Matt Johnson: Iselder a fi

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-I booked a last-minute trip -in December 2009.	0:00:03	0:00:09
-A cheap flight to Spain -where my parents have a flat.	0:00:10	0:00:14
-I wanted to go somewhere - -to escape.	0:00:15	0:00:19
-To everyone around me, -my life was perfect.	0:00:23	0:00:27
-But to me, it wasn't.	0:00:28	0:00:31
-Inside...	0:00:33	0:00:34
-Inside, I was numb.	0:00:36	0:00:37
-When Matt shared what he did on that -awful day in Spain on the balcony...	0:00:42	0:00:47
-..it was completely -unbelievable to me...	0:00:47	0:00:53
-..that someone -could reach such a place.	0:00:53	0:00:56
-I was in a very dark place.	0:00:57	0:01:00
-It felt -like everything was against me...	0:01:00	0:01:04
-..and the world -would be better without me.	0:01:04	0:01:08
-When we learnt we were -to interview Matt on This Morning...	0:01:10	0:01:13
-..about his mental illness, -his depression...	0:01:14	0:01:17
-..I knew nothing about it.	0:01:17	0:01:18
-I felt...	0:01:18	0:01:20
-I felt I had let him down, -because I had no idea.	0:01:20	0:01:23
-At the time, -that dark time in Matt's life...	0:01:25	0:01:28
-..we were best friends -and spent a lot of time together.	0:01:28	0:01:31
-We talked about everything, -and I'm angry with myself...	0:01:31	0:01:35
-..for not realizing that it was -as serious as depression.	0:01:35	0:01:40
-Matt Johnson is a familiar face -throughout Britain...	0:01:55	0:01:58
-..who's presented -some of our most popular programmes.	0:01:59	0:02:02
-As well as being a stalwart of -the ITV daily show This Morning...	0:02:02	0:02:07
-..Matt's also been one of the faces -of S4C's Welsh learners programming.	0:02:07	0:02:12
-The warm and likeable character from -Caerphilly is loved by thousands.	0:02:12	0:02:17
-A night out in Cardiff with Matt -can be nuts.	0:02:18	0:02:20
-There's no other way to describe it.	0:02:21	0:02:23
-Matt is a person who loves music -and has played in bands.	0:02:23	0:02:28
-He likes a laugh.	0:02:28	0:02:31
-He's a naughty boy!	0:02:32	0:02:33
-Everyone knows him, -everyone wants selfies...	0:02:35	0:02:38
-..and you realize -that Matt is a celebrity.	0:02:39	0:02:42
-The thing about Matt is -everybody likes Matt.	0:02:46	0:02:49
-The only thing I ever thought -looking at Matt Johnson...	0:02:49	0:02:52
-..was jealousy!	0:02:52	0:02:53
-I would just look at him and say...	0:02:54	0:02:56
-.."It's not right that one -human being should look so well...	0:02:56	0:03:01
-"..be so upbeat, nice and friendly -and be so good at their job."	0:03:01	0:03:06
-I had no idea -what he was going through.	0:03:08	0:03:11
-None of us would have known.	0:03:11	0:03:14
-Cheers, boss!	0:03:15	0:03:16
-Just like old times!	0:03:16	0:03:18
-It took me a while to speak honestly -about how I was feeling.	0:03:28	0:03:34
-To someone who gets paid every day -to talk...	0:03:36	0:03:39
-..that's completely nuts!	0:03:40	0:03:42
-But talking about your feelings -is different.	0:03:44	0:03:48
-That was very hard...	0:03:49	0:03:50
-..although it was probably -the best thing I ever did.	0:03:51	0:03:54
-What was going on in my head -at the time...	0:03:57	0:03:59
-..is something -that's difficult to explain.	0:03:59	0:04:02
-I'm this happy guy -from Caerphilly...	0:04:02	0:04:04
-..with a lovely family, -with great friends.	0:04:05	0:04:07
-I was kind of sad -and I didn't know why.	0:04:08	0:04:10
-The reason why I didn't reach out -or speak to anybody...	0:04:11	0:04:14
-..was because I didn't know -what was going on myself.	0:04:15	0:04:18
-I was annoyed with myself -like most people are sometimes...	0:04:18	0:04:22
-..when you see somebody -with depression.	0:04:22	0:04:24
-You think, snap out of it. -Everything's wonderful.	0:04:25	0:04:28
-1 in 4 of us will suffer -a mental illness at some point...	0:04:29	0:04:32
-..with depression -being the most common.	0:04:32	0:04:35
-Depression -is a collection of symptoms.	0:04:35	0:04:38
-One of the main symptoms -is feeling low in spirit.	0:04:38	0:04:42
-Other symptoms are a lack of energy, -lack of interest in things...	0:04:42	0:04:48
-..and in young people specifically, -we often find irritability.	0:04:48	0:04:53
-Other obvious symptoms are -lack of sleep, eating problems...	0:04:54	0:04:59
-..concentration problems...	0:04:59	0:05:01
-..and in extreme cases -we worry if people...	0:05:01	0:05:05
-..have the feeling of wanting to -self-harm and not wanting to exist.	0:05:05	0:05:10
-It was ten years ago.	0:05:13	0:05:15
-People just didn't talk -about depression then.	0:05:17	0:05:21
-It wasn't the done thing at all.	0:05:23	0:05:25
-No media discussion, no campaigns.	0:05:25	0:05:28
-Maybe if there were things -out there...	0:05:28	0:05:32
-..to make people -more aware of mental health...	0:05:32	0:05:36
-..I would have sought help.	0:05:36	0:05:39
-Hindsight, though, -is a wonderful thing.	0:05:40	0:05:43
-At school in Caerphilly...	0:05:46	0:05:47
-..Matt was as comfortable on -the rugby pitch as he was on stage.	0:05:48	0:05:52
-It soon became apparent that -he wanted to work in television.	0:05:53	0:05:57
-After leaving school...	0:05:57	0:05:59
-..he started working as a runner -on Welsh drama series.	0:05:59	0:06:02
-I knew I wanted to work -in entertainment...	0:06:03	0:06:07
-..as an actor and singer.	0:06:07	0:06:09
-I'd fallen in love -with the TV world.	0:06:09	0:06:14
-I know it sounds corny but it was -great to step into the Welsh world.	0:06:16	0:06:21
-It was my first experience -of Welsh culture.	0:06:22	0:06:26
-What's Welsh culture in Welsh?	0:06:26	0:06:29
-Diwylliant Cymraeg.	0:06:30	0:06:31
-Diwylliant Cymraeg.	0:06:31	0:06:33
-Diwylliant Cymraeg.	0:06:33	0:06:35
-In 2004, -he joined Welsh boy band Max-N.	0:06:43	0:06:47
-He got a taste of fame, -performing in front of thousands...	0:06:47	0:06:52
-..in places like Wembley Arena -with Girls Aloud.	0:06:52	0:06:55
-I felt as though -I was part of something special.	0:06:56	0:06:59
-We were rock stars.	0:07:00	0:07:01
-"Rock stars".	0:07:02	0:07:03
-# Every colour sparkling	0:07:05	0:07:07
-# Walking down the street #	0:07:07	0:07:10
-I'd never partied like this before - -drink, drink, drink.	0:07:11	0:07:15
-Two gigs a night, -travelling everywhere.	0:07:15	0:07:18
-Burning the candle at both ends -for sure.	0:07:18	0:07:21
-# Give me faith, feelings of despair	0:07:23	0:07:26
-# Nothing valuable comes easy #	0:07:27	0:07:29
-After two years, the band split, and -finding work in television was hard.	0:07:31	0:07:37
-During this period, -Matt started drinking heavily.	0:07:38	0:07:41
-It felt like a little game.	0:07:45	0:07:46
-I couldn't drive at the time...	0:07:46	0:07:48
-..so I didn't have any problems -with drink driving.	0:07:49	0:07:52
-I was getting taxis and buses.	0:07:52	0:07:54
-I was hiding -how hungover I was most days.	0:07:54	0:07:56
-I was getting pretty good at that.	0:07:57	0:07:59
-That was the little bit of control -that I had.	0:07:59	0:08:02
-Looking back, knowing -what I know now about Matt...	0:08:02	0:08:05
-..maybe the signs were there...	0:08:06	0:08:08
-..maybe drinking a little too much, -like everyone in their 20s.	0:08:08	0:08:12
-Maybe this was a way -to hide any pain he had...	0:08:12	0:08:15
-..or a way -of taking the attention away...	0:08:15	0:08:18
-..from those things in his mind -that worried him.	0:08:18	0:08:21
-I don't know. It's hard to say.	0:08:21	0:08:23
-There was an element of -self-sabotage starting to come in.	0:08:30	0:08:35
-I was drinking too much...	0:08:35	0:08:37
-..trying to hide my feelings -with alcohol.	0:08:38	0:08:42
-I collapsed in Ammanford -after a night on the pop...	0:08:48	0:08:52
-..and fractured my cheekbone, -my nose and my jaw.	0:08:52	0:08:57
-A complete mess.	0:08:57	0:08:59
-The rollercoaster and fun -came to an end straight away.	0:09:04	0:09:07
-This was the first time -I didn't feel superhuman.	0:09:08	0:09:13
-I am not superhuman.	0:09:13	0:09:14
-I could get injuries -like everyone else...	0:09:15	0:09:18
-..and...	0:09:19	0:09:20
-..and I felt scared -for the first time, ever.	0:09:20	0:09:25
-I couldn't get out of bed.	0:09:29	0:09:32
-I didn't want to speak to anyone.	0:09:32	0:09:35
-I was stuttering...	0:09:36	0:09:37
-..when I was trying to speak -to somebody for some reason.	0:09:37	0:09:41
-I pretty much -wanted to curl up in a little ball.	0:09:41	0:09:45
-Into a ball.	0:09:45	0:09:47
-I hated myself.	0:09:49	0:09:50
-I didn't have any money.	0:09:51	0:09:52
-I just had small jobs like -working in a pub and coffee shops.	0:09:53	0:09:59
-This affected -my relationship at the time.	0:09:59	0:10:03
-I just felt guilt, guilty.	0:10:06	0:10:10
-I felt I was letting myself down...	0:10:10	0:10:14
-..and letting her down as well.	0:10:14	0:10:16
-In the summer of 2009, -Matt's six-year relationship...	0:10:19	0:10:22
-..with TV presenter Alex Jones -came to an end.	0:10:22	0:10:25
-The drinking continued, he was -thousands of pounds in debt...	0:10:26	0:10:30
-..and the depression took hold.	0:10:30	0:10:33
-A few days before Christmas 2009...	0:10:39	0:10:41
-..he decided to escape -to his parents' apartment in Spain.	0:10:41	0:10:45
-I got there - the worst rain -I've ever seen in Spain.	0:10:52	0:10:56
-The TV wasn't working etc.	0:10:56	0:10:58
-I went to the local pub, -the local karaoke bar.	0:11:00	0:11:03
-The measures in Spain -are pretty bad anyway...	0:11:03	0:11:06
-..but I got absolutely annihilated -and I don't know how I got home.	0:11:06	0:11:11
-I drank a bottle of whisky...	0:11:15	0:11:18
-..went out to the balcony...	0:11:19	0:11:22
-..and thought everyone -would be better off if I jumped.	0:11:23	0:11:28
-I couldn't believe -he'd reached such a dark place.	0:11:32	0:11:35
-I felt for him.	0:11:38	0:11:39
-I remember him saying -he didn't have any options.	0:11:43	0:11:48
-The only way out of this hole -was to jump from the balcony.	0:11:48	0:11:54
-For someone to reach that point, -something was obviously very wrong.	0:11:55	0:12:01
-I'd run out of ideas.	0:12:03	0:12:06
-I felt like I had no other option.	0:12:07	0:12:10
-I couldn't bear the thought of four -years or more of feeling sad...	0:12:10	0:12:15
-..and no way out...	0:12:16	0:12:17
-..and not liking who I was.	0:12:19	0:12:21
-It's hard to put yourself -in that position...	0:12:23	0:12:26
-..where someone's at such a low ebb, -there's no hope.	0:12:26	0:12:29
-That's despite -having a fantastic family...	0:12:31	0:12:34
-..and Matt has a great family.	0:12:34	0:12:36
-And good friends, obviously.	0:12:36	0:12:39
-Seriously, -Matt has a special group of friends.	0:12:39	0:12:42
-It's hard to believe that wasn't -enough for him at the time.	0:12:42	0:12:48
-I just can't imagine - -that's what's difficult.	0:12:49	0:12:51
-I can't identify with that.	0:12:52	0:12:53
-You must be in an awful place -to think like that.	0:12:53	0:12:56
-Then I cried...	0:13:00	0:13:02
-..because I knew -I wasn't going to do it.	0:13:03	0:13:07
-That feeling of numbness.	0:13:09	0:13:12
-That feeling...	0:13:13	0:13:14
-..of internal resentment, -pain and anger towards yourself.	0:13:14	0:13:20
-For that to be released, -I felt it straight away...	0:13:20	0:13:24
-..the outpouring was incredible.	0:13:25	0:13:27
-I could not believe -how lucky I was...	0:13:28	0:13:32
-..because so many people out there -do commit suicide.	0:13:32	0:13:36
-They get to that point.	0:13:36	0:13:37
-I can't imagine -what that point's like.	0:13:38	0:13:40
-I was there, -and that was bad enough.	0:13:40	0:13:43
-That part there, I dread to think -what that must be like.	0:13:43	0:13:49
-Unbelievable.	0:13:49	0:13:50
-The next day, Matt travelled home -to spend Christmas with his family.	0:13:54	0:13:59
-.	0:14:03	0:14:03
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-Subtitles - -Subtitles	0:14:04	0:14:06
-I came home on Christmas Eve...	0:14:09	0:14:11
-..with a massive hangover, -obviously.	0:14:13	0:14:16
-I also had a sense of euphoria...	0:14:16	0:14:18
-..this weird adrenaline.	0:14:20	0:14:21
-Knowing that I wanted to live life -and get better felt amazing.	0:14:22	0:14:27
-It felt like the tunnel was opening -slightly. That's not a lie.	0:14:27	0:14:31
-It felt like -it was getting lighter.	0:14:32	0:14:34
-That was the first time in a very -long time I was aware of things.	0:14:36	0:14:40
-I was...	0:14:41	0:14:42
-I was present in that moment.	0:14:43	0:14:45
-In the new year, I decided -to run the London Marathon...	0:14:49	0:14:54
-..to give myself focus.	0:14:55	0:14:57
-I'd started to be more sociable.	0:14:57	0:15:01
-I felt -I was having my best sleep ever.	0:15:01	0:15:06
-Like I was...	0:15:08	0:15:10
-Like I had just been hatched -after a well-rested 30,000 years!	0:15:11	0:15:16
-Soon after, -Matt appeared on Cariad@Iaith...	0:15:16	0:15:20
-..S4C's new Welsh learners series.	0:15:20	0:15:23
-It was a chance for him -to polish his Welsh.	0:15:24	0:15:26
-Would you like a Welsh cake?	0:15:26	0:15:27
-Would you like a Welsh cake? - -I'm fine, thanks.	0:15:27	0:15:29
-What's your phone number?	0:15:29	0:15:31
-But behind the smile, he was still -suffering bouts of depression.	0:15:34	0:15:38
-A time came -when things got a bit better.	0:15:39	0:15:43
-Work was going well.	0:15:44	0:15:45
-My personal and financial situation -was getting better.	0:15:46	0:15:51
-But I still felt the same inside...	0:15:51	0:15:56
-..sad and tired.	0:15:56	0:15:58
-I just couldn't shake that cloud.	0:15:58	0:16:01
-I worked with Matt for a while, -but back and forth over time.	0:16:04	0:16:09
-We always had fun. We'd pull each -other's leg and have a real laugh.	0:16:09	0:16:13
-But then there were times, -I sensed...	0:16:13	0:16:16
-I sensed a kind of heaviness.	0:16:16	0:16:19
-Sadness is the word, maybe.	0:16:19	0:16:22
-Something wasn't quite right.	0:16:22	0:16:24
-It's hard when someone's doing a job -of work presenting a programme...	0:16:25	0:16:29
-..so we're happy and jolly...	0:16:29	0:16:31
-..but then, -in the periods in between...	0:16:31	0:16:34
-..we'd grab ten minutes -where I would ask if he was OK.	0:16:34	0:16:37
-Good evening and welcome -to the final of Cariad@Iaith.	0:16:38	0:16:41
-TV presenting is the best job -to have for me personally...	0:16:42	0:16:45
-..so I can hide -however I'm feeling.	0:16:46	0:16:48
-You're in charge a little bit.	0:16:48	0:16:50
-You're supposed to project a -magnified version of your happiness.	0:16:50	0:16:54
-It's the perfect cover.	0:16:55	0:16:56
-I remember one time -having a coffee with you...	0:16:56	0:17:00
-..and I think -I was in such a state of anxiety.	0:17:01	0:17:04
-I'd been drinking, I think, -for four weeks solid.	0:17:04	0:17:08
-You just very calmly and easily -said, "Be kind to yourself."	0:17:08	0:17:12
-It really stuck with me.	0:17:12	0:17:14
-It's stayed with me.	0:17:14	0:17:16
-It really -had a massive effect on me.	0:17:16	0:17:19
-Something simple but so important.	0:17:19	0:17:22
-It's interesting to hear Matt say...	0:17:23	0:17:25
-..that anything I've said -has ever helped him in any way...	0:17:26	0:17:30
-..because, -I just think I was a friend.	0:17:31	0:17:33
-I was worried about him.	0:17:34	0:17:36
-But maybe people are reluctant...	0:17:37	0:17:39
-..to ask that simple question - -are you OK?	0:17:39	0:17:42
-Men are 6 times less likely -than women...	0:17:46	0:17:50
-..to seek help -for their suicidal thoughts.	0:17:50	0:17:53
-Dealing with his depression -was a long process for Matt.	0:17:57	0:18:00
-The first difficult step...	0:18:00	0:18:02
-..was to learn to speak openly -about his feelings.	0:18:02	0:18:05
-I lived in Cardiff. -My parents were in Caerphilly.	0:18:06	0:18:09
-I probably saw them -four times a year.	0:18:09	0:18:12
-If you've been on a bender -for three months...	0:18:13	0:18:16
-..the last thing you want -is your mam coming round...	0:18:16	0:18:19
-..clacking through bottles -and seeing her son on the sofa.	0:18:20	0:18:23
-I pushed them away. Definitely.	0:18:24	0:18:26
-At the time, -I really wish I'd spoken to my dad.	0:18:26	0:18:29
-I really, really wish, -because he would have understood.	0:18:29	0:18:33
-My father's -been through things in the past...	0:18:33	0:18:36
-..so he could probably relate -to a few things I was going through.	0:18:36	0:18:40
-He's a very good listener -and a really good talker.	0:18:41	0:18:44
-He's a smart guy.	0:18:45	0:18:46
-So three years after -my really bad time...	0:18:46	0:18:49
-..is when we first -started to talk about it.	0:18:49	0:18:52
-Matt's father Gary -was an undercover detective.	0:18:52	0:18:57
-For over 20 years, -he has suffered with depression.	0:18:57	0:19:00
-It's an illness he kept a secret...	0:19:02	0:19:05
-..and which finally -brought his career to an end.	0:19:05	0:19:08
-This is the first time he's -spoken openly about his experiences.	0:19:10	0:19:14
-I started suffering when I was in a -red-blooded job in the police force.	0:19:16	0:19:21
-The roles I was involved in -were things like the drugs squad.	0:19:21	0:19:27
-They were men's men, -big, strong men doing a hard job.	0:19:27	0:19:31
-I was in a dark place, I know I was. -I didn't want to go to work.	0:19:31	0:19:35
-I actually lied -because of the stigma attached.	0:19:35	0:19:38
-I told the police force -I had a bad back.	0:19:38	0:19:41
-I was not going to talk -or admit that to the world then.	0:19:41	0:19:45
-In fact, I've never ever -talked about it publicly.	0:19:45	0:19:48
-You are the most...	0:19:48	0:19:50
-I talked to you because of the -bond we've got with mental health.	0:19:50	0:19:55
-I was suffering, and still am.	0:19:55	0:19:59
-A lot of facts have come out...	0:19:59	0:20:02
-..through -talking to members of the family...	0:20:03	0:20:05
-..and to find out tragic stories...	0:20:06	0:20:08
-..particularly -my grandmother's side of the family.	0:20:08	0:20:11
-My father went for a walk -with an uncle...	0:20:12	0:20:14
-..for miles -up a disused railway line.	0:20:14	0:20:17
-He was told, -"You can go home now, son."	0:20:17	0:20:19
-He said, "Are you coming with me?"	0:20:19	0:20:22
-"No, you go. Run along now. -Go home." He did.	0:20:22	0:20:25
-He later find out -that his uncle had hung himself.	0:20:25	0:20:28
-That's the sort of thing -my dad dealt with.	0:20:28	0:20:31
-He kept it all inside.	0:20:32	0:20:33
-He suppressed it all terribly, -didn't he?	0:20:33	0:20:36
-He hid behind the newspaper.	0:20:36	0:20:37
-He hid behind the newspaper. - -Terrible.	0:20:37	0:20:39
-He wasn't able to communicate with -men either. With you, me or Adam.	0:20:39	0:20:44
-He was a very tough guy -and that was his downfall.	0:20:44	0:20:48
-His conversations -were limited to rugby.	0:20:48	0:20:51
-The things -that were common to his audience.	0:20:51	0:20:54
-Kept them at arm's length.	0:20:54	0:20:56
-Many a time when I took your mother -back when we were courting...	0:20:56	0:21:00
-..he'd put up the paper, -and, yes, he appeared ignorant...	0:21:00	0:21:03
-..but he was screening everything.	0:21:04	0:21:04
-..but he was screening everything. - -He was hiding.	0:21:04	0:21:06
-My dad said at one stage, -"You're feeling sorry for yourself.	0:21:06	0:21:09
-"And if you're a man, -you can shake it off.	0:21:10	0:21:12
-"You haven't got a cut -to put a plaster on.	0:21:12	0:21:15
-"You haven't got a broken leg -to put a cast on.	0:21:15	0:21:18
-"You are invisibly suffering."	0:21:18	0:21:21
-Talking to my dad then -was just unbelievable.	0:21:24	0:21:27
-That's the first time -he's really talked in detail...	0:21:27	0:21:30
-..and so well about his mental -illness and how he's lived with it.	0:21:30	0:21:34
-His own family tree and how -he thinks it's part of his DNA...	0:21:36	0:21:39
-..because of his great-grandmother - -she committed suicide.	0:21:40	0:21:44
-His grandmother's brother -committed suicide.	0:21:44	0:21:47
-I didn't know that.	0:21:47	0:21:48
-This is all news to me. -Brand-new stuff.	0:21:48	0:21:51
-I've been absolutely blown away -today by his bravery...	0:21:51	0:21:55
-..and been shocked -by his stubbornness.	0:21:55	0:21:59
-It's opened my mind...	0:22:00	0:22:01
-..to get into the mind of somebody -that works in that world...	0:22:02	0:22:05
-..a police officer, somebody -that's tough, a joker, a lad.	0:22:06	0:22:09
-There's millions of them down there.	0:22:09	0:22:11
-The Valleys -are full of people like that.	0:22:12	0:22:14
-By 2030, the World Health -Organization predicts...	0:22:18	0:22:21
-..that more people in the world...	0:22:21	0:22:23
-..will be suffering from depression -than any other illness.	0:22:23	0:22:27
-In 2010, Matt, who was starting to -learn to live with his depression...	0:22:27	0:22:32
-..got a job as a presenter -on ITV's This Morning show...	0:22:32	0:22:36
-..his first big break.	0:22:36	0:22:38
-I was finally doing -what I wanted to do.	0:22:38	0:22:41
-I was having such a laugh.	0:22:41	0:22:43
-The whole team -was getting on really well.	0:22:44	0:22:47
-I was making the most -out of living in the city.	0:22:49	0:22:53
-I was going out nearly every night.	0:22:53	0:22:56
-The only drawback to the job -was having to get up early.	0:22:56	0:23:00
-One part of his illness -that has worried him daily...	0:23:07	0:23:10
-..is his battle with sleep.	0:23:10	0:23:12
-During the darkest time...	0:23:16	0:23:18
-..I pretty much had insomnia -for three to four months...	0:23:18	0:23:21
-..which really messes -with your brain.	0:23:22	0:23:24
-I used to drink a lot.	0:23:28	0:23:29
-That's the only way -I could get to sleep.	0:23:30	0:23:32
-National Centre for Mental Health	0:23:37	0:23:41
-The National Centre -for Mental Health in Cardiff...	0:23:41	0:23:45
-..are using a special watch...	0:23:45	0:23:47
-..to research into the link between -lack of sleep and depression.	0:23:48	0:23:52
-To control his sleeping problems, -Matt's taking part in the research.	0:23:52	0:23:56
-How accurate are these watches?	0:23:58	0:24:00
-I'll put it on while you explain.	0:24:00	0:24:02
-I'll put it on while you explain. - -They can be quite accurate.	0:24:02	0:24:04
-You'll also be doing a mood diary -as well as a sleep diary.	0:24:04	0:24:08
-We'll then be able to look at -what you've said in those diaries...	0:24:08	0:24:12
-..what the watch has said...	0:24:12	0:24:14
-..and if there are any relationships -between your sleep and mood.	0:24:14	0:24:18
-The watch might make me anxious! -The watch is spying on me!	0:24:18	0:24:22
-I'll do what I can -for this to work...	0:24:22	0:24:25
-..and for you to find out -whatever you need to find out.	0:24:25	0:24:28
-The watch can't measure how deep -Matt's sleep is or its quality.	0:24:30	0:24:35
-For that, he'll have to wear -a special cap for one night...	0:24:35	0:24:38
-..to measure his brain activity.	0:24:39	0:24:41
-The cap will show how long Matt -spends in the four stages of sleep.	0:24:43	0:24:49
-Specifically, -the length of his deep sleep...	0:24:49	0:24:52
-..the most important stage -for a healthy mind and body.	0:24:53	0:24:57
-The results could have a huge impact -on Matt's way of life.	0:24:59	0:25:04
-Excuse me! Goodnight!	0:25:05	0:25:07
-.	0:25:13	0:25:13
-Subtitles	0:25:17	0:25:17
-Subtitles - -Subtitles	0:25:17	0:25:19
-Over the last few years...	0:25:22	0:25:24
-..Matt's found a way -of living with his depression.	0:25:24	0:25:28
-A series of small steps such as -keeping fit and eating healthily.	0:25:29	0:25:34
-To him, -these small steps are crucial...	0:25:34	0:25:37
-..to ensure -he keeps his mind healthy.	0:25:37	0:25:40
-I have to force myself to slow down.	0:25:42	0:25:45
-To switch off the phone, -just be in the moment.	0:25:46	0:25:49
-I've got to do these little things.	0:25:50	0:25:52
-One topic that's quite often raised -talking to Matt...	0:25:54	0:25:57
-..is the techniques he uses -to cope with his mental health.	0:25:57	0:26:01
-He knows all the tricks!	0:26:01	0:26:02
-They sound so simple.	0:26:03	0:26:04
-Keeping fit, -going for a run or a jog.	0:26:04	0:26:07
-Doing that -releases chemicals in the body...	0:26:07	0:26:09
-..that makes a person feel better.	0:26:10	0:26:12
-They are things -that everyone can do...	0:26:12	0:26:15
-..to try to keep the dark clouds, -or those low points, at bay.	0:26:15	0:26:19
-Matt's come back -to see researcher Katie Lewis.	0:26:24	0:26:27
-He hopes -that the sleep test results...	0:26:27	0:26:29
-..will provide another way -of dealing with his depression.	0:26:29	0:26:33
-I see from your sleep patterns -that your sleep's quite erratic.	0:26:33	0:26:37
-You're going to sleep -at different times of the day...	0:26:37	0:26:41
-..usually very late - -three, five or six in the morning.	0:26:41	0:26:45
-The problem -with your erratic sleep pattern...	0:26:46	0:26:48
-..is that -you're giving yourself jet lag.	0:26:49	0:26:51
-You're telling your body clock -it's shift time zones.	0:26:52	0:26:56
-When you are sleeping, -the quality isn't very good.	0:26:56	0:27:00
-You've rated it yourself as -being quite low - 2 or 3 out of 10.	0:27:00	0:27:04
-This is mirrored -in what we saw in your EEG.	0:27:04	0:27:07
-We can see -from your brain activity...	0:27:08	0:27:10
-..that you spend a lot of time -in light sleep.	0:27:10	0:27:14
-This is common -for people with depression.	0:27:14	0:27:17
-The long-term impact of having -a variable sleep schedule...	0:27:17	0:27:20
-..and not having -very refreshing sleeps...	0:27:21	0:27:23
-..are they can impact -our physical and mental health.	0:27:23	0:27:27
-Putting all this information -together...	0:27:28	0:27:31
-..it looks like -you're chronically sleep deprived.	0:27:31	0:27:34
-Right. So how do I improve my sleep?	0:27:34	0:27:37
-Make sure -you have a regular routine.	0:27:37	0:27:40
-Make sure you try to get up -at the same time every day...	0:27:41	0:27:44
-..and that you eat your meals -at the same time.	0:27:44	0:27:47
-All of that helps -to synchronize your main body clock.	0:27:47	0:27:51
-Avoid bright lights, alcohol and -caffeine in the hours before bed.	0:27:51	0:27:55
-No phones for an hour -before I go to bed, no TV?	0:27:56	0:27:59
-No. Just things that are relaxing.	0:28:00	0:28:02
-It does seem -the warning signs are there...	0:28:02	0:28:05
-..that this is something -you really should address.	0:28:05	0:28:08
-That was hard to hear.	0:28:15	0:28:17
-I'm in such a bad habit -with my sleeping.	0:28:17	0:28:20
-Having science back this up...	0:28:22	0:28:25
-..has really made me think.	0:28:25	0:28:27
-I have to change my ways.	0:28:27	0:28:30
-One of Matt's friends -is Tom Fletcher...	0:28:37	0:28:39
-..from the world-famous bands -McFly and McBusted.	0:28:39	0:28:43
-Lately, he has spoken publicly...	0:28:44	0:28:46
-..about his battle with depression -and bipolar disorder.	0:28:47	0:28:51
-Like Matt, -he's had sleeping problems...	0:28:53	0:28:56
-..but speaking about his experiences -has been a great solace to him.	0:28:57	0:29:01
-I can honestly say -it's been 100% positive.	0:29:03	0:29:08
-I can't think of an instance where -there was a negative reaction...	0:29:09	0:29:12
-..to me being -more open about mental health...	0:29:13	0:29:15
-..or sharing my own experiences.	0:29:16	0:29:18
-One of the things -I was worried about...	0:29:19	0:29:21
-..was that by going to get help -and speaking to someone...	0:29:21	0:29:25
-..and taking medication, -that I would lose...	0:29:25	0:29:29
-Was it this kind of mania...	0:29:30	0:29:32
-Was it this kind of mania... - -Your creative edge.	0:29:32	0:29:34
-Yes, was it like a superpower...	0:29:34	0:29:37
-..and the downside -was the intense dark periods.	0:29:38	0:29:42
-Growing up in the public eye -adds a certain amount of pressure.	0:29:42	0:29:46
-You get so excited about this album -and taking over the world.	0:29:47	0:29:50
-Even though, when I look back...	0:29:50	0:29:53
-..we were No.1, -we had sell-out tours and things...	0:29:53	0:29:56
-..you can't help feel that my dreams -were far bigger than that.	0:29:57	0:30:01
-These crazy, unrealistic, -unachievable things.	0:30:02	0:30:05
-When they didn't happen, that would -send me off to these dark places.	0:30:05	0:30:10
-Sleep was a big thing. -I never slept.	0:30:10	0:30:12
-I feel so stupid talking about this!	0:30:13	0:30:15
-I was terrified of aliens. -I know this sounds really silly.	0:30:15	0:30:19
-The term paralysed with fear...	0:30:20	0:30:22
-..that was me for 90% of my life -at night time.	0:30:22	0:30:26
-I'd get myself into such a state...	0:30:27	0:30:29
-..where I couldn't even get out -to turn the light on...	0:30:29	0:30:32
-..to get a drink or move enough -to pull the covers up.	0:30:33	0:30:36
-I was terrified so I never slept.	0:30:36	0:30:39
-I was just angry, miserable, -emotional, unreasonable.	0:30:39	0:30:44
-You can't see -light at the end of the tunnel...	0:30:45	0:30:47
-..and you don't even -want to look for it.	0:30:47	0:30:50
-That's what I found anyway - -you're so consumed by this misery.	0:30:50	0:30:53
-So 30,000-40,000 people -couldn't gee you up?	0:30:54	0:30:57
-No, definitely not.	0:30:57	0:30:58
-I would be a moody so-and-so -onstage, hating life, hating myself.	0:30:58	0:31:03
-I can't imagine that.	0:31:03	0:31:05
-Almost resenting...	0:31:05	0:31:06
-..this amazing -and incredible opportunity...	0:31:07	0:31:10
-..and feeling like you resent it.	0:31:10	0:31:12
-Depression affects 300 million -people, of all ages, worldwide	0:31:13	0:31:18
-After hiding his depression -for years...	0:31:21	0:31:24
-..in the summer of 2013, Matt told -his story to a national magazine.	0:31:24	0:31:28
-Until that point, he hadn't told -anyone about that moment in Spain.	0:31:28	0:31:33
-Not even his parents.	0:31:33	0:31:35
-When he went public, -he actually rang me and said...	0:31:36	0:31:40
-.."Dad, tomorrow they are putting -this piece in the magazine.	0:31:41	0:31:45
-"It's something about my life."	0:31:45	0:31:47
-I said, "You told me, son.	0:31:48	0:31:50
-"You told me a few years ago -on that veranda."	0:31:50	0:31:53
-He was shocked.	0:31:54	0:31:55
-We were actually on the veranda -in Spain...	0:31:55	0:31:58
-..where he was contemplating -ending his life.	0:31:58	0:32:01
-He told me when he was drunk -and he didn't remember.	0:32:01	0:32:04
-I remember the morning -I read about Matt's story.	0:32:04	0:32:08
-It was a huge shock to the system.	0:32:09	0:32:11
-I could not believe it at all.	0:32:11	0:32:13
-Hearing it had got so far, -so dark, so horrific.	0:32:14	0:32:18
-Even thinking...	0:32:19	0:32:22
-..about Matt considering doing -something so horrific is awful.	0:32:23	0:32:28
-But to try to commit suicide...	0:32:28	0:32:30
-..well, you won't get anything worse -than that about your best friend.	0:32:30	0:32:35
-Obviously, the first thing -I wanted to do was phone Matt...	0:32:35	0:32:39
-..just to make sure he was OK.	0:32:39	0:32:41
-You think you know some people...	0:32:44	0:32:46
-Matt was also keen -to speak openly...	0:32:47	0:32:49
-..to the millions of This Morning -viewers and his colleagues.	0:32:49	0:32:53
-My colleagues always saw me as -a happy, lively, happy-go-lucky guy.	0:32:54	0:32:58
-And now I was going to have -to discuss my illness...	0:32:58	0:33:02
-..and explain that there was -another side to Matt Johnson.	0:33:02	0:33:06
-Eamonn and Ruth -were fantastic with me.	0:33:07	0:33:11
-I was so surprised.	0:33:11	0:33:12
-Never, ever would I -have put you in that bracket.	0:33:12	0:33:15
-Never did I think -you had troubles like that.	0:33:15	0:33:18
-You were either over it -or were really good at masking it.	0:33:18	0:33:23
-I reckon it's the second -rather than the first...	0:33:23	0:33:26
-..because doing what we do, -it's the most insecure profession.	0:33:26	0:33:32
-You are constantly judged -and criticized...	0:33:32	0:33:35
-..you rely -on people's praise or otherwise.	0:33:35	0:33:39
-Approval.	0:33:39	0:33:40
-Approval. - -Approval. All the time.	0:33:40	0:33:42
-Of course that affects your mood.	0:33:43	0:33:46
-Social media, -what the public think of you...	0:33:46	0:33:49
-..and how newspapers review you.	0:33:49	0:33:51
-So you are in a tough environment...	0:33:51	0:33:54
-..for someone who doesn't feel -too strong and stable at times.	0:33:54	0:33:58
-But did I ever pick that up -with you? No.	0:33:59	0:34:01
-Matt was happy-go-lucky.	0:34:01	0:34:03
-If I could come back in a second -life, I'd like to come back as you!	0:34:04	0:34:08
-That's what a lot of people said...	0:34:08	0:34:10
-..it was more of a "what the hell -has he got to be depressed about?"	0:34:10	0:34:14
-Talking to someone -can be therapy in itself.	0:34:15	0:34:19
-So what we need is more awareness, -in particular among men...	0:34:20	0:34:25
-..and in people whose jobs mean -there's pressure to be strong...	0:34:25	0:34:30
-..so they feel -there's someone there for them.	0:34:30	0:34:34
-GPs receive training -about depression...	0:34:34	0:34:38
-..and in dealing with depression.	0:34:38	0:34:40
-It's a more common problem -than we think.	0:34:40	0:34:45
-Over 300 people commit suicide -in Wales every year...	0:34:46	0:34:49
-..with 4 times as many men -than women killing themselves	0:34:50	0:34:54
-Olympic Park, London	0:34:56	0:34:57
-Nowadays, Matt is passionate...	0:34:57	0:34:59
-..about the need to encourage others -to speak out and seek help.	0:35:00	0:35:03
-In 2014, -he became an ambassador for Mind...	0:35:04	0:35:07
-..the charity which aims to -raise awareness and understanding...	0:35:07	0:35:11
-..of mental health problems.	0:35:11	0:35:13
-Today, he's filming -a new campaign for Mind.	0:35:14	0:35:17
-Congratulations -on passing your first challenge.	0:35:17	0:35:20
-Now it's on to the second. -We're in this together. Let's do it!	0:35:20	0:35:24
-The great thing about Matt -is even though he's suffering...	0:35:24	0:35:28
-..he's the first to ask others -if everything's OK.	0:35:28	0:35:31
-He has that empathy.	0:35:31	0:35:32
-I think the illness -has given him that quality...	0:35:33	0:35:36
-..that he's maybe more sensitive -and more ready to help.	0:35:36	0:35:40
-That's obvious in the fact that -he wants to share his story now...	0:35:40	0:35:44
-..and that he feels this urge...	0:35:44	0:35:46
-..to make sure there is an open -discussion about mental health...	0:35:46	0:35:51
-..and that people do speak about it.	0:35:51	0:35:53
-I'm very proud of him for that.	0:35:54	0:35:55
-Fair play, -it's a brave and brilliant thing.	0:35:56	0:35:59
-.	0:36:01	0:36:01
-Subtitles	0:36:04	0:36:04
-Subtitles - -Subtitles	0:36:04	0:36:06
-As a Mind ambassador, I've spoken -to a lot of young people.	0:36:11	0:36:15
-There is a lot more pressure -on them these days.	0:36:15	0:36:20
-They have to look good, -do well in school...	0:36:21	0:36:24
-..be successful -in everything they do.	0:36:25	0:36:27
-And with social media, it's -nearly impossible to switch off.	0:36:28	0:36:32
-50% of cases of mental illness have -started by the time a child is 14	0:36:32	0:36:38
-The welfare and development team -at Plasmawr School...	0:36:45	0:36:48
-..headed by Catrin Pallot...	0:36:48	0:36:50
-..prioritizes pupil welfare -within the school.	0:36:50	0:36:53
-With the pressure on children -to achieve academically...	0:36:54	0:36:58
-..with all these steps that measure -success within schools these days...	0:36:58	0:37:02
-..I think it's important we -place greater emphasis on welfare.	0:37:03	0:37:07
-I'm lucky in my job that -I get to meet lots of young people.	0:37:07	0:37:10
-Sadly, I come across -a lot of young people...	0:37:10	0:37:13
-..who are going through -difficult periods...	0:37:13	0:37:16
-..a period of mental illness, -who are frustrated, low and anxious.	0:37:16	0:37:20
-The school encourages the children -not to be afraid to talk openly...	0:37:23	0:37:27
-..and to face their worries head on.	0:37:28	0:37:30
-They are also working hard -at eradicating the stigma...	0:37:30	0:37:34
-..which exists around boys.	0:37:34	0:37:36
-The majority of students I support -are girls. Why do you think that is?	0:37:36	0:37:41
-Boys wouldn't have the confidence -to go to you...	0:37:41	0:37:44
-..or do anything about it.	0:37:45	0:37:47
-Boys worry more -about what other people think.	0:37:47	0:37:53
-Discussing problems, -even small things...	0:37:53	0:37:56
-..is rooted in girls' upbringing...	0:37:56	0:37:59
-..but with boys there's a stereotype -that they have to be strong...	0:37:59	0:38:04
-..and not show any feelings, -which has now become a norm.	0:38:04	0:38:09
-In society, -boys our age don't open up.	0:38:10	0:38:14
-They think it isn't cool.	0:38:14	0:38:16
-I'm lucky in this school...	0:38:17	0:38:19
-..I've been able to play rugby -and be in musicals.	0:38:19	0:38:23
-I think the reason -boys think they have to be manly...	0:38:24	0:38:27
-..is because these days, everyone -is on the Web, everyones online.	0:38:27	0:38:32
-Everyone's on Snapchat, -Instagram, Facebook...	0:38:33	0:38:36
-..so I think it's had an effect.	0:38:36	0:38:38
-Boys think -people are going to see them online.	0:38:38	0:38:41
-Increasingly in schools, -there's the pastoral side.	0:38:42	0:38:45
-The staff on the pastoral side -have to deal more and more...	0:38:45	0:38:49
-..with the strain -that social media places on schools.	0:38:49	0:38:53
-I am deeply, deeply worried -professionally and personally...	0:38:53	0:38:57
-..about young people.	0:38:57	0:38:59
-The things they face these days -are really hard. There is no escape.	0:38:59	0:39:03
-When I was in school, -if someone was nasty to you...	0:39:03	0:39:07
-..you would go home and that's it.	0:39:07	0:39:10
-There is no escape nowadays.	0:39:10	0:39:12
-That Snapchat is there -in the middle of the night.	0:39:12	0:39:15
-Unless every parent knows exactly -what their child is doing...	0:39:15	0:39:20
-..it is very difficult -to control the situation.	0:39:20	0:39:23
-Parents say -that teenage boys don't talk.	0:39:24	0:39:26
-They lock themselves in -their bedroom. But they talk to me.	0:39:27	0:39:30
-So how can parents help young men -to be open about their feelings?	0:39:30	0:39:35
-Our parents were all raised -in the last generation...	0:39:35	0:39:40
-..where things were even worse.	0:39:40	0:39:42
-There's some kind of momentum -as far as men are concerned.	0:39:42	0:39:46
-The danger is -that it carries on with us.	0:39:46	0:39:50
-However, stopping that with -the momentum that it's created...	0:39:51	0:39:55
-..you're talking about the media and -everything, will be a tough task.	0:39:55	0:39:59
-How do we break that pattern then?	0:40:01	0:40:03
-With support at home.	0:40:04	0:40:06
-It can be something as simple...	0:40:07	0:40:08
-..as parents asking their child -about their day and so on.	0:40:09	0:40:12
-They can choose -to be honest about it...	0:40:12	0:40:15
-..but then people need to understand -that it can be a huge help...	0:40:15	0:40:19
-..to talk about it with someone, -especially with your parents.	0:40:19	0:40:23
-I think it's important -that schools are very open.	0:40:24	0:40:27
-We are an inclusive community. We -try to give all our pupils a voice.	0:40:27	0:40:31
-We celebrate diversity -so that everyone feels they belong.	0:40:31	0:40:35
-Give pupils a chance to trust in -and share their worries...	0:40:35	0:40:39
-..with other pupils -rather than adults.	0:40:39	0:40:41
-It's often the young people -who have the answers, not us adults.	0:40:41	0:40:46
-Boys, you've blown me away. -It's been an incredible experience.	0:40:46	0:40:50
-It's really opened my eyes. When I -was in school, this never happened.	0:40:50	0:40:55
-It's inspirational.	0:40:55	0:40:58
-When I was in school, -boys didn't talk.	0:40:59	0:41:02
-Now I can quite clearly see -that things have happily moved on.	0:41:02	0:41:08
-So thank you very much -and keep moving forward.	0:41:08	0:41:11
-At Cardiff University, -psychiatrist Dr Rhys Bevan Jones...	0:41:14	0:41:18
-..is creating a website to help -young people and their families....	0:41:18	0:41:22
-..to understand and deal with -mental issues such as depression.	0:41:23	0:41:27
-It's another development...	0:41:27	0:41:29
-..that will help to encourage -dialogue and remove stigma.	0:41:29	0:41:33
-When you go into the package...	0:41:34	0:41:36
-..you see a colourful welcome -screen, not too many words...	0:41:36	0:41:41
-..with characters that use metaphors -to describe depression.	0:41:41	0:41:47
-Among the metaphors used -is the black dog.	0:41:51	0:41:55
-People also use metaphors -to do with the weather...	0:41:56	0:41:59
-..such as there's fog in their head.	0:41:59	0:42:02
-Also, things like -having a monster inside them.	0:42:02	0:42:05
-This is important -because it's really difficult...	0:42:07	0:42:11
-..to get your feelings and emotions -and put them into words.	0:42:12	0:42:15
-So, very good.	0:42:16	0:42:17
-Another exciting development -in Cardiff...	0:42:19	0:42:21
-..is the pioneering research into -the role of genes in mental illness.	0:42:22	0:42:26
-Now knowing more about the family -history of depression and suicide...	0:42:26	0:42:30
-..Matt and his family -have been invited to take part.	0:42:31	0:42:34
-The hope is -developing new treatments.	0:42:34	0:42:38
-But for Matt, talking -has been a very important therapy...	0:42:39	0:42:43
-..while learning to live -with depression.	0:42:43	0:42:46
-I've never really -come to terms with it.	0:42:46	0:42:51
-I'm still looking for answers.	0:42:51	0:42:54
-I'm still on medication. -I have been for 17, 18 years now.	0:42:55	0:42:59
-But, I'm happy that, maybe, -I'm not so much a lost cause.	0:43:00	0:43:06
-I think this documentary...	0:43:06	0:43:08
-..what you are doing now -making it more public...	0:43:08	0:43:11
-..making it more...	0:43:12	0:43:13
-..that there is a way out -for people.	0:43:13	0:43:16
-If someone came to me for advice...	0:43:17	0:43:19
-..I would probably give them advice -that I should be giving myself!	0:43:19	0:43:24
-When you had the confidence to tell -me, "There's something wrong"...	0:43:24	0:43:28
-..I probably was better to you -than to myself.	0:43:29	0:43:31
-It's been difficult.	0:43:31	0:43:33
-I came through that era -where I hid it for so long.	0:43:33	0:43:36
-It becomes a habit.	0:43:36	0:43:37
-It becomes a habit. - -It becomes a habit to do things.	0:43:37	0:43:40
-You do know that -with everything that I do...	0:43:40	0:43:43
-..and I...	0:43:44	0:43:45
-I want to help everybody.	0:43:52	0:43:54
-But all the...	0:43:55	0:43:56
-Shit!	0:43:57	0:43:58
-Take your time. Take your time.	0:44:06	0:44:09
-It's hard hearing that, Dad.	0:44:10	0:44:11
-All the marathons, fundraising -and the documentary...	0:44:12	0:44:18
-..is 'cos I want one person -to help themselves.	0:44:18	0:44:21
-As much as everybody.	0:44:25	0:44:26
-So you saying that...	0:44:29	0:44:30
-..gives me something, because -that's what I want you to think.	0:44:33	0:44:37
-I want you to practise what you -preach. It's really important to me.	0:44:37	0:44:41
-You're the example of why men -don't talk and why they should talk.	0:44:41	0:44:46
-Will you promise me -that you'll do that too?	0:44:47	0:44:50
-I've got to. I can't sit down -and listen to you crying about it.	0:44:50	0:44:54
-Shall we take this dog for a walk? -Can I have a cuddle first?!	0:44:54	0:44:58
-I've spent a lot of time -with Matt and his family.	0:45:06	0:45:09
-They are a lovely, close group, -they enjoy each others company.	0:45:09	0:45:13
-The only way for things to get -better is to be open and honest.	0:45:14	0:45:18
-Seeing that happening is great.	0:45:18	0:45:20
-The most important thing -to give people...	0:45:23	0:45:26
-..is just to check in on them -to see if they're OK.	0:45:26	0:45:29
-We all go through tough times -in our lives.	0:45:29	0:45:32
-If we do, -doing those little things...	0:45:32	0:45:35
-..knocking on the door, -sending a text, phoning them...	0:45:35	0:45:39
-..taking them a bunch of flowers -or just saying a kind word...	0:45:39	0:45:43
-..can transform someone's day.	0:45:43	0:45:45
-Doing those little things.	0:45:45	0:45:47
-It's quite overwhelming the amount -of messages you get on social media.	0:45:51	0:45:55
-But, for some reason, anything about -mental health seems to catch my eye.	0:45:55	0:46:00
-I always take a bit more time...	0:46:00	0:46:03
-..and I'm a bit more caring -in what I'm saying back...	0:46:03	0:46:07
-..to someone -who's taken that step to be open.	0:46:07	0:46:09
-Just simply by sharing -what we've been through...	0:46:11	0:46:14
-..if that can do some good -for one person...	0:46:14	0:46:16
-..then it's kind of -our responsibility to do that.	0:46:17	0:46:20
-If I could go back -to the young 27-year-old Matt...	0:46:25	0:46:31
-..living alone in his apartment...	0:46:31	0:46:35
-..I would tell him -to just be kind to himself.	0:46:36	0:46:42
-More importantly, -go and talk to somebody.	0:46:42	0:46:47
-S4C Subtitles by Testun Cyf.	0:47:23	0:47:25
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Matt Johnson: Iselder a fi

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