I think we'll have to have a punt. Casaba.

Casaba. Cliff thinks that's a good punt.

Is it right and how many people said Casaba?

It's right.

Very well done. That's pointless!

APPLAUSE

It adds £250 to today's jackpot, taking the total up to £2,250,

and it scores you absolutely nothing. Richard?

Yeah, very good answer. Yellow rind and white flesh, named after a town in Turkey.

Very good. Thank you. So, Alison W...

We're looking for types of melon.

I have no idea... The answer I'm going to go with, I don't know if it's a melon or not.

It's either a melon or a Japanese Anime character or a Manga character.

So I'm going to go with Kimura.

-Kimura...

-I'm sorry if it's wrong.

Kimura. Let's see if it is right and if it is, let's see how many people said Kimura.

Oh, bad luck, Alison.

-Never mind.

-Kimura is an incorrect answer which means you score the maximum of 100 points. Richard?

Sorry, Alison. Hiroichi Kimura is a Japanese melon farmer

who made the world's first heart-shaped melon.

Wow! Alyson...

-Yes.

-Melons. You can talk us through the whole board and fill in the missing gaps.

I can play very safe and go for "watermelon" which most people will know.

Nutmeg is a herb or spice, so is that also a type of melon?

Charentais, I've heard of, but I don't know if it's a melon.

And Tamara, I've no idea.

I think I'm going to go for Charentais.

Charentais. Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said Charentais.

It's right.

Well done. How far down is it going to go? Still going down.

Well done. One point for Charentais!

APPLAUSE

-Very well done. Richard?

-Yeah, very good answer.

You often eat them with Parma ham or prosciutto, the Charentais melon.

-Let's fill in the board.

-Is that the orange one?

-Yeah, exactly right.

Watermelon, the clue's in the name, although it only scored 72 points.

So 28 people don't know a watermelon is a melon.

And of those other two...

I happen to know that Tamara Mellon is the head of Jimmy Choo.

Yes, Tamara Mellon is the co-founder of Jimmy Choo Shoes, so that was an incorrect answer.

Nutmeg was trying to put people off by sounding like a spice when in fact it is a melon.

-There is such a thing as a nutmeg melon.

-Thank you very much, Richard.

Let's take a look at the scores.

Nick and Cliff are looking very, very strong indeed on nothing,

as indeed are Alyson and Wendy on 1,

then up to 37 for Dudley and Lynne

and then way, way, way up, I'm afraid, where we join Alison and Malcolm on 100.

Malcolm, you have to find a really obscure melon and hope somebody else slips up in the next pass.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK, we're going to put seven more answers on the board.

We are looking for melons and we have got...

I'll read those one more time.

Again at least one of those answers is incorrect and at least one of those answers is pointless,

so try and avoid those incorrect ones if you can. Now then, Wendy...

The high scorers are Malcolm and Alison on 100.

You are on 1, so if you can score 98 or less, you are in the next round.

I'm going to be a coward and play safe because the bar is fairly high, so I'm going to say Cantaloupe.

Cantaloupe, you're hoping that gets you below 98.

There is your red bar. If you're below that, you're through to the next round.

Cantaloupe, is it right, how many people said it?

Well done. You've done it.

Very good. 59.

APPLAUSE

-Richard?

-Yeah, well played, Wendy, safely through.

Named after a castle in Italy, the Cantaloupe.

Splendid. Malcolm, Wendy has done you a sort of tactical favour.

She has removed Cantaloupe from the board, so somebody may have to take a massive punt later on

and they may score 100 points.

-But you also have to take a massive punt because you have to score as low as you can.

-Yes, I do.

-Are you a melonologist?

-I can name one other melon that's up there

and I'm going to have to take a gigantic guess,

so for the reason that it's the most fun to say out of all of those,

I'm going to go with the Cravin melon.

What do you think, Alison?

I don't think I have a leg to stand on. He can do whatever he wants to.

Fingers tightly crossed, Malcolm.

Let's see if Cravin is right and if it is, how many people said Cravin melon.

Oh, no!

-Out in a blaze of glory, Malcolm.

-How embarrassing!

-It's not embarrassing at all.

-That would be a brilliant melon.

-Wouldn't it?

-Cravin.

-It would be a fantastic melon.

-Richard?

-That's the way to go out. Cravin' Melon is an American heavy metal band.

Right. LAUGHTER

Oh, well... Cliff, we come to you. Nick scored a pointless answer in the first pass.

-What about scoring another one now?

-I'll try and match him. I can't let him beat me.

-You can't.

Unfortunately, I was up half the night revising grapefruits, so I don't know much about melons.

So, looking down that list, I'll go for "horned".

-Horned.

-Sounds good to me.

-The horned melon.

Let's see if "horned" is right and if it is, how many people said it.

It's right.

Oh, very well done. You got it!

APPLAUSE

That's pointless. It adds £250 to today's jackpot and takes the total up to £2,500.

It scores you nothing and leaves your total at nothing.

Identical twins, identical scores, double pointless, well done.

It's a sweet melon with horn-like spikes. It's sometimes known as the African horned cucumber.

If you want a name for a heavy metal band, African Horned Cucumber is better than Cravin' Melon.

Very well done. Now then, Lynne...

Melons is what we're looking for.

You are through to the next round whatever happens.

Even if you score 100 points, you are in Round Two.

Let's see if there's another pointless answer. Talk us through the board as well.

I mean, honeydew, that is a melon.

But I'm going to choose one of the others that I don't know.

I'm going to go for Canary.

-You're going to go for Canary?

-Yeah.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people knew that.

There's no red line because you're through. Canary, is it a melon?

It is.

Well done. It's pointless, Lynne.

That adds another £250 to today's jackpot,

taking the total up to £2,750.

It scores you nothing and leaves your total at a very respectable 37.

Very well played, Lynne. The canary melon has bright yellow skin and they're going "cheap".

LAUGHTER AND GROANS

Let's take a look at the rest of the board and fill these in.

The honeydew melon obviously is a melon. Would've scored you 63.

A Galia melon is a hybrid of Cantaloupe and honeydew.

The Ogen melon is named after the kibbutz in Israel where it was first developed. Would've scored you 14.

-Gibson, is that pointless or incorrect?

-I think it's incorrect probably.

Well, Mel Gibson is an anagram of "big melons".

LAUGHTER

It's an incorrect answer. Horned and canary are the pointless answers. Well done if you said those.

Thank you, Richard. At the end of Round One, the losing pair is Malcolm and Alison.

Oh, dear, oh, dear. You did the right thing. You tried very hard with Kimura and Cravin.

They both sound like damn fine melons, but they turned out to be just wrong.

We have to say goodbye to you now, but we'll see you next time. Thanks for playing, Malcolm and Alison!

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

There's only room for two pairs in the head-to-head, so one team will be leaving us after this round.

Our category for Round Two this afternoon is...

Can you decide in your pairs who's going first, who's going second?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, so our question concerns Famous Women And Their Famous Mothers.

-Richard?

-We'll show you a list of six famous women on each pass.

We asked 100 people to name their famous mothers. A nice, obscure answer will score fewer points,

but an incorrect answer will score 100 points. 12 famous women and their mothers to guess at home.

Thank you very much. We are looking for the famous mothers of these famous women and here they are.

You are looking for the one that the fewest of our 100 people knew.

Now, Dudley, what does that list say to you?

That list says to me that I should have stayed in Ormskirk and not bothered coming down the M6.

But I have an idea.

I know Zara Phillips, so I'll go for Princess Anne, the Princess Royal.

Princess Anne, you are saying, as mother of Zara Phillips.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people knew that.

Oh, it's an expensive one, Dudley.

It was safe, but it was only 12 points safer than wrong.

-Richard?

-Yeah, very big score, big risk to take, but if it's the only one you know, it's better than 100.

