Top Ten Shockers Snog Marry Avoid?

Welcome to the best of Snog, Marry, Avoid?

You, my friends, are in for a treat tonight,

as Pod and I take you through our top ten most memorable makeunders of all time.

These are the boys and girls whose transformations have been the most remarkable and downright shocking.

They are the top worst fake offenders to ever come before Pod,

but has your favourite made it? You'll have to wait and see. Either way,

I can promise you tons of tan, mountains of slap and enough flesh to make a blind man blush.

it's the Top Ten of Pod's most willing victims, and I can't podding wait!

Tonight we celebrate the miracle of the makeunder.

-FANFARE PLAYS

-Hello, Pod, what a lovely welcome!

You're looking gorgeous this evening, and I'm loving the red carpet.

Why thank you, The Frost. You're looking particularly stunning on this momentous occasion.

If I didn't know better, I'd think you were a little excited!

Excited? I can't wait to relive my top ten triumphs in the war against fakery.

-Don't you mean OUR top ten triumphs? I did help a little bit!

-Couldn't have done it without you, Frost!

Now, let's get on with it. FANFARE PLAYS

Coming up on tonight's show, we count down from ten to one

of Pod's toughest challenges and her greatest victories.

These are the top ten most surprising,

most shocking and most unforgettable makeunders of all time.

So, Pod, are you ready to reveal who made the number ten slot in our favourite ever makeunders?

Yes, I am, and if I recall correctly, this slap addict

was in serious need of some natural beauty rehab.

Hi, I'm Chantelle, and I'm living the dream!

My life's changed so much, from being literally, like, down here to up there.

Chantelle Houghton! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Fake tan, the hair extensions, the nails, the make-up, the...

You know, all that sort of thing, that's what screams "Me".

It's not the type of dress that you'd wear to, like,

your new boyfriend's mum and dad's dinner party!

# What you know about me? What you What you know about me...? #

I've had breast implants, and I've had fillers in my face,

just to fill my face out a bit.

I couldn't live without my hair extensions.

# Cos if I don't... #

Long live hair extensions!

I'm an ambassador for fake tan!

-Does that mean I love it? Oh...!

-SHE LAUGHS

I'm doing my make-up, then I'll be happy with it, then I'll put my clothes on...

and then I'll put more make-up on.

Whilst I'm waiting for my cab, I'll put some more make-up on...

-SHE LAUGHS

-..then whilst I'm in the cab, on the way to wherever I am,

I'll put more make-up on, and then, whenever I'm out,

I just put more make-up on!

# Something kinda ooh Jumping on my toot, toot

# Something 'side of me Wants a part of you, ooh-ooh... #

Well, on a night out, usually I just start off with an alcopop,

-and then maybe have a few glasses of champagne, and a few shots...

-SHE GIGGLES

And then it's...bed!

# ..Wants a part of you, ooh-ooh... #

I am Pod. Who are you?

I'm Chantelle.

Sorry, Jordan? SHE LAUGHS

-No, Chantelle.

-Oh, Chantelle! Sorry, the massive fake oranges were confusing me!

-Chantelle...

-Yes.

-Pod needs to talk about the skin on your massive oranges.

-OK, let's talk about it.

-Did the man from Del Monte say yes?

You see I disagree. I don't think I'm orange, I think I'm golden.

Like 24 "carrots"(?)

-You're funny(!)

-Pod wants to know why you're covered in all that slap.

Cos I like it. I'm addicted.

Good job you've enrolled in Pod's rehab programme for slap addicts.

Pod can cure you of your addiction to fakery.

But I know what's underneath the fakery, and I don't like it.

-Pod knows there is a stunning natural beauty underneath.

-Aw, thank you.

Run Phase One: Public Analysis.

-Go on, then.

-I asked people who didn't know who you were,

"would she steal your heart, steal your razor,

"or steal your wallet?"

Oh, my god!

-Wallet! But obviously I never would!

-Play.

Steal my wallet, I reckon.

She looks like she'd steal my wallet.

She'd steal my wallet, I reckon.

Just wake up, and... Poof! It's gone!

85% of the public

thought you would steal their wallet.

-Shut up!

-Yes.

-Really?

-Yes!

-My god!

The time has come for you, Chantelle the slap addict, to go to rehab...

# No, no, no...! #

where you will begin your recovery by removing all your make-up.

-SHE GROANS

-OK.

Run Phase Two: Deep Cleanse.

-Please put on your Deep Cleanse uniform.

-Oh, my god,

I can't believe I'm doing this. I actually can't believe it.

Believe it, Chantelle. The slap is coming off.

Oh, god! I hate it!

The time has come, Chantelle, to free the natural beauty within.

This is not funny at all.

Pod is not amused. Show me that wipe.

SHE GIGGLES

Hm, I SUPPOSE that will do.

Pod will take care of the rest.

Run Phase Three: The Makeunder.

-Oh, my god!

-SHE LAUGHS

No way! Oh, my god!

Before, people thought you would steal their wallets.

Cheeky gits! I'd never steal anything!

Now, a massive

90% of the public

said you would steal their hearts.

-Shut up! Really?

-Really.

Aah, that's nice!

I don't really look like an Essex Girl any more, do I?

-Natural beauty has been restored. Goodbye.

-Bye!

Oh, Chantelle looks stunning, Pod, but as we've learnt over the years, she's not the only one

-who's had trouble removing the slap.

-Correct, Frost.

Nothing strikes fear into the hearts of slap addicts everywhere

like these three little words - "REMOVE YOUR MAKE-UP!"

SHE SCREAMS

-Please put on your Deep Cleanse uniform.

-Oh, I'm scared!

-This is not fashionable.

-What is that?!

I'm not putting that stupid hat on my head!

-SHE WHIMPERS

-I look like a proper nan!

I don't feel very glamorous at all right now.

Now, remove your make-up.

No! You can't do that to me!

No, I'm not doing that!

No...!

Ooh...! No!

-No!

-SHE SOBS

SHE SQUEALS

Give me those lashes.

I love my lashes...!

Show me the state of that pad.

# I can see clearly Now the rain has gone

-# It's gonna be a bright

-Bright

-# Bright,

-bright

-Sun-shining day... #

You already look much younger and fresher without all that slap.

Oh, shut up!

Oh, Pod, do you ever feel a smidgeon of sympathy for these girls when they remove their slap?

Really, Frost, do you know me at all?

It serves them right, the make-up-mad fools!

Now, who's next in our countdown?

You'd best take cover, it's a tangerine tornado,

Hannah Hillman.

We're women, we should be showing things off.

# Are you ready?... #

This dress is one of my favourites. It's ultra skimpy

and it's sparkley. What more could a man want?

# Pop the champagne Livin' the life... #

On a night out to London...

I don't think you need any underwear.

# Glamorous Ooh, flouncy, flouncy... #

Right, I've got everyone helping me into this corset.

-Ow!

-A complete, absolute head-turner.

I think she looks amazing.

We want it as tight as you can get this corset.

She's got the beauty within and that's the main thing, I think.

More, more...

She obviously wants to make an impression

and I think she'll do that.

We are getting there, girls. Go more.

Little bit... Little bit risque.

Party! Woo!

You walk into a club and you get noticed, then you've done your job.

# Don't cha?

# Don't cha?... #

This is me, hair, make-up, this is Storm.

# ..Raw like me... #

When your outfits on, your make-ups on, your fake tans on,

you're ready to go, you feel like 100 dollars.

And I always feel like 100 dollars.

I am Pod. The Personal Overhaul Device.

Who are you?

Hello, Pod. I'm Hannah Louise Hillman.

Or my friends call me either Storm or Montana.

What do you want to do in life?

If I could do anything in the world, I would be Jordan.

-Why?

-Cos I love her.

And I think that she's just done so well in her life.

Jordan is famous for two very big reasons.

What would you like to be famous for?

I'd love to be a TV presenter. I'd love that.

With a name like Storm, perhaps you could be a weather girl.

-Do you think I could become a weather girl?

-You've got the name,

-shall we see if you've got the knack?

-Yeah!

Here's Hannah Montana with today's weather report.

It could get stormy.

Hello, viewers at home.

As you can see, the weather is still not looking good.

As we draw in to the night time, we're going to, unfortunately,

get some very high winds and rain.

Please be careful on the roads

and I hope you enjoy your weekend

and I hope the weather is better next week.

-Was it good?

-Hmm, very informative.

-Do you think you'll make it big?

-I never thought about it before,

but now I actually think I might be able to.

Not dressed like that. Your warm front would distract the viewers.

-LAUGHS

-That's just tough, cos I'm not putting it away!

Cheeky!

You are a make-up mad minx in too too little clothes

and will undergo my...

You cheeky monkey.

Run Phase Three: The Makeunder.

Oh...I love it!

-Oh, my God.

-Pod thinks you look very beautiful. do you agree?

Yeah, I love it.

Pod computes the makeunder has been a complete success.

-Goodbye.

-Bye.

Hannah looked beautiful when you finished with her, Pod,

but I think the weather would be improved if it was

presented by somebody wearing a tiara and a tutu.

I think this countdown would be improved if you shut up and told us who's next.

You are a cruel, cruel computer, as the nudey-rudey at number 8 is about to find out.

I love the naked body so why not go out half-naked?

Most people can't so if you can, then you might as well just flaunt it!

The more naked, the more better!

There's been so many times that I've turned up at the house

and it's unbelievable,

it's unreal when you think to yourself, "I can't handle this"!

I love my blue outfit, it's my favourite.

Well, these were like old tights and this was a bra that I just attached feathers to.

This is the chain outfit and it's not really an outfit, it's jewellery to be honest with you...

there's nothing to it, really!

I love it!

I don't know what she's doing in the bathroom...

I don't know what she's doing in that bedroom...

And I'm thinking goodness gracious me, perhaps she's lost the plot a bit!

I'm ready to go. I'm gonna scare all those men!

She's the girl that everyone has their eyes on.

She'll be like I'll wear this, even if it's showing my naked body.

I feel so sexy and happy and I can walk round naked.

I'm a wild child!

I just want her to realise that she's beautiful without all that crap.

-What the hell!

-I am Pod.

-Hi, Pod!

-Who are you?

-I'm Mickayla.

What are you wearing?

I'm wearing underwear with feathers stuck to it.

-Did you kill many blue chickens for that bikini?

-Yeah, I did, actually!

-Don't you like clothes?

-Not really.

Aside from the need to get dressed, why have you come to Pod for a makeunder?

People don't see me, they see is a person that's dressed like this.

Whose fault is that?

Myself!

I asked the public, how old is this girl?

No, don't ask them that!

Don't! No Pod, no!

I'm not answering this one.

Pod will not be refused!

Mmm... 22.

A massive 50% of the public think you are 26.

No they don't think I'm 26!

-Pod never lies!

-Oh!

Having heard what people think of your look, do you now see that you need a makeunder?

Yes, Pod, has the power!

Correct! I have decided you are a naked chicken drumstick lady

who needs my for Pod's sake "Put some clothes on" makeunder, urgently.

-Yeah.

-Let the makeunder commence.

Oh, my god!

Oh, my goodness me!

Has Pod succeeded in this makeunder?

Pod has succeeded... I'm very happy with you.

Pod is very happy with you.

-Goodbye, Mickayla!

-Bye, Pod!

I love that Mickayla was so happy with you, Pod.

It must be lovely making all these new friends!

Indeed it is! It's amazing what a successful makeunder and a lot of snogs can do for human-pod relations.

Yes, but not everybody's always quite so fond of you, are they, now?

Well, there is no accounting for taste.

Yes, but as we've learnt, Pod, some people's taste is really out there.

We've met some lovely odd-bods who your work does refuse to compute.

Yes, and what were they, Frost?

I'll tell you! They were...ejected.

Well, here are a few of our favourite ejectees.

Enjoy the weirdness!

I am Pod, who are you?

-I'm a woodland elf.

-I'm Ultraviolet Kieran.

-Collagen Girl.

-I'm Military Cybergoth.

-I'm a body modification enthusiast.

-We're the Glitter Bandits! Whoo!

Grrr!!

Have you completely lost the plot?

-Yeah!

-Yes!

-Not quite!

-Yeah!

-Quite possibly!

-No, definitely not.

I don't know!

# Super freak, super freak Super freaky... #

-Will you let Pod make you under?

-No!

-No!

-Ooh no!

-Are you serious?

-No!

-Why not?

-Cos I wanted to be an owl.

-I don't take kindly to being randomly touched by people.

Because I stand for all things plastic.

Then you have been ejected!

-Ejected?

-Charming(!)

Well, really, Frost, I could have done without that reminder of those

plastic-tastic garish Goths and freaky creepies. How could you!

All right, don't get carried away. This will make you feel a bit better...

the blonde bombshell in at number 7 actually apologised to you!

Excellent, I love an apology!

The way I dress it says that I'm fun, outgoing, outrageous,

totally individual.

When I go out I get loads of attention, I bloody love it!

Sexy, sleek, gorgeous!

I get called Barbie all the time, actually.

I quite like that, though...

I like being Barbie! Right, this is my most outrageous outfit.

I've got little hot pants on underneath.

My brother would like me probably to have a makeunder, definitely!

You reckon I should tone it down a bit?

Yeah, if you don't wanna give the wrong impression, sometimes.

OK.

-Which you do!

-Shut up!

-You know you do!

She won't change, she'll never change.

She always loves going out dressing up, it's always part of her.

I am Pod, the Personal Overhaul Device.

-You will refer to me as "Pod".

-Yes, Pod.

Could you talk me through your outfit? This shouldn't take long.

OK, basically I've just got a pink tight dress on which is netted,

it's quite see-through, little gem things here

and lots of accessories to bling it up.

Why have you come to Pod for a makeunder?

Just so people can see me for...

who I am and just not as a bit of meat, really.

I asked men, "Would you snog, marry or avoid her?"

-Snog.

-Play.

I would avoid her at all her costs.

-Trouble!

-Definitely avoid her.

Probably snog... hate that word...

and then avoid afterwards.

80% of the public said they would avoid you.

That's not very nice, is it! Are you sure that's right?

-I don't think it is!

-Pod never makes mistakes.

-Oh.

Before I transform you into a natural beauty, I need to scrub you clean and remove all that slap on your face.

-What?

-Run Phase Two: Deep Cleanse.

Now, remove all your make-up.

I hate you now! I actually hate you! There you go, is that all right?

-Your skin looks fresh and able to breathe.

-Great!

-I will now process your makeunder. Are you excited?

-Yes, ecstatic!

Run Phase Three: The Makeunder.

Oh, my god! Ooh!

-I like it!

-Do you think you look like a natural beauty?

Yeah, definitely!

Previously, 80% of men

we asked said they would avoid you.

What did they say now?

Play.

Got that classic look,

like Marilyn Monroe type of style.

It's just classy, basically, more than anything else.

-Really good.

-She's very nice, I really liked her hair.

Yeah, really 1940s inspired which looks very nice.

-100% of the men we asked want to snog you.

-And not marry, then?

-Perhaps they thought you were already married!

-Hello!

Can you see how being covered up in a flattering dress is just as sexy as having everything hanging out?

-Yeah, and I do owe you an apology.

-You didn't believe that Pod could still make you sexy, madeunder?

-Pod has made me sexy.

-Pod agrees.

-Natural beauty has been achieved. Goodbye.

-Goodbye.

Jules looks stunning and I'm sure she meant it when she said

she'd keep up the new look, but as we've found out over the years, the promises girls make to Pod, well...

they don't always keep them.

-You've gone back?

-Yeah, definitely!

-Didn't like it?

-No, I hated it!

-You hated it?

-No the hair was OK but the outfit sucked.

It was one of my favourite makeunders.

I thought you looked stunning. What is it about the pink girly look that you're addicted to?

I just love being girly and that's like, you know.

But your '40s look was so girly!

It didn't feel right, it didn't feel me.

-So Pod's basically failed?

-Failed!

-Tell Pod...

-You failed!

Well, there really is no helping some people and to think I could have got

my lens on any number of Britain's make-up maniacs who might have actually appreciated my handiwork!

Well, I for one am glad you didn't get this lot.

I love hearing the crazy beauty hints and tips straight from the streets on a Saturday night.

Here are a few of my favourites.

Oh, traitor!

I could never live without mascara.

To the M to the A to the S to the C to the R to the A - MASCRA!

Mascara!

Just moisturise yourself daily.

I love fakes - fake eyelashes, fake tan, fake hair, fake everything, I love it!

My tip is have a wash before you go out, but seriously, that's about it!

If you're natural then you're not minging!

If you spray freezing cold water on your boobs you make them pert!

-Fake tan!

-Fake tan!

-Fake tan!

-Fake tan!

-Fake and proud.

-Gotta show the legs, gotta get it out, oh, yes... that's what I call glamour!

Blusher, I cannot live without it!

Heavy, smoky eyes, strong cheeks, nudey lips.

Teeth-whitening strips.

And carry a toothbrush because remember, the first kiss is the best!

Ten minutes, I ever spent. I feel like a wag. I don't care, I feel good!

Oh, Pod loved the great British public, eh?

I most certainly do not and don't get me started on the Italian at number 6.

What do you mean, Martha is beautiful, Pod!

I'm really sexy and I've got great style and I'm totally beautiful.

# Could you be the most beautiful girl in the world...? #

I'm funny, I'm intelligent...

I don't think there is another woman in the world who gets as much attention as I do.

I've got a little skirt, just about to cover my little bum.

They're my little hot pants. I'm tiny so I wear tiny things.

There's more eyeliner, more eyeliner for me!

You think these lashes are big...

well check out these ones! I'm gonna wear them tonight.

It takes me about two and a half hours to get ready every night.

So I'm ready to go out!

My boyfriend gets a little bit concerned sometimes,

when too many men comes up to me.

I do not idolise anybody, I only idolise myself,

I'm totally in love with myself and I totally do whatever I wanna do, d'you know what I mean?

I am Pod, the Personal Overhaul Device.

Hi, Pod!

Martha, who is the most fabulous person you know?

Me!

What do you do for a living?

-I'm a make-up artist.

-Really?

-Yeah.

I make ugly people look beautiful.

In the circus?

No, everywhere, Pod! Cheeky!

Run Phase One: Public Analysis.

I asked "Does she look like a beauty queen,

"a drag queen, the queen?"

I definitely look like a beauty queen

-but I don't know what the public will say.

-Play.

I'd have to go for drag queen, I'm sorry.

Drag queen. What she's wearing is horrendous!

She looks a bit too manly for me.

Incorrect! 90% of the public think

-you look like a drag queen.

-That's bad!

Martha, you are a stripper drag queen in training and you will undergo

my "Arthur to Martha" makeunder.

-Whatever!

-Run the makeunder.

Oh, wow!

-I love it!

-What do you love?

-I just love my face...

I've got really nice face features, don't you think, Pod?

Pod agrees. This hair length frames your beautiful delicate features.

I look like a flower!

Flowers are naturally beautiful and now, so are you!

My face looks stunning.

Before, the public thought you looked like a drag queen.

-I'm Martha, I'm not Arthur!

-What do you think they will say now?

I think they will say I look stunning, cos I do!

-Shall we find out?

-Yes, I'm so excited.

-Play.

Beauty queen, natural, naturality is the way forward.

More a beauty queen than a drag queen or the Queen.

She looks like a naturally beautiful girl.

I'd say she looks like a beauty queen.

Now, 100% of the people we asked think you look like a beauty queen.

-Aw, sweet!

-Do you promise to keep this new look?

Yeah, I promise that I'll stay like this.

I just love the look. Thanks, Pod.

You're welcome. Natural beauty has been restored.

-Goodbye, Martha.

-Goodbye, Pod.

So, we're halfway through the countdown of our all-time favourite makeunders

as chosen by the Pod Mistress and myself.

Here is a quick reminder from 10 to 6.

At 10 was the naturally gorgeous and giggly Chantelle.

Hannah Hillman stormed in at 9.

At 8, Mickayla wasn't too chicken to have a makeunder.

At 7 Jules got a glamorous new look that she just couldn't make stick

and at 6 was Martha, the Italian with a passion

for her very own beautiful face.

-Are you feeling proud, Pod?

-Naturally!

We have come far, Jenny Frost, in my mission to rid the world of fakery.

So many have fallen before Pod in the battle to be natural.

Yes, but as you know, a few of our girls and boys have been known

to fight back!

# I hate you so much right now... #

Bring it on, Pod!

-Come on, bring it on! I'm ready for ya!

-You are a fake-faced fool!

Oh, that's a lovely thing to say!

-You are mean!

-Well, I don't agree with that.

-Are you stupid?

No, and you look like a man in drag.

-Cheeky little bastard!

-No way!

-Now I am fuming!

-Do you wanna slap?

-Watch your mouth, you tangerine trollop!

-How rude!

-That's rude!

-That's very rude!

-I think that's a bit rude!

-How rude!

-Well, that is just rude!

That is a bit rude!

Well, you look like you fell face first into a puddle of paint!

-How cheeky!

-I wouldn't say that, Pod!

-I would!

-Oh, Pod, come on now!

-You look completely deranged!

-Deranged? Now that is a nasty word.

-And THAT is a nasty look.

-Well, Pod, you know what? Loser!

-You'll pay for that!

-Are you gonna spank me?

-No, but I would like to hit you with some natural beauty.

-Aah!

-Oh!

-Ooh!

-You lack empathy and compassion.

-Oh, pod off, you lot!

-Whatever!

Oh, Pod, I feel a bit sorry for you right now.

Yes, well it's not always easy being the world's one and only makeunder computer

but I soldier on in the face of adversity.

Wow, all right, then, Podmaster General!

Now in at number 5 is your ultimate enemy in your war against fakery -

arch nemesis-ises don't come much bigger than this!

I love being Jodie Marsh.

She's a cool girl!

I love me! I get away with murder!

The boobs are that good now they look good in any top! I'm blessed!

I dress the way I do because it's fun and because I can.

To me, that was a normal outfit.

I've got, like, 40 tattoos...

Buddy Holly and Chuck Berry - heroes, still love their music now.

Michael Jackson, "My Crazy Life", pin-up girl, big boobs, obviously.

I fancied another tattoo.

I'm smothered. What can I say?

I discovered make-up when I was about two or three and have been using tons of it ever since!

Oh! Jodie Marsh!

-You are my arch nemesis!

-So I've been told!

You are the one I am waging a war against!

What have I done that's so bad?

You have inspired an army of Jodie clones.

All of these girls came before Pod with their tiny clothes,

layers of slap and fake tan and I have defeated them.

It is now time for me to conquer their leader.

-What do you think of this clone army?

-I think they're brilliant!

You dare to stand before Pod and say all this plastic is fantastic?

I don't know what you want from me!

-You're scary!

-You're terrifying!

-Is there anything that's not fake about you?

-I'm not that fake...

I know I wear loads of make-up but I don't have hair extensions and I've never had fake nails.

My, that is an achievement(!) But if you could just look down.

Oh, there!

Yeah, I know they're fake but what I'm saying is I'm not ALL fake.

-And if you could just look up.

-Oh!

Yeah, my eyebrows!

Why did you have your eyebrows tattooed onto your face?

To save me putting make-up on in the morning.

Why not save yourself the pain and be a natural beauty?

Because I don't have it, I don't think,

and I am often jealous when I see a girl who is naturally beautiful.

Why have you come to Pod for a makeunder?

Because I'm interested to see what you think you can do with me.

Many people have tried and failed.

-Pod will not fail.

-Yeah, I think you're gonna have trouble with me.

Not as much as you're going to have with me! Run the makeunder.

Oh, god!

So, Marsh, do you like it?

I do... I love it!

Pod thinks you look beautiful.

-Thank you.

-How does it feel to see yourself in this new light?

Before I was famous, I felt like I was a kind of half attractive girl and I would love to go back,

just even for one day to go back and be just a pretty girl again.

-Jodie...

-Yes.

-That day is today.

-I know.

-So, Marsh...

-Yes!

Will Pod be seeing you out and about looking naturally beautiful?

-Yes, I promise.

-That means that Pod has won!

Natural beauty has triumphed!

Victory is mine!

You have been an honourable opponent for Pod.

-Thank you, Miss Marsh.

-Thanks, Pod.

Goodbye.

Well, Pod, you may have won the battle but the war still rages on.

The girl at number 4 arrived with an army.

Tell me, Pod, what goes through your lens at a moment like that?

Sheer panic, terror? Tell me what?

Nothing like that, Frost! I take complete and profound joy

in the knowledge that the legion of fakes are no match for Pod, the slayer of slap.

Hi, I'm Pod, the Personal Overhaul Device.

-Hi, Pod!

-Hello, girls.

What are you known as, collectively?

We're the Neon Army...

individual a Neon Warrior.

Neon Army, what are you fighting against?

-Boringness!

-Yeah, dullness.

-Dark colours.

-Brown.

-Who is willing to undergo Pod's makeunder?

-Jane.

I would say that I don't need a makeunder...

I would say my style is a reflection of who I am and not who I am.

-Green Neon Warrior.

-Yes.

Pod does not understand slightly rubbish psycho-babble.

I pick you to be made-under!

Neon Army, you are leaving a man behind.

Neon Jane, how are you feeling about being introduced to a new you?

It's always good to change and evolve and grow so I think it's a good thing to do.

In that case, let the makeunder commence.

Oh, my god, I'm blonde!

What do you think?

I like the colour of the dress.

Not very me.

Very stylish, though.

-Do you think in your opinion you look pretty?

-Yeah.

Now you have been through the makeunder experience, what do you think about natural beauty?

I think I am naturally beautiful but then I think

I'm no less beautiful when I'm neon.

Are you ready to return to the trenches to serve with your Neon Army comrades?

Definitely!

Thank you, Jane. Say goodbye, Pod.

Goodbye, Pod.

Frost!

A-hem... Frost!

Jenny Frost!

What in Pod's name are you doing?

Sorry, Pod, got a bit caught there!

I was just thinking about one of my favourite bits of the show,

when we get to see the girls and boys out on a Saturday night throwing some shapes!

Some ridiculous shapes, Frost!

You need to lighten up and get down with this lot! Ow!

# Everybody dance now!

# Everybody, come on, let's sweat!

# Let the rhythm move you

# Dance till you can't dance no more

# Get on the floor and get raw

# Come back and upside down

# Easy now, let me see you move...

-# Move

-Let your mind put me on line

# The music is my life

# Everybody, come on let's sweat

# Let the rhythm move you

# Da da da da da da... #

Oh, it takes you back, doesn't it, Pod!

Yes, to a dark place, Frost!

Well, now it's time to reveal who made the number 3 slot in our favourite ever makeunders.

-Are you excited?

-Yes, I am, because this is what my mission is all about -

taking a tangerine-tinted, thong-flaunting make-up-mad minx and transforming her into

a sophisticated, elegant and Pod-ding stunning natural beauty.

What I loved about this particular makeunder is not only did

you change the way she looked, you changed the way she looked at herself.

Yes, I am a makeunder marvel!

My style, I would describe it as "trashy".

Is there a word to describe Jay's style?

Embarrassing!

My son Harry gets embarrassed with my look because I'm quite outrageous.

I'm not your kind of regular kind of mum.

I just stand out and he doesn't like that.

Natural beauty - what's that?!

I love my boobs... best 5 grand I've ever spent!

I'm doing a Britney Spears tonight.

I'm ripping... My boobs are too big.

# I'm not that innocent... #

I'm ready to party!

I was dancing and my trousers split!

Being made-under would just make Jay realise

that she doesn't have to do what she does to get noticed.

Fake or natural? Fake every time!

# I'm not that innocent...! #

-I am Pod, who are you?

-I'm Jay Nichols.

What in Pod's name are you wearing?

-Don't you like the skimpy look, Pod?

-No, Jay, I don't.

-I've got no knickers on!

-Is that really something to be proud of?

You really don't like it, do you?

I really don't, no.

What do you think of natural beauty?

There's no such thing as natural beauty, babe.

Pod completely disagrees.

Just how fake are you?

These are fake. My hair is pretty much fake,

my lips are fake, my eyelashes are fake, my nails are fake, my tan is fake.

-Everything else is pretty much... my eyes are my own.

-Well done!

According to my beauty files, you haven't always been a fake.

Babe, what would you rather? See me like that or like this?

-That is horrific!

-My files tell me you have a son, Harry.

What does he think of your look?

-He thinks I'm chavvy!

-I can't imagine why!

-What do you wear to parents' evening?

-My curlers.

I'd rather make it in my curlers than not at all.

Pod admires your commitment to your son, but not to your fakery.

-I asked the public, "how old is she?"

-Oh, no, this is gonna be horrid...

This is gonna upset me more than anything.

Is she 28, 34 or 40?

If they say 40, I'm gonna go mental. OK, 40.

Play...

I think she's 34, but I think she's trying to look like she's 28.

She looks like she's 40.

40 cos she seems like she's making an effort to look younger.

Really? OK.

Correct! 50% of the public think you look 40.

-Really?

-Yes.

Having heard the public's comments, do you still want a makeunder?

-Yeah, let's go for it... I'm all yours!

-Oh, my Pod!

-Are you ready for my verdict?

-Yeah, I'm listening.

-Don't be too mean.

-You are a plastic fantastic, crispy, curly, naked lady

and you will undergo my "Slummy mummy to yummy mummy" makeunder.

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god, how different do I look!

-Do you like it?

-I don't know.

Pod thinks you look utterly stunning.

Really? I'm just a bit shocked, I think.

Pod has left with you a bit of your trademark cleavage.

That's not a cleavage! If I...

-Don't do it, Jay!

-Just a little bit!

-That's better!

-Put them away, Jay!

Previously I asked the public is she 28, 34 or 40?

-Play...

-I think she's 28.

I think she looks 28 cos she looks naturally younger.

I think she's 28.

She has a youthful glow about her and she's very attractive.

Now, 40% of the people we asked think you look 28.

-Really!

-Yes, and the rest think you look your age, 34.

-OK, no 40s at all?

None. How does that make you feel?

It amazes me, it has really amazed me.

Will you be keeping any of your new natural look?

To be honest, I wouldn't go back now.

It's the end of an era and a new start for me. I've put the old Jay to rest now.

-So no more flashing your bits, then?

-No...

well, I can't help it if I'm drunk!

Pod is going to ignore that. SHE GIGGLES

Pod is very proud of you and thinks your son will be, too.

I think he will absolutely love it, bless him!

He'll want me to come in to parents' evening now. You make me all emotional!

You're not gonna make me cry.

-Pod doesn't want your make-up to run.

-No.

Pod computers your makeunder has been a complete success.

-Thank you. I've enjoyed every minute of it, babe.

-Goodbye.

-Bye bye, darling.

Aw, it looked like Jay had finally seen the light

but did she really ditch her crispy, curly ways for good?

I caught up with her to find out.

Tell me what you've kept from the makeunder.

I've kept the hair, I've still got long hair, I haven't changed my hairstyle very much.

I'm much more covered up.

I think it's kind of hit home that Harry was embarrassed by his mum

and that upset me and I thought, he's got a lot going on at his age.

The last thing he has to deal with is being embarrassed of his mum. It has totally changed me.

If it wasn't for Pod giving you that push over the edge,

how long do you think you'd have stayed stuck in that rut?

Probably till I'm about 80! I'd probably be knickerless till I was 80!

I think you're one of my favourites because it's a big drastic change.

-That's really lovely!

-And I think you look lovely.

-Thank you.

-Thank you very much.

-No, thank you!

So, Pod it's nearly time to reveal the top 2 in our best ever makeunders.

I must confess I am rather excited!

Me too, but first up, Pod, I've got a little treat for you.

There's a part of the makeunder process that you never get to see -

it's the bit where the girls reveal their new made-under look to their loved ones

and I thought it would be nice for you to see them appreciating your handiwork!

Oh, Pod love you, Jenny Frost!

You're not bad for a human being!

And I love you too, Pod, but just to warn you, you might be needing this.

# Today this could be the greatest day of our lives

# Oh, and the world comes alive

# And the world comes alive

# And the world comes alive

# Oh, oh-oh-oh

-# Stay close to me

-And the world comes alive... #

Well, Pod, we're nearly at the end of our trip down memory lane.

How are you feeling? A little emotional?

Don't be ridiculous, Frost!

Pod is a sophisticated makeunder device and is not given to the emotional displays of you humans.

Are you sure, Pod? You're looking a little bit misty-lensed to me!

I must have some dust in my circuits, that's all!

Whatever you say, Pod, but you know, a makeunder experience can be

a little overwhelming, as the prissy princess at number 2 found out.

There we go!

Well, getting ready it starts the minute she wakes up...

she straightens her hair, puts the hair extensions in.

My boyfriend always complains that I take too long getting ready, so my solution is if he does my

hair extensions for me, washes them, dries them and straightens them, then that will save me so much time.

An hour to two hours doing the make-up...

The more make-up, the better because everyone wants to look good.

Now you have the perfect pout.

A lot of girls these days backcomb their hair because it's fashionable

but people say that I go to extremes.

Keep going until it's completely knotted...

..and then just worry about it the next day when you try to brush it!

And there we go, it's all done - a big, crazy birds' nest.

She wears very little, very little -

bikinis, corsets.

This is tonight's saviour.

Less is more, so wear less, get more attention!

Five, six hours down the line she's ready to go out.

I try and act like I don't know that people are looking but I do have a look round myself and think,

has anyone noticed me?

From a boyfriend point of view, you don't really like men gawping over and paying her that much attention.

If you don't like it, don't bother looking and if you don't like me, don't talk to me,

and for everyone else, hi, I'm Princess Tamsin, nice to meet you.

I am Pod, your Personal Overhaul Device.

Please could you talk Pod through your outfit?

We have this leopard-print dress, I've got a little black belt cos I think it looks cute because it

pulls you in at the waist and it shows off my new boobs.

-New boobs?

-They're not fully settled yet but they're on the way, so...

-Did they cost you lots of money?

They didn't cost ME lots of money. They cost my dad lots of money!

Pod understands natural beauty and natural beauty only.

Well, I think this is natural beauty with a few extras.

Hmm... Do you remember what you looked like as a natural beauty?

All I know is what I look like without make-up and that is ugly, very ugly!

Tamsin, I suspect you are a gorgeous girl beneath all that make-up.

Run Phase One: Public Analysis.

I asked a cross-section of the public

"would you want to snog, marry or avoid her?"

I'm gonna guess avoid.

-Play...

-I've got to be honest

and I hope I don't come across her in the next day,

pretty cheap look,

-not a fan!

-It looks a bit slutty.

Not someone that I would personally go for.

-I'd avoid her.

-Correct.

73% of the public wanted to avoid you.

What would you say to them?

I'd say "look at the state of you"!

Pod knows you are a natural beauty under all that make-up

but do you think you can still look pretty with a more natural look?

No. To be honest, I think that to look your best, you have to put all this sort of stuff on, but Pod, I'm

-willing to give you a chance to make me look different and see if you can change my mind.

-Thank you.

Run the makeunder.

Aaah!

Oh, my God!

I look so different!

Oh, my hair looks amazing!

-What do you think?

-I can't believe it and I've not got loads of make-up on, either and I actually like it!

73% of the public wanted to avoid you before.

Now you are a natural beauty, let's see what they think. Play...

The kind of person you could take home to meet your parents.

-I'd snog her!

-Yeah, I'd give her a snog, definitely!

I would snog her because she's very pretty.

I wouldn't marry her cos...

it's too early!

Now, 70% of the public want to snog you and 30% want to marry you.

Do you feel pretty?

-Yes.

-Tamsin, why are you crying?

Just hearing the nice comments because before I just felt like that's what I needed and that.

Naturally I couldn't get people to look at me and think nice things but now...

I can see something different.

Will you ever go back to your old look?

No, not now.

The old look is trashy and rubbish and I can see why people thought the things they thought

-but now that I've seen this, there's no way I'm going back.

-Good. Makeunder mission accomplished.

-Thank you, Tamsin. Goodbye.

-Goodbye.

Before we reveal our number 1 in our all-time favourite makeunders,

here's a quick reminder of the 9 fake fans that have gone before.

In at 10, Chantelle checked in to Pod for some natural beauty therapy.

At 9 was weather whirlwind, Hannah Hillman.

At 8, bikini babe Mickayla finally got dressed.

At 7, Pod gave Jules a head-turning Hollywood look.

At 6, it was Arthur to beautiful Martha.

At 5, Pod finally faced her ultimate enemy in the war against fakery -

Miss Jodie Marsh

and at 4, she went into combat again,

this time taking on the Neon Army.

At 3 was slummy-mummy to yummy-mummy Jay

and that takes us to our lovely number 2,

the beautiful Princess Tamsin.

So this is it, Pod, the number 1 makeunder of all time,

but what is it about this makeunder that stands out for you?

Well, Jenny Frost, in all my days of fighting fakery I have never ever known a person to be hiding

so much natural beauty under layers and layers and layers and

layers and layers of fakery.

Yes, Pod, we get it... there are lots of layers!

-Well, I'm merely pointing out that this was a true triumph for Pod and natural beauty.

-Indeed it was.

I am proud to present the number 1 makeunder of all time, he's blonde,

he's orange, he's nuts, he's Scotland's number 1 male Barbie.

It's the lovely Ross.

Orange or darker is one of the best skin colours you can have.

# Golden brown... #

It makes you stand out in a crowd if you're the darkest one there and I intend to be the darkest one there.

I've been living in Aberdeen all my life.

I don't really know any other people in this area that look like me.

# Sexy boy... #

I wear more make-up than my mum, quite a lot of foundation as you can see...

I apply it really thickly, cake it on.

There's no such thing as too much make-up.

I'm going for a kind of Beyonce look with my skin colour.

This is foundation for black people. I like my face to be very dark so this is what I'm gonna use now.

It can be just too much, it just looks ridiculous, I think, sometimes.

Well, Ross's look is eccentric and outrageous.

I own lots and lots of fake gold jewellery.

I don't think you can ever have enough because it looks really special.

This is gangster bling, lots and lots of bling.

I got a lot, a lot of attention the night I wore this.

I know I've got the body and the bum to carry them off. Some people don't, but I do.

When I'm out I get recognised a lot.

It's that blonde boy from college, or that blonde boy from that bar.

It makes me feel kind of, I don't know, famous maybe.

Just the attention, I just love attention.

I'm Scotland's number one male Barbie and I absolutely love it!

I am Pod, who are you?

-I'm Ross.

-No, you are orange!

I love being orange, as orange as I can possibly be.

-Why?

-Cos I think it's the best skin colour, ever!

Pod has never met such a fake tan fanatic! Do you ever think about anything else?

I do think about fake tan quite a lot, actually.

-I do dream about it, sometimes. Those are good dreams.

-That is Pod's worst nightmare!

-What's wrong with being pale and interesting?

-Ugh! Pale's not interesting...

-It's nasty!

-Did you go back to the '80s to get that haircut?

-No!

-Pod has found a style match.

I love Mr T's bling... and his hairstyle!

I pity the fool that copies Mr T!

Shut your mouth, fool!

-What do you think of natural beauty?

-Huh, natural beauty(!)

That says it all.

Run Phase One: Public Analysis. I asked the public,

"would a night out with him be the night of your life,

"a night to forget, a nightmare?"

Definitely the night of your life!

Look at me, d'you know what I mean!

-Play...

-Definitely a nightmare, probably the worst ever.

He's not the kind of guy I'd go out with.

I don't know whether we'd have much in common.

A night with him would be a nightmare because he looks like a drama queen.

I'm not!

-No-one thought a night out with you would be the night of their life.

-Are you serious?

Yes. Most people thought it would be a night to forget.

-That's not true at all!

-How are you feeling about the public's comments?

I'm shocked, I'm genuinely shocked.

I think I look like a really fun person to have a great night out with.

Run Phase Two: Deep Cleanse.

-Please put on the deep cleanse uniform.

-Oh, dear!

It is now time to peel back the orange and reveal your real face.

-Yeah... let's go.

-Get wiping, Ross.

In all Pod's days of fighting fakery, I have never seen so much slap come off a human's face!

Show me that wipe!

-Pod is practically speechless!

-Quite a difference, isn't it?

Yes, but I can already see you have been hiding a lovely face.

-Thanks, Pod.

-That will do, Ross.

Pod will take care of those piercings and your ridiculous hands.

Now, are you ready to meet the new you?

-Yes, I'm excited, Pod.

-So am I.

Run Phase Three : The Makeunder.

Oh!

-What a shock!

-Well?

-I don't know what to say!

That is unusual!

I really like it! I thought I'd look really, really like dead without all

the fake tan but I'm impressed with my natural skintone.

-Has Pod changed your opinion of natural beauty?

-Definitely changed my opinion, yes.

-Pod computes this makeunder has been a complete success.

-Thank you, Pod.

-Goodbye.

-Goodbye.

-Hi, Dad.

-Oh, hi, Ross.

-Wow! Wow! Wow!

-Do you like it?

-Yeah, it's a lot better!

-Do I look human?

-Human again!

It's great! Wow, I'm impressed! Had you forgotten what you looked like?

-Yeah, I had!

-It's nice to have my son back.

-Thanks, Dad.

-Maybe we should just go for a beer now.

-Let's go for a pint.

Come on, then.

Well, Pod, that's it, it's been fun looking back all those makeunder memories...

so many girls, so much make-up and so many natural beauties.

And so much more work to do!

I will never rest in my mission to restore the world to a state of stunning natural beauty.

Well, it's time to get some rest now, it's been quite a night!

-Indeed it has, The Frost, and I need to be ready to face some more fakery tomorrow.

-Yes, you do...

cos I've got a feeling you'll be having some sweet dreams tonight. Pod off!

# Before the day I met you

# Life was so unkind

# You are the key to my peace of mind

# Cos you make me feel

# You make me feel

# You make me feel like a natural woman

# Yeah, you make me feel like a natural woman... #

Natural beauty has been restored.

Goodbye.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd