Episode 18 The Graham Norton Show

On the show tonight, one of Britain's favourite double acts.

-Being in a double act would be fun, wouldn't it, Graham?

-Yes, Graham, it would!

-Looking good, by the way.

-Thanks, right back at you.

LAUGHTER

-Just one thing, which of us would be the straight man?

-Oh...

Let's start the show!

APPLAUSE

CHEERING

Hello!

Hello, you! Hello, hello!

Hello, everybody. Hi, hi, hi!

Welcome all! We've got a great line-up for you tonight!

Entertainment superstars, Ant and Dec are here!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

I know!

Heart-throb star of The Fall, Jamie Dornan is on the show!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

From the global TV phenomenon Breaking Bad Aaron Paul is here!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Yeah!

Joining us later, the most super of all the models,

Naomi Campbell is on the show!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Yeah!

Plus, we've got music from the wonderful Ellie Goulding, everybody!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Yeah, yeah!

Ah, Naomi Campbell...

Very excited...still hugely in demand as a model.

Here she is at a Victoria Secret show.

-HE GASPS

-Oh, sexy, I know. She looks amazing!

But, you've got to be careful modelling lingerie

because you can get it wrong.

LAUGHTER

There must be a story there, somehow.

Yes, Ant and Dec have so much to chat about with Naomi

because they too are fashion icons.

Yeah...

LAUGHTER

That sort of look never goes out of style.

Yeah, cos it was never in style.

LAUGHTER

Also, big friends of Simon Cowell.

Yeah, in fact, they were even at the birth of Simon's baby.

LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

Ant and Dec are so successful,

they've won the National Television Award for Best Entertainment Presenters

13 times in a row, ladies and gentlemen! Yeah!

APPLAUSE

That's them winning this year.

You do wonder if the people who lose manage to keep a convincing

smile on their face.

LAUGHTER

Not really.

LAUGHTER

So pleased to welcome Aaron Paul to the show.

Aaron, of course, known to most people as

Jesse Pinkman in Breaking Bad.

All about a teacher who starts producing

and selling crystal meth, in order to support his family.

Now, they made the drugs in a kitchen, they did.

In the kitchen! And to be honest, I'd be worried about my dogs.

I would, you know.

I mean, I don't know, would you be able to tell

if your dog had inhaled crystal meth fumes?

LAUGHTER

Yes, you would.

Let's get some guests on!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Later, we'll be chatting to supermodel Naomi Campbell

and having music from Ellie Goulding...but first,

he's a genuine class A guest, it's Aaron Paul!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Wow! Hello, sir.

-Hi!

-It's so nice to meet you.

And you. Come in and sit down.

Aaron Paul!

You're going to fall for him, it's Jamie Dornan!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Hello, sir, nice to meet you.

Come in, sit down.

Jamie, Aaron, Aaron, Jamie.

And they're celebrities, get them out of here, it's Ant and Dec!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

How are you? How are you? OK, good.

Come in and sit down.

CHEERING

-Nice.

-I like that, lots of girls screaming and boys going,

-"Yeah, it's all right."

-LAUGHTER

It's a sausage fest tonight!

Oh, I tell you.

All right.

Naomi Campbell will be here later.

Yes, she will...well, I say she will, I'm sure she will.

She will be here! She will be here!

And by the way, I feel, if you want to mix it up, you don't

have to...do you always have to...or do you have to?

Oh, what, sit this way?

We kind of do cos if we don't, then people go,

"I saw you and you weren't sitting the right way around..." People remark on it, so we do it.

In restaurants and taxis, do you do it like this?

It ends up being like this, yeah.

Not consciously but we always end up sitting like this.

-Yeah, we do, yeah.

-We sat like this in the car on the way here.

We're like this in bed. I'm on this side...

LAUGHTER

You just get used to it.

Is that true that you do have a side of the bed. I mean, not with each other but...

LAUGHTER

Thinking about it...yeah.

-I sleep on my side.

-And I sleep on, yeah...

-On your side.

Yeah, yeah, I sleep on my side.

Oh, so in bed you're on the same side?

-No, no, in bed we're on...

-This side.

-Like this, exactly like this.

Oh, that's weird.

Aaron and I share a bed as well.

LAUGHTER

It's beautiful, it's beautiful.

Now, Jamie Dornan, I was expecting more of a beard.

-I'm working on it, yeah.

-LAUGHTER

You need to work harder, I think,

cos The Fall starts really soon, doesn't it?

I start filming next week but I've just come off something else,

so I have two weeks to grow a beard.

So, I'm...

