After the Holiday Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents

This programme contains strong language

We look back on a summer of partying...

We're going to go and see some titties!

..where the legendary Paradise Resorts in Thailand

were overrun by crazy kids and their mates.

Little bit scared. Agh!

But their snooping parents went along, too,

to spy on what actually went on.

He's taking pictures of that lovely young lady doing a special dance.

-The drinking...

-HE BELCHES LOUDLY

Thailand, we are here.

Within... Then.... Ah, I'm so drunk.

..the pulling...

Funny enough, girl was a boy.

..the falling out.

-Oi, oi-oi-oi.

-Leave me be.

-Oi, oi, come here.

It was a journey of self discovery.

-One gay.

-Another gay.

For the parents, it was the chance of a lifetime, secretly watching...

-The girl will bend over like that.

-No, no!

..sneakily spying...

He's really, really tired. He's collapsed, really.

KNOCKING ON WINDOW

What was that?

..and outrageously hiding,

all to see if their kids could be independent...

Oh!

..and if they were finally growing up.

Your room is a pigsty!

But did it make them closer and change anything...

Oh, f...!

I've watched everything. Money in the knickers...

ALL LAUGH

..or drive a wedge between them?

-He just sees it as a betrayal of trust.

-Stop, stop, stop, stop!

Now, the parents have revealed themselves to their kids

and the holidays are over.

It's time to see what's changed and what they all learned.

I always worried about what other people thought about who I am

and now I don't really give two toss.

I can't believe that I slept with a prostitute on telly.

He was demonstrating a total lack of respect.

You can have, like, a great group of friends

and go out on a night out with them and everything will be fine,

but going on holiday with them is a different ball game.

MUSIC: "Troublemaker" by Olly Murs ft Flo Rida

20-year-old Essex boy Pat was leaving Romford

for the beaches of Thailand.

The main reason I wanted to go to Thailand in the first place

was to see what the girls were like, see how I could get on out there,

cos it's a holiday, that's what you want to do.

At home, Pat loved a good party and life was all about pulling.

Girls and that, I'm... I suppose I am quite successful.

I know what I'm doing,

I just talk a lot and I don't muck about, really.

I just say what's what and, most of the time, it works.

But mum Lisa didn't always approve.

I would like Patrick to be a little bit more responsible.

At the moment, I think he goes out too much.

And before party-boy Pat set off, Mum had some words of advice.

Come back with an experience that's valuable,

but I just want you to be safe.

Pat was off to the tropical island of Koh Pha Ngan,

with his chosen wingmen Phil and Dan.

But did he listen to Mum's advice?

Ha-ha, why have you brought them?

-Just in case.

-SHE GUFFAWS

When I get into it, I don't really have much time

for putting on a condom.

Yeah, I know I shouldn't really go bareback, but...

it just happens, don't it?

But when mum Lisa and Tina watch Pat for the first time,

the johnnies were no joke.

He don't listen to a word I say, does he?

He does, I think he's just showing off a little bit.

-Well, spying on Pat was interesting.

-Funny.

-Yeah, it was funny at times.

-Yeah.

-Harrowing at other times.

-Yeah.

And that was just for starters.

Pat had an objective - get smashed and shack up.

Yeah, go on, suck it, love.

When I'm really drunk, the only thing I've got on my mind is, like,

to, you know, go out and sleep with someone

or find someone to take home.

So, yeah, I got really drunk and that was the only thing on my mind,

that's the only thing I wanted to do.

So Pat, it's all about a numbers game for him when it comes to women.

As soon as he's got a little bit of alcohol in him,

not even drunk but just a little bit, then he's just...

he turns into an animal.

When Pat's drunk, he loses that special something, he's not...

he's definitely not as handsome when he's drunk.

I got with a few girls tonight.

One was from Galway and she thought I was Irish as well

because I told her I was from Cappoquin

and I spoke in an Irish accent, which worked, I got away with it.

A couple of other girls, they were going home tomorrow so they went home early.

Yeah, it was an eventful night for the first night.

Mission accomplished, it was on to his next quest -

bedding a local beauty.

I think if I went home with, like, only shagging one bird,

as long as she was Thai, I wouldn't mind. As long as I could say I come

out to Thailand, shagged a Thai bird and went home, that's all right.

One of the things I want to do is, like, sleep

with, like, kind of every kind of race going.

And the next night, Pat had his eye focused on the target

and he was determined not to miss.

I'd love to have a bit of that, to be honest, because she's pretty...

Oh, I don't know if she's got a willy...to be honest.

If she flopped out a willy, I think I'd walk away,

but if she was beautiful and she's flopped out a willy, I'd be like, "Oh, why not?"

Ladyboys aside, nothing was going to stop Pat's dream being fulfilled,

whatever the cost.

With my mum the thing, she was most angry about

was probably the prostitute and...

but leading up to that as well, the drunkenness,

because I think she puts that drunkenness

hand in hand with the prostitute.

I wanted to speak to him and say,

"Look, do you know what you look like?

"Do you know what you're doing or saying or whatever?"

-Yeah, "Pack it in, Pat." That's what you wanted to say, wasn't it?

-Yeah, yeah.

But Pat was on a roll

and needed some dosh from Dan to pay for his lady of the night.

Pat said to me, "Oh, quick, give me 1,000 baht."

I was like, "Why do you want 1,000 baht?"

He goes, "She said we'll have sex for 1,000 baht."

I said, "Why are you going to pay for that? You're an idiot."

In the end, it works out about 20 quid to pay for the prostitute,

so it's not all bad, really.

He had to pay money to go with that Thai bird.

-Oh, jeez!

-Exactly, why? Why do you need to pay for that?

Oh, for God's sake, Patrick.

That was very uncomfortable, very worrying

-and I was...really embarrassed.

-Mortified.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that says it.

For my mum to see me sleep with a prostitute,

it does make you feel a bit bad because that's just not something you want to see.

My mum obviously knows I go out and sleep with people,

but a prostitute's kind of low-low, so, yeah, that wasn't a cool thing.

-He was demonstrating a total lack of respect.

-Mm.

And that really, really hurt me, deeply.

But when a cocksure Pat returned to his hotel later,

only one thing was certain.

I had a great time. It was a good shag.

Kind of fantastic because I want to do... In my life,

I want to do every single race going and Thai was obviously

on the list and now I can tick that one off. That's one of many.

Pat may have scored, but for the lads, it was an own goal.

-Funny enough, the girl was a boy, so...

-No, she weren't a boy.

-OK.

-She was a bloke?!

-She weren't a boy?

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that she was a girl because she

was all wet and that, so it can't work...

I know they make the cut-and-shuts,

but I don't think they work that good.

She had a vagina, mate.

-He wouldn't say if he was protected or not, would he?

-No.

I know it's not a question that... You don't want to ask the boy,

but you know when you think to yourself,

"Well, hold on a minute, if you was that much of a numpty

"to go off and do it, was you that much of a numpty not to...

-"you know, use protection?"

-Mm.

-But he wouldn't actually tell us, would he?

-No.

The second we got home, one of the first things Mum was on to me

about was going down to the clinic.

I went down there in the end, and it was all all right, so it's not bad.

And after that bareback gallop,

the next ride Pat took he rode with a saddle.

How you doing, boys?

This is great, Pat. "Ride an elephant," you said.

This jungle journey was also a good time for Pat to reflect

-on his adventures.

-Making me a bit nervous.

Since Thailand, there is a couple of little things I regret.

You know, I regret getting so drunk on the first couple of nights.

Even though the first night we had a good night, the second night really was...

It's funny to look back, I'll laugh about it in ten years' time

but at the minute, I'm proper embarrassed about

what happened with the prostitute and stuff like that. It's just terrible, really.

And even with that ladyboy. So that's disgusting.

But it's done now, and can't do nothing about it

and I suppose you've got to learn your lesson from it.

Oh, wow.

ALL LAUGH

God, I'm scared, though.

Yeah, I think I've realised that maybe I should calm down a little.

I think Thailand was a bit of a wake-up call for Patrick.

Now he seems to have much more of a zest for life

-and an enthusiasm. He's motivated again.

-Yeah.

When we was out in Thailand, I realised that there was a lot

more to just Romford, there's another half of the world

that I don't even know nothing about, so one of the main things

is that I do want to go out travelling again now.

I know I have to earn money, no-one else will pay for that,

so all I want to do really is work hard for a little while

and then hopefully go sometime next year.

And a newly inspired Pat was determined not to waste

his last days on the island, going all-out for a good rave

and now strictly sticking with his best buddies.

But we're in.

Thailand's changed me in quite a few ways,

like with going out and drinking.

I've changed my ideas about that, you know.

I know it's not all about girls now, I know you can go out

and have a laugh whether you're... you know,

sitting around your mate's house for a beer

or whether you're out, you know, it's not all about that.

I've got 1,000 baht in my hand which is about 25 quid which is

enough for a few drinks.

It is the price of a prostitute, but I've grown up

since the other day and I ain't doing that no more.

-PHIL:

-Good lad!

-Thanks, Phil.

He says thank you a lot now.

And I think it's because

he appreciates what he's got

a lot more.

I wanted to stay there and the boys want to go home

and it's a team effort,

so if they want to go home, we've got to go home.

Since I've got back I still go out a bit,

but it's like, I used to go out like every night,

and now it's only once or twice a week.

And last day, with girls off the cards for good,

Pat was thankful he could seek some relief elsewhere.

But little did he know

that this particular body rub

would have a surprise finish.

Was as bit weird, I found, turning around and finding my mum

at the bottom of my legs, from me massage.

Lise, can you imagine if he would have asked for a happy ending?

Oh, I'd have... I just... I'd have left.

-You turn over now.

-Turn over?

-Yeah.

Which way?

Oh, fuck off. Have a look.

Was that you doing that? Fucking hell, woman.

Oi, oi, Mum!

-Hello, love.

-She had a big smile on her face

and that was really nice,

but then I thought straightaway the first thing was "prostitute"

about, "What's my mum going to think?"

I brought someone with me, because I couldn't come on my own.

Hi, Tina.

-How are you?

-I'm all right, yeah.

Well, thanks, girls.

It would have been dodgy if I'd turned round

and there was a boner going on or something, you know,

and it was my mum, that would have been awkward to explain.

Been a funny old week.

-It has indeed.

-I have to say, I was very stressed at the beginning

and to be so close to you and not be able to come and tell you

that I was worried

was really, really hard.

I think if I'd come back from Thailand and nothing had changed

then I don't think she'd be too happy about anything.

But I've come back and I think I've realised my mistakes

and she's been really happy,

so she's just been bubbly and happy since

and I think she's let it all slide.

It's weird, cos you don't think that you will change in just a week.

I think I've learnt more about myself

and I just want to keep learning more.

The outcome has been positive.

I know how much better Patrick is for it,

so that will make all the embarrassment and that

-worth it, really.

-Yeah.

20-year-old Huddersfield boy Alex was going on a trip of a lifetime,

first stop Bangkok,

with its bonkers bars and naughty nightlife.

How do you feel about seeing a girl

fire a ping-pong ball out of her pussy?

Don't remember much of Bangkok.

I remember being excited when we got there.

How exciting.

Cheers.

Back at home in Yorkshire, doting mum Suzanna...

Don't forget these, darling. Hair remover.

..felt she knew her son well.

I think Alexander's really good with money.

I'm really, really, really bad with money.

Thailand's pretty cheap, I'd like to spend 500,

that would be a good amount for me.

But it's highly unlikely.

I do, like, flash my cash

and act as if I'm a millionaire

with a teenager's wallet.

And when Alex was in the money,

what mum Suzanna didn't know was that it was spent one way.

I've never seen him really drunk at all.

He doesn't drink at home.

Within... Then... Ah, I'm so drunk.

I think his drinking did concern me at times.

I think he felt that he was on a rugby tour.

We are going to fuck shit up in Bangkok.

And to help on this mission

were best friends Josh and Tom.

Bye!

With only one night in Bangkok,

secret party-boy Alex was determined not to waste a minute.

-Tuk-tuk! Tuk-tuk!

-Tuk-tuk! Tuk-tuk!

-Tuk-tuk!

-Tuk-tuk!

-Tuk-tuk!

Whoa, look at her.

We want pussy. We want pussy!

And with cats on the menu,

these hungry tigers first lapped up plenty of giggle juice.

Don't remember what went on in the strip club at all.

Unfortunately for Alex,

Suzanna and partner Paul were spying on him for the first time.

I don't think my mum's that impressed

with me going to a strip club.

If that was one of the experiences that he needed to have, so be it.

Pole-dancing may not have concerned mum...

but Alex's wallet-opening habits did.

He's paying money?!

I was absolutely horrified

about his relationship with money

whilst we were away.

I'll flash my cash and I'll put..

I'll put money where.. where their knickers are.

I don't really care, like.

In the first night I think I spent around £200.

I woke up the next morning and thought someone had robbed me.

You've spent 6,000 baht

and you've been putting money in knickers.

I definitely wasn't shoving money down anyone's pants.

I think that was a big eye-opener for him,

not to be able to remember that and to really, really think

that he had been robbed.

After a spending frenzy in balmy Bangkok,

it was time for the relative peace and tranquillity of Koh Samui,

but Alex had a problem.

I'm spending a fucking fortune. This is going to kill me.

-Is he working out how much he's spent?

-I might cry.

Come on, let's see.

You had 1,000, didn't you, for the holiday?

Yep.

He brought £1,000 with him?

I've got 400 left.

Well, he's given away a lot of it.

Alexander hasn't told me the truth about how much he spent on the trip.

Over the holiday in Thailand

I'm pretty sure I spent about two grand.

Money issues are an ongoing discussion with us.

Might have to extend my overdraft.

Fuck it, let's go out.

Carefree and more money borrowed,

there was only one thing to do -

go on an all-day booze-bender and splash more cash.

THEY CHEER

That is disgusting, why is he drinking so quickly?

I'm pretty drunk now.

Really, really drunk now.

I'm not surprised!

Before we went out,

we decided that we were going to do loads of cultural stuff

and have a party at the same time.

When we got out there,

everything got just a bit too exciting

and erm...

we spent the whole of the duration of the trip drunk.

I mean, it was full-on drinking and that, for any parent,

you know, was excessive,

and something that we've addressed since he came back.

-I'm not liking this.

-SHE GASPS

-Oh,

-my god. You didn't know he smoked, did you?

-You didn't know?

-Oh, my god. Oh, my god. He's got a cigarette.

But smoking wasn't all.

Alex was on fire.

Pretty good.

Apart from seeing me with a cigarette in my mouth,

I think my mum was a bit disgusted

with me being in a shower with an Australian girl.

But we were on holiday, that shit happens on holiday.

He's just got loads to learn.

I've heard I ran through the hotel naked.

Honestly, I don't actually remember.

Oh, well, doesn't really matter, does it?

And as if flashing his man-bits in public wasn't enough,

when it came to the clubbing...

Music's banging, mate. I love the music here.

..it wasn't so much "bust a move"

as "break a leg".

'I was just off my head,'

dancing like an absolute tit.

And this time, Mum was there to catch his fancy footwork.

When I was in the club, that was a bittersweet memory, to be honest.

Actually he's really, really tired.

He's collapsed, really.

It was fun to be there,

but I really, really was distressed

to see the amount of...

the drinking and the.. I mean, he just seemed..

I was worried that he was going to be really ill that night.

I've cut down on my drinking

just because I'm looking after my body more,

like, I go to the gym twice a day now,

and it's gone well so far, and saved me money.

When we got back from Thailand, we addressed his drinking

and I suppose... I think that, you know,

your drinking really does show out more than anything else,

and the change in him since he's come back

has been incredible.

But back in Thailand, nursing a hangover,

Alex was about to get the shock of his life.

I've had a really good time so far.

-I have.

-I like Thailand, love it.

Me and the lads, we were out for the whole day,

'just chilling on the beach.

'We were lying on our deckchairs,

'suddenly this Thai shopper... selling woman

'with scarves on her arms

'comes up to me, taps me on the shoulder going,

-'"Shopping, shopping."'

-Shopping, cheap.

-No, thank you.

-Cheap.

That suits you. That suits you.

And I'm getting really pissed off.

-Shopping.

-No, sorry.

-That colour suits you.

-Very cheap.

The reveal was probably one of the best memories of the week.

-Cheap for take home.

-Oh, it's my mum.

-It's your

-mum? Shopping.

-It's my fucking mum.

Mum? THEY LAUGH

'Penny dropped, I just knew.'

I was like, "Fuck."

I've watched everything.

-Gallons of alcohol.

-Oh, I've been stitched up.

The money in the knickers.

What about the cigarettes?

Ah...

But that was just a holiday thing

and it doesn't...

It won't continue back here.

I think it's been harder for me, but you won't have realised that.

-No, I understand that, like, for me...

-Do you?

Obviously, I didn't know you were here,

-so I'm just having a great time.

-Oh, I know.

And you're there learning stuff about me.

I don't think Alexander's learnt the value of money yet,

I think he's got a long way to go.

His... His priorities are in the wrong place.

Flashing cash everywhere - everywhere Alexander.

-You were buying drinks for everyone.

-I know.

But, well, does that tell you anything?

I'm just losing my money.

-But you're not losing it, you're giving it away.

-No.

Your hard-earned cash, you're giving it away.

I regretted my spending habits for about a week after I got back

and now it's just gone back to the same-old same old,

so I'm spending an absolute fortune again.

Also in Bangkok for a mere 24 hours

was 22-year-old London boy Joss.

-# YMCA

-It's fun to stay at the

# YMCA... #

'Since I've come back from Thailand, so much has changed for me.'

-Everyone's just so much more happier since we've come back.

-Definitely.

In the UK, an unemployed Joss aspired to stardom.

My massive goal and dream

would be to perform on the West End stage,

but I'll probably end up working at McDonald's, to be fair, like.

He's desperately looking for a job.

He's been looking for ages and he does apply and apply and apply.

But it wasn't just Joss's theatrical dream that needed addressing.

Sexually you've got to be very careful.

He's also been less than straight with mum Penny

regarding his sexuality.

I'm quite a secretive person,

I don't really tell my mum a lot of stuff about who I pull,

who I kiss - I never kiss and tell.

Bring back, you know, nothing you can't leave on the mantelpiece

on full display, or..

La-la-la-la-la-la...

Yeah, yeah, I know!

He sort of told me a couple of years ago

that he doesn't really know which way he wants to go in life.

I think she's aware a little bit about, like, what sexuality I am,

but we don't really talk about it.

I don't think he will have some sort of great epiphany

and suddenly decide that he is gay or he is straight.

I think going away to Thailand,

I think it'll just really, like, start my life, kind of thing.

Because right now it's gone... downhill and it's not good.

Joss was hitting Thailand with bosom-buddies Eman and Danielle.

Bangkok is not ready for us.

In a city famed for its liberal attitudes,

Joss and the gang first checked out Bangkok's legendary ladyboy cabaret.

'They're stunning, they are very, very stunning,'

like, you'll look at them and go, "Wow."

I respect the ladyboys so much,

like, what they've gone through

and what they've done to become who they want to be is crazy.

An inspired Joss was revelling in the show,

but what he didn't know was mum and partner Roberto were in on the act.

Some of them look amazing

but then obviously some of them have still got a dick.

I'm a bit like, "I can see your bulge,"

like, "Oh, my god, what is going on downstairs?"

Looking good upstairs, downstairs is not working.

It's a good opportunity

for me to see Joss

and to see him coping in a totally different culture,

out with his friends,

how he adapted and how he managed to survive

in somewhere so, so different,

when he's never been, really, abroad before.

He's posing more than they are! Oh, bless him!

And after the ladyboys,

a jovial Joss grabbed his moment in the spotlight

with some moves of his own.

He's going for it, he's going for it!

But it was Eman that finally stole the show.

THEY LAUGH

Bangkok was absolutely flabbergasting, amazing.

Everyone was in that... That party vibe, and it was just like

even if you were, like, really hung-over,

you were really tired, you would just be in that party vibe...

-It did... It stunk out there, though.

-Oh, yeah.

All danced out and it was straight from Bangkok to Koh Samui.

-Welcome to Samui!

-ALL: Whoo!

And after that raucous ride...

ELEPHANT TRUMPETS

..Joss was saddled up and raring to go.

-You look like you're so comfortable up there.

-Yeah.

-You were born to ride an elephant.

-Yep.

You've both got big schlongs.

I named my elephant Jumbo, and I do miss him.

My elephant was called Cump.

Thailand had helped Joss feel free.

I feel more comfortable with my identity

and just embracing who I am.

We're having a bit of a freshen-up now because we feel a bit dirty.

-Feel minging.

-Do you want some more?

-Yeah.

-Dan, do you want some more?

This is why it's good hanging around gay guys.

-Well, one gay.

-Another gay.

-One gay.

-Another gay.

-Yeah, one gay.

And fag hags.

I always worried about what other people thought about who I am

and now I don't really give two toss.

I'm so happy my best friend's a gay as well.

-Basically Emanuel's a poof.

-Shut up!

Jo-Jo is ready to wave his freak flag.

For Penny, it was confirmation

of her son's sexuality.

I guess we do know him a bit better.

I think he's had the opportunity to voice things

that he wouldn't have voiced.

That's a bit of eye candy.

-There's condoms in the hotel room.

-HE CHUCKLES

Maybe he's not telling us something we didn't know,

but it's confirming things that we thought.

But maybe you didn't realise

we understood you as well as we did.

For Mum, certain questions may have been answered,

but there was still more to come from Joss.

I got bullied at school nastily, like,

I was bricked, I was bloody stabbed, I was set on fire and...

I think...I can't remember one single day at school

where...I was happy and something went right.

Like, I remember every single day

getting either pushed down the stairs,

or getting dragged across the corridors and it was nasty,

it was horrible. But without that happening

I wouldn't be the stronger person I am today.

He's very strong.

-God, yes.

-He's really strong inside.

I feel really comfortable here,

like, I've enjoyed every single moment of being here,

but it has been hard, growing up,

it's been a hard journey.

It's been a hard journey to find out who I am right now.

As a mum, it is hard to hear

some of the things that he's had to go through,

because I think he's very good at protecting me from how he feels.

I just want to go and give him a hug and tell him it's going to be OK.

Can't wait.

I love you, Joss.

I've come back and I've got a job now

and I've signed up to, like, a new agency and I've..

I've come back as a brand-new person, just more fresher.

And I think, if I didn't go to Thailand,

I would not be where I am right now in such a more positive place.

I think Thailand, really,

in some ways, sort of saved him

from getting himself into a real depressed state.

He was getting very unhappy

and I think it really gave him the opportunity

to do that self-analysis,

get himself back in gear, grow his confidence.

I wish for a six-pack and not a fat-pack.

This was Joss's journey,

but there was one thing he hadn't discovered yet.

Mum Penny had been desperate to see her son

after a roller coaster of a week.

But when a knock at the door came...

Oh, fuck off.

..nobody could have predicted the outcome.

Yeah, yeah, no, fuck off.

At the time, it felt the whole holiday was all fake,

it just went from really happy to really fake.

-Ohh!

-Oh, boy!

Hello, guys.

Where's he gone?

-Oh, he's in the toilet.

-Is he all right?

-Oh, no.

-He's going to cry.

It will be all right.

-Cringe moment.

-I don't understand why you freaked out so much.

Would you freak out if your mum was there?

I probably would have drop-kicked her, but..

Come out, honey.

He won't come out.

-'It wasn't a happy reveal.'

-'No.'

Was it? It was... It was very stressful, very emotional.

Shouldn't have done it, should I?

Haven't seen anything bad.

Joss?

He just sees it as a betrayal of trust

and I know exactly what's going through his head.

-It was an emotional night.

-Yeah.

-It was a horrible night,

like, it was just...shell-shocked.

SHE SIGHS

But it wasn't all bad.

After some time out,

Joss waved his peace flag and faced Mum.

I hated having to lie to you

-because I don't tell you lies.

-No, I know.

-You know I don't.

'Because my mum saw my story about my sexuality and everything'

and she accepts who I am and she just embraces who I am,

and she's always going to me, "You're my best friend,"

like, "I'm not going to worry about who you are

"just as long as you're happy."

And it's always good to get the reassurance from your mum

and know that she's always there supporting you.

Just go home now and just push everything

and just make sure I don't let myself down again.

You never let yourself down,

you've just got pushed down

and just lost a bit of your confidence,

because it's been knocked and knocked.

'Since we've come back from Thailand,

'he's definitely got his mojo back,'

he's really looking to get on with his life now

and that's really good, good to see,

that's the best thing that came out of it for us, really.

Bristol party-girl Jo

was waited upon hand-and-foot by mum Julie.

Bit higher.

Going to Thailand made me appreciate my mum more.

She does tidy up after me a lot.

Mum, have you see my scarf?

-She likes it. She likes cleaning.

-She does like it.

Mum, have you seen my grey shorts?

Before Jo took off for Thailand

she would rely on Julie 100%.

Jo, haven't you forgotten something?

-Yeah.

-Sun cream.

And a frustrated stepdad Rob

hadn't had the best relationship with Jo either.

We had a rocky stage with Jo

where the evil stepfather,

wouldn't let her do this, et cetera.

Jo and Rob now, after Thailand, is...

is nice for me,

because it takes the pressure off me,

I can just leave them in a room together and not worry.

I mean, she'll even make a cup of tea for me now, it's wonderful.

It may just be a brew at home,

but Jo also had a reputation as a girl that loved going on the lash.

That's what we wanted to see, we wanted to see party Jo.

A vodka and Red Bull as well, please.

My toes curl when she goes out in Bristol.

I think, "Oh, what are you going to get up to tonight, Jo?"

Jo was bound for Patong on the paradise island of Phuket

and she invited best mates Shaz and Natalie along for the party.

Taxi time!

And on arrival at the hotel,

things didn't get off to a smooth start for the girls.

Um, where's our suitcases? Huh?

Left our suitcases on the road, oops!

I just assumed someone was going to take it,

I know that sounds really up my own arse

but I really thought someone was going to take it.

Does anybody want a drink?

We drunk the whole minibar as well,

not realising we had to pay for it.

You have to pay for stuff out of the bar, don't you?

What, that?

Why'd they put it in there if you've got to pay for it?

-It's like, "Ooh, bar!"

-Beers.

With the revelation that nothing in life is free,

the girls made a dash for Patong's shameless saucy strip.

Little bit scared.

Quickly discovering it was a very different affair to Bristol.

It is so busy and there's people, like, ladyboys everywhere.

Yeah, can we have a photo?

-110?

-Yeah.

-For a photo?

-Yeah.

-Oh!

OK. OK, bye.

Fuck that.

-Phuket is very...

-Busy.

-Touristy, yeah, yeah.

I was like, "Is this what it's like all the time?"

A ping-pong show.

But we were just, like, "Uhh!" at the start,

and then they were following you, like, following...

"Miss, come here, miss." And you're like, "Oh, no way."

-No, thanks.

-She's not interested.

Jo wasn't liking the hassle,

but Julie was more surprised that her daughter was a party pooper.

She seems quite sober, doesn't she?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

We'll go back and party hard tomorrow.

I am quite shocked,

I thought she would have gone out there full-blast.

I need sleep, yeah, I need sleep.

With that, the girls called it a night.

-Night, guys.

-Night.

But the next evening,

Mum was on a mission to get her daughter mashed.

Oh, hi, Jo.

-Are you OK?

-Yeah, I'm good.

When Jo was away

we felt that she needed to party a little bit harder because...

That's what...

We hear stories from her friends of what Jo's like

and we didn't see that.

-Go out there and enjoy yourself, OK?

-Yeah.

It's a fantastic opportunity, go and enjoy yourself with your mates.

-I will.

-We were saying, "We can do better than this, can't we?"

I was going, "Give her some vodka." What a bad parent I am!

Give her some more vodka, what will it take?

Give her some vodka, give her some shots, in fact. No? Shots.

When my mum said that

she was disappointed that we didn't drink enough, or we're not drinking

-enough, it makes me feel like, oh, my god, I'm, like...

-Boring.

-Yes, ready.

-Finally.

Determined not to fail her party parents,

Jo tried to make up for lost time.

Drinking in Thailand is so strong.

It may be mind-bending booze,

but for Jo something wasn't quite right.

I kind of wish now

that when my mum said to party harder, we should have.

I just felt like because you're in a different country

and you're so far away and there's loads of people you don't know...

I don't know, you have to just be careful.

Caution was the name of the game for Jo,

but her parents were yet to paint the town red,

and when they did it was a real eye-opener.

Felt quite intimidated by it all

and I wouldn't like to be in a position

where I'm kind of helpless in that situation.

Then when Julie and Rob spied on Jo in a bar first-hand...

Because Jo said she would never, ever be in a club

-at the same time with you.

-Yeah.

..it all suddenly became clear.

I'll be honest, I'm not surprised

that Jo's not maybe entirely being herself, because this is quite...

-You can understand.

-It's quite scary, isn't it?

She's going to be cautious.

We decided halfway through the week,

when we were watching, that it wasn't about how drunk Jo could get,

it was about Jo discovering herself,

and it was about us, as parents,

basically being quite wrong about her.

It was a revelation for Julie and Rob,

but there was even more to come from this new mature Jo.

I do think that I see my stepdad as another dad.

I'm so glad that my mum met him,

I'm glad he moved in with us.

He's not like a replacement, obviously, he's just..

I've got two dads, basically.

When I heard that conversation, that was really touching.

Obviously I didn't know Rob was going to, like,

know that stuff I said about him,

but I'm really glad he did hear it,

because we wouldn't be as close, like, now.

It was a massive moment,

but quickly forgotten

when Julie and Rob got to snoop in Jo's room

and it was apparent that some things would never change.

Oh, my fucking god.

-Look at the state of that.

-Oh, my god.

Oh, my god, that room was a state.

You couldn't walk... Like, there was no...

Like, you couldn't see the floor sometimes, it was that bad.

I'm shocked.

At least we left a challenge for the maids.

I'm just thinking of what Jo's room would look like

if you didn't tidy it.

There's still no household chores done by Jo.

I haven't seen her tidy her bedroom

-since she's been back.

-No, but I've been really good,

because I know that Jo wants her bedroom left like that,

so I've had to really,

like, "Shut the door, Julie, walk away."

Oh, my god!

But there was little chance of Jo walking away

on her last day in Thailand

when her parents surprised her.

What the fuck? What the fuck?!

What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck?!

Your room is a pigsty!

I've never seen anything like it.

It was such a shock to see, like, my mum and Rob.

Jo, seriously,

major proud of you - me and Rob have been so proud of you, all of you.

-Yeah.

-Look at it.

-I've misjudged you.

-Why?

-I thought you were a tearaway.

-No.

-But you're not.

-You're a little softy, aren't you? A little softy.

-I am.

'Ever since I've come back,'

I just feel like the changes in our family are, like,

we're all just a lot closer.

I think Jo is a... is a lot more grown up...

-Yeah.

-..than she makes on at home.

-She put us to shame, really.

She does. You're such a... such a bad mother.

20-year-old Bristol student Billy

was about to jet off halfway around the world

on his first-ever lads' holiday.

Would you wear these?

But before he left, mum Jan had a couple of concerns.

No, I think I'll leave them here.

Are you planning to drink every night?

I will, at some point, be very, very, very, very, very drunk.

Definitely, definitely, definitely drank too much on this holiday.

But it wasn't just the boozing,

it was Billy trying to keep up with his mates that worried Mum.

Billy's very strong in making his own mind up, but not always.

Everybody succumbs to peer pressure at some point in their lives.

I think it's a general part of growing up.

You can have, like, a great group of friends

and go out on a night out with them and everything will be fine,

but going on holiday with them is a different ball game.

Billy was travelling to the beautiful island of Koh Samui

with best beer-buddies Jay and Ali,

and on arrival it was clear he had a different outlook to the boys.

If I was on my own, it would all be about the culture,

but because I've got Ali and Jay with me, I think...

What are you talking about?! This guy is like...

Beer o'clock. Drink, drink, drink, pussy!

I may as well do the honours, yeah?

And it was Ali's way that won the day.

Whatever you drink tonight, I'll drink.

-We'll hold you to that as well.

-You are going to be on your arse, mate, serious.

I think the moments where I gave in to peer pressure in Thailand

were those live-for-the-moment minutes

where I had to either do it or, you know, not do it.

Billy may have been determined to match the boys

but what he didn't know was mum Jan and family friend Andi

were now watching and about to be shocked.

HE BELCHES

When we first started to spy on him, I felt quite excited

and cheeky and naughty.

Never have I ever lasted 30 seconds with a girl.

Really drunk, my cock didn't work once.

THEY LAUGH

Billy...

That's a little bit cringey, I don't want to hear all about that.

And that drinking game was just for starters.

Where there's booze there had to be girls.

We're going to go to the wet T-shirt competition and see some titties.

Not only was mum having to hear her son's cocky confessions...

Boobies!

..when she got a chance to spy close up...

He's taking pictures of that lovely young lady doing a special dance.

..she witnessed Billy's cheesy one-liners.

-They're chatting up the girls now, aren't they?

-Yeah, definitely chatting her up.

-Guess what?

-What?

And one of them's trying to...

What a terrible chat-up line, it makes me

feel like "Oh, my god, you've got such a cheek, boy".

I was just being totally honest when it came to the chat-up lines.

I could see her nipples so I thought I'd let them know

that I was seeing their nipples.

If anything I was being a friend helping them out

like, "Put your nipples away."

No, don't, keep them out.

But this trip wasn't just about girls, it was about getting smashed.

The drinking in Thailand is insane

because everything out there is dirt cheap.

Really do have to pace yourself out there,

otherwise you are going to be a complete mess.

And getting wasted every night meant no bailing on the boys.

-I'm dreading the fact that you want to get smashed again tonight.

-Oh, of course, bruv.

There were points definitely where, you know, I'm knocking back drinks

and thinking to myself, "I really don't want to do this."

The bonkers boozing was taking its toll

and mum was concerned Billy was being egged on.

-Looks slightly...

-He's hammered already, isn't he?

-He is, isn't he?

It looks like he was drinking under duress there, didn't it?

-Yes, yes.

-I think he felt he had to do it.

-Yeah.

It takes a very strong person to not succumb to peer pressure,

but if you're outnumbered it's very difficult not to succumb to it.

I think on the holiday it comes across as me

being a bit peer pressured, but when thinking about it myself

I think it was more of me wanting to keep the group happy.

For Billy, it was all about keeping his mates sweet,

but one night when they tried to ditch him, things began to change.

-Billy...

-I'm out here, you're making secret phone calls to girls...

I'm making a phone call in front of you.

Girls you've met tonight, you're pointing at Ali saying "Let's meet them."

Did you meet them? Oh, oi, Billy.

I'm not telling you to fuck off, you do your thing,

-don't worry about it..

-Oi, oi, oi... oi, oi, oi, come out here.

DOOR SLAMS I recognise that, slamming of doors.

Oh, I'm unhappy about that.

We met some girls, they said, "Do you want to come to the after

"party?" It was just me and Ali, they only know us.

Billy wants to come along, they only know us, they only want us to come,

and I told Billy, he got really upset, told me to fuck off.

I wasn't expecting to get into arguments with them, to be fair.

There's always little squabbles

but I didn't think it'd escalate to what it did in the end.

We're all here to have a good time,

like I don't know why like you're arguing.

At the end of the day if he's coming in here, sneaking out on the phone to go

and meet girls, but taking you, and saying, "No, Billy you can't come with," who are you to do that?

-Do whatever you want to do.

-OK, fine.

Oi, I don't even know why you're both arguing.

The most difficult part of the experience was thinking

and feeling that Billy wasn't really appreciated by his friends

for that moment when there was a disagreement.

For your sake, for my sake and for his sake, please, man.

'It was important for me to sort of remain myself'

and, you know, hopefully things would pan out in my favour.

You do find out an awful lot about people

when you spend a lot of time with them.

Some of it's negative, some of it's positive,

but overall I think Billy's quite an easygoing guy and he gets on

with virtually everybody, it takes a lot to rile him.

And the next day, a calm and determined Billy was ready

to move on, take control and salvage his precious holiday.

Just got up.

I was there to experience the culture,

to see what Thailand had to offer.

We've kind of thrown away the morning.

'I think my friends come across as being a little bit mean.'

A little bit annoyed that we've done that.'

Because their whole idea of going to Thailand was just

to pull loads of women, which they didn't do anyway.

Today, I really hope that Billy makes a decision

and the other guys follow him

and do what he wants to do rather than Billy being led by the others.

And he did just that.

-So we need to get a taxi to go to see Buddha.

-Go to the temple.

Buddha.

Go to the temple and shit.

At the Buddhist temple

it was clear a new, enlightened Billy was emerging.

My mum would be glad that I came somewhere like here, show that

I'm not just the type of person that goes out getting pissed

every night. Being drunk at night, you're going to forget a lot of

things. Being here right now, I'm not going to forget something like this.

-Oh. That is really good.

-That's good, that's really good.

It was important for me to do my own thing

because Thailand's one of those places

that you know, you don't get an offer like that come twice

and I wanted to, you know, do as much as I can, with or without them.

I think Billy actually found it quite frustrating

with the thought of his friends lying in bed and he wanted to go out

and do more and experience more,

so I'm quite glad that he had the get-up-and-go to do those things.

And as the holiday drew to a close,

Billy was determined not to waste another second in paradise.

It's three o'clock in the afternoon, boys are still in bed.

I've had a massage, had a dip,

and I'm enjoying just having some me time at the moment.

Thailand's inspired me to go travelling a lot more.

Definitely want to go to Australia next.

But before Billy could realise any backpacking dreams,

there was still one last night in Thailand,

and a massive surprise.

Before the reveal, I was

so nervous about knowing that I'd be seeing him shortly.

Stop, stop, stop, stop.

Don't get any money out, don't get any money out.

I've got you some money, honey, I've got you some money.

I've got you some money, darling.

When I first saw my mum, it didn't really kick in that it was her,

and I was like, "Who the fuck is this?"

I was very shocked when I'd seen her,

but in a way I was kind of happy that I'd seen her as well.

The fact that he was pleased to see me was a huge relief.

Not embarrassed or disappointed in me at all?

-Yeah, that you didn't pull!

-Absolutely not at all.

Yes. Mum approves of my behaviour, see.

Told you I've nothing to hide.

After his holiday in Thailand, he realised

that he'd actually drank an awful lot

and he'd probably put his body through some serious punishment.

I've been quite calm when it comes to drinking,

I've definitely learnt that I cannot go out every day of the week

and get smashed like that again.

I think I had to be quite mature about a few things.

You certainly give things a lot of thought before you do things

and I think that makes you a better person for it.

I think my mum's always had faith in me anyway when it comes to

going out and looking after myself, and I think, you know, this

just was the icing on the cake and now she knows exactly what I'm

like and she doesn't have to worry about what I get up to any more.

Thailand has made me realise that he is very grown-up.

He's got his head screwed on. I think I'm going

to lay off a little bit more.

The only time I was a bit concerned about how you were feeling

was when you had the little bit of a disagreement with Jay and Ali.

-Oh, yeah, I was pissed off for a day or two about that.

-Yeah.

I could see it had upset you.

I told you mate, I told you.

Me and Jay didn't talk for a few weeks but things are sorted with

that now, and things with Ali have always been good anyway. We sorted

things out straightaway, because he was quite apologetic and said

quite a few times that he was really happy that I took him on holiday.

Also in Koh Samui that week was 22-year-old Essex girl

and university student Agi with her mum Fatou.

If we hadn't have gone to Thailand I don't think she would have

really understood the pressures that sort of I feel like I'm under.

But life's burdens meant Agi had dropped out of uni three times,

but mum Fatou thought she'd just lost focus.

Sometimes it's good for you to do things for yourself

and finish it before you start with something else.

I'm going to be a perpetual student for my whole life.

But it wasn't just the studying.

Coming from a strict Muslim background,

there was no boozing at home.

When it comes to me and Islam and like, you know, maybe having

a drink, I know what I'm doing, I know if it's right or wrong.

We don't discuss about drinking really,

because we haven't got that culture.

My only concern is that I heard about all these wild parties

and all those things.

I know you don't drink so those things I'm not bothered about.

If I see Agi drink, I'll be shocked.

We're not going to go and get the vodka buckets or anything like that.

I am glad that she got to see the real me.

And joining Agi on this trip of a lifetime

were best mates Aisha and Moria.

Bye!

See you sooner than you think.

On arrival in Koh Samui and 6,000 miles from her mum,

or so she thought, Agi had one priority.

I think we're all really just ready to like go out and have fun.

-Can I have a mojito, please?

-Can we have three mojitos?

-Three mojitos.

Thailand, we are here. Chink, chink, chink.

That's really tasty.

With the constraints of home lifted

and a cocktail menu to work through, Agi got down to business.

I am also going to have the lemon daiquiri.

Daiquiri.

Daiquiri.

This is a Caipirinha.

And what Agi didn't suspect was mum Fatou

and her Auntie Ramou were here for the first time, keeping a beady eye.

Oh, my god.

It was terrible spying on Agi because I trust her.

Amazing, I love my cocktails.

The drinking culture in Thailand is exactly

what I thought it would be - buckets, alcohol, like Zante on crack.

Agi may have sussed Koh Samui's lifestyle,

but for Fatou, it wasn't quite as clear.

From what I've seen she's not drinking alcohol,

it was cocktail and it was..

it can be different kinds of cocktails like fruits and all that.

But for a high-spirited Agi,

that fruit had to be mixed with something else.

We're like fuck it, whatever, like we're just like..

Oh, whatever, let's just have fun, like...

That was quite a shock, first time hearing it, saying about

drinking alcohol. She mentioned that she have gin in her cocktail.

The fact that my mum has seen me drink is like, meh,

it's just one of those things.

I'm not a crystal meth addict. It's cocktails.

So as long as I'm staying safe, that's all that matters.

I don't like it at all. I mean, because it's not part of us,

alcohol is not part of what we do.

The realisation Agi drunk alcohol was a boozing bombshell but since

returning home, Fatou has changed her tune on the drinking front.

I know Agi as much as I know her as my daughter.

She said she had lots of cocktails and at the end she says

she have a mojito, but I can have a mojito without alcohol in it.

And I'm not in denial here, I know that she doesn't drink.

But it wasn't just the hard liquor -

a liberated Agi began to reflect on the pressures of home life.

If you're not a lawyer, doctor or accountant...

-What are you?

-..what are you?

If you're like, "Oh, actually "I want to be a fashion designer"

or "I want to be a music producer,

"I want to be this" they'll be like, "Oh, like, you know,

"focus on this and then you can do that on the side."

And Agi was determined to address some of these issues

when she returned home.

Like I feel like coming...

overcoming that African mentality where it's like your parents' word is gospel.

But what Agi didn't realise was that her mum had come to spy

and could hear every rebellious word.

It's like, OK, yeah, most of it, it is, but you guys at the same time

we have grown up in different kind of cultures,

so you have to give us a little bit of leeway and understand and sort of

comprehend that we know sort of what we're doing at the same time, too.

It's about us being able to stand on our own two feet.

I didn't realise the amount of pressure I've been putting onto Agi

that she has to be good and she have to, you know, achieve well and

do well in life and in school and everything, and I've heard it today.

I do understand, in that...

in that case she might feel pressured a little bit

because of the society we're living in,

because when we are in Africa...

I mean, well, where we come from, we...we brought up our children

or we were brought up in a certain way, you know,

to have all the standards and all these ethics, you know, when we...

anywhere we go out in the world.

So when we go somewhere else, we carry those morals and ethics

and standards to pass on to our children.

It was a moment of clarity that was clearly beneficial for both

mother and daughter.

Going to Thailand has definitely given me more focus,

more focus to finish university and just get it over and done with,

so I can travel and I can sort of get on with my life

and do all the things that I wanted to do.

Well, I'm quite... I'm quite positive now and

it's more of a...

more secure now that Agi's going to finish her university

and she's going to work,

she's going to do what she wants to do.

As the holiday drew to a close,

a newly focused Agi hit the shops for some last-minute souvenirs.

But there was one gift Agi certainly hadn't bargained for.

It was nerve-racking

because I didn't know how she's going to feel when she sees me.

'When I saw my mum and my aunt pop out...'

You! You!

..I was like, "Oh, man, fuck's sake."

I've seen so many things that you've talked about

and you have proved yourself.

Cos I feel fearless if I have...if I have your support,

I'm like "Oh, it's fine, "like, I have my mum's backing so I can do whatever."

Why do you think I'm right on your back?

Because I don't have the motivation or the determination for myself.

I think Thailand was a learning curve for Agi and for me.

I believe in you and I trust in you. I'm going to be that cool chick you're talking about.

I think my mum has a better understanding of who I am, definitely.

She's seen another side to me.

Agi and Fatou may be more sympathetic towards each other,

but there's one point yet to be cleared up.

In mojitos, I think has lemon, is it lime?

And it has, um, what is it called again?

Oh, is it mint it has?

And, er...

Do you know, I don't know that much in mojitos.

Mum,

there is alcohol in mojitos.

There's rum,

just in case you didn't know.

It was a revealing summer for the parents.

Oh, it's my mum.

Full of unexpected moments.

-Oh, for God's sake, Patrick.

-Not liking this.

And shocking discoveries.

Really drunk, my cock didn't work once.

But they learnt a lot about their kids.

I am quite shocked. I thought

she would have gone out there full blast.

As a mum, it is hard to hear

some of the things that he's had to go through.

I just want to go and give him a hug and tell him it's going to be OK.

So many sort of emotions this week.

You know, I've been angry, I've been worried for him.

How are you? Oh...

And after all the excitement and emotion...

No, fuck off.

..the experience has brought them all closer together.

Since we've come back from Thailand, he's definitely got his mojo back.

Yeah, can you do my washing?

I do think that I see my stepdad as another dad.

When I heard that conversation, that was really touching.