Unrelated

This film contains strong language

CAR DOORS SLAM SHUT

CAR DOOR SLAMS SHUT

CAR DOOR SLAMS SHUT

PEOPLE SPEAKING LOUDLY

PEOPLE LAUGH AND CHATTER

< Guys, guys. Guys.

Guys.

-WOMAN:

-It's all right. It's Anna. It's Anna. Yeah.

-Anna. Hi. How was your journey?

-Hi, Badge.

-It was fine, thanks.

-I thought you were coming with Alex.

At the last minute he got some work, so...

-Hi, Jack.

-Hi, Anna.

-Mum retired.

-Yeah, Mum's tired so Sis'll show you your room.

-She's really tired.

-Sure, don't worry. I'm tired, too.

Can I take your bag for you? Are you all right with that?

It's OK. I'm OK with it, thanks.

MEN CHATTER, WHOOP AND LAUGH

-MAN OUTSIDE:

-Have some of this!

TALKING LOUDLY AND LAUGHING

DOOR CLICKS SHUT

-MAID:

-Buongiorno!

-Buongiorno.

MAID SPEAKS ITALIAN

Uh, no, um... SPEAKS ITALIAN

How have you been?

Oh, darling. So lovely to see you.

-You're all wet.

-Sorry, I went for a run up the hill. I'm sorry.

-You're settling.

-I know, I know.

-Good.

-Oh, how was your flight?

-Oh, it was fine, thanks.

-Sorry I didn't see you last night.

-Don't worry about that.

-So tired.

MEN SPEAK OUTSIDE

-All at their best weight. Oh, hello.

-Hi.

-Hello.

-Have you met yet?

-We almost met this morning. George.

-Oh, hello.

-Hello, darling, you all right?

Ooh. Where's Alex?

I'm really sorry. At the last moment he had work and couldn't make it.

-Oh.

-I would have called but it all happened really quickly.

He's disappointed he couldn't come.

-I'm sorry. I would've loved to have seen him.

-It's just me. I'm sorry.

-In that case...

-HE SPEAKS ITALIAN

Darling. Aww.

-Anna, this is Archie.

-Hello, Archie.

-This is Anna.

Old friend of mine from London. You know, Archie... Look at him.

He's grown another ten inches since the last time you saw him.

Oakley, this is Anna.

My cousin George's son.

PHONE RINGS IN BAG

Alex.

Hello, Alex.

Are you OK?

I'm sorry about some of the things I said.

All I said was I wanted to be alone for a bit.

It isn't as simple as that.

I'm going to go. OK.

Bye.

-Piglet? GROUP:

-No!

Well, that's a relief. Um...

-Kanga. Tigger. GROUP:

-No!

-I'd like to be Tigger.

-Oh, darling, I'm Tigger.

I want to be Tigger. Umm...oh, Ee...

Eeyore.

-Yes!

-Well done. Very good.

Very impressive.

Excellent!

May I? So weird, you think you're being sort of restrictive.

-I know! I mean...

-Yeah.

-Excellent. You got that very quickly.

-Another one?

-Do I get a prize?

Your prize is to pour yourself a glass of wine.

-Do you want another glass?

-Um...

-What are you drinking?

I don't know, I think I might go to bed, actually.

-The night is...

-We'll do another round.

Is she enjoying herself?

Yeah. It's good for him to have a bit of time.

Come on.

Good night, sweetie. Night, night.

Good night, love. See you tomorrow.

DOORS SLAM

VOICES CHATTER

LOUD THUMPING

CHATTERING

FURNITURE DRAGGED ACROSS FLOOR

Don't be long.

WOMAN SPEAKS ITALIAN

ANNA SPEAKS ITALIAN

WOMAN SPEAKS ITALIAN

ANNA SPEAKS ITALIAN

-Chuck it in!

-What about Sambuca?

We got it. Let's go, let's go, let's go. And they're off.

Ooooh!

Oy! You can't get away like that!

Oooo-whee!

We had a few beers and we had the bottles

and we went across the palazzo, went up to the big doors.

We're, like, knocking on them, like, "Is anyone in there? Is anyone in?"

And, we didn't hear anything,

-so we pissed up against the door.

-That was fucking stupid.

No!

And then some twat must have spoken to someone

because we were, like, chased by the Italian police up this alley.

This is when they lost the two of us.

Me and Archie were still stuck in the camper.

You guys ran off.

That's such bollocks.

-You were fucking useless.

-Guys...

-And the carabinieri were chasing us up this alley.

-Jack.

-They were...had up against...

-Jack.

Anna, just don't tell the olds, yeah?

-Don't worry, of course I won't tell.

-Cool.

I'm not really very sure of myself and I don't like big spaces.

In fact, I have my own home. What I like doing is crawling into holes away from...

That's Archie, isn't it? I thought you were... Do the animal now.

OK, that's really funny.

Are you a beetle, darling? Are you a beetle >

No. I am a mouse.

Oh, he's a little mouse. >

< Last two?

-Me?

-Anna, do you want a cigarette?

< Oh, no. She doesn't smoke.

In fact, I've got a very good story about Anna and smoking.

-Can I tell it, Anna?

-< Really?

-Yes. School. Don't you remember?

-Well, I will.

< Oh, it was wonderful. No-one ever asked Anna to come

because, well, people didn't ask you to join in for those sort of things, did they?

And I remember thinking, "Oh, let's ask Anna"

and I said, "Oh, Anna, come with us."

"We're all going down behind the bike sheds." And down she came

and all the cigarettes came out and she started coughing so loudly

that the teachers heard us and came and found us

because she was absolutely coughing her lungs out.

So I think from that moment on, Anna has never smoked.

Don't you remember?

-< GEORGE:

-How many do you smoke a day?

Oh, um...

20 or 30? I'd say it was none of your business, Dad.

-Oh!

-It's not.

That's a bit much, isn't it?

Depends how many we can get in...in Monteroni.

Depends how many are Italian, actually.

It's random, based on our Italian.

Em...er...whoever has the lowest card has to dress up in drag.

Yeah, come on, Badge.

What about girls?

Yeah, that'd be lame, you'd just be in like a shirt and stuff.

Do you think the boys are a little reluctant here?

-Yeah.

-Maybe just a little bit scared?

Yeah, yeah.

Fine, I'll dress up in drag, it's fine.

-3, 2, 1, go. Ten.

-Queen.

-Queen.

They're all quite high.

Jack, eight...

No, I am not, I am not dressing up.

Go and get yourself dressed.

No way, no way, I'm not going in drag...

Shhh!

I'm not going in drag!

Shhh!

Come on!

Shhh!

VOICES COMING CLOSER

Here he comes!

Oh, my God!

HE LAUGHS

Archie!

You look absolutely amazing!

This is ridiculous.

-I've got a hard-on!

-Shut up, shut up.

I need a cigarette.

Have one, here you go.

-Ciao, buongiorno.

-Ciao.

Hi, Archie.

Morning.

How are you?

Not too bad, thank you.

Good.

Ciao.

Hello, hi, Badge.

Morning.

Fragile this morning, aren't we?

Hi, Jack.

Morning, everybody.

I had a really weird, weird dream.

Maybe something to do with the antics.

Oh, the antics were good as well, but...

-He makes all these dreams up, you know, don't you?

-No, no, no...

-They're bollocks.

-My dream was not a cross-dressing dream...

He's always done this, comes down, "I dreamt this, I dreamt that."

OK, this time it's real.

I became world champion at tiddlywinks,

and in the European Championships I also won the next year.

I played this Japanese guy in the final,

and it was like a David-and-Goliath struggle...

Buongiorno, Elisabetta.

Every time I did a move, everyone was like, "Wow, he's amazing."

Bollocks, I don't believe this was in your dream.

It was in this huge arena with hundreds of thousands of people watching.

Um, anyone know...

Yeah, he's a friend of mine, he's coming up.

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's...yeah.

You haven't met Anna, have you, Elisabetta?

Hello, hi.

An old schoolfriend of Verena's.

Elisabetta's a counsellor, and our neighbour.

Verena's still sleeping off the effects of last night.

Did we disturb you?

Not at all.

Bye.

See you later.

MUSIC: "Set You Free" by N-Trance

Yeaaaaah!

Badge, come on, we're going.

ENGINE REVVING WILDLY

-No, no, no, listen to me...

-No, no, no, I'll find my own way.

-Listen to me, no, listen to me...

-We'll follow you or...

-It's about six miles...

-It's going to be fine, thanks, Dad.

Anna, come with us.

No, no, I think you should come with us, it doesn't make sense...

If you get lost, on your own head be it.

Come with us, it will be much cooler in our car.

-There's no air-con in there.

-Sorry, Arch.

See you there.

Yes, come with us.

Come on, jump in.

Very good hat, Anna. Like it.

THEY TALK INAUDIBLY

It's like the bottom of the river. It's like the bottom of the river.

Badge is being a spoilsport, Badge is being a spoilsport.

LAUGHTER

No, Charlie!

SHOUTING AND LAUGHTER

Coming!

Ha, ha, ha!

Get 'em! Get Charlie off me!

No, Charlie, don't!

LAUGHTER

OK!

Still the same...

Ah, none on me!

Ha, ha, ha!

LAUGHTER IN BACKGROUND

BANGING

-Have you brown sugar?

-Brown sugar, that's what we need.

All right, OK, OK, OK. Where's John?

-Search for the camera.

-Try the back.

-There we go!

Found some.

This is a nightmare!

-Ooh!

-Arch.

-Keep your hair out.

-Watch out, she'll jump you.

-Full of infinite subtlety.

-He's got them.

Very good.

Very good. Father, son, getting it right.

LAUGHTER

-Very good.

-Fancy a whisky, George?

-Yes.

Yes, I'll have one of those, Arch. Thank you.

The big boys off the whisky. Arr!

Come on. Let's keep it going.

-Verena?

-Mmm?

-Are you happy to play without your fellow olds?

No, I think I might go and join them for a little...

-a little nightcap.

-Probably for the best, very good.

-I'll see you later.

-Good night.

-Come on, let's think of something good.

-Psychiatrist's chair again?

-No, no, no, let's whack some tunes on.

-OK, well whack them on loud.

-OK, yes. Of course.

-Screw your health.

Let's pump it.

-Where it is it?

-It's in my room.

LOUD MUSIC

-Woo!

-Yes!

Whoa!

SCREAMING

Oh, my God!

-Anna!

-That is my meaning!

-Badge wants to see me naked, everybody.

-No!

Out of the pool.

-He does this every night.

-It's different though, isn't it?

-Anna...

-SHE LAUGHS

-Oh, my God.

-I'm really sorry about that.

Now I've lost all respect for you.

Passes orange and now this.

Go on! Go on!

He decided to do it. It's a small but important difference.

-Feel better?

-Yeah.

-And then there was one! Ha, ha, ha!

-Exactly.

Yeah.

-Got to be in it to win it.

-Yes.

-You've got to shoot to score.

Damn right.

Oh, that's good, that...

This feels like another stake-out, doesn't it?

-Ha, ha, ha!

-Last stand. Exactly.

I'm getting cold.

-Yeah.

-It was so impromptu.

Look at this. LAUGHTER

Careful you don't tread on any toads on your way in.

What, you're still looking?!

-I'll just be a minute.

-See you.

-Bye.

You guys are such perverts.

SHOWER STARTS

There you go.

-Cigarette?

-No.

Sure?

OK.

-There you go.

-Bad influence, Son.

-Cheers.

-What's with the bonding?

-Cheers.

-Good times had by all.

-What is Dad doing?

-Charlie was funny.

It was embarrassing.

Did anyone ever play the ash game, or is that just me?

No, Archie. I think that's just you, actually.

Actually, I have played the game,

to come to Archie's defence, for once.

-Yes?

-And it's rubbish...

-LAUGHTER

-..an Archie classic.

-Look, it depends who you're playing it with.

You liked psychiatrist chat, come on. You liked it.

They're not some weird species.

Well, you know, Alex, you can be so chippy.

Well...

Look...

Being here is good for me.

-If you asked me last time you said if I had a cigarette...

-You smoked mine!

ARGUING CONTINUES

Thanks a lot. So you can't have fun with me and Charlie and George?

You're only our oldest friend.

Well, MY oldest friend, anyway.

-Don't be silly.

-All the bother I went to to get your ticket sorted, you know...

I'm not being silly.

It's just that things have been a bit difficult at home.

You know, it's just nice just to...

What's the matter with... You know, there's always something wrong.

I asked you what was going on with Alex, you haven't told me anything.

You don't sit up and talk to me, you don't want to come in the car with me. I...

That is so mad!

Ohhh!

-With the mid black, maybe with a colour.

-Uh-huh.

-What size?

-Um, I only know my English size.

-In English?

-36B.

-Yes.

And I have panty or string. What do you prefer?

Um, I think panty.

-Medium. Huh?

-Yeah.

-That looks great. Can I try them on?

-I have...

I don't remember in English.

-Um, oh, very nice!

-Will you wear this?

Mmm, I think I'll stick with these, thank you.

CHURCH BELLS TOLL

THEY LAUGH, WHOOP AND CHEER

-Did the pizza, I did the drinks...

-You got ONE pizza?

-The queue, the queue was...

-Don't give it to them, give it to us. Oi, Dad!

I know that I want another beer. I know "tanga" is "thong" in Italian.

-A girl to take your breath away and...

-Yeah, but that's the point.

-And then five minutes!

-Like, so...

-So you let them walk on. What's the difference?

And, um, Italian bella walks past, she's amazing.

Ten minutes later another one walks past.

And you're asking me to make a promise to one of them.

No, but you haven't gone off with either of them, have you?

I just think men and women are always bound to be unfaithful.

-I really think that.

-You're probably right.

-That doesn't mean to say...

-So why get married?

It's more, it's about more than mere sexual fidelity.

It's about making a bond with somebody and...

Your mum and dad, maybe they're not getting on that well now,

but perhaps in 20 years' time, if they're still together,

then they might, there's still something going between them, they still have friendship.

It might suddenly come good.

And that's what you're working on with your husband, is it?

20 years' time, dressing gown and slippers. Anna and Alex.

I find it difficult. I can't see that far ahead.

Charlie and Brina seem happy, though, I think.

They've only been together six years, haven't they?

Six years is a fucking long time.

Anyway, it's not about who's sleeping together.

-It's about living together.

-That has to be part of it.

When you meet someone, that's the first thing you think.

-If the sex isn't there, you're dead in the water.

-True...

Doesn't matter if you like them, if you...if they make you feel good

or you like their personality or if they make you laugh.

If the sex isn't good, it's, it's for shit. What are you in it for?

-It dies. Surely.

-Yeah, no, I agree with you. I agree with you.

So... So, was it ever good?

-Come on, it's obviously bad.

-You're asking me these questions!

I'm just interested. It's obviously bad.

Whatever it... Oh!

Whatever sex is like at the beginning,

after 12 years, it's going to change, I think.

-Well, the people I've talked to anyway. I'm not...

-Yeah.

I mean, long-term relationships are not easy. They're a challenge.

What about kids?

Well, we don't have them.

Any reason? What, does he not want them or something?

Is he one of those...

One of those people who's just not interested in...

No.

How's that make you feel? Did you want them?

Sorry.

Um...

Have a sip of beer. Sorry, shouldn't have asked.

No, that's OK.

Between the two of you.

Hmph. What, and our sex life isn't?

I don't know, I'm just curious.

< Seriously, I just lost it.

Were these people who survived, people who died?

I have no idea.

People obviously have an enormous belief in something beyond here,

something completely irrational.

-Do you have any? Do you have any irrational beliefs?

-Hmm, a few.

Do you? That surprises me.

I thought you were going to answer a firm negative to that one.

No. One or two. I found a very good restaurant.

-I'll take you there one evening, yeah? Deal? Good.

-Yes, thank you.

Hmm. So what else did you get up to?

I just wandered around, really.

-It's a great city, though.

-It is.

Thomas, hello. Would you like one?

I'd love one, yeah. One of the old lethals.

-I can't believe you're drinking this.

-Do you know what?

I actually quite like it.

You know, to start off, I was just being kind to George.

-When you finish this...

-Yeah.

-Just finish it quickly.

-OK.

-(Go and drink this!

(It's his bottle, specially from wherever it was. Seriously nice!)

-Come on. We'll crack it open.

-Listen.

I found this in the car park behind the Campo today.

And I thought you could have it because it matches your shirt.

It's a St Christopher.

And I thought, as you'll go far, he's the patron saint of travellers, I'm not quite sure.

I don't think he actually exists any more.

Ah, St Christopher. Aww!

-It's really nice.

-Badge.

Yes, I'd love one. Thank you.

Here you are, Badgerooni.

Charlie, for you?

I won't, actually, no. I've got a bit of a dicky stomach.

Right. Anyone else?

Health.

-Are we going to Frankfurt?

-Cheers.

You like Negroni?

-Mmm.

-You see, I do.

-A bit sour.

-Mmm.

-I like the bits of orange.

-What's the sour taste?

-Oh, I've got two.

It's an old man's drink.

-No it's not!

-It is, it's a grandpa drink. Like Campari!

Yeah, but all those beautiful young people in Roma

will be drinking it on the terraces, won't they?

No! They'll drink vodka tonic, or...I don't know, beer.

Actually, that's what they drink. Italians drink beer.

Most people are kind of Italian sophisticated,

they're not actually old, thank God.

-What did you get up to, Badge?

-This evening?

-No, today.

-Today?

-Oh, Shopping. Got some really lovely shoes.

-Jack's waiting for me.

-Um, Dad, you know, up there, by the castle, where the hill is?

-Yup.

-You know Giovanna lives there as well?

-Mm-hm.

-Interesting.

Thanks for the Negroni.

Pleasure.

Oh, damn, I've left my mobile phone in my room, hang on.

I'll take that.

-Can I have another one of these?

-Yeah, help yourself.

-Thanks.

-Hey, steady!

-Yeah.

-They are quite strong.

-Mm-hm.

What's in it? Vodka, Campari?

Vodka, Campari, Vermouth, little bit of soda.

ENGINE GRINDS AND WHIRRS

If anyone... It's just...

-It's all right.

-Yeah, it could have been any of us.

It could have been any of us, actually.

TRUCK ENGINE GRINDS AND WHIRRS

BIRDSONG

We were driving round, and we parked up by the castle,

and there was an oil leak.

-On the drive.

-We didn't know what it was.

-We thought we'd better...

It's such a great car, we didn't know what to do, so we thought,

we're on our way to town anyway, so, we to get straight to the mechanic.

-So it's there for a couple of days.

-Just for a bit...

You either go by bus, or someone can take you in.

It would be amazing if someone could take us.

Is there anyone else you know who's going in who could take us?

How often does the bus go?

The bus is every hour, but then you have a problem coming back.

-Because, at half past seven, they stop the buses...

-Ciao, Elisabetta!

-Hi.

-Hi. Very young.

-Hi.

I'm going to pick your brains? The Palio. 7 o'clock start?

WOMAN SINGS IN ITALIAN

MEN REPEAT

THEY CONTINUE

THEY HOLLER AND WHOOP

MUSIC BLARES

DRUMMERS PLAY MARCHING BEAT

I'm going for a drink. I'm walking and talking.

Come on, onwards!

We've got to keep going, we've got to keep going.

Andiamo!

Wa-ay!

WOMAN YELLS DRUNKENLY

DRUNKEN HUBBUB

Way up your head!

-Wa-a-ay!

-Wa-ay!

-Wa-ay!

THEY ALL CHEER

THEY WHOOP

We're called the cone controller.

Wa-a-ay! Wa-ay!

Hey, Charlie? Hooray!

Whoo-hoo!

-Put him in the boot!

-I'm not going in the boot, OK?

Get in the back!

Right Charlie, we're ready to go!

Argh!

Now, I'm going to show you my party trick.

-OK.

-OK?

-OK, I'm ready.

-Hey!

There you go, that's my pre-Palio warm-up act.

-They're going to employ me next year...

-Did they teach you that at Eton, or what?

-Oooh, harsh!

Right.

Oakley?

You can come in if you want.

I'd better not.

G'night.

DOOR SHUTS

DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE

DISTANT VOICES AND LAUGHTER

What d'you mean, Alex, "who I'm involved with?"

I'm not involved with anybody.

Yeah, I just wanted...

Yeah, I just wanted a holiday.

We've been over this.

MUFFLED VOICE ON THE PHONE

Alex, you know, I was just phoning to have a nice talk with you, and...

-Oh, my God, I just saw a shooting star.

-Where?

-Where? Just up there.

Bollocks, I was looking there, I didn't see a shooting star!

-Well, you're not looking hard enough, clearly. I definitely saw one.

-I want to see a shooting star.

-Did you wish for something?

-Of course.

-Of course.

But you know, in Italy, we have this...some saying,

when you see a shooting star, you say, "stella, bella stella, desidero che."

Ah! What's that, what's it?

Which means, "Star, beautiful star, I wish for..."

-Whatever you wish for.

-Yeah.

-It's Stella...

-Stella.

-..Bella stella...

-Bella stella.

-..Desidero che...

-Desidero che.

And wish for... And you just wish for whatever...

OK, what is it? Stella...

Bella, Stella...

-Desidero che.

-Desidero che.

-Exactly.

-And then I make my wish, so silencio for my wish.

-OK.

OK, that's it. I made my wish.

What do they call you, Giovanna? Do they call you...Giovanna,

-or do you have, like, a nickname for short?

-G.

-G.

-It's either G or Gio.

What?! I was completely myself.

That's true. All that romancey-shmancy,

"Oh, look at that star, look at this star."

Mate, I saw a shooting star. What could I say?

Listen, man. I wasn't buying it, she wasn't buying it.

There was nothing to buy!

-What're you talking about?

-Not smoking, enough said.

You didn't offer me a cigarette.

Well, did you?

-Don't be an asshole.

-What is this?

It's noth...

-You really?

-I... she's great.

Yeah. She is GREAT. Fucking great.

It's just, you know...

That stupid grin on your face ever since you met her.

THAT grin, exactly.

What grin?

Come on, what am I going to do?

You're off on your ownsome in a couple of days.

So when you leave I need a little company.

I do, I do! It'll be great.

She'll come over, we'll go swimming,

put a little sun cream on her back...

I know you'll do whatever you want any way.

-That's right, I certainly will.

-That's the problem with you.

What? The problem with me? Come on, man.

Hi, Al.

I'm sorry too.

You know, Al, I think in a way, I'm doing the same thing here.

In a way.

Course I'm coming back.

SHE SIGHS

It's just that it's just been so nice

just to lose myself in this big group of people.

It's like a big family. Well, it IS a family.

It's a big extended family, and I don't know, I've just been able to sort of...

go with the flow and not think about anything.

MUFFLED VOICE ON PHONE

Family isn't just two people on their own.

Well, I mean, that's just not my understanding of it.

Did you hear me? I said it's not my understanding of it.

-THUNDER

-Certainly a fine wine.

Does the name Vino Nobile di Montepulciano mean anything to you?

Vino certainly does.

Two bottles of it, rather expensive bottles, disappeared,

drunk by a person or persons.

-By you, I should think.

-No, I left it in the usual place in the kitchen,

on the shelf where I always leave the good stuff, and they've gone.

With all the others.

Hmm? No, I keep those good ones that I was intending for us to...

Don't smirk at me, you sneering little bastard. Did you drink them?!

No.

You didn't drink them? They just disappeared, did they?

So you're a liar as well as everything else.

-Fucking arse.

-You just said...

-It doesn't matter.

THUNDER

CICADAS CHIRRUP

-VERENA:

-We just used to sleep with anybody.

You know, it was just like...

-How many times?

-How many times?

-How many people?

-How many people before you first got married?

-Oh, gosh.

-Go on.

-Hit me with double figures.

-Who's counting? It's definitely double figures.

Definitely double figures?

I have a very fond memory of one on a beach

in Provincetown, Massachusetts.

-We just had sex and then he went on down the beach.

-Did you know he was a vet before you started?

Oh, yeah, because he had these incredible tattoos which I inquired about.

-These people are wild!

-I know, but I was 18 on a beach.

-You don't know what he could've done.

I didn't think about the consequences, this is what I mean.

Yeah, but I wouldn't sleep with a Vietnam vet!

He was pretty gorgeous. He was strong.

-VERONA:

-Badge's ignoring me at the moment. I don't know what I've done.

I asked her if she wanted to come out shopping, she loves shopping.

Didn't even answer me.

Jack is behaving really strangely.

I just wonder if he's angry with me or Charlie or...

-You'd tell me if something was going on, wouldn't you?

-Of course.

Normally they tell me everything.

It's not like them to keep things from me.

They seem to be so much more chatty with you.

Anna, if something has happened, I need to know.

Look... I...

I want to talk about it with you,

but please can you assure me it's not going to go any further?

-I've made a promise...

-No, I can't.

-I've got to tell Charlie.

-I've made a promise.

-Oh, fuck your promise.

These are my kids.

Were you in the car?

-Yeah.

-So you weren't going to tell me?

-We have got that car on loan from Elisabetta and Jonathan.

-I know!

It was given to us in good faith.

How well aware are you of it? Obviously not THAT aware.

-It's an old banger, V...

-Don't! I don't care whether you think it's an old banger or it's a new car,

that is NOT the point. The principle is that we borrowed that car in good faith!

I know. I know.

-I don't get it...

-V, I made a promise.

VOICES ARGUING

-JACK:

-I'm sorry. It was an accident. We didn't mean...

-VERONA:

-You lied to Elisabetta as well!

You told her the car had a fuel leak or something, didn't you? Ugh!

I thought it was... I... We didn't want to get YOU in trouble by telling Elisabetta.

-Oh(!)

-We thought it would be better...

-You were thinking of us, were you, Jack?

-No, but seriously!

-CHARLIE:

-You just calm down.

-Seriously, seriously.

-You are responsible for yourselves!

You're also responsible for Archie.

Did that enter your head at any point?

Or were you so pissed that you couldn't even think?

We don't say no to you and you just take advantage

and that's what's REALLY upset me.

-I trust you and I trust Badge!

-V, V, V, come on.

-I trust you both and you just take advantage!

-See what you've done?

You've just ruined this whole thing.

How is this reflected just on me, like it was just me who was driving?

-It's not just you!

-I wasn't even doing anything!

-Oh, Jack, come on.

Badge was driving, Oakley should have been driving. Yeah?

I really don't think how I'm the most guilty person.

Just go and think about it. Piss off, go on.

-I'll say sorry to Elisabetta.

-Yeah, you certainly will.

-But, fine, I will.

-Go away, go away.

SIGHS

-Jeez. Are you all right?

-Mm.

-V...

-It makes me so angry.

They ARE all right, that's the main thing.

I know, but you can't say that to them,

that really what you care about is they could've killed themselves.

-CHARLIE INSIDE HOUSE:

-'TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED TO THE CAR NOW!

'I will stop this, I will fucking swipe you, unless you tell me!

' I'll take your fucking...'

-JACK INSIDE HOUSE:

-'Dad, listen to me! Don't you fucking start!

'You don't have a leg to FUCKING stand on!

'You haven't got a leg to fucking stand on!'

'Sit down! Sit down and listen!'

'Right?! Sit down and tell me!

'SIT DOWN!'

'WHEN HAVE YOU EVER GIVEN A FUCK ABOUT ME?

'SINCE WHEN HAVE YOU EVER GIVEN A FUCK ABOUT ME?'

'I tell you I love you.'

'Since when do you give a shit?! What am I responsible for, fuck?

'You want to talk about your childhood?'

'No, I don't! That's PRECISELY what I don't want to do.'

-'Because you want to stay in it!'

-'I don't give a shit!'

-'You want to stay in your fucking childhood?'

-'I don't give a shit!'

-'You won't accept any responsibility.

'You're a young adult now, for FUCK's sake!'

-'Why don't we sit down and talk?

-'No! What do you fucking care?'

'I fucking care. Why do I fucking care?

'I fucking care because it's a car being written off

'and because four lives have been put in danger

'because of your FUCKING idiocy!'

'You're a fucking disgrace!'

'You're unworthy!

'I don't want to see you again!'

'If you fucking hit me, I will fucking hit you back.

' I am not afraid of you.

'Fuck off!'

-JACK SPITS

-Out!

DOOR SLAMS

CICADAS CHIRP

I'm so sorry, Tom.

I've got nothing to say to you.

FUCK OFF!

CICADAS CHIRP LOUDLY

Hello.

Hello. This is my father-in-law.

EXCITED CHATTER

THEY ALL TALK OVER EACH OTHER

Look at you! How you've grown!

Look!

Archie? Archie.

Nice to meet you.

-If ever I've got a chance with a girl, I'm really...

-A chance?

You'll never have a chance with a girl!

-What, you've never even got a chance?

-Shut up, man. Shut up!

I'm not talking to you about it.

POLITE CHATTER

PIANO PLAYS

-God!

-What's my mum saying? What IS my mum saying?

INAUDIBLE OVER CHATTER

HE PLAYS UPBEAT, LIGHT TUNE

MUSIC CONTINUES

MUSIC STOPS

THEY SPEAK IN ITALIAN

SHE RINGS A BELL

EXCITED CHATTER

Well, about 25 years ago, this place had a terrible robbery

and they stole everything.

And so we had to find furniture to put back in here

and I was given this sofa by a friend of mine

who owned a villa called Villa Feltrinelli on Lake Garda,

where Mussolini had his Republic of Salo after the armistice.

-And, so, this was his personal sofa.

-Goodness!

And because he needed sex ...frequently,

every day, more than every day, erm,

this is probably where he had it.

After that... After that, what was our English commander called?

-Montgomery?

-Montgomery also went there

and I met the gardener who knew them all.

And I actually lay on Mussolini's bed, as well.

-Goodness.

-So, that's where the sofa comes from.

Which was sort of sagging, was it? It is very comfortable.

And in fact, I think you were shown by... Weren't you shown the shell?

-Yeah, sticking in the wall?

-Yes.

-Very curious angle.

Well it was an Allied shell.

So, when I got married, it was a bet, of course,

my father-in-law took me down and said,

"This, I believe, is yours."

So I said, "Most terribly sorry." I didn't know what else to say.

Anna, would you be so kind as to go and tell the young

that they should be thinking about getting their things together?

Not at all. Um, I don't know where they are.

-They went upstairs.

-Did they?

-That's all I know. Yeah.

-They're in the Tower Room, I think.

-Oh.

Right.

-Would you like me to come with you?

-No, that's OK, thank you.

-Are you sure?

Beatricia, that was so delicious, thank you has so, so much.

I must get...

I'd love that recipe, the ham mousse recipe, before we leave.

-It is so easy to do.

-Mmm.

I mean, you throw in a few things and you mix everything.

But, yes, very subtle taste, absolutely gorgeous.

Beatrice's from Bologna.

GENTLE BIRDSONG

SPEECH INAUDIBLE

We've had nothing but disdain, sarcasm...nothing from that child.

-It's a cover-up, George. He's covering up.

-Fuck him, fuck him.

That isn't what I've seen. That isn't what I've seen.

-I have.

-I agree, Charlie. I haven't just seen that.

Yeah, but you're...seeing it from a particular stance all the time.

My stance, yes. That's all I can see it from.

Yeah, but you're not... You're saying, you change your attitude,

I'm not going to change mine.

-I'm too old to change my attitudes.

-You're not, George.

-Oh, come on.

Look at you at the Palio.

You were like a young boy watching that Palio.

You were full of awe and wonder.

-Sure.

-And that's what HE'S like.

I didn't have my supercilious prat of a son

giving me dumb insolence all the time at the Palio.

So it was a bit of a relief. I had quite a good time.

You had a brilliant time. I just think...

-let yourself off the hook, George.

-I've left myself off the hook, actually.

I have let myself off the hook.

I've decided not to care too much about what he does with his life.

He'll be fine, he'll be fine.

Go on, one final ring of fire or something.

Come on, we've got so much booze to get through. We've got sambuca we've got to finish, vodka...

-um, that Cynar stuff. The potent red shit.

-OK. I'm going to bed.

-Going to bed?

-Yes.

-What?!

-Yeah.

-Last cigarette.

-Bullshit.

-I don't believe it for a second.

-Finito.

Yeah, whatever you say, man. Keep telling yourself.

-You're going to bed?

-Yeah.

Yeah, I've got to pack stuff.

-Er, pack?

-Mm-hm.

-What?!

-Yeah.

-You're going to pack?

-Yep.

-Mate, you can do that in half-an-hour. Do it in the morning.

-No, no. I've got a lot to do.

Have a good one. See you guys later.

HE LAUGHS

Have a wild pack(!)

HE LAUGHS

You know what? I don't really feel like staying up and getting lashed.

I'm going to go help Jack. Night, guys.

Everyone's a fucking barrel of laughs tonight.

-You're not going to pack, are you?

-No, no.

-Pool?

-Yeah, cool.

Let's do it!

"I'm just going to pack"? It's the last night. What is that?

I know, it's lame.

-It just isn't the spirit of the holiday, you know.

-It certainly isn't.

-Cheers, man.

-Cheers.

Here's to your Italian Bella we're going to find in Siena tomorrow night.

She is going to be hot!

-She's going to be like nothing you've ever seen before.

-Yeah.

It'll break the, er, the lifelong amnesty.

HE LAUGHS

Sorry.

DOGS BARK IN DISTANCE

ANNA'S PHONE RINGS

Hi, V.

I'm fine, V.

Yeah, honestly, I'm fine.

I-I'm in a hotel.

In Monteroni, actually.

God! This is grim.

I like it.

-Is it something I've done?

-No, V.

It must be something I've done, you've always talked to me.

Why are you not telling me what's going on?

V...

It's been...it's been years since we've talked to each other properly, hasn't it?

Well, I don't think so. I spoke to you about Anthony only a few months ago.

Well, I suppose there have been things in my life that I haven't told you about.

OK. You probably can't tell me everything. We don't see each other as much as we used to

but if it's something big, wouldn't you tell me?

If something big had happened?

I think the bigger it is, the more difficult it is to tell you.

To tell anybody.

So it's not just me, you mean you don't...

you haven't told anybody else?

What is it?

Oh, come on.

ANNA SOBS

Don't cry.

What's happened?

ANNA SOBS

Oh, darling, what's happened?

Come on, come on.

Is it Alex? Is it Alex? What's happened?

-Have you left him?

-No.

Has he left you?

What's happened? Please, tell me.

Anna, Anna, Anna.

What can I do with you?

You are so special. You are such a dear person.

I hate being angry with you but you have really made me

so worried this whole holiday, you have been acting so strangely.

I knew something was wrong.

Come on, tell me what it is. Please, tell me.

And I can help you, I hope I can help you.

What's happened?

I thought I was going to have a baby!

Oh, God.

What do you mean? You're...

-Are you pregnant?

-No.

-You were pregnant?

-No.

I thought I was pregnant.

Right. And then what happened?

I...I went to see...

I went to see a doctor.

-I was sure I was pregnant.

-Yep.

I did a pregnancy test and it was negative but I've known so many people with negative results,

I still thought I was pregnant. I was convinced I was pregnant.

I went to see a doctor and...he... he told me I wasn't pregnant.

And he did some tests and...he told me...

He said that it was a symptom of menopause.

That I'm-I'm-I'm now menopausal

I'm not going to be able to have children any more.

I feel so stupid!

Don't feel stupid.

You were right to think you might be pregnant.

No! But I...

-You're young and it's obviously...

-But I'm not young, am I?

I mean, I had my opportunities and I didn't...and I didn't take them.

I didn't take them when I could.

No, but perhaps the timing wasn't right then, anyway.

You know, the timing's never right, is it?

I mean, you took your opportunities.

I did, I did, I know I did.

You know, and even though... even though perhaps it was

the wrong man the first time round, you still had your children,

you've still got your children.

And, you know, no matter what happens you will always have your children,

your children love you.

And I look and you and I look at them and you're so secure in their love.

It's not as simple as that, it looks like that from the outside.

-Well, V, it is.

-It's not ever as simple as that.

I don't mean to argue with you but it is. That's how it is.

I've seen you, you're surrounded by your family. You belong somewhere.

I will just be forever, now, on the periphery of things.

SHE WASHES HER FACE

You look fine.

It was a shit name, wait, I get to change mine. Lilo fuck.

-We've had that one.

-Er, er, er, er...rhinoceros fuck.

-OK.

-Smoking-kills-you fuck, what the fuck,

-what about a...

-Rhinoceros fuck.

-Rhinoceros fuck, what the fuck,

-what about a smoking-kills-you fuck?

-Smoking-kills-you fuck,

what about an Arnie fuck?

Arnie fuck?!

LAUGHTER

What the fuck, what about a lightning fuck?

Lightning fuck, what the fuck?

How about a...um...

SCREAMING

Drink it, drink it, drink it. You can't get away with quarters.

-You're going to be hammered!

-Can you be a bit quieter, please?

HE SNIGGERS

What the fuck?

-HE LAUGHS

-Shut-up fuck.

LAUGHTER

What's the matter?

Oh!

SHE SOBS Oh, darling.

Alex...Alex. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Darling, I wish I...I wish I could make it better but I can't.

I wish I could.

My first holiday on my own was... when I turned 13, actually.

And from then on I just...

went around either with my brother or just to meet friends,

stay with friends' families.

-Separate?

-Yeah, always.

-And your parents went away at the same time?

-Well, yes.

Yeah, they come out here or just stay in Rome or go on holiday...

-..with my younger brother.

-Well, we tried!

I like having everyone together.

Well, they're at school most of the time, we don't see enough of them.

-Mm-hm.

-Do we?

-So whereabouts is it in Rome that you live?

I live in an area called Parioli.

-Oh, right.

-Which is just about ten minutes' driving from the centre.

DOOR SQUEAKS

-Vuoi un po' di caffe'?

-Um, si', um, te'.

-Ah, te'.

-Senza latte, si'.

-Bene.

-Ciao.

-Ciao, buon giorno.

THEY SPEAK ITALIAN

-Ciao.

-Ciao.

-Grazie mille.

-Grazie a voi.

-Ciao.

Have you packed your toothbrush, darling, upstairs?

-Hey.

-Buon giorno.

-Si parte?

-Si', l'anno prossimo arrivo solo, senza famiglia!

-Senza ragazzi!

-Hi.

-Hello, Charlie.

-You OK?

-Yeah.

Where is everyone? Come on. Arch, have you checked everything?

-Yeah, everywhere.

-Really? Really? Double-checked?

-Badge, have you checked everything?

-Yes.

Under the bed, over the wardrobe?

V, can you check... Yes, I've done that.

-I'm going to get the cutlery, OK?

-OK, darling.

-Can you just have a check round once more?

-Yes, of course I will.

V, you're working far too hard.

-NETTA SPEAKS ITALIAN

-Oh, Netta.

I know, I should whisk you off to... I don't know what, a health farm for a week.

-Please do!

-I tell you what, when I'm back in London, come down for a day

and we'll do one of those sort of wrap yourselves in towels

and spend the whole day somewhere hot and steamy.

-We'll just have a good chat.

-Let's do that.

-Anche' un po' di latte?

-Un poco.

-But you're going to have to push it, V.

-Bene?

-Bene.

-Mmm, bella.

-Tu vuoi un po' di latte?

-No, grazie.

-No.

-Cheers.

-Cheers. Which one!

Arch, hat.

I'd better do this.

-Keep it short, very good.

-And sweet.

-Yeah!

It's still very hot out there.

-Right.

-OK.

-On my way.

-I'll come out and say goodbye.

Say goodbye.

Ciao, prego.

THEY SPEAK ITALIAN

Ciao, mwah.

THEY SPEAK ITALIAN

THEY CHAT INDISTINCTLY

-They both have that similar quality.

-They do.

They just get stuck on things, it has to be done a certain way.

-You just want a bit of space, that's all.

-I know.

-Nothing else, really.

-Absolutely.

-Hiya.

-Bye, Charlie.

-All the best, darling.

-Bye.

-See you soon.

-Thank you. Bye.

-Take care.

Bye, George. Same to you.

-Bye, Anna, take care.

-See you. Bye.

-I'll come and see you, OK?

-Yeah.

-Ciao.

-Ciao, bello.

-It's been a pleasure.

-Come on, Arch. That's got to go on someone's lap.

I suppose we just have to work at it, don't we?

Oh, God, that sounds so boring, V!

-I know you're right.

-See you.

-Bye, Oak.

-Have a good one.

-Good luck.

-Thanks.

-Anyway...

-Bet you just want to run away somewhere sometimes.

Yes, I did. Look what happened!

-Bye, darling.

-Bye.

-Take me to an Iggy Pop concert!

-Now, that's the best idea.

-I'll hold you to it.

-Bye, darling.

-Bye.

-Is he still alive, by the way?

-Who knows!

-Bye.

-Bye.

-Bye.

-Bye.

SOMEONE SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY

Va bene?

Well, I don't...I don't give a damn that you don't give a damn!

I'm going to subject you to a description of the landscape

whether you like it or not. And there's a beautiful...

Alex, listen, there's a beautiful ridge with lovely cypresses and...

I can't hear...

Alex, you've broken up again, I can't hear a word you're saying.

Hello? Hello, are you still there?

God, it is going to be so nice to have conversations with you

not on a mobile phone, this is getting boring... Hello?

Hi. OK... Hi, hi, I'm still here.

Are you still there? Look, tell me about you, where are you?

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