Episode 3 The Graham Norton Show

It's a week when we celebrate all things spooky. I'm going to make my

audience scream. I'm coming to get you. All right then. I will drink

your blood. Nothing? OK. Robbie Williams is on

The programme contains some strong CHEERING

You lovely people. Thank you very much. Thank you so much. You're

very kind. Tonight, chart topping singer, Robbie Williams is with us.

Yes, he is. Ballerina turned Strictly judge, Darcey Bussell is

gracing us. One of my favourite comedians Paul O'Grady is here.

And also, dropping in, hopefully not literally, the daredevil who

jumped from the edge of space, world record breaking skydiver,

Felix Baumgartner is here. I know! Did you see it? Did you all

watch it? It was incredible. He did a skydive from 24 miles up. So

brave. I mean I say brave, is that the right word? No. Probably stupid

would be a better word. Here he is about to jump. Yeah, OK on three,

one, two... Two and a bit, two and a bit more. It's so windy. Any way

it all ended well. I'm not saying he was nervous, but here he is

after they got him out of his space suit.

LAUGHTER Very excited that Robbie Williams

is on the show. Such a huge star! You know what I love about him,

he's always got time for his fans. He does. Take that. Robbie's been

performing all over Europe. Here he is on the Italian version of the X

Factor. Hello! How good does the Italian X Factor look, fantastic.

There Robbie gets to cuddle a sexy young lady. Ours? Louis Walsh.

All right, don't do a Tulisa. A huge welcome back to Paul O'Grady,

ladies and gentleman! APPLAUSE

Famous for his alter ego Lily Savage. I have to say not every man

looks good dressed as a woman, no. Hello boys! And hey, it's the first

time on the show for the wonderful Darcey Bussell, so pretty, now

Strictly judge, until recently one of the world's finest ballerinas.

There she is in action. So beautiful.

I wonder, is there ever a time when a tutu isn't sexy? Is there? Even

he's surprised to find himself in my monologue. She performed with

the world renowned Carlos Acosta. Hello! They both appeared in Swan

Lake where Darcy played the White Swan. There they are. Yeah, I

believe what he's doing there is taking her up the swany.

Let's get some guests on. Later, we'll meet Felix Baumgartner.

First, he's a comedian with a savage way. It's Paul O'Grady.

APPLAUSE Hello darling.

Lovely to see you. Have a seat. And from the Royal Ballet to the queen

of Strictly, it's Darcey Bussell! APPLAUSE

Wow! Look at you, gorgeous. Come in and have a seat. And yes, we will

let him entertain us, it's Robbie Williams!

# Let me entertain you # CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Have a seat.

# Let me entertain you # Sit, sit, sit.

That is a couch. That's proper. Yeah, I'm seeing chat, I'm liking

it. They put me in this pigging waist coat again. And it's making

me look unfortunate. So I'm going to have to undo it.

There we go. Happy now? Yeah. look good either way. Thank you

very much. Everyone looks lovely. You're all suited and booted. And

you have legs again. You forget behind the thing. Yeah, who knows

what I've got on. What's this yellow sample? Did you not ask for

that? I don't know. It's beer or is it cider? Oh, no, it's cider.

Lovely, I didn't know it was coming. Do you want that? Don't give me

cider, I'm such a lightweight these days. I whiff of the barmaid's

apron as I'm in trouble. Does it make awe gresive? No, I don't get

aggressive on drink, never. You get happy? Very happy, yeah. Then I

wake up in a skip with a kebab. Then I get aggressive.

Listen, congratulations, little Theodora? Yes. There she is. That

is so lovely. Yes. Can I just say, looking at that picture though, you

have slightly let the house work go. The house looks like a tip? Oh, you

actually mean the house and not the body? No. Can I just say Theodora

is a beautiful name, old classic name. Weren't people expecting you

to be more rock star? Storm. Yeah that kind of thing. Debris. Didn't

you have an incident with Gwyneth Paltrow's child? Yes unfortunately

I did. It was at my house in Los Angeles and the Coldplay boys had

been over for a game of football. Then I put on a spread afterwards.

There was a little buffet. Gawineth turned up. She's walking over and

in my head I'm saying, say something, say something. I said

"Does melon want some Apple? Easily done? Easily done. Paul, your

daughter is Sharon. You didn't want to call her Sharon due?

LAUGHTER No. Whose idea was it? Ti, wasn't

mine, believe you me. I wanted to call her gypsy Rose. She wasn't

having it. I was a big fan of Gypsy Rose Lee. I could hear myself

shouting her "Gypsy Rose, get in for your tea." I'm sorry, Apple,

calling a kid bloody apple. You might as well say King Edward or

celery for God sake. Granny smith Martin. Now that she's here and

you're holding her and everything, do you feel responsible, like a

proper grown up? Yeah and I love it. I really do love it. I was worried

that before she came, I've been a pop star since I was 16, I haven't

had to do anything for myself and now I'm going to be asked to guard

this life and take care of her. I was worried there would be no bond

and I would be a selfish person, but you know, you just melt. The

baby came out and everything changed cosmically, spiritually,

life, everything. It was just this moment of, wonder and from that

moment in, I'm in. I'm nappy changer, I'm chief burper, I'm

feeder. And she's a good little, she's an amazing little girl. And

every parent is going to say that about their daughters and sons and

stuff, but I'm a new parent, so I still have that euphoria and that,

she hasn't pissed me off yet. APPLAUSE

You know, you were very young when you started. Were you 17 when you

got 80,000 Valentine cards? I was 15 when I auditioned. 16 when I

joined. Then I was 17 when I got 74,000 Valentine's cards. What's

that going to do to a boy. It's mad. Yeah, I'm from a council estate in

Stoke-on-Trent. You're a guy at school one day. The next day the

police are cordoning off the road because there's too many girls

outside. My mum shut the curtains in 1990 and didn't open them again

until 1995. It was very, very strange, very, very wonderful and

very, very weird. We used to have this coach load of Germans that

used to pull up on a Thursday because they organised trips to

Take That's houses. They used to get out and pull up things from the

garden, flowers and stuff, jump over the back and nick me pants and

bits of fence would go. They would get on the bus and go off to Mark's

house. That happened every Thursday. Things were...

LAUGHTER That's incedsible. Yeah, things

were quiend mind blowing. Is it in Japan that you're like a rock star.

Yeah they treat me like Robbie Williams. It's really odd. They

come out of the stage door and they're going wah. You have

bodyguards to get to your car. I've never experienced that. Do they

give you lots of gifts? A lot of gifts. The last time we went when

my kids were really young. I think I had my youngest with me and she

has blonde curly hair and they're obsessed with blonde children. They

gave so many gifts, I got a life- sized well not life-sized but

Japanese doll with real hair and they're quite spooky. It came in an

amazing box. But really expensive.Ive mean extraordinary

gifts that you can't leave in the hotel. You have to take them home

with you. My kids really hate it. I put in a list of things that I

wanted. The first time with Take That it was customary to bring

gifts. It was amazing. You're impolite if you don't. I like

rollerblades and T-shirts and they brought them me. Do you know what I

get? Liquorice all sorts and black puddings.

I tell you something, Saturday morning, I think what's that smell?

I go down and there's a big Jiffy bag that's leaking. I open it and

there's two black pudding that were posted a fortnight ago.

I drop hints, you know. I say what I want. I was in Japan once and

this actually happened. I got into the lift and there were two fans in

there and they went "lobby". And I said, "Yes, please." That's not a

joke. That actually happened. APPLAUSE

With ballet fans, because it is very sexy in that you know, the men

and women are not wearing many clothes, but are fans too posh to

write pervy letters and things? no I have had quite a few pervy

letters. Sorry about that. I got your address and I thought.

sometimes used to get on the Tube after a show with my flowers and

everything and your fans would follow you on and sit beside you

and stuff. The only, I've only got weird shopping lists, kind of

sexual shopping lists? Do tell. very kinky. I've had weird ones.

Things they'd like to do with you or for... Yes. Perhaps not then.

let's not say. Oh, I see. Positions and things? No, the shopping list

of the food they'd like... To eat off you. That's very Japanese.

want to eat food off you? Buy a table, really! So they send a

letter to you telling you what they'd like to eat off you? Yes.

Was that one or a few? They'd give me the list of what they had bought

ready. They went out planning this. They went shopping for Darcy.

And then came and gave you the letter? Yes with the shopping list

going "I'm ready", that kind of thing. I'm here, come round and

I'll eat off you. Was there a black pudding mentioned?

LAUGHTER I wouldn't mind if there was.

Robbie Williams, you are in such a good place right now. You've had a

baby. You got married. You kissed and made up with Take That, great

tour. Now new album and song that is number one, isn't it? It's

number one on Sunday. It is. APPLAUSE

It's number one now. By Sunday that should be number one. The thing is,

because this is your solo album, but Gary Barlow he did work on it.

Yes, he did. Gary comes over to Los Angeles and he sets up in my attic

and we go up there and spend all day laughing about what we can and

cannot say on a record. Which is obvious if you list ton the lyrics

of Candy, none of them make sense. Yeah, we've written a ton of songs

together. Me and Gaz have done about 25, 30 songs. I'm saving some

for other projects and we have a good time. He comes over and we

have a laugh. I'm not making this up in a showbiz way, I'm so glad

that worked out, that you are still, you know because when you got back

together again, we were so excited. APPLAUSE

Everyone was so pleased, but then you thought, will there be a moment

when they're all in the recordling oo -- recording studio going - this

is why we don't work together again. No it wasn't him. It was that Mark

Owen. What a pain in the arse he is. No, he's a lovely guy too. We had

the most amazing time. We came back and wrote a critically acclaimed

album, commercially acclaimed album and.biggest tour the UK's ever seen

and we all became firm and very good friends. We vanquished the

demons in the past. You should be friends. Yeah a lot of stuff that

happened was when I was 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, your formative years. Gaz

was really young too. We were at each other and now we're not. We're

older blokes, more mature. He's a very, very, very decent man. I call

him the captain. I go to him for advice and stuff. I love him to

bits. I think he loves me too. think he does, yes.

APPLAUSE Everyone's happy. It's a happy

story. Later on, I'm guessing you're performing Candy due to the

paint work. Oh, yeah. The video, though, it's a

proper funny video. That picture of you with the old lady.

It's quite a shocking image. It is, isn't it. Yeah, they wanted know

kick a dog. I'm an animal lover. LAUGHTER

So, I was not having that. Then they said, punch a pensioner, I was

like, yeah, I'm in. Could you please address your

letters to "Robbie Williams", not us. Nothing to do with me. Must

mention you're back giging, three nights at the O2 from November

226789 that's a big deal. -- November 22. That's a big deal. You

get nervous, still? Not now. Not so much. Because I had to do something

about it. OK. All the way through the career - do you get nervous

before you do? I don't get nervous now? I'm pretty much the same.

There was a time I turned up to Milton Keynes and there was 60,000

people waiting for me and I was on the bus and I went "I'm not doing

it. Turn around." Seriously, I was like, I'm not going on. Turn around.

My manager, who's here today, "Robert, I know you're saying that

you can't do this, but I just thought I'd warn you that if you

don't, it will cost you �1 million." I was like

# Let me entertain you # Now, Darcey Bussell, we are loving

you on Saturday nights. This series of Strictly is so good. You've

arrived at a very good time. lucky. But I'm a bit disappointed

because you have a Catchphrase. It seems to have gone away already.

I didn't think about it and it disappeared. Yeah. Yah, OK. I know

why it was because when I coach dancers I'm always -- I always want

a response. You got it, yah, OK? I realised oh, no they're never going

to speak to me. Soy have to talk at them. I find that weird.

someone talk to you afterwards and go very good, but... No, I had such

a shock because I didn't appreciate I was saying it so many times until

they said, I think you should watch yourself. No really watch yourself.

Wow, I can't even hear it. It's so add. I've -- odd. I've never had to

open my mouth before. It was a south African yah. Yah, OK. In

terms of joining those three guys, is it like walking into a local pub,

the music stops, who's the new girl or are they nice? They're gorgeous

and very protective. Constantly, are you OK? Anything you need?

They're heaven. They've been doing it for nine years. The amount of

energy they have and passion for the show is fabulous. I feel like

I'm in very good company. It's a really high standard. Are you

watching? I've watched a couple yeah. Is there a rumour you're

going to be performing on it? yeah. I think. So I hope so. I have

an album out and I've done X Factor now. So there's only one left.

they asked you? They ring me every year. I like a lie in.

I am not getting up to be dragged around for eight hours a day. Like

a little Russian -- by a little Russian doing a strict tango and I

know what would happen. When I was, it takes me about three weeks to

learn a dance routine. Once it's there, it's there for life. If I

did this, you know in the eight hours a day for the week, I'd

forget everything. Everything would leave me. It is about the music. I

don't think you wo. Oh, I think it wo. You wouldn't want to stand

there and be insulted would you. I'd go for them. That's what I'm

saying. I couldn't take it. You're quite nice to them. I try and give

constructive. As they get better and better then you're going to get

bored if you give them the same correction every time. Like come on,

how many times I have told you this. Do you ever think, I'm going to be

vicious this week? I've got Craig next to me. I don't need to. He is

rubbing off on me. My marking is quite low. That's where I'm a bit

mean. That bitch. You've got some trained dancers and

people who can barely walk. I'd be in the latter category. Who's going

to win? Well, I have my favourites, obviously. I think we know who your

favourite is. They're not supposed to have favourites. But we noticed

this. Oh, no.

There's Louis. Look at her go. APPLAUSE

It wasn't then. I had some friends in the audience... Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We all know what that means. That's been done to me by builders. I've

got a shopping list for this. Did you do that in the ballet.

Middle of Swan Lake as you're dying. Would you go on the show? No.

you not, have you got Two Left Feet? I don't want to know that I'm

bad at it. I want to live in a lovely world where "I could do

that." You want to dance when you watch the show, don't you? No, I'm

quite happy sitting, drinking. Really? That doesn't mar my

enjoyment in any way. We mustn't forget your amazing career. This

book is still in the shops. that's just come out. There's

amazing pictures in here. Like, that's inhuman. How can a person do

that. There was no trampoline involved.

That's just you and the ground. did that ballet after I had my

second child as well. It was very challenging. You probably felt a

lot lighter. You didn't have stitches there, did you? Thank you.

Clearly an easy birth. That's incredible. This, I love

this picture. Capturing this moment... How long after birth was

that? Five months after. This, I mean, this is an incredible moment.

This is your last ever performance at the opera house. How long was

that standing ovation? It felt a long time. I was embarrassed

actually. It was eight or nine minutes of just people cheering.

was crying my eyes out. It was pathetic. It's nice that you got

the impact, like you didn't wake up the next morning and think, oh, my

God that was the last night. You got it that's was happening.

usually controlled on stage. I totally lost it. I could hardly

stand up. There is a quote from Christopher Wheldon, he said "What

makes a ballerina like Darcy, a ballerina has a fragrance that

lingers off they have left the stage. "I do smell good. We have a

picture of someone just checking on that fragrant. Oh, stop.

That's art. Now, Paul, we're going to talk

about your book. But we just have to talk about the new TV show, well

it's finished now, for the love of dogs. OK. That was... Aawwee.

were watching me playing. I went in every day and have a ball. I take

my Carmi ne out, the boxer I was in love with. This is you at Battersea.

Is it true you had it in your contract you didn't take a dog home.

Yes, I wanted it to be illegal to take a dog. I would be coming out

with puppies under me coat and all sorts. I thought, because I have

enough animals. I have three dogs any way. I thought I can't have

another one. I did fall at the final post. I got a puppy. So cute.

He's lovely, Eddie. He's a Jack-c hi. He's a chihuahua Jack Russell

cross. He's a cracking little fella. Heez as hard as nails you know.

Jack Russell's are. We have eight dogs. He'll see your four. I have

two. The Jack Russell, she's in charge of everybody. We have a wolf

as well. We have a wolf called Sid. The Jack Russell is a baby and runs

the house. He goes with the pigs. I have eight pigs. I have nine pigs.

Have you? I've got nine pigs. 12 pigs but I gave the other as way

and then one died. Oh, my evank lean, cost me a fortune. Honestly.

Is it true the thing that they all sleep in the bed? Yeah. It is

amazing you're a father. They all pile in the bed. They're all coming

over soon. Yeah, in the past, we have been known to actually have to

get out of our bed, leave the bed to the dogs and go into another

room to go to sleep. To go to sleep. Yeah. But there's been eight dogs

on and in and around the bed, yeah. Is it true the thing about building

the steps? We have doggy steps, yeah. Have you got them? No mine do

flying leaps. Six in the morning normally across me face. When they

get older and their hips start to go, have you not seen these doggy

steps? Listening, Robbie, I have already got a swing on the ceiling,

I can't have steps. No it's bad enough. I understand.

Dog fans, we have a little treat for you now. Because Paul he's not

the only writer here this evening. No, it's time too moat best selling

author and star of the Oscar winning film The Artist Uggie is

here with his book. There you go. Sit. Nice treats. How are you? Now,

watch this. Speak. There you go, baby. He's so good. I'm obsessed by

this. No, that's not speaking. Have one.

It's so cute. You can have a thing for doing nothing. Very good. I

believe you're a big fan of Darcey Bussell, are you? Yes? The

fragrance that lingers? Because, no he is. We have a picture of you in

Swan Lake. Haven't we? Yes, we do. Now Uggie, I'm not sure if you

caught that swan, but I know I have a picture taken by the paparazzi

after. I do, yeah. You've lost the weight, haven't you? You've been to

the Oscars and now you've written your autobiography. I'm not joking.

Uggie has written a book. And I have read it. It's a dog. He

doesn't know what I'm saying. So that's Uggie. He'll be appearing in

or tied up close to a leading book shop soon. Come down for a sec.

Come down, give me the book. Take it. Good boy. There you go.

Uggie, everybody! APPLAUSE

I want him. So cute. I hope he's in a safe dressing room, that's all I

can say. Under the coat. Seen him outside Tottenham Court Road tube

station tomorrow - sit. Sweet little dog. Isn't he lovely. It's

not just Uggie who's written an autobiography. Paul O'Grady has

managed to squeeze another volume. I was bored you see. Three volumes

of your life. Yes. This is it, you're up to date. I'll never be up

to date. It's a nightmare. You're more or less up to date. You kind

of cheat though. Yes. You get to 88 and just skip. About 200 years.

it because I mean obviously the books are all about you, but your

mother is such a major character throughout them and it's weird

because you adored her and she adored you. Don't know about that.

What's weird is that she never really knew about Lily. No, she

would have killed me I never told her. This huge thing in your life

and you never told her No. Wasn't there a moment when lily sold some

clothes? Yes we were destitute at the time. It was in the 80s. There

wasn't a lot of work around. All the mill towns and mining towns had

closed. I thought I would have to sell a load of drag. There was a

second hand clothes shop in Church Road in Birkenhead. There was

sequined evening gown and I got ten quid for them. My mother stopped

and said "Jesus, what kind of woman would wear stuff like that?" A big

woman, that's all I'm saying. have you managed to remember

everything? I just do. I have, there was a programme on Channel 4

about a kid who can remember everything. I can relate to him.

I'm the same. I can't remember last week. But I can remember 1970, 1980

vividly. That's why it's taken me three. I can't say then I did, then

I did that. I go into detail. What the dressing room was like and what

the strippers were like. remember that much? Vividly.

going to have to lie in mine. I've been to rehab twice. A lot of

memories have fallen out. You go on tour to these places several times

wouldn't you. Have you written your book yet? No. Are you going to?

have a memory of each photograph. That's a nice way of remembering

things, if you have a picture it's just like bang. Why don't you for

your book, why don't you talk to like your friends and get them to

tell stories about what they remember you doing. They were all

off their heads too. They don't remember anything.

it all together. The great thing about Lily is that she has a whole

life, this whole back story, families. A lot of people don't

know that Lily was in a convent for some time. Yes she was in a

carmelite order. It was St Philomena's of Wigan or the flesh

of St Philomena that was flogged off, I don't mean sold on eBay I

mean whipped off. How long was she there? Notd very long, three years.

That was the maximum. She was only allowed to say two words a year.

The first year mother superior says "Say your two words." She said

"Damp beds." The following year she's asked for the two words. She

says "Laosy food." The third year she says "I quit". And mother

superior said "Thank fuck for that, you've done nothing but moan since

you got here." APPLAUSE

The most ridiculous joke. A good joke.

Before Robbie sings for us, everyone on this couch tonight has

done extraordinary things but only Remove seat belt. Attaboy. That's

good. Stand up on the exterior step. Keep your head down. Release the

I'm going over. APPLAUSE

Yes, it's my final guest, the man who fell to earth, skydiver

extraordinaire, Felix Baumgartner. # It's raining men, hallelujah

# It's raining men # Have a seat there.

How are you? Well, back on the ground. And alive. That's the main

thing. Now the whole thing took about eight minutes, didn't it?

From when I stepped off I think I had four minutes and 20 seconds of

freefall and then four minutes on my parachute. During that time, are

you just hoping you aren't going to die? Are you thinking about it? Are

you able to go oh, look there's China? I was scared to miss the

planet honestly. I bet you were. Do you have time to think about stuff

while it's happening? Yeah. We have been practising for many years. We

had practice jumps from 70,000 feet, 90,000 feet. I never had a thought

I'm going to die. I only thought OK, I hope I break the speed of sound.

That's the faster than the speed of sound. So physically, when you

break the sound barrier, like does something happen? Do your ears pop,

what? What? Does something happen? I didn't feel anything. Are you

totally numb? No. I felt like he was going to combust or something.

Weren't you scared? There was a lot of talk about that, yah. The first

time they were explaining to me what was happen if something goes

wrong. You sit there and think, I don't want to know it, you know.

Because it's not funny. No, but also, here it is, it's great happen

yip ending, lovely, we're here. All going hue ray, that's fantastic.

But at what price? I mean your mum and your girlfriend, I mean, what

they must have gone through. Yeah, you have seen my mum. I know. She's

going through it. Crying and that. When that capsule took off she was

crying. Understandably. Does it not make you think twice about doing

it? I kind of feel bad to put my mum on that spot and my girlfriend

you know. But this is what I was doing the last couple of years.

This is what I've been working on so there's no way back. Was it

always a dream? Since I was a kid I had a big desire to fly like a bird.

What's your actual job? Skydiving. It wasn't like, oh, next Thursday

aisle Ogogo up in that balloon. won't be in on Thursday. You do

stunts all the time? Not stumps but I have been a professional jumper

for many years. I did base jumps from the highest buildings in the

world? Illegal jumps? Most of the time. Where was the most dangerous

jump that you've done in a town? The first was in 1997, the petronas

Twin Towers in Kuala Lumpur. I had to dress like a businessman

and fake some ID to get access to the building. And I put my parasuit

in a suit -- parachute into n a suitcase. I went out on a window

washer crane. It's all about the wind as well. If it's windy there's

no way to do it. Yeah right run, yeah. She knows a lot about this.

She's all over this. Any tips she's your woman. You wax that wind Felix.

That could kill you. I'll take you oult for dinner after and we'll

talk about wind. She has a fragrance that lingers, I'll tell

you. That But like that must be, that feeling

must be a very hard one to think, I'm never going to feel that again.,

No but you're going to want to do it again, aren't you? No. That's

it? You're happy. That's once in a lifetime. You don't want to go

higher? Is there another thing that you want to achieve that's similar?

Don't chance your luck, you've done it once. I'd say thank you, no more.

Every box has been ticked for you now? I think what I want to do in

the future is inspire the next generation because I've been

getting so many e-mails from e- mails from young kids and people

who told me thank you for doing this because we never had our own

moon landing and they say this has been like the moon landing now.

That's an honour for me. It's a great honour to meet you. If people

want to see the full story of the jump, Space Dive it's BBC Two this

Sunday at 8.30. It's a big thing which tells the whole story from

beginning to end. Thank you so much for coming to see us. Thank you.

Really amazing. APPLAUSE

OK. It's music time Robbie. If you want to get ready. Off he goes.

There he goes. Lovely.

CHEERING All right. So here he is performing

Candy from the new album Take the Crown, it is Robbie Williams.

# I was there to witness Cand ice is in the business

# She's got lots of different horses

# Lots of different men # I say liberate your sons and

daughters # You can give some when they give

# Nothing sacred # One, two, three, four, hey hoe,

here she goes # Either a little too high, or a

little too low, # Low self-esteem or a little too

low. She thinks she's made of candy. # Hay ho here she goes,

# Either a little too loud or a little too close

# Got a hurricane in the back of her throat

# And she thinks she's made of candy.

# Ring aring of roses, whoever gets the closest

# She comes and she goes as the war of the roses

# Mother as a victim # Father beat the system by moving

bricks to Brixton # Learning how to fix them

# Liberate your sons and daughters # The bush is high

# But in the whole there's water. # Hay ho, here she goes

# Either a little too loud or a little too close

# Got a hurricane in the back of her throat

# And she thinks she's made of # Liberate your sons and daughters

# The bush is high but in the hole there's water

# As you win, she'll be the Hollywood love

# And if you don't feel good, what are you doing it for?

# What are you doing it for? # Everybody, what are you doing it

for? # Doing it for

# What are you doing it for # What are you doing it for, what

are you doing it for. # Hey ho, here she goes,

# Either a little too high or a little too low

# Low self-esteem and vertigo # She thinks she's made of candy.

# Either a little too loud or a little too close

# Got a hurricane in the back of her throat

# And she thinks she's made of candy.

# Hey ho here she goes, low self- esteem and vertigo, she thinks

she's made of candy. # Here she goes.

# Either a little too loud or a little too close

# Got a hurricane in the back of her throat

# She thinks she's made of candy. # Robbie Williams everybody!

Beautiful. Come back. That was fantastic. Brilliant. Come

and sit down. Quick, have a seat. How catchy is that? That is nuts.

And it's number one. Right. What a great show. Ladies and gentleman,

sadly no time for red chairs tonight. A big thank you to my

guests, Paul O'Grady! Darcey Bussell! Felix Baumgartner! And