HE GROANS

LAUGHTER

I've tried that and it doesn't work!

I have tried it.

Like Play-Doh hair.

LAUGHTER

And, Aaron Paul, I saw you last night at the screening

of Need For Speed but even there you could not resist

doing your Breaking Bad catch phrase.

It's true, you know, I'm just giving what people want.

LAUGHTER

-You know.

-Yeah.

I get called "bitch" every day.

LAUGHTER

All day long and so, you know, I just threw it out there.

And is it true the thing about people coming up

and asking you to say it to their wives and things?

Oh, yeah! I mean, a grandmother came up to me and she had to be pushing,

I mean, past 90 easily and she asked me to call her a bitch.

LAUGHTER

So, I did. I felt very...

LAUGHTER

I felt like I was doing something incredibly wrong but, erm...

-But it felt so right.

-But it felt so right.

LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

I would urge you not to say it when Naomi's here.

OK, no, I won't.

LAUGHTER

-It won't end well.

-No, no, no, no.

It won't end well, don't do it, don't do it.

Now, Ant and Dec, as you all know, back on our screens,

Saturday Night Takeaway.

-Mhm.

-And you're taking Takeaway on the road.

-Yeah.

-All around the UK. It's crazy, 33 dates.

Yeah, we're going all around the UK, taking it to arenas

and taking... Saturday Night Takeaway, for us,

is the show that people stop us on the street and go,

"Oh, I'd love to be in the audience for that."

So, we came up with the idea...

we can only fit a couple of hundred people in, why don't we take it to arenas.

Take it around the country, so anybody can come along, every show will be different.

Erm, we'll do hits on the audience,

get people to set each other up in the arena.

And we do all the elements that are in the show,

so we'll do Ant versus Dec and stuff, so it's

basically like coming to watch the TV show but an arena version.

Now, the thing is, you're Ant and Dec now, you're huge stars.

LAUGHTER

You know what I mean.

I'm sensing, in this tour there might be a helicopter.

You know, it'll be very nice.

It'll be better than when we used to tour

when we were in the music business, yeah, yeah.

-It won't be Travelodges and...

-Ginsters pasties.

-Yeah, there were a lot of pasties, wasn't there?

-A lot of pasties.

Jamie, do you remember PJ and Duncan?

I wasn't...I was doing that face with the Ginsters...it

wasn't like PJ and Duncan.

LAUGHTER

Let's not talk about all that.

I forgot they were PJ and Duncan. I'm sorry I said yes now.

LAUGHTER

-They were a pop duo, Aaron.

-That's fantastic!

Don't concern yourself with it too much.

-I want to hear some stuff.

-No, you wouldn't.

-No, you won't.

LAUGHTER

Goodness, gracious!

-That is beautiful.

-Oh, God, that hair!

That hair is amazing.

-I think it's amazing.

-There can't have been a stylist involved!

LAUGHTER

That must be - hair, model's own.

I remember, at the time, going back to Newcastle and me mam going, "Your hair looks stupid!

"What you playing at?" And I was thinking, "Oh, she doesn't know."

And now you look at that picture...Mam, you were right all along, I'm sorry.

It looks like the same hair as the girl from Aqua, remember Aqua?

-Oh, yes.

-And Barbie Girl, remember her?

-Yes, yes.

She had that exact horrible hair.

Wow, what a very uncool reference, Jamie.

LAUGHTER

AARON: I appreciated it.

APPLAUSE

Yes, he's now looking for allies, "You remember them, right?"

LAUGHTER

It wasn't Aqua, it wasn't Aqua, it was some other one.

-"Some indie-punk thing, yeah."

-LAUGHTER

"I got confused."

Anyway, it's all behind you now cos Takeaway's going from strength to strength.

And continues at seven o'clock on Saturday.

-And you're doing your undercover things again.

-Yeah.

-I think we've got a clip from tomorrow night's show.

-Oh, great.

-Brilliant.

-And this is the two of you with Gordon Ramsay.

It doesn't need any other set-up, does it?

Well, yeah, just disguised as handymen...inept handymen.

To, kind of, ruin his day on the set of MasterChef US.

Buenos dias, Senor Ramsay.

Yeah, can we just open the door, please, bud.

Have you seen my son?

Yes, he's in here.

-Ah, I need the key to the van for a tool.

-Oh, this is a joke!

Will you ask my son for the key to the van.

Yeah, here you go.

-Are these the keys to the van?

-Don't...mate, I don't know.

Could you speak to my son?

-Yeah.

-Yes, please.

-This is crazy! Young man?

-Hello.

-What are you doing in there?

Erm...

LAUGHTER

I've got a pretty bad stomach.

You've got a bad stomach?

I think I have food poisoning.

Oh, man!

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

So, we basically, we've locked him in his...he's on his lunch hour,

we've locked him in his dressing room, from the outside

and I'm locked in his toilet,

doing a doo.

And he can't get out, so there's somebody, me,

in his bathroom, he can't get out, erm, and then, eventually,

we have to kind of axe the door down and he, I mean,

the bleepometor, the bleep machine goes into overdrive.

LAUGHTER

The whole clip is still with the lawyers now, so we need to work

out how many bleeps we can show on tomorrow night's show.

-He loses it completely.

-Oh, OK.

It's brilliant!

LAUGHTER

You always give good prizes on the show.

But, Aaron Paul, you must be so bored of this.

My advice to you is to buy this footage,

so it never gets seen again. Cos, have you seen it? You must have seen this footage umpteen times!

What, what footage? LAUGHTER

-Oh, you do know.

-Oh, I think I know what you're talking about.

Yeah, get ready if you haven't seen it because it's fascinating.

Well, we haven't seen it. I'm sure it's been shown a lot in the States.

I hadn't seen it before.

-Right, this is a very young Aaron Paul...

-Yeah.

-..on The Price is Right.

-Some of my finest work, my finest.

This is real, this is real.

Who's our next player? See what we can do for Aaron Sturtevant.

Come on down!

Aaron, you're the next contestant on The Price is Right!

Wait for it, wait for it!

CHEERING

Look at the CBS bumper sticker on my back.

You're the man, Bob!

You're the man!

Amazing!

APPLAUSE

Thank you, thank you.

-I'm going to finish my drink now.

-We know you're a very good actor.

I mean, were you...you can't have been that excited?

Erm, you know what? That was actually a full blown character.

I was honestly, I was on six or seven cans of Red Bull.

I mean, it looks like I was on some serious drugs there

but it was just Red Bull.

Erm, I could not sit still but I knew they wanted,

I knew they would pick people with high energy and they interview you

before you get into the audience and so, I was out of my mind...clearly!

LAUGHTER

-Erm, and yeah, so they picked me.

-And that's him being picked.

Here he is, will he win something? Here we go!

An elegant flattop desk.

CHEERING

Aaron, what do you bid on that?

HE SCREAMS: 1,200 bucks!

Actual retail price, 1797!

CHEERING

Did you get the desk?

APPLAUSE

-You got the desk?

-They gave me the desk.

-They gave me the desk.

-And was that it? You got a flattop desk?

Erm, that's actually all I won on the show.

LAUGHTER

And that thing was so unbelievably heavy!

LAUGHTER

Yeah, it's pretty exciting.

Now, Jamie Dornan, you're here to talk about your new Channel 4 show.

Before we get to that, we just want to quickly mention,

cos you've been in many of the papers, erm, 50 Shades of Grey.

Now, when is that...it comes out next year?

CHEERING

See, already, they're whooping and cheering!

Those three bums on seats up there.

Is that going to change your life?

I've no idea, no idea.

It's very hard to imagine or prepare...

But the buzz about it is, you know, you must have noticed,

there's a lot of interest in that movie?

Yeah...I mean, look, we're in a very powerful position,

like, 90 plus million people have read the book,

so you know, if a third of that....a hundredth of those people,

that's successful if they see the film.

So, it's a nice position to be in

but I've no idea what it's going to do.

-It's out next year?

-It's out on Valentine's Day next year, yeah.

LAUGHTER

-Yeah.

-Oh, yeah...

-That's perfect.

Can you imagine, "Oh, you're a 50 Shades of Grey baby."

LAUGHTER

When were you born? Oh...

LAUGHTER

I get it.

The weird thing is, in terms of changing your life,

it did change your life physically?

Did it? Yes, it did, I know what you mean, yes.

It isn't as creepy as it sounds.

LAUGHTER

Erm, yeah, OK, right.

So, look...bascially, I have always had a complex with the way I walk.

Erm, and I've always been told,

throughout every point of my life, that I've...not always been

told that I've got a bad walk but somebody's commented on my walk.

It's always been like, "Oh, right, that's the way you walk?"

LAUGHTER

That's how you walk, OK.

Is that you walking?

From school, also...

LAUGHTER

-FROM THE AUDIENCE:

-Show us your walk!

Back off.

We might go there, we might go there.

Erm, yeah, so I remember a mate of mine

at school said cos I've...this won't happen

but I've quite pronounced calf muscles, erm,

I always thought it was a hereditary thing but I remember my mate,

once we were talking about it...we didn't just sit around and talk about that all day.

LAUGHTER

-You've got beautiful calves, Jamie!

-Oh, amazing!

We have great nights just staring at them, drinking.

Erm, and he said, "You know why you have big calves?"

I said, "No, I think it's cos my dad does, it's hereditary."

He said, "No, no, it's cos you walk on your tiptoes."

So, I was like, is that a weird thing?

Anyway, a couple of jobs I've done,

the first day that we did The Fall and I had to walk

and the director, the producer, writer, Allan Cubitt came up

and said, "Is that a character thing or..."

LAUGHTER

"..or is that your walk?"

I was like, "Uh-oh." I could try and be clever my way out of it

but then I thought, that is how I walk.

So, we started working on things

and he started talking about why don't you, maybe, take longer strides.

LAUGHTER

Erm, honestly, so then my wife and I would walk around where we live in

London and cos I'm on my tiptoes

I'm quite high, I'm quite bouncy.

So, my wife said, "Why don't you try leaning back?"

Right, honestly, so I'm literally walking...we'd go out for walks,

erm, and I'd literally...I'll show you my old walk, right.

Here's the old walk.

Oh, I'm so excited!

Don't get that excited.

LAUGHTER

This is my old walk. I'm so out of sync now.

I'll do it, this is my old walk.

Right...and this is the walk we tried, right, with my wife.

LAUGHTER

Remember those commercials for Mr Soft?

LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

And then...this is what we settled on

and I'll tell you how we got there.

Oh, shit, I can't...

LAUGHTER

Then my new one, you'll see my new one, it's fine.

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

How did you get to the new one?

OK, so, how I got there was I have to dance...just a little

bit of dancing in 50 Shades of Grey and I can't dance at all.

They asked me if I can dance and I was like,

-"Yeah, I dance all the time..."

-LAUGHTER

I can't dance.

So, I had dance lessons and it was like foxtrot

and it was very classic.

The dance teacher, I was really struggling with it

and the dance teacher said, "You know what you need to do.

"Just think about it as walking." I was like, "Oh, dear!"

LAUGHTER

I was like, "I'm 31 years old, literally,

"the first thing you do in life is to walk."

I was like, "It's funny, I'm not a great walker."

LAUGHTER

An he said, "Just think when you walk, heel-to-toe, heel-to-toe."

And I was like, "Heel-to-toe?"

LAUGHTER

No-one ever told me that!

LAUGHTER

I literally went toe to more toe!

LAUGHTER

I didn't know.

So, now I just apply that every day when I'm walking around.

APPLAUSE

Yeah, thank you.

So, now tell us, in your latest TV drama on Channel 4,

New Worlds, will this be the last outing of your old walk?

LAUGHTER

OK, so what's brilliant about this is I pretty much run everywhere.

LAUGHTER

-Oh!

-I've got a decent run.

-Is that you running?

-I've got a decent run.

-Oh, that's running?

-Yeah.

LAUGHTER

If I run...I try to run as much as I can...

LAUGHTER

I'm like, "Why don't we try this scene with me sprinting around?"

It's like, when you're really sad in the scene and I'm like,

-"I'll just sprint over there."

-LAUGHTER

-And then I cry.

-Does that mean you're early for everything?

But New Worlds is on Channel 4, when does it start?

I think, sometime towards the end of March.

Towards the end of March and it's, sort of,

a sequel to The Devil's Whore, is that right?

Yeah, they're a bit reluctant to call it a sequel to Devil's Whore

but you've already done that, so...

LAUGHTER

I will go with that. I see it as a sequel to Devil's Whore, which I loved!

OK, and it's a world...it's got, new world refers to America,

-settlers in America.

-Yeah.

But also the change of order in Britain, as well.

Yeah, it's like butchering the Native Indians in America and

that side and making, you know, a new world, a new England over there.

Then, on my story, I play a character called Abe Goff,

who is in England and the similar situation in England where

they're trying to get the tyrannical rule of Charles II

off the throne and Devil's Whore is about Charles I

and his beheading and leading up to that.

This picks it up, I think, 30 years later

and I'm trying to rally support to fight against Charles II.

-Well, you're very convincing. This scene is you...

-Hope so!

Well, no, actually, I hope so cos you are wearing a big face mask.

So, I'm pretty sure it's you.

It's that one, good, cheers.

It literally could be anyone.

LAUGHTER

It's your eyes.

-OK, yeah.

-It's your eyes, they shine through.

-Yeah, yeah.

-LAUGHTER

It's definitely his walk.

He does walk in the beginning.

LAUGHTER

This is the old walk.

It's the old walk. This is Jamie Dornan doing his old walk.

We're so excited!

LAUGHTER

New Worlds, here we go.

# What do we fear?

# The day is ours... #

Your mistake, sir. The day is ours and so must your jewels be.

-What?

-You shall not touch her.

Step aside.

Do you know who I am?

Yes, I do. How dare you do this!

We do it not for ourselves.

It is your birthday, you shall keep your gems.

And now...

will you cut my throat?

APPLAUSE

Oh, stirring stuff!

-Now, Aaron Paul, you're here with a brand-new movie!

-Yeah!

A big wired for sound movie.

Erm, Need for Speed...and it must be nice for you to be in this

and inhabit a new world because,

how many years did Breaking Bad go on for, in filming terms?

Erm, in filming terms, from pilot to end, it was just under seven years.

So, you know, I was playing a character for a very long time,

who was just so unbelievably tortured and lonely and sad

and it was nice to jump from that to...it was incredibly fun to do

but it was nice to just jump into something that was just

a little bit lighter and fun.

Cos people watch Breaking Bad in a very modern way.

I mean, people did watch it as it went out.

-Right.

-But equally, people have been watching it on Netflix,

box sets, so you must constantly meet people

who are in a different bit of your journey.

Yeah, I meet people on a daily basis that are just now starting the show.

We had a solid core audience from the very beginning,

but it was very small, but they were very passionate,

and that's really why the show stayed on the air.

And people are obsessed by it as well and they really love it.

Yeah, they're obsessed by it. You know what?

It's strange because there's such incredible television coming

out of the UK,

but the UK was really one of the only places on the planet that

Breaking Bad never really found its home, and I didn't really

understand that, but now finally people are catching on.

But also, people are gorging themselves on it,

-because it's all there. Cos where...?

-You've just started.

Yeah, I'm just like, 3 eps in on the first season.

I haven't watched any and I apologise,

but the only reason is, when it first started, we've got

a friend and he said, "You've got to watch this,

"it's the greatest television show I've ever seen."

And just to piss him off, I didn't watch it.

The thing is, we get that all the time. No, I refuse!

And now I kind of feel like I'm left out of a party that everyone's enjoying.

-You're the same, aren't you, Jamie?

-What?

No, I was laughing at what Ant said. We have a friend and then didn't...

Just like, they have one friend...

We do, we don't need any more than that.

I had the exact same thing where I was so sick of people talking about

the finale of Breaking Bad and we had never seen it, my wife and I,

and then we watched it.

I just told you, I've got four episodes to go of the whole thing.

-Ooh!

-We watched it all over Christmas, um...

We had a really exciting Christmas.

-It was a very heavy, intense Christmas.

-Family-friendly Christmas.

And actually, what's great, the finale really doesn't disappoint it.

-It ends in such a beautiful, great way.

-La, la, la!

Nothing, nothing from me.

But, I suppose, in having that character for that many years,

-you know, it is a dark place to be.

-Yeah.

Was it hard for Aaron Paul to live like that?

Yeah, the first couple of seasons, I kind of just lived and breathed

Jesse Pinkman, kind of 24/7, and I learned from Brian Cranston who

played Walter White, he said, "It's OK to leave that character on set."

Cos, Jamie Dornan, you did kind of a similar thing with The Fall

playing a sexy... All day we've been saying sexy serial killer, it's such a... Why is that...?

You know, he plays the sexy serial killer.

The hot one you wouldn't mind.

Don't kill me yet!

Sorry, but it must be, you know, I read you in interviews

saying how on set it gets pretty bad.

Yeah, I mean, it's a brutal headspace to maintain.

I don't think it's healthy.

Look, I mean, Jesus, we did five hours in the first series,

he did seven years, so it's a slightly different thing,

but I made a point of getting out of that headspace when I could

and trying to get out of character when I could,

because you just don't want to take it home.

I didn't want to take it home. Maybe you would want to take it home...

You definitely don't want to take it home, sorry.

You DEFINITELY don't want to take it home.

But I heard you used to apologise to the actresses after you'd

-done horrible things to them.

-Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, man, you've literally got some poor, very lovely,

very naked actress, um...

And you're literally doing the creepiest things imaginable.

-And getting paid for it.

-And getting paid for it, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. So...

See, I take my work home with me, but he's called Dec,

and he only lives four doors away, so...

Well, listen, the Need For Speed, it opens on the 12th of March and it's

based on a... Cos I'm so clueless, is it a video game, computer game?

-Is that the same thing?

-Yeah, it's based on a video game.

They've made, I think, 18 of them.

-Yeah, 18 video games.

-Wow!

And when I first saw the script,

Need For Speed, I was very hesitant to even read the script if I was

to be honest, but once I started reading it, I loved the story.

It's such a fun, honest thrill ride

and the fact that our director wanted to do

the entire film without CGI or green screen was incredibly brave.

He wanted to do a throwback to films that really kind of started

the genre, such as Bullitt and Vanishing Point and those titles.

There's references to those movies in the movie.

-Yeah, throughout the entire thing, yeah.

-Listen, we've got a clip.

This is you in action with Imogen Poots.

Does it need more set-up than that, or...?

Um, no, it's actually my character's trying to scare her

out of the car cos I just don't want her to be there,

so, yeah, that's pretty much it.

TYRES SCREECH

HORN BLARES

-You see the bus, right?

-What's that?

The bus!

HORN BLARES

The bus, the bus, the bus!

Go two, now.

TYRES SCREECH

Looks like a scene out of Speed down there. Hard left at three, Keanu.

-OVER PHONE:

-Ha ha ha, my man! You got the skills, boy. You know you bad!

Know you bad.

I love that at the end.

It's a little too late for that.

After all that, "Well, I'm going to put my seat belt on now.

"He's clearly crazy."

Ladies and Gentlemen, I hear the pitter-patter of beautiful feet.

She approaches, she is nigh, she is the most successful

supermodel the world has ever seen.

Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Naomi Campbell.

Oh, wow!

Wow! You look amazing!

Sit down, sit down.

Jamie, Aaron, Naomi. Sit down there.

Supermodel, meet boys. Boys, meet supermodel.

ALL: Hi!

I feel like it's a really good edition of Blind Date.

Question number one...

-By the way, congratulations. I was at the NTA this year.

-Oh, thank you.

-Thank you very much.

-That was fun to see all the soaps.

I was in heaven.

-Yeah, it was an amazing night.

-And it's your 13th.

-13, yeah.

-Excuse us, Graham.

-Yeah, it was a great night.

-One of the best nights of my life.

-Were you there, Graham?

-Was he there?

-We beat him.

Aw, Graham!

Naomi, that was cold.

You look fabulous! Just amazing. Wonderful!

-Thank you for being here.

-Thank you. Thanks for having me.

So, a model, now a TV mogul, but you are still doing the catwalk.

Was it last week you were in Milan?

-On Sunday. On Sunday, I did the catwalk.

-And look at you there!

-Cowgirl.

-Cowgirl, yeah.

Cos you took a big gap, didn't you, from catwalk?

And then you sort of came back.

No, it's not really a gap, I just work for...

-I can't say what I really want to say now. I just, I just...

-Say it, go on.

-Say it!

-No! I just work for the desi...my friends.

-Oh, you work for people you like.

-Yeah, and I do, like, one per season.

-OK.

-One per season, opposed to when I used to do, like, 30 shows in Milan.

Oh, my God! The airmiles!

And I do feel for the girls now that do...

like, you know, the shoes are tough.

-Really tough.

-You never did catwalk, did you?

I know, it's a stupid question.

I just thought I'd ask.

Just thought I'd ask.

In terms of fashion,

I know you want to mention the Vogue Festival at the end of March.

Yeah, I'm going to speak at the Vogue Festival.

-And tickets for that are online?

-They're online, yeah.

Now, really, we must talk about The Face, cos there's been a

-lot of press around it, and I know you've seen some of this press.

-Oh, yeah.

-And it's annoyed you.

-It really has.

In fairness, there's a thing in the New York Daily News.

They've gone all out on it, ladies and gentlemen, all out!

-Now, they're claiming it all comes from show insiders.

-Yeah.

So, according to this, and I'm only reading it cos it's here,

-"She's taping her face skin back."

-Yeah.

"And hiding the evidence with her fabulous wigs."

What does that even mean?

Well, basically, they've seen tape in my make-up room,

-so they assume that I'm taping my face.

-What does that even mean?

-Never.

-What is taping your face?

-I'm going to tell you a secret, hold on.

-OK, OK.

The secret is everyone thinks I've had big boobs for many years,

and have always said, "Oh, we thought they were bigger,"

when they met me in person. I'm like, "No, they're not."

Because I tape them. Am I taped now? Yes. That's my secret.

So, instead of them saying, you know, instead of them saying,

"Well, maybe...I'm taping my face." I'm not that old.

You don't know how hard that was for four boys not to go like that...

-We've all done it.