Indeed. Now then, Nick, remember, we are looking for the famous mothers of these women.

Claudia Winkleman, I should know, I've seen her so many times.

No, I'm sorry.

-I can't even guess.

-We're going to need a guess from you.

Mary Barton for Claudia Winkleman.

Mary Barton. Claudia Winkleman - Mary Barton, says Nick.

Is that right and if it is, how many people said Mary Barton?

Bad luck, Nick.

That's an incorrect answer. I'm afraid you score 100 points.

-Richard?

-I won't give you the correct answer in case the other team want to have a go at that one.

Alyson, you can talk us through all the famous mothers of these famous people, then pick one to submit.

I wish I knew them all.

I do know Liza Minnelli.

I think I'm going to go safe with Liza Minnelli and let Wendy do the trick on the next round.

-Judy Garland.

-Judy Garland for Liza Minnelli.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people knew that.

Yes, it's right.

-49.

-Well done.

APPLAUSE

-49, the best score of the pass. Richard?

-Well done, Alyson.

Let's fill in the rest of the board.

-There's quite a big score for Kate Hudson. Do you know her mum?

-It's Goldie Hawn.

Would've scored you 45 points.

-Jamie Lee Curtis's mother?

-Janet Leigh.

-Janet Leigh from Psycho, Tony Curtis being her father.

13 points. Claudia Winkleman's mother?

-I nearly said Su Pollard. I mean Eve Pollard.

-Exactly right, the writer, newspaper woman. Scored 8 points.

-And do you know Melanie Griffith's mother?

-No.

5 points, best answer. It's Tippi Hedren who starred in The Birds.

-Oh.

-Yeah.

-I didn't know that. Let's take a look at the scores.

We're halfway through the round. The best score of this pass, Alyson and Wendy on 49.

Then we go up to 88 for Dudley and Lynne,

then up a little bit beyond that to Nick and Cliff on 100,

so Cliff and Lynne, it's between you, I would say,

to decide who's staying with us and who's leaving us.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

We'll put six more famous women on the board.

And here is our second list.

I'll read those one more time.

We are looking for the famous mother of these famous women.

You're trying to find the one that the fewest of our 100 people knew.

Wendy, you are the low scorers on 49. The high scorers are Cliff and Nick on 100.

If you can score 50 or less, you are in the next round.

I'm going to go with, um...

..Peaches Geldof

and it is Paula...

I don't know. Paula...

I'm going to kick myself when you tell me.

Stephenson.

Paula Stephenson, you're saying.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how many people said Paula Stephenson for Peaches Geldof.

Bad luck, Wendy, I'm afraid, that's an incorrect answer

which takes your total up to 149.

Richard?

Unlucky, Wendy. I won't give the right answer in case the other two teams want to have a go.

Cliff, we are looking for the famous mothers of these women.

The high scorers are now Alyson and Wendy on 149.

If you can score 48 or less, you are definitely in the head-to-head.

-There's a lot of women I don't know very well and some women...

-Aren't there though?

LAUGHTER

But I'll go with Peaches Geldof, Paula Yates.

Paula Yates.

Paula Yates, says Cliff. There's your red line.

If you get below that red line, you are in the head-to-head.

Let's see if Paula Yates is right and how many people said it.

It's right.

You've done it. Very well done. 40.

-APPLAUSE

-That was all it took.

It takes your total up to 140. Richard?

Yeah, her full name is Peaches Honeyblossom Michelle Charlotte Angel Vanessa Geldof.

Anyway, thank you very much.

So then, Lynne,

we're looking for the famous mothers of these women.

The high scorers, 149, still Wendy and Alyson. If you score 60 or less, you are through to the head-to-head.

-I know all the people up there.

-Talk us through them.

Carrie Fisher, her father was Eddie Fisher.

Her mother was a famous actress, but I can't think of her name.

Chloe Madeley is the daughter of Richard Madeley and Judy Finnigan.

Rachael Stirling, she's the one that I'm not so sure about.

Gwyneth Paltrow, of course, everybody's heard of her,

but the one I'm going for and it is a bit of a punt

is Sophie Ellis-Bextor. Her mother is Janet Ellis.

-Lovely Janet Ellis.

-She used to do Blue Peter.

-Very good indeed.

You want to score 60 or less. There is your red line.

Let's see if Janet Ellis gets you below that red line. Is it right and if it is, how many people said it?

-Yes, she's done it for you.

-High five.

-Very well done.

That scores you 37 and it takes your total up to 125.

-Richard?

-Yeah, very well played, Lynne.

Very lucky you didn't say Chloe Madeley. It is Judy Finnigan, but it would have scored you 64 points.

It would have just seen you losing out.

Do you want to have a go at these? Carrie Fisher?

Eddie Fisher is the father and Debbie Reynolds is the mother.

Would've scored 14 points. Well done if you got that. Gwyneth Paltrow?

-Again her mother is an actress.

-Yes, I know exactly who she is.

-She's got a lovely name.

-Blythe Danner. Would've scored 6 points.

And Rachael Stirling, that's the best answer on the board. Another actress.

-Diana Rigg.

-Diana Rigg, exactly right.

2 points. Very well done if you said that.

Thanks very much, Richard. After Round Two, the losing pair with the highest score, Wendy and Alyson.

-Oh, dear. Round Two last time, Round Two this time.

-That's the way it's meant to be.

It's been lovely meeting you both and thanks for coming on the show. Wendy and Alyson, great contestants!

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining two pairs, things get even more exciting as we enter the head-to-head.

Very well done, Cliff and Nick, Lynne and Dudley. You've made it through to the head-to-head.

Only one pair can make it through to the final and play for the jackpot which stands at £2,750.

Now, for each question, each pair needs to give me just one answer, but you are now allowed to confer.

Come up with an answer that scores less than the other pair and you win that question.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for today's jackpot. Let's play Pointless.

Here is your first question. We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many cities that have held the FIFA World Cup Final as they could.

Cities that have held the FIFA World Cup Final.

We're looking for any city that's held the FIFA World Cup Final

from its inception through to and including the 2010 World Cup.

OK, Cliff and Nick, because you've played best throughout the show so far, you get to go first.

WHISPERING

We'll go for Montevideo.

Montevideo, say Cliff and Nick.

Lynne and Dudley...

Haven't got a Scooby-Doo, me, because I don't know anything about football.

And I know just a little bit less than that.

Go for what you said.

We'll go for Johannesburg.

OK, Johannesburg. We have Montevideo and we have Johannesburg.

Cliff and Nick said Montevideo. Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said it.

Oh, very, very well done.

Nearly our fourth pointless of the show, but one person remembered Montevideo. Very, very good answer.

Lynne and Dudley, you said Johannesburg. Let's see if that's right and if it is right,

if it can go as low as or lower than Montevideo.

Johannesburg?

It's right.

Wow!

Very low score there.

9 for Johannesburg, so after one question, Cliff and Nick are ahead 1-0. Richard?

Well played, both teams, but especially Nick and Cliff.

The first World Cup Final was held in Montevideo in 1930.

There's four pointless answers here. Any of these would have won the points.

Yokohama in Japan in 2002, Solna in Sweden from 1958,

Santiago, Chile, in 1962.

The Pasadena Rose Bowl just outside Los Angeles held the final in 1994.

There's Montevideo on 1,

Bern, Switzerland, 1...

Buenos Aires in Argentina, 7,

Johannesburg, South Africa, 9, absolutely right.

Rio de Janeiro held the deciding game in 1950. It wasn't the final, but it amounted to the same thing.

11 points. Mexico City, 11, Berlin, 14,

Munich, 14, Madrid, 18, Rome, 22,

Paris, 29, and London, 57.

Splendid. Here is your second question.

Lynne and Dudley, you have to win this question to stay in the game.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Papal names taken by five or more Popes.

-Richard?

-We're simply looking for any Papal name taken by five or more Popes.

