Cole Wanted Down Under


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Welcome to Wanted Down Under, the show that catapults a British family

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right across to the other side of the world to help them make the biggest decision of their life,

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whether to stay in the UK or to move to New Zealand.

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Sharon Cole separated from her husband Richard six years ago

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and wants a new life for herself and her boys.

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It's about a house that we shared and I think in one way,

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it would be really good for me to do something completely different.

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She's tempted by a fresh start Down Under.

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Everybody is enjoying just living, and I want to have that as well.

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But older son Oliver and brother Alex aren't so sure.

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If she wants to move on, she wants to drag us with her.

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It's to be our decision as well if she's got to move.

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Sharon's concerned about taking the boys so far away from their father Richard.

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They're the most important people in my life and their happiness matters to me more than anything.

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It's a long way to go when you're leaving loved ones behind.

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People are the most important thing.

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It's the people that make a place a home.

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The Coles have a long week ahead of them.

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-Will they vote to stay in the UK or go where they're wanted Down Under?

-It's beautiful.

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With its magnificent landscape, warmer climate and small population of just over four million,

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New Zealand is many people's idea of the perfect place to get away from it all.

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And every year, around 87,000 people emigrate in search of that better life.

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But for all these families, how hard is the decision?

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And do they find what they're looking for?

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We've given another British family the opportunity

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to spend a week Down Under, to see if it's all they dreamt it would be.

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After that, they'll have to make a decision, one way or the other -

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whether to stay in the UK or to move to New Zealand.

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Sharon Cole lives with her two sons,

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17-year-old Oliver and 14-year-old Alex, in Shipley, Yorkshire.

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Sharon is considering leaving it all behind.

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She's been separated from Richard, her husband and father of her sons, for six years.

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She dreams of a new life in New Zealand.

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This house, in many ways, has a lot of sad memories for me because of Richard leaving and everything.

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And it's about a house that we shared, and I think in one way,

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it'll be good for me to do something completely different.

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Sharon works in a hospice as a palliative care social worker,

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providing emotional and practical support to terminally ill patients and their families.

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Making the move Down Under would be difficult enough,

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so doing the same type of job might just provide the stability that she needs.

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I want to stay in palliative care, I want to do this probably until I retire.

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It's rewarding because of the very nature of the work.

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It's the kind of job where you get close to people. You can really feel as if you're making a difference.

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If I couldn't find a similar job, that would probably be a reason not to go.

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I always thought of living abroad and I always thought,

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you know, where would I like to be?

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And everything I've heard about New Zealand, it sounds like it's a lot of the things that I love about England,

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like the scenery, and it's the same size.

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I just think it may be that it's got more open spaces, a better quality of life.

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I like the fact that people spend more time outdoors.

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Fitness-mad Oliver can see the benefits of a more outdoor life in New Zealand.

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It's got less people, and it's less crowded. It's a better area, I think.

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It's easier to get jobs there because there's more

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space for that kind of thing.

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But Sharon is the real driving force behind uprooting them all.

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The boys can see just how important it is to her.

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I don't think it's just about moving house, it's just everything

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in our whole life has been in the same place.

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She just wants to have a new adventure somewhere else.

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She just needs to start again and needs a new, happy lifestyle.

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She wants a break from memories of this life.

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When we're on holiday, she forgets everything but when she comes back

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to it, it's like, "Oh, I remember all this," and horrible bad memories creep up on her.

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I want her to have a new beginning, even if I'm not included in it.

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I want her to be happy.

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Shipley has been home to the boys all their lives. Sharon's concerned about taking them away

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from their father and their friends. Will it be the right decision for them?

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My main concern is the boys,

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because they're the most important people in my life and their happiness matters to me more than anything.

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And I'm frightened that I would do this for me and perhaps,

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you know, they would get there and think, "What's happened?

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"There's nobody around that we know, nothing is familiar any more, Dad's a long way away,"

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and I'm frightened that I might be wrecking their lives, I suppose,

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that maybe I'll destabilise them in some way, because their security is really important.

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It's a really tough choice for Sharon.

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We're sending the Coles to the vibrant city of Auckland,

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situated on the northeast coast of New Zealand's North Island.

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Auckland is known as New Zealand's city of sails,

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as it has more yachts per person than any other city in the world.

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It boasts only one million people, and it's New Zealand's largest city.

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There are plenty of opportunities to enjoy its unspoilt landscape as well as its metropolitan lifestyle.

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With the Coles' possible budget of £185,000, they should be able

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to find a suitable property if they shop around.

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We've found three possible lifestyles for our family, each one

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offering a brand new way of life for them to try on their budget.

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But which one will be the most suitable?

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Auckland City has a plentiful choice of homes, from high-rise apartments

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to old-style villas.

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But property prices in the centre have boomed in recent years

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and the Coles would have to make do with less space than they have in the UK.

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This three-bed property is on the market for over £350,000,

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too much for the Coles, but they could look to the nearby suburbs.

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Here, the houses are more affordable and they'd still be close to the cosmopolitan lifestyle.

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It would only be a 20-minute commute to the city's hospices.

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So, very different from their life in the UK.

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But what about the second option?

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A home by the sea would offer them

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a more laid-back lifestyle, as Auckland's coastline epitomises

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the calm and beauty that people come here for.

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But prices can be expensive, with this four-bed open-plan property

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going for over double the Coles' budget.

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Sharon's commute to work would take a little longer with this option,

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but Oliver and Alex would have watersport activities right on their doorstep.

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That looks very inviting.

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But what about the third option?

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Properties are a lot better value in the country and provide

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the tranquillity and beautiful landscapes that Sharon longs for.

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Homes in the Bush area of Titirangi

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are full of character, like this four-bed luxury open-plan house.

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With a village centre boasting vibrant cafes, good amenities and

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a theatre, this should be just the place for arts lover Sharon.

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Her commute to work would take just half an hour.

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There are also good transport links for Oliver and Alex to get to the city centre.

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Three very different options there, all of them life-changing. So, where did we decide to send the Coles?

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With the promise of a good mix of country living, more affordable houses, and a short commute

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to the city, we decided that the Bush area in Titirangi would be the best option for the Coles.

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We lined up a potential job for Sharon...

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-This is really good. Nice and spacious.

-..and a selection of housing options...

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Every room was big and there are all these views.

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It's just brilliant.

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..and threw them into the deep end of New Zealand life.

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But they have a tough week ahead of them as they try to make the biggest decision of their lives.

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I just realised how special the people

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in my life are and how much they mean to me.

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The Coles are finally making their trip Down Under.

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The journey from Shipley to Auckland is over 12,000 miles across three continents.

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None of them have ever been this far before but even

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after a gruelling 30-hour journey, Sharon is still raring to go.

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I'm looking forward to seeing how people work here and how it compares to what we do at home.

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I'm excited to see everything.

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I'm not sure the boys are quite as enthused as Sharon.

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I'm tired, hungry.

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Looking forward to sleeping.

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No time for rest yet. The Coles are straight off to check out their accommodation for the week.

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They'll be staying in the pretty Bush area of Titirangi in west Auckland.

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The house is an open-plan three-bedroom home

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with plenty of space for the family to roam around.

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But first, Sharon's got to get the car in.

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Woah. What are you doing?

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Is this how you come in?

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This will be great(!)

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She finally makes it and is still smiling as she's off to check out the garden.

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Oh, my goodness, just look at that view, Oliver.

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I just can't believe it's got this in the back garden.

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-This is amazing.

-Let's hope the inside is just as good.

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Oh, I love this room.

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Just look at the view.

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I mean, this is just amazing. Wherever you look, you see the sea.

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I would just be in heaven living here. I love it.

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This room... This room has a guitar in it.

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Have you seen this room?

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All the rooms are so light!

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Woah! Have you seen the bath?

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Oh, my goodness, that's tiny.

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That's not a bath, that's a shower.

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And Oliver has sorted out his mum's sleeping arrangements.

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Your mattress is ready.

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-Alex has spotted something else to whet his appetite.

-A hot tub.

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This is luxury, isn't it? I think this is now my favourite room.

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So, after the excitement of the house, how is Sharon feeling?

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When you're actually here, it all seems possible and you think, "Fantastic, I just want to be here."

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But will nerves about the week ahead get the better of her?

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I often get scared about things but I think if I'm scared, I still have to do it.

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Make things happen. That's the way I live my life. But at the same time, I think, "What am I doing?

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"What am I letting myself in for?"

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It looks like Sharon's up for the challenges ahead.

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But after the initial excitement of arriving, how are the boys really feeling?

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I prefer being in Britain just based on what I've seen so far, really.

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It's more in my comfort zone.

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I know where everything is, it's just easier.

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I can imagine coming here on holiday,

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and spending a few days here but I couldn't imagine living here yet.

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If I went to New Zealand, as well as getting a job and everything,

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I'd have to learn the lifestyle they have. It would be overwhelming

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to go through all of that.

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The boys seem to have formed a strong first impression.

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Does this mean Sharon has her work cut out to convince them about a possible move?

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Back in the UK, the Coles live in a three-bed semi-detached house in Shipley.

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It's just big enough for the three of them and ideally, they'd like a bigger third bedroom for Alex.

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Their home is situated on the Yorkshire Moors which Sharon loves,

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but she's ready for a change of scenery.

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In New Zealand, they'd be looking for a three-bedroomed house full

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of character set in the countryside but near to amenities.

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Sharon wants to be mortgage-free, and she has a budget of £185,000.

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So, can they afford it all? Or will they need to stretch their budget?

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Property one is a three-bedroomed detached house in Titirangi village.

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On the market for £173,000, it's easily within Sharon's budget.

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But will the inside be to their tastes?

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It's been decorated by its owners with a definite retro style.

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Before they get inside, Sharon's already putting

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estate agent Cheryl through her paces about the exterior cladding.

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Now, as you can see, the exterior is made of weatherboard.

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What's weatherboard? Is that made of wood?

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It's wood, weatherboard is wood. So, it's weatherproof?

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It is weatherproof. A typical material for build in Kiwi.

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So, does it need repainting every year?

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-Every year, or every couple of years, it will need a coat of paint.

-Is it like a garden shed?

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It's a lot more hard-wearing than your garden shed!

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Finally, we're in.

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What will Sharon think of the decor?

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After all, she said she wanted character.

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It's got the old Fifties style furniture, as well.

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It has. It's really in keeping with the era of the property.

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Is that an open fire?

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It's a wood burner which is very typical, again, of Kiwi properties.

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-That would be nice if it was cleaned up.

-You've also got polished timber floors as well.

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I like the floors and I like the fireplace.

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Obviously, the decor isn't my taste at all. But I can see that it suits the house.

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I don't think the wooden floorboards are going to sell it.

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Let's see if the bedrooms are more to Sharon's taste.

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So, this is one of the large double bedrooms.

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As you can see, you look straight through the window, you have the bush.

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There's not anything from 2010 in here, is there?

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It is just out of date, really, isn't it?

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There is not much room for a wardrobe in here, if you had a double bed.

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There's room at this end as well for a wardrobe, if you want to put a wardrobe in.

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That might be a bit of a stretch for Sharon.

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What about Alex's bedroom?

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It's got a wardrobe but is there enough room for a bed?

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You could get a single bed, possibly a double bed in here.

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I don't think you could get a double in.

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-If you had a double bed in here, you would have to take that out.

-Yes, you would.

-Yes.

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Still, it's bigger than Alexander's current room.

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Alex doesn't seem too impressed.

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I think it is time to see what the outside has to offer.

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This is nice, I like the open aspects.

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Good to see them is something that Sharon likes and perhaps Oliver

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will be taken by the outdoor sleeping arrangements, too.

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-Do you want to try out the hammock, then?

-Yes.

-Don't fall out.

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-Get in carefully.

-I'll just get in, Mum.

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Shall I help you? No?

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There you go. Are you in?

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How do you think that would be? Yeah?

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Yeah, I'll get back to you.

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They hardly seemed bowled over by property one, but until Sharon sits down

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and does her sums, she might not be able to afford to be so picky.

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For now, let's see what their verdict is.

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I think the inside is quirky and interesting, even though it is not furnished in my style.

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Could you see yourself living here?

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-Not really.

-I would still have a small room if we moved here.

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Everything is a bit, just small.

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That seems to be an all-round no, then. But Alex has a final thought.

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You could probably think of living here if you insulated that a bit more and just made that my room.

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-Your bedroom?

-Yeah, and just put my bed and all my stuff.

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We could turn it into a granny flat.

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No, not a granny flat, I mean a studio.

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No, all right. A teenager's pad.

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-How would that be?

-It's not a granny flat.

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Actually, it is not much smaller than the house, is it, really?

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Let's hope property two not only brings them into the 21st century,

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but can give that that larger bedroom for Alex.

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It's off to Laingholm, 15 minutes' drive away, to a three-bedroomed house on a good sized plot of land.

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It's currently on the market for £190,000.

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Welcome to 22 Weston Road.

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Thank you.

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This is bigger.

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It feels more spacious. Do they have a dishwasher?

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No, there's no dishwashers.

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Well, you've got two. Over there.

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They're standing close to the dishwasher.

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Well, the boys didn't seem too impressed by that idea

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and Sharon's noticed that property two is low-lying and set in a valley with a stream running through it.

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She has a few questions for the estate agent Edwina.

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Is there any flooding in this area?

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We have actually got flooding down the bottom of Sandy's Parade.

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There does appear to be quite a bit of flooding.

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So, would this house be at risk?

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I'd say, with the stream down here, you'd need to be mindful of that.

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That doesn't sound like good news at all.

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It's straight out onto the balcony to see where the potential flooding might be.

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As I said before, there's a stream that runs down here.

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All the rain that we've had, you can see it has certainly

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risen so that is something you need to be careful about.

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I must say, the risk of flooding is a bit of a concern.

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But I mean it's absolutely beautiful.

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The garden is well watered but will the rest of the property be enough to convince Sharon and the boys?

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-So, this is one of the bedrooms?

-It is, this is the main room.

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-It has its own en-suite.

-Well, a good start on the bedrooms. But will they all be as big?

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Let's have a look in here.

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-This is used as a study now?

-It is.

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-How many bedrooms does the property have?

-It's three bedrooms.

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-Does this include this one?

-Mm, it does.

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-It is slightly on the tinier side.

-Yeah.

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Another cupboard for poor Alex - or maybe he could have Oliver's room.

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-Oh, this is a better size.

-It certainly is.

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It's a pity we can't get three bedrooms with two...

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-The other two bedrooms this size.

-This size.

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I'm not sure it's everything they're looking for.

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What do they make of it?

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I really like the setting. I think it is gorgeous.

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I like the size of the house.

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Even though the third bedroom is small,

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it has a much more spacious feel.

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But if there was any kind of flooding risk, I wouldn't buy it.

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Oliver doesn't seem so bothered,

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and he's got more important things on his mind.

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I don't think it would be a big deal because the other house would probably get it before us,

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so we'd have some warning.

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SHE CHUCKLES

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I like the house. It's a lot more spaced out. Make a great party house, wouldn't it?

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Well, a hit with Oliver, then. But Alex might need some more convincing,

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and he's got a concern about the decor.

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It would have to change a lot before I liked it.

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Just all that blue...

0:20:450:20:48

-It's just a bit...

-HE CHUCKLES

0:20:480:20:50

..blue, yeah.

0:20:500:20:52

The risk of flooding and another small bedroom for Alex means this house isn't a winner,

0:20:530:20:58

but we've got something up our sleeve that might just fit the bill.

0:20:580:21:01

Property three is higher up and nearer to Titirangi village.

0:21:010:21:06

It's a three-bedroom upside-down house,

0:21:060:21:08

where the bedrooms are downstairs and the living space upstairs.

0:21:080:21:12

It's slightly over budget at £217,000,

0:21:120:21:16

but with a negotiable price, it might be worth it.

0:21:160:21:20

They meet up with estate agent Glen and it's straight upstairs to the living room.

0:21:200:21:24

And Sharon sees something she likes straightaway.

0:21:240:21:28

It's a beautiful view. This is about as noisy as Laingholm ever gets.

0:21:280:21:31

This must be a nice spot to sit.

0:21:310:21:33

-Yeah, that's a gin and tonic corner.

-Yeah.

0:21:330:21:35

Sharon's got a great view, but the big question hangs on Alex's bedroom.

0:21:350:21:40

Will it be big enough for a bed and Alex?

0:21:400:21:44

Which wall is six feet long?

0:21:440:21:45

So, a single bed would go down this way.

0:21:450:21:48

It would fit there, would it? How wide is it from here to the end?

0:21:480:21:52

Without a tape measure, I couldn't tell you.

0:21:520:21:54

-Would it be long enough to fit a single bed?

-No, Mum, it'd probably fit just there.

0:21:540:21:58

-I would think it would go that way.

-That's what I think - that's the longest wall.

0:21:590:22:03

I'd be happy with that room. It's just brilliant.

0:22:030:22:06

That's fantastic news.

0:22:090:22:12

Alex doesn't mind having the box room.

0:22:120:22:14

Let's see if the other rooms can suit Sharon's close inspection,

0:22:140:22:17

and unusually, they're downstairs.

0:22:170:22:20

This bed - how would this work for you?

0:22:200:22:22

It's OK but I'd prefer my windows lower down.

0:22:220:22:25

-Would you?

-Yeah.

0:22:250:22:27

-I think, cos I like...

-For the light, or...?

0:22:270:22:29

No, just because if you're actually sitting on the bed,

0:22:290:22:32

you can see above you but you can't see at eye level.

0:22:320:22:36

-Yes.

-It's OK as a second bedroom.

-Mm.

0:22:360:22:39

Let's hope the master bedroom can bring a smile to Sharon's face.

0:22:390:22:43

Oh, now, this is better.

0:22:440:22:46

-Now, this is good.

-Yeah.

0:22:460:22:47

You see, I can see outside now, which is what I was meaning.

0:22:470:22:51

-That's lovely.

-So, a good-sized master, loads of wardrobe space.

0:22:510:22:56

We might actually have a winner here,

0:22:560:22:58

but Oliver doesn't quite know what to make of the upside-down aspect.

0:22:580:23:02

I just don't know what to say.

0:23:020:23:04

I'm baffled, cos I've never seen a house like this before.

0:23:040:23:07

So, I don't know what to say.

0:23:070:23:09

Well, Sharon likes the views and Alex loved the small room,

0:23:090:23:13

so does this mean we're in business?

0:23:130:23:16

It's time to see what they really think of property three.

0:23:160:23:20

It's just, like...so...good.

0:23:200:23:23

It's just...brilliant.

0:23:230:23:25

-You were quite excited when we walked up the drive.

-Yeah.

0:23:250:23:28

He wanted to buy it before we'd even come inside. Didn't you?

0:23:280:23:31

You said, "It's awesome. Buy it, Mum, and I'll come to New Zealand now."

0:23:310:23:35

SHE CHUCKLES

0:23:350:23:36

Which is... Which is encouraging,

0:23:360:23:38

because if we find the house that's right for all of us, you know...

0:23:380:23:41

Oliver and Alex clearly have different tastes,

0:23:410:23:45

but they both seem to have found their ideal home,

0:23:450:23:48

although I'm not quite sure Sharon's been convinced.

0:23:480:23:51

So, time to vote on property.

0:23:510:23:53

I like the fact that all the houses in New Zealand are individual,

0:23:530:23:56

and that they're all in lovely settings.

0:23:560:23:59

I'm worried about the fact that they're not as solidly made as English houses.

0:23:590:24:03

Comparing them to British homes, British homes have smaller spaces.

0:24:030:24:07

In New Zealand, they're all different and they all have fantastic views.

0:24:070:24:12

I'm going to pick...

0:24:120:24:14

New Zealand.

0:24:140:24:15

New Zealand.

0:24:150:24:17

I'm going to vote, right now, with...

0:24:170:24:20

..the UK.

0:24:210:24:23

This is potentially really bad news.

0:24:230:24:27

Sharon's the driving force behind making the move to New Zealand

0:24:270:24:31

and she's already got misgivings about how life here would be.

0:24:310:24:35

Let's hope this isn't the shape of things to come.

0:24:350:24:38

There's a lot at stake to making the move to New Zealand.

0:24:410:24:46

Not only would Sharon be taking the boys away from their father,

0:24:460:24:49

she'd also be moving away from all that she's ever known.

0:24:490:24:52

So, after the disappointment of Kiwi property,

0:24:520:24:55

it's really important that she feels confident

0:24:550:24:58

that New Zealand CAN offer them all a better lifestyle.

0:24:580:25:02

They've come to the Hibiscus Coast to spend some time as a family.

0:25:020:25:05

They're going to experience an outdoor thermal spa,

0:25:050:25:08

something they wouldn't be able to do back in Shipley.

0:25:080:25:12

Straightaway, the boys are putting their mum to the test -

0:25:150:25:19

whether she'd really be willing to take the plunge Down Under.

0:25:190:25:22

I feel like I'm going to the gallows!

0:25:220:25:25

BOYS CHUCKLE

0:25:250:25:26

No, you're not pushing me!

0:25:260:25:28

You're not pushing me.

0:25:280:25:29

We're here to give you our support.

0:25:290:25:31

I can do without a challenge like this.

0:25:350:25:37

Come on, Sharon! If you're not able to attempt a water slide,

0:25:370:25:41

can you really be ready to make the move Down Under?

0:25:410:25:43

-Alex is a real gentleman, and kindly shows Sharon that it's not that scary.

-Oh, my Lord.

0:25:430:25:48

But I'm not sure she's entirely convinced.

0:25:500:25:53

It's called Bob's Mistake for a reason.

0:25:530:25:57

It means that you find out too late that you shouldn't have done it. Oh, my God.

0:25:570:26:01

Oh, my Lord.

0:26:020:26:05

HE CHUCKLES It's not funny!

0:26:050:26:07

It isn't funny, Oliver!

0:26:070:26:08

SHE SQUEALS

0:26:080:26:10

HE CHUCKLES

0:26:150:26:16

Great!

0:26:160:26:17

She's a good sport...

0:26:200:26:22

but she's not exactly doing it of her own will.

0:26:220:26:25

Go on, then, Oliver. Show your mum how it's really done.

0:26:260:26:31

Water slides are not my favourite thing.

0:26:310:26:34

They scare me to death, but I'm glad I've done it.

0:26:340:26:37

I feel proud of myself.

0:26:370:26:39

It's all about new challenges, New Zealand.

0:26:390:26:43

Can we go on some more now?

0:26:430:26:45

Perhaps I could just go for a swim now!

0:26:450:26:47

SHE CHUCKLES

0:26:470:26:49

Sharon's proven she can do it.

0:26:490:26:51

Now, it's time for something a little more relaxing.

0:26:510:26:55

But the boys are still looking for action,

0:26:550:26:58

and they've found the Black Hole.

0:26:580:27:00

I don't think Sharon would have enjoyed that one.

0:27:060:27:10

It's been a fun afternoon and Sharon was able to relax, too.

0:27:100:27:14

So, what did the boys enjoy?

0:27:140:27:16

-Watching my mum scream.

-Yeah, pushing her down the slides!

0:27:160:27:20

Coming away with them is great,

0:27:200:27:22

cos I think it helps us to get closer because we do things together and they have fun.

0:27:220:27:26

I like to see them giggling and laughing and making them happy,

0:27:270:27:31

which is why I put myself through these torturous water slides.

0:27:310:27:36

The lifestyle here is just completely different to England.

0:27:360:27:40

People's way of looking at life is different.

0:27:400:27:43

Everybody's...

0:27:440:27:47

enjoying just living.

0:27:470:27:48

And I want to have that as well.

0:27:500:27:52

But Oliver knows that there's more to this trip than just fun for his mum.

0:27:520:27:57

She needs a new start, she needs a new beginning, she needs a new life.

0:27:570:28:01

She wants... She wants, you know, a new family life.

0:28:010:28:04

Er, my parents have split up and...

0:28:040:28:08

after that, everything she knew or wanted just kind of split.

0:28:080:28:12

She's just got me and Alex and the family's a bit more separated than it was.

0:28:120:28:16

I don't think she could stand living that far away from us.

0:28:160:28:20

When my dad left, she hasn't got a partner to be with, so she's trying to hold on to us even more.

0:28:200:28:25

She's trying to hold on to the people closest to her,

0:28:250:28:27

because she thinks she'll lose them in some way.

0:28:270:28:30

It's difficult.

0:28:300:28:32

I do feel I need to move on emotionally, yeah.

0:28:320:28:37

And maybe that is one of the reasons that maybe it would be great for me,

0:28:380:28:42

because when I'm somewhere like this,

0:28:420:28:44

I feel I actually don't think about the past.

0:28:440:28:47

I just... I'm experiencing everything for the first time,

0:28:470:28:50

and it makes you feel really alive.

0:28:500:28:53

When I was younger and not in love with anyone, this is how I used to feel.

0:28:530:28:57

I used to live for now, you know,

0:28:570:28:59

and I want that feeling back again.

0:28:590:29:01

It's really tough for Sharon to decide whether to move Down Under,

0:29:010:29:05

but time spent with her boys in New Zealand fills her with optimism.

0:29:050:29:09

So, how will they vote on lifestyle?

0:29:090:29:13

There's lots of fresh air, people are outdoors and smiling.

0:29:130:29:16

I think we're all agreed...

0:29:160:29:18

New Zealand.

0:29:190:29:20

-New Zealand.

-New Zealand.

0:29:200:29:22

At home in Yorkshire, Sharon works three days a week in a hospice.

0:29:270:29:33

She earns £13,000 as a palliative-care social worker,

0:29:330:29:37

and provides patients and their families with emotional and practical support.

0:29:370:29:41

I'm just ringing to see how things are going.

0:29:410:29:44

'In palliative care, I think I've found my niche.'

0:29:440:29:48

I love it. I love the job. I love...

0:29:480:29:50

I think I do it well and that gives me a lot of satisfaction.

0:29:500:29:53

If I couldn't find a similar job,

0:29:530:29:55

that would probably be a reason not to go, for me,

0:29:550:29:59

because if I was doing a different job, I think I'd be going backwards,

0:29:590:30:02

whereas right now, I think I'm in the right place, in terms of career.

0:30:020:30:07

Work has kept Sharon going since her break-up with Richard,

0:30:090:30:13

and although she loves it, she needs a change.

0:30:130:30:17

I may not have moved away from Yorkshire but I have travelled extensively,

0:30:180:30:22

and every time I go away, I feel fully alive in a way that I don't when I'm at home.

0:30:220:30:28

At home, everything's much the same and it carries on.

0:30:280:30:31

You know, every day is the same as the one before,

0:30:310:30:34

and although there are things that I do that I love to do,

0:30:340:30:38

like going to literature festivals and travelling and visiting people,

0:30:380:30:41

the day-to-day is the same.

0:30:410:30:43

Nothing changes.

0:30:430:30:44

I'm just getting older.

0:30:440:30:46

But when I go away, I'm just me,

0:30:460:30:48

and I just feel like, er...

0:30:480:30:51

that life is more full of possibilities.

0:30:510:30:53

For Sharon to really make that break

0:30:550:30:57

and start a new life for herself and her boys, she'll need a good job.

0:30:570:31:03

She's off to the Mercy Hospice in Auckland.

0:31:030:31:05

There are only 250 palliative-care social workers in the UK.

0:31:050:31:10

In New Zealand, there are potentially fewer.

0:31:100:31:12

So, it might not be easy to find a job.

0:31:120:31:15

Meeting the head of the Family Support Team, Tim Hurley,

0:31:150:31:18

and social worker Marie, is going to be crucial for Sharon.

0:31:180:31:23

And she's straight down to business.

0:31:230:31:24

For me, I want to find out whether you think

0:31:260:31:29

-there might be possibilities about getting a post as a social worker here.

-Yes.

0:31:290:31:34

Social work in hospices is quite new here in New Zealand.

0:31:340:31:37

And my colleague who's been with the hospice here five years,

0:31:370:31:41

she was one of the first social workers to be involved, er, employed by a hospice.

0:31:410:31:46

But now, it's really a growth area

0:31:460:31:48

and I am the second social worker in this hospice,

0:31:480:31:51

and hospices all through Auckland and the rest of the country are getting social workers.

0:31:510:31:55

-That sounds like really good news.

-Yes, it is.

0:31:550:31:58

So, it is a real growth industry,

0:31:580:32:00

in terms of people seeing what contribution social workers can make.

0:32:000:32:04

Well, it seems there could be quite a lot on offer in terms of work in Sharon's field.

0:32:040:32:10

How much would they earn?

0:32:100:32:12

It's roundabout 55,000,

0:32:120:32:15

er, and that perhaps might vary a little,

0:32:150:32:19

depending on the organisation.

0:32:190:32:21

The district health boards may pay a little more than what hospices pay.

0:32:210:32:26

-That's fair enough.

-How does that compare to the UK?

0:32:260:32:28

-It sounds very similar.

-OK.

-Yeah.

0:32:280:32:31

Well, that's great news. Sharon can feel more assured about work.

0:32:310:32:36

Meanwhile, Oliver is spending the day with Auckland's coastguards.

0:32:400:32:44

He's being put to the test.

0:32:440:32:47

Oliver is just starting out in the world of work,

0:32:470:32:49

and is desperate to join the emergency services.

0:32:490:32:53

Auckland is home to New Zealand's largest port.

0:32:530:32:57

The coastguards there are one of the busiest, most exciting emergency service units in the country.

0:32:570:33:03

They have 18 full-time employees and 1,000 volunteers working for them.

0:33:030:33:08

And on a busy day, they can have up to 42 call-outs.

0:33:080:33:12

Oliver wouldn't be able to do this in Shipley,

0:33:120:33:15

so if he is looking for an adventurous career, this could be right up his street.

0:33:150:33:19

First, he's got to learn his left from his right.

0:33:190:33:22

Starboard, port, bow, stern.

0:33:220:33:24

-Starboard, port.

-Starboard.

0:33:240:33:27

-Starboard.

-Starboard, yeah.

0:33:270:33:28

-Port.

-Port.

0:33:280:33:30

-Bow.

-Bow.

0:33:300:33:31

-Stern.

-Stern. I'm going to get that mixed up, I know.

0:33:310:33:34

So, has Oliver got that?

0:33:340:33:36

It's time for his life-saving skills to be put to the test.

0:33:360:33:39

Man overboard.

0:33:390:33:41

Don't take your eyes off him.

0:33:410:33:43

He's behind the boat.

0:33:430:33:45

Starboard side!

0:33:450:33:46

Just in front of the boat, further to the right side.

0:33:460:33:49

There you go.

0:33:540:33:55

Give him a cuddle, make sure he's all right.

0:33:550:33:57

That was fun.

0:33:590:34:00

Sounds really dramatic if that was a real human being.

0:34:000:34:03

Just zooming past them, you know,

0:34:030:34:06

but, er, yeah, it looked like a good job to do, really, I think.

0:34:060:34:10

There's a lot of action involved, really.

0:34:100:34:13

Maybe Oliver's found something to convince him to make the move Down Under.

0:34:130:34:17

But there's one more test - it's his turn at the helm.

0:34:170:34:21

See you, buddy.

0:34:210:34:22

One o'clock. Coming right up on you.

0:34:260:34:29

-Straighten up.

-I want to get it on the right side, though, don't I?

0:34:290:34:32

Starboard side. That's this side.

0:34:320:34:34

He's got the buoy in sight, but he needs to be careful.

0:34:340:34:38

-Oh, I'm about to run him over.

-Where's it gone?

0:34:380:34:40

I think you killed him.

0:34:400:34:42

Oh, here it is.

0:34:420:34:44

Well done. We didn't have to call the helicopter after all.

0:34:450:34:48

So, what do our experts make of Oliver's first day at sea?

0:34:480:34:51

-For his first attempt, it was pretty good, actually.

-You've never driven a boat?

0:34:510:34:55

-No.

-That's pretty good, yeah.

0:34:550:34:57

That was fun. Can we do that again?

0:34:570:35:00

Back across town, Sharon's tour around the hospice is going well.

0:35:010:35:06

This is our chapel. Come in and have a look.

0:35:060:35:08

And there seem to be plenty of similarities between work in New Zealand and work in the UK.

0:35:080:35:13

It is a nice space, and, er,

0:35:130:35:14

often, people just wander in here and just have a bit of quiet time.

0:35:140:35:18

We've had a couple of weddings here.

0:35:180:35:20

-Yeah, we've had them in our chapel.

-Yes, yeah. Come on...

0:35:200:35:23

'Meeting Sharon, I think she's got a lovely warm personality.'

0:35:230:35:27

I think she would fit in well to the kind of people who work here.

0:35:270:35:30

'And I think that she could provide some experience and some leadership'

0:35:300:35:34

in areas we've thought perhaps we'd like to do but are not yet doing.

0:35:340:35:38

So, I think she'd be a great asset

0:35:380:35:40

to any hospice environment where she works, yeah.

0:35:400:35:43

I'll just show you in here.

0:35:430:35:44

This is one of our, er, small family rooms,

0:35:440:35:47

-where people just come and sit or spend time.

-Oh, this is nice.

0:35:470:35:50

'This hospice could be anywhere.'

0:35:500:35:52

It's the people that make the work enjoyable, as much as the job itself.

0:35:520:35:56

And they seem to be the same all round the world.

0:35:560:35:59

It was really interesting to talk to Tim and Marie,

0:35:590:36:03

and to find out that they do so many things the same way we do in England,

0:36:030:36:07

and that, you know, their approach to their work is the same,

0:36:070:36:11

their holistic philosophy's the same,

0:36:110:36:13

and what's really encouraging is that they're looking for social workers in the Auckland area.

0:36:130:36:18

Coastguard radio, coastguard radio, this is Eddie Marr, double six, double six,

0:36:190:36:24

Trillian Rescue, alpha. Copy.

0:36:240:36:26

It's been a successful day for Sharon.

0:36:270:36:30

And as the coastguards return to base, Oliver wants to know more.

0:36:300:36:34

Is it just work experience you start off to get into this sort of thing?

0:36:340:36:38

No matter what unit you go to, if you just sign up and want to be a volunteer,

0:36:380:36:42

we pretty much put you through as much training as we possibly can,

0:36:420:36:46

which gets you right through from a newbie,

0:36:460:36:49

right to our operational crew.

0:36:490:36:51

So, Oliver seems inspired,

0:36:510:36:53

but it's time for Sharon to make her vote on work.

0:36:530:36:56

This is a really difficult one for me because I work with a lovely bunch of people in the UK.

0:36:560:37:01

Er, I love them to bits and it would be a wrench to leave them,

0:37:010:37:04

but today I felt energised and excited, so I'm going to vote for...

0:37:040:37:10

..New Zealand.

0:37:110:37:14

Moving to New Zealand involves massive financial, as well as emotional, decisions.

0:37:170:37:24

The Coles need to take into account the cost of living in Auckland,

0:37:240:37:27

as well as what they'd make on their UK home.

0:37:270:37:31

The Coles' house is a three-bedroom property,

0:37:310:37:34

which Sharon bought with husband Richard when the boys were little.

0:37:340:37:38

She now owns it outright and hopes it's worth £185,000.

0:37:380:37:43

We sent in two estate agents to give her their valuations.

0:37:430:37:46

Fairly typical sort of size, for a semi-detached of this era.

0:37:550:37:59

Nice fireplace.

0:37:590:38:01

Really nice room, very light, got some of the original stained glass.

0:38:030:38:07

Some people might feel that they would like to make it more contemporary,

0:38:070:38:11

even knock through to the kitchen.

0:38:110:38:13

'Right.'

0:38:170:38:18

The size of the kitchen, obviously, doesn't really fit with modern living.

0:38:180:38:23

Some people would choose to knock through, now,

0:38:230:38:26

and make that really nice - one big dining kitchen.

0:38:260:38:29

So, let's see what's out here.

0:38:290:38:31

Oh, gosh, the porch is a mess.

0:38:310:38:34

We have what was originally a sun room.

0:38:340:38:37

However, it is being used at the moment as a general storage space.

0:38:370:38:41

So, I would have to say that,

0:38:410:38:43

in order to really sell this as a feature,

0:38:430:38:46

it would need to be emptied.

0:38:460:38:47

Ah, this is a small room.

0:38:500:38:52

This will put off some potential buyers. Yeah, bit of a stumbling block here, really.

0:38:520:38:56

It could be an office, though.

0:38:560:38:58

Mm, a complete mismatch.

0:39:000:39:01

A boy's room with a girl's wallpaper.

0:39:010:39:04

-What?

-I'm sure I remember this paper.

0:39:040:39:06

I think we had some of this in our house in Bradford in the early '80s.

0:39:060:39:10

No, it wasn't.

0:39:100:39:11

It was 1991 when I first put that paper in the old house.

0:39:110:39:15

This is a better room - nice size.

0:39:160:39:19

Nice views out of the window. I think that certainly is a nice feature.

0:39:190:39:24

It's nice to see that they have re-done the bathroom.

0:39:260:39:31

And it's got all the right features. Bath, good-sized shower cubicle with a rain head, fully tiled.

0:39:310:39:37

Yes, very nice. This is a good selling feature.

0:39:370:39:40

I'm glad she likes the bathroom - I chose that.

0:39:400:39:42

You've got a house here which is really going to appeal to families.

0:39:420:39:45

So, families will look at it, decide, perhaps, to change it rather.

0:39:450:39:49

The property does require some decorative improvement in places,

0:39:490:39:53

and also, the third bedroom is very, very small.

0:39:530:39:56

I think that might put off some buyers.

0:39:560:39:58

If the vendor wants a quick sale, I'd say you're probably more likely

0:39:580:40:03

to have to put it on at 160, 165, and probably have to come down

0:40:030:40:07

from that too because people are expecting you to allow for the work that needs doing to modernise it.

0:40:070:40:14

For a quick sale, I would suggest £160,000.

0:40:140:40:17

At that level, I do feel there will be a good level of interest.

0:40:170:40:21

It's dropped a lot then.

0:40:210:40:23

I thought it was worth more than that.

0:40:230:40:25

I expected that it would probably be about 185 at least.

0:40:250:40:30

But I don't understand what needs modernising.

0:40:300:40:32

I've done the bathroom, the kitchen, I've put in a fireplace in the living room,

0:40:320:40:36

I've done loads to it, really.

0:40:360:40:38

So I'm really surprised that she thinks it needs work.

0:40:380:40:42

Well, Sharon wasn't too pleased with that but she can still be mortgage free.

0:40:420:40:48

It will depend whether they can afford to live off her salary.

0:40:480:40:51

So, we've prepared a comparison of Sharon's UK and New Zealand expenses

0:40:510:40:55

to see if she can afford a life Down Under.

0:40:550:40:57

Oh, my goodness!

0:40:570:40:59

At first glance, this is really worrying - to see that my food bill would double.

0:40:590:41:05

Let me see. Goodness me, organic chicken,

0:41:050:41:08

£12.35 in New Zealand and only £7.32 in England.

0:41:080:41:13

The organic steak is twice as expensive in New Zealand.

0:41:130:41:17

Apples are about £1 a week more.

0:41:170:41:20

Carrots, twice as much, almost.

0:41:200:41:24

This is a massive difference.

0:41:250:41:27

I'm just staggered.

0:41:270:41:29

Not a great start.

0:41:290:41:31

How will other expenses fair?

0:41:310:41:33

New Zealand. This is good news - gas and electric is about half the price it is in England, which is great.

0:41:330:41:40

And council tax is less.

0:41:400:41:42

Petrol is a lot cheaper.

0:41:420:41:44

So, maybe, actually, it might balance out.

0:41:440:41:47

But there are some hidden costs.

0:41:470:41:50

Adults pay up to £25 per GP visit.

0:41:500:41:54

Right. And Alexander will cost £19 a visit.

0:41:540:41:58

We'll just have to stay healthy, and keep eating the organic food,

0:41:580:42:02

and we won't need to go to the GP!

0:42:020:42:05

Gym membership would cost me £64 a month instead of £45.

0:42:050:42:11

I'd be able to walk a lot more here, wouldn't I?

0:42:110:42:15

I just have to do my exercise outside and swim in my friends' pools instead of in the gym.

0:42:150:42:22

Sharon would earn a higher salary in New Zealand but would it be enough to make the move affordable?

0:42:220:42:28

Without the gym membership, it's going to cost me an extra £54 a month.

0:42:280:42:32

So I suppose you've got to offset one against the other, really,

0:42:320:42:37

and work out what you're willing to compromise on.

0:42:370:42:39

For me, I wouldn't compromise on my food.

0:42:390:42:42

Maybe I could work a couple of extra hours a month to make that difference up.

0:42:420:42:47

£54 a month isn't too big a difference, really.

0:42:470:42:50

So, how will Sharon vote on the cost of living?

0:42:500:42:54

Taking into account that food is far more expensive here,

0:42:540:42:58

which is a big shock, but gas and electric is cheaper

0:42:580:43:03

and I won't need to go to the gym,

0:43:030:43:05

I will vote for...

0:43:050:43:07

New Zealand.

0:43:070:43:09

Back in the UK, Sharon's friends are a huge part of her life.

0:43:150:43:19

And since the separation from Richard,

0:43:190:43:22

they've played an even bigger role, supporting her emotionally through some tough times.

0:43:220:43:28

Thinking about making the move Down Under and leaving them behind won't be an easy decision.

0:43:280:43:34

So, we've arranged for Sharon to meet up with local social group

0:43:340:43:37

in the Auckland suburb of Devonport.

0:43:370:43:40

-Hello, Sharon, I'm Liz.

-Hi, Liz.

0:43:410:43:43

-And this is Andre, Heather, Kerry, Bob, Paul, Gwyneth.

-Hello. Hi, everyone.

0:43:430:43:51

Without a partner by your side, it can be daunting meeting a group of new people.

0:43:510:43:55

But Sharon's made a connection with Gwyneth, and it even turns out that she's visited Sharon's home town.

0:43:550:44:01

-I did a big tour over there.

-Where did you go?

0:44:010:44:05

Yorkshire, Bradford.

0:44:050:44:07

Oh, Bradford! I live in Bradford!

0:44:070:44:09

It's a small world.

0:44:090:44:11

I loved it there. I loved the countryside.

0:44:110:44:14

-If you ever come to England, you can stay with me.

-Well, I'd love to.

-Right, what are we going to have?

0:44:140:44:19

Well, I wonder what the fish of the day will be?

0:44:190:44:22

Would you like to go and find out, Kerry?

0:44:220:44:25

-Ah, yeah.

-I've nominated him!

0:44:250:44:27

Across town, the boys are happily chilling out.

0:44:320:44:35

They seem pleased that Mum is making new friends, but they're not sure what to make of everything.

0:44:350:44:40

Yeah, Mum's making friends, yeah, that's a good sign.

0:44:400:44:44

Erm, obviously, she's got to have good relationships here, to get to know people.

0:44:440:44:49

It's a big part of life.

0:44:490:44:51

It's the main part of life, really.

0:44:510:44:54

When she gets back, she'll have all these things that she'll knows

0:44:540:44:57

she's leaving behind because that's kind of gone from her mind this week.

0:44:570:45:01

All she's done is she's got baffled by what's here,

0:45:010:45:03

and completely forgotten about what the consequences of coming here are going to be.

0:45:030:45:08

I don't like, really, being taken out of my comfort zone because

0:45:080:45:14

I know everything in England and I know where everything is.

0:45:140:45:17

Now I'm here and I've spent almost a week here,

0:45:170:45:20

it's a lot more than I expected.

0:45:200:45:23

I'm not...

0:45:230:45:25

completely either at the moment.

0:45:250:45:29

If she wants to move on, she wants to drag us with her.

0:45:290:45:32

So, it's...

0:45:320:45:35

it's got to be our decision as well if she's got to move.

0:45:350:45:38

Erm, so that's going to make things twice as hard as well.

0:45:380:45:42

The boys really aren't convinced, and unless Sharon can feel

0:45:420:45:46

they'll be happy to make the move, will she really be able to do it?

0:45:460:45:51

But for now, Sharon is enjoying time with her new friends

0:45:520:45:56

and is even opening up to them about her feelings on making the move.

0:45:560:46:01

Sometimes it's a really scary idea, the thought of travelling such a long way from home.

0:46:010:46:06

And the only way to find out is actually to come here and to get to know people.

0:46:060:46:10

And I think people are the same wherever you are.

0:46:100:46:12

-If you've got good friends, that feels like home, doesn't it?

-That's exactly it.

0:46:120:46:16

Most of our parents did the same journey as you're talking about.

0:46:160:46:20

-So, people feel an affinity with England, don't they?

-Yes.

0:46:200:46:23

And that makes you feel it would be a place where you felt comfortable.

0:46:230:46:26

Everyone's here.

0:46:260:46:27

-Whanau.

-What does that mean?

0:46:270:46:30

Whanau is Maori for family.

0:46:300:46:32

-The Mouldy?

-Maori!

0:46:320:46:34

-Mouldy?

-Indigenous.

-Maori!

0:46:340:46:37

Oh, the Maori! You call them Mouldy?!

0:46:370:46:39

-You gotta speak the lingo!

-Why do you call them Mouldy?

0:46:390:46:42

Mao-ri!

0:46:420:46:44

Oh, the Maori!

0:46:440:46:46

That's the correct pronunciation.

0:46:460:46:49

It's wonderful. It opens up your world when you meet new people.

0:46:490:46:54

And I think it's good if you can find even one person that you can get along with

0:46:540:46:58

because you realise that wherever you are, there are people that you can meet and become friends with.

0:46:580:47:05

And that makes all the difference because wherever your friends are is where home is, for me.

0:47:050:47:10

But how will Sharon vote?

0:47:100:47:12

Friends are really important to me. I have wonderful friends in England.

0:47:120:47:16

But friends are friends wherever you are

0:47:160:47:18

and the people here are lovely, so I'm going to vote for...

0:47:180:47:23

New Zealand.

0:47:230:47:25

The Coles have really embraced their week in Auckland.

0:47:290:47:33

But how will they respond to hearing messages from friends and family?

0:47:330:47:38

-ALL: Hi, Sharon.

-Hello, Sharon.

0:47:410:47:43

-ALL: Hi, Alex.

-Hi, Alex.

0:47:430:47:46

She's very kind, she's very caring.

0:47:460:47:49

She's a fabulous mother, and she's a great friend.

0:47:490:47:52

I can't speak more highly of her because she's coped with everything.

0:47:520:47:58

She really has. The things that she's been through in her life.

0:47:580:48:01

She's unbelievable, really.

0:48:010:48:03

It's untrue. I just love her to bits.

0:48:030:48:07

She's constantly cheerful and lifts the mood if you're feeling down.

0:48:080:48:14

That's really important in our line of work.

0:48:140:48:17

Alex is probably the craziest guy I've ever met. And the awesomest.

0:48:170:48:21

He's really nice, and he's kind, and he's funny.

0:48:210:48:25

A great friend.

0:48:250:48:26

Epic, to use one of his words.

0:48:260:48:29

Aw!

0:48:290:48:31

I suppose it's somebody being there. It's Sharon's loyalty for me.

0:48:310:48:35

I would miss, I don't know, the buzz from physically being in the same room as Sharon.

0:48:350:48:41

Yeah, it will be very hard to adjust, it'll be hard to not have her here.

0:48:410:48:45

And the fact that she's going so far away is going to be odd.

0:48:450:48:49

She's a really, really good pal. I'll miss her desperately.

0:48:490:48:53

I would really miss him. It wouldn't be the same without him.

0:48:540:49:00

We'd have one less friend and all our other friends would be really upset as well.

0:49:000:49:05

Um, I would not want her to go, I'll be honest.

0:49:050:49:09

But that's purely being selfish.

0:49:090:49:10

I like things to stay as they are and I'd like Sharon to stay here, to be honest.

0:49:100:49:14

The time's probably right for her.

0:49:140:49:16

She's had quite a lot of sadness in her life, these past few years.

0:49:160:49:20

And I think she's now perhaps getting to a point where she can turn her life around.

0:49:200:49:26

She's a real go-getting girl.

0:49:260:49:29

If there's something that she chooses to do, she will go ahead and do it.

0:49:290:49:32

I think she's had things in her life and I think she deserves

0:49:320:49:38

this chance for her and her boys, if it's the right thing for her.

0:49:380:49:42

We're all missing you here.

0:49:420:49:44

-It's not the same without you.

-Please come back soon.

0:49:440:49:47

I do hope that you're having a good time. I always want you to have a good time.

0:49:470:49:51

But I am being selfish and I want you to come back to me.

0:49:510:49:55

I hope it's an adventure for you but one you'd like to return from.

0:49:550:49:59

Just know that I love you and I'm going to miss you. Bye, Sharon.

0:50:030:50:07

Whatever you want to do, darling, we'll back you up.

0:50:070:50:11

You don't have to feel you're on your own if you get stuck or anything. We're always here.

0:50:110:50:16

Er, but I can't imagine that you ever would need any help because

0:50:160:50:20

you're so competent, and you just get on with life,

0:50:200:50:24

and everything will work out fine for you.

0:50:240:50:28

I'll miss you if you do. Bye.

0:50:280:50:32

Oh, dear.

0:50:340:50:36

I just realised how special the people in my life are...

0:50:420:50:46

..and how much they mean to me.

0:50:470:50:50

And it's, it's...

0:50:500:50:52

wonderful to hear that they think the same about me.

0:50:520:50:55

I'm thinking that...

0:50:550:50:58

I want to be in two places!

0:50:580:51:01

I want to be here for the boys, I think it would be really good for them.

0:51:010:51:06

I just hope that if we do come here, that I can afford to go back as much as possible,

0:51:090:51:14

and keep those relationships going

0:51:140:51:18

because the bonds are really strong now.

0:51:180:51:20

And, you know...

0:51:200:51:22

..it's relationships that matter to me more than anything.

0:51:240:51:28

The thought of taking the boys away from their father continues to haunt Sharon.

0:51:280:51:34

I can't be everything to them.

0:51:340:51:36

I want to be, I'd love to be but they need a father as well as a mother.

0:51:360:51:41

I've always believed that both parents are equally important

0:51:410:51:44

and especially for boys, I'd think, "Have I taken away something really important in their lives?"

0:51:440:51:49

So, it's such a big decision.

0:51:490:51:52

But I know that if we do it, we've got to do it in the next two years

0:51:520:51:55

because otherwise, they'll be doing things over in the UK,

0:51:550:52:00

and it won't be possible for us all to get a visa and come here.

0:52:000:52:04

So, it's a real dilemma, it really is.

0:52:040:52:07

Alex's doubts have been rekindled after seeing his friends.

0:52:070:52:11

Like, watching that, I don't really want to go as much.

0:52:110:52:15

Like, I'd rather just stay in England because of all my friends and everything.

0:52:150:52:21

But yet, this week, you've really loved it.

0:52:210:52:24

I know but I don't really want to leave England.

0:52:240:52:28

Yeah.

0:52:300:52:31

What about you, Oliver?

0:52:310:52:34

I'd be fine coming here.

0:52:340:52:36

I think you can see a lot of positives for you, can't you?

0:52:360:52:40

Yeah. Missing Dad probably wouldn't bother me too much.

0:52:400:52:44

Cos he's left me at too early an age for me to really care, so...

0:52:440:52:49

But he still cares about you.

0:52:510:52:53

Yeah.

0:52:530:52:55

Leaving friends and family behind is always going to be the hardest part,

0:52:590:53:05

and Oliver's reaction about his dad doesn't come as a surprise to Sharon, but it cuts the deepest.

0:53:050:53:12

When Oliver's dad left, when he was 11, Oliver was traumatised,

0:53:120:53:16

Oliver was really distressed for a long, long time.

0:53:160:53:21

And I think Oliver really tried everything he could to persuade his father to come back

0:53:210:53:27

and to be there for him, and he felt he wasn't. So...

0:53:270:53:32

Erm...

0:53:370:53:39

He feels like his dad's not there for him, so...

0:53:390:53:43

he's not really... He wants to give this strong, tough exterior

0:53:430:53:50

that says he doesn't care, but I know deep down he does.

0:53:500:53:53

And he's looking... He's looking for what he's lost.

0:53:530:53:58

That's why he thinks if he comes here and makes some good friends,

0:53:580:54:02

maybe he'll find what he's missing from his dad.

0:54:020:54:05

And do you think that? What do you think?

0:54:050:54:08

I think maybe he would.

0:54:080:54:11

It's also a question of what Sharon feels she needs at this stage in her life, too.

0:54:110:54:16

It's almost like I'm stuck in the past.

0:54:160:54:20

The house is the same house that I've always lived in throughout my married life,

0:54:200:54:25

so it's full of memories, sad memories, really, more than happy ones.

0:54:250:54:29

And it's taken me a long time to come to terms with what happened.

0:54:290:54:34

He was the love of my life and for a long time, I hoped he would come back.

0:54:340:54:38

As time has gone on, I've realised that's not going to happen.

0:54:380:54:42

I feel braver and stronger.

0:54:420:54:45

I've changed in the last few years and now,

0:54:450:54:48

I think I've reached a stage where I have to look to the future

0:54:480:54:52

and think, maybe this is what's right for all of us now.

0:54:520:54:55

For Alex, though, he feels he has more to leave behind

0:54:550:54:59

and it's almost impossible for Sharon to know what's best for them all.

0:54:590:55:03

It would be really hard if one wants to go and one wants to stay.

0:55:030:55:07

And I don't think they're quite ready to be independent. That will be a really tough one.

0:55:070:55:13

It's the end of their week-long experiment in New Zealand.

0:55:170:55:21

It's been full of new experiences and they've had the opportunity to

0:55:210:55:26

spend quality time together as a family.

0:55:260:55:29

Sharon's had the chance to discover

0:55:310:55:34

that New Zealand could provide her with a new beginning.

0:55:340:55:37

It's time for the final vote.

0:55:390:55:42

Will Oliver and Alex give the answer Sharon is hoping for?

0:55:420:55:46

New Zealand.

0:55:480:55:50

New Zealand.

0:55:510:55:53

England.

0:55:550:55:57

I know two of us have voted for New Zealand and Alexander, you voted for the UK,

0:56:020:56:06

but we're going to go home and talk about it some more,

0:56:060:56:10

look at what courses are here for Alexander when he goes to university

0:56:100:56:13

and I think when that time comes, it will be right for us all.

0:56:130:56:16

A split decision.

0:56:210:56:22

The Coles have had a great time in Auckland

0:56:220:56:25

and love what the country has to offer

0:56:250:56:27

in terms of lifestyle and job prospects.

0:56:270:56:31

Perhaps Alex will change his mind.

0:56:310:56:34

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:56:490:56:51

E-mail [email protected]

0:56:510:56:52

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