-No, mustn't. Mustn't. Mustn't.

We've all done a Jennifer Lopez. We've all done it. We all do it.

We do it...

I mean, it's like, you know, I don't want to fall out on your show

and I don't want to embarrass myself, so I tape my boobs.

OK, that I understand, just.

If somebody tapes their face, what do they do?

I have no idea, cos I've never taped my face.

-Who tapes their face?

-To their boobs!

That sounds like something off your show.

It says, "You've banned staffers greeting you until you say hi first."

-Crap.

-OK. That's crap.

Do you...

OK, when I'm on set as a model, as an executive producer,

as a mentor, I don't speak.

I still work with photographers now that I worked with

since I was 16, 28 years. We can talk all day long.

For me, in order to have that boundary, cos we've got work to do, I

don't speak until lunchtime or break time when we're off camera, you know.

I understand, that's very professional, all I would say

is if you came on set and went, "Hiya," then you wouldn't get this.

I say hello to everybody.

Listen, I'm nice to my sound guy, my lighting guy,

because I know they can mess me up totally.

-So, you know...

-What's the story?

Cos there's a whole big thing in here about the judges

-in the first series...

-Yes.

-..Coco and Carolina...

-Yes.

-They're not back.

-Nothing to do with me.

-OK.

-Nothing to do with me.

-It says here it's all to do with you.

-No.

LAUGHTER

We will change, each season, new mentors.

I've met you several times over the years

and you're always lovely, you're always really friendly and charming,

but you are still...

You missed one part out, the part of...

that they say I'm a diva.

And they said that I do my own make-up,

but I can tell you, a real diva would never do her own make-up.

So...that part is also ridiculous.

APPLAUSE

I'm not going to go to work... At six in the morning I'm like this...

and just be like, "Do my make-up..." No way.

-I'm half dead in the morning.

-So...

-I'm not a morning person.

-So you don't do it or you do do it?

-I do not do it.

-I do not.

-I do not touch this face.

How dare you even suggest it!

I've got great make-up artists and great friends, like family,

that I love and I trust to sit in a chair.

All I was going to say was, whenever I meet you,

you are very friendly and nice.

But at the time same, there is a kind of intimidating...

But that's on you. That's not on me.

It's coming from you though.

LAUGHTER

That's coming from you. You feel...

-I'm just a girl from South London...

-Maybe that's it.

LAUGHTER

I'm exactly the same.

That's just it. It's what you think I'm going to be like.

-How...? When you meet men...

-Yes. I have this question all the time.

Are they intimated by you? How would a man impress you?

There's four men there.

The ones who are intimidated by me I'm never going to know.

I love that.

I'll never know them and our paths will never pass.

But what impresses you when you meet a man?

It's... I don't know. They have to have a great sense of humour.

They can't take themselves too seriously.

-Yeah.

-LAUGHTER

Tick. Tick.

Life is too short and I want to have fun.

In fairness, in terms of impressing a lady...

Aaron Paul on the end,

you did something fabulous to impress your wife.

-I think you did it to impress your wife.

-What did I do?

The thing with cherries.

Oh, God! You want to see it?

-I've got some cherries.

-Oh, God.

-Have I?

-There's some. There's some.

-No... OK.

-Come on.

-OK, let's do it.

-Can you do it?

-Yeah.

-Do it with the pineapple.

-LAUGHTER

Whatever it is.

You want to do this with me? It's just...

-Is it hard to do or easy?

-It's just... I don't know.

I never felt it was hard to do. It's just tying a stem...

with your tongue.

That sounds difficult. I think you'll be impressed, Naomi.

Well, well, I...

LAUGHTER

Oh, no.

-AUDIENCE MEMBER:

-Woo!

-Oh, my... It's a knot!

-You can see the... Yeah.

-Wow!

Thank you. APPLAUSE

-It's so impressive, yeah!

-It is.

-Yeah.

My wife was quite excited about that. LAUGHTER

I don't know why, but, yeah. GRAHAM LAUGHS

-Now tie the banana.

-LAUGHTER

Thank you very much to Naomi and all my guests.

It's time for music.

This woman has just won a Brit Award for Best British Female.

Performing Goodness Gracious, please welcome Ellie Goulding.

APPLAUSE

# I lost a signal and put you away

# Swore upon my sun I'd save you for a rainy day

# Loosened the noose then let go of the rope

# I know if it's never coming back it has to go

# I keep calling your name

# I keep calling your name

-# I wanna hold you close

-But I never wanna feel ashamed

# So I keep calling at night

# I keep calling at night

-# I wanna hold you close

-I just never wanna hold you tight

# Goodness gracious I can't seem to stop

# Calling you up

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms

# I can't seem to stop

# Calling you up

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms

# I found the weakness and put it to play

# Swore upon the stars I'd keep you till the night was day

# Shake my head dizzy so I'll never know

# You said if you're never coming back you have to go

# I keep calling your name

# Keep calling your name

# I wanna hold you close

# But I never wanna feel ashamed

# So I keep calling at night

# I keep calling at night

# I wanna hold you close

# I just never wanna hold you tight

# Goodness gracious I can't seem to stop

# Calling you up

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms

# I can't seem to stop

# Calling you up

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms

# Woah

-# Calling you up

-Just to keep crawling to your...

# Oh, my goodness, here I go again

# Pulling you back to me

# Pulling you back into my arms so selfishly

# I don't think I understand

# Cos I don't really know myself

# I keep calling you up

# Calling you up

# Calling you up

# Calling you up

# Calling you up

# So I can go

# Goodness gracious I can't seem to stop

# Calling you up

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms

# I can't seem to stop

# Calling you up

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms

# Calling you up just to keep crawling to your arms. #

APPLAUSE

Ellie Goulding, everybody!

Beautiful!

Come and join us. Oh, lovely, lovely, lovely.

Ellie Goulding!

-Beautiful job, my dear.

-Thank you.

You sit there beside Aaron. Is there room for everyone?

ALL TALK OVER EACH OTHER

All scrunch down. All scrunch down. Very, very, very good.

And that is the single. That is out now on the album Halcyon Days,

-which is also out now.

-Yes.

-And listen, congratulations on the Brit Awards.

-Thank you.

-I mean, that was a big deal.

-It was.

I didn't really think I was going to win.

I genuinely... I know people say that, but I didn't prepare anything.

And I was really, really nervous. I was shaking.

Prince...presented it.

I know. That's like a prize in itself.

I didn't even know about that, and then he was there and...

Yeah. It was all very...scary, but...very, very cool.

Can I just say? It's so nice to have a Brit winner on the couch

because all evening we've just been looking at Brit nominees.

LAUGHTER

Oh, dear.

APPLAUSE

What...?

-When was it? '95?

-'95.

-And what were you nominated for?

-Best Newcomer.

And... And this is good. Who won?

HE LAUGHS Oasis.

LAUGHTER

-Oh, God! It was very close.

-Whatever happened to them?

Very close.

-LAUGHTER

-It was awful.

Before we go tonight,

let's see if we can squeeze in a story on the red chair.

Who is there?

-Hello.

-Hi, Graham.

-What's your name?

-Eleanor.

Lovely. And what do you do, Eleanor?

-I'm retired.

-Ooh, right.

-What did you do?

-I was a local government officer.

You've retired now. Just own it with pride. No-one knows what you did.

You could be responsible for the fortnightly bin collection

but we don't know.

You know, you're retired now.

You got off. You got away with it. Er... OK.

Off you go. Off you go with your story.

Summer, 1959, August, it's boiling hot. I'm seven months' pregnant.

I'm wearing a very diaphanous dress.

What? What?

-Diaphanous. Floaty.

-I thought it was a design.

And...because it was so hot and I was at home,

I didn't wear any knickers.

-Anyway...

-Leave it. Leave it. LAUGHTER

Leave it. Leave it.

APPLAUSE

-Do you want me to carry on?

-Carry on. Carry on. Carry on.

Then what happened?

During the afternoon I had a terrible thirst

and I needed to have lemonade, so off I toddled to the local shop,

bought two great big bottles of lemonade, one under each arm.

I'm toddling home, happy,

and a gust of wind blew up and my dress came right up over my face...

front and back. Commando!

APPLAUSE

ALL TALK OVER EACH OTHER

-Yay!

-ALL TALK OVER EACH OTHER

Jamie was really impressed by that walk. He was like, "Wow!

"Look at her go."

Well done, everyone.

If you'd like to join us on the show and have a go in the red chair,

you can contact us via our website at this address.

Thank you so much to my guests tonight.

-Ellie Goulding!

-APPLAUSE

-Aaron Paul!

-APPLAUSE

-Jamie Dornan!

-APPLAUSE

-Ant and Dec!

-APPLAUSE

-And Naomi Campbell!

-APPLAUSE

We're taking a short break, but we will be back on the fourth of April

with screen siren Cameron Diaz, Oscar-winning actor Russell Crowe,

and queen of the disco Kylie Minogue.

I'll see you then. Good night, everybody. Bye-bye!