Birdman

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This film contains very strong language and some scenes of a sexual nature	0:01:31	0:01:39
BIRDMAN: How did we end up here?	0:01:59	0:02:00
This place is horrible.	0:02:07	0:02:08
Smells like balls.	0:02:14	0:02:16
We don't belong in this shithole.	0:02:22	0:02:24
SKYPE CALL SOUNDS	0:02:24	0:02:32
-Hey, Sam. -Dad... -Hi, hon. -What kind of... Shut up!	0:02:43	0:02:45
What kind of flowers did you say you wanted?	0:02:45	0:02:47
Alchemillas. Or something that smells nice, you know.	0:02:47	0:02:50
-Something soothing. Listen, I can't... -It all smells like fucking kimchi!	0:02:50	0:02:53
OK. Something that's, uh... that looks nice. You know. Anything but roses.	0:02:53	0:02:56
-I hate this job. -OK.	0:02:56	0:02:58
Riggan, everyone's set for 1-4.	0:03:18	0:03:20
They're ready for you.	0:03:20	0:03:21
Riggan, they're ready for you.	0:03:23	0:03:25
-Mr Thomson. -Steve.	0:03:56	0:03:58
-It's Daniel. -OK.	0:03:58	0:04:00
-Oh, hey, buddy. -Hey. -How you doing?	0:04:03	0:04:05
Pretty good. Good. Yeah, I'd be a lot better if I could get, uh...	0:04:05	0:04:08
Ralph to stop, you know, acting.	0:04:08	0:04:10
He's going to be fine.	0:04:10	0:04:12
And he was yelling, "I love you, I love you, bitch!"	0:04:12	0:04:15
What do you do with a love like that?	0:04:15	0:04:17
How is that... That is not love and you know it.	0:04:17	0:04:19
Why do you insist on calling it love?	0:04:19	0:04:21
You can say what you want, but I know what it was.	0:04:21	0:04:23
What about you, Nick? Does that sound like love to you?	0:04:23	0:04:26
Sorry I'm late. Uh, sounds like love...	0:04:26	0:04:28
Look, I'm the wrong person to ask.	0:04:28	0:04:29
I only knew...heard the man's name mentioned in passing.	0:04:29	0:04:32
I wouldn't know. You'd have to know the particulars.	0:04:32	0:04:35
But I think what you're saying is love is absolute.	0:04:35	0:04:37
Yeah. The kind of love I'm talking about is...	0:04:37	0:04:40
The kind of love I'm talking about,	0:04:40	0:04:41
you don't try and kill people.	0:04:41	0:04:43
It was love, Mel. To Eddie, it was.	0:04:43	0:04:44
I don't care what anyone says.	0:04:44	0:04:46
He was ready to die for it.	0:04:46	0:04:47
Ask her what he did after she left him.	0:04:47	0:04:50
He shot himself in the mouth, but he screwed that up, too.	0:04:50	0:04:53
Poor Ed.	0:04:53	0:04:54
Poor Ed, my ass! The guy was... dangerous!	0:04:54	0:04:57
Well, how'd he screw it up, if he shot himself in the mouth?	0:04:57	0:04:59
He used to carry this .22. We lived like fugitives then.	0:04:59	0:05:02
Ralph, Ralph, Ralph.	0:05:02	0:05:04
Fugitives are...scared, you know?	0:05:04	0:05:05
Fugitives are on the run. So, you know, how many times can we get...	0:05:05	0:05:09
Can you just give me more of that? You know, fear?	0:05:09	0:05:11
Yeah. Great idea.	0:05:11	0:05:13
We lived like fugitives then.	0:05:13	0:05:15
I never knew if he was going to come out from behind a bush,	0:05:15	0:05:18
or...or a car and just start shooting.	0:05:18	0:05:20
The man was crazy! He was capable of anything!	0:05:20	0:05:23
-Christ, what a nightmare. -Yeah!	0:05:23	0:05:25
He used call me up at the hospital and say,	0:05:25	0:05:27
"Son of a bitch, your days are numbered!"	0:05:27	0:05:31
It's too much? It's a little bit too much.	0:05:33	0:05:35
I can tell, because, with you... I just want to give you a range.	0:05:35	0:05:38
Oh! Shit!	0:05:38	0:05:39
-Someone call 911! -Oh, my God! Is he breathing?	0:05:39	0:05:42
-Is that blood coming out of his ear? -It's OK, he's still breathing.	0:05:42	0:05:44
-Where are you going? -Well, did someone call 911?	0:05:44	0:05:46
-Do not move him! Wait for an ambulance! -Did someone call for help?	0:05:46	0:05:49
Well, that's going to be a fucking lawsuit!	0:05:49	0:05:51
OK, where you going? The understudy'll be ready in less than five minutes.	0:05:51	0:05:54
Forget the understudy. We have to cancel the first preview.	0:05:54	0:05:56
-But it's a full house! We would have to refund the entire... -Just do it. Just do it.	0:05:56	0:05:59
-What happened? How's Ralph? -He'll be fine.	0:05:59	0:06:01
Wait, wait, wait. Will you fucking wait?	0:06:01	0:06:03
Listen to me, Jake, it was going to be a disaster.	0:06:03	0:06:05
That guy's the worst actor I've ever seen in my life.	0:06:05	0:06:07
-The blood coming out of his ear is the most honest thing he's done so far. -He's not that bad!	0:06:07	0:06:11
OK, he's fucking terrible. But listen.	0:06:11	0:06:14
You have the press in your dressing room in a few hours.	0:06:14	0:06:17
I'll make something up. I don't know. I'll think of something. I'll riff. Listen. Hold on.	0:06:17	0:06:22
That wasn't an accident.	0:06:22	0:06:23
What do you mean?	0:06:25	0:06:27
I made it happen.	0:06:27	0:06:28
Oh, OK.	0:06:28	0:06:30
Are you drunk?	0:06:30	0:06:32
Just find me an actor - a good actor. Give me, uh... Woody Harrelson!	0:06:32	0:06:35
He's doing the next Hunger Games.	0:06:35	0:06:37
Um, uh, Michael Fassbender.	0:06:37	0:06:38
He's doing the prequel to the X-Men prequel.	0:06:38	0:06:40
-How about, um, uh, Jeremy Renner? -Who?	0:06:40	0:06:42
Jeremy Renner! He was nominated. The... He was the Hurt Locker guy.	0:06:42	0:06:46
He's an Avenger.	0:06:46	0:06:48
Fuck! They put him in a cape, too? God! I can't believe this! I don't care.	0:06:48	0:06:52
Just find me someone.	0:06:52	0:06:53
Ralph will sue us. He'll sue us and he has a case.	0:06:55	0:06:58
Just make it go away.	0:07:01	0:07:02
Look, you're my attorney. You're my producer. You're my best friend. Right?	0:07:02	0:07:07
Now, go out there and do what you were born to do. I don't care how you do it, just go.	0:07:07	0:07:11
How do you suppose I do that? How...	0:07:11	0:07:13
When we come back, an exclusive interview with Robert Downey Jr,	0:07:15	0:07:18
who's busy following up his billion-dollar Iron Man franchise	0:07:18	0:07:22
with the equally successful Avengers series. He will take us behind the scene...	0:07:22	0:07:26
BIRDMAN: That clown doesn't have half your talent,	0:07:34	0:07:37
and he's making a fortune in that Tin Man get-up.	0:07:37	0:07:41
We were the real thing, Riggan.	0:07:42	0:07:44
We had it all.	0:07:46	0:07:48
We gave it away.	0:07:48	0:07:50
Breathing in.	0:07:50	0:07:52
We handed these poseurs the keys to the kingdom.	0:07:52	0:07:55
Breathing out.	0:07:55	0:07:56
You listening to me?	0:07:56	0:07:57
Breathing in, I embrace my anger.	0:07:58	0:08:01
Yeah, embrace it.	0:08:01	0:08:03
But I'm not going away. You know I'm right.	0:08:03	0:08:06
Look at that.	0:08:33	0:08:35
These people don't know what you're capable of.	0:08:36	0:08:40
SOUND OF SMASHING	0:08:40	0:08:41
Why would somebody go from playing	0:08:45	0:08:48
the lead in a comic book franchise	0:08:48	0:08:51
to adapting Raymond Carver for the stage?	0:08:51	0:08:55
As you're probably aware, Barthes said,	0:08:55	0:08:58
"The cultural work done in the past by gods and epic sagas	0:08:58	0:09:02
"is now being done by laundry detergent commercials	0:09:02	0:09:06
"and comic strip characters."	0:09:06	0:09:09
This is a big leap you've taken.	0:09:09	0:09:11
Yeah, it is. Absolutely. Absolutely.	0:09:11	0:09:14
And, you know, like you said...	0:09:14	0:09:16
..that, uh, Barthes said, uh...	0:09:16	0:09:20
..Birdman, like Icarus...	0:09:20	0:09:21
OK, w-w-w-w-wait. Hang on. Who is this Barthes guy?	0:09:21	0:09:24
Which Birdman was he in?	0:09:24	0:09:25
Uh, Roland Barthes was a French philosopher,	0:09:25	0:09:28
and if you knew anything about the history of...	0:09:28	0:09:30
Now, is it true you've been injecting yourself with semen from baby pigs?	0:09:30	0:09:35
-I'm sorry, what? -As a method of facial rejuvenation?	0:09:35	0:09:37
Where did you read that?	0:09:37	0:09:38
It was tweeted by @prostatewhispers.	0:09:38	0:09:41
-No. That's not true. -I know, but did you do it?	0:09:41	0:09:43
-No, I didn't do it. I just said it's not true. -OK, I'll write you're denying it.	0:09:43	0:09:47
No! Don't write anything. Why would you write anything? I didn't...I didn't do...	0:09:47	0:09:50
Don't write what she said. I didn't do it. I didn't put any baby pig sem...	0:09:50	0:09:53
Are you at all afraid that, uh, people will say you're doing this play	0:09:53	0:09:57
to battle the impression that you're a washed-up superhero?	0:09:57	0:10:00
No, absolutely not. Absolutely not. That's why,	0:10:00	0:10:02
20 years ago, I said no to Birdman 4. That's why...	0:10:02	0:10:06
Oh!	0:10:06	0:10:08
Birdman 4? You do Birdman 4?!	0:10:08	0:10:10
Thank you for coming out. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.	0:10:10	0:10:13
We're expecting some great pieces.	0:10:13	0:10:16
The guys in publicity...	0:10:16	0:10:18
..now want a Times feature,	0:10:18	0:10:20
which is the worst idea right now.	0:10:20	0:10:23
What are you doing?	0:10:26	0:10:27
-I don't want to look at this any more. -That was a present from the crew.	0:10:27	0:10:30
Don't fuck with those guys, they're union.	0:10:30	0:10:32
I don't care.	0:10:32	0:10:34
-How'd it go? -Good.	0:10:34	0:10:36
They talk about Ralph at all? He did it, you know.	0:10:36	0:10:38
The motherfucker did it. Threatened to sue us. Didn't even wait to get out of the hospital.	0:10:38	0:10:42
-What'd you say? -What'd I say?	0:10:42	0:10:43
I said, "You motherfucker, are you threatening me?	0:10:43	0:10:46
"I swear to God, if I so much as get a letter from a lawyer,	0:10:46	0:10:48
"then the press is going to get the pictures off your computer." That's what I said.	0:10:48	0:10:51
What pictures?	0:10:51	0:10:52
He has a thing for nuns... in diapers.	0:10:52	0:10:55
Why do you care? You shouldn't have any knowledge of that, anyway. Point is is I made it go away.	0:10:55	0:10:59
That's right. That's great.	0:10:59	0:11:01
-Yeah, it is fantastic, except for one thing. -What?	0:11:01	0:11:03
-We don't have an actor. -Uh-huh.	0:11:03	0:11:05
And if we cancel the first preview, the press is going to smell blood.	0:11:05	0:11:08
And we can't afford to lose any more money. At all.	0:11:08	0:11:10
OK. What do you think I should do?	0:11:10	0:11:11
Well, we hired an understudy.	0:11:11	0:11:13
-Let's use the understudy. -No.	0:11:13	0:11:15
Riggan, listen to me. Please, for the love of God, listen.	0:11:15	0:11:17
Our perfect dream actor is not going to knock on that door and go,	0:11:17	0:11:20
"Hey, fellas, when do I start?" You know?	0:11:20	0:11:22
KNOCK ON DOOR	0:11:22	0:11:24
-Can I talk to you for a second? -Yeah. What's up?	0:11:24	0:11:26
-Did you find another actor? -No.	0:11:26	0:11:27
-OK, well, Mike's available. -He is? -Mike who?	0:11:27	0:11:30
-I thought he was doing the thing... -He was.	0:11:30	0:11:32
-He quit. Or got fired. -Mike who?	0:11:32	0:11:34
-Which is it, quit or fired? -Well, with Mike, it's usually both.	0:11:34	0:11:37
-Mike fucking who? -Shiner.	0:11:37	0:11:38
-Yes! -Jake.	0:11:38	0:11:40
Oh, my gosh! How do you know Mike Shiner?	0:11:40	0:11:42
-We share a vagina. -You think he'd want to do it? -Mm-hm.	0:11:42	0:11:44
-How do you know? -Cos he told me he'd want to do it.	0:11:44	0:11:46
Jake. Jake, yes.	0:11:46	0:11:48
-Ask me if he sells tickets. -Fine. Does he sell tickets?	0:11:48	0:11:51
He sells a shitload of tickets. Now ask me if the theatre critics love him.	0:11:51	0:11:54
Do theatre critics love him?	0:11:54	0:11:55
-They want to spooge on him. -Hey!	0:11:55	0:11:57
-Lesley. -Right on his face.	0:11:57	0:11:58
-Everything for a reason, right? -You think he'd come in this evening?	0:11:58	0:12:01
I'll call him and find out.	0:12:01	0:12:03
I'll call his agent.	0:12:03	0:12:05
Amazing, amazing.	0:12:05	0:12:06
Annie? Clear the theatre, send everyone to dinner	0:12:14	0:12:17
and give me some lights!	0:12:17	0:12:19
We got a put-in tonight.	0:12:19	0:12:20
Who is it?	0:12:20	0:12:21
You'll find out.	0:12:21	0:12:23
Intimidating, isn't it?	0:12:35	0:12:37
You have any idea of the people who have	0:12:37	0:12:39
walked on these boards... before you?	0:12:39	0:12:43
Geraldine Page. Helen Hayes.	0:12:43	0:12:45
Jason Robards. Marlon Brando. And now Riggan Thomson.	0:12:45	0:12:50
-Hey, thanks for coming in on such short notice, Mike. I really appreciate it. -This is what I do.	0:12:50	0:12:54
You-you-you wrote this adaptation?	0:12:54	0:12:56
I did, yeah.	0:12:56	0:12:57
And you're directing and starring in your adaptation? That's ambitious.	0:12:57	0:13:00
Well, thanks.	0:13:00	0:13:02
Well, it's a good theatre.	0:13:02	0:13:05
I can't speak for your play, but... let's, uh...let's do a little bit of it. Yeah?	0:13:05	0:13:08
Oh, I didn't expect you to come in and, you know, just jump right in.	0:13:08	0:13:11
It's first preview tomorrow night, man. Let's get to work.	0:13:11	0:13:13
OK. Well, you know, look...you know, feel free to take the script up until you feel comfortable.	0:13:13	0:13:17
No, no, no, let's just...let's just do...do some of it.	0:13:17	0:13:20
All right! OK, uh...	0:13:20	0:13:22
Hey, take a look at page 20.	0:13:22	0:13:23
-I...I'm good. I don't need that. -What?	0:13:23	0:13:25
-I don't need the script. Just give me a cue. -What are you talking about?	0:13:25	0:13:28
-Feed me a line. -Wha... H-h-how are you going to... -Feed me a line.	0:13:28	0:13:31
OK! All right.	0:13:31	0:13:32
OK, uh...let me think. Uh...yeah... Uh...	0:13:32	0:13:36
Hey, I'm the wrong person to ask, OK. I didn't actually know the man.	0:13:36	0:13:39
-I only heard his name mentioned in passing. -Mmm-hmm.	0:13:39	0:13:41
I don't know. You'd have to know the particulars.	0:13:41	0:13:43
But I think what you're saying is love is absolute.	0:13:43	0:13:47
Is that what I'm saying? Am I saying love is absolute?	0:13:47	0:13:50
Yes. OK, yeah! The kind of love	0:13:50	0:13:52
that I'm talking about is absolute.	0:13:52	0:13:54
The kind of love that I'm talking about, you don't try to kill people!	0:13:54	0:13:58
How do you know the lines?	0:13:58	0:14:00
-It's a thing I have. I don't know, it's a gift. -Wow. OK, so, that's, uh...	0:14:00	0:14:04
Oh, come on, man. I've been helping Lesley get off book for, like, a month.	0:14:04	0:14:07
-Oh, right! Right. Right, right, right. -These lines are right here. That makes sense.	0:14:07	0:14:10
-That's good. Give me my cue again. -OK.	0:14:10	0:14:12
Hey, I'm the wrong person to ask. I didn't actually know the man.	0:14:12	0:14:14
I've heard his name mentioned in passing. But, yeah, I didn't know...	0:14:14	0:14:17
You never know the particulars. I think what you're saying...	0:14:17	0:14:20
-C-can I make a suggestion? -Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure.	0:14:20	0:14:22
-Do you mind? -No, no, no, not at all.	0:14:22	0:14:23
No, no, forget...forget that. Just...stay with me.	0:14:23	0:14:27
"I'm the wrong person to ask," he says, but what...what is that? What's the intention in that?	0:14:27	0:14:31
Is he fed up with the subject so he's changing it?	0:14:31	0:14:33
Is he deflecting guilt over the marriage?	0:14:33	0:14:34
And here's the thing, you've got four lines after that	0:14:34	0:14:37
that all say the same thing. "I didn't even know the man."	0:14:37	0:14:40
"I only heard his name mentioned in passing."	0:14:40	0:14:42
"I wouldn't Know."	0:14:42	0:14:43
"You'd have to know the particulars."	0:14:43	0:14:45
And the "particulars", I mean, it sounds like my grandmother. But...but...	0:14:45	0:14:48
..the point is, you don't know the guy. We fucking get it.	0:14:48	0:14:51
Make it work with one line.	0:14:51	0:14:52
"I didn't even know the man." Right?	0:14:52	0:14:54
Wait... I-I-I... You know my lines, too, huh?	0:14:54	0:14:57
-Can we not get hung up on knowing lines? -Yeah, yeah, yeah.	0:14:57	0:15:00
Can we just work on this? Tear it apart?	0:15:00	0:15:02
So, why don't you just give me that same thing again,	0:15:02	0:15:04
-but cut it down. Try it. -OK. Uh...	0:15:04	0:15:06
Hey, I'm the wrong person to ask.	0:15:06	0:15:08
Oh, no! But that's the thing, see? "I'm the wrong person to ask." What is it?	0:15:08	0:15:11
I think it's, "Fuck you."	0:15:11	0:15:12
"Fuck you. Don't put me on the spot, man."	0:15:12	0:15:15
"Don't make me feel self-conscious about my marriage	0:15:15	0:15:17
"while my life...my wife is sitting..."	0:15:17	0:15:19
-Right there. -"..right there."	0:15:19	0:15:21
-Can I sit down for this? -Yeah, sit, sit. Good idea. Yeah.	0:15:21	0:15:24
So just give it to me as a "fuck you". Try it. Lay it on me.	0:15:24	0:15:28
Just do it. Come on. Give it to me.	0:15:28	0:15:29
-Well, I'm thinking. -Fuck me hard. Just give it.	0:15:29	0:15:31
Come on! Don't talk about it! Just do it!	0:15:31	0:15:33
Hey, I'm the wrong person to ask, all right?!	0:15:33	0:15:35
I don't even know the guy, OK? What's your point?!	0:15:35	0:15:37
-What's my point? -Yeah, what's your point? What are you saying? Spit it out! -Oh! Oh!	0:15:37	0:15:40
You're saying what? What are you saying? You're saying love is absolute.	0:15:40	0:15:43
Yes! Yes!	0:15:43	0:15:45
The kind of love that I'm talking about, it is absolute!	0:15:45	0:15:48
The kind of love that I'm talking about, you don't...	0:15:48	0:15:51
..you don't try to kill people.	0:15:52	0:15:54
Yeah. Good.	0:15:57	0:15:59
-I don't know, what do you think, boss? -Wow. OK.	0:15:59	0:16:01
You want to do this with me?	0:16:01	0:16:04
What do you think?	0:16:04	0:16:05
Everybody's back. Larry needs to see him for a fitting.	0:16:05	0:16:08
I'll take that as a yes.	0:16:08	0:16:09
So, who are you?	0:16:13	0:16:15
-That's Sam, my daughter. -Oh.	0:16:15	0:16:17
Your daughter! Wow! That's amazing. You don't look anything like each other.	0:16:17	0:16:20
-What do you do? -Um... -She's my assistant. Works with me.	0:16:20	0:16:23
And does she talk, uh...and speak?	0:16:23	0:16:26
She does. Yeah.	0:16:26	0:16:28
She can even sit or stay or roll over, if you have any treats.	0:16:28	0:16:32
Hey, welcome aboard, Mike!	0:16:32	0:16:33
Thank you, Captain.	0:16:33	0:16:34
Um, I'm Mike...Shiner, by the way.	0:16:35	0:16:38
Oh, I know who you are.	0:16:38	0:16:39
I, uh, I saw you in Hothouse at the Geffen.	0:16:39	0:16:43
You were great.	0:16:43	0:16:44
Oh, thank you. Your ass is great.	0:16:44	0:16:47
Dude. Seriously?	0:16:47	0:16:49
You see..that was just me...	0:16:50	0:16:52
Larry? Larry?	0:16:52	0:16:54
This is the theatre, sweetheart. Don't be so self-conscious.	0:16:54	0:16:57
He's here.	0:16:57	0:16:58
OK. Thank the Lord and pass the biscuits. I finally have an actor to dress.	0:16:58	0:17:01
How have you been, Larry?	0:17:01	0:17:03
Better now that you're here. Take off your clothes.	0:17:03	0:17:05
You're just going to stand there?	0:17:08	0:17:09
This is the theatre, honey. Don't be so self-conscious.	0:17:09	0:17:12
We have to start from scratch with less than 24 hours.	0:17:12	0:17:16
Here. Try these.	0:17:16	0:17:17
Holy sh...! What's happening? Where are your underpants?	0:17:17	0:17:20
Under the bed at home, I think.	0:17:20	0:17:22
OK. Uh...	0:17:22	0:17:24
No. OK, OK. Everything's too small.	0:17:24	0:17:27
-You're not kidding. -Oh.	0:17:27	0:17:29
Whoa. That's nice.	0:17:29	0:17:30
Forgive him, Larry. Mike's like my five-year-old son.	0:17:30	0:17:33
Neither of them has clean underwear.	0:17:33	0:17:34
Or pubic hair, I imagine. OK...	0:17:34	0:17:37
I can alter the suit.	0:17:37	0:17:38
But we're going to have to make new trousers and shirts.	0:17:38	0:17:40
And underwear.	0:17:40	0:17:42
-What are you doing? -Waiting on Larry.	0:17:43	0:17:45
I'm finished!	0:17:45	0:17:46
Then I'm just standing with my cock out.	0:17:46	0:17:48
Well, get dressed.	0:17:48	0:17:50
Riggan's daughter's hanging around and I don't need her to walk in here.	0:17:50	0:17:52
-Lesley. -No, Mike. You haven't seen her.	0:17:52	0:17:54
She's always hanging around, watching everyone, like Little Miss Creepy.	0:17:54	0:17:57
-Les... -I don't know if it's the drugs that fried her brain or what,	0:17:57	0:18:00
but I just don't want her running to her father, saying you showed her your junk.	0:18:00	0:18:04
Then we should ask her to leave.	0:18:04	0:18:05
-Oh, God. Really? -Mmm-hmm.	0:18:06	0:18:08
-Sammy? -It's Sam.	0:18:08	0:18:10
Sam. Lesley.	0:18:10	0:18:12
Listen, um, when I said that I...	0:18:12	0:18:14
Oh, don't worry about it. He's a handful, huh?	0:18:14	0:18:17
How is it that you always manage to find a new way to humiliate me?	0:18:19	0:18:22
Oh, to be fair, you make it really easy.	0:18:22	0:18:24
What the hell was she doing here?	0:18:24	0:18:26
-She brought me down. -And stayed?	0:18:26	0:18:28
-Well, she is a little... something. -Listen, Mike.	0:18:28	0:18:30
This is Broadway. And I'm here, finally.	0:18:30	0:18:33
Now, please, just do me a favour, I'm begging you.	0:18:33	0:18:35
Don't fuck it up!	0:18:35	0:18:37
Lesley.	0:18:37	0:18:38
Come here. Come here.	0:18:40	0:18:41
Play with my balls.	0:18:45	0:18:46
-Don't do it. Ow! -Just sign it.	0:18:48	0:18:50
-Listen. -No, you listen to me! -I can't afford to listen to you.	0:18:50	0:18:52
-I'm going to have to go shopping again. -Just sew something, you old fuck!	0:18:52	0:18:55
-Give him whatever he wants! -He just asked for four times what we were paying what's-his-name!	0:18:55	0:18:59
-Go into the reserve, Jake. -The reserve is gone! We spent it on fog and those fake trees.	0:18:59	0:19:02
-It's a dream sequence, Jake. -And goddam midgets!	0:19:02	0:19:04
-Hey, don't say... You're not allowed to say "midgets" any more. -The reserve is gone!	0:19:04	0:19:09
You didn't see what I just saw.	0:19:11	0:19:13
I'm telling you, this guy's the real deal.	0:19:13	0:19:15
I can feel it in my bones.	0:19:15	0:19:16
He's the actor we've been waiting for.	0:19:16	0:19:18
Come on. Just get the contract done.	0:19:18	0:19:20
Please, Jake. I'll get the money.	0:19:20	0:19:22
-OK, I'll do it. -OK.	0:19:23	0:19:26
Get that smile off your face. You're freaking me out.	0:19:26	0:19:28
Sorry. You're right.	0:19:28	0:19:30
Hey!	0:19:30	0:19:31
Is it true? Shiner?	0:19:31	0:19:33
-Holy shit. When can I meet him? -He's in a fitting with Larry right now.	0:19:33	0:19:35
-Hey, guys. I'm going to Starbucks. You want anything? -I'm good. I'm good.	0:19:35	0:19:39
She has a great ass. Hey, I have some news for you, too.	0:19:39	0:19:41
Is it good or is it bad? Cos, right now, I really...	0:19:41	0:19:43
I missed my last two periods.	0:19:43	0:19:46
I think it's really happening.	0:19:46	0:19:49
Wow.	0:19:49	0:19:50
Is that good or bad? Riggan!	0:19:50	0:19:52
It's good. It's good. It's great.	0:19:52	0:19:54
-Well, say something else. -Um...OK.	0:19:54	0:19:57
Uh...	0:19:57	0:19:58
You sure it's mine?	0:19:58	0:20:00
Well, you know, there's you, there's Jake, you know, that masseur wore a condom...	0:20:00	0:20:04
Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's yours, yeah.	0:20:04	0:20:06
Idiot.	0:20:06	0:20:07
-Are you excited? -Yeah.	0:20:10	0:20:13
Me, too.	0:20:13	0:20:14
-What? -You're not funny!	0:20:18	0:20:20
What? Hey, what?	0:20:23	0:20:25
First preview tomorrow.	0:20:41	0:20:43
Here we go.	0:20:45	0:20:46
I rode with him in the ambulance to the hospital.	0:20:50	0:20:52
I will never get that image out of my head.	0:20:52	0:20:55
Right before he did it, those eyes were so sad and...and lonely.	0:20:55	0:20:59
Did you have to treat him?	0:20:59	0:21:01
I didn't have to, but I did.	0:21:01	0:21:03
Music out. Cue 34, 35, ready.	0:21:03	0:21:06
He was in terrible shape.	0:21:06	0:21:08
His head had swelled up. It was twice the size of a normal head.	0:21:08	0:21:10
-He's good, huh? -He's incredible.	0:21:10	0:21:13
-I think he's drinking real gin. -What?	0:21:13	0:21:16
Ask...ask Nick. I...I want you to ask Nick if he thinks that that's love.	0:21:17	0:21:21
Oh, honey, can't we just go to dinner?	0:21:21	0:21:23
Mel, don't get him started.	0:21:23	0:21:25
You don't know how he's been lately.	0:21:25	0:21:28
He's been depressed. I've been worried about him.	0:21:28	0:21:30
You've been what?	0:21:30	0:21:31
Let me tell you...let me tell you guys something about real love. I'll tell you something.	0:21:32	0:21:37
We all should be ashamed when we talk like we know what we're talking about	0:21:37	0:21:41
when we talk about love.	0:21:41	0:21:42
Oh, for God's sake, are you getting drunk?	0:21:42	0:21:45
I don't have to be drunk to say what I think.	0:21:45	0:21:46
-Nobody's drunk. We're just having a few drinks. -Exactly.	0:21:46	0:21:49
You've had more than a few.	0:21:49	0:21:51
What, are you counting?	0:21:51	0:21:52
Leave her alone. If you're not drunk, don't talk like you're drunk.	0:21:52	0:21:55
Shut up!	0:21:55	0:21:56
Do me a favour. For once in your life,	0:21:58	0:22:00
honest to God, shut up for a minute.	0:22:00	0:22:02
Anyway, like I was saying...	0:22:04	0:22:07
..you want to know about real love, there's this old couple...	0:22:07	0:22:10
..had a car wreck out on the Interstate.	0:22:11	0:22:13
Some drunk kid...ploughed his old man's pick-up...	0:22:14	0:22:19
..right into their camper.	0:22:19	0:22:21
By the time I got down to the hospital, this kid,	0:22:21	0:22:23
this fucking teenager, was dead.	0:22:23	0:22:26
So we took the old couple up to the OR.	0:22:27	0:22:29
We worked like hell on them through most of the night.	0:22:29	0:22:32
By the time...we were done with them, we just, you know...	0:22:34	0:22:38
..wrapped them...in their full body casts.	0:22:38	0:22:41
The husband, the old man...	0:22:43	0:22:45
..was depressed for the longest time.	0:22:47	0:22:49
Even after I said to him,	0:22:49	0:22:50
"Look, your wife's going to pull through," he was still depressed.	0:22:50	0:22:54
So I went up to the mouth hole and I asked him.	0:22:55	0:22:59
And he told me it was because he couldn't...see her...	0:23:01	0:23:05
..through the eyes. Couldn't see his wife.	0:23:05	0:23:08
Can you imagine?	0:23:09	0:23:11
I'm telling you, this guy's heart was breaking because...	0:23:11	0:23:15
..he couldn't turn his goddamn head	0:23:16	0:23:19
and just look at his goddamn wife.	0:23:19	0:23:21
Shit!	0:23:21	0:23:22
I mean, it was killing this guy.	0:23:24	0:23:25
I...I am so tired of this. Is this water?	0:23:25	0:23:27
It was killing the guy.	0:23:27	0:23:28
Did you replace my gin with water, man?	0:23:28	0:23:33
-GLASS SMASHES -Oh!	0:23:33	0:23:34
-Mike, come on. -No! Come on what? -Come on. You're drunk.	0:23:34	0:23:37
I'm drunk? Yes, I'm drunk. I'm supposed to be drunk! Why aren't you drunk?	0:23:37	0:23:40
This is Carver! He left a piece of his liver on the table every time he wrote a fucking page!	0:23:40	0:23:44
If I need to be drinking gin, who the fuck are you to touch my gin, man?	0:23:44	0:23:47
You fucked with the period, you fucked with the plot so you could have the best lines.	0:23:47	0:23:51
You leave me the fucking tools that I need!	0:23:51	0:23:54
Oh, come on, people, don't be so pathetic.	0:23:54	0:23:56
Stop looking at the world through your cellphone screen!	0:23:56	0:23:59
Have a real experience!	0:23:59	0:24:00
Does anybody give a shit about truth other than me?	0:24:00	0:24:03
I mean, this set is fake, the bananas are fake.	0:24:03	0:24:05
There's fucking nothing in this milk carton!	0:24:05	0:24:07
Your performance is fake!	0:24:07	0:24:09
The only thing that's real on this stage is this chicken!	0:24:09	0:24:12
So, I'm going to work with the chicken.	0:24:12	0:24:15
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND WHISTLES	0:24:15	0:24:18
That was interesting.	0:24:18	0:24:19
-Bring the curtain down. -Hey!	0:24:19	0:24:20
That's good bird, man!	0:24:20	0:24:23
Get him out of here!	0:24:23	0:24:24
How do you want me to do that?	0:24:24	0:24:26
Hey, hey, wait.	0:24:28	0:24:29
-I want him gone. -No!	0:24:29	0:24:31
-What? -We cannot do that!	0:24:31	0:24:33
Of course we can do that! It's our show!	0:24:33	0:24:34
-Listen to me, please. -No, you listen to me.	0:24:34	0:24:37
Get him the fuck out of my play. I'm not going to stand up there.	0:24:37	0:24:39
It was a preview! Nobody gives a shit about a preview!	0:24:39	0:24:42
Nothing matters until that old bat from	0:24:42	0:24:43
the New York Times is sitting on that audience opening night!	0:24:43	0:24:46
We're getting rid of him. I don't give a shit.	0:24:46	0:24:47
Shut up! Shut up and listen to me for once!	0:24:47	0:24:50
As soon as we announced he was taking over, the advance doubled, and that took less than a day.	0:24:50	0:24:54
We can't afford to lose the preview.	0:24:54	0:24:55
We can't afford to lose any more money and we can't afford to lose Mike.	0:24:55	0:24:58
This has been about... This is about being respected and validated, remember?	0:24:58	0:25:02
That's what you told me!	0:25:02	0:25:03
That's how you got me into this shit!	0:25:03	0:25:06
Now, you're the director. Get him under control, OK?	0:25:08	0:25:11
Fuck.	0:25:13	0:25:15
This isn't the '90s any more.	0:25:15	0:25:16
Your zipper's down.	0:25:18	0:25:20
Fuck.	0:25:24	0:25:25
Hey!	0:25:29	0:25:31
You were really good, cabron.	0:25:31	0:25:34
Mmm-hmm.	0:25:35	0:25:37
Hey! Out in front of the theatre in ten minutes!	0:25:38	0:25:41
Don't overthink it.	0:25:41	0:25:42
What the hell was going on up there?	0:25:54	0:25:56
I didn't know you were here tonight.	0:25:58	0:26:00
That guy's an asshole, huh?	0:26:00	0:26:02
Yeah. What are you...what are you doing here?	0:26:02	0:26:04
Sam and I are going to grab a bite after she's finished.	0:26:04	0:26:07
No, no, I mean here now.	0:26:07	0:26:09
Well, I know how much this means to you.	0:26:09	0:26:12
Oh.	0:26:12	0:26:13
Thanks. I appreciate that.	0:26:13	0:26:16
So, what's happening?	0:26:16	0:26:17
-With the play? You saw what's ha... -No, no. You and Sam.	0:26:17	0:26:20
Oh, it's... You know, it's great.	0:26:20	0:26:23
It's the same.	0:26:23	0:26:25
Do you talk to her?	0:26:25	0:26:26
Yeah, we talk.	0:26:26	0:26:28
You know, it's just been so crazy around here, you know?	0:26:28	0:26:31
-You understand where her head is at these days? -Yeah, of course.	0:26:31	0:26:34
She's trying to stay away from everything and everyone	0:26:34	0:26:36
-that got her into rehab in the first place. -Yeah, yeah.	0:26:36	0:26:39
I know. I really do. I get it. I get it.	0:26:39	0:26:42
That's all she's had, so she's confused.	0:26:42	0:26:44
Yeah, I get it.	0:26:44	0:26:45
Look, I know you're caught up in all this stuff, but you just have to...	0:26:45	0:26:48
-"Stuff"? -Uh...uh...	0:26:48	0:26:49
You know what I mean.	0:26:49	0:26:51
Riggan, you don't have to be a great father right now.	0:26:52	0:26:54
You just have to be one.	0:26:54	0:26:56
Oh, sorry.	0:26:56	0:26:58
How's that going?	0:27:01	0:27:02
I'd rather not talk about that.	0:27:04	0:27:05
You're drinking?	0:27:05	0:27:07
Yeah, I'm having a beer.	0:27:07	0:27:08
So...	0:27:12	0:27:13
..what's going on with you?	0:27:15	0:27:17
Me? Oh...	0:27:17	0:27:18
Nothing.	0:27:19	0:27:21
Everything's the same, I guess.	0:27:21	0:27:23
I'm going back to teaching.	0:27:25	0:27:27
Oh, yeah? Hey, uh...	0:27:27	0:27:30
..I'm thinking of refinancing the Malibu house.	0:27:30	0:27:33
What? I'm sorry?	0:27:33	0:27:35
I'm thinking of refinancing...	0:27:35	0:27:36
No, I heard you. I just need a second.	0:27:36	0:27:39
That's going to be Sam's house.	0:27:40	0:27:42
Why would you...? For this play?	0:27:42	0:27:45
I need the money.	0:27:47	0:27:49
Do you have any idea how crazy that sounds?	0:27:49	0:27:52
What do you want me to say? My health lasted longer than the money.	0:27:52	0:27:56
Go figure that out.	0:27:56	0:27:57
What's going on?	0:27:58	0:28:00
Riggan, look at me.	0:28:01	0:28:04
Uh...	0:28:04	0:28:05
I got a chance to do something right.	0:28:08	0:28:10
I got to take it. I got to.	0:28:14	0:28:16
It's funny. I was sitting here, waiting for you...	0:28:18	0:28:20
..and, all of a sudden, I couldn't remember why we broke up.	0:28:20	0:28:24
You know, the last time I flew here from LA,	0:28:28	0:28:31
George Clooney was sitting, like, two seats in front of me	0:28:31	0:28:35
with a nice pair of cufflinks and that fucking chin.	0:28:35	0:28:38
We ended up flying through this really, really horrible storm.	0:28:38	0:28:43
I mean, the plane was, like, rattling and shaking.	0:28:43	0:28:47
And, uh, all the people on board were, you know, crying.	0:28:47	0:28:50
I mean, crying. Praying, right?	0:28:50	0:28:53
I just sat there.	0:28:54	0:28:56
They're crying, I sit there.	0:28:56	0:28:58
And I'm thinking, "Oh, boy,	0:28:58	0:29:01
"next morning, when Sam looks at the paper,	0:29:01	0:29:05
"it's going to be Clooney's face on the front page, not mine."	0:29:05	0:29:09
You know? Boom!	0:29:09	0:29:10
Did you know Farrah Fawcett died	0:29:16	0:29:18
the exact same day as Michael Jackson?	0:29:18	0:29:21
Is that crazy?	0:29:21	0:29:23
Why did we break up?	0:29:38	0:29:40
Because you threw a kitchen knife at me	0:29:40	0:29:42
and, an hour later, you were telling me how much you loved me.	0:29:42	0:29:46
You know, just because I didn't like that ridiculous comedy you did with Goldie Hawn	0:29:46	0:29:50
did not mean that I did not love you.	0:29:50	0:29:52
That's what you always do.	0:29:52	0:29:54
You confuse love for admiration.	0:29:54	0:29:56
It's your house, you do what you want with it.	0:29:58	0:29:59
You just make sure you're there for our daughter.	0:29:59	0:30:02
I will.	0:30:02	0:30:03
You're not Farrah Fawcett, Riggan.	0:30:04	0:30:06
-BIRDMAN: -We should have done that reality show they offered us - The Thomsons.	0:30:09	0:30:12
Shut up.	0:30:12	0:30:13
-That would've been good. -Shut up!	0:30:13	0:30:15
Crazy, druggy, wise-ass daughter, MILF-y wife with the perky tits.	0:30:15	0:30:19
People would've wanted to see that.	0:30:19	0:30:21
-Shut up. -More than I can say for this piece of shit.	0:30:21	0:30:23
Shut up!	0:30:23	0:30:25
The sunbed is here.	0:30:27	0:30:29
What does that mean?	0:30:29	0:30:30
It means there's a sunbed out there being delivered to in here.	0:30:30	0:30:34
Who ordered a sunbed?	0:30:34	0:30:36
Mike. He said it's for his character -	0:30:36	0:30:37
-part of his process and that shit. -Fuck.	0:30:37	0:30:39
He said he has to be a redneck.	0:30:39	0:30:42
Son of a bitch.	0:30:42	0:30:43
Let's go. Walk.	0:30:48	0:30:50
-Where are we going? -To get you some coffee.	0:30:50	0:30:52
-Did I do something to disrespect you? -Not yet.	0:30:52	0:30:54
-I have a lot riding on this fucking play. -Oh, is that right?	0:30:54	0:30:57
Yeah. People know who I am, and...	0:30:57	0:30:59
Bullshit. They don't know you, your work, man.	0:30:59	0:31:02
They know the guy from the birdsuit who goes and tells coy, slightly vomitous stories on Letterman.	0:31:02	0:31:06
Well, I'm sorry if I'm popular, Mike.	0:31:06	0:31:08
Popular? I don't give a shit. Popular?!	0:31:08	0:31:10
Popularity is the slutty little cousin of prestige, my friend.	0:31:10	0:31:14
OK, I don't even know what the fuck that means, so...	0:31:14	0:31:17
It-it-it means...it means my reputation is riding on this, and that's worth a...a...	0:31:17	0:31:21
-A lot. -..a lot, exactly! Fuck you. Yes!	0:31:21	0:31:24
If this doesn't work out for you,	0:31:24	0:31:26
you fuck off back to your studio pals	0:31:26	0:31:28
and dive back into that cultural genocide you guys are perpetrating.	0:31:28	0:31:31
You know, a douchebag's born every minute!	0:31:31	0:31:33
That was PT Barnum's premise, when he invented the circus,	0:31:33	0:31:35
and nothing much has changed. And you guys know that, if you crank out any toxic piece crap,	0:31:35	0:31:39
people will line up and pay to see it!	0:31:39	0:31:41
But long after you're gone, I'm going to be on that stage,	0:31:41	0:31:44
earning my living, baring my soul,	0:31:44	0:31:46
wrestling with complex human emotions, cos that's what we do.	0:31:46	0:31:49
Oh, so that... Is that what tonight was about? You wrestling with complex emotion?	0:31:49	0:31:53
Tonight was about seeing if it's even alive, seeing if it can bleed.	0:31:53	0:31:56
This isn't a backlot, Riggan, this is New York City. This is how we do things.	0:31:56	0:32:01
Where you going?	0:32:01	0:32:02
They have coffee here.	0:32:02	0:32:04
Thanks, Tommy.	0:32:12	0:32:13
They were laughing in our fucking faces.	0:32:13	0:32:14
Tonight they were laughing, tomorrow they'll be tweeting.	0:32:14	0:32:17
Fuck 'em! Who cares?	0:32:17	0:32:18
These are the people who pay half price	0:32:18	0:32:20
to watch us rehearse. Stop fucking caring.	0:32:20	0:32:22
This play's a drama. We're doing Raymond Carver. This play's about...	0:32:22	0:32:25
-You don't know what this play is about. -I do know what this play is about.	0:32:25	0:32:28
-No, you don't. That's what previews are for. -Oh, man. -That's why they call them previews.	0:32:28	0:32:31
That's where you figure out what the play is. I mean...	0:32:31	0:32:35
OK, look, look. Listen to me.	0:32:36	0:32:38
Do you see the woman at the far end of the bar?	0:32:38	0:32:41
The one who looks like she licked a homeless man's ass?	0:32:41	0:32:43
Yeah.	0:32:43	0:32:45
The only thing that matters is what she writes about us in 500 words in the Times.	0:32:45	0:32:49
-That's, uh... -Tabitha Dickinson, yes.	0:32:49	0:32:51
And, believe it or not, the only opinion that matters in New York theatre is hers.	0:32:51	0:32:55
If she likes us, we run. If she doesn't, we're fucked.	0:32:55	0:32:58
She does look like she licked a homeless guy's ass.	0:33:00	0:33:02
Do me a favour.	0:33:02	0:33:03
Don't get your panties in a twist over a fucking preview, like some rookie,	0:33:03	0:33:06
and don't tell me how to do my job.	0:33:06	0:33:08
This is my town and, to be honest, most people don't give a shit about you here.	0:33:08	0:33:12
-You're Riggan Thomson, right? -Sorry to interrupt you.	0:33:12	0:33:15
-Would you mind having a picture with us here? -No, no. Not at all.	0:33:15	0:33:18
Would you mind?	0:33:18	0:33:20
-What? -The button's on the bottom.	0:33:20	0:33:21
-Who is this guy? -He used to be Birdman.	0:33:25	0:33:27
Oh, great!	0:33:30	0:33:32
Oh, you're such a doll. Thank you. You're so sweet.	0:33:32	0:33:34
-Handsome. -Thanks. Oh.	0:33:34	0:33:36
OK, sweetheart, come on.	0:33:36	0:33:38
Are we good here?	0:33:43	0:33:46
I'm going to go home.	0:33:46	0:33:47
All right. See you tomorrow.	0:33:48	0:33:50
Oh...	0:33:52	0:33:54
..I want to know something.	0:33:54	0:33:55
Why Raymond Carver?	0:33:56	0:33:58
I was a kid in high school...	0:34:02	0:34:05
..doing a play in Syracuse, and he was in the audience.	0:34:05	0:34:09
And he, uh, sent this back afterwards.	0:34:09	0:34:12
A little note.	0:34:14	0:34:15
"Thank you for an honest performance. Ray Carver."	0:34:15	0:34:18
Yeah.	0:34:18	0:34:20
Yeah?	0:34:20	0:34:21
That's when I knew...I was going to be an actor.	0:34:21	0:34:24
Right there.	0:34:24	0:34:25
Oh.	0:34:28	0:34:30
What's so funny?	0:34:30	0:34:31
Nothing. It's just, it's on a cocktail napkin.	0:34:31	0:34:33
Yeah? So?	0:34:33	0:34:35
He was fucking drunk, man.	0:34:35	0:34:37
You headed to Hollywood, Mike?	0:34:40	0:34:42
No.	0:34:42	0:34:43
No. Hollywood's heading here, Tabby.	0:34:45	0:34:47
Good luck with that.	0:34:47	0:34:50
"A man becomes a critic	0:34:50	0:34:52
"when he cannot be an artist,	0:34:52	0:34:53
"the same way that a man becomes an informer when he cannot be a soldier."	0:34:53	0:34:58
That's Flaubert, right?	0:34:58	0:34:59
He's a Hollywood clown in a Lycra birdsuit.	0:34:59	0:35:02
Yes, he is.	0:35:02	0:35:04
But tomorrow night at eight o'clock,	0:35:04	0:35:06
he's going out on that stage and risking everything.	0:35:06	0:35:09
What'll you be doing?	0:35:09	0:35:10
Don't you ever worry that I'll give you a bad review?	0:35:12	0:35:15
I'm sure you will...	0:35:15	0:35:17
..if I ever give you a bad performance.	0:35:17	0:35:19
Miss Dickinson.	0:35:20	0:35:22
Mr Shiner.	0:35:22	0:35:24
-Hey. -Hey.	0:36:30	0:36:33
What are you still doing here?	0:36:33	0:36:34
Nothing.	0:36:34	0:36:36
Nothing. Um, your costumes are hanging in your dressing room.	0:36:36	0:36:40
Oh, great. Great.	0:36:40	0:36:42
Oh, I got that coconut water that you wanted. Um...	0:36:42	0:36:44
-If you want the face stuff, it's not open till tomorrow. -Hey! -What?	0:36:44	0:36:48
Uh...	0:36:48	0:36:49
I'm not sure that I said thank you.	0:36:49	0:36:52
For what?	0:36:52	0:36:53
For everything. I mean, you've been doing a really good job and, you know, honestly.	0:36:53	0:36:57
I've been so preoccupied with all the...	0:36:57	0:37:01
OK, well, I...just wanted to say that.	0:37:02	0:37:06
-What is that? -What?	0:37:10	0:37:11
That smell.	0:37:12	0:37:14
What is it? Look at me. Look at me!	0:37:14	0:37:16
What? What?	0:37:16	0:37:18
-Goddamn it! You've got to be shitting me! -Dad! -Where is it?	0:37:18	0:37:21
Can we not do this, please?	0:37:22	0:37:24
Dad?	0:37:24	0:37:25
Where is it? I can't believe this.	0:37:25	0:37:28
Wh-what is this?	0:37:31	0:37:32
Chunky peanut butter.	0:37:32	0:37:34
-This? This? What is that? -Ah.	0:37:34	0:37:36
That's pot. Relax.	0:37:38	0:37:40
-Relax? You can't do this to me! -To you?	0:37:40	0:37:43
Oh, shut up. You know what I'm talking about.	0:37:43	0:37:44
Oh, yeah, you're talking about you! What else is new?	0:37:44	0:37:47
-Don't do that thing where you... -That thing where I make it about me?	0:37:47	0:37:49
-Look! I'm trying to do something important! -This is not important!	0:37:49	0:37:52
It's important to me!	0:37:52	0:37:53
OK? Maybe not to you or your cynical friends,	0:37:53	0:37:55
whose only ambition is to "go viral",	0:37:55	0:37:58
but to me...this is... My God, this is my career!	0:37:58	0:38:03
It's my chance to finally do some work that means something.	0:38:03	0:38:05
That means something to who?	0:38:05	0:38:07
You had a career, Dad, before the third comic book movie.	0:38:07	0:38:11
Before people started to forget who was inside that bird costume.	0:38:11	0:38:14
You are doing a play based on a book that was written 60 years ago	0:38:14	0:38:17
for 1,000 rich old white people	0:38:17	0:38:20
whose only real concern is going to be where they go to have their cake and coffee when it's over!	0:38:20	0:38:24
Nobody gives a shit but you!	0:38:24	0:38:26
And let's face it, Dad,	0:38:26	0:38:28
you are not doing this for the sake of art,	0:38:28	0:38:30
you are doing this because you want to feel relevant again.	0:38:30	0:38:33
Well, guess what? There is an entire world out there where people	0:38:33	0:38:35
fight to be relevant every single day!	0:38:35	0:38:37
And you act like it doesn't exist.	0:38:37	0:38:39
Things are happening in a place that you ignore,	0:38:39	0:38:42
a place that, by the way, has already forgotten about you!	0:38:42	0:38:45
I mean, who the fuck are you?!	0:38:45	0:38:47
You hate bloggers, you mock Twitter.	0:38:47	0:38:50
You don't even have a Facebook page!	0:38:50	0:38:52
You're the one who doesn't exist!	0:38:52	0:38:54
You're doing this because you're scared to death,	0:38:54	0:38:56
like the rest of us, that you don't matter.	0:38:56	0:38:58
And you know what? You're right! You don't!	0:38:58	0:39:01
It's not important, OK? You're not important. Get used to it!	0:39:01	0:39:05
Dad.	0:39:23	0:39:24
HE SPARKS LIGHTER	0:39:54	0:39:55
Oh!	0:40:13	0:40:14
In the days before Nick's depression started to eat away at him,	0:40:27	0:40:30
he never knew I was pregnant,	0:40:30	0:40:31
and I never intended on telling him.	0:40:31	0:40:35
I guess we make choices in life,	0:40:35	0:40:37
and we choose to live with them.	0:40:37	0:40:39
Or not.	0:40:39	0:40:42
I didn't want that baby.	0:40:42	0:40:44
Not because I didn't love Nick,	0:40:44	0:40:46
and not because I didn't love the idea of it,	0:40:46	0:40:49
but just because I wasn't ready to love myself.	0:40:49	0:40:52
There's a distance to it all now.	0:40:53	0:40:55
A wistful distance, underscored by a gentle breeze...	0:40:55	0:40:59
Actors in position.	0:40:59	0:41:00
..and the sound of the birds...	0:41:00	0:41:01
Music out.	0:41:01	0:41:03
..laughing at the whimsy of it all.	0:41:03	0:41:05
-Lesley? -What?	0:41:05	0:41:07
I think I'm hard.	0:41:07	0:41:08
No, you're not, it's just that sometimes you don't consider other people's feelings.	0:41:08	0:41:12
No, no, no. I'm getting hard. Feel that.	0:41:12	0:41:14
-SHE SHRIEKS -What?! You've got to be kidding.	0:41:14	0:41:17
-Let's really do it. Let's really fuck. -No! Are you crazy?!	0:41:17	0:41:19
I know! It'll be incredible! It'll be so real.	0:41:19	0:41:21
Cut it out, Mike! I'm serious, Mike.	0:41:21	0:41:24
Don't call me Mike. Call me Mel. Mel!	0:41:24	0:41:26
Get off!	0:41:26	0:41:27
BANGING ON DOOR Terri! Terri!	0:41:27	0:41:30
-Terri, I know you're in there! -Get off me! Get off me!	0:41:31	0:41:34
LOUD BANG	0:41:34	0:41:36
-Ed? -Why?	0:41:37	0:41:38
-What are you doing here? -I just need you to tell me why.	0:41:38	0:41:40
Take it easy, Ed. Take it easy. I know this is hard.	0:41:40	0:41:42
AUDIENCE LAUGHS Shut up! Shut...	0:41:42	0:41:45
-Shut up! -OK. Just don't do anything stupid...	0:41:45	0:41:47
Hey!	0:41:47	0:41:48
Eddie, please!	0:41:48	0:41:50
What's the matter with me? Why do I always end up having to beg people to love me?	0:41:50	0:41:55
Eddie, please, give me the gun.	0:41:55	0:41:57
Look at me.	0:41:57	0:41:59
I was drowning. I'm just not capable of...	0:41:59	0:42:02
You...you deserve to be loved, Eddie. You do.	0:42:03	0:42:07
I just wanted to be what you wanted.	0:42:07	0:42:09
Now I spend every fucking minute praying	0:42:09	0:42:11
to be somebody else, somebody I'm not!	0:42:11	0:42:14
Anybody!	0:42:14	0:42:15
OK. J-just put the gun down, Ed. She just doesn't love you any more.	0:42:15	0:42:19
You don't, do you?	0:42:19	0:42:21
No.	0:42:21	0:42:22
And you never will.	0:42:24	0:42:25
I'm sorry.	0:42:25	0:42:27
I don't exist.	0:42:30	0:42:31
I'm not even here.	0:42:33	0:42:35
None of this even matters. I don't exist. I don't exist.	0:42:36	0:42:40
-Ed... -I don't exist.	0:42:41	0:42:44
Ed! Hey, hey, hey, hey, no, don't do that!	0:42:44	0:42:46
GUNSHOT	0:42:46	0:42:47
SCREAMING	0:42:47	0:42:48
APPLAUSE	0:42:50	0:42:53
-You're such an asshole! -Are you kidding me? That's the best I've seen you ever.	0:42:55	0:42:58
Why would you do that?! We were on stage!	0:42:58	0:43:01
What the fuck?! It's like my head's a jar of Bolognese!	0:43:01	0:43:04
Hand me the blood rig. I'll fix it.	0:43:04	0:43:05
-They're fucking in a motel room. -You've got to be shitting me! You can't get it up in six months,	0:43:05	0:43:09
and now you want to fuck me in front of 800 strangers?!	0:43:09	0:43:11
Look. I need it to feel real, OK? I need that intensity. You've known that about me...	0:43:11	0:43:15
-Oh, fuck you! -..from the beginning.	0:43:15	0:43:16
I was in the moment. I thought that you were, too.	0:43:18	0:43:21
I'm sorry.	0:43:21	0:43:22
-APPLAUSE -I told you to stop, you fucking animal!	0:43:22	0:43:26
And you were brilliant. Brilliant.	0:43:26	0:43:28
What is wrong with you?!	0:43:28	0:43:30
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE	0:43:30	0:43:38
I want your shit out of the apartment.	0:43:48	0:43:50
What? Hey, no, no, no, wait. OK. Look, look, look, look, look. I'm sorry. Can we just...	0:43:50	0:43:54
No, we can't, Mike! You know, maybe up here, you're Mr Truth,	0:43:54	0:43:58
but, in the real world, where it counts, you're a fucking fraud!	0:43:58	0:44:01
How's that feel for truth, you dick?!	0:44:01	0:44:03
-What's going on? -He's such an asshole.	0:44:04	0:44:06
-What'd he do now? -Oh, nothing, he just tried to fuck me in front of an entire audience!	0:44:06	0:44:09
-Oh, my God! -Right?	0:44:09	0:44:11
That's kind of hot!	0:44:11	0:44:12
SHE SHRIEKS	0:44:17	0:44:18
Why don't I have any self-respect?!	0:44:18	0:44:21
You're an actress, honey.	0:44:21	0:44:22
I'm pathetic!	0:44:22	0:44:24
Look at me.	0:44:26	0:44:28
You know, I...I've always dreamed of being a Broadway actress...	0:44:32	0:44:36
..since I was a little kid. And now I'm here, and I'm...	0:44:36	0:44:40
..I'm not a Broadway actress -	0:44:40	0:44:42
I'm still just a little kid.	0:44:42	0:44:44
And I keep waiting for someone to tell me I've made it.	0:44:47	0:44:50
Hey.	0:44:50	0:44:52
You made it.	0:44:52	0:44:54
I did?	0:44:56	0:44:58
Sadly, it was with Mike Shiner on a fake motel bed in front of, like, 800 people, but...	0:44:58	0:45:02
-Oh, shut up! -Oh.	0:45:02	0:45:03
KNOCK ON DOOR	0:45:05	0:45:07
-Oh, God. -Hey, is she OK?	0:45:07	0:45:09
Yeah, she's going to be fine.	0:45:09	0:45:11
Look, none of this is your fault, OK?	0:45:13	0:45:17
OK, look. You're beautiful and you're talented,	0:45:17	0:45:21
and I'm lucky to have you.	0:45:21	0:45:24
OK?	0:45:24	0:45:25
-OK. -OK. OK.	0:45:25	0:45:28
That was kind of sweet.	0:45:37	0:45:39
Yeah.	0:45:39	0:45:41
What's wrong?	0:45:43	0:45:45
Nothing. Two years, and he's never said anything like that to me.	0:45:45	0:45:49
Hey.	0:45:51	0:45:52
You're beautiful and you're talented,	0:45:53	0:45:56
and I'm lucky to have you. OK?	0:45:56	0:46:00
We're gross.	0:46:00	0:46:01
We are.	0:46:01	0:46:03
-What are you doing? -Nothing.	0:46:13	0:46:15
Do it again.	0:46:24	0:46:25
Can we talk about this like two mature artists?	0:46:32	0:46:35
I mean, what, really, is the big deal about...	0:46:35	0:46:37
Fuck you!	0:46:37	0:46:38
You're not ready yet. That's fine.	0:46:41	0:46:43
Hm.	0:46:46	0:46:47
Fuck! Actresses.	0:46:50	0:46:52
They drive me fucking crazy!	0:46:52	0:46:54
Riggan?	0:46:55	0:46:57
Riggan.	0:46:57	0:46:58
Your gun is ridiculous. I can see the red plug in the barrel,	0:46:58	0:47:02
so you look like a kid with a plastic toy when you point it at me.	0:47:02	0:47:06
I don't feel threatened at all.	0:47:06	0:47:09
Get a better one. Have some self-respect.	0:47:10	0:47:12
Please.	0:47:12	0:47:13
Hey, apart from that, uh...	0:47:15	0:47:18
..I thought that was a pretty fun crowd, huh?	0:47:18	0:47:20
I don't think it's high enough.	0:47:40	0:47:42
Me neither.	0:47:44	0:47:46
What are you doing up here?	0:47:47	0:47:50
Uh, adrenaline?	0:47:50	0:47:52
I just got out of rehab. It's the closest thing I get to a drug.	0:47:52	0:47:57
-You went to rehab? -Yeah.	0:47:57	0:48:00
Cool.	0:48:00	0:48:02
It wasn't all Dr Drew or anything,	0:48:02	0:48:03
-but that dude from American Pie was there. -Yeah?	0:48:03	0:48:07
Jump!	0:48:07	0:48:08
Eat me!	0:48:08	0:48:10
OK, then jump on my face!	0:48:10	0:48:12
-SHE CHUCKLES -I love this city.	0:48:12	0:48:15
Yeah?	0:48:15	0:48:16
Why do you act like a dick all the time?	0:48:19	0:48:22
Do you just do it to antagonise people?	0:48:22	0:48:24
Maybe.	0:48:25	0:48:27
You really don't give a shit if people like you or not?	0:48:27	0:48:29
Not really.	0:48:30	0:48:33
That's cool.	0:48:33	0:48:34
Is it? I...I don't know.	0:48:34	0:48:37
Hey.	0:48:38	0:48:40
-Hey! -What?	0:48:40	0:48:42
Let's play a game.	0:48:42	0:48:43
-A game? -Mmm-hmm.	0:48:43	0:48:45
-What are you, eight? -What are you, 78?	0:48:45	0:48:48
-Truth or dare? -Oh, come on. Let's...let's...	0:48:48	0:48:50
-Truth or dare? -Oh.	0:48:50	0:48:51
Truth.	0:48:52	0:48:54
When we first met, you made a comment about my ass.	0:48:56	0:49:01
Why did you do that?	0:49:01	0:49:02
You have a terrific ass, and I noticed that.	0:49:04	0:49:08
And I just commented on it.	0:49:08	0:49:10
-Truth or dare? -Dare.	0:49:12	0:49:14
-Really? -Yeah.	0:49:14	0:49:16
OK.	0:49:16	0:49:17
OK. There's a bald guy. He's going to walk right under you.	0:49:20	0:49:23
I want you to...spit on his head.	0:49:23	0:49:24
-No! -You said dare.	0:49:24	0:49:26
-Truth. -No, it's too late.	0:49:26	0:49:29
-You happy? -Yeah.	0:49:36	0:49:37
Ew!	0:49:37	0:49:39
Truth or dare?	0:49:41	0:49:43
-Truth. -You're boring.	0:49:43	0:49:45
The truth is always interesting.	0:49:45	0:49:47
Uh...	0:49:49	0:49:50
Do you want to fool around with me?	0:49:51	0:49:53
No.	0:49:54	0:49:56
Really?	0:49:56	0:49:58
Why not?	0:49:58	0:49:59
-That's a second question. -It's a second part.	0:49:59	0:50:02
I'd be afraid I couldn't get it up.	0:50:05	0:50:07
That didn't seem to be a problem for you on stage.	0:50:11	0:50:14
That's because nothing is a problem for me on stage.	0:50:16	0:50:19
-I want to ask another question. -You already asked another question.	0:50:21	0:50:24
-One more. -Go ahead.	0:50:24	0:50:26
If you weren't afraid, what would you want to do to me?	0:50:28	0:50:31
I'd pull your eyes out of your head...	0:50:37	0:50:40
That's sweet.	0:50:40	0:50:41
I'd put them in my own skull...	0:50:41	0:50:44
..and look around so I could see the street	0:50:44	0:50:46
the way I used to when I was your age.	0:50:46	0:50:48
Goodnight.	0:51:01	0:51:02
DOOR OPENS	0:51:45	0:51:46
DOOR CLOSES	0:51:49	0:51:50
Don't kill the messenger.	0:51:53	0:51:55
He's an asshole.	0:51:56	0:51:57
-BIRDMAN: -I told you.	0:51:59	0:52:00
You fucking prick!	0:52:00	0:52:02
He's playing you, Riggan.	0:52:02	0:52:03
This is it?	0:52:03	0:52:05
Page 12. Page 12.	0:52:06	0:52:08
"Riggan Thomson, better known as the face of the Birdman films,	0:52:10	0:52:13
"tries not to lay an egg on Broadway."	0:52:13	0:52:15
-Where's the rest of it? -There is no rest of it.	0:52:15	0:52:18
-Don't worry, somebody'll be using that to scoop up dog shit tomorrow. -How can you be so calm about this?	0:52:18	0:52:23
What are my other choices?	0:52:23	0:52:24
-Aren't you scared at all, Laura? -About what?	0:52:24	0:52:27
About being humiliated out there!	0:52:27	0:52:28
It won't be the first time I've been humiliated.	0:52:28	0:52:31
Well, of course it won't.	0:52:31	0:52:32
You're an asshole.	0:52:36	0:52:37
And, by the way, I'm not pregnant,	0:52:44	0:52:46
so there's one thing you don't have to worry about.	0:52:46	0:52:48
-BIRDMAN: -Forget about her.	0:52:51	0:52:54
He stole your front page.	0:52:54	0:52:56
He's stealing your show. He thinks you're a joke.	0:52:56	0:52:59
Now 2 million people agree with him.	0:53:00	0:53:03
Maybe you are, Riggan. Maybe that's what you are - a joke.	0:53:03	0:53:07
Whoa! What the hell is going on?	0:53:26	0:53:29
-Get up! -Hey! Ow! That hurts!	0:53:29	0:53:30
-Get up! -Back away!	0:53:30	0:53:32
-So, Carver's the reason you became an actor, huh? -What?	0:53:32	0:53:34
Listen to me. This is my fucking show.	0:53:34	0:53:36
I did the work. I raised the money. I arrange the fucking press!	0:53:36	0:53:39
Oh, Jesus! THEY called ME for an interview.	0:53:39	0:53:43
-I told them the first thing that came into my head. -Really?	0:53:43	0:53:46
The cover of the Arts section, for Christ's sake!	0:53:46	0:53:48
You told them the first thing that came into your... Fuck the Arts section!	0:53:48	0:53:51
You told them the first thing that came into your head? Right. Because that's you, Mike, right?	0:53:51	0:53:55
You're Mr Natural. Mr Fuck-the-scene.	0:53:55	0:53:57
-Just-stare-at-my-massive-hard-on. Right? That's the truth of the moment. -You think it looked massive?	0:53:57	0:54:01
Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up! You don't get hard on my stage unless I tell you to!	0:54:01	0:54:04
-Your stage? -Yeah. -Oh, let me tell you something.	0:54:04	0:54:06
This stage has belonged to a lot of great actors, but you are not one of them, pal.	0:54:06	0:54:10
Really? So you wrote your own lines, huh?	0:54:10	0:54:12
Ow! I did, actually.	0:54:12	0:54:13
You wrote a few changes and you mumbled a little bit, you self-absorbed prick!	0:54:13	0:54:16
-Hey! I'm self-absorbed? Look at you. -You nobody, spiteful piece of shit! -Nobody?	0:54:16	0:54:19
-Yeah. -My massive hard-on got 50,000 views on YouTube.	0:54:19	0:54:22
A cat playing with a dildo gets more than that! Get the fuck out of here!	0:54:22	0:54:25
-I don't care. -Yes, you do! You care.	0:54:25	0:54:27
-I'm a theatre actor. -I don't give a shit. You care.	0:54:27	0:54:29
Everybody says, "Oh, Mike is so honest.	0:54:29	0:54:31
-"Mike is so motherfucking truthful!" -Ow! Hey, hey!	0:54:31	0:54:34
-Shit! -You said in the interview your father was a drunk like Carver. Is that true, Mike? Is that true?	0:54:34	0:54:38
-No. No. -Cos my father was.	0:54:38	0:54:40
-My father was a mean fucking drunk. You understand? -OK.	0:54:40	0:54:44
He beat the shit out of us.	0:54:44	0:54:46
That was OK, though, because at least when he was beating us,	0:54:46	0:54:48
he wasn't thinking about taking us out to his tool shed.	0:54:48	0:54:52
Because when we got to the tool shed...	0:54:52	0:54:54
..that son of a bitch would smile and say,	0:54:54	0:54:56
"You want to get down on your knees and unbuckle my belt,	0:54:56	0:54:58
"or do you want me to take it off and use it on you?"	0:54:58	0:55:01
After a while, I made myself numb, so, you know. But my...	0:55:01	0:55:04
..my little sister...	0:55:04	0:55:05
OK. OK. OK. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey.	0:55:07	0:55:11
Oh, God.	0:55:11	0:55:12
Uh, I didn't know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.	0:55:13	0:55:16
-That's...that's fucking horrible, man. I'm sorry. -Yeah.	0:55:16	0:55:20
-It's also not true. See, I can pretend, too. -Oh!	0:55:21	0:55:24
Don't fuck with me, Mike. I'm telling you.	0:55:24	0:55:26
-You're a little bit crazy. You should start using that on stage. -Yeah, you have no fucking idea.	0:55:26	0:55:30
-"Working with Riggan Thomson's like waltzing with a monkey." Huh? -I might have said that.	0:55:30	0:55:34
Yeah, you might? Come on, let's go.	0:55:34	0:55:36
-Come on. -Yeah? -Yeah.	0:55:36	0:55:38
Why don't you get your wings and your fucking birdsuit, man?	0:55:38	0:55:41
Ow!	0:55:41	0:55:42
THEY GROAN	0:55:46	0:55:48
I'm going to crab up on your ass and choke you out. I'm going to fucking choke you out!	0:55:51	0:55:54
-Get off of me! -What are you looking at?	0:55:54	0:55:56
What are you going to do, you going to replace me?!	0:55:56	0:55:58
You going to get fucking Ryan Gosling or some shit?!	0:55:58	0:56:01
What do you think my friend Tabitha's going to do to you in the Times, you fucking dilettante?	0:56:01	0:56:05
-BIRDMAN: -You are lame, Riggan,	0:56:23	0:56:26
rolling around with that poncy theatre fuck	0:56:26	0:56:30
in an 800-seat shithole like this.	0:56:30	0:56:33
Oh, you really fucked up this time.	0:56:39	0:56:42
You destroy a genius book with that infantile adaptation.	0:56:42	0:56:46
Now you're about to destroy what's left of your career.	0:56:46	0:56:50
It's pathetic.	0:56:51	0:56:53
Breathing in, I am calm.	0:56:53	0:56:54
Let's get the hell out of here while we can.	0:56:54	0:56:57
I ignore this mental formation.	0:56:57	0:56:59
This is a mental formation.	0:56:59	0:57:01
Stop that shit!	0:57:01	0:57:03
I'm not a mental formation. I'm you, asshole!	0:57:03	0:57:06
Leave me alone.	0:57:07	0:57:08
You were a movie star, remember?	0:57:08	0:57:10
-Pretentious, but happy. -I wasn't happy.	0:57:10	0:57:13
Ignorant, but charming. Now you're just a tiny, bitter cocksucker.	0:57:13	0:57:17
I was fucking miserable. I was fucking miserable.	0:57:17	0:57:20
Yeah, but fake miserable. Hollywood miserable.	0:57:20	0:57:24
What are you trying to prove?	0:57:24	0:57:25
That you're an artist? Well, you're not.	0:57:25	0:57:27
Fuck you!	0:57:27	0:57:29
No, fuck you, you coward.	0:57:29	0:57:31
We grossed billions! What, are you ashamed of that? Billions!	0:57:31	0:57:35
And billions of flies eat shit every day!	0:57:35	0:57:37
So what? Does that make it good?	0:57:37	0:57:39
I don't know if you noticed, but that was 1992!	0:57:41	0:57:44
You could jump right back into that suit, if you wanted to. We're not dead.	0:57:44	0:57:47
Oh, look at me! Look at this! Look, look, look!	0:57:47	0:57:51
I look like a turkey with leukaemia!	0:57:51	0:57:54
I'm fucking disappearing.	0:57:54	0:57:56
This is what's left!	0:57:57	0:57:58
I'm the answer to a fucking Trivial Pursuit question!	0:57:58	0:58:01
You're an impostor here.	0:58:01	0:58:02
Eventually, they're going to figure you out.	0:58:02	0:58:05
What part of this don't you get? You're dead.	0:58:05	0:58:07
We are not dead.	0:58:07	0:58:09
Oh, please, just stay dead.	0:58:09	0:58:11
We are not dead.	0:58:11	0:58:12
Stop saying "we"! There is no "we"!	0:58:12	0:58:15
I'm not fucking you! I'm Riggan fucking Thomson!	0:58:15	0:58:19
No, you're Birdman.	0:58:19	0:58:22
Because, without me, all that's left is you...	0:58:22	0:58:26
..a sad, selfish, mediocre actor...	0:58:26	0:58:29
..grasping at the last vestiges of his career.	0:58:29	0:58:33
GLASS SMASHES	0:58:35	0:58:37
What the hell did you do that for? I liked that poster.	0:58:39	0:58:42
HE CHUCKLES	0:58:42	0:58:43
It's always "we", brother.	0:58:43	0:58:45
Fuck you! Shut the fuck up!	0:58:45	0:58:48
Leave me alone!	0:58:48	0:58:49
You're fucking, so fucking annoying! Shut up!	0:58:58	0:59:01
Hey. What's up?	0:59:08	0:59:10
Um, well...	0:59:10	0:59:12
-..one hour till curtain. -Yeah, cool. -Why don't you rest a little bit?	0:59:12	0:59:15
Yeah, I'm going to lay down.	0:59:15	0:59:17
-Almost there, buddy. Last preview. -OK. Cool.	0:59:17	0:59:20
-How you doing? -Good. Great.	0:59:20	0:59:22
Good. The money came through. I just need to transfer it into the account.	0:59:22	0:59:25
There you go, thank you. Good, that's terrific.	0:59:25	0:59:27
So...yeah, I'll go, uh, do that.	0:59:27	0:59:29
Thanks for stopping by.	0:59:29	0:59:31
-Yeah. -OK.	0:59:31	0:59:32
You know I'm proud of you, don't you?	0:59:35	0:59:37
This took balls.	0:59:38	0:59:40
-And you did it, OK? -I know.	0:59:40	0:59:43
Hey, I think we ought to cancel the preview.	0:59:43	0:59:46
-What? -I'm tired, dude. I can't do this any more, Jake.	0:59:46	0:59:50
I can't.	0:59:51	0:59:52
-HE LAUGHS -That's a joke, right?	0:59:54	0:59:56
You know, I don't think this is for me. The whole...	0:59:57	1:00:01
They're laughing at me.	1:00:02	1:00:03
There is a three-block line of people waiting for you!	1:00:03	1:00:08
It's a...it's a full house. W-w-we're sold out!	1:00:10	1:00:13
-Really? -Yes!	1:00:13	1:00:15
And the French Ambassador's coming.	1:00:15	1:00:17
And the Prince of Saudi Arabia's bringing one of his wives.	1:00:17	1:00:20
And I didn't want to tell you this, but Martin Scorsese...	1:00:20	1:00:25
..is casting his new film and, you know... Don't tell anybody.	1:00:25	1:00:28
-No, no, no, I won't. -OK?	1:00:28	1:00:31
OK?	1:00:31	1:00:32
OK. Yeah, yeah, I'm ready. I can be ready.	1:00:32	1:00:35
-Good. -Thank you.	1:00:35	1:00:37
How is he?	1:00:41	1:00:43
He'll be fine.	1:00:43	1:00:44
Poor creature.	1:00:44	1:00:46
Is it true? Scorsese?	1:00:46	1:00:48
Yeah. And the new Pope, too.	1:00:48	1:00:50
You're an asshole, Jake!	1:00:52	1:00:54
I'm the one keeping this afloat!	1:00:54	1:00:57
Hey.	1:01:10	1:01:12
Are you OK?	1:01:15	1:01:16
Yeah. Yeah.	1:01:16	1:01:18
No, I-I...think I cut my hand shaving.	1:01:18	1:01:21
Well, I-I-I just wanted to say... I'm sorry.	1:01:21	1:01:24
What for?	1:01:24	1:01:25
Well..	1:01:25	1:01:26
..I knew what Mike was capable of, and I brought him in, anyway.	1:01:26	1:01:30
No, no, no, no, no. You did good. You did good.	1:01:30	1:01:32
Are you kidding? You did great.	1:01:32	1:01:34
Tomorrow's my first opening night on Broadway.	1:01:36	1:01:40
Mine too.	1:01:40	1:01:42
And I just want to let you know that, no matter what happens, that...	1:01:42	1:01:45
..I'm really grateful to you.	1:01:47	1:01:48
Oh, no, no. Me too.	1:01:48	1:01:50
Hey, this is exciting.	1:01:51	1:01:53
We have a full house. Jake just told me.	1:01:54	1:01:57
Yeah, it's great.	1:01:58	1:02:00
Oh, God!	1:02:07	1:02:09
For fuck's sake, just jump already.	1:02:34	1:02:36
How'd you know I'd be up here?	1:02:37	1:02:40
Well, I didn't know, but I... kind of hoped, maybe.	1:02:40	1:02:44
Where's Lesley?	1:02:45	1:02:46
Lesley? Uh, Lesley's moving on.	1:02:47	1:02:50
Smart girl.	1:02:52	1:02:53
Oh, thank you. I appreciate that support.	1:02:53	1:02:56
You ready for your last preview?	1:02:58	1:03:01
Sure, yeah.	1:03:01	1:03:02
Who did that to you?	1:03:02	1:03:04
Could have been anybody, I guess.	1:03:06	1:03:08
Yes.	1:03:08	1:03:10
I'm sort of hoping it was Lesley.	1:03:10	1:03:13
Well, it wasn't Lesley.	1:03:13	1:03:15
Oh, my God.	1:03:18	1:03:19
-Are you fucking kidding me? -No.	1:03:19	1:03:22
-Jesus Christ! -No, no. I-I...	1:03:23	1:03:26
..I think maybe I deserved it.	1:03:26	1:03:28
Fuck.	1:03:30	1:03:32
Hey.	1:03:32	1:03:33
Fuck.	1:03:33	1:03:34
Tell me something. What is...	1:03:35	1:03:38
What is the worst thing that he did to you?	1:03:38	1:03:41
Seriously.	1:03:41	1:03:42
He was never around.	1:03:42	1:03:44
Yeah? I mean, so what? That was it?	1:03:44	1:03:48
No. It was...how he tried to make up for it	1:03:48	1:03:52
by constantly trying to convince me that I was special.	1:03:52	1:03:56
OK. Look.	1:04:04	1:04:06
Look at me.	1:04:06	1:04:08
He was right, though.	1:04:09	1:04:11
About what?	1:04:11	1:04:12
About your being special.	1:04:12	1:04:14
You know, you...you've been hanging around here,	1:04:15	1:04:18
trying to make yourself invisible	1:04:18	1:04:20
behind this fragile little fuck-up routine of yours,	1:04:20	1:04:22
but you can't.	1:04:22	1:04:24
You're anything but invisible. You're big.	1:04:24	1:04:27
You're kind of a great mess.	1:04:28	1:04:30
It's like a candle burning on both ends, but it's beautiful.	1:04:30	1:04:33
No amount of booze or weed or attitude is going to hide that.	1:04:34	1:04:38
I'm glad you're an actor and not a writer cos that was, like...	1:04:43	1:04:48
..Oprah...	1:04:49	1:04:50
..Hallmark...	1:04:52	1:04:54
..R Kelly bad.	1:04:54	1:04:55
Yeah, well, I wasn't...	1:04:55	1:04:57
Mm.	1:04:58	1:04:59
HE CLEARS THROAT	1:05:04	1:05:05
Truth or dare?	1:05:19	1:05:21
-Truth. -No.	1:05:21	1:05:22
-Truth. -No.	1:05:27	1:05:29
Truth or dare?	1:05:32	1:05:34
Do you have any idea where you're going?	1:05:54	1:05:56
Absolutely not.	1:05:56	1:05:58
How do you do it?	1:06:07	1:06:09
Do what?	1:06:10	1:06:11
How do you go out there, every single night,	1:06:11	1:06:13
and pretend to be somebody else in front of all those people?	1:06:13	1:06:16
I don't pretend out there. I told you.	1:06:16	1:06:19
I pretend just about every place else, but not out there.	1:06:19	1:06:23
That's a shame.	1:06:23	1:06:25
What are we doing here?	1:06:26	1:06:29
What do you mean?	1:06:29	1:06:30
I mean, what are we doing here?	1:06:31	1:06:33
Fucking teenagers!	1:06:39	1:06:41
By the time we got to the hospital, the kid was dead.	1:06:42	1:06:46
So we took the old couple up to the OR.	1:06:46	1:06:51
And we...worked like hell on them...	1:06:51	1:06:54
..through most of the night.	1:06:54	1:06:56
The husband, the old man, was depressed for the longest time.	1:06:57	1:07:02
Even after I told him the wife was going to pull through, he was still depressed.	1:07:02	1:07:06
So, I went up to the mouth hole and I asked him.	1:07:06	1:07:10
And he told me it was because he couldn't see her,	1:07:12	1:07:16
the wife, through the eyeholes.	1:07:16	1:07:19
Can you imagine?	1:07:19	1:07:20
I'm telling you, this guy's heart was breaking	1:07:20	1:07:23
because he couldn't turn his goddamn head just to see his goddamn wife.	1:07:23	1:07:28
So...	1:07:28	1:07:30
..I guess the question we should ask ourselves is...	1:07:30	1:07:34
..what do we talk about when we talk about love?	1:07:34	1:07:38
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE	1:07:40	1:07:47
Mel and I had been together five years,	1:07:50	1:07:52
and I don't know how many times I'd heard the words "I love you",	1:07:52	1:07:56
but it wasn't till that night...	1:07:56	1:07:57
-Blood rig should be good now. -OK.	1:07:57	1:07:58
Be ready to go in two minutes.	1:07:58	1:08:01
That was amazing!	1:08:01	1:08:03
-Yeah, good, right? -Yeah!	1:08:03	1:08:04
It's actually going well.	1:08:07	1:08:09
Yeah.	1:08:09	1:08:10
I, uh...	1:08:12	1:08:13
..think we need to talk.	1:08:13	1:08:15
No, no.	1:08:15	1:08:16
Yeah, I guess you're right,	1:08:16	1:08:18
but we will eventually because that's the only way	1:08:18	1:08:21
I'm going to get a chance to say I'm sorry.	1:08:21	1:08:23
I really am sorry.	1:08:23	1:08:24
We could've made great parents.	1:08:26	1:08:28
-Horrible. We'd have been... -Awful. We would've raised, like...	1:08:28	1:08:30
-A serial killer. -Justin Bieber.	1:08:30	1:08:33
I really wanted to be a mum.	1:08:35	1:08:38
But my body doesn't seem to agree.	1:08:38	1:08:40
When I imagined myself on Broadway,	1:08:46	1:08:48
I never saw the dancing reindeer.	1:08:48	1:08:50
Nice touch.	1:08:50	1:08:51
In the days before Nick's depression started to eat away at him,	1:08:57	1:09:00
he had no idea I was pregnant	1:09:00	1:09:03
and I never intended on telling him.	1:09:03	1:09:06
I guess you make choices in life,	1:09:06	1:09:07
and you choose to live with them.	1:09:07	1:09:10
Or not.	1:09:10	1:09:11
I didn't want that baby.	1:09:11	1:09:14
Not because I didn't love Nick, and not because	1:09:14	1:09:16
I didn't love the idea of it, but because...	1:09:16	1:09:18
..I just wasn't ready to love myself.	1:09:20	1:09:22
There's a distance to it now.	1:09:24	1:09:26
Hey, Jimmy, you got a smoke?	1:09:27	1:09:30
INAUDIBLE	1:09:57	1:10:01
Jimmy!	1:10:15	1:10:16
Hey!	1:10:18	1:10:19
Hey!	1:10:24	1:10:25
Jimmy! Jimmy!	1:10:25	1:10:27
Jimmy!	1:10:27	1:10:28
Hey!	1:10:31	1:10:32
Argh!	1:10:33	1:10:34
Shit!	1:10:34	1:10:35
Fuck!	1:10:36	1:10:37
Fuck.	1:10:43	1:10:45
Hey, aren't you Riggan Thomson?	1:10:53	1:10:55
Holy shit, let me get an autograph.	1:10:55	1:10:57
Don't be a dick. Let me get an autograph.	1:10:57	1:11:00
Dude, you fucking rock!	1:11:00	1:11:01
Birdman!	1:11:01	1:11:03
Oh, shit!	1:11:03	1:11:04
Oh, my God! Do you see that?	1:11:10	1:11:13
Oh, can we take one picture?	1:11:14	1:11:17
Just one picture! Kids, get next to him!	1:11:17	1:11:19
-Hey, Birdman! -You suck!	1:11:19	1:11:21
You suck!	1:11:21	1:11:22
Riggan, we're going to miss him.	1:11:33	1:11:35
It's the Bird-fucking-man! Hey, come look at this guy!	1:11:35	1:11:38
Birdman! Hey, Birdman, whoo! Look at that!	1:11:38	1:11:42
Where you going, man?	1:11:48	1:11:51
You look so old in person.	1:11:51	1:11:53
Fuck you!	1:11:53	1:11:54
Sir! Sir! Where are you going?	1:11:58	1:12:00
Sir! Where are you... Sir!	1:12:00	1:12:03
What are you doing?	1:12:03	1:12:05
I'm waiting for Jake. This is my attorney, Mr Roth.	1:12:05	1:12:08
We're pursuing financial remunerations for the injuries...	1:12:08	1:12:10
-I got a play to do! -Excuse me?	1:12:10	1:12:12
Excuse me, sir, you can't go in there! You can't...	1:12:12	1:12:14
Actors Equity is a very strong union, sir!	1:12:14	1:12:17
THUNDER CLAPS	1:12:20	1:12:23
Knock, knock, knock! Terri! Terri!	1:12:27	1:12:31
Ed?	1:12:31	1:12:32
What are...what are you doing here?	1:12:33	1:12:35
Why?! I just need you to tell me why!	1:12:35	1:12:38
Take it easy, Ed. I know this is hard.	1:12:38	1:12:40
Shut up! Fuck you! Shut up! AUDIENCE LAUGHS	1:12:40	1:12:42
Shut up!	1:12:42	1:12:43
Eddie, please!	1:12:43	1:12:44
What's wrong with me?	1:12:47	1:12:49
Why do I always...beg people to love me?	1:12:51	1:12:54
Eddie, please, just...please, just give me the gun.	1:12:54	1:12:58
AUDIENCE MURMUR	1:12:58	1:12:59
I just wanted to be what you wanted.	1:13:00	1:13:02
Now I spend every fucking day...	1:13:02	1:13:06
..trying to be somebody else, somebody I'm not!	1:13:06	1:13:08
Put the gun down. She just doesn't love you!	1:13:08	1:13:10
SHE SCREAMS	1:13:10	1:13:11
AUDIENCE GASP	1:13:11	1:13:12
Eddie. Look at me. I was drowning.	1:13:12	1:13:15
I-I'm just not capable of that kind of...	1:13:15	1:13:17
PHONE RINGS	1:13:17	1:13:19
You deserve to be loved, Eddie. You do.	1:13:19	1:13:22
-I just wanted to be what you wanted. -Hello?	1:13:22	1:13:24
Mr Roth? OK, don't leave, please don't...	1:13:24	1:13:27
Is that a threat? What wheelchair?	1:13:27	1:13:29
OK, Mr Roth, please, just hear me out. Will you hear me out?	1:13:29	1:13:32
Don't hang up. Don't hang up. OK, listen.	1:13:32	1:13:34
Give me ten minutes to grab my things,	1:13:34	1:13:36
give me ten minutes, and we can meet to discu... Please, don't hang up.	1:13:36	1:13:39
Goddamn it! The motherfucker hung up!	1:13:39	1:13:42
LOUD BANG IN DISTANCE	1:13:52	1:13:54
SCREAMING IN DISTANCE	1:13:54	1:13:56
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE IN DISTANCE	1:13:56	1:14:04
Dad.	1:14:29	1:14:30
Dad!	1:14:32	1:14:33
-Hey! -Are you...OK?	1:14:33	1:14:35
Why?	1:14:35	1:14:37
You...s-seem sort of...	1:14:37	1:14:39
No, I'm good, I'm good.	1:14:39	1:14:42
This is good. You want some?	1:14:42	1:14:44
No.	1:14:44	1:14:45
OK.	1:14:46	1:14:47
Do you really think you'll be ready for opening tomorrow?	1:14:47	1:14:50
Yeah. Yep.	1:14:50	1:14:51
Yeah, well, I mean...	1:14:53	1:14:56
..previews were pretty much a train wreck.	1:14:56	1:14:58
We can't seem to get through a performance without...	1:14:58	1:15:01
..a raging fire or a raging hard-on. I'm broke.	1:15:01	1:15:05
I'm not sleeping, like, you know... at all.	1:15:05	1:15:08
And, uh, this play is kind of starting to feel like a...	1:15:08	1:15:13
..miniature, deformed version of myself that just keeps...	1:15:13	1:15:17
..following me around and, like,	1:15:17	1:15:20
hitting me in the balls with a, like...a tiny little hammer.	1:15:20	1:15:24
I'm sorry, what was the question?	1:15:26	1:15:27
Never mind.	1:15:27	1:15:30
-Tonight wasn't bad. -I know.	1:15:30	1:15:32
-It was weird, but it was kind of cool. -Yeah, really, you think?	1:15:32	1:15:35
-Yeah, I think people liked it. -Yeah, well...	1:15:35	1:15:38
What are you doing, by the way? Homework?	1:15:38	1:15:40
No, I don't..	1:15:40	1:15:42
No, um... When I was in rehab, they made us do this.	1:15:42	1:15:45
Really? What is it?	1:15:45	1:15:46
It's, um... These dashes represent the 6 billion years	1:15:46	1:15:50
that the Earth has been around.	1:15:50	1:15:51
And so, each dash represents 1,000 years.	1:15:51	1:15:54
And, um, this...is how long humans have been here.	1:15:54	1:15:59
150,000 years.	1:15:59	1:16:01
I think they're trying to remind us that	1:16:02	1:16:04
that's all our ego and self-obsession are worth.	1:16:04	1:16:07
I was a shitty father, wasn't I?	1:16:11	1:16:13
No, you were...	1:16:15	1:16:16
You were fine.	1:16:18	1:16:20
Yeah.	1:16:20	1:16:21
That's right, I was... I was just fine.	1:16:21	1:16:23
Um...	1:16:25	1:16:26
I can't...	1:16:27	1:16:28
-Dad? -What?	1:16:28	1:16:30
Oh, shoot. Ow! I'm sorry.	1:16:30	1:16:32
You just wiped out the entire human race.	1:16:32	1:16:36
There it goes. I'm sorry.	1:16:36	1:16:38
Hey, um...	1:16:40	1:16:42
You're becoming a trending topic.	1:16:42	1:16:44
-Really? -Yeah.	1:16:44	1:16:46
I should probably tell you about this before anybody else does.	1:16:47	1:16:50
350,000 views in less than an hour.	1:16:54	1:16:57
Fuck!	1:16:59	1:17:00
Believe it or not, this is power.	1:17:02	1:17:05
Hey, look at that! Hey, look, it's Riggan Thomson!	1:17:08	1:17:12
Whoa! Look at that.	1:17:12	1:17:14
1 million, 300,000 hits in the last two hours.	1:17:14	1:17:16
What you're seeing is Birdman actor Riggan Thomson running through the streets...	1:17:16	1:17:19
-Hey, give me another one. -You got it.	1:17:19	1:17:22
-Oh, come on. That takes a lot of balls. -Or not. -Ouch!	1:17:22	1:17:26
What do you need to do to get a job in this town these days?	1:17:26	1:17:28
I know, like, why do actors have to resort to this? Come on...	1:17:28	1:17:31
That's going over to Ms Dickinson.	1:17:31	1:17:34
Yeah. Yeah. Give me a minute.	1:17:34	1:17:36
Hey, um, that's on me. She's a friend of mine.	1:17:40	1:17:43
OK.	1:17:43	1:17:45
Thank you.	1:17:45	1:17:47
That was...	1:17:57	1:17:59
..20 years before I put on that goddamn outfit.	1:17:59	1:18:02
I don't care.	1:18:02	1:18:04
OK. I was...just...	1:18:06	1:18:08
You...you know, before you come tomorrow night...	1:18:09	1:18:11
-It doesn't matter. -OK.	1:18:11	1:18:13
I'm going to destroy your play.	1:18:16	1:18:18
But you didn't even see it.	1:18:20	1:18:22
-Um, you know, did I do something to offend you? -As a matter of fact, you did.	1:18:22	1:18:25
You took up space in a theatre which, otherwise,	1:18:25	1:18:27
might have been used on something worthwhile.	1:18:27	1:18:30
OK. Well... I mean, you don't even know if it's any good or not. I didn't...	1:18:30	1:18:35
That's true. I haven't read a word of it, or even seen a preview,	1:18:35	1:18:39
but, after the opening tomorrow,	1:18:39	1:18:40
I'm going to turn in the worst review anybody has ever read.	1:18:40	1:18:45
And I'm going to close your play.	1:18:45	1:18:47
Would you like to know why?	1:18:47	1:18:49
Because I hate you and everyone you represent.	1:18:49	1:18:54
Entitled, selfish, spoiled children.	1:18:54	1:18:58
Blissfully untrained, unversed and unprepared...	1:18:58	1:19:02
..to even attempt real art.	1:19:02	1:19:04
Handing each other awards for cartoons and pornography.	1:19:04	1:19:08
Measuring your worth in weekends?	1:19:08	1:19:11
Well, this is the theatre.	1:19:11	1:19:13
And you don't get to come in here and pretend	1:19:13	1:19:15
you can write, direct and act	1:19:15	1:19:17
in your own propaganda piece	1:19:17	1:19:18
without coming through me first.	1:19:18	1:19:21
-Ah. -So break a leg.	1:19:21	1:19:23
Wow. You know, what has to happen in a person's life	1:19:25	1:19:28
for them to become a critic, anyway?	1:19:28	1:19:31
What are you writing, another review?	1:19:31	1:19:33
Huh? Is it any good?	1:19:33	1:19:35
Is it? Is it bad? Did you even see this? Let me read it.	1:19:35	1:19:38
-I will call the police. -No, you won't call the police. Let's read your fucking review.	1:19:38	1:19:42
"Callow." Callow is a label.	1:19:42	1:19:45
"Lacklustre." That's just a label.	1:19:45	1:19:48
Margin... "Marginalia"? Are you kidding me?	1:19:48	1:19:50
It sounds like you need penicillin to clear that up.	1:19:50	1:19:53
That's a label, too. These are just all labels. You just label everything.	1:19:53	1:19:56
That's so fucking lazy. You're just...you're a lazy fucker.	1:19:56	1:20:01
You're a lazy...	1:20:01	1:20:02
Do you know what this is? Do you even know what that is?	1:20:02	1:20:06
You don't. You know why?	1:20:06	1:20:07
Because you can't see this thing	1:20:07	1:20:10
if you don't know how to label it.	1:20:10	1:20:11
You mistake all those little noises in your head for true knowledge.	1:20:11	1:20:15
-Are you finished? -No, I'm not finished.	1:20:15	1:20:17
There's nothing in here about technique. There's nothing in here about structure,	1:20:17	1:20:20
nothing in here about intention. It's just a bunch of crappy opinions	1:20:20	1:20:23
backed up by even crappier comparisons.	1:20:23	1:20:27
You write a couple of paragraphs, and you know what?	1:20:27	1:20:30
None of this costs you fucking anything.	1:20:30	1:20:33
GLASS SMASHES	1:20:33	1:20:34
You risk nothing. Nothing, nothing, nothing!	1:20:34	1:20:36
Well, I'm a fucking actor!	1:20:36	1:20:38
This play cost me everything.	1:20:42	1:20:44
So I'll tell you what. You take this fucking...	1:20:46	1:20:49
malicious, cowardly...	1:20:49	1:20:51
..shittily-written review and you shove that right the fuck up...	1:20:51	1:20:56
..your wrinkly...tight ass.	1:20:56	1:21:00
You're no actor, you're a celebrity.	1:21:04	1:21:07
Let's be clear on that.	1:21:07	1:21:08
I'm going to kill your play.	1:21:14	1:21:16
Tomorrow...	1:21:47	1:21:50
..and tomorrow...	1:21:50	1:21:52
..and tomorrow...	1:21:53	1:21:55
-..creeps in this... -CAR HORN BEEPS	1:21:57	1:21:59
..petty pace...	1:22:02	1:22:04
..from day to day...	1:22:04	1:22:06
..to the last...syllable...	1:22:08	1:22:11
..of recorded time.	1:22:13	1:22:15
And...	1:22:17	1:22:18
..all of our yesterdays...	1:22:20	1:22:23
..have lighted...	1:22:25	1:22:26
..fools!	1:22:28	1:22:29
Give me a pint of whisky, please.	1:22:32	1:22:33
Dusty death.	1:22:33	1:22:36
Out...out...	1:22:36	1:22:39
6.50, my friend.	1:22:40	1:22:42
-Huh? -6.50.	1:22:42	1:22:43
Here, just, uh...uh... just take that.	1:22:45	1:22:48
Walking shadow...	1:22:51	1:22:53
..a poor...	1:22:55	1:22:57
..player...	1:22:57	1:22:59
..that struts and frets his hour upon the stage...	1:23:00	1:23:05
..and then is heard...	1:23:05	1:23:07
..no more!	1:23:08	1:23:10
It is a tale...	1:23:10	1:23:12
..told by an idiot...	1:23:12	1:23:16
..full of sound and fury...	1:23:16	1:23:19
..signifying nothing!	1:23:20	1:23:24
Where you going, man? Was that too much?	1:23:27	1:23:30
I was just trying to give you a range.	1:23:30	1:23:32
It's a little bit too much. I can tell because you...	1:23:32	1:23:34
I just wanted to give you a range. I just...	1:23:34	1:23:36
That was a little too much....	1:23:36	1:23:38
-BIRDMAN: -God! You look like shit, brother.	1:24:31	1:24:35
You get that mongoloid look when you're hungover. Don't you?	1:24:35	1:24:39
Ha-ha! Yeah.	1:24:39	1:24:40
Let's go! Come on. Get up.	1:24:41	1:24:44
It's a beautiful day.	1:24:44	1:24:46
Forget about the Times. Everyone else has.	1:24:46	1:24:51
Come on! Stand up!	1:24:51	1:24:53
So you're not a great actor. Who cares?	1:24:54	1:24:57
You're much more than that.	1:24:57	1:24:59
You tower over these other theatre douchebags.	1:24:59	1:25:03
You're a movie star, man!	1:25:03	1:25:05
You're a global force! Don't you get it?	1:25:05	1:25:08
You spent your whole life building a bank account	1:25:08	1:25:10
and a reputation, and you blew 'em both.	1:25:10	1:25:12
Good for you.	1:25:12	1:25:13
Fuck it. We'll make a comeback.	1:25:13	1:25:16
They're waiting for something huge. Well, give it to them.	1:25:16	1:25:19
Shave off that pathetic goatee. Get some surgery!	1:25:19	1:25:22
60's the new 30, motherfucker!	1:25:22	1:25:25
You're the original, man. You paved the way for all these other little clowns.	1:25:25	1:25:28
Give the people what they want...	1:25:28	1:25:30
..some good old-fashioned apocalyptic porn.	1:25:30	1:25:32
Birdman: The Phoenix Rises.	1:25:32	1:25:34
Pimple-faced gamers creaming in their pants.	1:25:34	1:25:36
A billion worldwide, guaranteed!	1:25:36	1:25:39
You are larger than life, man.	1:25:39	1:25:41
You save people from their boring, miserable lives.	1:25:41	1:25:44
You make them jump, laugh, shit their pants.	1:25:44	1:25:47
All you have to do is...	1:25:47	1:25:49
That's what I'm talking about!	1:25:59	1:26:02
Bones rattling! Big, loud, fast!	1:26:02	1:26:05
Look at these people, look at their eyes. They're all sparkling.	1:26:05	1:26:08
They love this shit. They love blood. They love action.	1:26:08	1:26:12
Not this talky, depressing, philosophical bullshit.	1:26:12	1:26:16
ROARS	1:26:21	1:26:22
Yes!	1:26:25	1:26:26
And the next time you screech...	1:26:26	1:26:28
HE SCREECHES	1:26:28	1:26:30
..it'll explode into millions of eardrums.	1:26:30	1:26:33
You'll glimmer on thousands of screens around the globe.	1:26:33	1:26:38
Another blockbuster.	1:26:38	1:26:41
You are a god.	1:26:41	1:26:43
See? There you go, you motherfucker.	1:26:43	1:26:47
Gravity doesn't even apply to you.	1:26:47	1:26:49
Wait till you see the faces of those who thought we were finished.	1:26:49	1:26:53
Listen to me. Let's go back one more time	1:26:53	1:26:55
and show them what we're capable of.	1:26:55	1:26:58
We have to end it on our own terms...with a grand gesture.	1:26:58	1:27:02
Flames. Sacrifice.	1:27:02	1:27:06
Icarus.	1:27:06	1:27:07
You can do it.	1:27:07	1:27:09
You hear me?	1:27:09	1:27:11
You are...	1:27:11	1:27:13
Birdman!	1:27:13	1:27:14
Hey! Is this for real or are you shooting a film?	1:27:18	1:27:22
A film!	1:27:23	1:27:25
You people are full of shit!	1:27:25	1:27:27
Hey, man, can I help you?	1:27:29	1:27:31
You should be careful.	1:27:32	1:27:33
Sorry, I can't talk. I'm late.	1:27:33	1:27:36
Music.	1:27:36	1:27:37
CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS	1:27:37	1:27:40
MUSIC STOPS	1:27:40	1:27:41
You OK, man?	1:27:42	1:27:43
You want me to call somebody for you?	1:27:45	1:27:47
Do you know where to go?	1:27:49	1:27:50
Yeah.	1:27:55	1:27:56
I know where to go.	1:27:56	1:27:57
Oh! Hey! No, wait! What the fu...!	1:27:59	1:28:01
CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS	1:28:06	1:28:12
Oh! Oh!	1:28:12	1:28:13
HE LAUGHS	1:28:17	1:28:20
Whoa!	1:28:26	1:28:27
HE LAUGHS	1:28:27	1:28:29
MUSIC STOPS	1:28:38	1:28:39
You see?	1:28:42	1:28:44
This is where you belong.	1:28:44	1:28:46
Above them all.	1:28:50	1:28:52
Hey, you! Hey!	1:28:55	1:28:57
CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS	1:28:57	1:29:04
Stop the music. MUSIC STOPS	1:29:51	1:29:53
-Hey, hey, hey! -I beg your pardon?	1:29:53	1:29:54
Hello, sir? Hello! Sir, you did not pay me!	1:29:54	1:29:56
What are you doing? Where are you going? Hey!	1:29:56	1:29:59
Hey, are you deaf, idiot?	1:29:59	1:30:01
This guy didn't pay me, man. He's fucking crazy!	1:30:01	1:30:03
Not a bad first act, huh?	1:30:36	1:30:37
Not bad at all.	1:30:37	1:30:39
It's going really well.	1:30:39	1:30:40
I didn't think he could do Broadway.	1:30:40	1:30:42
I never would have expected it, from him.	1:30:42	1:30:44
If the second act is half as good as that...	1:30:44	1:30:45
It's pretty glorious.	1:30:45	1:30:47
What do we talk about when we talk about Riggan Thomson?	1:30:47	1:30:49
How long's the intermission?	1:30:49	1:30:50
Birdman can act.	1:30:50	1:30:52
Oh! Whoa.	1:31:10	1:31:11
I just came to say hello.	1:31:11	1:31:13
It's going great out there. You're so good.	1:31:13	1:31:17
I mean it. You're... I really mean it.	1:31:17	1:31:18
Places for the final scene, Riggan. Places for the final scene.	1:31:18	1:31:22
Do you need to...?	1:31:22	1:31:23
No, it's fine. Just sit here for a second.	1:31:23	1:31:25
Look at all these roses.	1:31:25	1:31:27
I hate roses.	1:31:27	1:31:28
And you hate roses.	1:31:28	1:31:29
Are you OK? You seem...	1:31:31	1:31:34
You seem... I don't know, you seem abnormally calm.	1:31:34	1:31:37
I am calm.	1:31:39	1:31:40
I am great, actually.	1:31:41	1:31:43
You know...	1:31:45	1:31:47
I got this...little voice... talks to me sometimes.	1:31:47	1:31:51
Tells me the truth.	1:31:51	1:31:53
It's comforting.	1:31:53	1:31:55
Kind of scary, but it's comforting.	1:31:55	1:31:57
I'm going to pretend I didn't hear you say that.	1:31:57	1:31:59
OK.	1:31:59	1:32:01
You wouldn't believe the crowd outside.	1:32:01	1:32:03
They said some people paid up to 500 a ticket.	1:32:03	1:32:06
Really?	1:32:06	1:32:07
Hey.	1:32:08	1:32:10
-Can I tell you something funny? -Sure.	1:32:11	1:32:13
You remember our last anniversary party?	1:32:14	1:32:16
Seriously? You're going to ruin a nice moment, with that?	1:32:16	1:32:18
Do you remember the party?	1:32:18	1:32:20
The party where you fucked Janet Rossbach, in our bed.	1:32:20	1:32:22
Try to skip over that part.	1:32:22	1:32:23
Oh, gladly.	1:32:23	1:32:25
And you threw all the guests out of the house...	1:32:25	1:32:27
..and you threw all the furniture out the window.	1:32:27	1:32:29
-I remember... -And you locked yourself in the bathroom.	1:32:29	1:32:31
Riggan. Why are we talking about...	1:32:31	1:32:33
I drove out to...	1:32:33	1:32:34
..Malibu.	1:32:34	1:32:37
And I just sat on the beach, for a while, looking out at the ocean.	1:32:37	1:32:40
Riggan.	1:32:40	1:32:42
And I...walked...	1:32:42	1:32:44
..straight into the water.	1:32:44	1:32:45
And then I tried to drown myself.	1:32:50	1:32:52
I was up to my chest when I felt the first one.	1:32:57	1:33:00
On my back, it was like somebody was	1:33:00	1:33:02
holding a frying pan against me and really burning.	1:33:02	1:33:04
And then they were on my chest and all over my legs.	1:33:04	1:33:09
The water was full of jellyfish.	1:33:09	1:33:11
They were all over me.	1:33:13	1:33:15
I-I had to fight my way out of the water and went up to the...beach.	1:33:15	1:33:18
I was rolling around like a maniac in the sand...	1:33:18	1:33:23
..crying.	1:33:23	1:33:24
You said it was a sunburn.	1:33:25	1:33:27
Yeah, I know. And you believed me.	1:33:28	1:33:32
To be honest, I didn't give a shit.	1:33:32	1:33:34
I love you.	1:33:42	1:33:43
And I love Sam.	1:33:47	1:33:48
I know.	1:33:48	1:33:49
I really wish I wouldn't have videotaped her birth, though.	1:33:53	1:33:56
Why?	1:33:56	1:33:57
Cos...	1:33:57	1:33:58
..I just missed the moment, really.	1:33:59	1:34:01
I don't have it.	1:34:01	1:34:03
I should have just been there with the two of you.	1:34:03	1:34:05
You know...just the three of us.	1:34:05	1:34:09
But I wasn't.	1:34:12	1:34:14
I wasn't even present in my own life, and now I don't have it...	1:34:14	1:34:17
..and, I'm never going to have it.	1:34:17	1:34:19
You have Sam.	1:34:19	1:34:20
Not really, I don't. I mean, she's...	1:34:20	1:34:22
No, no, no. Listen, she's just going through...	1:34:22	1:34:24
No, I get it, I understand.	1:34:24	1:34:26
I know she needed to have a dad...	1:34:26	1:34:28
..and instead she got this guy who was...	1:34:28	1:34:31
..a three-day viral sensation.	1:34:31	1:34:34
-It is so pathetic, I can't... -No. Come on.	1:34:34	1:34:36
There are things more pathetic things than that.	1:34:36	1:34:38
Yeah, like?	1:34:38	1:34:39
That moustache.	1:34:39	1:34:40
Riggan, we are in the motel.	1:34:45	1:34:47
Last scene has started. You're not here.	1:34:47	1:34:50
Last chance for "places".	1:34:50	1:34:53
You better get back to your seat.	1:34:53	1:34:55
20 little leopards laughed at two lofty lions.	1:35:14	1:35:19
20 little leopards laughed at two lofty lions.	1:35:19	1:35:22
20 little leopards laughed at two lofty lions.	1:35:22	1:35:26
20 little leopards laughed at two lofty lions.	1:35:26	1:35:30
Mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum...	1:35:30	1:35:35
DRUMMER PLAYS	1:35:43	1:35:44
Break a leg, Mr Thomson.	1:35:56	1:35:58
Let me put the blood rig on? Hey!	1:36:26	1:36:30
Hey!	1:36:32	1:36:34
Riggan!	1:36:34	1:36:36
Hey!	1:36:36	1:36:37
SOUND EFFECT OF THUNDERSTORM	1:36:39	1:36:40
Terri!	1:36:44	1:36:46
Terri!	1:36:46	1:36:47
Eddie! What are you doing here?	1:36:48	1:36:50
Why? I just want you to tell me why. Just tell me why.	1:36:50	1:36:53
-Shut up! -Eddie, please!	1:36:53	1:36:56
What's the matter with me?	1:36:56	1:36:57
Tell me what's the matter. Why do I always end up having to beg people to love me?	1:36:57	1:37:01
Eddie, please, give me the gun.	1:37:01	1:37:03
It was me. I was drowning. I'm just not capable of...	1:37:03	1:37:06
You deserve to be loved, Eddie. You do.	1:37:06	1:37:09
I just wanted to be what you wanted. What YOU wanted.	1:37:11	1:37:15
Now I spend every fucking minute trying	1:37:15	1:37:17
to be something else, something I'm not.	1:37:17	1:37:19
Just put the gun down, Ed.	1:37:19	1:37:21
She doesn't love you anymore.	1:37:21	1:37:22
You don't, do you?	1:37:25	1:37:27
No.	1:37:27	1:37:28
And you never will.	1:37:28	1:37:30
I'm sorry.	1:37:30	1:37:31
Ah.	1:37:31	1:37:33
I don't exist.	1:37:42	1:37:43
I'm not even here.	1:37:47	1:37:48
I'm not even here.	1:37:50	1:37:52
Bang!	1:37:52	1:37:53
Bang!	1:38:05	1:38:06
GUNSHOT	1:38:15	1:38:16
AUDIENCE GASPS	1:38:16	1:38:17
APPLAUSE	1:38:23	1:38:25
CHEERING	1:38:27	1:38:29
MUFFLED DRUMMING AND MUSIC	1:39:01	1:39:02
SILENCE	1:39:36	1:39:37
KNOCK ON DOOR	1:39:47	1:39:48
Yes?	1:39:51	1:39:53
Is he up?	1:39:55	1:39:57
He just woke up.	1:39:57	1:39:58
I thought I lost you, buddy.	1:40:03	1:40:05
What the hell happened?	1:40:07	1:40:09
I was watching you on that stage and then, all of a sudden...	1:40:09	1:40:12
..you had that goofy look in your eye and you were just, like...	1:40:12	1:40:16
What is wrong with you? He tried...	1:40:16	1:40:18
I'm happy! He's alive! My best friend is alive! And...	1:40:18	1:40:22
..he happens to be, the fucking man of the hour.	1:40:22	1:40:24
What is that?	1:40:24	1:40:25
You have to be shitting me.	1:40:25	1:40:27
Read it.	1:40:27	1:40:28
I don't believe this. "The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance"?	1:40:28	1:40:31
Read it.	1:40:31	1:40:33
"By Tabitha Dickinson."	1:40:33	1:40:34
Read it out loud!	1:40:34	1:40:36
"Thomson has unwittingly given birth	1:40:36	1:40:38
"to a new form, which can only be described as...	1:40:38	1:40:41
"..super-realism.	1:40:41	1:40:43
"Blood was spilled both literally and metaphorically	1:40:43	1:40:45
"by artist and audience, alike.	1:40:45	1:40:47
"Real blood.	1:40:47	1:40:49
"The blood that has been sorely missing	1:40:49	1:40:51
"from the veins of the American theatre..."	1:40:51	1:40:53
You're happy about this?	1:40:54	1:40:57
Happy? I'm fucking euphoric!	1:40:57	1:40:59
This is the-this is the kind of review that turns people into living legends!	1:40:59	1:41:01
He shot the nose off his face!	1:41:01	1:41:03
He's got a new nose!	1:41:03	1:41:05
And if he doesn't like that one, we'll get him a new one!	1:41:05	1:41:08
We'll use Meg Ryan's guy. Who gives a shit?	1:41:08	1:41:10
They're lighting candles for him in Central Park.	1:41:10	1:41:12
Turn on your TV. Where's the...	1:41:12	1:41:14
-TV: -..a spontaneous vigil for actor Riggan Thomson.	1:41:15	1:41:17
They're praying for him all across the country. He did it. You did it!	1:41:17	1:41:21
I've been reborn, brother. And I can see the future.	1:41:21	1:41:24
This play is going to last forever.	1:41:24	1:41:26
It's going to open in London and Paris,	1:41:26	1:41:28
and the studio is going to call again and	1:41:28	1:41:30
we're going to get some book deals...you'll see.	1:41:30	1:41:31
So you can see the future?	1:41:31	1:41:33
Yeah, I can see the future!	1:41:33	1:41:35
How about that, huh? Did you see that coming?	1:41:35	1:41:38
Why aren't you saying anything?	1:41:39	1:41:42
This is what you wanted, wasn't it?	1:41:42	1:41:44
Riggan, this is what you wanted.	1:41:44	1:41:46
Yeah.	1:41:48	1:41:49
Yeah, this is what I wanted.	1:41:49	1:41:51
OK, listen. You're going to get hit	1:41:51	1:41:53
with a "brandishing a weapon" charge. OK?	1:41:53	1:41:56
If anybody talks to you about it, it was an accident.	1:41:56	1:41:59
Is that what this was?	1:41:59	1:42:00
-An accident? -An accident. That's what I want to film...	1:42:01	1:42:04
Did you intend to shoot yourself!	1:42:04	1:42:06
You motherfuckers, this is a hospital! Get the fuck out of here!	1:42:06	1:42:09
This is a hospital!	1:42:09	1:42:12
Get the fuck out, you assholes!	1:42:12	1:42:15
Out! This is a personal matter!	1:42:15	1:42:18
A personal matter!	1:42:18	1:42:20
I don't give a shit!	1:42:20	1:42:21
Hey, Sam! What did you feel like	1:42:21	1:42:24
the night your father tried to kill himself?	1:42:24	1:42:26
Lilacs.	1:42:52	1:42:53
-Are you laughing? -Yeah.	1:43:01	1:43:03
What's so funny?	1:43:03	1:43:05
I can't smell them.	1:43:06	1:43:08
What are you doing?	1:43:14	1:43:15
I'm posting a photo of you on your Twitter page.	1:43:15	1:43:17
I have a Twitter page?	1:43:17	1:43:18
Yeah, I set it up today.	1:43:18	1:43:20
-Let me see. -No way.	1:43:20	1:43:22
No. You look hideous.	1:43:22	1:43:23
Oh, wow, thank you. I appreciate it.	1:43:23	1:43:25
I'm just kidding.	1:43:25	1:43:27
No, I'm actually not. You-you do look hideous.	1:43:27	1:43:29
You got 80,000 followers, in less than a day.	1:43:31	1:43:34
-Really? -Yeah.	1:43:34	1:43:35
I'm going to scare the shit out of all of them.	1:43:35	1:43:36
-Let me look at it. -Mmm-mmm. It's done.	1:43:36	1:43:39
-Uh, I'm going to go get a vase, for the flowers. -OK.	1:43:43	1:43:46
Move my...	1:45:17	1:45:18
TOILET FLUSHES	1:45:23	1:45:25
Bye-bye...and fuck you.	1:45:41	1:45:44
Dad?	1:47:08	1:47:09
Dad?	1:47:11	1:47:12
Dad?	1:47:14	1:47:15
SHE CHUCKLES	1:47:39	1:47:40

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