Episode 3 Christine & Adrian's Friendship Test

Northern Ireland is one of the friendliest places in the UK.

And that is official.

But in this series, I'm going to be pushing that friendliness right

to the very limit, to see if Northern Ireland can be friends

with my old pal, Adrian Chiles.

Let's just say, so far it's been a bit of a titanic challenge.

Whether it has been in the city...

-This is Adrian Chiles, ladies.

-Hi. How are you doing?

Oh, Adrian Chiles, the miserable one!

LAUGHTER

..or out in the countryside...

Oh, caught it! You did catch it.

Oh!

He even struggled on the coast.

-Am I sticking out here or blending in?

-No, you're blending in. Yeah.

Sure we're all different.

LAUGHTER

In many ways up to now, this has been a bit of a journey looking at

contemporary and traditional friendships here

in Northern Ireland.

But today, we're going to go into the future.

I just hope Adrian is ready.

Oh, my goodness.

MUSIC: Back To The Future Theme

-Come on, Christine.

-HE COUGHS

In you get. We're going for a drive.

So, I have to ask you, why are we sitting in a DeLorean?

I'll tell you why. Because you said it was about the future.

This goes Back To The Future, made in Northern Ireland.

-I thought it was a good idea.

-There was a lot of thought went into that.

But you're wrong. That's not what I meant. I was talking about the future of friendship,

and how young people are now friends with people they've met online,

through social media, that's the sort of thing I was getting at.

OK, but I'm not sure I believe in all of that.

I don't do social media, but, I don't know,

I just think if you've got a friend who you know, you meet,

you spend time with, that's one thing.

A friend over social media that you don't meet strikes me as being a bit

-different. But what do I do? I don't know it. Christine, educate me.

-OK.

Tell me something else. How do you get out of a car like this?

At my age, you just can't get out.

What do you do?

Let's try.

It was patently obvious the only kind of posts Chiles had made

involved a pen and paper.

It was time to get him logged onto the benefits of social media.

And as usual, Northern Ireland has a leading light in this very world.

Hey, guys. So today, I'm going to do a video for you guys,

basically showing you my everyday make-up routine.

16-year-old Sophie has amassed a substantial following on YouTube,

where people can watch her beauty videos and interact with her.

Remember to like, comment and subscribe.

Tell me what you guys want to see

and, yeah, I'll be back with more videos soon. Bye!

My friend Adrian, unfortunately,

just doesn't get the social media thing at all.

Doesn't get how people become friends, doesn't understand it, OK?

I've got some elementary knowledge. I know there are different things.

I got a vague understanding of what Instagram is.

How many Instagram thingies have you got?

I have 727,000 Instagram followers.

Right. That's nearly three-quarters of a million. That's a lot.

How many people watch your YouTube channel?

I've got over 300,000 actual subscribers on it,

but some of my videos have got up to a million views. So...

OK.

What percentage of them might you describe as friends?

Do they feel like friends?

I try and talk to them as much as possible,

like private message them on Instagram.

I try to take away that barrier so that the people who do follow me,

I am quite friendly and I try and make more of a friendship thing.

My best friend actually messaged me on Twitter saying,

"Hey, where's your dress from, it's really nice?"

And for something to kind of start off with just like a little message,

and she's been my best friend now for like three years.

-And where is she?

-In Sydenham. It's not that far.

So it gains you friends, or you have online relationships with people.

-Does it lose you friends as well?

-A lot of the people that I even like thought were friends,

as soon as I started doing this, it was like,

they didn't want nothing to do with me while I was kind of doing the

online thing. It was crazy in school.

Like, I got bullied in school for what I was doing.

People just didn't like the idea of someone doing something different.

So, I definitely lost what I thought were friends,

but then gained friends who really do support me in what I'm doing.

What about if somebody in San Diego says, "Your hair looks rubbish,"

or something, does that upset you?

For me, not really.

Maybe in the beginning when it was

less people. Now it's kind of like...

-You know.

-If that happens, just get me their address

and I'll Facetime them.

Isn't it interesting, when I think back to school days,

and I'm sure you are the same, where you had one, two, three, four,

five maybe close mates.

Young people are now looking at their followers on social media,

and that therefore allows people to see how popular you are.

You are used to having one or two friends.

It's now like friendship groups, you call them.

I'm in the popular friendship group.

But just about! I'm like the least important one from that group.

-That's kind of the way it works now.

-We'd love to see what you do.

I have no idea how you put this all together.

So can I be a little bystander?

Yeah, I do most of my stuff in my room,

so if you want to come up to my room, we can see what I get up to.

OK. Very exciting.

Excellent. I suggest you sit here.

-I'm not invited?

-I don't think you should be.

How am I going to know what's happening?

There's an iPad, you can watch it like the millions of others.

-Do you know how to work the iPad?

-CHRISTINE LAUGHS

Yes, I do know to work an iPad!

Can I just say? See how much of a star she is.

-She's got an iPad to match her jumper.

-Thank you.

-That's class.

SHE LAUGHS Take it away.

I'll follow you, my dear. Very exciting, yes.

I'll sit here in a stranger's house with a yellow iPad.

This is 21st century.

It was showtime.

So Sophia, I and our crew relocated to Sophia's studio, or bedroom,

as it's commonly known.

Adrian, meanwhile, watched the show go out online

after a slight hiccup.

What do I do about that?

Yeah, so this is like Instagram live.

So, basically, you just go live and people can like ask you questions.

And I can see people logging on already there.

Already we have 954 people in here.

-Just already.

-That's incredible.

Look at all these. Look.

I've been on about 30 seconds.

"You're gorg"? Oh, gorge.

It's such a great way of interacting straightaway to everyone that's

really intrigued by what you do, and your life.

"Love Latino women, like the one in the yellow top."

She's from flipping Newtownards!

I like to try to be as close as possible to the people

-that follow me.

-I thought there'd be more questions on here.

It's just saying how much they love her and how beautiful she is.

I have got a few questions for you, my dear.

This is our quickfire round, everybody.

What quality do you most admire in a friend?

I feel as if there are a lot of qualities you're going to want in a friend...

Somebody called carollajnkisskiss - "Have you ever been to Poland?"

Well, I have. Can I join in?

I've been to Poland. "Hi, you don't know me..."

If one pop star could be your best friend, who would it be?

If I could have a best friend, dead or living,

my best friend would be Kurt Cobain.

-Really?

-I would bring him back and he would be my best like boyfriend.

-Definitely.

-That is very interesting.

Right, OK, finally, what advice

would you give to this man to make more friends?

And please check out the tie, everybody.

Oh, God! I can't watch this. I didn't know about this.

No. Switch it off.

Maybe just look a bit more friendly!

Oh, God, it's stressful.

Social media frightens me.

The sight of his younger, happier-looking self may

have scared him, but had my Luddite pal become even slightly switched

on to the benefits of social media?

So, Adrian, what did you think of Sophia?

I thought Sophia was just remarkably intelligent

and nice and seemed quite centred.

I suppose my worry would be, somebody that young,

a million followers, great.

But, you know, things can go the other way.

You can stop being flavour of the month.

I must say, I'm not quite sure

I understood the point of the Instagram broadcast,

in terms of the stuff coming in was sort of content...

It was either, "You're beautiful, I love you,"

"Who's the other woman?"

And then some stuff in Spanish.

And then some obscenities.

I didn't see what it added to the sum of human knowledge.

It allows people at home to feel like they get to know her.

That she is their friend, actually,

because she's talking directly on their level, that's all.

-Right, OK.

-Yeah.

I'm slightly bewildered. But generally impressed.

-Good.

-Let's sum it up like that. Where is next?

-OK.

-You know what, don't you worry about it!

-OK.

-Yeah.

-I'll just follow you.

It's easier like that.

After his brief foray into the virtual world of social media,

I sensed Adrian needed some reassurance about friendships' future.

So I'd arranged to get the thoughts of the next generation on the matter

at a rather appropriately named location.

Friends' School in Lisburn, where a special class of mates,

chums and pals had been assembled to meet us.

Hello, everybody. How are we all?

All good? Yes.

Look at those big, happy, smiley faces.

Right now, boys and girls,

I am here today because I want to talk about friendship.

Who has got a best friend in here?

-MANY CHILDREN:

-Me!

-Ooh, that's lovely.

All the hands go up. Very, very nice.

Well, I've come along today with a very best mate...

Well, I wouldn't really say best mate.

-His name is Adrian. ALL:

-Hello, Adrian.

Oh, that's such a lovely feeling. I want to be a teacher.

Now he can be a little bit grumpy.

LAUGHTER I'm not going to lie.

Can you do a little grumpy face for me? Oh, you must admit Adrian before.

That looked very, very like him.

That's brilliant down at the back there, look!

Well anyway, I want to prove to Adrian today, boys and girls,

just how friendly we all are, just how friendly you all are.

Is that OK? Can I get a big cheer for being friends?

-Yes? ALL:

-Yeah!

-Right, what I wanted to do,

when I go, "Go", go and find your best friend.

OK? One, two...

Hang on, hang on, hang on!

You two can't wait to hug each other.

Just wait a second. One, two, three, friends, go!

After partnering up with their pals,

it was time to get our classmates' views on friendship.

Why is she your friend?

Because we both laugh together.

What sort of things do you look for in a friend?

Friendly, kind and helpful.

And how long have you been friends?

-Four years.

-Four?! You're only six!

Seven!

When you're really old ladies, like Christine,

-do you think you'll still be friends?

-Yeah.

When you three are as old as me and your hair is my colour...

-Yeah...

-We can dye it!

You'd dye it?!

It's so bad, is it, I should dye it?

-Will you three still be friends, do you think?

-ALL:

-Yeah.

-Friends forever.

-Friends forever.

Everyone was keen to stay friends for life,

and in one case, beyond.

Are you going to be friends for all your life?

-BOTH:

-Yeah.

-Even when I die, I'm going to be buried with...

Oh, that's a dark note.

And that wasn't the only theme on which they were united.

Do you think boys can be friends with girls?

-No.

-No.

You see, you say that now.

-BOTH:

-No.

-They fart all the time.

They fart all the time?

Well, Lily and Rory are friends.

No, she likes me, I do not like her.

-Controversial!

-No.

-Why is that? KID SHOUTS:

-Because they stink.

-They stink?

-Yeah. Even you.

LAUGHTER

I thought we were friends.

My dog is my best friend, I have to say.

-What about your dog - is your dog one of your best friends?

-Yeah.

-Why?

-Then them.

-Do you give it lots of cuddles?

-Yeah.

-Do you walk him?

-Yeah.

It's a girl, is it? You see, you can be friends with girls.

-Only a dog!

-LAUGHTER

It was all heart-warming stuff,

but Adrian couldn't help but bring up the subject of disagreements.

Evie, do you two ever have arguments?

-Sometimes.

-Hang on, I wasn't talking to you. Wait a second.

Tilly, just pipe down a little bit.

-Evie?

-Sometimes.

-Do you? What do you have arguments about?

For who's being the mum in mums and dads.

Who wants to be a dad?

And he even felt it necessary to try and start one.

Even though you're best friends, I bet I can make you have an argument.

-No.

-Are you ready?

OK, who's the best footballer of the three of you?

-We're all the same.

-No, you can't... That's a copout.

Who's the best?

Oh, you think you're... He's saying he's the best.

-Me second, he's third.

-No, I'm not!

You see, told you. Argument. I've got something important to ask you.

What?

I would like to be your friend.

OK.

What is your answer? I can't bear to listen to this.

-Yes.

-Yeah!

And with that... BELL DINGS

..the bell for break time went.

The children headed out to play one of their favourite games and we

decided to join in.

You can cross the Red Sea if...

..you wear glasses.

You're mine, you're mine, you're mine!

Until it all got a bit much for Adrian and he tried to escape.

Sometimes you can have too many friends, I guess.

THEY SPEAK INAUDIBLY

It was time to blind the usually bewildered child, sorry,

Chiles with an disputable scientific proof of our friendliness.

I need you to pay attention now, you see, OK?

I brought you to the psychology department of Queens University.

-Right, looks good.

-Very nice place, yes.

Apparently, there is a science behind friendship.

-Never!

-Yeah.

-And do they know what it is here?

-Well, yeah, I think they do.

I'm going to prove it to you. But I need you to look the part.

-Thank you very much.

-What are we channelling here, some 1970s university?

That's...that is the one. I know you can do this well.

You take charge of that.

-Very good.

-We'll whip the tie on.

And I think you might be good to go.

Get walking, that's it.

Dr Gary McKeown's areas of expertise include how we communicate

and interact socially.

And he's developed an experiment that can tell how close two friends

really are by revealing the secret signals they give off.

In this experimental set-up, we essentially,

we get people in and get them to just have natural interactions

with one another so that we can measure what's going on.

And we use these machines at the bottom here to measure the facial

expressions and then that informs us about the relationship between the

-two people.

-That's interesting.

-Let's go and give it a try,

-let's have a sit through.

-OK, right, yeah.

There we go. Can you see us?

I'm assuming that you need two aligned minds, friends for years,

that's what makes this experiment really interesting.

Friends of many years' standing.

The longer, the better.

I've got the very thing for you.

Adrian knew the perfect pair to call on.

Friends of more than 40 years who he had met way back in show one.

Let's hug it out. Fantastic.

I've found some friends. Proper friends,

Nan and Betty, they're the bee's knees.

OK, ladies, make your way into my laboratory.

Nan, I'd like you in the seat to the right.

Betty, to the left.

Don't be afraid, it's not an interrogation.

OK? All you've got to do is look at each other...

..and just chat.

# Ready or not, here comes science

# Ooh-wee. #

Remember the time travelling?

Lucille fell through the bed, you fell down the stairs

and I fell through the chair?

-That was a good holiday, wasn't it?

-Lucy broke the bed.

Yeah, I remember jumping over and I took the blame of it.

So here, you're measuring...

Stuff around there, the size and intensity of the smile.

Along here, we're really interested in the relationship between

what's going on in this face and what's going on in this face over here.

I think he wanted to get rid of us, so he did.

-That's right.

-Didn't blame him.

How significant

is the smile and just how much someone smiles at one another?

Smiling is hugely significant,

and the level of intensity that goes on within the smiles.

Actually, these two over here are the smile-ometer.

Have you seen this? Brow lowerer, upper lip raiser, dimp dimpler.

Man, look at his face doing the dimple.

You see, I truly believe we smile more in Northern Ireland than anywhere else.

Certainly anywhere else in the UK.

Yeah, and there are definitely cultural differences

whenever we do that, and it probably is the case.

We've done research...

..looking at differences between Serbia and Peru and Guatemala

and Northern Ireland, so I couldn't say for sure within the UK context,

but for sure in Northern Ireland, we smile a lot more.

-We're up there.

-Yeah.

-There's plenty of smiling going on.

-Yes, yes, for sure.

-That was a good holiday, wasn't it?

-Lucy broke her bed.

-Yeah, remember jumping over.

-And I took the blame of it.

I honestly think

we could just all walk out quietly here and come back

tomorrow morning, in 18 hours' time, and they'd be still be...

Come on, let's go. Let's just leave.

-They'll be looked after.

-No.

Used to come up every Tuesday and get soda bread.

-Out at Jordan's?

-Jordan's.

And the apple tart...

Half for now and half for...

Oh, Nan, things we do.

-I think it's been great but hasn't it?

-Yeah.

-Great.

After letting Gary crunch and consider all the

data from Nan and Betty's conversation,

it was time for the results of our experiment.

Would they have proved the theory right and displayed the secret signals

only real friends show?

Nan and Betty are claiming they're friends,

but we need a scientific analysis.

Are they really scientifically friends?

Certainly they do everything that would show them to be very strong

-friends.

-When you look at the film of them,

what does the body language tell you?

We have an example here when one of them leans back,

the other one leans back very shortly afterwards.

And that's a sort of classic kind of mirroring technique.

-Oh, yeah!

-You've treated this, haven't you?

In this clip, they're talking about cooking together an awful lot and

there's just this huge amount of shared laughter between them and you

wouldn't find that in a situation

where you had a stranger talking with a friend.

You just wouldn't find that laughter.

They are acting out a play.

They've been there many, many times before and reassuring each other,

you're there, you're a rock in my life.

We needed some scientific bottom and you've given me some scientific

bottom to all this, hasn't he?

Yes, yes. Very friendly bottom.

Very friendly bottom. Yes.

Gary, you are undoubtedly my favourite psychologist anywhere

in the world now. You're the man.

Of course, he's from Northern Ireland!

-He's the friendliest.

-He's the friendliest anywhere!

Our friendship journey was nearly at an end.

I'd shown Adrian the very best of Northern Ireland.

However, there was an elephant in the room.

A big one!

OK, I give in.

It is probably the friendliest place I have ever been.

However, there is one thing you can't deliver.

-What's that, then?

-Politicians,

two politicians from either side of the divide,

not just civil to each other but actually friends.

Actually bosom buddies. If you can deliver that, well.

-No, it can be difficult, obviously.

-You can't deliver that.

-It can be difficult. Obviously, there's been a bit of history.

-No. You're never going to do it.

-However...

-No.

-..I think...

-No.

..I think I can, I think I can.

If I do, does that confirm everything for you?

-No, no. Yes.

-And OK, then.

-Right, OK.

Adrian was clearly in disbelief at this point,

as you probably are at home, but I'd been given a tip-off that

two councillors in Downpatrick,

one from the DUP and the other from the SDLP,

weren't only chums but besties.

Of course, it could all have been just a rumour,

so we'd need to hunt high and low.

First, we checked in the council chamber,

but everyone was out to lunch.

We scoured the town centre with no success.

We even scoped out funky monkeys,

but things just started going downhill.

In fact, we were about to give up when suddenly,

we heard a friendly warning.

-SHOUTS:

-Fore!

And that's when we spotted them, strolling down the fairway.

Meet Terry and Billy,

whose friendship is anything but par for the course.

-Oh, don't tell me we find them. Unbelievable.

-There they are.

-Gentlemen, nice to see you. Hello, Terry.

-Nice to see you.

-Nice to see you, yeah.

-Elusive, elusive.

-Nice to meet you, yeah.

-Hello, Billy.

-You're very welcome.

-Thank you. Enjoying a round of golf, then?

-Yes, on a good blustery day.

But you are hard-working local politicians. You don't just play golf and enjoy ourselves all day.

Well, as the old saying goes, we work hard and play hard!

How do you two know each other? Where does the friendship start from?

Well, it started about 20 years ago

when myself got into community work

within my local area of Killyleagh.

Terry was an activist in the Crossgar

and we'd worked closely on a lot of social issues.

Basically, that's when we first sort of met and struck up a friendship.

What, did it start with an argument? Look, I mean, SDLP, DUP.

I don't know if you've heard, but there's been the odd conflict and

exchange of words over the years.

Well, the way I look at it, it's democracy in action.

There's no point you at the debating table sitting mute and sitting quiet.

As they say over here, it's no harm having a good old barney now and again.

We do have a lot of arguments on issues that we don't agree on

and it can get hot and heavy at times but whenever we come out,

we sit over a cup of tea and a sandwich and talk through it.

What about the party high command?

They know we work very well and I think the winners here are our

constituents. We do it for the love of our constituency and our

constituents and it seems to be paying off, paying dividends.

And for the love of each other.

Well, I wouldn't say that!

Billy and Terry are such good mates,

they even go on holiday together and the pair's friendly sense of rivalry

has all also benefited local charities.

Almost three years ago, we were asked to get into the boxing ring

to raise money for suicide awareness.

-And who won?

-I'm claiming I won, but...

The local community was teed up

and people were stopping us in the street and saying, hope you knock the daylights out of that boy.

And as I say, even on the night in question, we were dressed in our party colours -

I was dressed in black and red boxing shorts for Down GAA, and a black vest.

So any other challenges? I don't know, acrobatics and marathon running?

We had an eating competition. Eating a sub roll,

and I ate him under the table.

We also had a cycle run there just before Christmas.

-I won.

-For the... He did. For the homeless.

We have raised near £15,000 between us in the last two and a half years

for a wee local charity.

I think you do need to go straight to Stormont on sort everything out.

Yeah. Right, today!

You know, a lot of hard work has to be done up there.

But there needs to be a few friendships made, don't there?

You two are obviously the absolute foundation.

I think friendships are very important.

It might have different points of view and difference of opinions on

things but at the heels of the hunt, you have to say, look,

I mightn't like this or they mightn't like that,

but you have to do what's right for the people that put you in.

-Yeah.

-Striking up friendships - I believe it's a big, big help.

Reason being, I'm no less a unionist because I've got a working

relationship with Terry in local issues and that.

Terry is no less a nationalist

because he's working alongside me

and if we all get down and do that,

I think this wee country would be a better place for everyone.

Well, listen. Sorry to interrupt your round on such a beautiful day.

-Play through, gentlemen.

-Absolutely. Thank you very much.

-Enjoy your day.

-Good luck at your swings.

-No problem!

Well, Adrian. What do you think of that?

I'm convinced. OK, you've worn me down.

They prove it. Friendship is everywhere.

Friendship is like gorse bushes in Northern Ireland.

They're just everywhere you can see.

-Fair enough, you win.

-Well, Northern Ireland's made friends

with you, too. And we all know that's a miracle.

That absolutely is a miracle. And this only one way to round this off.

I want friends to reunite. Come on.

# You've got a friend in me

# Yeah, you've got a friend in me. #

And that's what we arranged at the place we started our journey,

the spirit of Belfast,

where some of the friends we'd made throughout the series came together

to hear Adrian spread the good news.

Friends, Belfast people, countryfolk, lend me your ears.

I've seen the light right here in Northern Ireland.

Yes, you've got a friend in me.

So yes,

I'll be there for you when the rain starts to fall.

I'll be there for you,

like I've been there before.

And finally, let me say, for the record,

if you threw a party and invited everyone you knew,

you would see the biggest gift would be from me and the card attached

would say,

thank you for being a friend.

# And when we both get older

# With walking canes and hair of grey

# Have no fear even though it's hard to hear

# I will stand real close and say

# Thank you for being a friend. #