A Single Man

(ATMOSPHERIC CLASSICAL MUSIC)

(TYRES SKIDDING FOLLOWED BY A CRASH)

(EVOCATIVE SOLO STRINGS THROUGHOUT)

(AMPLIFIED HEARTBEAT BECOMES RAPID)

(GASPS)

(BANGING FROM NEXT DOOR)

'Waking up begins with saying 'am' and 'now'.'

-(OUTSIDE)

-Jennifer, I'm not going to tell you again!

(CLOCK TICKS LOUDLY)

(BREATHES DEEPLY AND LOUDLY)

(SEAGULLS CRY)

'For the past eight months waking up has actually hurt.

'Cold realisation that I am still here slowly sets in.

'I was never terribly fond of waking up.

'I was never one to jump out of bed and greet the day with a smile

'like Jim was.

'I used to want to punch him sometimes in the morning,

'he was so happy.'

'I always used to tell him that only fools greet the day with a smile,

'that only fools could possibly escape the simple truth

'that now isn't simply now, it's a cold reminder.

'One day later than yesterday, one year later than last year,

'and that sooner or later it will come.

'He used to laugh at me and then give me a kiss on the cheek.

'It takes time in the morning for me to become George,

'time to adjust to what is expected of George and how he is to behave.

'By the time I have dressed and put the final layer of polish

'on the now slightly stiff but quite perfect George...

'..I know fully what part I'm supposed to play.'

'Looking in the mirror staring back at me,

'isn't so much a face as the expression of a predicament.'

Just get through the goddamn day.

'A bit melodramatic, I guess, but then again...

'my heart has been broken.

'I feel as If I am sinking, drowning, can't breathe.'

(GASPS WITH PAIN)

(CLOCK TICKS LOUDLY)

-Aren't you going to say something?

-Are you kidding? It's spectacular.

What are you doing? Stop it. Stop it.

I didn't think you're quite ready for life in a glasshouse.

Drapes, old man.

You're the one who's always saying that we're invisible.

That's not exactly what I meant.

(PHONE RINGS)

'For the first time in my life I can't see my future.

'Every day goes by in a haze,

'but today I have decided will be different.'

(PHONE RINGS)

Finally. You know it's been raining here all day

and I've been trapped in this house waiting for you to call.

'I'm sorry. I must have the wrong number.

'I'm calling for Mr George Falconer.'

I'm sorry, I was expecting someone else. Yes, sir,

you have indeed called the correct number. How may I help?

'This is Harold Ackerley. I'm Jim's cousin.'

Oh, of course. Yes, good evening, Mr Ackerley.

'I'm afraid I'm calling with some bad news.'

-Oh?

-'There has been a car accident.'

(HEAVY RAIN THROUGHOUT) Accident?

'There's been a lot of snow here lately and the roads have been icy.

'On his way into town, Jim lost control of his car.

'It was instantaneous, apparently.'

Oh.

'It happened late yesterday but his parents didn't want to call you.'

I see.

'In fact, they don't know I'm calling you now,

'but I thought that you should know.'

Thank you.

'I know this must be quite a shock. It was for all of us.'

Yes, indeed.

Will there be a service?

'The day after tomorrow.'

Well, I suppose I should get off the phone and book a plane flight.

'The service is just for family.'

For family, of course.

Well, thank you for calling.

-Oh, Mr Ackerely?

-'Yes?'

May I ask what happened to the dogs?

'Dogs? Er, there was a dog with him but he died. Was there another one?'

Yes. There was a small female.

'I don't know. I'm sorry. I haven't heard anyone mention another dog.'

Well, thank you for calling, Mr Ackerely.

-'Goodbye, Mr Falconer.'

-(HANGS UP)

(FUMBLES HANDSET)

(SILENCE EXCEPT FOR RAIN POURING)

(PHONE RINGS)

(ORCHESTRAL MUSIC THROUGHOUT)

(BANGING FROM NEIGHBOUR'S HOUSE)

(SILENCE EXCEPT FOR BANGING)

(METAL DETECTOR BEEPS)

(CAR DRIVES PAST)

(CHATTER FROM OUTSIDE)

(PHONE RINGS)

(PHONE CONTINUES TO RING)

Hello, Charly.

How did you know it was me?

Charlotte, nobody else calls me before eight in the morning.

I didn't call too early, did I? You sound grumpy.

No. I have a headache.

'I was about to call you, actually.

'Is it too late to change my mind about tonight?'

No, of course not. I haven't seen you all week.

'I'm dying for a dose of you.'

I know. I'm sorry.