Good luck at home trying to get a few of these.

Lynne and Dudley, you go first this time.

I like the way Richard says "simply".

"We're simply looking for... Yeah, just Papal names taken by five or more Popes."

-Pope Pius.

-Pope Pius.

Sounds like a good answer to me. Say Lynne and Dudley, Pope Pius.

Cliff and Nick...

-They took our answer.

-I'm sorry.

It's either Pope John...

-I can't think of any other.

-Pope John.

-Pope John. OK, sounds good.

We have Pope Pius and we have Pope John.

Lynne and Dudley, Pius has to do this for you, otherwise we say goodbye to you.

Let's see if it's right and if it is, how many people said Pope Pius.

It's right.

It's a good answer. Down it comes.

Look at that! It's a pointless answer!

Very well done. That adds £250 to today's jackpot

and takes the total up to £3,000.

It scores you nothing. That's what Cliff and Nick have to equal.

They've gone for Pope John. Let's see if that's right and how many people said Pope John.

It's right.

52.

APPLAUSE

Very well done, Lynne and Dudley. That's a great answer. After two questions, you are one-all. Richard?

Brilliant answer. There's four pointless answers in all,

Pius obviously being one of them.

Very well done if you got one of those low scorers.

Thank you very much. Here is your third question.

Whoever wins this question will be going through to the final.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Police UK Top 40 singles as they could.

-Richard?

-We want any single released by The Police which reached the UK Top 40

prior to May 2011, please,

either released by The Police or had them as a named, featured artist.

Cliff and Nick, you go first again this time.

WHISPERING

I Do Do Da...

I Do Do Do.

LAUGHTER

I Do Do Da.

But which?

I Do Do Da.

-I Do Do Da is what you're saying?

-Yeah.

I Do Do Da is the answer you're giving. OK...

Lynne and Dudley?

-I think we should go for Don't Stand So Close To Me.

-Don't Stand So Close To Me.

Don't Stand So Close To Me. Very good indeed.

We have I Do Do Da from Cliff and Nick. Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said it.

Bad luck.

Lynne and Dudley, you've said Don't Stand So Close To Me.

Let's see how many people said that. All it has to be is right.

It's right. You're through to the final.

32...

is its score.

But it merely had to be right and it was.

After three questions, Lynne and Dudley are through to the final 2-1.

-Richard?

-Tough luck, guys. It's not I Do Do Da. It's De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da.

It's actually De Do Do Do (De Da Da Da).

-De Do Do Do would have done it?

-Yes.

He doesn't know his Morse Code!

Let's take a look at all the answers. There's a few pointless ones up here.

When The World Is Running Down and King Of Pain, both pointless,

Wrapped Around Your Finger, Spirits In The Material World, Can't Stand Losing You all scored 1.

Synchronicity II would have scored 2,

So Lonely, which sounds like they're singing about Sue Lawley, scored 2,

Invisible Sun, 4, there's De Do Do Do (De Da Da Da), 6,

Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic, 8,

Every Breath You Take, 16, Walking On The Moon, 18,

Roxanne, 30, Message In A Bottle, 31,

and Don't Stand So Close To Me, the highest answer with 32 points.

Amazing. Thanks very much, Richard.

At the end of the head-to-head, I'm afraid the losing pair is Cliff and Nick.

For now, we say goodbye, but thanks very much, Cliff and Nick. Great contestants.

But for Lynne and Dudley, it's now time for our Pointless final and the chance to win our jackpot of £3,000.

Congratulations, Lynne and Dudley.

You have fought off all the competition and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot and at the end of today's show, it stands at £3,000.

APPLAUSE

The rules are very simple. All you need to win that money is to find a pointless answer.

That's an answer that none of our 100 people could think of. We've had four pointless answers today.

Lynne, you gave us canary melon and you both gave us Pope Pius in the head-to-head.

All you have to do to win that money is find one more pointless answer.

First, choose a category and you can choose from these three options.

-20th Century Dramatists?

-No, I don't think so.

-World Politics?

-Possibly.

-And Pop Music, it depends what era it is.

-I'm too old.

-World Politics or Pop Music?

-We'll go for Pop Music.

-OK, Pop Music. Let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

-to name as many George Michael UK Top 40 singles as they could.

-I haven't got a clue.

-Richard?

-We're looking for any single released by George Michael or had him as a named, featured artist

that's reached the UK Top 40 prior to May 2011.

Any George Michael solo hit or has had him as a featured, named artist.

OK, you now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £3,000 is for just one answer to be pointless. Your 60 seconds start now.

Can I just clarify, Richard?

-Are we talking about George Michael on his own?

-George Michael on his own. No Wham singles.

-Dancing In The Street?

-Was it Dancing In The Street? I can't think of any others.

I don't know any George Michael. He's not somebody that I...

Dancing In The Street, George Michael, George Michael.

Dancing In The Street is definitely one with Elton John.

-I can't think.

-I can't think.

-I cannot think of two others.

-No.

We'll definitely go with Dancing In The Street.

-Sing it!

-No.

Um...

-Five seconds left.

-We've only got four seconds.

-We can only think of one.

We can only think of the one.

That's your time up. We were looking for George Michael UK Top 40 hits.

I now need just three answers from you.

Well, I think the only answer we feel is absolute

is George Michael singing Dancing In The Street. He featured with Elton John.

OK, we're going to need two other song titles from you.

We'll say, um...Let's Go.

-Let's Go.

-And Up In The Morning.

-Up In The Morning...

-LAUGHTER

-Of those three, which shall we put last?

-The best shot is Dancing In The Street with Elton John.

-We'll put that last.

-OK.

-Which is your least likely?

-Let's Go.

-So we'll have Let's Go, Up In The Morning, Dancing In The Street.

-Yes.

Let's put them up on the board in that order and here they are.

We were looking for George Michael UK Top 40 hits.

You said this was your least confident answer. You only need one pointless answer to win that £3,000.

Let's see if Let's Go is a right answer and if it is, let's see if it's a pointless answer.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

-I thought it would be.

-Let's Go not a pointless answer. You only have two more chances to win the jackpot.

What would you do with £3,000?

-Go to India to immunise the babies against polio.

-Very good indeed.

OK, well, let's hope these two answers will help you get there.

Let's see. Your next answer is Up In The Morning.

-This has to be right. It has to be a song.

-It's not.

And it has to be pointless. Up In The Morning, is it right, how many people said it?

Bad luck, bad luck.

You only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

-Everything is hanging on Dancing In The Street. You think this is a song he sang with Elton John.

-Yeah.

Let's find out. It has to be right and it has to be pointless if you're going to win that jackpot of £3,000.

Dancing In The Street, is it right, how many people said it?

Yeah, bad luck, bad luck.

-Oh, well...

-APPLAUSE

Faith - we could have had that.

Well, unfortunately, you didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer,

so you don't win today's jackpot of £3,000 which rolls over on to the next show,

-but you do get to take home our Pointless trophy.

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

Sorry, guys. You played so brilliantly and the wrong category came up for you there.

He did a song with Elton John. It was Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me. It would have scored you 4 points.

Dancing In The Street was a hit for David Bowie and Mick Jagger.

The big George Michael songs on the list - Careless Whisper, Freedom, Faith, Fastlove.

Let's take a look at some of the pointless ones, a few top ten hits amongst them.

Very well done if you got any of those at home and commiserations, guys. You played so well.

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

-Did you know any of those?

-No.

-Really?

-None of the pointless ones. We knew Faith.

-Yeah.

-That came after we'd given the answers.

Unfortunately, we have to say goodbye to you, Lynne and Dudley,

-but thank you so much for playing.

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

Nobody has won our jackpot, so it rolls over and on the next show, we will be playing for £4,000.

-Join us then to see if someone can win it. It's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me.

Subtitles by Subtext for Red Bee Media Ltd 2012

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