Episode 70 Pointless

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Thank you very much. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong.

Welcome to Pointless, the show where obvious answers mean nothing

and obscure answers mean everything.

Let's meet today's players.

We start by welcoming back Susie and Julie, who were on the show last time.

Everyone gets two chances to reach the final. This is your second and final chance.

Susie, remind us how you know each other.

We went to uni together. We were in the same class.

-Julie, what happened last time?

-It turns out that we know actors, but not where they were born.

-It was tough, though.

-Pretty tough.

What do you hope will come up today, Susie?

I like music, I like festivals.

'80s, a bit of '90s.

-Julie, how about you?

-Music as well, I think.

That's definitely our strong suit.

-This time, we've got to see a lot more of you. A lot more.

-That's the plan!

-Good plan.

Susie and Julie, best of luck. Now, Krish and David, welcome to you.

How do you two know each other?

-We're actually like very close friends.

-You're LIKE very close friends?

-Yeah, it's a bit iffy at the moment!

-What do you do, Krish?

I'm a student at the University of Oxford, studying law.

What do you want to do at the other end?

I want to sell my soul and become a commercial lawyer in the City.

-Brilliant.

-That's how to sell yourself to a crowd!

-Yes!

-Wow.

-David, what do you do?

-I've just finished my second year at Durham, studying French and Latin.

French and Latin? So you've got a year out in Ancient Rome?

-No, actually in Toulouse, but it should be really nice.

-That should be excellent.

-Very good.

-Nice weather.

-A warm welcome to the show, Krish and David.

Great to have you here. Next, we welcome back Sarah and Mary who were on the show last time.

-Two nurses from Cornwall.

-Yep.

Sarah, what happened last time?

I did very well. I got 200 points in the two rounds. We went out on the second round.

-Yes.

-And I got a word ending in R-E-NT that actually ended in L-E-N-T.

-Yes.

-It was Richard's fault!

-It always is!

-He didn't change our words. It was entirely Richard's fault.

I'm not disputing that, Mary!

I have to say, even though I'm being directly attacked,

I still prefer you to commercial lawyers!

Thank you!

You're not going to argue with a nurse!

Mary, what are you looking forward to coming up today?

Nothing, really!

I'm about absolutely useless at everything.

-Really?

-Yes.

-But useless and pointless are very similar.

-I did get a right one in the first one.

-Yes, you did.

-Yes.

-It'll be fine.

-If you ask me the same question, I'll be better this time!

-OK. You sing in a choir together. In various choirs.

-Two choirs.

-And you posed naked in a calendar.

-We did. Semi-naked.

-Semi-naked.

-It wasn't distasteful.

-OK.

That I completely believe, yes.

Sarah and Mary, lovely to have you back on the show. Best of luck.

Finally we welcome Ian and Louise. Ian how do you know each other?

Louise is my daughter.

-What do you do, Louise?

-I'm a conservation and design officer.

-Excellent. Ian, how about you?

-I'm a retired teacher.

-What did you teach?

-Geography.

-Geography.

If you had to teach anything, I'd say geography, history and English,

they're the three that vie, but geography is very easily applicable to Pointless.

I thought you meant if you were a teacher, that's what you'd like to teach.

-No, I'd be rubbish.

-Yeah, you'd be terrible.

-What would you teach if you were a teacher?

-I could teach swimming. I used to have a whistle.

And say, "Oi! Oi!" Pretty much all that the guys that taught me swimming did.

That's terrific.

Ian, what are you hoping is going to come up?

'60s, '70s music, films, maybe.

Anything from the '60s and '70s, my era.

OK. What, you just switched off after the '70s? What was it?

-Yes.

-Too busy teaching relief rainfall in Equatorial...

-Something like that, yeah!

Very good. Louise, what are you looking forward to coming up?

I'd quite like films. Anything from the '30s and '40s.

Hollywood, the golden era of Hollywood.

I'm hoping somebody's going to take care of whatever happened after 1979 in your partnership!

It's great to have you on the show, Ian and Louise.

Best of luck. We'll find out more about all of you throughout the show.

There's one person left to introduce.

His knowledge is like an illness, and there's no cure for obscure.

-It's my Pointless friend, Richard.

-Hiya!

-Sounds good, that!

Hello!

-Good afternoon.

-Good afternoon.

-How are you today?

-I'm very well, thank you.

-Excellent.

We've got two returning pairs today, but we didn't see much of either pair last time.

Susie and Julie, we lost almost in a heartbeat, didn't we?

And Sarah and Mary stayed around for a bit longer

but it didn't go brilliantly for them in Round Two.

So it could be quite an open field today, I think.

Rounds One and Two are both fiction of very different types.

If you get through both rounds, you've done very well.

They'll test very different ends of the fiction curve.

Thanks. All our questions have been put to 100 people before the show.

To get to the final and be in with a chance of winning our jackpot,

our contestants need to find the obscure answers those 100 people didn't get.

So the fewer of our 100 people who knew the answer, the fewer points you'll score.

Everyone's trying to find a pointless answer, one that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we'll add £250 to the jackpot.

Ben and Rob didn't win the jackpot last time,

so we add another £1,000 to that. So today's jackpot starts off at £2,000.

If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless!

In this first round, each of you must give me one answer, and you cannot confer.

The pair with the highest score at the end of the round will be eliminated.

Try and make sure that's not you.

Our first category today is...

TV. Can you decide in your pairs who's going first and who second.

Whoever's first, please step up to the podium.

OK. And the question concerns...

Fictional spouses. Richard?

In a moment, Alexander will show you a list of six famous TV characters,

all of whom got married more than once.

We need you to tell us the first name of anyone any of these six people got married to.

Any of the spouses of the six people you're about to see.

Very best of luck.

Susie and Julie, you all drew lots before the show and today you're going to go first.

OK. The six TV characters are...

I'll read those all one last time.

Just name any person who's been married to one of those characters.

Susie.

Um, I know a few of them, I think.

-Deirdre.

-Deirdre.

Deirdre, says Susie.

Is it right? If so, how many people said Deirdre.

It's right.

That's a big old score to start us off with.

Ken Barlow's third wife, Deirdre.

David.

Um, yeah, I'm really not too sure about any of them.

But I think I'll go for Ross Geller

and he married, I think, the Englishwoman, Emily.

Emily, says David. Emily.

Is it right, and if so, how many people said Emily.

It's right.

Very well done, David. 13.

Good answer.

Yes, a very good answer. Played by Helen Baxendale.

Ross's second wife.

They had those episodes over in London, didn't they?

The Duchess of York and Richard Branson and everyone turned up.

-A lot of fun.

-Yeah, a lot of fun.

-A lot of fun.

-Thanks, Richard.

Now, then. Sarah.

We're after the first name of any character who's been married to one of these TV characters.

Laura. Ian Beale married Laura.

Laura, says Sarah. Is Laura right and how many people said it.

Very well done indeed, Sarah.

Lowest score so far. Six for Laura.

Well done, Sarah. Ian Beale's third wife. She came into his household as a nanny.

Now, then, Ian.

I think I can give two or three answers

but I'm going to try Blake Carrington from Dynasty.

Blake, says Ian. Blake. Let's see if Blake's right and if so, how many people said Blake.

It's right.

19 for Blake. Good score.

Well played, Ian. Alexis Carrington's first husband played by John Forsythe.

The only person to appear in every single episode of Dynasty.

-Of which there were how many?

-220.

-Wow.

-It's a lot, but we've done 400 of these, so...

Yeah, I know, but the storylines on these are pretty tame

-compared to that.

-Do you think?

You wait till Round Two, mate!

-Again?

-I've got something pretty special lined up.

We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at the scores.

Sarah, a lovely low score there.

Sarah and Mary looking very strong indeed on the back of that score of six.

Up to 13, where we find David and Krish.

Then up to 19 where we find Ian and Louise.

Then Susie and Julie. 65!

Julie, you know what you have to do.

Best of luck. Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK. We are looking for TV characters who've been married to any of these characters.

Louise, you're on 19. The high scorers on 65 are Julie and Susie.

So a score of 45 or less sees you through to the next round. What do you think?

There's a few that I'm unsure of.

There's one that I was hoping nobody else would say.

And that's Lilith from Frasier.

-Lilith.

-From Frasier, yes.

-Lilith, says Louise.

Here is your red line. If you get below that, you'll avoid being the new high scorers.

How many people said Lilith? Is it right?

You've done it! Very well done.

It continues to go down. Five!

Best score so far, Louise.

Takes your total to 24. Very well done indeed.

Terrific answer, Louise. Well done. She played his psychiatrist.

Excellent. Now, Mary. How well did Sarah do in that first pass?

She did well, but I don't watch soaps.

-They're not all soaps.

-Aren't they?

Most of them are.

Well, I should think if Ian Beale's been married loads, perhaps he married somebody called Janet.

So I'll go with Janet.

Mary. Mary, are you still a nurse?

-No, only on occasions.

-It's a worry, isn't it?

-No, I think it's fun.

-It is fun, yes.

-I still chase her round the bed!

-I bet you do. I bet you do.

There's your red line, Mary. If you get below that red line with Janet,

somebody's smiling on you!

Is Janet right? If it is, let's see how many people said Janet.

It's right!

Very well done. You're through to the next round, Mary.

And it scores one!

It takes your total up to seven.

I love these boarded rounds, Richard!

Very well played, Mary. Terrific.

Remind us again who Janet was married to?

God knows!

She was actually the second wife of Ken Barlow.

-Oh, yeah!

-There we are. Very well done, Mary. That's fantastic!

Krish, you're on 13. The high scorers are still Julie and Susie on 65.

If you can score 51 or less, through you go.

How are you feeling about this board?

Well, I'm a massive fan of Friends.

My mind has gone completely blank over one of them, which I think would be a good answer.

I'll have to go with a reasonably safe answer and it's Rachel who married Ross in Las Vegas.

Rachel, says Krish. There's your red line.

If you get below that, you're in Round Two.

Rachel. Is it right? How many people said it?

Absolutely right.

You've done it.

Well done, Krish. Takes your total up to 43.

Well played, Krish. Safe and sound. Ross's third wife.

They married whilst drunk in Vegas.

Julie.

-I have bad news.

-Yep.

You are the high scorers even before you've given your doubtless brilliant answer.

The 65 was just too high.

However, maybe you've got a pointless answer, and you could leave a legacy for those left.

Maybe.

I've never seen Dynasty. Not a clue.

I remember Frasier getting married, but I was hoping no-one said Lilith.

I remember Ian married Cindy.

On the basis that we're going out,

following Mary I might just give a random guess.

So I am going to say Sarah.

Sarah. Let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many people said Sarah?

Worth a shot.

There we are. An incorrect answer scores 100 points, taking your total to 165. Richard?

You see the difference there between a brilliant answer and a disappointing one.

But well done for trying to get £250 on the jackpot. That's nice.

There's three pointless answers here. Only three.

Let's take a look at them.

Nanette was Frasier's first wife.

Sean, who was married to Alexis Carrington

and Terri, who was Paul Robinson from Neighbours wife.

Other low scorers. The lowest scorer for Ken Barlow was Janet.

So it was a very good answer.

The lowest answer for Ross Geller would have been Carol, six points.

And the lowest answer for Ian Beale was Laura.

So another very good answer.

Thanks, Richard. At the end of the first round, the pair leaving us with a score of 165

is Julie and Susie, one of our returning pairs.

-Again first round, I'm sorry to say.

-Yep.

I'm so sorry. We're saying goodbye to you far too soon.

It's been great having you on the show. Thanks for playing, Julie and Susie.

But for the remaining pairs, it's time for Round Two.

At the end of this round, we'll be saying goodbye to another couple.

You have to keep those scores low like Sarah and Mary did that round.

What about Janet?

I could say that I'm brilliant and knew it.

But I'd be a liar.

And I have a niece called Janet, so it seemed a good name to chuck in.

You should share the jackpot with her if you win it.

-Yeah.

-No.

-No.

-I like her family, but not that much!

-I told you she was bossy, didn't I?

-OK.

-She's keeping the trophy and I'll have the money.

-She'll have both trophies?

-I'm not greedy. I don't mind.

You get one trophy each.

I'll have the trophy and the money as well, then!

So you're not greedy, but you'll have the trophy and the money as well.

MOUTHS

-OK.

-Best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for Round Two is...

-There we are.

-That's the other end of that curve.

-Yeah.

Can you decide in your pairs who's going first and who's going second.

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. The question concerns...

Dickens characters and their novels. Richard?

On each pass, we'll give you the names of six characters created by Charles Dickens.

You just need to tell us which novel or novella they appeared in.

A nice obscure answer will score fewer points.

An incorrect answer will score 100 points.

There are 12 in all to have a go at at home. Best of luck.

We are looking for the novels or novellas in which these Dickens characters appeared.

We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Six Dickens characters.

We need to know the novel or novella they came from. Krish?

I've never read a single Dickens novel, unfortunately.

I don't really read for fun, so this doesn't bode well for me at all.

Um, I'm going to go for...

Miss Havisham, Bleak House.

Bleak House says Krish for Miss Havisham. Is it right,

and if it is, how many people said Bleak House.

Bad luck, I'm afraid, Krish.

That's an incorrect answer which scores a maximum 100 points. Sorry.

Sorry, Krish, but on the upside,

if you don't read for fun, you're going to be a brilliant corporate lawyer!

I'll give the correct answer at the end of the pass.

-Mary?

-Do I go safe or do I not?

I'll go for Bill Sikes in Oliver Twist.

Oliver Twist, says Mary, for Bill Sikes.

Is it right? How many people said Oliver Twist.

It's right.

40 for Oliver Twist.

Absolutely right. Bill Sikes, the horrible villainous house-breaker murderer.

All sorts of terrible things.

Louise. The novels or novellas these Dickens characters appeared in.

You're the last person to have this board, so talk us through and fill in any blanks.

The one that I'm really confident on is Miss Havisham,

cos I've just finished reading Great Expectations.

But I think that might be quite high.

The ghost of Jacob Marley I think is A Christmas Carol.

And then I've got an inkling that Mr Micawber is David Copperfield.

I know there's a film of David Copperfield and WC Fields is in it.

I think he plays Mr Micawber.

So it's a bit of a guess.

But I'll go for David Copperfield.

David Copperfield you're saying for Mr Micawber.

Let's see if it's right, and how many people said it if it is.

It's right. Very well done, Louise.

Five!

There's your reward. Brilliant score, Louise.

Great answer. Five for David Copperfield.

Well played, Louise. A terrific answer. You're absolutely right,

played by WC Fields in a film from the mid-'30s.

Let's go through the rest of the board. I bet you're good at this.

Louise has already given us a couple of them.

Miss Havisham, right, it was Great Expectations.

And right again, it would have scored more. It scored 35.

And the ghost of Jacob Marley is from A Christmas Carol.

That scored 38.

Little Nell?

-The Old Curiosity Shop.

-Absolutely. That scored nine.

James Carker is the best answer on that board.

James Carker is a pointless answer.

-I don't know.

-Well done to anyone at home who said Dombey and Son.

-Ah.

-Dombey and Son, pointless answer.

We're halfway through the round.

Let's look at the scores. Louise, well done. Five, a cracking score.

Louise and Ian looking very strong.

Up to 40 where we find Mary and Sarah.

And then up to 100 where Krish and David are to be found.

David, it's going to require a miracle and also a very low score from you in the next pass.

-I'm hoping I can dig us out of this hole...

-OK.

-..that Krish has landed us in!

-Best of luck with that, David.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

We'll put six more Dickens characters on the board. Here they are.

I'll read those one last time.

We are looking for the Dickens novels or novellas

in which these characters appeared.

Ian, you want the one that the fewest of our 100 people knew.

There's only two I'm pretty sure of.

I'm going to go for Sydney Carton

who, I think, was the hero of A Tale of Two Cities.

Sydney Carton, A Tale of Two Cities. Here's your red line.

If you get below that, you're in the head-to-head.

A Tale of Two Cities. Is it right? How many people said it?

Absolutely right and you're through.

A great score, Ian, and a fabulous total of 13.

Very well done.

Very well played, Ian. They're pretty good on that last podium!

Good scoring. He's the drunk who redeems himself by taking someone else's place at the guillotine.

-He's the man who says...

-Far, far better.

-'Tis a far, far better thing than I have ever done.

-Indeed.

-Sarah?

-Yeah.

-You're on 40. High scorers, David and Krish on 100.

If you can score 59, you're through.

There's one that I know for definite, and one that I think I know.

With my track record, I should go for the definite.

But I'm going to go for the bottom one. Pip, I think he's Great Expectations as well.

Let's see. Great Expectations. How many people said it.

Absolutely right.

Through you go. Very well done.

73. Our two nurses go through to the head-to-head.

Yes, the novel's narrator and hero, Pip.

Very good answer.

Now, then, David. I have grave news.

-Yeah.

-We'll be saying goodbye to you at the end of this round.

Even before you give your answer. Can you talk us through the board?

The only one I know for definite that's left

is Ebenezer Scrooge and A Christmas Carol.

Apart from that, I really have no idea.

It's going to annoy my dad, cos he's read loads of Dickens.

So, funnily enough,

one of the characters he goes on about

is this lawyer who's really, really horrible.

So I'm going to guess Thomas Gradgrind, Bleak House.

Thomas Gradgrind, Bleak House, says David.

Taking a punt. Is that right, and if so, how many people said Bleak House?

Bad luck.

Bad luck, David. An incorrect answer.

It scores 100 points and takes your total up to 200. Richard?

The name of the lawyer you're thinking of in Bleak House is Tulkinghorn.

Maybe who your dad means. And Thomas Gradgrind is a northern industrialist in Hard Times.

Thinks children should only be taught facts. Three points.

John Jarndyce is from?

-Bleak House.

-Bleak House.

-Absolutely right. Four points.

Ebenezer Scrooge, right, was A Christmas Carol, but would have been a big scorer.

No point in going for it.

And Sarah Gamp is a pointless answer.

Very well done if you said - name a Dickens book.

-Little Dorrit.

-Martin Chuzzlewit.

Martin Chuzzlewit. Pointless answer. Well done if you got that.

Thanks very much, Richard. At the end of our second round, the losing pair with the highest score

is David and Krish, our newest members of the 200 club.

That wasn't a great round for you, that.

-No.

-Not really at all!

-Yeah.

-We look forward to seeing you again next time, David and Krish.

Meantime, thanks very much for playing, David and Krish.

But things are about to get even more exciting as we enter the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Ian and Louise, Sarah and Mary.

You are only one round away from the final

and the chance to play for our jackpot which currently stands at £2,000.

You're now going head-to-head and the first pair to win two questions

will be playing for the jackpot.

But you are now allowed to confer.

So, Sarah and Mary, it was Round Two last time. Here you are.

Into virgin territory. Oh, the head-to-head.

And Ian and Louise, you've played fantastically.

Very strong, solid play.

Lovely low scoring all the way through.

-How are you feeling?

-We had some good topics earlier.

Gracious of you to say that. Very best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

OK. Here comes your first question. And it concerns...

Country Outlines. Richard?

We're about to show you five pictures of outlines of countries

-along with... I've just realised Ian's a geography teacher!

-So did I!

We're about to show you the outlines of five countries with some of their major islands as well.

Can you identify the most obscure of these five, please.

OK. Thanks, Richard. Let's reveal our five countries. Here they come.

There we are. Five countries.

Ian and Louise, you've played best throughout the show so far,

so you go first.

We think D is the Republic of South Africa.

You think D is the Republic of South Africa.

Sarah and Mary.

Talk us through the board.

Mary thinks A is Japan.

I thought B was Germany, but no, it could be France.

C is definitely Italy.

And E, I haven't got a clue.

I thought that was Brazil, actually.

But we're going to go for C because we know it's right.

You're going to say C, Italy.

So...

We have D, South Africa, and C, Italy.

Ian and Louise said D was South Africa.

Is it right, and if it is, how many of our 100 said it.

It's right.

Very well done indeed. Seven!

Very good indeed, Ian.

Sarah and Mary have said C, Italy. C, Italy.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said Italy for C.

Absolutely right.

-84.

-We were right!

You were right.

But Ian and Louise were "righter"!

Ian and Louise, after one question, you're up one-nil. Well done.

A proper Geography teacher's answer, the Republic of South Africa. Well played, you two.

Any ideas on A, Ian and Louise?

-Chile.

-It is Chile, absolutely right.

It's got a 5,000-kilometre border with Argentina.

23 points that would have scored.

B is France. The ladies were right.

But that would have scored 43.

Surprisingly low.

And E, it's not Brazil, it's India.

That would have scored 38 points.

The big gap in the middle of South Africa is the kingdom of Lesotho,

which is entirely surrounded.

Thank you, Richard. Let's find out what the second question concerns.

Here it comes.

Filmed versions of Stephen King works. Richard?

You're about to see the names of five actors who've appeared in at least one Stephen King adaptation.

We'll put a year next to their name.

Can you tell us the Stephen King adaptation that actor starred in in that year. Best of luck.

OK. Let's reveal our five actors in Stephen King adaptations.

Here they are. We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

There we are. Sarah and Mary, you go first this time.

I think Tim Robbins is The Shawshank Redemption.

Tim Robbins, The Shawshank Redemption, say Sarah and Mary.

Ian and Louise, the board is yours.

I think Louise knows them all.

I don't know the John Travolta one.

I might kick myself when I hear it.

I think Jack Nicholson's The Shining.

River Phoenix, I think, is Stand By Me.

And Kathy Bates is Misery.

Shall we go for Misery, cos I'm not 100%.

We'll go for Misery, Kathy Bates.

You say Kathy Bates, Misery.

So we have The Shawshank Redemption playing Misery.

Sarah and Mary, you said The Shawshank Redemption.

Is it right, and if it is, how many of our 100 said it.

It's right.

19. Good answer.

Ian and Louise have said Kathy Bates, Misery.

Let's see if it's right, and if so, how many people said that.

-It's the one where she saws his leg off.

-I wasn't expecting that at all.

That side-swiped me. Sarah and Mary, very well done to you.

You've won the point. You're back in the game. One-all after two questions.

Yes, that's a sneaky one. She was in Misery, and won an Oscar for it. But it was in 1990.

And the film she was in in 1995 was a pointless answer.

It was Dolores Claiborne. Absolutely right.

She plays the title role there. A pointless answer. Tough luck.

It's especially tough because you were right about River Phoenix.

He was in Stand By Me and would have seen you to the jackpot round. It would have scored ten points.

Jack Nicholson is the biggest scorer. The Shining, of course.

That scored 43 points.

And a young John Travolta was in Carrie.

That would have scored seven points.

Some good films there.

Very good. Thanks, Richard.

So it comes down to a third question. A decider.

Whoever wins this goes through to the final to play for the jackpot. Best of luck to both pairs.

Our third question concerns...

ABBA singles.

Richard?

We'll show you the names of five ABBA singles now.

They're all in anagram form.

Can you unscramble them and pick the most obscure.

Whoever gets this point is into the jackpot round. Best of luck.

OK. Thanks very much.

Let's reveal our five ABBA singles in anagram form. Here they come. We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

Ian and Louise, you get to go first again this time.

I think...

I think we'll go for Winner Takes It All.

Link A Stealthier Newt.

Link A Stealthier Newt - Winner Takes It All, say Ian and Louise.

-Sarah and Mary.

-We were going to say that one.

Over to you. The board's yours. Talk us through the board.

-Have you worked them all out?

-The first one is Waterloo.

I haven't got a clue about the third or the fourth,

but the second one's Fernando.

You're going to say Fernando.

So Winner Takes It All plays Fernando.

Ian and Louise say The Winner Takes It All.

Is that right, and if so, how many of our 100 people said The Winner Takes It All.

It's right.

It's very right.

Ten! Brilliant!

Ten for The Winner Takes It All.

Now, then. Sarah and Mary, you have gone for Fernando.

Ten is what you have to beat. How many people said Fernando? Is it right?

Absolutely right.

-Oh!

-41.

41. Which means, Ian and Louise,

after three questions you are through to the final two-one.

-Very well done indeed. Richard?

-The Winner Takes It All, indeed.

There was only one answer that would have beaten that, so well played.

Let's take a look. Wear Loot, that's Waterloo.

Truer Purpose. Have you got that?

No.

-You'll kick yourself.

-Super Trouper.

-Absolutely right.

It's annoying when they come up.

Now, Loyally Revalue Moon is a pointless answer.

A pointless answer. An ABBA hit.

Any ideas, anyone?

Any ideas in the audience?

-MAN:

-Lay All Your Love On Me.

Lay All Your Love On Me. Absolutely right.

It is indeed. Look at that.

Brilliant.

Very well done. So, our losing pair at the end of the head-to-head,

it's the end of the line for Sarah and Mary. It's been wonderful having you on the show.

Huge entertainment value. You've done so well.

Right through to the head-to-head, this round.

Thanks so much for playing. It's been lovely having you on the show. Sarah and Mary.

But for Ian and Louise, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Ian and Louise. You've seen off all the competition

and won our coveted Pointless trophy!

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £2,000.

You've done so well. Your first appearance on Pointless.

You've sailed through to the final.

-A real team effort there, as well.

-We're a good team.

Very good. The rules are simple. To win the money, all you have to do is find a pointless answer.

We haven't had any pointless answers on the show today. Find one now and you'll leave with that money.

First, you have to choose a category. You have a choice of five options. They are...

There's only one I feel comfortable with.

And that's Countries and Capitals!

Maybe Tennis Stars.

-But certainly not...

-Irish Playwrights, I could only name two or three.

I'd struggle after that.

-I won't be good with Space.

-Space, no.

Tennis Stars I could have a guess. Countries and Capitals.

Countries and Capitals it is.

Let's find out what the question is. We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

..as they could. Richard?

This is one to think about. We want the name of any country whose usual English name

starts with the same letter as the name of its capital.

We'll take the short form, so leave out the word "the" that appears in the name of some countries.

So any country that begins with the same letter as its capital, please.

As always, by a country we mean a sovereign state which is a member of the UN in its own right.

Very best of luck.

Thanks very much, Richard. You now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £2,000 is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

OK. Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

Three really obvious ones. Mexico, Luxembourg, Brazil.

-Taipei, Taiwan.

-Oh, that's a good one.

Baghdad.

Italy...

-I'll try and do South America.

-OK.

-Argentina, Buenos Aires.

-Lima, no.

-Chile, Santiago.

-Bogota.

No.

Asuncion, no.

Mexico. Oh, you said Mexico City.

Asia. Japan, obviously not, no.

India. Jakarta. No.

Pakistan, Islamabad, Bangladesh, Dacca.

Singapore. Is that a country?

Singapore City? Is that a city, Singapore City?

What's Malaysia? Kuala Lumpur.

Oh, yeah.

Ten seconds left.

China, no.

Moscow. Soviet Union.

South Africa...

OK. Your time is up.

We wanted countries whose capital cities begin with the same letter.

-I now need three answers from you.

-Taiwan.

-Taiwan.

-I would go Luxembourg.

-Yep.

Yep. And then Mexico.

-What's the other one?

-Or Brazil? I don't know.

Brazil. That's better. Brazil. Yes.

So Taiwan, Luxembourg and Brazil.

Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-It's got to be Taiwan.

-Yes.

-Taiwan. We'll put that last.

-And your least likely, Brazil I'm guessing.

-Yes.

-Yes.

Let's put those on the board in that order. Here they are.

Countries whose capital cities begin with the same letter as the country.

Brazil you thought was probably your least likely to be pointless.

You only have to find one pointless answer to win that jackpot of £2,000. Let's see.

Brazil. How many of our 100 people said that?

It's right.

It's right. Let's see how far down the column this is going to take you.

If Brazil takes you to zero, you can leave immediately with £2,000...

14.

Brazil.

Ian, what would you do with £2,000?

Buy a very posh atlas, I think!

Louise?

A nice holiday.

Very good. It's a good place to go.

Luxembourg is especially good.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer, Luxembourg.

It has to be right, it has to be pointless to win that jackpot of £2,000.

Let's see how many people said Luxembourg.

It's right. Brazil took us down to 14.

Luxembourg is taking us down through the thirties, into the twenties,

into the teens. If this goes down to zero, you leave here...

Ooh!

You've halved the score.

We're down to seven.

Only one more chance to win today's jackpot.

Everything is now riding on Taiwan. We're looking for countries whose capital begins with the same letter.

Your third and final answer, the one you thought was your best shot at a pointless answer. Taiwan.

To win the jackpot of £2,000, this has to be pointless. Let's find out.

Taiwan. Is it pointless? Good luck.

Ah. Unfortunately, you didn't manage to find that all-important answer.

But you do still get to take home a Pointless trophy.

So very well done for that.

Yes. Sorry about that. Singapore which you mentioned would have been a good answer. That scored three.

Luxembourg. There's another couple of small European countries you could have gone for

that would have been pointless.

If you'd gone for Andorra, Andorra La Vella,

or San Marino, San Marino the capital. Both were pointless.

Let's see some more pointless answers, though.

The first one is Andorra.

Barbados, Bridgetown the capital there.

Bujumbura is the capital of Burundi.

Djibouti, the capital is Djibouti.

Georgetown, Guyana.

Male, in the Maldives.

Mozambique, the capital Maputo.

Niger, the capital Niamey.

There's San Marino. Another couple you could have had - Brunei, The Marshall Islands,

Papua New Guinea, which is Port Moresby.

Sao Tome and Principe and Vanuatu.

Some people say Vila is the capital. Port Vila or Vila.

All of those pointless answers. Very well done if you said any of those at home. Very impressive.

Unfortunately, we do have to say goodbye to you, Ian and Louise.

It's been brilliant having you on the show. Thank you both so much for playing. Brilliant.

Well, Ian and Louise didn't win our jackpot today,

so it rolls over to the next show where we'll be playing for £3,000.

-Join us next time to see if someone can win it. Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye!