Episode 1 That's Britain!


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Episode 1

Nick Knowles and Julia Bradbury present a warm-hearted studio show about the good, the bad and the ugly in modern Britain. With Grainne Seoige, Ade Edmondson and Shaun Williamson.


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Hello and welcome to That's Britain. Over the next four weeks, we are

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here to help you let off steam about the things in modern Britain

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that drive us up the wall. From roadworks, to recycling, we will

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get to the bottom of whatever makes you grumpy. On That's Britain

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tonight: Grainne Seoige asks whether we are a nation drowning in

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junk mail. We go on the hunt for Britain's most perilous pothole.

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Stanley Johnson tests whether we are a nation of secret say mar tans

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with a hidden camera sting. EastEnders' Shaun Williamson

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campaigns to bring back the bus conductor -- say mar tans. There

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they are, our team of intrepid reporters who will be travelling to

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length and breadth of the country to try and fix "Broken Britain".

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Stanley Johnson, Grainne Seoige and Shaun Williamson. Each week we have

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a report from our special investigator, Ade Edmondson. He's

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got an access all areas pass to see how Britain works, or sometimes

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doesn't. Tonight, he slipped past airport security to find out what

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happens to our luggage when we kiss it goodbye at the airport. We want

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to hear from you. It is your show. This is our WordWall. Yes! We know

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it often feels as if you are talking to the wall and you are on

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That's Britain! The wall talks back. You tell us what is driving you mad

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and our magic wall turns your gripes into grumpy graffiti.

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want to know what is getting your goat - queues, fly-tippers,

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Christmas? If it is getting on your nerves, we want it on our wall. The

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more e-mails we get, the bigger the word is on the wall. You have been

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e-mailing us all week. This is what is irritating Britain right now. So

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far, you are grumpy about - Tube drivers... That's because they are

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talking about going on strike on Boxing Day. I can understand that

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one. Bus lanes. Express checkouts. Small one on the left. I don't like

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express checkouts because I like people. I like people so we agree

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on that one. Queues at petrol stations. They have turned them

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into shopping centres! People get their petrol and go off shopping

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for 20 minutes. I don't get the squeaky bottles. What is going on

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there? We will find out. Lots of people are upset about it. We will

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be updating the wall later in the show. So keep the e-mails coming in

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by going to bbc.co.uk/thatsbritain. Or e-mailing

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talktothewall@bbc.co.uk and put the thing getting your goat in the

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title of the e-mail. You can tell us why in the body of the e-mail

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but put the word you want on the word in the title space. No

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politics or people's names. Our names might pop up quickly! Of

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course, you can join in with everything we are talking about by

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tweeting us - @bbcthatsbritain or go to our Facebook page. One of the

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things you have been talking to the wall about is junk mail. According

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to Which? Magazine, we are bombarded with 11 billion pieces of

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junk mail a year. 11 billion! To give you some idea of the numbers

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that we are dealing with, that much paper weighs the same as 50,000

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double-decker buses. Ridiculous! Why do we get so much of it? More

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importantly, can we stop it? Grainne Seoige has been to

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investigate. Direct mail or junk mail drives many of us around the

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bend. We don't ask for it. You have no interest in reading it. It never

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has to throw it away. Who is responsible for this growing pile

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of waste paper and how do companies get hold of our details to target

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us? The answer might surprise you. How do you feel about junk mail?

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despise it. Don't like it. I never look at it. It goes into the

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recycling. Do you get a lot of junk mail? Yeah, much too much.

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don't like it? No. It is a waste of trees! You may think those piles on

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your doormat are growing and you would be right. Until a year ago

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there was a cap on how many pieces the Royal Mail could deliver to

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your home. The bar was set at three a week but then the limits were

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axed. Royal Mail can deliver as much as they want. I have recruited

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some help from the kind residents of the North London suburb of Stoke

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Newington. They will stockpile their junk mail and keep tabs on

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the amount of it that comes through their doors. I hope they have

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plenty of room for storage. Some days I only get junk mail. I don't

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get ordinary post any more! haven't opened it up until now. It

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is going straight in the bin. when it is finished with, junk mail

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is a sizeable monster to dispose of. A staggering 11 billion pieces are

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delivered every year, that is five million dead trees, or chopping

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down an area the size of Epping Forest annually. Junk mail is the

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gift that keeps on giving so someone must think it is a good

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idea otherwise why would we keep getting it? I have come to the

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place that celebrates junk mail, the Direct Marketing Association

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represents hundreds of companies sending unsolicited advertising

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into our homes. How can this be good business practice? Advertising

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mail generates �16 billions of sales each year and about 300,000

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jobs. You believe it works as a form of advertising? Absolutely it

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does. More than 17 million people purchase from a catalogue in the

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last 12 months and when it is well targeted, it is particularly

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effective. It's been said to us that without this type of

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advertising, there would be no Royal Mail. Is that what you are

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suggesting? I think that is very true. More than a quarter of the

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revenue that the Royal Mail generates is from advertisers and

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if you took that revenue out, it would be unsustainable. Even some

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of those who actually push junk mail through our letterboxs have

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recognised the Royal Mail's dependency on it. This postie asked

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us not to reveal his identity. probably deliving 2,000 to 3,000

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items of junk mail a week. It is like the Royal Mail are competing

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for the least lucrative market which is junk mail. In Stoke

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Newington, how is our junk mail spot check going? What our

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householders are finding is they are receiving a mix of hand-

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delivered advertising sheets from local businesses and unaddressed

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and directly addressed material delivered by the Royal Mail.

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Catalogues. Estate agents. Food. Improving the home. Gardeners. More

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builders. How do businesses that we haven't given our personal details

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to get hold of them? That information can come from an

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unlikely source. It's someone who has to know where we live - the

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Government. They are selling an edited version of the electoral

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register which contains our names and addresses. That is how Direct

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Marketing Companies know who we are and where we live. I'm going to see

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Caroline Spelman to see what she has to say about the Government

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trading our details. You sell on an edited version of the electoral

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register, that is how they have the information. It is one source by

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which companies acquire information about our address and our name. But

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there's more than one way in which they receive that information.

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fact, Caroline Spelman has just launched an opt-out scheme to limit

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junk mail and she sees no conflict of interest with the Government

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selling our addresses. You have the perfect opportunity to take back

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some power and control over what comes through your letterbox. From

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April next year, you will have an easy way to stop that unsolicited

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junk mail coming and have some control over what comes through

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your letterbox. The agreement covers half of all junk mail.

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What's clear is that this scheme isn't comprehensive and while the

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Government is making a lot of noise on the one hand about addressing

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junk mail, while they and big business are still buying and

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selling our details, all they are going to do is address the effects

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and not the cause. What about how this could impact on the Royal

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Mail? If the volume of junk mail drops surely their revenue will

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drop? Pushing up the price of a stamp perhaps? Will we be willing

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to pay extra for less junk mail? would be happy to do that. If they

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could stop it, I would pay more for my stamps. 48p for a first-class.

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So you don't think you should pay any more? No. We will see the

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effects on the Royal Mail and junk mail when the scheme launches next

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April. What about our snapshot of how some householders are being

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affected now? After three weeks of junk mail collection, the final

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tally is nearly 800 pieces from just 20 houses. That is 40 pieces

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per house and a lot of wasted paper. What to do with all that junk mail?

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We have given it to Michelle Reader to see if she can give purpose to

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what many people consider to be unwanted, intrusive and unnecessary.

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Can junk mail ever be a thing of beauty?

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APPLAUSE OK. You have brought your friend into the studio. Beauty is

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in the eye of the beholder. This is Michelle Reader's creation. It is

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an extraordinary amount of junk mail. He is very hardy. He is

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wearing shorts and a short-sleeved top. That has to say an awful lot

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for his ability to do the job. is amazing how much rubbish comes

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through the door? Absolutely. It took six days to make. Tell us

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about the opt-out clause in April? How does it affect us? You can stop

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some of it. There is a one-stop- shop replacing a system where there

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are three websites to go to now. Any company that has signed up with

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the Direct Marketing Association, you come off that list and you

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don't get anything delivered through them. Anybody here signed

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up? It is launching in a while. will this affect the Royal Mail?

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was said that the Royal Mail really needs the revenue that it gets from

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people signing up to have their junk mail delivered. So we asked

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the Royal Mail would they be affected. They said the number of

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letters that people and businesses send to each other is in

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significant decline. The UK has one of the most high quality postal

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services there is. It needs to be paid for. That is why it is

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important that Royal Mail behaves like any other commercial business

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and handles as many mail items as possible. They need to do this.

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Direct mail has a legitimate purpose. Thousands of companies

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large and small sign up and we are proud to play an important role in

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supporting economic growth within the UK. LAUGHTER Who said "ah"?

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Royal Mail aren't the only ones who deliver junk mail? Absolutely.

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There are other businesses that send junk mail also. I want to

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point out five million trees! never mind the trees... Yes! Never

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mind the trees! The thing is, people are finding it hard to make

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a living. These businesses that are posting these leaflets, if you are

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running a pizza shop, or a window sales shop, you have to get it out

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there some way. I was a bit like you in that this stuff annoyed me

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until I looked into it further. This is the only way they can

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advertise. They can't pay for big splashes in the magazines. This is

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the way they get the word out. It is a shame we get so much of it.

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Grainne will be looking at overcrowding on trains next week.

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Thank you. Breathe in! APPLAUSE Supermarkets self-checkouts, you

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can get through an entire day without ever speaking to another

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human being. That's Britain is trying to change that. We want to

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bring back the personal touch to our daily lives by bringing back

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the jobs we have lost to technology and cost-cutting. Here is Shaun

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Williamson to explain what he would Progress is amazing. It is daunting

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even if you think about it. In the last 50 years we have built trains

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which run under the sea, motorways which criss-cross the country and

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planes which carry over 170 million of us in-and-out of the UK every

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year. But you know what? I think we have lost something along the way.

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Now, hang on! Wait for me! Wait for me! Thanks, Mr Conductor. You are

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Where have all the bus conductor has gone? There is no one to

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welcome you, no sense of community, no camaraderie. The best you can

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hope for is a man who keeps his eyes on the road, instead of the

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yobs at the back of the bus, throwing crisps. Bus conductors

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were once an everyday sight. Back in 1965, there were nearly 80,000

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of them, but the drive to cut costs put paid to them, and today there

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are only a handful left. For one day only, we are begging an old

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tradition back to the streets of Brighton. The route must of course,

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a driver called Dale, and me, a bus conductor with a mission. All

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aboard! Are you working? A I'm trying to. The fantastic. How much

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do I owe you? Please take a seat. Do you remember bus conductors?

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you could ask them questions about where you were going, where was the

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best place to stop. For we are doing this to bring back the bus

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conductor. How do you feel about that? A very happy, brings back my

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childhood, when I was going to school. Do you remember them as

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grumpy or friendly? For an Lea, always. As it gets busier, more of

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my passengers want to return to the good old days. Young mothers with

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pushchairs, travelling with the baby in their arms, the conductor

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would help. If you stood up when the boss was moving, the bus

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conductor would shout at them. Could you tell me who this is.

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It is Blakey, the star of sitcom On the buses. I have got to be honest,

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I am having a great time, and I think the passengers are really

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enjoying having a conductor back on board the bus. The crunch question,

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as always, if is would they be willing to pay to see my cheery

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chubby face every day? It is not cheap running a bus service, and

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bringing back conductors could bring up fares by a quarter, 20p on

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a �1 ticket. I would, yes. I have got someone! It sounds good

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actually, particularly when my children I using the bus to go to

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school. When you multiply that by the amount of journeys they do, it

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is a lot. Bringing it back should not just be about money, because

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most of the people I spoke to said they would feel safer with a bus

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conductor on the bus. You had fun. I want to be a bus

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conductor. I know that would be a tragedy for the acting industry.

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What a lovely job. You yourself mentioned Yorkshire beat cheeky

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face, do you think that helped you in pursuit of your job? It helped

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me on the day because a lot of people recognised me, but it is

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about being helpful, polite. What people wanted was an authority

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figure on board who could potentially put themselves between

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you and your boss, or whatever. -- you and yobs. Presumably some of

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them would never have seen a bus conductor before? There was a young

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Polish man who got on, I asked him if they had bus conductors in

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Poland. He said yes, they do. I said, are they popular? He said no,

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they get killed because they ask for money. I would like to cancel

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next week pothole bus conductor special from Warsaw! Tell me about

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the kit. One of the sounds of my childhood. That will get you home.

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I might need a lift after the show! It is just a wonderful experience,

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it really was. Thank you for doing that. Shaun Williamson.

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He says bus conductors would bring back a sense of community, so we

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Lines will be closing at about quarter to nine, so you haven't got

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very long. We will bring you the result later. Let's have a look at

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our WordWall to see what has been vexing you so far this evening.

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Remember, you e-mail us to tell us what is getting on your nerves, and

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we put it on the wall. A lot of you were unhappy about duped drivers,

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bus lanes. Since then... You have inundated us. It has been a better

:19:56.:20:06.
:20:06.:20:11.

than a good -- been an avalanche. had a feeling dog poo would feature

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on tonight's show! People are really worried about it. We have

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got a piece on letter coming up later. That is very interesting,

:20:21.:20:31.
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the bin men. Lane hogs, people hanging in the middle laying.

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your foot down, not the time encouraging you to speed. Steve

:20:39.:20:44.

Ryan pothole says people who park in front of petrol bombs and don't

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buy fuel. Alice Clark is annoyed about rubbish outside fast-food

:20:53.:20:58.

outlets. It you have a shop that produces rubbish like that, you

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should do something about it. The last couple of years have been talk

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for local councils with government cuts forcing them to tighten their

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belts. It doesn't seem to stop councils spending money on things

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that many of you feel should not be a priority. This is the part of the

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show we are calling don't get me started. Staffordshire County

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Council have got 71 balls! They have been installed outside the new

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�30 million office building. To us they might look like balls, but the

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council say the bollards are an essential and two terrorism measure,

:21:43.:21:48.

and they also say they prevent ram- raiding on the offices. Sounds like

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:21:58.:21:58.

absolute bollards to me. How much did they cost? 20,000. 8000. The

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onset is �587 each, total cost 40 grand. �40,000 might get you

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started, but still in the Midlands, Warwickshire County Council might

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be getting you started because of the statue. It is called gold Leaf:

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Buried Sunlight and you can see that being put up in the Pooley

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Country Park. It is covered in small gold coloured sheets of metal.

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They say they chose the design because it is thought provoking and

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would distract people from the nearby motorway. How much do you

:22:39.:22:47.

think it cost? 15,000. I will give you �10 for it. A in fact, it cost

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Warwickshire council �100,000 to put up. I might fancy looking at

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the motorway instead, wouldn't you? The way things are going, it's

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ridiculous. Finally, how about this. This is what some residents in

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Bristol are calling the bridge to know where. It is the replacement

:23:08.:23:14.

for a damaged road bridge. It used to be used heavily by cars, but

:23:14.:23:23.

this is simply a footbridge. Only pedestrians, pedestrians and horse

:23:23.:23:28.

riders can use this. How much do you think it cost? Quarter of a

:23:28.:23:36.

million. They have gone big this time. �1.6 million. Me and the boys

:23:36.:23:40.

would have quoted a quarter of that and still been very happy with it.

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While we were... We have slowed down. While we were filming, we

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worked out an average ourselves. Four people crossed the bridge in

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an hour. At that rate of use, if everybody paid �1 for the return

:23:58.:24:03.

trip, it would be paid for in 68 years. A local councillor said you

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just can't get a bridge over a motorway for less than �1.6 million.

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So, a bargain really. If you know any more of these examples, get in

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touch. Flying seems to be more annoying

:24:23.:24:28.

than ever these days. Airport security delays, cancellations for

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fog. This morning I was stuck on the runway at Manchester. There was

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a point when they thought I would not make the show. I was going to

:24:37.:24:42.

be on my own. Recently one airline even forcing passengers to pay for

:24:42.:24:49.

the plane's fuel. But what drives us up the wall is when it airlines

:24:49.:24:57.

lose our bags. How hard can it be? One man can tell us. Ade Edmondson

:24:57.:25:01.

is our insider, and he has been on a mission to follow his own

:25:01.:25:10.

suitcase on an incredible journey, starting in Manchester. Over 29

:25:10.:25:15.

million pieces of luggage go missing every year. 29 million!

:25:15.:25:20.

Although the people in charge prefer the word mishandled than

:25:20.:25:30.
:25:30.:25:31.

lost. Get mishandled! He is never going to get that in there! To

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avoid my own separation anxiety... From Manchester to Heathrow to

:25:35.:25:44.

Amsterdam - yes, two flights. It is handover time. So you are going to

:25:44.:25:54.
:25:54.:25:54.

print a sticky label? I am, yes. The bag number is completely

:25:54.:26:01.

unique? Yes, it is. So if my bag went to Timbuktu, someone could

:26:01.:26:07.

scam that and say it is my bag. So it is fully international, who

:26:07.:26:11.

knew? It doesn't matter where it goes missing, it should always come

:26:11.:26:16.

back to me. You might think it is on its home from here run-in. It's

:26:16.:26:22.

not, there are cameras everywhere, scanning my barcode, which allows

:26:22.:26:30.

people like Charlie to track every move my bag makes. This is how many

:26:30.:26:34.

times it has been seen, and these are the update afterwards. It has

:26:34.:26:42.

been through the scanner. It is boarding time for me. Let's hope it

:26:42.:26:47.

is boarding time for my bag. In the same way I go through a gate, my

:26:47.:26:56.

bag is separated to make a beeline for my flight. Thank you. These

:26:56.:27:02.

trays are the last step. They read my barcode and tip my bag on to the

:27:02.:27:07.

right section for my flight. We are not allowed to film on the plane,

:27:07.:27:13.

so I will see you at the other end. We are flying south to the hadron

:27:13.:27:17.

collider of baggage sorting. Heathrow's state-of-the-art

:27:17.:27:24.

Terminal 5. I am guessing my bag is going to find this quite a

:27:24.:27:29.

challenge because Terminal 5 is enormous. How will my bag make it

:27:29.:27:36.

amongst the thousands of other bags that are here? Welcome to the

:27:36.:27:40.

baggage sorting plant. It is a quarter of a mile long. It is like

:27:40.:27:46.

an epic version of every game you ever played as a kid. There is some

:27:46.:27:52.

scale extracts, a bit of pinball, some roller-coaster as... And a

:27:52.:27:57.

ghost train. It is like a theme park for bags. Very important when

:27:57.:28:01.

it lands that it is facing the right way, so they have this

:28:01.:28:07.

scanner. That arch is a camera, it takes a shot, says it is facing the

:28:07.:28:11.

wrong direction so it it just the flippers to make sure it is going

:28:11.:28:20.

the right way. Perfect! 40-50,000 bags go through here every day, and

:28:20.:28:24.

how do they know what is going where? Surveillance. This package

:28:24.:28:27.

manager is responsible for everything that passes through here.

:28:27.:28:33.

I can see Scanners everywhere. How many times will my bag be looked

:28:33.:28:43.
:28:43.:28:44.

at? Up to 400 times, it will pass through scanners. These blue ones

:28:44.:28:54.
:28:54.:28:55.

go about 30,000 mph, don't they? They do. Can I go on one? No!

:28:55.:29:00.

are essentially intelligent bag machines. There is a computer chip

:29:00.:29:10.
:29:10.:29:10.

saying exactly where each bag needs to go. After 18 kilometres of

:29:10.:29:14.

sophisticated computer wizardry, your bag eventually comes face-to-

:29:14.:29:18.

face with the most advanced technology the world has to offer.

:29:18.:29:24.

Philip. Yes, no one has yet invented a robot as efficient as

:29:24.:29:31.

the human at packing bags into a They get a last check on that?

:29:31.:29:35.

do. If it goes green, we can load it. If it goes red, we investigate

:29:35.:29:39.

it to make sure it doesn't go on the flight. A green light means

:29:39.:29:43.

this bag is in the right container for the right plane and it can make

:29:43.:29:53.
:29:53.:29:56.

its way to the aircraft's hold. I better dash! Amsterdam. Cheese,

:29:56.:30:02.

tulips, windmills and clogs - don't think I pack any of them! -- don't

:30:02.:30:08.

think I packed any of them! There's my bag. You can see my bag. Very

:30:08.:30:14.

distinctive. Family heirloom. There you go. There's my bag. And I

:30:14.:30:17.

shouldn't really be very surprised because I have looked at the

:30:17.:30:21.

figures and the chance of your bag going missing, delayed but catching

:30:21.:30:31.

up with you, is 1.2%. The chance of your bag getting absolutely lost is

:30:31.:30:36.

0.00005%. You would have to take 200,000 flights to be guaranteed

:30:36.:30:42.

that your bag would go missing. It is not bad, is it? Right, well,

:30:43.:30:49.

experiment over. I better get back to London. I hope they don't lose

:30:49.:30:53.

my bag! APPLAUSE

:30:53.:31:01.

So, that all went swimmingly? gobsmacked by the amount of

:31:01.:31:05.

technology they got back there. When you see your bag disappearing

:31:05.:31:09.

you think it is going to a big empty shed where three blokes

:31:09.:31:12.

smoking fags and reading a paper might kick it in two or three hours

:31:12.:31:22.

and then put it on to the wrong plane! This is reassuring then?

:31:22.:31:25.

Except we finished filming and on the way back to London my bag went

:31:25.:31:32.

missing. No?! Not stunt missing? went missing. Got it two days later.

:31:32.:31:41.

Right. Who were you flying with? EasyJet! We did ask easyJet what

:31:41.:31:51.
:31:51.:32:07.

happened to your bag and this is I still think it is the weirdest

:32:07.:32:12.

thing to tie a bit of paper on all your valuables and just chuck it in

:32:12.:32:17.

there. The best bit of advice I had was to write your name and

:32:17.:32:21.

telephone number on an A 4 piece of paper and put it on the inside of

:32:21.:32:26.

the case. If the label comes off, people will see there's your

:32:26.:32:32.

contact details. What if it gets lost lost? If it is not claimed in

:32:32.:32:37.

three months, it goes to auction. Really? Yes. You can buy other

:32:37.:32:42.

people's luggage. LAUGHTER bizarre. Randomly? Yes, we bought a

:32:42.:32:51.

case so this might be yours! LAUGHTER I'm very excited now.

:32:51.:32:58.

seems to be 500 bits of paper giving your name and address, Nick!

:32:58.:33:04.

PHONE RINGS What? When? How? Where? How hard can it be? I'm on my way.

:33:04.:33:09.

Sorry, got another mission to investigate. See you next week.

:33:09.:33:18.

Still to come: We are out on the beat with the men and women who

:33:18.:33:24.

police our rubbish. We will find out where in Britain has the worst

:33:24.:33:28.

pothole. We meet a hidden hero who keeps the

:33:28.:33:38.
:33:38.:33:39.

blood flowing through the veins of the NHS. APPLAUSE Now, let's talk

:33:39.:33:45.

rubbish. You do every day! Barely a day goes by without another rule

:33:45.:33:50.

telling us how to put our bins out, recycling, it never stops. What is

:33:50.:33:55.

it like for people who have to enforce our rubbish laws and keep

:33:55.:34:00.

Britain tidy? This is a dream job for me. Meet the environmental

:34:00.:34:03.

enforcement officers, or the bin cops. We are following the working

:34:03.:34:07.

lives of bin cops from three different cities - in Preston we

:34:07.:34:13.

will be with Gary and Paul. In Oxford Dan and Mandy. First in

:34:13.:34:16.

Hereford, Craig. Craig likes to lead from the front. This morning

:34:16.:34:22.

he's on litter patrol in Hereford town centre. The team was set up to

:34:22.:34:26.

address environmental crime and part of that is obviously littering.

:34:26.:34:29.

Now, with the team out and about, it makes a big difference. That is

:34:29.:34:34.

what we are trying to do, make a difference. Just seconds into the

:34:34.:34:42.

patrol, Craig's quick to the draw with his fixed penalty pad! I'm an

:34:42.:34:47.

enforcement officer. You just put your cigarette butt on the floor

:34:47.:34:54.

making no attempt to pick it up. That is littering. Is it Mrs, Miss?

:34:54.:34:58.

That is an �80 fine reduced for quick payment but still an

:34:58.:35:01.

expensive habit. Dropping a cigarette on the street became an

:35:01.:35:05.

environmental crime in 1990. come round that corner, you know

:35:05.:35:11.

they are going to be there. I don't miss much! It is not long before

:35:11.:35:18.

Craig has two more smokers in his sights. Craig moves in for the kill.

:35:18.:35:23.

Are we in trouble? You are. Your cigarette butt went down that drain.

:35:23.:35:33.
:35:33.:35:34.

The penalty? Another �80 fine for littering a water course. There are

:35:34.:35:35.

plenty of bins nearby, positioned on the wall. There is a bin at the

:35:35.:35:39.

far end. Then they walked away. At which point, I approached them,

:35:39.:35:44.

pointed out the offence to them and they fully accepted it.

:35:44.:35:49.

counties east, we are in Oxford, a city of dreaming spires and

:35:49.:35:52.

Britain's brightest young brains. It seems the students aren't so

:35:52.:36:00.

clever when it comes to rubbish. Mandy and Dan are a couple of

:36:00.:36:02.

environmental enforcement officers and it is all about education,

:36:03.:36:06.

education, education. We are with the council. Just noticed the bits

:36:06.:36:12.

that you have got down here. Yeah. Any intentions on moving it? We had

:36:12.:36:17.

it in the recycling bin. Somebody knocked it over. If you could get

:36:17.:36:21.

it back into the recycle bin. If you can pile that back into your

:36:21.:36:26.

recycle bin, that will be brilliant. In Oxford they only collect the

:36:26.:36:31.

rubbish once a fortnight. We are going to go designer! It is an

:36:31.:36:37.

offence to put your waste out too early, too late, in the wrong bin,

:36:37.:36:43.

or in the wrong place. When bags appear where they shouldn't, Dan

:36:43.:36:47.

and Mandy have to find out where the rubbish has come from so it is

:36:47.:36:55.

on with the forensic gloves and time to dig for clues. We call it

:36:55.:37:01.

bin diving! Bin dip! You have to make it slightly entertaining!

:37:01.:37:07.

There's tissues in there covered in blood. This one smells of fish.

:37:07.:37:12.

Hungry work this bin-dipping! want a grape? I will pass.

:37:12.:37:19.

sure? Jiffy bag has been sent to one of the occupants of the flat

:37:19.:37:23.

just here. They have identified a culprit from a letter. From one

:37:23.:37:28.

small carrier bag we've so far got one, two, three, four-pieces of

:37:29.:37:33.

evidence from it so definitely what we deem a good bag. The offender

:37:33.:37:36.

could be prosecuted but Dan and Mandy are keen to talk to them

:37:36.:37:41.

first before taking the matter further. But up in Preston, ex-

:37:41.:37:46.

coppers Gary and Paul take a very different approach. Yes, it is

:37:46.:37:50.

tough love up north. They have been called to a cemetery where rubbish

:37:50.:37:55.

has been dumped. We will have a look now to see if we can find any

:37:55.:38:03.

evidence. LAUGHTER It's a thong! While Gary searches for that

:38:03.:38:07.

evidence, Paul speaks to the womans who house backs on to the site

:38:07.:38:12.

where the rubbish has been dumped. How long has this been here?

:38:12.:38:17.

claims to know nothing about it. Feel the weight of that! That is

:38:17.:38:24.

one soiled nappy. To do that in a cemetery is just ridiculous.

:38:24.:38:30.

have a bag here, it is a white bin bag full of household waste items,

:38:30.:38:37.

you've got cardboard, cans, plastics. Then unfortunately, for

:38:38.:38:42.

her, she's left a letter in it. I've got the evidence here. It's

:38:42.:38:46.

got her address on. Got the tenancy date. It's got to be her. I have

:38:47.:38:50.

proven her to be a liar. She had a brief moment in life where she

:38:50.:38:54.

could have done the honourable thing and own up and maybe we might

:38:54.:38:59.

have taken a different approach. Now that me and Gary have had to go

:38:59.:39:03.

through this mess here, that is it, she will be prosecuted. It is

:39:03.:39:07.

simple as that. Prosecution can mean anything from prison to a

:39:07.:39:14.

maximum fine of �50,000. To come and dump waste in a cemetery is

:39:14.:39:23.

just beyond contempt. Even in death, no peace! I like Gary and Paul.

:39:23.:39:30.

They gave her a chance. She didn't. She didn't own up. As for Dan and

:39:30.:39:34.

Mandy, clearing up after students, good luck with that! Yes. I like

:39:34.:39:39.

Craig. He said he wants to make a difference. My dream scenario...

:39:39.:39:46.

Too fast on the fines, it was only a cigarette! Only a cigarette? Made

:39:46.:39:51.

of plastic which takes 500 years to decompose. As we saw there, make a

:39:51.:39:56.

mistake with your rubbish, the bin cops will nick you. Stop smoking!

:39:56.:40:05.

Makes me cool! What goes in what? I will make a four-course meal.

:40:05.:40:10.

me run you through this. This is for paper and magazines. Clothing

:40:11.:40:16.

and textiles, plastic bottles. Cardboard. Food waste inside,

:40:16.:40:22.

outside. For the squirrels? Glass tins, foil, aerosol. Finally, your

:40:22.:40:26.

general rubbish. I am a recycling queen. We have a responsibility to

:40:26.:40:30.

recycle. This is too complicated and too much! But to be fair, North

:40:30.:40:34.

Staffordshire council toed us this is an award-winning scheme which

:40:34.:40:37.

has doubled the amount of recycling there. I think that people

:40:37.:40:40.

shouldn't recycle. I think you pay your rates and then the council

:40:40.:40:46.

should deal with it. Oh, I get it! People clear up after you? No, it

:40:46.:40:49.

is not that. If the Government cared that much about it, they

:40:49.:40:53.

would tell the supermarkets to make all packaging biodegradable instead

:40:53.:40:58.

of trying to tax people who are finding it hard enough to make ends

:40:58.:41:04.

meet. Personal! Personal responsibility! Earlier in the show,

:41:04.:41:08.

Shaun Williamson launched our campaign to bring some of our much-

:41:08.:41:14.

loved services starts with the bus conductor. We asked would you be

:41:14.:41:18.

willing to pay an extra 25p on your bus fare to bring them back? We

:41:18.:41:24.

will tell you later. The lines are now closed. We British like to

:41:24.:41:28.

think that we are a helpful bunch but is it really true? Stanley

:41:28.:41:32.

Johnson has been testing our public spirit with some hidden cameras.

:41:32.:41:37.

What is it about? We are aiming to find out how helpful are we? Is

:41:37.:41:42.

there a secret say mar tan in us? Are we still opening doors? We went

:41:42.:41:46.

off with the secret cameras to Birmingham and we said just how far

:41:47.:41:56.

can we push this? -- Samaritan. Let's see how he got on. My job is

:41:56.:42:02.

to see how many shoppers will stop and help our actor Harry park this,

:42:02.:42:06.

his beloved old banger, in the parking space. We are conducting

:42:06.:42:10.

our experiment in the car park of a busy Birmingham shopping mall

:42:10.:42:13.

during lunch hour. It's the perfect place to see if we British are good

:42:13.:42:20.

eggs or are rotten stinkers. Here is Harry getting his car in

:42:20.:42:24.

position. Already in character, he is making a complete pig's ear of

:42:24.:42:32.

it! To record the experiment, we have got cameras hidden in the car,

:42:32.:42:37.

our crew van, behind this window, and in this bag. I will be keeping

:42:37.:42:43.

a close eye on the action nearby. Time to see if Harry can get anyone

:42:43.:42:46.

to help. Excuse me, guys, you haven't got a minute have you?

:42:46.:42:49.

Excuse me? You haven't got a second? You haven't got a minute

:42:49.:42:54.

have you? Can you back me into here? Yes, no problem. I'm not very

:42:54.:43:00.

good at parking. It's my wife's car. Frightened to death of banging it!

:43:00.:43:07.

You think you would be able to get a bus in here! I will pull out a

:43:07.:43:13.

bit. His charm has worked. She is guiding him in. OK? He is making a

:43:13.:43:23.
:43:23.:43:23.

hash of it. A complete hash. Straighten up. Is this kind lady

:43:23.:43:28.

the only one who will help? Every single person he stops agrees to

:43:28.:43:36.

help him. 16 of them no less. And only one of them laughed at Harry's

:43:36.:43:39.

terrible parking. That is marvellous! But now for a bigger

:43:40.:43:45.

test. Stop! I want to see if anyone will go the whole hog and park the

:43:45.:43:50.

car for poor Harry. Can you drive? Yes. I don't want to take it.

:43:50.:43:55.

you sure? Honestly. No, she is shaking her head at that one. Will

:43:55.:44:00.

anyone get behind the wheel? Could you do it for me? No. You couldn't?

:44:00.:44:05.

No. Can you drive? I have to get back to work. She is shaking her

:44:05.:44:13.

head. Just when I was about to lose faith, bingo! Yeah. Jump out, I

:44:13.:44:19.

will get it in for you. Cheers, mate. Oh dear. Don't worry. It is a

:44:19.:44:24.

nightmare. She will kill me if I bang it! We have got it! He is not

:44:24.:44:34.
:44:34.:44:40.

You might have to Revitt, it keeps cutting out. Amazingly, eight out

:44:40.:44:48.

of the 16 people agreed to drive a complete stranger's car. One final

:44:48.:44:53.

test to see if anyone would go the extra mile. I will just get a

:44:53.:45:00.

ticket, hang on. Harry disappears in search of a parking ticket. Just

:45:00.:45:06.

watch it for me. She's getting out, wondering what has happened to

:45:07.:45:14.

Harry. Where has he gone now? most people, it is a step too far.

:45:14.:45:19.

He has wandered away. She doesn't want to wait. Can this be the end

:45:19.:45:25.

of the story? No, it is not, because four Good Samaritans don't

:45:26.:45:35.
:45:36.:45:36.

give up on Harry. Where do you get the ticket? Free parking. I'm not

:45:36.:45:43.

from round here. What made you stop? And nothing, he just seemed a

:45:43.:45:46.

bit nervous so there is nothing wrong with taking five minutes to

:45:46.:45:52.

help somebody. I generally always stop if somebody asks for my help.

:45:52.:45:56.

This has proved the spirit of goodwill is a live in Birmingham

:45:56.:46:01.

but right now I'm going to get a free lift back to the studio.

:46:01.:46:11.
:46:11.:46:17.

I have to say, it warms the cockles of my heart to think in this blame

:46:17.:46:23.

culture that people would have a go at parking the car. I am not sure

:46:23.:46:29.

where the cockles are! Just advising somebody to park a car,

:46:29.:46:33.

moving left and right, if you go in reverse left and right, and getting

:46:33.:46:37.

them to drive the car, it is magnificent. How many people would

:46:37.:46:44.

take the trouble. It was a terrific example of how far people are

:46:44.:46:49.

prepared to go. Eight people were prepared to do it. We wanted to

:46:49.:46:54.

persuade somebody not just to look after the car but a drive Harry

:46:54.:46:59.

home in his car but we couldn't get people to go that far. You are

:46:59.:47:05.

going out doing more of this, what are you pushing for? We are pushing

:47:05.:47:09.

what you might call the ultimate shopping experience. I don't go

:47:09.:47:13.

shopping much, but we are going to see how far we can push people to

:47:13.:47:18.

help other people shopping. We have been talking about getting a bus

:47:18.:47:23.

conductor on, would you pay extra on the offer to bring them back?

:47:23.:47:29.

would, because I am a cyclist, and I liked the bosses where you can

:47:29.:47:39.
:47:39.:47:43.

just hold on to the poll! Stanley Johnson! Rather surprisingly, one

:47:43.:47:48.

of the words that didn't feature large on our Word wall earlier was

:47:48.:47:53.

pot holes because one report estimate they could cause �320

:47:53.:47:58.

million of damage to our cars every year, but which is the worst one in

:47:58.:48:02.

Britain? Here are some of the candidates we have been tipped off

:48:02.:48:12.
:48:12.:48:40.

Some horrible ones in there. Every week we are going to be awarding a

:48:40.:48:46.

trophy, this week it is the worst part hole in Britain. Isn't that

:48:46.:48:53.

nice? We were going to award the trophy to this one on the A 20 in

:48:53.:48:57.

sorry, because it is the worst I have ever seen, but we thought

:48:57.:49:03.

about it and we have ruled it out because it has been repaired now.

:49:03.:49:12.

More of the trench! The winner of the worst pothole is this one in

:49:12.:49:17.

Bolton. In their defence, Bolton council said they have put in a new

:49:17.:49:25.

code of practice, and this one is due for repair. What about the

:49:25.:49:29.

other ones we have just seen? West Yorkshire council have said it will

:49:29.:49:39.
:49:39.:49:40.

be fixed on January 5th. Happy new year! Northamptonshire County

:49:40.:49:43.

Council says they prioritise longer-lasting repairs, and that

:49:43.:49:51.

has led to a 23% drop in reported defects. A lot of them blamed last

:49:51.:49:55.

year's cold winter. Next week we will be handing out the award for

:49:55.:49:58.

the worst road works in Britain and we are looking for nominations from

:49:58.:50:06.

you. Is your rode the most dug up in Britain? Have you got roadworks

:50:06.:50:16.
:50:16.:50:18.

but no road workers? Tell us where to send our cameras. Now it is time

:50:18.:50:23.

for the That's Britain news with the delightful Nick Knowles. Good

:50:23.:50:29.

evening. Here are the headlines - if you are taking a black cab to

:50:29.:50:33.

Oxford be careful what you say. CCTV cameras have been introduced

:50:33.:50:41.

to taxes. The council says it is to protect drivers in case of attack.

:50:41.:50:45.

We say we can't wait to see the taxi footage from all the Christmas

:50:45.:50:49.

parties. The North Wales council has spent

:50:50.:50:54.

�400,000 to put a carpet on a bridge used by horse riders, it is

:50:54.:50:57.

claimed it is to stop the horses being scared by the sound of their

:50:58.:51:03.

own hooves. The bridge is due to open in 12 days, it is already

:51:03.:51:08.

proving a hit with the horses but not so much with the locals who

:51:08.:51:12.

worry they will be saddled with the bill. That's why, when it was put

:51:12.:51:19.

to the vote, some of them voted neigh. Finally, a shopper in a

:51:19.:51:27.

Tyneside supermarket was almost band of do being told the limes

:51:27.:51:36.

were a dangerous weapon. The till raised an alarm, and the assistant

:51:36.:51:42.

said it was dangerous to buy more than one because the citrus could

:51:42.:51:52.

damage people's lives. She was then told it was part of an elaborate

:51:52.:52:00.

joke. The before we finished tonight, there has been a lot of

:52:00.:52:04.

complaining on the show, and that is what it is about, but we should

:52:04.:52:09.

also point out that Britain is a nation of unsung heroes. We don't

:52:09.:52:13.

even know they exist, but if they weren't there, the nation would

:52:13.:52:19.

fall apart. Meet the first of our hidden heroes. John Kirkwood runs

:52:19.:52:24.

the largest blood processing centre in the world. My job means a lot to

:52:24.:52:29.

me. I have been in the same job for 30 years because I really enjoy it.

:52:29.:52:33.

I enjoy the fact that this organisation makes a difference to

:52:33.:52:39.

people's lives, and gives me a real sense of achievement. At the NHS

:52:39.:52:42.

blood and transplant centre supplies blood to hospitals across

:52:42.:52:46.

the south every year. Half of Britain's hospitals rely on

:52:46.:52:51.

supplies from this centre. order that has just come in his

:52:51.:52:55.

from Cheltenham General Hospital, and it is due to be dispatched at 1

:52:55.:53:00.

o'clock so we have to get moving. John and his team make sure every

:53:00.:53:05.

drop of blood is screened so it is always safe. This will be

:53:05.:53:10.

transfused within the next few days and it gives a higher level of

:53:10.:53:16.

satisfaction to know you are helping to save lives. Here it is,

:53:16.:53:20.

ready to go. If you look at the clock, we are 10 minutes early. I

:53:20.:53:24.

don't think many people can say they do make a difference, but that

:53:24.:53:34.
:53:34.:53:34.

is what I like about the job. his dedication and others' that

:53:35.:53:41.

keeps people alive. You can also be a hidden hero, and donate blood

:53:41.:53:47.

yourself. Details of how to do that is on our website. Let's have a

:53:47.:53:53.

look at tonight's final wall, these are the things that have been

:53:53.:53:59.

bothering you the most. This is how it looked earlier. Dog poo, as

:53:59.:54:09.
:54:09.:54:11.

strikingly large! Junk mail, poor customer service... So, we can go

:54:11.:54:18.

through and see how it has changed. Thousands and thousands of people

:54:18.:54:25.

have been e-mail and, and a lot of it seems to be about dog poo, and

:54:25.:54:30.

now it is even bigger! Cold call us, that is something we haven't talked

:54:30.:54:36.

about. Slow drivers, bad driving, we will definitely be looking at

:54:36.:54:43.

that in the coming weeks. Fuel prices. Fireworks, and speed bumps.

:54:43.:54:48.

Some of these subjects we will take a lookout and bring report later in

:54:48.:54:52.

the series. You have been getting in touch with your stories. Do we

:54:52.:54:59.

have e-mails? One viewer says spitting is a horrible habit that

:54:59.:55:03.

seems to be spreading. People should face fines if caught. I

:55:04.:55:08.

agree with that. Bus conductors are a great idea but they need danger

:55:08.:55:14.

money these days as there is no respect anymore. Margaret is

:55:14.:55:18.

annoyed some councils recycle some plastics, others don't, it is

:55:18.:55:26.

unacceptable. Let the council's speak to each other to ensure

:55:26.:55:30.

recyclable things can be put in the bin. We asked do earlier if you

:55:30.:55:34.

would be prepared to stump up more money on your bus fare to bring

:55:35.:55:40.

back the bus conductor. The vote is in, and are we going to see a

:55:40.:55:49.

return of the bus conductor? Let's have a look. Look at that! 81% said

:55:49.:55:59.
:55:59.:55:59.

yes! Come on! I am really chuffed. I think that says a lot. Do you

:55:59.:56:04.

think it is the security? It is interesting your caller said they

:56:04.:56:10.

would need protection. A lot of the lack of respect came when they took

:56:10.:56:14.

away the uniformed jobs. If you bring them back, hopefully a new

:56:14.:56:19.

generation of children would learn to respect them. When you think how

:56:19.:56:22.

tight times are financially, even in this climate, people are saying

:56:22.:56:29.

they will pay an extra 25% to have that security. The most vulnerable

:56:29.:56:37.

people normally get their travel paid for, don't they? So, sorted.

:56:37.:56:43.

am really buoyed up by that. Thank you to everyone who voted. That is

:56:43.:56:53.
:56:53.:56:54.

a fantastic result. It must be your chubby cheeks. Shaun Williamson,

:56:54.:56:59.

the best bus conductor in the country! Sadly, that is the end of

:56:59.:57:08.

the show. Thank you to everyone for getting in touch. You can keep e-

:57:08.:57:18.

mailing for nominations for the worst roadworks. Thank you to Shaun

:57:18.:57:24.

That's Britain is a warm-hearted studio show about the things in modern life that drive us round the bend - from road works to hospital parking charges, and from littering to overcrowded trains. Presented by Nick Knowles and Julia Bradbury, the show reveals how Britain works and attempts to make life a little better for everyone in the UK - or at least have fun trying...

In this episode Grainne Seoige tackles junk mail, Ade Edmondson follows the journey a suitcase makes though the airport system, Shaun Williamson tries to bring back bus conductors and Stanley Johnson highlights the amazing public spirit of the British public with a hidden camera experiment. We also try to find the worst pothole in Britain and celebrate the hidden heroes doing the jobs that keep Britain ticking.