'So, great. I'll see you tonight. I have to run now I'm late for work.'

I'll call you later from school.

All right, I'll see you then.

-Bye, kiddo.

-Bye, old man.

(CHUCKLES)

Good morning, Mr George.

-Sir, you don't look so good today.

-Good morning, Alva.

No, I didn't sleep very well.

You forgot to take the bread out of the freezer.

It stays fresh that way.

It was a little too fresh this morning.

There are some papers on my desk which need to stay there

so please don't move them, and I'm afraid my pen leaked over the bed.

-It's OK, sir.

-Alva?

Yes, sir?

Thank you. You're wonderful.

(SILENCE EXCEPT FOR SLOW-MOTION TICKING)

(SILENCE EXCEPT FOR ORCHESTRAL SCORE)

-(CAR RADIO)

-'... and maintains closest surveillance

'of the Soviet military build-up on the island of Cuba.

'Within the past week, unmistakable evidence has established...'

(SLOW TICKING)

(HUSTLE AND BUSTLE OF STUDENTS)

-Professor Falconer?

-Yes.

There was a student here asking for your address.

My address?

-Did you give it to him?

-Yes, sir. I did.

I hope that's OK. I realise I probably shouldn't have but...

he was very nice. Before I knew it, he... (CHUCKLES)

Your hair looks great like that. It really suits you.

You always look so beautiful. Really fresh. You have such a lovely smile.

(HEART BEATS)

(INHALES DEEPLY)

-Arpege?

-Sir?

Really beautiful. (PHONE RINGS)

-(RADIO)

-'..that a series of offensive missile sites...'

-Morning, Don.

-Good morning, George.

(VENDING MACHINE CLICKS)

-Good morning, George.

-Good morning, Grant.

You look awful. What have you been doing?

Look around you, Grant.

Most of these students aspire to nothing more than a corporate job

and a desire to raise Coke-drinking, TV-watching children

who as soon as they can speak chant TV jingles

-and smash things with hammers.

-You're scaring me today, George.

You can't tell me you have an easy time with these students?

They stare at me in a kind of bovine stupor

as if I were lecturing in a foreign language.

Remind me why we shouldn't all be annihilated?

You seem to think this is all a joke. Nuclear war is a real threat.

I don't understand how that doesn't concern you.

-You're serious, aren't you?

-Yes, I'm serious.

George, did you read the article I gave you on bomb shelters?

We had three contractors work on ours

so none of them knows what we've got.

We're having the outside landscaped so no-one knows it's there.

Really? (BLEATING AND CLUCKING)

If word gets out you've got a better shelter,

-everyone will try to get in when something happens.

-And so?

There will be no time for sentiment

when the Russians fire a missile at us.

If it's going to be a world with no time for sentiment

then it's not a world I want to live in.

(CLICK OF TYPING)

(OFFICE CHATTER)

After Many A Summer Dies The Swan.

I take it you've all read the Huxley novel

that I assigned more than three weeks ago?

How does the title relate to our story?

-Yes, Mr Mong.

-It doesn't. I mean,

it's about a rich guy who's too afraid, too old for this girl...

(RICH ORCHESTRAL SCORE SWELLS)

(HEART POUNDS THROUGHOUT)

(STUDENTS LAUGH RAUCOUSLY)

Russ.

(CIGARETTE CRACKLES)

Yes, Mr Hirsch.

Sir, on page 79, Mr Propter says that the stupidest text in the Bible

is "they hated me without a cause".

Does that mean the Nazis were right to hate the Jews?

Is Huxley an anti-Semite?

No.

No, Mr Huxley is not an anti-Semite.

Of course the Nazis were wrong to hate the Jews,

but their hating the Jews was not without a cause.

It's just that the cause wasn't real. The cause was imagined.

The cause was fear.

Let's leave the Jews out of this just for a moment.

Let's think of another minority. One that can go unnoticed if it needs to.

There are all sorts of minorities, blondes, for example.

People with freckles.

But a minority is only thought of as one

when it constitutes some kind of threat to the majority. A real threat

or an imagined one. And therein lies the fear.

And if that minority is somehow invisible...

..then the fear is much greater.

And that fear is why the minority is persecuted.

So, you see, there always is a cause. The cause is fear.

Minorities are just people.

People like us.

I can see I've lost you a bit.

Tell you what? We're going to forget about Mr Huxley today.

We're going to talk about fear.

Fear, after all, is our real enemy.

Fear is taking over our world.

Fear is being used as a tool of manipulation in our society.

It's how politicians peddle policy.

It's how Madison Avenue sells us things you don't need.

Think about it.

The fear of being attacked.

The fear that there are communists lurking around every corner.

The fear that some Caribbean country

that doesn't believe in our way of life poses a threat.

The fear that black culture may take over the world.

The fear of Elvis Presley's hips!

Actually, maybe that one is a real fear.

Fear that our bad breath may ruin our friendships.

Fear of growing old and being alone.

(CLOCK TICKS)

Fear that we're useless and that no-one cares what we have to say.

Have a good weekend.

Sir! May I talk to you for a minute?

Why don't you always talk to us like that?

I don't think it went over very well.

Man, fear of things gets to me all the time,

but you can't talk about it with anyone or you sound like a fool.

You can't even talk about it with Lois?

I don't think she's afraid of anything.

Everyone's afraid of something, Kenny.

What are you afraid of, sir?

Cars.

How can you live in Los Angeles and be afraid of cars?

Maybe you can't.

Sometimes my fear of things can almost paralyse me.

It's like I get panic-stricken and feel I might explode or something...

May I ask you a personal question, sir?

If you like.

Do you ever get high?

How old do I look to you?

Have you ever taken drugs?

Of course, Kenny.

Like what?

I don't feel I should be discussing this with you on campus, Mr Potter.

It's the only way I get by sometimes.

Have you ever tried mescaline?

Not my drug of choice.

I shaved off one of my eyebrows once on mescaline. Not a good look for me.

Sir?

I looked in the mirror, big mistake if you're high on mescaline.

I decided my eyebrows were taking over my face

and before I knew it, I'd shaved one off.

Wore a Band-aid for six weeks while the brow grew back. Embarrassing.

You didn't take it again after that?

Kenny, have you been listening to me? I shaved off my eyebrow.

I wanted an experience, Mr Potter, not a career on stage.

-If you ever want to get high, sir, I usually have some dope.

-(LAUGHS)

You really are mad, aren't you?

I'm sorry, sir, I guess you don't feel comfortable talking like this.

What makes you say that?

Lois thinks you're kind of cagey. Like this morning,

when you were listening to all that crap we were talking about Huxley.

Not all of you. I didn't notice you open your mouth once.

I was watching you.

You let us ramble on and on and then you straighten us out,

but you never really tell us everything you know about something.

Well, maybe that's true, up to a point.

It's not that I want to be cagey.

It's just that I can't really discuss things completely openly at school.

Somebody would misunderstand.

I tried that today. Didn't really work out.

What was it you wanted to get, sir?

Nothing. I was on my way to the Dean's office.

You mean, you walked all the way down here just to talk to me?

Why not?

Well, I think you deserve something for that, sir.

-Here, sir, take your pick.

-(CHUCKLES)

It's on me.

Thank you.

-I thought you'd probably pick blue.

-Why blue?

Isn't blue supposed to be spiritual?

What makes you think I'm spiritual?

And you? Red?

What does red stand for?

A lot of things. Rage. Lust.

No kidding?

Well, sir, I guess I'll see you around.

(DIALLING TONE)

(SERGE GAINSBOURG SONG)

(PHONE RINGS)

(PHONE CONTINUES TO RING)

Hello?

What are you up to, kiddo?

Just trying to finish up a book. How's your day going?

'Quiet. I was just leaving school.'

'I wanted to know if you needed anything for tonight?'

Oh, thanks, you're sweet, but I think I'm all set. Oh.

'Be a darling...'

and pick up some gin for me? Tanqueray.

I love the colour of the bottle.

You love what's in it. What time do you want me?

Seven would be great if that's OK with you.

'Perfect. I'll see you then.'

See you then. Bye, Geo.

Bye, kiddo.

(HUMS CHEERFULLY)

Beautiful.

(TICKING)

(PANTS)

(BANGS ON THE WINDOW)

Yes, Mr Potter?

You going somewhere, sir?

That is usually why people get into their cars.

No, I mean, are you going on vacation or something?

-What?

-I saw you cleaning out your office.

What exactly is it that you want, Kenny?

I was just hoping that

perhaps we could get together for a drink or something sometime.

And why is that?

I don't know, sir. Because I think you might like it.

And because you seem as though you could use a friend.

-Oh really?

-Yes, sir, you do.

Well, you may be right, but it'll have to be another time. I'm late.

But thank you for the invitation.

And thank you for the talk earlier.

And stay off the mescaline.

-Hello, Mr Falconer.

-Hello. How are you today?

I'm fine, sir. Do you need to get into your box?

-Yes, I do. Thank you.

-Follow me.

Here you are, sir.

If you could please sign here.

Thank you.

(SILENCE EXCEPT FOR WIND BLOWING)

(BIRDSONG)

So explain your friend Charlotte for me.

What would you like to know?

I don't know. You seem very intimate, I guess.

Like you were once together, or something.

-You haven't slept with her, have you?

-Yes.

And?

A few times when we were younger.

I wouldn't say it mean nothing to me

but it certainly meant a great deal more to Charly.

It was a long time ago, in London.

I love Charly, and we are very close friends but that's all.

I'm confused. If you sleep with women, then why are you with me?

Because I fall in love with men. Because I fell in love with you.

Anyway, doesn't everyone sleep with women when they're young?

-I haven't.

-You're joking.

No. I'm not. It was just never anything that really interested me.

Well, you're awfully modern, aren't you?

You know, I think that was the first thing I noticed about you.

How sure of yourself you were.

How can you be so sure about everything at your age?

You think I'm sure of myself?

Of course you are.

I'm finished now. Thank you.

Yes, Mr Falconer.

Something else we can help you with today?

Can't find my cheque book and I need some cash.

Not my day, I'm afraid. Excuse me a minute.

(ROMANTIC MUSIC)

Mummy says bushy eyebrows are pedestrian,

but I think yours are pretty.

I think yours are pretty too.

Why do you look so sad?

Would you like to meet Charlton Heston?

Ben Hur.

He's our scorpion.

Every night we throw in something new to him and watch him kill it.

Daddy says it's like the Coliseum

so my brother Tom put all the columns on here.

He wants to be a set designer.

He hasn't eaten the spider yet

cos he's still full from the moth we gave him last night.

Daddy says he wants to throw you into the Coliseum.

No kidding. Why?

Well, he says you're light in your loafers

but you aren't even wearing loafers.

I think my brother Tom's light in his loafers too, but he wears Keds.

He made me do a hair-conditioning treatment on my hair with eggs.

Does it look shiny?

Sweetheart, what are you doing bothering Mr Falconer?

She's not bothering me at all, Susan. How are you?

I'm glad to see you, George.

We're having a few people over tonight for drinks

and would love it if you'd join us.

Thank you, it's very kind of you but I have plans.

Another time. Jennifer, let's let Mr Falconer get back to his banking.

-Goodbye, George.

-Goodbye, Susan. Bye, Jennifer.

-(CLICKS RIFLE)

-May I help you, sir?

I'd like to buy some bullets for this gun, please.

Yes, sir.

This is a really old gun, sir.

We have a two-for-one sale on handguns.

-Perhaps one for the little lady?

-No, thanks. Just the bullets, please.

There you go. Anything else?

-Er, no, thank you.

-That'll be 2.29, sir.

(TILL REGISTER PINGS)

(DOG BARKS)

(DOG PANTS)

I'm sorry. I hope she didn't growl at you.

She goes a bit crazy sometimes when I have to leave her.

She's perfect. What's her name?

India. Scoot over!

Say hello, baby.

I used to have smooth fox terriers. You don't see them very often.

(INHALES DEEPLY, DOG PANTS)

Her ears smell like buttered toast.

She's still a puppy, isn't she?

-Well, have a nice evening.

-You too. Good night, India.

-Whoa!

-(BOTTLE SMASHES)

-Sorry for that.

-It's OK.

It's my fault. I'll get you another pack.

It's OK, don't worry.

No, no, I insist.

Thank you. Sorry about the broken glass.

-There you go.

-Thanks, man.

Hey, you want one?

No, thanks.

Actually, yes. Why not? Thank you.

(AMPLIFIED HEARTBEAT)

(AMPLIFIED EXHALING)

-Carlos.

-What did you say?

Carlos. You asked me my name.

Are you OK?

Oh. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sorry.

(SEAGULLS CRY)

What are you doing?

Aren't we going somewhere?

No. But thanks.

I've never seen a sky like this before.

-Could I have another cigarette?

-Sure.

You sure you don't want to go for a drive?

I'm sure.

-Where are you from?

-Madrid.

Madrid? How did you get here?

It's a long story. I met a guy from LA at the hotel where I worked

who told me I could live with him and that he could get me an agent.

But I never realised that I have a Spanish accent.

(LAUGHS) I like your accent. You speak very well.

How did you learn English?

My mum had an American boyfriend when I was little.

Is your mother in Madrid?

Yes. She cuts hair. She cut my hair before I left. Do you like it?

I thought it made me look like James Dean.

You're better than James Dean.

Really? Thanks.

No-one has ever picked me up and not wanted something.

I think you picked me up.

This is kind of a serious day for me.

Come on. What could be so serious for a guy like you?

Oh, I'm just trying to get over an old love, I guess.

Well, my mother says that lovers are like buses.

You just have to wait a little while and another one comes along.

I have to go.

Thanks. But I'm going away.

(HUBBUB FROM NEIGHBOURS' PARTY)

(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS)

(JAZZ RECORD ENDS)

It's your turn to change it.

Yeah. I'm not changing it. It's your turn.

Besides, you never like what I put on.

I'll give you five dollars if you change it. I'm too old to get up.

You're only old when it's convenient for you to be old.

What are you reading anyway?

Oh, God, not that depressing crap again.

It's for my class. And what highbrow work of fiction might you be reading?

(LAUGHS) Don't be so smug.

(SIGHS) What a life he has. Don't you just envy him?

Why, because he can sniff anyone's ass he wants?

Nice. No, because he just does what he wants.

Like yesterday, I was standing in the front yard,

and Susan came over to talk and that little brat of hers, Christopher,

came running over waving that damned gun of his around.

Our little dog walked right up, hiked his leg

and peed over Christopher's tennis shoes.

-(LAUGHS)

-And all over Christopher actually.

Of course, I had to act like I was upset.

So perfectly executed, I wish you'd seen it.

After all the times those kids have tortured that poor dog.

I mean, you should take a lesson from them.

They don't stay up all night worrying.

They've figured out how to get the two of us

to do exactly what they want.

They're basically very sophisticated little parasites

when you think about it.

Well, the dumbest creatures are the happiest. Look at your mother.

They really just live in the moment.

Like now. What could be better than being tucked up here with you?

If I died right now...it'd be OK.

Well, it wouldn't be OK with me so shut up and go and change the record.

Good answer.

Oh, I was thinking about taking them to Denver next week

if it's OK with you.

My mom, she loves them.

Probably that recognition of a similar mind.

(THEY CHUCKLE)

You stay there, old man.

(MUSIC FROM THE PARTY DRIFTS IN)

MUSIC: "EBBEN NE ANDRO LONTANA" - CATALANI PLAYS THROUGHOUT

(LOUD TICKING)

(SIGHS DEEPLY)

(SIGHS IN FRUSTRATION)

(BUMPS AGAINST SHOWER WALL)

(PHONE RINGS)

(SIGHS)

No, I did not forget the gin.

I'll see you in ten minutes.

(FAKES MACHINE-GUN FIRING)

(SILENCE EXCEPT FOR ARIA)

Christopher, would you like it if I killed you?

I don't know.

Well, if you keep this up we're going to find out,

so why don't you go home and stop shooting people?

(DOORBELL)

(HEARTBEAT AMPLIFIED)

I'm so happy to see you.

(DRIVING RAIN)

Come on in.

It smells wonderful. I'm very hungry. Where's Louisa?

I gave her the night off. I'm cooking myself.

-You are?

-Yes, and I'm trying something new.

Charly, darling, you cooking is new.

Don't be smart. I'm in a good mood tonight and I'm going to be fun.

I've already made two New Year resolutions. Resolution one,

no more talk about awful ex-husbands and children who don't give a damn.

-And the other one?

-One what?

Resolution.

Oh, resolution two. More smoking and more drinking and screw it all!

So, come on, mix me up a drink.

I'll have a gin and tonic, please, and watch out, baby.

Coming up.

It was sweet of you to come tonight.

You know, sweet had nothing to do with it.

I needed to see you.

Oh, Geo, come off it.

Whenever you do something sweet, you're too ashamed to admit it.

Here's to our early New Year's resolutions.

-(THEY CLINK GLASSES)

-Cheers.

What are your resolutions, by the way?

To let go of the past. Completely, entirely, and for ever.

Mmm, light me up, will you?

Darling, you don't look well.

Do you remember that little heart attack you had last year?

-Wasn't a heart attack.

-Whatever it was, darling,

-you don't look so hot.

-I'm fine.

Have never felt better. I'm a little tired. I haven't been sleeping.

Geo, it's normal. You were with Jim for 16 years.

I think about Richard every day. It's hard being alone.

At least you have a job and a life.

Let's have a bit of dinner, shall we?

Because I've worked so very hard.

What are you talking about?

Seriously, there's no such thing as old any more.

The other day, one of my students called me a "senior citizen".

I wouldn't mind if "old" didn't exist,

but I'm not sure "senior" is what I'm aiming for either.

It's all becoming so bland. It's not why I came to America.

It's a complete breakdown of culture and manners.

The young ones have no manners.

The other day at the car wash, a young man looked me up and down

and asked me if I was a natural blonde.

-What did you say?

-I looked him straight in the eye and said,

"Well, let's just say if I stood on my head

"I'd be a natural brunette with lovely breath."

-You didn't! (LAUGHS)

-I did! (LAUGHS)

And the amusing thing was that it went right over his head.

You had a mouth on you even back in London.

Do you remember that old lesbian who threw her drink over your head

because you asked her if she was hung like a doughnut?!

(RAUCOUS LAUGHTER)

Oh, Geo, we could always go back to London. The two of us.

-No, thanks.

-You know you miss it.

I miss it sometimes.

Maybe if Jim had lived. He loved being in England.

He asked to stay last time we were there.

Do you really think you would have moved?

Don't know. It's silly to talk about it. It's only a fantasy.

What's this?

My mother's wedding ring. Found it in a drawer I was cleaning out.

Oh.

Charly, my dear, you and I are both in need of another drink.

(ICE CLINKS IN THEIR GLASSES)

MUSIC: "Stormy Weather" by Etta James

# Don't know why

# There's no sun up in the sky

# Stormy weather

# Since my man and I

# Ain't together

# Keeps raining all of the time

# Oh, yeah, life is bare

# Gloom and misery everywhere

# Stormy weather, stormy weather

# And I just can't get my poor self together... #

Wait, wait, wait!

(RECORD STOPS ABRUPTLY)

I love this!

You're insane.

Come on, old man.

MUSIC: "Green Onions" by Booker T & The MGs

(LAUGHS)

(GIGGLES)

Whoo!

(LAUGHTER)

Don't move.

(SIGHS DEEPLY)

Thank you.

-Very smooth cigarette move.

-I've always wanted to do that.

You don't even smoke.

Not for the last 16 years. Jim hated it.

What's to stop me now? It's not as if it's going to kill me?

This is so nice, lying here with you.

Don't you ever miss this?

What we could have been to each other?

Having a real relationship and kids?

I had... I had Jim.

No, I mean a real relationship.

Geo, let's be honest, what you and Jim had together was wonderful but...

wasn't it really just a substitute for something else?

Is that what you really think after all of these years? Hmm?

You think Jim was just some kind of substitute for real love?

Jim was not a substitute for anything. You understand?

And there is no substitute for Jim, anywhere!

And by the way, what is so real about your relationship with Richard?

He left you after nine years! Jim and I were together for 16 years

and if he hadn't died we'd still be together!

-What the hell is not real about that?!

-I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I know how much the two of you loved each other.

I suppose I'm just jealous that you and I never had that kind of love.

Actually I've never had that kind of love with anybody.

I don't think Richard ever loved me, except for the way I looked.

And Clay, I don't know. You raise a child and love it

and then when they're old enough they just leave.

Charly, there is nothing wrong with your life.

You like feeling sorry for yourself. It's one of your great pleasures.

And it's not one of yours? You're as pathetic as I am.

Feeling sorry for myself is not one of my pleasures.

It's not one of mine. I don't like feeling sorry for myself.

I tried to hold onto Richard for so long

even when it was obvious to everyone but me that it was over.

Now Clay is grown up. What am I doing here, Geo? Tell me, what?!

You have plenty of friends. You'll be fine.

Yes, I have friends. But none of them need me. And yes, I have you,

and if you weren't such a goddamn poof we could have all been happy!

I only have you now because you lost Jim.

Soon I'll lose you to someone else. It's not as easy for a woman.

I did everything the way I was supposed to

and all I have to keep me company is a bottle of gin.

Maybe you should try doughnuts with your gin.

Screw you!

Charlotte, you are dramatic.

I swear, you almost had me.

A tiny tear was beginning to form in the corner of my eye.

Now stop it. You are still breathtakingly beautiful...

..when you can be bothered to get out of bed

and stop whimpering about everything for five minutes.

Go to London. Change your life. If you're not happy being a woman,

stop acting like one.

You have all the answers.

I don't have any of them, actually.

If you're so smart, why don't you do something new with your life?

Take that position at Stanford? You complain about that school

-but you could go anywhere you want.

-What I've done has been worthwhile.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that.

As much as I dread it, I think I will go back to London.

Why do you dread it?

When I lived in London last I was young, fresh, I was everything.

Coming to America was such a dream, it was the icing on the cake.

Going home is defeat.

None of it really worked out the way I planned.

Most things don't work out the way people plan.

You're living in the past. You need to start thinking about your future.

Living in the past is my future. It doesn't have to be yours.

You're a man.

And you're a bore tonight.

Can't we just feel sorry for ourselves a little bit longer?

-Let's have another drink. Please?

-I don't think so. I have to go.

-Walk me out.

-No!

-Come on, I have to go.

-This was such fun!

-Come on.

-No.

When will I see you again?

-Aren't you going to England?

-No, I'll never do that!

It's far too much effort.

Besides, I don't think Jim would want me to leave you here all alone.

Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I've got all the answers. Remember?

What are you doing this weekend?

I think I might just be very quiet.

You never really did take me seriously, did you, George?

I tried to, Charly. Remember? A long time ago.

It didn't really work out, did it?

Good night, Charly.

Sleep tight.

(AMPLIFIED TICKING)

MUSIC: "Blue Moon" by Jo Stafford

Patrick! Beer and a packet of Lucky Strikes, please.

(LAUGHTER)

(HAPPY CHATTER)

Excuse me.

It's too hot in there.

Yes, it is.

-Would you like a cigarette?

-No, thanks, I don't smoke.

This place is really crowded?

Well, it is Saturday night but it's not usually as bad as this.

People normally stop by, pick someone up and head down to the beach.

(LAUGHS) Yeah. It's pretty wild out there.

I'm surprised the cops don't break it up.

Is it always like that?

Since the war ended. It's pretty great actually. Kind of pagan.

-I'm Jim.

-I'm George. Pleased to meet you, Jim.

I'm sorry, I'm supposed to meet some friends but I can't find them.

I just needed to get out of the house.

The lure of a cold beer got me.

-Do you live nearby?

-Canyon.

-Been here long?

-Since '38.

-Where are you from?

-Colorado.

I really like it here. It's close to the beach.

I think I might stay after I'm discharged.

I don't know, maybe I'm a bit of a pagan.

(RAIN STARTS)

Oh!

-After you.

-Shall we?

(JAZZ PLAYS)

Sorry.

-Well, hello.

-Hi.

Do you want to buy me a drink?

I think I'm taken.

Too bad. Too bad.

Want another beer?

(LOUD TICKING)

(SIGHS)

(RUSTLING BUSHES)

-(TV)

-'In Cuba itself, 100,000 men were put under emergency orders

'as they have been during past invasions...'

Patrick, a bottle of Scotch and a pack of Lucky Strikes to go, please.

Patrick. Cancel that.

Well, hello, Mr Potter.

Hello, sir.

-What are we drinking?

-Scotch.

OK.

I come here all the time. I live just round the corner,

-but then you knew that.

-On Camphor Tree Lane.

You're still carrying that around.

One must always appreciate life's little gifts.

So what are you doing here?

-Just out for a ride on my bike.

-That all?

I don't know.

Were you looking for me?

Maybe. I don't know.

I feel like my head's stopped up with stuff.

What kind of stuff?

Like the stuff you were talking about in class.

That is definitely not important.

No, it IS important. Your class is great.

But somehow we always seem to get stuck talking about the past.

The past just doesn't matter to me.

And the present?

I can't wait for the present to be over. It's a total drag.

(LAUGHS)

Well, tonight's the exception.

What?

Tonight, yes. The present, no. Let's drink to tonight.

-(THEY CLINK GLASSES)

-Tonight.

So if the past doesn't matter and the present's a drag,

what about the future?

What future? Cuba might just blow us up.

Death is the future.

I'm sorry. I don't mean to be depressing.

It's not depressing, it's true. It may not be your immediate future,

but it's what we all share. Death is the future.

You're right, I guess.

So if one is not enjoying one's present,

there isn't a great deal to suggest that the future should be any better.

Yeah, I've thought that before.

But the thing is, you just never know. Look at tonight.

Actually I feel really alone most of the time.

-You do?

-Yeah.

I've always felt this way. I mean, we're born alone, we die alone.

And while we're here,

we're absolutely, completely sealed in our own bodies. Really weird.

Kind of freaks me out to think about it.

We can only experience the outside world

through our own slanted perception of it.

Who knows what you're really like? I just see what I think you're like.

I'm exactly what I appear to be...

..if you look closely.

(SIGHS DEEPLY)

You know the only thing that has made the whole thing worthwhile

has been those few times

when I've been able to really, truly connect with another human being.

I had a hunch about you, sir.

You did?

Yes, sir. I had a hunch you might be a real romantic.

You know, everyone keeps telling you that when you're older,

you'll have all this experience, like it's some great thing.

Hmm, it's a load of shit.

I think I've actually got sillier and sillier.

-Really?

-Absolutely.

So all your experience is useless?

No, I wouldn't say that. In the words of our friend Mr Huxley,

"Experience is not what happens to a man,

"it's what a man does with what happens to him."

-Let's go swimming.

-OK.

-(SNICKERS)

-What?

It was a test. I thought you were bluffing about being silly,

so I said to myself,

"I'll suggest doing something completely outrageous

"and if he resists, if he even hesitates,

"then I know he's full of shit."

Well, I wasn't. Were you?

Hell, no!

Come on, sir. I'll help you down.

Let's go!

(WAVES CRASH)

Whoo!

Whoo! Come on, sir!

(BOTH SHOUT IN DELIGHT)

(WAVES GET STRONGER)

(BUBBLES)

Agh!

That's enough for now, sir.

-I'm fine.

-Well, I'm cold. Come on.

(BOTH PANT HEAVILY)

Can we go back to your place, sir?

Of course. Where else?

-Where else?

-Are you out of your mind?

What's the matter?

You can't go home like that.

We're invisible, don't you know that?

You know, sir, they ought not to let you out on your own.

You're liable to get into real trouble.

Oh, I excel at it.

Your forehead's bleeding.

The bathroom's just down the hall if you'd like to take a shower.

Aren't you taking a shower too, sir?

I'm fine. I'm English. We like to be cold and wet.

First, I think we need to take care of that cut, sir.

Do you have any Band-aids?

Going camping, sir?

I'm fine, really.

Stay there. I'll be right back.

Sit up.

Tilt your head back.

(UNWRAPS THE PLASTER)

Well, sir, I'm afraid this time you don't have the excuse of mescaline

-to explain your Band-aid.

-(CHUCKLES)

I think we should get you out of those wet clothes.

Yes, sir.

(PULLS CLOTHES OFF)

(PULLS SHOWER CURTAIN ACROSS)

(RUNNING WATER)

(STRIKES A MATCH)

(PUTS ON A JAZZ RECORD)

-You're not too cold?

-I'm great.

Would you like a drink?

I'll have a beer, sir, if you have one.

I'm afraid that's all we have.

Two beers, coming up.

You live here by yourself, sir?

I do now. I used to share this place with a friend who was an architect.

Man, guys my age dream about the kind of set-up you've got here.

I mean, what more can you want?

You get to be left alone and come and go as you please.

Is that your idea of a perfect life?

What's the matter, sir? Don't you believe me?

If you're so keen on the idea of living by yourself,

-where does Lois fit into this plan?

-Lois?

What's she got to do with anything?

I got the impression that you and she were together.

Not really. She's kind of cool and we're good friends,

but I think what you really want to ask me is if we sleep together.

-And do you?

-We did. Once.

Why only once?

I didn't say only once, I said once.

Come on, last thing I want to talk about right now is Lois.

What time is it?

Mmm, my watch seems to have stopped.

Do you want me to go?

You must be kidding! Go and get us another beer.

Is that an order, sir?

Damn right it is.

Pathetic! (BOTTLE BANGS)

Did you say something, sir?

Why are you here?

Why did you go to the office

and ask the secretary for my address?

I just wanted to see you some place other than school.

Why?

Sometimes I think I'm crazy

cos I see things so differently to everyone else.

I feel like I can talk to you.

To be honest, sir, I was also worried about you today.

Me? What's there to worry about?

I'm fine. (CHUCKLES)

I'm fine.

(CRACKLING FIRE AND RUMBLING OCEAN)

(POUNDING HEARTBEAT)

(LABOURED BREATHING)

(GASPS FOR AIR)

(LOUD TICKING)

(AMPLIFIED FLAPPING OF OWL'S WINGS)

(WAVES IN THE DISTANCE)

'A few times in my life, I've had moments of absolute clarity.

'When for a few brief seconds, the silence drowns out the noise

'and I can feel...rather than think.

'And things seem so sharp and the world seems so fresh.

'It's as though it had all just come into existence.'

(FIRE ROARS)

(EXHALES DEEPLY)

'I can never make these moments last.

'I cling to them, but, like everything, they fade.

'I have lived my life on these moments.

'They pull me back to the present.

'And I realise that everything is exactly the way it's meant to be.'

(SOLO STRINGS CRESCENDO)

(WHIMPERS IN PAIN)

(CRIES OUT IN PAIN)

CRASHES TO THE FLOOR)

(TICKING)

(TICKING STOPS SUDDENLY)

(RASPING BREATH)

'And just like that, it came.'

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd